OT: Grocery store
Robatoy
front of him is a woman.
She puts on the belt: a single potato, a small container of milk, half
a carton of eggs,
3 slices of ham, a small handful of green beans, two crusty buns and
one apple.
The guy in front of me says to her: "You're single, aren't you?"
She bats her eyes and says: "How did you guess?"
He replies: "Because you're rather ugly."
Bill
I think that's too mean spirited to qualify as a "joke".
"She" should have replied, "You're rather quite a piece of work yourself."
Robatoy
You didn't crack a smile even?
Robatoy
" Does this dress make my butt look big?
.
.
"Nooo.. it's your BUTT that makes that dress look big...."
George W Frost
"Robatoy" <counte...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:ca1c0d45-8089-4e8d...@k7g2000yqj.googlegroups.com...
*****************
Good one Rob
nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct assholes
who try to stop anyone having any enjoyment in life
whether it be through a joke, or even living in your own home, or,
changing a joke so that it suits them.
Maybe this "Bill" is either a single ugly woman
or if he is a male
then he would be married to a butt-ugly woman and is trying to make excuses
for living with it
Robatoy
> "Robatoy" <counterfit...@gmail.com> wrote in message
I guess to some, everybody is beautiful.
"You're fat!"
"..it hurts my feelings when you call me fat..."
"Well then, put down that box of donuts and let's talk about this..."
DGDevin
"Robatoy" wrote in message
news:ca1c0d45-8089-4e8d...@k7g2000yqj.googlegroups.com...
>> I think that's too mean spirited to qualify as a "joke".
>> "She" should have replied, "You're rather quite a piece of work
>> yourself."
> You didn't crack a smile even?
No, why, there was no joke.
Now if she had replied, "Okay, I'm ugly, and you're an asshole. But I can
always put on makeup," then it might have been worth a smile.
Larry Jaques
Did you say "mean spirited", Bill? Y'mean Toy is now a fellow
Republican, like his buddy, Sarah Palin?
<nomex: ON>
--
To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.
-- J. K. Rowling
Bill
Sorry, I saw tears in her eyes...
Bill
Michael Kenefick
<snip>
Robatoy
> This was an old joke! OP did not really hear that at the store.
No shit, Sherlock?
Robatoy
> On Tue, 01 Feb 2011 14:59:53 -0500, Bill <B...@NOSPAM.net> wrote:
> >Robatoy wrote:
> >> There is a guy in front of me at the grocery store check-out and in
> >> front of him is a woman.
>
> >> She puts on the belt: a single potato, a small container of milk, half
> >> a carton of eggs,
>
> >> 3 slices of ham, a small handful of green beans, two crusty buns and
> >> one apple.
>
> >> The guy in front of me says to her: "You're single, aren't you?"
>
> >> She bats her eyes and says: "How did you guess?"
>
> >> He replies: "Because you're rather ugly."
>
> >I think that's too mean spirited to qualify as a "joke".
> >"She" should have replied, "You're rather quite a piece of work yourself."
>
> Did you say "mean spirited", Bill? Y'mean Toy is now a fellow
> Republican, like his buddy, Sarah Palin?
>
> <nomex: ON>
>
Who'se trolling now, Jackko? LOL
Gawd... I express a couple of conservative views and now I'm trying to
crawl under Palin's skirt?
Robatoy
Now THAT is sooo kneeslappingggg...awful... "I can always put on make-
up, yes but tomorrow I'll be sober....come ON, that line is as dead as
your sense of humour.
SonomaProducts.com
> Gawd... I express a couple of conservative views and now I'm trying to
>
> - Show quoted text -
Nuttin' better than Alaska Salmon
Larry Blanchard
> Good one Rob
> nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct
> assholes
Nothing irritates me more than someone who can't express himself without
profanity.
And "politically correct" has nothing to do with it - it was a lousy joke.
--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw
Robatoy
> On Wed, 02 Feb 2011 09:21:25 +1100, George W Frost wrote:
> > Good one Rob
> > nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct
> > assholes
>
> Nothing irritates me more than someone who can't express himself without
> profanity.
>
> And "politically correct" has nothing to do with it - it was a lousy joke.
>
That either tells us something about the joke, or about you.
Now tell us one that YOU think is hilarious.
Zz Yzx
<lbl...@fastmail.fm> wrote:
>On Wed, 02 Feb 2011 09:21:25 +1100, George W Frost wrote:
>
>> Good one Rob
>> nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct
>> assholes
>
>Nothing irritates me more than someone who can't express himself without
>profanity.
