In
Message-ID:<
2f454563-1482-4559...@googlegroups.com>,
<snip>
>Yes, this was inspired by recent events. It's rather disturbing how little the original lyrics needed to be adjusted for this one
It looks like you wanted to make minimal changes to get your
point across. And you did.
But I was a bit bothered by the scansion on the often repeated
line
>They're leaving America
The original has an extra syllable: "They're coming to America".
If I were writing this, I might put an adjective before
"America". Maybe "new", "this", or "Trump's". Or I might change it
a bit more to "They've set out from America".
But, it's your song to change or leave as you please.
--
Arthur T. - ar23hur "at" pobox "dot" com