The latest Poems by cats

[Dr. J.]

To a Vase
By Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s Cat

How do I break thee: Let me count the ways.
I break thee if thou art at any height
My paw can reach, when, smarting from some slight,
I sulk, or have one of my crazy days.
I break thee with an accidental graze
Or twitch of tail, if I should take a fright.
I break thee out of pure and simple spite
The way I broke the jar of mayonnaise.
I break thee if a bug upon thee sits.
I break thee if I’m in a playful mood,
And then I wrestle with the shiny bits.
I break thee if I do not like my food.
And if someone thy shards together fits,
I’ll break thee once again when thou art glued.

Cleaning the Box
By Alfred, Lord Tennyson’s Cat

Cat-turds on parquet blocks
Are one clear sign for thee!
‘Tis time to do the cleaning of the box
Which you put out for me.

For while to you my litter seems pristine,
To me it plainly reeks
Like stinking bilges in some barkentine
Becalmed for weeks.

Twilight and evening bell,
And after that the dark!
And there shall be no inkling of farewell,
When I embark.

And though you call for me with plaintive cries
That echo from the rocks,
You will not see your cat materialize,
‘Til you have cleaned my box.