>
>And "politically correct" has nothing to do with it - it was a lousy joke.
Besides "political correctness" doesn't really exist. It's a made-up
concept that postulates that you can "pick up a turd by the clean
end".
-Zz
Zz Yzx
GOOD ONE!
Larry Jaques
I knew it! Thanks for confessing. It's good for the soul. (And other
parts of the shoe, you heel.)
Mike Marlow
>
> Besides "political correctness" doesn't really exist. It's a made-up
> concept that postulates that you can "pick up a turd by the clean
> end".
>
POTW!!!!!
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
Mike Marlow
So - if the same kind of humor is pointed in one direction it's ok, but if
it's pointed in the opposite direction, it's foul? You are suggesting that
the very same kind of punch line would be acceptable, as long as it comes
from her. And your point is?
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
Robatoy
Mike Marlow
>
> Gawd... I express a couple of conservative views and now I'm trying to
> crawl under Palin's skirt?
Post what ya find under there. Moose hide? Other?
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
George W Frost
"Mike Marlow" <mmarlo...@windstream.net> wrote in message
news:25b17$4d48c0f3$adbc2fcd$10...@ALLTEL.NET...
> Robatoy wrote:
>
>>
>> Gawd... I express a couple of conservative views and now I'm trying to
>> crawl under Palin's skirt?
>
> Post what ya find under there. Moose hide? Other?
>
I only wish that you would find me under there
>
> -Mike-
> mmarlo...@windstream.net
>
Doug Miller
being ugly is immature and cruel: we can't help what features we were born
with, and it's in exactly the same category as making fun of someone's skin
color. Ugly isn't a matter of choice. Being a jerk is. Jerks are jerks because
they *choose* to be jerks. They can also choose to *not* be jerks -- and
making fun of them when they are is one way of getting them to stop.
RonB
> "Robatoy" <counterfit...@gmail.com> wrote in message
Jeash --- Let's hear it for mean spirited.
Zz Yzx
wrote:
'zactly. And, in my book, the "joke" ridicules the insensitive,
unintelligent, snd prodefull man moreso than an unattractive woman.
Doesn't it?
-Zz
Mike Marlow
I completely agree with that but - Doug - it was a joke. Not a real world
experience. A joke like that has much more of a punch line than the
obvious, but one of those punch lines is the build up that leads the reader
to believe something - that concludes in a completely different manner.
A... paraprosdokian.
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
Robatoy
Some people will always find something negative about anything... they
thrive on that...that and being sanctimonious.
Doug Miller
The revised version which includes "Now, if she had replied....", yes. The
original, no. The original is simply cruel.
Doug Miller
Of course it was a joke. Just not a *funny* one.
Robatoy
wrote:
Yup, that's the technique. I didn't know what it was called, and it
was nothing personal. I should have called the woman grumpy, rather
than ugly.
Bill
Sorry to say it, but I think the only way to find the original joke
funny is to have a self-esteem problem.
Bill
Robatoy
How so, Billy?
Bill
I don't wish to offend you, so let's just leave it at that.
George W Frost
"RonB" <rnrb...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:c8de9667-f327-45db...@m13g2000yqb.googlegroups.com...
******************************
Okay, I'll drink to that !!
George W Frost
"Doug Miller" <spam...@milmac.com> wrote in message
news:iiakpg$vv9$1...@news.eternal-september.org...
What a fucking wimp !!
"Now, if she had replied..."
That is just hindsight at its best
You know that hindsight is man's greatest asset?
"If only"
If only this
If only that.
All very well to criticize what someone says well after it has been said
it usually takes morons a long time to think things up to try and retaliate.
The original joke, and a joke it was, was quite good,
even though I had heard it many times before about many different people
male and female according to whoever related it,
I still consider it a joke and I will defend the original writer for having
enough guts to send it,
not like some of those mealy mouthed wimps who start to complain well after
the event.
Just because it doesn't suit them.
There are lots of things on this earth which might not suit most people,
but, the majority of people have learned to live with it and get on with
their lives.,
I would suggest that you try and do likewise
George W Frost
"Robatoy" <counte...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:3a93dc4c-514a-4d08...@n10g2000yqf.googlegroups.com...
************************
Why call her something other than what she really is ??
George W Frost
"Bill" <Bi...@NOSPAM.net> wrote in message
news:iiau8...@news6.newsguy.com...
