If Jesus and Satan came face to face, you think it'll come to blows?
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
Assuming that Hitler was the Devil it could look ugly for Jesus. But
wait, the Bible doesn't include these details, maybe Jesus will pray
while Satan delivers punches.
"Hey Jesus, this is for you. Chill out and have some fruit punch."
Jesus is moved by so much kindness and they go to a bar to talk about
peace in the Universe.
"All I did with the Jews," Hitler confesses, "is because what they did
to you." "Wait," said Jesus, "you will be saved. Just lend me 20
bucks."
And Peace reigned all over the Earth ever since. Jesus never gave back
the 20 bucks.
--------------------------------------
Earle Jones
<c2ab9a4a-246c-46bc...@x18g2000yqe.googlegroups.com>,
"His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"
<nolionn...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
> while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence...
*
No.
Satan would kick Jesus' ass.
But Jesus would turn the other "cheek".
earle
*
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
> In article
> <c2ab9a4a-246c-46bc-9c25-0e8e7bb2a...@x18g2000yqe.googlegroups.com>,
> "His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"
>
> > So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
> > while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence...
>
> *
> No.
>
> Satan would kick Jesus' ass.
>
> But Jesus would turn the other "cheek".
That sounds like a literal interpretation of the Bible but it makes
sense.
Mike Jones
Philosopher
> So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
> while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
They are the same character. Null game.
Search "morning star" and "bringer of light".
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
> Responding to: His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser
> Philosopher
>
> > So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
> > while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
>
> They are the same character. Null game.
>
> Search "morning star" and "bringer of light".
Jekyll and Hyde?
I think the Devil has been victim of identity theft.
Colanth
TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"
>On Apr 29, 9:08 am, Mike Jones <l...@dasteem.invalid> wrote:
>> Responding to: His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser
>> Philosopher
>>
>> > So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
>> > while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
>>
>> They are the same character. Null game.
>>
>> Search "morning star" and "bringer of light".
>
>Jekyll and Hyde?
More like Mr. Jekyll and Doctor Jekyll.
--
"Men rarely (if ever) manage to dream up a God superior to themselves.
Most Gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child." - Robert A.
Heinlein
Mike Jones
Philosopher
> On Apr 29, 9:08 am, Mike Jones <l...@dasteem.invalid> wrote:
>> Responding to: His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser
>> Philosopher
>>
>> > So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the
>> > jab while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
>>
>> They are the same character. Null game.
>>
>> Search "morning star" and "bringer of light".
>
> Jekyll and Hyde?
>
> I think the Devil has been victim of identity theft.
And quite possibly slander.
Good thing he's just as imaginary as the rest of the cast of one of the
greatest myths ever sold.
Father Haskell
Philosopher" <nolionnoprob...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
> while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
>
> Assuming that Hitler was the Devil
Unlikely. The Devil played blues guitar like Robert Johnson.
Hitler's axe was vibes.
AllSeeing-I
Jesys H Christ, Jones.
"Morning Star" or "sons of the morning" is synonymous to the Sons of
God.
Satan is still an Angel even though he may be a fallen one.
"How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How
art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!"
IE:the descent of Venus from shining morning star to the darkness
below.
Compare:
“I Jesus have sent my angel to you with this testimony for the
churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, the bright morning
star (ho aster ho lampros ho proinos)
Jesus is the BRIGHT morning star, whereas Lucifer is just a morning
star. Both are Sons of God.
--
Stupidity as reached epic proportions across this planet.
Colanth
<allse...@usa.com> wrote:
>"How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How
>art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!"
>IE:the descent of Venus from shining morning star to the darkness
>below.
>
>Compare:
>的 Jesus have sent my angel to you with this testimony for the
>churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, the bright morning
>star (ho aster ho lampros ho proinos)
>
>Jesus is the BRIGHT morning star, whereas Lucifer is just a morning
>star. Both are Sons of God.
So if one person calls you a man and another person calls you a
foolish man, they're talking about 2 different people?
It WOULD be foolish of you to believe that.
--
"I drank WHAT?????" - Socrates
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
They are brothers then. But Satan doesn't seem like a fallen one.
He seems to control the world (according to your own preaching) and I
think he even controls the nukes.
Who controls the nukes if not the Devil?
Too many questions for you? Are they brothers? Does the Devil control
the world? Does he control nuclear weapons?
--
> Stupidity as reached epic proportions across this planet.
"Stupidity is not rewarded in the jungle"
AllSeeing-I
> On Sun, 1 May 2011 02:43:06 -0700 (PDT), AllSeeing-I
>
> >"How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How
> >art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!"
