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Simon Mason Given Up Cycling

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Judith

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Dec 3, 2016, 10:21:38 AM12/3/16
to

I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
(lives?) changing experiences.

I'd like to thank him for all the pleasure he has given us here over the years:
and wish him all the best in uk.d-i-y

Bret Cahill

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Dec 3, 2016, 11:22:09 AM12/3/16
to
> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
> (lives?) changing experiences.

The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.


Bret Cahill


Nick

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Dec 3, 2016, 11:41:28 AM12/3/16
to
You should try living in England. Chilly weather is quite a disincentive
too.


Simon Mason

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Dec 3, 2016, 2:10:35 PM12/3/16
to
Here I was on my 58 b/day on 30OCT16 and I intend to cycle to work again very, very soon.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CwALKIrW8AAXcFP.jpg

Simon Mason

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Dec 3, 2016, 2:13:30 PM12/3/16
to
I cycled into a North Sea gale in Dec 2010 when it was -13C at 2330 UTC.
They make them hard in Yorkshire.

Mr Pounder Esquire

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Dec 3, 2016, 2:22:45 PM12/3/16
to
But shirley not on the first day of your new job??!!!
You need to arrive looking smart and smelling okay.
Not looking like a drowned rat and smelling of sweat.
Best not to tell the gaffer that you are a cyclist just yet.
There are those that take a dim view of cyclists.




Judith

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Dec 3, 2016, 2:52:54 PM12/3/16
to
On Sat, 3 Dec 2016 08:22:08 -0800 (PST), Bret Cahill <bretc...@aol.com>
wrote:
Well I think that Simon must have got off his bike 6 times then.

Simon Mason

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Dec 3, 2016, 3:54:16 PM12/3/16
to
I will have to drive in on my first day as I need a locker for my clothes, spare clothes and a bike lock bringing in.

She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and slim.

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 3:59:47 PM12/3/16
to
So you're inconveniencing your workplace?

> She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and slim.

So you got the job because she wants your body?

--
What do you call a smiling black man?
Snigger

Mr Pounder Esquire

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Dec 3, 2016, 4:03:42 PM12/3/16
to
Okay.


Mr Pounder Esquire

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Dec 3, 2016, 4:07:32 PM12/3/16
to
James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Sat, 03 Dec 2016 20:54:15 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
> wrote:
>> On Saturday, 3 December 2016 19:22:45 UTC, Mr Pounder Esquire wrote:
>>> Simon Mason wrote:
>>>> On Saturday, 3 December 2016 16:22:09 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:
>>>>>> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since
>>>>>> his life (lives?) changing experiences.
>>>>>
>>>>> The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> Bret Cahill
>>>>
>>>> Here I was on my 58 b/day on 30OCT16 and I intend to cycle to work
>>>> again very, very soon.
>>>>
>>>> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CwALKIrW8AAXcFP.jpg
>>>
>>> But shirley not on the first day of your new job??!!!
>>> You need to arrive looking smart and smelling okay.
>>> Not looking like a drowned rat and smelling of sweat.
>>> Best not to tell the gaffer that you are a cyclist just yet.
>>> There are those that take a dim view of cyclists.
>>
>> I will have to drive in on my first day as I need a locker for my
>> clothes, spare clothes and a bike lock bringing in.
>
> So you're inconveniencing your workplace?

Proper workplaces have lockers. Why do you not seem to know this?
>
>> She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and slim.
>
> So you got the job because she wants your body?

FFS!




James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 4:55:55 PM12/3/16
to
Funny, I had a desk and an office.

>>> She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and slim.
>>
>> So you got the job because she wants your body?
>
> FFS!

What?

--
Lord of the undone flies - the island of reluctant but inevitable homosexuality.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 3, 2016, 4:57:14 PM12/3/16
to

> > So you're inconveniencing your workplace?
>
> Proper workplaces have lockers. Why do you not seem to know this?

Especially as I launched a one man campaign for them in 2003, despite being labelled a troublecauser for wanting the ban on bike lights lifted.


Mr Pounder Esquire

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:18:58 PM12/3/16
to
Tell us all about it.
Please tell.

You have never worked in a chemical factory.
You have never worked in any factory.
You have never worked in industry.

>
>>>> She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and
>>>> slim.
>>>
>>> So you got the job because she wants your body?
>>
>> FFS!
>
> What?

