info
Google Groups no longer supports new Usenet posts or subscriptions. Historical content remains viewable.
Dismiss
Free Popcorn in Heaven!?
6 views
Skip to first unread message
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 17, 2016, 4:35:17 PM8/17/16
to
What do you think people will eat in Heaven? It would be something cheap and light. It'll be free because nobody will have to work. It may be conditional upon worshiping God, but that's another matter. God's love won't be unconditional.
Popcorn sounds like the perfect heavenly food. It doesn't need cooking or special attention to regional diversity. All races eat popcorn.
Eating popcorn --which I always take on my bike-- makes me a strong contender for acceptance to the heavenly kingdom.
Never mind eating pork.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Fix it, or face the music!"
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nffbCR_uCZ6znjf3gLiFRXSAoLzhWtoZ6U4S7Y37aKc/edit?usp=sharing
Popcorn sounds like the perfect heavenly food. It doesn't need cooking or special attention to regional diversity. All races eat popcorn.
Eating popcorn --which I always take on my bike-- makes me a strong contender for acceptance to the heavenly kingdom.
Never mind eating pork.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Fix it, or face the music!"
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nffbCR_uCZ6znjf3gLiFRXSAoLzhWtoZ6U4S7Y37aKc/edit?usp=sharing
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 17, 2016, 11:38:57 PM8/17/16
to
On Wednesday, August 17, 2016 at 6:05:09 PM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> In article <b1090ff1-6638-4f69...@googlegroups.com>,
> Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
> drinks (non-alcoholic) at Hoyts cinemas here in New Zealand and
> Australia if you pay for the over-priced LUX "cinema experience"
> tickets.
>
> Besides, popcorn is tasteless cardboard crap. If there really was a
> mythical Heaven, then everyone would freely get whatever their own
> favourite foods were.
It couldn't be meat though as there no death in the kingdom of heaven.
Everybody grazing on grass would make all "happy as a cow." 😐
> In article <b1090ff1-6638-4f69...@googlegroups.com>,
> Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
> <thetibet...@gmail.com> wrote:
> >
> > What do you think people will eat in Heaven? It would be something cheap and
> > light. It'll be free because nobody will have to work. It may be conditional
> > upon worshiping God, but that's another matter. God's love won't be
> > unconditional.
> >
> > Popcorn sounds like the perfect heavenly food. It doesn't need cooking or
> > special attention to regional diversity. All races eat popcorn.
> >
> > Eating popcorn --which I always take on my bike-- makes me a strong contender
> > for acceptance to the heavenly kingdom.
> >
> > Never mind eating pork.
>
> Who needs the mythical Heaven for that. You can get free popcorn and
> >
> > What do you think people will eat in Heaven? It would be something cheap and
> > light. It'll be free because nobody will have to work. It may be conditional
> > upon worshiping God, but that's another matter. God's love won't be
> > unconditional.
> >
> > Popcorn sounds like the perfect heavenly food. It doesn't need cooking or
> > special attention to regional diversity. All races eat popcorn.
> >
> > Eating popcorn --which I always take on my bike-- makes me a strong contender
> > for acceptance to the heavenly kingdom.
> >
> > Never mind eating pork.
>
> drinks (non-alcoholic) at Hoyts cinemas here in New Zealand and
> Australia if you pay for the over-priced LUX "cinema experience"
> tickets.
>
> Besides, popcorn is tasteless cardboard crap. If there really was a
> mythical Heaven, then everyone would freely get whatever their own
> favourite foods were.
It couldn't be meat though as there no death in the kingdom of heaven.
Everybody grazing on grass would make all "happy as a cow." 😐
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 18, 2016, 1:33:03 AM8/18/16
to
On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 12:17:09 AM UTC-4, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> On Wednesday, August 17, 2016 at 11:55:19 PM UTC-4, Astero...@yahoo.com wrote:
> > that's very good as popcorn isn't an unnatural creation. it was discovered when some popped on their own on a very hot day. popcorn was meant to pop, and was meant to be found. we'll be eating popcorn forever.
