if someone died because their hummus was poisoned

[Somebody]

Would that be considered "hummiside"?

[Pico Rico]

"Somebody" <tom.un...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:js35l9$9eu$1...@dont-email.me...

> Would that be considered "hummiside"?
>

not, that would mean the hummus was killed.

So, "hummicide" happens when you make it well, and there is nothing left
because your guests killed it.

[Somebody]

"Pico Rico" <Pico...@nonospam.com> wrote in message
news:js35qq$id9$1...@news.mixmin.net...

>
> "Somebody" <tom.un...@gmail.com> wrote in message
> news:js35l9$9eu$1...@dont-email.me...
>> Would that be considered "hummiside"?
>>
>

> no, that would mean the hummus was killed.

>
> So, "hummicide" happens when you make it well, and there is nothing left
> because your guests killed it.

:)

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 22, 9:26 pm, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:
"Pico Rico" <PicoR...@nonospam.com> wrote in message

> no, that would mean the hummus was killed.


> > So, "hummicide" happens when you make it well, and there is nothing left
> > because your guests killed it.

I don't care for pun humor, it's juvenile and boring. In fact, I
think that people who resort to using it should be punished.

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:5141f5b6-8c35-4ba0...@h20g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...

---

with poisoned hummus?

[Ed Pawlowski]

It takes some intellectual ability to appreciate a good pun. I never
could understand the appeal of the Three Stooges.

[Brooklyn1]

They were way ahead of their time... the Three Stooges schtick wasn't
much different from usenet... just a different medium. They were
actually more informative on an intellectual basis and as farce
certainly more entertaining. Many of those old time cine comic
personalities were better at their craft than any of today's. The
Three Stooges and their contemporaries had real talent, proven by your
remembering. The Three Stooges left such an indelible mark on society
that they will never be forgotten. The Three Stooges were much better
than Joe Biden... history will forget the Obama Clown before Biden.
Binky Biden and the Obama Clown:
http://i46.tinypic.com/mmrhvs.jpg

[Somebody]

"Ed Pawlowski" <e...@snet.net> wrote in message
news:vogbu71ohrv9refa8...@4ax.com...

You've never pushed a pie in someone's face? Or had a food-fight?

[jmcquown]

"Brooklyn1" <Gravesend1> wrote in message
news:n8lbu7t8nl6gds4m2...@4ax.com...

> On Sat, 23 Jun 2012 09:24:49 -0400, Ed Pawlowski <e...@snet.net> wrote:
>
>>On Fri, 22 Jun 2012 22:59:13 -0700 (PDT), Tommy Joe
>><jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote:
>>
>>>On Jun 22, 9:26 pm, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>>"Pico Rico" <PicoR...@nonospam.com> wrote in message
>>>
>>>
>>>> no, that would mean the hummus was killed.
>>>
>>>
>>>> > So, "hummicide" happens when you make it well, and there is nothing
>>>> > left
>>>> > because your guests killed it.
>>>
>>>
>>> I don't care for pun humor, it's juvenile and boring. In fact, I
>>>think that people who resort to using it should be punished.
>>>
>>>TJ
>>
>>It takes some intellectual ability to appreciate a good pun. I never
>>could understand the appeal of the Three Stooges.
>
> They were way ahead of their time... the Three Stooges schtick wasn't
> much different from usenet... just a different medium. They were
> actually more informative on an intellectual basis and as farce
> certainly more entertaining. Many of those old time cine comic
> personalities were better at their craft than any of today's. The
> Three Stooges and their contemporaries had real talent, proven by your
> remembering. The Three Stooges left such an indelible mark on society
> that they will never be forgotten.

(snippage)


They're very popular. They recently made a full length movie featuring the
"new" Stooges. Some people think women couldn't possibly like the Stooges.
I always did. I used to get up on Saturday mornings as a kid and watch
reruns of the Stooges. I love slapstick comedy :) Remember Pete Smith's
black & white comedy/docudrama reels from the 30's? "Oh, no! What have
they gotten themselves into now?" LOL Of course I wasn't alive then but I
still occasionally see the shorts on classic movie channels. Great stuff.