You made a cheap comment about a bloke who is 17 years older than you
getting a wage that you can only dream about.
You should immediately apologise and hang your head in shame.


Mr Pounder Esquire

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:19:50 PM12/3/16
to
Fuukkiking helllllllllllllllll


James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:27:40 PM12/3/16
to
No, I had proper office jobs, not labourer jobs like you. You were based in a van! Which you broke!

>>>>> She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and
>>>>> slim.
>>>>
>>>> So you got the job because she wants your body?
>>>
>>> FFS!
>>
>> What?
>
> You made a cheap comment

She said he looks fit and slim, what else could she have meant?

> about a bloke who is 17 years older than you
> getting a wage that you can only dream about.

It wasn't a very big wage.

> You should immediately apologise and hang your head in shame.

--
You can't please everyone. But it IS possible to piss 'em ALL off at the same time.

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 3, 2016, 5:28:34 PM12/3/16
to
Why would they ban bike lights? Or do you mean the million candlepower ones that dazzled everyone causing crashes on the worksite?

--
The sailor does not pray for wind, he learns to sail -- Gustaf Lindborg

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:29:15 PM12/3/16
to
England isn't chilly you big girl's blouse.

--
Peter is listening to "DJ Splash - New life"

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:29:31 PM12/3/16
to
Explain Steve Pounder.

--
Hockey is a sport for white men.
Basketball is a sport for black men.
Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. -- Tiger Woods

JNugent

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:43:30 PM12/3/16
to
https://anonmgur.com/?view=37189e398408662359f1657ff1dd67fd.jpg

Simon Mason

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Dec 3, 2016, 5:52:46 PM12/3/16
to
On Saturday, 3 December 2016 22:27:40 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> about a bloke who is 17 years older than you
> > getting a wage that you can only dream about.
>
> It wasn't a very big wage.

£45000 + annual bonus + free shares = £60000.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 3, 2016, 5:57:18 PM12/3/16
to
On Saturday, 3 December 2016 22:28:34 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> Why would they ban bike lights?

They had an historic ban on battery powered devices as ignition sources, but when car keys and phones came on site in their 100's they let them in but still banned bike lights.


James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 6:23:43 PM12/3/16
to
That's Mr Pounder. He's old and fat.

--
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 6:25:20 PM12/3/16
to
We're talking about your new job. Didn't you say something in the 20s?

--
Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy.

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 3, 2016, 6:25:48 PM12/3/16
to
I would have used a dynamo to annoy them.

--
Stupid laws, number 467: In America, it is illegal to put money in someone else's parking meter.

JNugent

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Dec 3, 2016, 9:02:33 PM12/3/16
to
It looks rather like Mason.

Simon Mason

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Dec 3, 2016, 11:46:14 PM12/3/16
to
On Saturday, 3 December 2016 23:25:20 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Sat, 03 Dec 2016 22:52:45 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > On Saturday, 3 December 2016 22:27:40 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> >> about a bloke who is 17 years older than you
> >> > getting a wage that you can only dream about.
> >>
> >> It wasn't a very big wage.
> >
> > £45000 + annual bonus + free shares = £60000.
>
> We're talking about your new job. Didn't you say something in the 20s?

That was my package at BP, the new job will be around £25000, but I didn't ask.


Simon Mason

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Dec 4, 2016, 12:04:31 AM12/4/16
to
Yes, but on the third day I rose from the dead.

Simon Mason

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Dec 4, 2016, 12:06:02 AM12/4/16
to
On Saturday, 3 December 2016 21:55:55 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> >
> > Proper workplaces have lockers. Why do you not seem to know this?
>
> Funny, I had a desk and an office.
>
>

I hated being in an office, give me a lab or a chemical site to work in and I am heaven.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 12:11:14 AM12/4/16
to
On Saturday, 3 December 2016 20:59:47 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> > She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and slim.
>
> So you got the job because she wants your body?

I spent a week in May studying what women find attractive in men as you never know when it may come in useful. Confidence, passion, a logical mind, cares for people and the environment, can be a good father, big hands, strong forearms, smells nice, well groomed, good haircut, no jewellry except a watch, no tattoos, tall, slim and a nice body.

Bod

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Dec 4, 2016, 2:03:47 AM12/4/16
to
Right up there is *a good listener*.