That answer is because you haven't got a reasonable answer, or you just
don't have the balls to reply
Gutless wonder.
Bill
Nope, I'm too busy for you too.
George W Frost
"Bill" <Bi...@NOSPAM.net> wrote in message
Too busy huh ??
And all this from a wimp who replies from an anonymous address
Robatoy
Oh, come on... give it a shot. Of the few problems *I* do have, self
esteem isn't one of them.
willshak
> On Feb 1, 2:59 pm, Bill <B...@NOSPAM.net> wrote:
>
>> Robatoy wrote:
>>
>>> front of him is a woman.
>>>
>>> She puts on the belt: a single potato, a small container of milk, half
>>> a carton of eggs,
>>>
>>> 3 slices of ham, a small handful of green beans, two crusty buns and
>>> one apple.
>>>
>>> The guy in front of me says to her: "You're single, aren't you?"
>>>
>>> She bats her eyes and says: "How did you guess?"
>>>
>>> He replies: "Because you're rather ugly."
>>>
>> "She" should have replied, "You're rather quite a piece of work yourself."
>>
>
> You didn't crack a smile even?
>
I didn't. If I were behind the guy, I would have punched him,
--
Bill
In Hamptonburgh, NY
In the original Orange County. Est. 1683
To email, remove the double zeroes after @
Robatoy
Oooooo tough guy... punching people in fictitious fables...
HeyBub
>>
> I don't see those two as being equivalent at all. To make fun of
> someone for
> being ugly is immature and cruel: we can't help what features we were
> born
> with, and it's in exactly the same category as making fun of
> someone's skin
> color. Ugly isn't a matter of choice. Being a jerk is. Jerks are
> jerks because
> they *choose* to be jerks. They can also choose to *not* be jerks --
> and
> making fun of them when they are is one way of getting them to stop.
You are absolutely right.
Still funny, though.
Robatoy
And yet, when the 'jokes' centre around muslims, arabs, iraqis many
laugh and laugh.
Somewhere the hypocritics [sic] have drawn a line as what THEY think
is funny. Now using Miller's standard, a person is born into a muslim
family, knows nothing else and everybody laughs when "they blow up so
fast".
You see, when one adopts sanctimonious hypocrisy, expect to be held up
to a bar you, yourself set, and if you fail to live up to your own
standards, you're the ultimate fucking loser. Pardon my french...oops,
I just, inadvertently offended millions of Frenchmen.
To so many, the world is simply black and white...oh shit, I just
offended all mankind!!
Miller's stance is simply this: "you may not tell jokes, humour is
evil."
An Israeli, an Englishman and a German walk into a bar. Bartender
says: "What is this? Some kinda joke?"
I just offended THREE, count them THREE nationalities, and a
professional working man (bartender).
Robatoy
> Jerks are jerks because
> they *choose* to be jerks. They can also choose to *not* be jerks -- and
> making fun of them when they are is one way of getting them to stop.
Some more words for you to live by, Miller.
DGDevin
"Robatoy" wrote in message
news:30454602-1038-4f7b...@s18g2000vbe.googlegroups.com...
>> Now if she had replied, "Okay, I'm ugly, and you're an asshole. But I
>> can
>> always put on makeup," then it might have been worth a smile.
> Now THAT is sooo kneeslappingggg...awful... "I can always put on make-
> up, yes but tomorrow I'll be sober....come ON, that line is as dead as
> your sense of humour.
Someone with a sense of humor that relies on pointless derision of a person
for their appearance (rather than their character) is in no position to
lecture anyone else on what is or isn't funny. What's next, you gonna tell
a joke about laughing at someone in a wheelchair?
DGDevin
"Bill" wrote in message news:iiau8...@news6.newsguy.com...
>>> Sorry to say it, but I think the only way to find the original joke
>>> funny is to have a self-esteem problem.
>>>
>>> Bill
>
>> How so, Billy?
> I don't wish to offend you, so let's just leave it at that.
Many years ago the head of the BBC was asked if a particular program might
not offend some viewers (I think it was Monty Python) and he replied, there
are some people one would wish to offend.
In this case, someone who thinks it's amusing to mock someone for their
appearance is telling us more about himself than he realizes.
Robatoy
One night, I was having a few pints in The Jolly Miller (Hog's Hollow,
Toronto) and struck up a conversation with a guy on a barstool next to
me. We talked about cars, sports, weather...and scotch.