> >
>
> You must also believe that god created tobacco and it was meant to be found and smoked.
Oh yes, there will be a lot of smoking in Heaven. No death and nothing to do calls for chain-smoking.
> On Wednesday, August 17, 2016 at 11:55:19 PM UTC-4, Astero...@yahoo.com wrote:
> > that's very good as popcorn isn't an unnatural creation. it was discovered when some popped on their own on a very hot day. popcorn was meant to pop, and was meant to be found. we'll be eating popcorn forever.
> >
>
> You must also believe that god created tobacco and it was meant to be found and smoked.
Oh yes, there will be a lot of smoking in Heaven. No death and nothing to do calls for chain-smoking.
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 18, 2016, 9:57:05 AM8/18/16
to
On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 9:38:39 AM UTC-4, Astero...@yahoo.com wrote:
Wrong, nothing more natural than smoking weed and making hallucinogenic concoctions. That's how the Bible was inspired.
It was bad weed though. Bob Marley was the man that reached for the heavens.
> On Wednesday, August 17, 2016 at 9:17:09 PM UTC-7, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > You must also believe that god created tobacco and it was meant to be found and smoked.
>
> no, I don't believe that. it's natural that popcorn pops. it's natural that things burn. it's not natural to take something that is burning and to inhale the smoke. what if an animal dropping caught on fire, would someone pick that up to inhale it?
> > You must also believe that god created tobacco and it was meant to be found and smoked.
>
Wrong, nothing more natural than smoking weed and making hallucinogenic concoctions. That's how the Bible was inspired.
It was bad weed though. Bob Marley was the man that reached for the heavens.
Free Spirit, Chief of Quixotic Enterprises
Aug 18, 2016, 12:24:03 PM8/18/16
to
On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 11:49:32 AM UTC-4, Free Spirit, Chief of Quixotic Enterprises wrote:
> On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 11:33:42 AM UTC-4, John Locke wrote:
> > On Thu, 18 Aug 2016 03:00:55 -0700 (PDT), Malcolm McMahon
> > <malcol...@googlemail.com> wrote:
> > >in the Cinema it's having someone with a bucket of popcorn in the next seat.
> > >
> > ...the crap they call "butter" that they put on the
> > popcorn doesn't help.
>
> No, it doesn't. I think it's "Jesus Margarine." God knows what's in it.
One problem with Heaven is boredom. Knitting doesn't turn me on.
I suspect a major pastime is spanking the donkey.
> On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 11:33:42 AM UTC-4, John Locke wrote:
> > On Thu, 18 Aug 2016 03:00:55 -0700 (PDT), Malcolm McMahon
> > <malcol...@googlemail.com> wrote:
> >
> > >On Wednesday, 17 August 2016 21:31:44 UTC+1, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > >> What do you think people will eat in Heaven? It would be something cheap and light. It'll be free because nobody will have to work. It may be conditional upon worshiping God, but that's another matter. God's love won't be unconditional.
> > >>
> > >> Popcorn sounds like the perfect heavenly food. It doesn't need cooking or special attention to regional diversity. All races eat popcorn.
> > >>
> > >
> > >Personally I find the smell of popcorn slightly nauseating. If there's one thing I dread
> > >On Wednesday, 17 August 2016 21:31:44 UTC+1, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > >> What do you think people will eat in Heaven? It would be something cheap and light. It'll be free because nobody will have to work. It may be conditional upon worshiping God, but that's another matter. God's love won't be unconditional.
> > >>
> > >> Popcorn sounds like the perfect heavenly food. It doesn't need cooking or special attention to regional diversity. All races eat popcorn.
> > >>
> > >
> > >in the Cinema it's having someone with a bucket of popcorn in the next seat.
> > >
> > ...the crap they call "butter" that they put on the
> > popcorn doesn't help.
>
> No, it doesn't. I think it's "Jesus Margarine." God knows what's in it.