Simon Mason

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Dec 4, 2016, 2:07:50 AM12/4/16
to
I blew that as I had an hour to throw the kitchen sink at it.

Bod

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Dec 4, 2016, 2:23:09 AM12/4/16
to
Can you explain what you mean!

Simon Mason

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Dec 4, 2016, 3:01:03 AM12/4/16
to
Well, if I had spent that hour listening to her instead, I'd have been there all day.

Judith

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Dec 4, 2016, 4:45:13 AM12/4/16
to
On Sat, 3 Dec 2016 12:54:15 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
wrote:

>On Saturday, 3 December 2016 19:22:45 UTC, Mr Pounder Esquire wrote:
>> Simon Mason wrote:
>> > On Saturday, 3 December 2016 16:22:09 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:
>> >>> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since
>> >>> his life (lives?) changing experiences.
>> >>
>> >> The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.
>> >>
>> >>
>> >> Bret Cahill
>> >
>> > Here I was on my 58 b/day on 30OCT16 and I intend to cycle to work
>> > again very, very soon.
>> >
>> > https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CwALKIrW8AAXcFP.jpg
>>
>> But shirley not on the first day of your new job??!!!
>> You need to arrive looking smart and smelling okay.
>> Not looking like a drowned rat and smelling of sweat.
>> Best not to tell the gaffer that you are a cyclist just yet.
>> There are those that take a dim view of cyclists.
>
>I will have to drive in on my first day as I need a locker for my clothes, spare clothes and a bike lock bringing in.
>
>She knows I am a cyclist as she said that I looked real fit and slim.


I bet she's after your body.

Judith

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Dec 4, 2016, 4:46:57 AM12/4/16
to
On Sat, 3 Dec 2016 14:52:45 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
wrote:
Blooming heck - you really are effluent.

(Sorry - typo - I meant affluent)

Judith

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 4:48:09 AM12/4/16
to
On Sat, 3 Dec 2016 20:46:14 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
wrote:

>On Saturday, 3 December 2016 23:25:20 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>> On Sat, 03 Dec 2016 22:52:45 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>> > On Saturday, 3 December 2016 22:27:40 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>> >> about a bloke who is 17 years older than you
>> >> > getting a wage that you can only dream about.
>> >>
>> >> It wasn't a very big wage.
>> >
>> > £45000 + annual bonus + free shares = £60000.
>>
>> We're talking about your new job. Didn't you say something in the 20s?
>
>That was my package at BP, the new job will be around £25000, but I didn't ask.
>

So you went for a job - not knowing what the salary package was.

I thought you had got over your mental health issues.


Simon Mason

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Dec 4, 2016, 4:53:37 AM12/4/16
to
On Sunday, 4 December 2016 09:48:09 UTC, Judith wrote:

> So you went for a job - not knowing what the salary package was.

I want to go back as the same man I was on 21JUN12.
I'd do it for free.

MrCheerful

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 5:06:50 AM12/4/16
to
So the cyclist with the million pound pension pot needs a job? How
strange, I would have thought that he would be retired and watching his
minions clean up after him.

Nick

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 5:33:41 AM12/4/16
to
On 03/12/2016 19:10, Simon Mason wrote:
> On Saturday, 3 December 2016 16:22:09 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:
>>> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
>>> (lives?) changing experiences.
>>
>> The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.
>>
>>
>> Bret Cahill
>
> Here I was on my 58 b/day on 30OCT16 and I intend to cycle to work again very, very soon.
>

Yeah 30 Oct was warm enough. Its a bit colder now and my knees are very
sensitive to the cold. I can ride ok but its just a pain to put on knee
protectors etc, maybe a hat is required today too, looks to be about 3
degrees. I really wish some one made tights with proper knee insulation.


James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 4, 2016, 7:58:46 AM12/4/16
to
The English language really ought to be more clear. Anally retentive sounds like constipation.

--
Two cowboys are talking over a beer, discussing various sex positions.
The first cowboy says his favorite position is "the rodeo".
The other cowboy asks what the position is, and how to do it. The first cowboy says, "You tell your wife to get on the bed on all fours and then do it doggy style. Once things start to get under way and she's really enjoying it, lean forward, grab her by her hair and whisper in her ear, 'Your sister likes this position too.' Then try to hang on for 8 seconds".