At one point, I looked over to say something to him and he had fallen
off his barstool.
He was mumbling and I tried to help him up. But every time, when I
thought I had him back on his feet, he fell down again.
Finally, I told Stu, the bartender to call the guy a cab. I carried
him downstairs to the sidewalk and when the cab showed up, I had to
look in the guys wallet to get his address... I figured, I'll go with
him, and drop him off... it wasn't very far.
When I dragged him to the front porch, I rang the doorbell and his
wife opened the door.
She took one look at her hubby, and thanked me for dropping him off;
taking care of him.
She wanted to pay me for the cab, something I refused.
As I walked off the porch, she asked: "where did you leave his
wheelchair?"
Robatoy
> "Bill" wrote in messagenews:iiau8...@news6.newsguy.com...
You sound ugly.
Robatoy
Why don't YOU tell us a joke, and let's see if *I* can go waaay out of
my way and try to make a big deal out of it?
Go ahead! You have been challenged.
Tell us a joke that is 100% bulletproof to some schmuck who wants to
be an asshole enough to take issue with the premise... Go for it.. I
am waiting...
Larry Blanchard
>
> An Israeli, an Englishman and a German walk into a bar. Bartender says:
> "What is this? Some kinda joke?"
>
> I just offended THREE, count them THREE nationalities, and a
> professional working man (bartender).
But that one *is* funny.
--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw
Bill
Parole violations?
Robatoy
Not bad... LOL
George W Frost
**************************
Oooo That would hurt, getting punched in the fables
But, he also claims heroically, that he would normally attack someone from
behind
REAL hero !!
HeyBub
>
> And yet, when the 'jokes' centre around muslims, arabs, iraqis many
> laugh and laugh.
> Somewhere the hypocritics [sic] have drawn a line as what THEY think
> is funny. Now using Miller's standard, a person is born into a muslim
> family, knows nothing else and everybody laughs when "they blow up so
> fast".
> You see, when one adopts sanctimonious hypocrisy, expect to be held up
> to a bar you, yourself set, and if you fail to live up to your own
> standards, you're the ultimate fucking loser. Pardon my french...oops,
> I just, inadvertently offended millions of Frenchmen.
> To so many, the world is simply black and white...oh shit, I just
> offended all mankind!!
>
> Miller's stance is simply this: "you may not tell jokes, humour is
> evil."
>
> An Israeli, an Englishman and a German walk into a bar. Bartender
> says: "What is this? Some kinda joke?"
>
> I just offended THREE, count them THREE nationalities, and a
> professional working man (bartender).
I'm confused. Are you actually ashamed of offending someone?
Now THAT would be funny.
Or sad.
Just Wondering
> On Feb 1, 7:45 pm, Larry Blanchard<lbla...@fastmail.fm> wrote:
>> On Wed, 02 Feb 2011 09:21:25 +1100, George W Frost wrote:
>>> Good one Rob
>>> nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct
>>> assholes
>>
>> profanity.
>>
>> And "politically correct" has nothing to do with it - it was a lousy joke.
>>
> Allow me to put this in perspective... YOU didn't like it...
> That either tells us something about the joke, or about you.
>
> Now tell us one that YOU think is hilarious.
>
Jumping in where I wasn't invited ...
A guy lost an eye in an accident. He became a recluse out of
self-consciousness. A friend persuaded him to get an artificial eye,
and with reluctance to agreed to go to a dance.
Upon arrival he stood in the shadow by a wall. After a while he saw a
lady sitting alone. Looking closer, he saw the reason she wasn't
dancing - she had an artificial leg.
He thought to himself, "Well, maybe she'd dance with me." Screwing up
his courage, he walked over and asked if she would like to dance.
She looked up at him with a big smile, and said, "Would I! Would I!"
So he pointed back at her and said, "Peg leg! Peg leg!"
Just Wondering
>
> And yet, when the 'jokes' centre around muslims, arabs, iraqis many
> laugh and laugh.
> Somewhere the hypocritics [sic] have drawn a line as what THEY think
> is funny. Now using Miller's standard, a person is born into a muslim
> family, knows nothing else and everybody laughs when "they blow up so
> fast".
>
> evil."
>
> An Israeli, an Englishman and a German walk into a bar. Bartender
> says: "What is this? Some kinda joke?"
>
> I just offended THREE, count them THREE nationalities, and a
> professional working man (bartender).
I wanna play.