Jill

[Ed Pawlowski]

On Sat, 23 Jun 2012 12:06:17 -0400, "Somebody"
<tom.un...@gmail.com> wrote:



>>
>> It takes some intellectual ability to appreciate a good pun. I never
>> could understand the appeal of the Three Stooges.
>
>
>You've never pushed a pie in someone's face? Or had a food-fight?
>

No, I guess I'm boring in that respect.

[Somebody]

"Ed Pawlowski" <e...@snet.net> wrote in message

news:9mrbu75omm8alamqn...@4ax.com...

come on, try it sometime. Then maybe you will appreciate the Stooges.

I like how the Stooges changed with times and teamed up with Iggy Pop in the
70s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4hPnZUMBwA

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:5141f5b6-8c35-4ba0...@h20g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...

-----

The Dali Lama was visiting New York City and kinda hungry and passes an
Italian restaurant. He goes in and sees pizza on the menu, and asks the
waiter: can you make me one with everything.

[Gary]

Somebody wrote:

> The Dali Lama was visiting New York City and kinda hungry and passes an
> Italian restaurant. He goes in and sees pizza on the menu, and asks the
> waiter: can you make me one with everything.

Ummm... please explain that (pun or joke) to me. I don't get it.

:-O

[George M. Middius]

You must be Curly.

[A Moose in Love]

On Jun 22, 9:20 pm, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Would that be considered "hummiside"?

Had it been Raymond Burr, it would have been 'ironside.'

[Gary]

Maybe. Or I'm just plain clueless. If there is a joke to that, it went over
my head. ;o

[Somebody]

"Gary" <g.ma...@att.net> wrote in message news:4FE619B4...@att.net...

It is funny if you are playing to a Buddhist crowd. Reincarnates them!

aummm.... maybe I should have capitalized "Everything"

[George M. Middius]

Confucius say: You are one with nothing.

[Gary]

If I'm not mistaken, Confucius also said, "He who knows all, knows nothing."
That's one of my favorite quotes as I witness this 'know it all' thing on a
daily basis. And the 'know it all' people are arrogant dumbasses that will
never improve themselves since they already think that they know it all.

I'm always open to learn something new each day.

Gary

[George M. Middius]

Gary wrote:

> > > > You must be Curly.
> > >
> > > Maybe. Or I'm just plain clueless. If there is a joke to that, it went over
> > > my head. ;o
> >
> > Confucius say: You are one with nothing.
>
> If I'm not mistaken, Confucius also said, "He who knows all, knows nothing."
> That's one of my favorite quotes as I witness this 'know it all' thing on a
> daily basis. And the 'know it all' people are arrogant dumbasses that will
> never improve themselves since they already think that they know it all.

Is there no topic known to man that you cannot dumb down into dirt?

[Somebody]

"Gary" <g.ma...@att.net> wrote in message news:4FE63F22...@att.net...

I like the cut of your jib.

[Ed Pawlowski]

On Sat, 23 Jun 2012 13:07:14 -0400, "Somebody"
<tom.un...@gmail.com> wrote:



>>>
>>>
>>>You've never pushed a pie in someone's face? Or had a food-fight?
>>>
>>
>> No, I guess I'm boring in that respect.
>
>
>come on, try it sometime. Then maybe you will appreciate the Stooges.
>

I don't see how that is funny. Sorry, I have no desire to try it. I
like humor, I read the comics, I can enjoy a good comedian if he has
good subject manner. I dislike Don Rickles. I used to like Jonathan
Winters and Robin Williams if he is not overly vulgar.

As for a pie in the face, I also fail to see how it is funny when a
bride or groom smears the other with cake. IMO, it is just being
disrespectful of the other. There may be a place for whipped cream in
the bedroom though.

[Doug Freyburger]

One of the goals of Buddhism is to acheive one-ness with the universe.
"Please make me One with Everything" is a joke take on that goal.

Variations on the joke are a Zen master asking for a hot dog, the
Shaolin priest character from Kung Fu (Taoist not Buddhist) asking the
same.

[Somebody]

"Doug Freyburger" <dfre...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:js64uc$cmk$1...@dont-email.me...