> >IE:the descent of Venus from shining morning star to the darkness
> >below.
>
> >Compare:
> >churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, the bright morning
> >star (ho aster ho lampros ho proinos)
>
> >Jesus is the BRIGHT morning star, whereas Lucifer is just a morning
> >star. Both are Sons of God.
>
> So if one person calls you a man and another person calls you a
> foolish man, they're talking about 2 different people?
That is exactly what I am saying.
Jesus is not Lucifer just because he and lucifer are called 'morning
stars'
>
> It WOULD be foolish of you to believe that.
Tell that to the god haters that make shit up so they can fell warm
and fuzzy inside
AllSeeing-I
Can't you read? They are ANGELS --not brothers..
Angels (depending on their position) are sometimes refered to as
'morning stars' in the bible. Sometimes they are just called, 'stars'.
Lucifer was one of the highest orders of Angels to exist at one time.
A right hand to God, so to speak. He was the leader of those highest
angels that was cast out of heaven. Now I ask you, does that sound
like an entity that has not fallen? Lost his place?.
Saying Jesus is Lucifer because they are both called 'morning star'
clearly demonstrates just how dumb some people really are --about a
book they know very little about.
>But Satan doesn't seem like a fallen one.
What do you know about it, troll?
> He seems to control the world (according to your own preaching) and I
> think he even controls the nukes.
Right. Look at what his influence on the world has done. Start with
the murder of Able and work your way through history,
> Who controls the nukes if not the Devil?
Men under the influence of evil. See any news clip on N.Korea.
> Too many questions for you? Are they brothers? Does the Devil control
> the world? Does he control nuclear weapons?
Like I said, Stupidity has reached epic proportions across this
planet.
You do not seem to have escaped this fact unscathed
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Never met one.
>
> Angels (depending on their position) are sometimes refered to as
> 'morning stars' in the bible. Sometimes they are just called, 'stars'.
>
> Lucifer was one of the highest orders of Angels to exist at one time.
> A right hand to God, so to speak. He was the leader of those highest
> angels that was cast out of heaven. Now I ask you, does that sound
> like an entity that has not fallen? Lost his place?.
>
> Saying Jesus is Lucifer because they are both called 'morning star'
> clearly demonstrates just how dumb some people really are --about a
> book they know very little about.
A guy that makes two sons is called a father. You produced the
evidence.
>
> >But Satan doesn't seem like a fallen one.
>
> What do you know about it, troll?
I only know what I hear. But every sect has a different interpretation
of these "facts"...
>
> > He seems to control the world (according to your own preaching) and I
> > think he even controls the nukes.
>
> Right. Look at what his influence on the world has done. Start with
> the murder of Able and work your way through history,
You have start from the beginning... Evil took the evil bite at a
fruit and voila! We are all doomed! Funny interpretation of justice.
>
> > Who controls the nukes if not the Devil?
>
> Men under the influence of evil. See any news clip on N.Korea.
Let me see... superpower drops two bombs on two different cities. Who
could it be?
>
> > Too many questions for you? Are they brothers? Does the Devil control
> > the world? Does he control nuclear weapons?
>
> Like I said, Stupidity has reached epic proportions across this
> planet.
>
> You do not seem to have escaped this fact unscathed
I have the wisdom of the jungle and evolution behind me, 4 billion
years in the making, and you?
Ken
Philosopher" <comandante.ban...@yahoo.com> wrote to ASSman:
> I have the wisdom of the jungle and evolution behind me, 4 billion
> years in the making, and you?
ASSman doesn't have diddly squat!
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Don't you follow the man that rode an ass?
http://www.dst-corp.com/james/PaintingsOfJesus/Jesus10.jpg
Even my monkey bike is more regal.
AllSeeing-I
You will.
> > Angels (depending on their position) are sometimes refered to as
> > 'morning stars' in the bible. Sometimes they are just called, 'stars'.
>
> > Lucifer was one of the highest orders of Angels to exist at one time.
> > A right hand to God, so to speak. He was the leader of those highest
> > angels that was cast out of heaven. Now I ask you, does that sound
> > like an entity that has not fallen? Lost his place?.
>
> > Saying Jesus is Lucifer because they are both called 'morning star'
> > clearly demonstrates just how dumb some people really are --about a
> > book they know very little about.
>
> A guy that makes two sons is called a father. You produced the
> evidence.
God does not call them "sons". Humans do
> > >But Satan doesn't seem like a fallen one.
>
> > What do you know about it, troll?