They aren't towelheads. Those aren't towels, they're little sheets.
Just Wondering
> On Wed, 02 Feb 2011 06:18:52 -0800, Robatoy wrote:
>
>>
>> An Israeli, an Englishman and a German walk into a bar. Bartender says:
>> "What is this? Some kinda joke?"
>>
>> I just offended THREE, count them THREE nationalities, and a
>> professional working man (bartender).
>
> But that one *is* funny.
>
Three individuals of unstated ethnicity and gender enter a retail
establishment. The customer service representative inquired of them if
their presence evoked humor.
It's the same joke. PC sucks the humor right out of it.
Josepi
blonde chic sitting in a car, obviously waiting for somebody with the window
open. I couldn't resist this one so I struck up a conversation and easily
got a date, for that night with her.
I picked her up at seven o'clock, as arranged, and much to my surprise, when
I got to the door, she was in a wheelchair, permanantly disabled, from an
accident. I didn't want to show any alarm so I figured I would just take her
for a quick burger and dump her home.
After the burger, on the way she home she instructed me to go down an old
dirt road, and stop by a large old tree by the side of the road...asked my
if I wanted some sex!!! Well !
She explained that if I lifted her up she could hold the lower branch and
have a good time with her, which..of course most males would titilate at.
I took her home and her father cornered me with a right out, blunt question
"Did you get a piece of ass?"
"GEEESH!!!!". I told him that was private but asked him why the invading
question.
"Well the last guy left her hanging in a tree!"
"Just Wondering" <fmh...@comcast.net> wrote in message
news:4d49dab9$0$25244$882e...@usenet-news.net...
Robatoy
> When I was younger, walking through a plaza parking lot, I saw a beatiful
> blonde chic sitting in a car, obviously waiting for somebody with the window
> open. I couldn't resist this one so I struck up a conversation and easily
> got a date, for that night with her.
>
HeyBub
For me, the suspension occurred at the punch line.
Josepi
"HeyBub" <hey...@NOSPAMgmail.com> wrote in message
news:5MCdndziNpexl9fQ...@earthlink.com...
For me, the suspension occurred at the punch line.
Larry Jaques
Yeah, buncha sheetheads. Hey, since when is juice slinger (bartender)
a "professional"?
--
Woe be to him that reads but one book.
-- George Herbert
CW
"Larry Jaques" <lja...@invalid.diversify.com> wrote in message
news:mvckk6hoouq2dkra4...@4ax.com...
Upscale
"CW" <cma...@earthlink.nett> wrote in message
>> Hey, since when is juice slinger (bartender) a "professional"?
> Since that is his profession.
Oh good. Since I have full time job in slacking and a second job in food
consumption, I can be considered a multi-faceted professional.
Lobby Dosser
news:ii9on...@news4.newsguy.com...
> Robatoy wrote:
>> There is a guy in front of me at the grocery store check-out and in
>> front of him is a woman.
>>
>> She puts on the belt: a single potato, a small container of milk, half
>> a carton of eggs,
>>
>> 3 slices of ham, a small handful of green beans, two crusty buns and
>> one apple.
>>
>> The guy in front of me says to her: "You're single, aren't you?"
>>
>> She bats her eyes and says: "How did you guess?"
>>
>> He replies: "Because you're rather ugly."
>
>
> I think that's too mean spirited to qualify as a "joke".
Concur!
CW
"Upscale" <ups...@teksavvy.com> wrote in message
news:xss2p.177019$Mg5.1...@en-nntp-06.dc1.easynews.com...
As long as you get paid for it.
Robatoy
> "Bill" <B...@NOSPAM.net> wrote in message
http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o290/Robatoy/Why_So_Serious.jpg
George W Frost
http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o290/Robatoy/Why_So_Serious.jpg
Well, you wont get any smile out of him any more
Robatoy
> "Robatoy" <counterfit...@gmail.com> wrote in message
Oh shit... did I make fun of a dead person again?
George W Frost
******************
Okay, thanks for taking the credit
I thought I that I had.
George W Frost
********************
Only if Bill recognises it and puts in the ledger
Upscale
"CW" <cma...@earthlink.nett> wrote in message
>> consumption, I can be considered a multi-faceted professional.
> As long as you get paid for it.
Not true. Many professionals donate their unpaid time. A doctor volunteering
months of work helping the indigent. Use Haiti as an example. How many
foreign doctors are currently working there? They don't get paid a thing,
yet maintain a professional designation.
