Dialog with Henry
in One Act
[HENRY adjusts his oxygen cannula and flicks an empty dog food can off
the porch into the weeds.]
HENRY: You know, the interior of the earth is made of cold mud.
GUEST: What? You believe that?
HENRY: Of course I believe it. All true geologists believe it. Except
for the misinformed rabble who think it's hollow.
GUEST: I think the number of people who believe it's hollow is probably
very small. I think most people believe there is a mantle surrounding a
hot, solid metallic core.
HENRY: All the data support cold mud, and there's not a stick of data
supporting this ridiculous metallic core idea! If it were metallic,
there would very likely be some sort of magnetic field.
GUEST: Pretty sure there is a magnetic field.
HENRY: Impossible. The magnetic field would be too small to measure.
GUEST: Well, I have a compass right here....
HENRY: You mean a cold mud detector?
[About a half a minute of silence while the two of them watch flies
swarm around the can of dog food.]
GUEST: You just like to make stuff up to see what people will say, don't
you?
HENRY: Of course! What else am I going to do with all my time?
GUEST: Well, you could look up some facts, I suppose, to make what you
say sound a little less ridiculous.
HENRY: That's far too much work for someone as important as me. I have
to defend myself against people like you who have stolen [points to the
compass in GUEST'S hand] my patent for a cold mud detector.