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 4, 2016, 9:41:06 AM12/4/16
to
When I say office, it was more a lab with electronics and computers everywhere. But I had a comfy chair in front of the main computer. And my point was there was plenty room without having to use a locker.

--
I go fishing; I catch nothing. I go to orgies; I catch everything.

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 12:45:53 PM12/4/16
to
Never start listening to a woman, she'll go on and on and on for ages!

--
Love conquers all, except in tennis.

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 12:49:55 PM12/4/16
to
Careful, I once took a job thinking it was 18.5K and they gave me 13.5K! I ran away.

--
Definition of a secretary:
An office fixture that isn't permanent until it's been screwed on the boss's desk.

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 4, 2016, 12:50:21 PM12/4/16
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He's the only person I've ever known lacking the imagination to fill his time without working.

--
But she was always fat. She was born an only twin.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 12:57:24 PM12/4/16
to
On Sunday, 4 December 2016 17:50:21 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> He's the only person I've ever known lacking the imagination to fill his time without working.

I just spent 5 hours wiring up a sauna today and ran out of light before I could mow the lawn, fix a leaky roof and repair my world safety award.

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 4, 2016, 1:54:54 PM12/4/16
to
World safety award? Not for wiring saunas I take it.

There you see, you managed to find things to do today.

And why don't you go on some day long cycling trips?

--
If you lose your keys, attempt to drown yourself in a basin of water. Your life will flash before your eyes. Eventually you'll remember the part where you last had your keys.

Simon Mason

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Dec 4, 2016, 2:23:32 PM12/4/16
to
On Sunday, 4 December 2016 18:54:54 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Sun, 04 Dec 2016 17:57:23 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > On Sunday, 4 December 2016 17:50:21 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> >
> >> He's the only person I've ever known lacking the imagination to fill his time without working.
> >
> > I just spent 5 hours wiring up a sauna today and ran out of light before I could mow the lawn, fix a leaky roof and repair my world safety award.
>
> World safety award? Not for wiring saunas I take it.

Making safety videos.

http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm

>
> There you see, you managed to find things to do today.
>
> And why don't you go on some day long cycling trips?

25 miles a day is enough for a man pushing 60.



James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 4, 2016, 3:57:12 PM12/4/16
to
On Sun, 04 Dec 2016 19:23:31 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:

> On Sunday, 4 December 2016 18:54:54 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>> On Sun, 04 Dec 2016 17:57:23 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>> > On Sunday, 4 December 2016 17:50:21 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>> >
>> >> He's the only person I've ever known lacking the imagination to fill his time without working.
>> >
>> > I just spent 5 hours wiring up a sauna today and ran out of light before I could mow the lawn, fix a leaky roof and repair my world safety award.
>>
>> World safety award? Not for wiring saunas I take it.
>
> Making safety videos.
>
> http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm

Yet your sauna blew up.

>> There you see, you managed to find things to do today.
>>
>> And why don't you go on some day long cycling trips?
>
> 25 miles a day is enough for a man pushing 60.

You should drive to work, then cycle for leisure.

--
Why do the Scots wear kilts?
Sheep can hear a zipper at 500 yds....

JNugent

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Dec 4, 2016, 5:01:56 PM12/4/16
to
And modest too?

Simon Mason

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Dec 5, 2016, 1:32:51 AM12/5/16
to
On Sunday, 4 December 2016 20:57:12 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> > http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm
>
> Yet your sauna blew up.

I did not make the sauna, the Finns did.

Bod

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Dec 5, 2016, 1:43:49 AM12/5/16
to
Why should he do what you want!

Simon Mason

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Dec 5, 2016, 2:29:34 AM12/5/16
to
On Monday, 5 December 2016 06:43:49 UTC, Bod wrote:

> >
> > You should drive to work, then cycle for leisure.
> >
> Why should he do what you want!

I'd rather shoot myself than go though this every day.

http://bit.ly/2h4M3hm

Bod

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Dec 5, 2016, 2:46:25 AM12/5/16
to
Understandable.

Judith

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Dec 5, 2016, 4:13:54 AM12/5/16
to
On Sun, 4 Dec 2016 22:32:50 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
wrote:
I wonder - was it perhaps an electrical problem caused by a cow-boy
electrician?



James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 5, 2016, 12:30:34 PM12/5/16
to
Live in a nicer place then.