Steve Barker
> On Feb 1, 2:59 pm, Bill<B...@NOSPAM.net> wrote:
>>> There is a guy in front of me at the grocery store check-out and in
>>> front of him is a woman.
>>
>>> She puts on the belt: a single potato, a small container of milk, half
>>> a carton of eggs,
>>
>>> 3 slices of ham, a small handful of green beans, two crusty buns and
>>> one apple.
>>
>>> The guy in front of me says to her: "You're single, aren't you?"
>>
>>> She bats her eyes and says: "How did you guess?"
>>
>>> He replies: "Because you're rather ugly."
>>
>> I think that's too mean spirited to qualify as a "joke".
>
> You didn't crack a smile even?
>
>
> Good one Rob
> nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct assholes
> whether it be through a joke, or even living in your own home, or,
> changing a joke so that it suits them.
> Maybe this "Bill" is either a single ugly woman
> or if he is a male
> then he would be married to a butt-ugly woman and is trying to make excuses
> for living with it
>
>
Or Maybe, it's just a joke and it's hifuckinglarrious!
--
Steve Barker
remove the "not" from my address to email
cse...@mts.net
<george...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>"Robatoy" <counte...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>news:8f121d82-c203-484d...@o7g2000prn.googlegroups.com...
>On Feb 2, 8:05 am, willshak <wills...@00hvc.rr.com> wrote:
>> Robatoy wrote the following:
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> I didn't. If I were behind the guy, I would have punched him,
>>
>> --
>>
>> Bill
>> In Hamptonburgh, NY
>> In the original Orange County. Est. 1683
>> To email, remove the double zeroes after @
>
>Oooooo tough guy... punching people in fictitious fables...
>
>**************************
>
>
>Oooo That would hurt, getting punched in the fables
>But, he also claims heroically, that he would normally attack someone from
>behind
>REAL hero !!
>
{GASP} Please tell me that violence is politically correct!!! My
wife's brother-in-law needs a good shit kicking.
P
--- news://freenews.netfront.net/ - complaints: ne...@netfront.net ---
cse...@mts.net
>>> Good one Rob
>>> nothing pisses me off more than these fucking politically correct
>>> assholes
>>
>>profanity.
>>
>>And "politically correct" has nothing to do with it - it was a lousy joke.
>Besides "political correctness" doesn't really exist. It's a made-up
>concept that postulates that you can "pick up a turd by the clean
>end".
>
>-Zz
I like this last response. Can I use it?
____________
A woman walks into a bar, sees an old guy sitting it the corner. She
walks up to him and asks, "Are you a cowboy?"
He replies, "Yes ma'am, I shore am."
"Well I'm a lesbian" she says, "I like women, I want to hug them and
hold them and kiss them and make love to them all nite long". She
turns around and leaves.
A young fellow walks into the bar, sees the old guy and walks up to
him and asks, "Are you a cowboy?"
The old guy looks up and says, "I used to be, but I just found out I'm
a lesbian".
_____________
When I first heard this joke, I decided that I was a lesbian and proud
of it.
Now, I'd be very pleased if the politically correct assholes and joke
police decided to be upset so we can start a new round of whining.
I await!
Robatoy
>
> Now, I'd be very pleased if the politically correct assholes and joke
> police decided to be upset so we can start a new round of whining.
>
There's nothing politically incorrect about the joke I posted. The
woman was ugly, giraffes have long necks and muslims are taught to
hate non-muslims. An average man can lift more weight than an average
woman. All facts.
Assholes are assholes, unless they're black or jewish in which case
calling them assholes is either racist or anti-semitic.
" You hate me because I am gay!!"....noooo I hate assholes.
None of this is particularly complicated... if you're head is on
straight.
HeyBub
>>
>> She bats her eyes and says: "How did you guess?"
>>
>> He replies: "Because you're rather ugly."
>
>
> I think that's too mean spirited to qualify as a "joke".
> "She" should have replied, "You're rather quite a piece of work
> yourself."
I got in the "10 items or less" line behind a woman with 164 things in her
basket.
Just trying to strike up a conversation, I said: "I suppose you've never
been praised for your math skills."
She gave me the stink-eye and replied: "If you say one more thing, I'm
calling the manager!"
"One more thing," I said - just to keep the conversation going, mind you.
From this point on, the story's not very interesting, although the part
about the muskrat did have its moments.
