How We Can Break The Tensions In Our Relationships by Sandy Karn
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* How We Can Break The Tensions In Our Relationships
by Sandy Karn
The first word that comes to my mind in lowering tensions in all relationships is
understanding. . . . .
When we understand ourselves better, we can understand others better. Then we can
communicate with each other better. When it comes to understanding each other, we'll
reach a point where adjustments in our styles - to the needs of the others we care about -
become necessary .
To understand each other, we're going to have to figure out
what interests the other person, and why that's so. At that
point, we need to be ready to go beyond what we want, at
times, to maintain harmony in our relationships.
As we recognize the natural styles of another person, we will
better know how to communicate with them. Here are some
examples.
If you're married to someone who constantly lives their life by making lots of reminder
lists of what they need to get done, so things get done right, chances are you're married to
a High C person. They would shutter to think they would make a mistake or forget
something. Their goal is to get it right with no mistakes. That's who they are. Living in
perfection is what they're about.
On the other hand, let's say that you could care less about getting things done, and would
much rather have great relationships with others, with a lot of talking and sharing. It's
probably more natural for you not to want to bother with any lists. In the first place, that's
too task-oriented for you, and relationships that satisfy your people-oriented nature are
much more appealing to you. This would be true if you're a High I, unless you also have a
High C as high as your High I behaviors. Then and only then, might you be interested in
making lists to create more perfection in your life, while you're also having a good time
relating to others.
Here's an example, in principle, that you can do. When you make a point to understand
the other person, and their needs, you can accommodate those behavioral needs as best
you can - whether you would do the same things in the same way yourself.
That's a good way to show that you care, and are making a point to behave in a supportive
way to them, whether that's your style or not.
Another way of saying this is that you're willing and able to relate to the other person in a
way that's most appreciated and accepting by them, which is so encouraging to them.
There's no doubt that adjusting to another person who's style
is so different from yours might be more difficult, but when
you're willing to do this, it goes a long way in building a
stronger relationship that has its own rewards. It's about happiness, peace of mind, and
whatever else you want to
add to your list.
Wishing you the best in building strong relationships with
others,
Sandy Karn
DISC Diva
*******
Sandy Karn is president of her own company, Creative Results
Sources, Inc., a consulting and training company of over 30
years. She is a Field Manager with Inscape Publishing,
publishers of proven self-assessment tools used in training
and consulting. Take her WINNER's PROFILE!
http://www.keykonnections.com/quiz-test.html
by Sandy Karn
The first word that comes to my mind in lowering tensions in all relationships is
understanding. . . . .
When we understand ourselves better, we can understand others better. Then we can
communicate with each other better. When it comes to understanding each other, we'll
reach a point where adjustments in our styles - to the needs of the others we care about -
become necessary .
To understand each other, we're going to have to figure out
what interests the other person, and why that's so. At that
point, we need to be ready to go beyond what we want, at
times, to maintain harmony in our relationships.
As we recognize the natural styles of another person, we will
better know how to communicate with them. Here are some
examples.
If you're married to someone who constantly lives their life by making lots of reminder
lists of what they need to get done, so things get done right, chances are you're married to
a High C person. They would shutter to think they would make a mistake or forget
something. Their goal is to get it right with no mistakes. That's who they are. Living in
perfection is what they're about.
On the other hand, let's say that you could care less about getting things done, and would
much rather have great relationships with others, with a lot of talking and sharing. It's
probably more natural for you not to want to bother with any lists. In the first place, that's
too task-oriented for you, and relationships that satisfy your people-oriented nature are
much more appealing to you. This would be true if you're a High I, unless you also have a
High C as high as your High I behaviors. Then and only then, might you be interested in
making lists to create more perfection in your life, while you're also having a good time
relating to others.
Here's an example, in principle, that you can do. When you make a point to understand
the other person, and their needs, you can accommodate those behavioral needs as best
you can - whether you would do the same things in the same way yourself.
That's a good way to show that you care, and are making a point to behave in a supportive
way to them, whether that's your style or not.
Another way of saying this is that you're willing and able to relate to the other person in a
way that's most appreciated and accepting by them, which is so encouraging to them.
There's no doubt that adjusting to another person who's style
is so different from yours might be more difficult, but when
you're willing to do this, it goes a long way in building a
stronger relationship that has its own rewards. It's about happiness, peace of mind, and
whatever else you want to
add to your list.
Wishing you the best in building strong relationships with
others,
Sandy Karn
DISC Diva
*******
Sandy Karn is president of her own company, Creative Results
Sources, Inc., a consulting and training company of over 30
years. She is a Field Manager with Inscape Publishing,
publishers of proven self-assessment tools used in training
and consulting. Take her WINNER's PROFILE!
http://www.keykonnections.com/quiz-test.html
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