Next in line at the pizza joint was a nihilist, she said: make me one with
nothing.

[Somebody]

"Ed Pawlowski" <e...@snet.net> wrote in message

news:tn4du79lk6rk6mmlf...@4ax.com...

How do you get that out of the sheets and bedding?

I hate when the bide/groom do the cake in the face thing. It makes me
wince. That seems forced. Literally. Whereas the pie in a face-- when
timed right-- is unexpected. Timing is everything.

I don't like comedians that just swear for the sake of swearing. Seems
prevalent today. I wonder if that will be the next trend in cooking shows.

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 23, 9:24 am, Ed Pawlowski <e...@snet.net> wrote:

> It takes some intellectual ability to appreciate a good pun.  I never
> could understand the appeal of the Three Stooges.

I don't remember them much for their puns, more the physical
stuff, some of which I liked. I always like the grumpy guy who thinks
he's in charge, like Moe with the 3 Stooges. With Laurel and Hardy, I
preferred Hardy - he was always steaming and ready to explode - same
as Jackie Gleason playing the part of the easily stressed about to
explode guy next to Art Carney who riled up Gleason without even
trying. I liked Abbot over Costello too. The boiling, about to
explode, yet holding it in as long as they can types - that's the
humor I see in the stooges and some of the others. I even see it in
the tv show Breaking Bad - in it's infancy it was a modern version of
Laurel and Hardy almost, the way the meth making teacher and his
supposedly street wise partner clashed all the time. Very funny stuff
not labeled as humor but humor non the fucking less.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 23, 11:12 am, Brooklyn1 <Gravesend1> wrote:

> They were way ahead of their time... the Three Stooges schtick wasn't
> much different from usenet... just a different medium.  They were
> actually more informative on an intellectual basis and as farce
> certainly more entertaining.

The so called relevant comics of our time like Pryor and Woody
Allen and George Carlin, to me they weren't any more relevant than
Jackie Vernon or Professor Irwin Corey or more recently Vic Dunlop,
who I believe died recently. A guy like Pryor was not so relevant as
people think. I remember his stuff, most of it was sex oriented and
kind of boring. The guy was good technically, but I didn't like his
material. Only truly intelligent people are able to see the true
relevance in the humor of people who are not considered relevant and
sometimes considered in fact the complete opposite. I thought
Professor Irwin Corey was way more relevant than Pryor any day of the
week.

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:621ce1ca-6bba-4b4b...@8g2000yql.googlegroups.com...

---

does he have a youtube channel?

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 23, 6:11 pm, Gary <g.maj...@att.net> wrote:

> If I'm not mistaken, Confucius also said, "He who knows all, knows nothing."
> That's one of my favorite quotes as I witness this 'know it all' thing on a
> daily basis. And the 'know it all' people are arrogant dumbasses that will
> never improve themselves since they already think that they know it all.
>
> I'm always open to learn something new each day.

Bullshit, man - there's no way on earth you know more than me. I
am open to nothing because I already know everything. Although I do
forget a few things from time to time. So in that case is it ok if I
ask a question now and then without you throwing my "I know
everything" comment in my face?

I want to know everything, but I'm sick of learning
TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:6cb19820-8809-4b45...@m24g2000yqh.googlegroups.com...

---

I hadn't thought of them as Laurel and Hardy, but early on yes. Interesting
insight. +5 points. But -1 for using the F word gratuitously. So net +4

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 24, 12:15 am, Ed Pawlowski <e...@snet.net> wrote:

> I don't see how that is funny.  Sorry,  I have no desire to try it.  I
> like humor, I read the comics, I can enjoy a good comedian if he has
> good subject manner.  I dislike Don Rickles. I used to like Jonathan
> Winters and Robin Williams if he is not overly vulgar.
>
> As for a pie in the face, I also fail to see how it is funny when a
> bride or groom smears the other with cake.  IMO, it is just being
> disrespectful of the other.  There may be a place for whipped cream in
> the bedroom though.

For me the best humor always comes without the humor label. It can
be found in anything. And I mean "anything".