One problem with Heaven is boredom. Knitting doesn't turn me on.
I suspect a major pastime is spanking the donkey.
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 19, 2016, 10:05:46 AM8/19/16
to
On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 5:50:59 PM UTC-4, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> I play music loud to bring attention to my campaign. Perhaps they played drums and flute or something similar. Yes, the Christians are taking advantage of it:
>
> http://www.zazzle.com/i_heart_jesus_flutes_tee_shirt-235846242156593527
Let's analyze the logic behind the Christians: "I love Jesus and flutes!?" What's that? It doesn't make sense.
Look at what kind of PR I can do for Heaven:
http://www.zazzle.com/spanking_the_donkey_shirt-235920757759091248?CMPN=shareicon&lang=en&social=true&view=113083556601716944&rf=238111090634717809
People will be spanking the donkey in Heaven, thus avoiding boredom and frustration. It's a harmless way to spend Eternity, right?
> I play music loud to bring attention to my campaign. Perhaps they played drums and flute or something similar. Yes, the Christians are taking advantage of it:
>
> http://www.zazzle.com/i_heart_jesus_flutes_tee_shirt-235846242156593527
Let's analyze the logic behind the Christians: "I love Jesus and flutes!?" What's that? It doesn't make sense.
Look at what kind of PR I can do for Heaven:
http://www.zazzle.com/spanking_the_donkey_shirt-235920757759091248?CMPN=shareicon&lang=en&social=true&view=113083556601716944&rf=238111090634717809
People will be spanking the donkey in Heaven, thus avoiding boredom and frustration. It's a harmless way to spend Eternity, right?
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 19, 2016, 8:14:46 PM8/19/16
to
On Friday, August 19, 2016 at 7:25:59 PM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> In article <97f1eb6e-70c7-4ccf...@googlegroups.com>,
>
> > On Friday, August 19, 2016 at 2:29:52 AM UTC-4, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
> > Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > > On Friday, August 19, 2016 at 2:10:42 AM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> > > > In article <e8c972bb-9933-4680...@googlegroups.com>,
> > > > > On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 10:18:00 PM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> > > > > > In article <dcc41f9f-9ea6-4327...@googlegroups.com>,
> > > > > > > I find it amazing Jesus was able to draw crowds without singing or
> > > > > > > dancing.
> > > > > > > Perhaps everybody ignored him. Some Michael Jackson steps would have
> > > > > > > helped.
> > > > > > story book and they can do anything: Harry Potter can cast spells,
> > > > > > Luke Skywalker can use the Force, the rabbits in Watership Down can
> > > > > > talk, Superman is almost invincible, ...
> > > > >
> > > > > If he made the fish jump into the nets and turned water into wine, he
> > > > > would draw a crowd.
> > > > >
> > > > > Churches give "free handouts" to attract a crowd.
> > > >
> > > > You've got that backwards ... the Church expects free handouts from
> > > > their faithful sheep followers. That's why they hand round a plate for
> > > > "donations". (In ye olde days the Church simply stole what they
> > > > wanted.)
> > > >
> > > > One of the conmen "priests" (self-appointed) here in New Zealand goes
> > > > cons the poorer people in the community and then goes out and buys
> > > > expensive houses and cars for himself. :-\
> > > >
> > > > Another conman-run company here that makes breakfast cereals claims to
> > > > be a "religious organisation" so they can get out of paying income
> > > > taxes.
> > >
> > > Well, churches get donations and then hand out some to the homeless and
> > > indigent.
> > >
> > > They do attract the very poor for that reason.
> >
> > Mind you, they channel the small change to the poor, but keep a big chunk
> > in their pockets. It's big business.
>
> Much of what the Church hands out (such as food parcels, etc.) is
> donated by businesses or individuals, so they don't actually pay for
> that either. The church also makes more money by selling some of the
> donated items in their charity shops.
>
> That (and the lack of paying any tax) is why many modern churches are
> quite often big buildings on large land areas.