FrozenNorth
> " You hate me because I am gay!!"....noooo I hate assholes.
>
If you liked assholes, you would be gay :-)
--
Froz...
The system will be down for 10 days for preventive maintenance.
Bill
Come on! How can you leave us like that? What about the muskrat???
Bill
DGDevin
"Robatoy" wrote in message
news:24158d5c-3fa8-4415...@r21g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...
> She wanted to pay me for the cab, something I refused.
> As I walked off the porch, she asked: "where did you leave his
> wheelchair?"
And then you said, "Hey, you don't sweat much for a fat broad." Haw! It's
a damn shame Ed Sullivan is off the air, you'd have been a star for sure.
DGDevin
"Robatoy" wrote in message
news:dcc05f74-55ad-4297...@x3g2000yqj.googlegroups.com...
> You sound ugly.
And you sound like someone whose emotional development stopped at about age
twelve. Oh well, they too serve who provide a cautionary tale.
DGDevin
"Robatoy" wrote in message
news:9ad5d11c-e9b0-4a28...@4g2000yqo.googlegroups.com...
> Why don't YOU tell us a joke, and let's see if *I* can go waaay out of
> my way and try to make a big deal out of it?
> Go ahead! You have been challenged.
> Tell us a joke that is 100% bulletproof to some schmuck who wants to
> be an asshole enough to take issue with the premise... Go for it.. I
> am waiting...
Oh dear, your feelings seem to be hurt, poor thing.
Robatoy
That is rude and offensive. And not funny.
Robatoy
Oh, come ON! That's it? You're calling twelve-year old people stupid?
Retarded?
Robatoy
So you don't know any jokes... and that's okay.
DGDevin
"Robatoy" wrote in message
news:e7bcdbdb-0c6e-44ad...@i39g2000prd.googlegroups.com...
> Miller's stance is simply this: "you may not tell jokes, humour is
> evil."
Simply bullshit. He didn't say that, nobody said anything like that, that
is a clumsy attempt at using a straw man to divert attention.
> An Israeli, an Englishman and a German walk into a bar. Bartender
> says: "What is this? Some kinda joke?"
> I just offended THREE, count them THREE nationalities, and a
> professional working man (bartender).
No, you didn't, because you didn't pointlessly denigrate them, you didn't
tell a joke which made light of hostile stupidity, and most of all you
didn't tell a lame-ass joke that wasn't funny and then get all pissy when
people called you on it. If you want to do standup, get better material,
because you're bombing in this club for a reason.
Josepi
"DGDevin" <DGD...@invalid.invalid> wrote in message
news:dtqdne7AwZVjedfQ...@earthlink.com...
Josepi
A racial or slurring joke is not about the mentioned people, it is about the
funny concept the observers have.
You are being trolled by some of the worst ones here and it leads to no
production. Use your killfilters. It's much nicer.
"DGDevin" <DGD...@invalid.invalid> wrote in message
news:h6adnc4RbouhdNfQ...@earthlink.com...
Robatoy
*I* bomb in this club because you have no sense of humour.... I get it
now...
Robatoy
> Don't you get it?
>
> A racial or slurring joke is not about the mentioned people, it is about the
> funny concept the observers have.
>
> You are being trolled by some of the worst ones here and it leads to no
> production. Use your killfilters. It's much nicer.
>
Upscale
"Josepi" <J.R.M.@easynews.calm> wrote in message
> Tell us a joke that is 100% bulletproof to some schmuck who wants to
> be an asshole enough to take issue with the premise... Go for it.. I
> am waiting...
You're the joke. From your first post here to your most recent, the joke has
always been you.
That's about as bulletproof as it gets.
Mike Marlow
Mike Marlow
Ugh-oh... next comes the window licker jokes. This thread is going to get
awful...
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
Mike Marlow
Yeah - what he said. We don't joke about fat broads here - just ugly
ones...
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
FrozenNorth
It is *ugly* to finish properly :-)
Mike Marlow
To borrow from another newsgroup - we need to open the Kill File Bar and
Grill. Exclusive membership. New members have to buy a round for the crew
already on board. All newcomers welcomed...
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net
Mike Marlow
> On 2/03/11 10:59 AM, Robatoy wrote:
>
>> " You hate me because I am gay!!"....noooo I hate assholes.
>>
> If you liked assholes, you would be gay :-)
Ruh-roh... methinks this thread is headed in a bad way...
--
-Mike-
mmarlo...@windstream.net