>
> I only know what I hear. But every sect has a different interpretation
> of these "facts"...
>
Humans have their faults.
> > > He seems to control the world (according to your own preaching) and I
> > > think he even controls the nukes.
>
> > Right. Look at what his influence on the world has done. Start with
> > the murder of Able and work your way through history,
>
> You have start from the beginning... Evil took the evil bite at a
> fruit and voila! We are all doomed! Funny interpretation of justice.
Sounds unfair .. huh?
> > > Who controls the nukes if not the Devil?
>
> > Men under the influence of evil. See any news clip on N.Korea.
>
> Let me see... superpower drops two bombs on two different cities. Who
> could it be?
Think current events.
> > > Too many questions for you? Are they brothers? Does the Devil control
> > > the world? Does he control nuclear weapons?
>
> > Like I said, Stupidity has reached epic proportions across this
> > planet.
>
> > You do not seem to have escaped this fact unscathed
>
> I have the wisdom of the jungle and evolution behind me, 4 billion
> years in the making, and you?
I have the fact that science is wrong about a lot of things. If it
were not, there would be no need for so much revision
- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
Yap
> On Apr 29, 8:08 am, Mike Jones <l...@dasteem.invalid> wrote:
>
> > Responding to: His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser
> > Philosopher
>
> > > So much hatred, so much at stake... I think the Devil will use the jab
> > > while Jesus will run all over the ring to avoid violence.
>
> > They are the same character. Null game.
>
> > Search "morning star" and "bringer of light".
>
> > --
> > *=(http://www.churchofreality.org/
>
> Jesys H Christ, Jones.
>
> "Morning Star" or "sons of the morning" is synonymous to the Sons of
> God.
>
> Satan is still an Angel even though he may be a fallen one.
What god and what satan?
They were fictitious characters....the same as many stories had their
imagined characters without which a story could not be a story.
>
> "How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How
> art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!"
> IE:the descent of Venus from shining morning star to the darkness
> below.
>
> Compare:
> “I Jesus have sent my angel to you with this testimony for the
> churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, the bright morning
> star (ho aster ho lampros ho proinos)
>
> Jesus is the BRIGHT morning star, whereas Lucifer is just a morning
> star. Both are Sons of God.
It is only in the religious domain that there were these jesus and
lucifer....no other culture in this world knew anything about them or
even heard about them.
>
> --
> Stupidity as reached epic proportions across this planet.
Indeed, the stupidity of Christianity is beyond words.
Colanth
And who would that be? (Remember - you can't hate something that
doesn't exist.)
--
"George Bush says he speaks to god every day, and christians love him
for it. If George Bush said he spoke to god through his hair dryer,
they would think he was mad. I fail to see how the addition of a hair
dryer makes it any more absurd." - Unknown
AllSeeing-I
You must be new around here
Colanth
Me? No, I was here long before you were.
--
"Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!" -French Knight
AllSeeing-I
unlikely
> --
> "Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!" -French Knight- Hide quoted text -
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Stupid wars against terrorism, stupid wars against drugs, stupid
issues deciding national elections (gays, abortion, "family values")
all are product of the Christian of the Christian agenda. Lack of
universal healthcare, lack of safety on the road all happening and
they don't blink an eye.
I think stupidity has reached Biblical proportions.
Zacharias Mulletstein
be allies in torturing the damned in Hell after the End Times. So they
won't hit each other because they'll be too busy hitting the damned in hell.
--
I am a Fundamentalist Christian Pentecostal Warrior for the One lamb virgin,
Jesus Christ.
Zacharias Mulletstein
"AllSeeing-I" <allse...@usa.com> wrote in message
news:e8f136be-7b84-4a7f...@j26g2000yqa.googlegroups.com...
No, he's been here a long time. Name of Raytard.
Colanth
<zmulle...@isalwaysright.com> wrote:
>No, he's been here a long time. Name of Raytard.
Sorry, Zachy, but Ray and I are different people.
--
"Nothing so immunizes the brain to evidence as ideology." - O.W.Holmes
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
It sounds like the alliance between America and Hussein or Gaddhafi in
former times.
Danny Clark
"Mike Jones" <lu...@dasteem.invalid> wrote in message
news:ipfc3d$i2d$2...@dasteem.eternal-september.org...
Had you been overal stipulating that both Jesus Christ and/or the Devil had
only ever been only myths?
Father Haskell
So jesus is like Brad Pitt's character from Fight Club?
Father Haskell
Yup, it's all based on stories told late at night by
nomadic goat herders, way before tv and Ed Sullivan.