"Whoever controls the food, controls the jungle"
> In article <97f1eb6e-70c7-4ccf...@googlegroups.com>,
> Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
> <thetibet...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > On Friday, August 19, 2016 at 2:29:52 AM UTC-4, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
> > Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > > On Friday, August 19, 2016 at 2:10:42 AM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> > > > In article <e8c972bb-9933-4680...@googlegroups.com>,
> > > > Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
> > > > <thetibet...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > > > > On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 10:18:00 PM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> > > > > > In article <dcc41f9f-9ea6-4327...@googlegroups.com>,
> > > > > > Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
> > > > > > <thetibet...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > > > > > > I find it amazing Jesus was able to draw crowds without singing or
> > > > > > > dancing.
> > > > > > > Perhaps everybody ignored him. Some Michael Jackson steps would have
> > > > > > > helped.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > I play music loud to bring attention to my campaign. Perhaps they
> > > > > > > played drums and flute or something similar. Yes, the Christians
> > > > > > > are taking advantage of it:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Jesus didn't draw crowds ... he's just a fictional character in a
> > > > > > > I play music loud to bring attention to my campaign. Perhaps they
> > > > > > > played drums and flute or something similar. Yes, the Christians
> > > > > > > are taking advantage of it:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > story book and they can do anything: Harry Potter can cast spells,
> > > > > > Luke Skywalker can use the Force, the rabbits in Watership Down can
> > > > > > talk, Superman is almost invincible, ...
> > > > >
> > > > > If he made the fish jump into the nets and turned water into wine, he
> > > > > would draw a crowd.
> > > > >
> > > > > Churches give "free handouts" to attract a crowd.
> > > >
> > > > You've got that backwards ... the Church expects free handouts from
> > > > their faithful sheep followers. That's why they hand round a plate for
> > > > "donations". (In ye olde days the Church simply stole what they
> > > > wanted.)
> > > >
> > > > One of the conmen "priests" (self-appointed) here in New Zealand goes
> > > > cons the poorer people in the community and then goes out and buys
> > > > expensive houses and cars for himself. :-\
> > > >
> > > > Another conman-run company here that makes breakfast cereals claims to
> > > > be a "religious organisation" so they can get out of paying income
> > > > taxes.
> > >
> > > Well, churches get donations and then hand out some to the homeless and
> > > indigent.
> > >
> > > They do attract the very poor for that reason.
> >
> > Mind you, they channel the small change to the poor, but keep a big chunk
> > in their pockets. It's big business.
>
> Much of what the Church hands out (such as food parcels, etc.) is
> donated by businesses or individuals, so they don't actually pay for
> that either. The church also makes more money by selling some of the
> donated items in their charity shops.
>
> That (and the lack of paying any tax) is why many modern churches are
> quite often big buildings on large land areas.
"Whoever controls the food, controls the jungle"
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 23, 2016, 1:15:10 PM8/23/16
to
On Tuesday, August 23, 2016 at 8:06:49 AM UTC-4, Astero...@yahoo.com wrote:
> On Tuesday, August 23, 2016 at 4:49:49 AM UTC-7, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > On Tuesday, August 23, 2016 at 12:25:09 AM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> > > In article <d26362a1-983d-4cb6...@googlegroups.com>,
> > > > On Monday, August 22, 2016 at 10:10:15 PM UTC-4, Kurt wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > Paul slaughtered all the others, "men and women" "every house" "put to
> > > > > death" "until none were left to preach" and the few he didn't kill, he
> > > > > spit hatred at, called fools and said he never learned anything from them.
> > > > > And as a matter of fact, never ever apologized for slaughering them, or
> > > > > said it was wrong, in fact, he bragged about it, pointed out he was strong
> > > > > and they were weak, when in competition with them.
> > > > >
> > > > > If he converted, what the hell did it convert to, it was totally alien to
> > > > > the disciples and brothers of Jesus, who remained his enemies to the end.