--
Sat opposite an Indian lady on the train today, she shut her eyes and stopped breathing. I thought she was dead, until I saw the red spot on her forehead and realised she was just on standby.

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 5, 2016, 12:30:43 PM12/5/16
to
Because it's more sensible.

--
An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 a.m and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."
The officer then said, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The man replied, "That would be my wife."

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 5, 2016, 12:40:56 PM12/5/16
to
Everything fails eventually. Decent wiring can handle a short.

--
Drugs lead nowhere, but it's the scenic route.

Simon Mason

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Dec 5, 2016, 12:42:57 PM12/5/16
to
On Monday, 5 December 2016 17:30:34 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Mon, 05 Dec 2016 07:29:32 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > On Monday, 5 December 2016 06:43:49 UTC, Bod wrote:
> >
> >> >
> >> > You should drive to work, then cycle for leisure.
> >> >
> >> Why should he do what you want!
> >
> > I'd rather shoot myself than go though this every day.
> >
> > http://bit.ly/2h4M3hm
>
> Live in a nicer place then.

I do, but my place of work means I have to cross 8 miles of a major city with only one road in or out.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cy7h3aSXgAADFUu.jpg

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 5, 2016, 12:46:06 PM12/5/16
to
You chose the job.

--
7 wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40.

Simon Mason

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Dec 5, 2016, 3:15:56 PM12/5/16
to
On Monday, 5 December 2016 17:46:06 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> >
> > I do, but my place of work means I have to cross 8 miles of a major city with only one road in or out.
> >
> > https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cy7h3aSXgAADFUu.jpg
>
> You chose the job.

It chose me remember.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cy8E6I1WgAEkRDJ.jpg

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 5, 2016, 4:56:53 PM12/5/16
to
You applied to several, which one you took was your choice.

--
Hit the button marked 'STOP' with remaining hand.

JNugent

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Dec 5, 2016, 4:58:23 PM12/5/16
to
On 05/12/2016 20:15, Simon Mason wrote:

> James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

>>> I do, but my place of work means I have to cross 8 miles of a major city with only one road in or out.

>>> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cy7h3aSXgAADFUu.jpg

>> You chose the job.

> It chose me remember.

> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cy8E6I1WgAEkRDJ.jpg

Who came back from suicide, death and fatal infection?

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 5, 2016, 5:05:18 PM12/5/16
to
He thinks it's god's will, he's lost it.

--
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 5, 2016, 5:32:52 PM12/5/16
to
On Monday, 5 December 2016 21:56:53 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> >
> > It chose me remember.
> >
> > https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cy8E6I1WgAEkRDJ.jpg
>
> You applied to several, which one you took was your choice.

It was a chance to turn back 4.5 years of bad history.


Judith

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Dec 5, 2016, 6:12:23 PM12/5/16
to
On Mon, 5 Dec 2016 12:15:53 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
wrote:
Indeed : praise be the Lord

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 5, 2016, 6:35:24 PM12/5/16
to
You live your life like an 8 year old.

--
Beating your wife is like keying your own car.

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 5, 2016, 6:37:52 PM12/5/16
to
[snorts coke onto keyboard]


--
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her somewhere expensive... So, I took her to a petrol station...
And then the fight started...

Simon Mason

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Dec 5, 2016, 10:18:37 PM12/5/16
to
I did last Sunday.

http://middlesbrough-diocese.org.uk/parishes/st-charles-borromeo-hull/

James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 6, 2016, 5:03:42 PM12/6/16
to
Take that fucking religious shite out of my face.

--
Interesting fact number 923:
Half the world's population has seen at least one Bond movie.

Bret Cahill

unread,
Dec 6, 2016, 11:33:45 PM12/6/16
to
> >> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
> >> (lives?) changing experiences.

> > The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.

> You should try living in England. Chilly weather is quite a disincentive
> too.

Cold rainy weather is a problem only because cycling wind speed is too high. Uphill and helmets suddenly become desirable when it's cold out. Today it was just a few degrees above freezing in the Mendocino mountains and I was happy to park the car and run uphill to keep warm.

Cold weather exercise is calorie intensive so you need to plan on eating a lot more.

OTOH if the odds of getting a motor vehicle stuck in the snow are high enough, shivering on a MTB for awhile doesn't seem like such an inconvenience.

For some reason most people are generally happy and laughing when they are shivering.