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 24, 10:52 am, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:

> Next in line at the pizza joint was a nihilist, she said:  make me one with
> nothing.

And right behind the nihilist was a guy who can't make up his own
mind, so he said, "Give me one with everything on one side and nothing
on the other." And right behind him was a guy who was sick of hearing
all the specialized requests causing a hold up in the line that was
irritating a lot of people. The guy growls, "Give me one with
everything on it and make it free or I'll blow your fucking head off
till your neck looks like a pizza tree" - before turning to face those
behind him and adding, "And that goes for everybody in the joint if
you give me any shit, dig it?"

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:c0357d52-2b76-497c...@h20g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...

---

what the heck is a pizza tree?

[Nunya Bidnits]

Pico Rico <Pico...@nonospam.com> wrote:
> "Somebody" <tom.un...@gmail.com> wrote in message
> news:js35l9$9eu$1...@dont-email.me...

>> Would that be considered "hummiside"?
>>
>

> not, that would mean the hummus was killed.

>
> So, "hummicide" happens when you make it well, and there is nothing
> left because your guests killed it.

But if "Somebody" ate it and died, it would indeed be pesticide.

[Nunya Bidnits]

Or straight through it, with the resulting damage accounting for your
inability to grasp the joke.

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 25, 2:22 am, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:

> I hadn't thought of them as Laurel and Hardy, but early on yes.  Interesting
> insight.  +5 points.  But -1 for using the F word gratuitously.  So net +4

I'll take it. Yes, I thought of Laurel and Hardy in many scenes in
which Jesse and Mr. White were arguing or in a pickle of some kind.
Even better than L&H in a way because the humor was unlabeled. I like
unlabeled humor. There's a tv show - 30 Rock - on every night - sure
you've seen it. Now I'm not saying it's hilarious, but even when it's
somewhat enjoyable writing-wise, I just can't get past the stupid
music they slather onto scenes. It's insulting really, like playing
funny music behind a scene to let the people know it's ok to laugh
now. But even worse, the music sucks and it doesn't ebb and flow,
it's just slathered on. I've seen this on a number of tv shows I
might otherwise enjoy, but can't tolerate them at all because of the
music. I hate it so much that I even begin to hate people who aren't
bothered by it. Insensitive people make me want to kill.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 25, 2:32 am, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:

> what the heck is a pizza tree?

It's like, you're a tree and your head is the top of the tree.
When the head is sliced off, the red and white splotched gobs of body
liquid that squirt from your opened neck will look like a pizza after
10 seconds in a Ninja Food Processor. The top of the tree will be
gone, but your trunk-tough torso will still be there, dancing mindless
to the beat of life's finality.

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:ee23018a-8bcd-40be...@m8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com...

---

I like the shows without laugh tracks. Like Community, the Office, Breaking
Bad, Louie, Wilfred, Parks and Rec. When you've been watching a show
without a laugh track and then watch one that has one, I find it jarring and
makes me like the show less.

I've seen 30 Rock and like it but it's a show I can take or leave. I like
it when it's on.

[Tommy Joe]

On Jun 26, 1:40 pm, "Somebody" <tom.ungvar...@gmail.com> wrote:

> I've seen 30 Rock and like it but it's a show I can take or leave.  I like
> it when it's on.

Maybe this is a bit narrow on my part, but I feel strongly about
it. Not only do I hate that slathered on music they use on 30 Rock
and Monk and a bunch of other shows - even more so I resent the people
who don't hate it. I really do. Someone has to be pretty insensitive
to not be aware of that slathered-on needless music and other sounds
to help us understand what's happening. It's insane. Someone gets
out of their chair and there's a noise to denote that. That's
annoying too, but I'm referring even more so to music that serves no
purpose other than to be there. When I tell people about it and I
have to explain it to them, I know I'm wasting my time, they've
already been brainwashed. Seinfeld had a laugh track, or an audience
that is prompted to laugh, a softer version of the laugh track I
suppose - but I liked that show and thought it was very well written
with actors well chosen for their parts. As a rule though, yes, I
find comedy more in non comedy things than in labeled or packaged
comedy.

TJ