People saw the stars, but had no way of knowing
what they really were, so they just made shit up,
and they were happy with it.
Same reason the 3 stars of Orion's belt and the bright
alpha star in Sirius became the three wise guys following
the star in the east.
Father Haskell
Right. He can walk on water, float in the air, but
can't walk into town on his own. Poor donkey.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
I think the donkey is three sizes too small.
He rented the cheapest one he could find to drive his point of being
"down to earth."
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Jesus and Satan made a bet: Who would rule the world from then on...
Jesus was crucified and Satan won. Satan wore the mask of being a
Christian to fool the Christians.
And they lived happily ever after.
Father Haskell
>
> - Show quoted text -
He probably broke the poor animal's back. They
probably had to shoot it.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
Well, Jesus may actually have been able to walk while riding the
donkey.
It was that small.
Father Haskell
>
> - Show quoted text -
A real jesus would have carried the donkey.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
You'd expect him to ride a winged horse and he shows up in a lowly
donkey.
He's totally unpredictable. I think he would ride a skateboard today.
Father Haskell
>
> - Show quoted text -
Add road rash to the rest of his stigmata.
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
He was something else to be sure...
http://urlybits.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Jesus_skateboarding.jpg
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
> Responding to: His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser
> Philosopher
>
> [...]
>
> >> According to the Zach's Bible, Jesus and Satan hung out together. Satan
> >> took him to an 'exceeding high mountain' and showed Jesus all the
> >> kingdoms of the world. I guess that part of the Bible was written by
> >> Terry Pratchett as part of his Diskworld series.
>
> >> Matthew 4:1-8
>
> > Satan met Jesus and said, "Let a game of chess decide who runs the
> > world." And then he cheated Jesus --what do you expect from the Devil?--
> > and won the game.
>
> > This theme was later picked up in a movie I saw.
>
> What would history have recorded had Satan been the good guy, fighting
> against a tyranical overlord collective calling itself "God"?
>
> Obi-Wan-Satan versus God-Vader. Who wins in the end? %)
>
> --
> *=(http://www.churchofreality.org/
This may shock the world of religion... but God made a big mistake by
making Satan...
http://www.theartificialconscience.com/wp-content/uploadsial/2009/11/karlof-frankenstein.jpg
This was the greatest mistake he ever made. God was the creator of
evil.
Zacharias Mulletstein
"His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"
<nolionn...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:a11e41d7-f787-45a4...@t9g2000vbv.googlegroups.com...
I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the
LORD do all these [things]. - Isaiah 45:7
His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher
<zmulletst...@isalwaysright.com> wrote:
> "His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher"<nolionnoprob...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>
> news:a11e41d7-f787-45a4...@t9g2000vbv.googlegroups.com...
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> > On Jun 11, 8:04 am, Mike Jones <l...@dasteem.invalid> wrote:
> >> Responding to: His Highness the TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser
> >> Philosopher
>
> >> [...]
>
> >> >> According to the Zach's Bible, Jesus and Satan hung out together.
> >> >> Satan
> >> >> took him to an 'exceeding high mountain' and showed Jesus all the
> >> >> kingdoms of the world. I guess that part of the Bible was written by
> >> >> Terry Pratchett as part of his Diskworld series.
>
> >> >> Matthew 4:1-8
>
> >> > Satan met Jesus and said, "Let a game of chess decide who runs the
> >> > world." And then he cheated Jesus --what do you expect from the
> >> > Devil?--
> >> > and won the game.
>
> >> > This theme was later picked up in a movie I saw.
>
> >> What would history have recorded had Satan been the good guy, fighting
> >> against a tyranical overlord collective calling itself "God"?
>
> >> Obi-Wan-Satan versus God-Vader. Who wins in the end? %)
>
> >> --
> >> *=(http://www.churchofreality.org/
>
> > This may shock the world of religion... but God made a big mistake by
> > making Satan...
>
>
> > This was the greatest mistake he ever made. God was the creator of
> > evil.
>
> I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the
> LORD do all these [things]. - Isaiah 45:7
He makes war too. I wonder why he sent Jesus on a peace mission then.
Was he trying to clean his record?
Uergil
"Zacharias Mulletstein" <zmulle...@isalwaysright.com> wrote:
> I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the
> LORD do all these things. - Isaiah 45:7, KJV
I am not likely to honor a maker of evil, even if I believed in one.
--
"Ignorance is preferable to error, and he is less
remote from the- truth who believes nothing than
he who believes what is wrong.
Thomas Jefferson