Bret Cahill


Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 7, 2016, 12:45:38 AM12/7/16
to
On Wednesday, 7 December 2016 04:33:45 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:
> > >> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
> > >> (lives?) changing experiences.
>
> > > The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.
>
> > You should try living in England. Chilly weather is quite a disincentive
> > too.
>
> Cold rainy weather is a problem only because cycling wind speed is too high. Uphill and helmets suddenly become desirable when it's cold out. Today it was just a few degrees above freezing in the Mendocino mountains and I was happy to park the car and run uphill to keep warm.

I used to cycle out of my driveway, turn east into a force 7 coming in off the North Sea with sleet at 0515h and laugh in its face.

"Is this the best that you can do?".

Bret Cahill

unread,
Dec 8, 2016, 1:18:46 AM12/8/16
to
Try cycling in the 50 degree C desert sun. Even the lizards are chillin' underground. I once drank a jug of water in < 5 km. You go indoors and the brine of your face drips into your eyes and you cannot see.

If cold weather was an issue millions of N. Europeans would be moving to Syria instead of vice versa.


Bret Cahill

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 8, 2016, 1:25:04 AM12/8/16
to
On Thursday, 8 December 2016 06:18:46 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:

> Try cycling in the 50 degree C desert sun. Even the lizards are chillin' underground. I once drank a jug of water in < 5 km. You go indoors and the brine of your face drips into your eyes and you cannot see.

Hottest we get here is 30C and I will then cycle home from work along the Humber estuary banks and enjoy the wind in my hair and the fresh air smelling of seaweed.

Judith

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Dec 8, 2016, 3:52:29 AM12/8/16
to
On Wed, 7 Dec 2016 22:25:01 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
wrote:

>On Thursday, 8 December 2016 06:18:46 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:
>
>> Try cycling in the 50 degree C desert sun. Even the lizards are chillin' underground. I once drank a jug of water in < 5 km. You go indoors and the brine of your face drips into your eyes and you cannot see.
>
>Hottest we get here is 30C and I will then cycle home from work along the Humber estuary banks and enjoy the wind in my hair and the fresh air smelling of seaweed.

Fresh air : your arse. You love the smell of shit, diesel and car fumes do
you.



According to the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (DEFRA),
Hull's air pollution index is ten out of ten - meaning the air quality is the
lowest it can be.
http://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/why-hull-has-the-worst-air-pollution-in-britain/story-29714451-detail/story.html

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 8, 2016, 4:09:14 AM12/8/16
to
On Thursday, 8 December 2016 08:52:29 UTC, Judith wrote:
> On Wed, 7 Dec 2016 22:25:01 -0800 (PST), Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
> >On Thursday, 8 December 2016 06:18:46 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:
> >
> >> Try cycling in the 50 degree C desert sun. Even the lizards are chillin' underground. I once drank a jug of water in < 5 km. You go indoors and the brine of your face drips into your eyes and you cannot see.
> >
> >Hottest we get here is 30C and I will then cycle home from work along the Humber estuary banks and enjoy the wind in my hair and the fresh air smelling of seaweed.
>
> Fresh air : your arse. You love the smell of shit, diesel and car fumes do
> you.
>

Nope - looks good to me.

http://bit.ly/2h9dBDx

You can see Saltend and the Pride of Hull in the background.

What do you have, the River Irk and a poxy paint factory?

I am so jealous, as we say.



Peter Keller

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Dec 8, 2016, 5:06:54 AM12/8/16
to
She also has hagfish.

Nick

unread,
Dec 8, 2016, 6:21:37 AM12/8/16
to
On 07/12/2016 04:33, Bret Cahill wrote:
>>>> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
>>>> (lives?) changing experiences.
>
>>> The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.
>
>> You should try living in England. Chilly weather is quite a disincentive
>> too.
>
> Cold rainy weather is a problem only because cycling wind speed is too high. Uphill and helmets suddenly become desirable when it's cold out. Today it was just a few degrees above freezing in the Mendocino mountains and I was happy to park the car and run uphill to keep warm.
>

Rain is a problem because of the dramatic loss of tyre grip, well at
least it is for me on a road bike. Uphill in the rain can be depressing
when your back wheel starts spinning due to loss of friction.