> > > > >
> > > > > Yeah, shows up in Jerusalem, James dies, the Clementine Literature says
> > > > > Paul did it, then shows up in Rome and Peter dies. Followers of Jesus
> > > > > dropped like flies everywhere he went.
> > > >
> > > > Too much tragedy in the Bible and no comedy. 毨
> > > >
> > > > Jesus could have told a few jokes.
> > >
> > > Religion is one big joke ... played by the priests on all the brainless
> > > sheep that actually believe it.
> >
> > It would be a cruel joke.
> >
> > People live and die waiting for Jesus. 😐
>
> there's no cruel joke. the cruelty is from those who do not believe.
Hey, it's not nice to make people wait 2000 years for pizza delivery. 👎
http://bananapoop.com/zextra/imgs/jokes/big11/jesus-deliver-us-pizza-delivery-grains-are-bad.jpg
> On Tuesday, August 23, 2016 at 4:49:49 AM UTC-7, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> > On Tuesday, August 23, 2016 at 12:25:09 AM UTC-4, Your Name wrote:
> > > In article <d26362a1-983d-4cb6...@googlegroups.com>,
> > > > On Monday, August 22, 2016 at 10:10:15 PM UTC-4, Kurt wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > Paul slaughtered all the others, "men and women" "every house" "put to
> > > > > death" "until none were left to preach" and the few he didn't kill, he
> > > > > spit hatred at, called fools and said he never learned anything from them.
> > > > > And as a matter of fact, never ever apologized for slaughering them, or
> > > > > said it was wrong, in fact, he bragged about it, pointed out he was strong
> > > > > and they were weak, when in competition with them.
> > > > >
> > > > > If he converted, what the hell did it convert to, it was totally alien to
> > > > > the disciples and brothers of Jesus, who remained his enemies to the end.
> > > > >
> > > > > Yeah, shows up in Jerusalem, James dies, the Clementine Literature says
> > > > > Paul did it, then shows up in Rome and Peter dies. Followers of Jesus
> > > > > dropped like flies everywhere he went.
> > > >
> > > > Too much tragedy in the Bible and no comedy. 毨
> > > >
> > > > Jesus could have told a few jokes.
> > >
> > > Religion is one big joke ... played by the priests on all the brainless
> > > sheep that actually believe it.
> >
> > It would be a cruel joke.
> >
> > People live and die waiting for Jesus. 😐
>
> there's no cruel joke. the cruelty is from those who do not believe.
Hey, it's not nice to make people wait 2000 years for pizza delivery. 👎
http://bananapoop.com/zextra/imgs/jokes/big11/jesus-deliver-us-pizza-delivery-grains-are-bad.jpg
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
Aug 24, 2016, 9:02:04 PM8/24/16
to
On Wednesday, August 24, 2016 at 7:30:23 PM UTC-4, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher wrote:
> On Wednesday, August 24, 2016 at 6:48:05 PM UTC-4, Kurt wrote:
> > The Place of Light. Jesus goes to the Place of Light.
> >
> > Jesus lives on in the Many Worlds of the Kingdom of the Father, always has, always will.
>
> A place of light? It must be the Sun.
>
> Jesus lives there among the pharaohs.
I have different plans for the afterlife. I won't need a place of light, but I'll be needing a beach with coconut trees and a couple of angels to massage my back. Of course, I need my beach cruiser as well.
All those who follow my movement will get the same treatment too. 👍
> On Wednesday, August 24, 2016 at 6:48:05 PM UTC-4, Kurt wrote:
> > The Place of Light. Jesus goes to the Place of Light.
> >
> > Jesus lives on in the Many Worlds of the Kingdom of the Father, always has, always will.
>
> A place of light? It must be the Sun.
>
> Jesus lives there among the pharaohs.
I have different plans for the afterlife. I won't need a place of light, but I'll be needing a beach with coconut trees and a couple of angels to massage my back. Of course, I need my beach cruiser as well.
All those who follow my movement will get the same treatment too. 👍
0 new messages