> Cold weather exercise is calorie intensive so you need to plan on eating a lot more.
>

I don't understand this. On a bike my core temperature remains pretty
constant. A "boil in the bag" wind proof jacket ensures that, pretty
much regardless of what I have underneath it. The problem for me is with
extremities and knees.



> OTOH if the odds of getting a motor vehicle stuck in the snow are high enough, shivering on a MTB for awhile doesn't seem like such an inconvenience.
>

In the UK black ice is also a problem in the morning. Cycling in snow is
great fun but black ice is lethal.


James Wilkinson Sword

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Dec 9, 2016, 11:54:42 AM12/9/16
to
On Mon, 05 Dec 2016 06:32:50 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:

> On Sunday, 4 December 2016 20:57:12 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>
>> > http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm
>>
>> Yet your sauna blew up.
>
> I did not make the sauna, the Finns did.

Why do people want to make themselves too hot but not too cold?

--
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the fuck happened.

Bod

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 12:53:55 PM12/9/16
to
On 09/12/2016 16:54, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Mon, 05 Dec 2016 06:32:50 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>> On Sunday, 4 December 2016 20:57:12 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>>
>>> > http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm
>>>
>>> Yet your sauna blew up.
>>
>> I did not make the sauna, the Finns did.
>
> Why do people want to make themselves too hot but not too cold?
>
Answer: Because that's what they prefer.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 1:47:19 PM12/9/16
to
On Friday, 9 December 2016 16:54:42 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Mon, 05 Dec 2016 06:32:50 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > On Sunday, 4 December 2016 20:57:12 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> >
> >> > http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm
> >>
> >> Yet your sauna blew up.
> >
> > I did not make the sauna, the Finns did.
>
> Why do people want to make themselves too hot but not too cold?

We do both - get hot and sweaty and then roll around in the snow.



Mr Pounder Esquire

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 1:52:58 PM12/9/16
to
Bravo! You took his insane bait, and insane bait it was. How does it taste?
Why are you Just so desperate that you Just had to reply to
somebody/anybody?





James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 2:18:20 PM12/9/16
to
It is not bait. It was a simple question. People like to make themselves sweat, why?

--
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked him to forgive me. -- Emo Philips

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 2:18:46 PM12/9/16
to
But do you shiver? If not, you're getting a lot hotter than cold.

--
Hey diddle diddle the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 2:19:16 PM12/9/16
to
That is not an answer. That's like:

"Why is the moon round?" "Because it's not square."

--
A man came home from work earlier than usual and caught his wife in bed with his best friend.
Enraged, the husband grabbed a gun and shot his friend.
His wife said, "You know, if you go on like this, you're going to lose ALL your friends."

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 2:19:47 PM12/9/16
to
On Fri, 09 Dec 2016 18:52:41 -0000, Mr Pounder Esquire <MrPo...@rationalthought.com> wrote:

Says the troll who pokes fun at cats and cyclists just for the sake of it.

Mr Pounder Esquire

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 2:30:03 PM12/9/16
to
James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Fri, 09 Dec 2016 18:52:41 -0000, Mr Pounder Esquire
> <MrPo...@rationalthought.com> wrote:
>> Bod wrote:
>>> On 09/12/2016 16:54, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
>>>> On Mon, 05 Dec 2016 06:32:50 -0000, Simon Mason
>>>> <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>> On Sunday, 4 December 2016 20:57:12 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword
>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>>> http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Yet your sauna blew up.
>>>>>
>>>>> I did not make the sauna, the Finns did.
>>>>
>>>> Why do people want to make themselves too hot but not too cold?
>>>>
>>> Answer: Because that's what they prefer.
>>
>> Bravo! You took his insane bait, and insane bait it was. How does it
>> taste? Why are you Just so desperate that you Just had to reply to
>> somebody/anybody?
>
> Says the troll who pokes fun at cats and cyclists just for the sake
> of it.

My question was directed to Bod, not you.
Well Bod?


James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 2:31:13 PM12/9/16
to
This is a public newsgroup and I will damn well reply if I feel like it.

--
If you lose your keys, attempt to drown yourself in a basin of water. Your life will flash before your eyes. Eventually you'll remember the part where you last had your keys.

Mr Pounder Esquire

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 3:33:37 PM12/9/16
to

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 3:50:04 PM12/9/16
to
I answered it for him as he isn't here. That's allowed by the FAQ'n charter thee knows.

--
Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 4:07:34 PM12/9/16
to
On Friday, 9 December 2016 19:18:46 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> On Fri, 09 Dec 2016 18:47:16 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > On Friday, 9 December 2016 16:54:42 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> >> On Mon, 05 Dec 2016 06:32:50 -0000, Simon Mason <swld...@gmail.com> wrote:
> >>
> >> > On Sunday, 4 December 2016 20:57:12 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:
> >> >
> >> >> > http://www.simonmason.karoo.net/page463.htm
> >> >>
> >> >> Yet your sauna blew up.
> >> >
> >> > I did not make the sauna, the Finns did.
> >>
> >> Why do people want to make themselves too hot but not too cold?
> >
> > We do both - get hot and sweaty and then roll around in the snow.
>
> But do you shiver? If not, you're getting a lot hotter than cold.
>

No because you are hot and sweaty so the snow feels good and soon as you feel cold, you go back in the sauna again.


Mr Pounder Esquire

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 4:08:09 PM12/9/16
to
Ohh he was there all right.
Just too yellow to reply.




James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 4:12:57 PM12/9/16
to
Why not go in the snow first, shiver violently, then enjoy warming up in the sauna?

--
Why do tourists go to the top of tall buildings and then put money in telescopes so they can see things on the ground in close-up?

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 4:13:21 PM12/9/16
to
Why would someone be scared of replying to you? Don't be ridiculous.

--
How do they seperate the men from the boys in the Navy?
With a crowbar.

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 4:54:46 PM12/9/16
to
On Friday, 9 December 2016 21:12:57 UTC, James Wilkinson Sword wrote:

> Why not go in the snow first, shiver violently, then enjoy warming up in the sauna?

That is exactly what I did after cycling home from work in 2010 when it was -13C.

James Wilkinson Sword

unread,
Dec 9, 2016, 4:59:37 PM12/9/16
to
You can shiver violently without going swimming? -13C air isn't that cold even when naked.

--
It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

Bret Cahill

unread,
Dec 14, 2016, 12:27:36 AM12/14/16
to
> >>>> I have it on good authority that Simon has given up cycling since his life
> >>>> (lives?) changing experiences.
> >
> >>> The life changing experience that'll get me off a bike is death.
> >
> >> You should try living in England. Chilly weather is quite a disincentive
> >> too.
> >
> > Cold rainy weather is a problem only because cycling wind speed is too high. Uphill and helmets suddenly become desirable when it's cold out. Today it was just a few degrees above freezing in the Mendocino mountains and I was happy to park the car and run uphill to keep warm.
> >
>
> Rain is a problem because of the dramatic loss of tyre grip, well at
> least it is for me on a road bike. Uphill in the rain can be depressing
> when your back wheel starts spinning due to loss of friction.

Let us know when millions of Northern European cyclists start moving to sunny low tax Syria.


Bret Cahill

Simon Mason

unread,
Dec 14, 2016, 12:46:30 AM12/14/16
to
On Wednesday, 14 December 2016 05:27:36 UTC, Bret Cahill wrote:

> > Rain is a problem because of the dramatic loss of tyre grip, well at
> > least it is for me on a road bike. Uphill in the rain can be depressing
> > when your back wheel starts spinning due to loss of friction.
>
> Let us know when millions of Northern European cyclists start moving to sunny low tax Syria.

WX in Damascus now at 0600 UTC is rain and 8C.
WX here in Yorkshire is dry and 11C, so I will stick to this.

http://bit.ly/2gGMJhe


Bret Cahill

unread,
Dec 14, 2016, 1:22:44 AM12/14/16
to
> > > Rain is a problem because of the dramatic loss of tyre grip, well at
> > > least it is for me on a road bike. Uphill in the rain can be depressing
> > > when your back wheel starts spinning due to loss of friction.

> > Let us know when millions of Northern European cyclists start moving to sunny low tax Syria.
>
> WX in Damascus now at 0600 UTC is rain and 8C.
> WX here in Yorkshire is dry and 11C, so I will stick to this.
>
> http://bit.ly/2gGMJhe

Not that the financial services industry is always 100% functional but moss on the roof would be a "concern" for insurance providers in the U.S.


Bret Cahill

Nick

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Dec 14, 2016, 7:43:41 AM12/14/16
to
Why. I thought moss was relatively harmless. Should I get my roof sprayed?


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