YEP , you too can become a muslim in a few minutes
kangarooistan
Among the beauties of Islam is the fact that in this religion there
are no intermediaries in the relationship between a person and his
Lord.
Entering this religion does not involve any special ceremonies or
procedures that need to be done in front of any other person, nor
does
it require the consent of any specific people.
Becoming Muslim is very easy and anyone can do it even if he is all
alone in the desert or in a locked room.
All it takes is to say two
beautiful sentences which sum up the meaning of Islam and which
include the statement that a person is submits himself to Him and
recognizes that He is his God and Helper and Protector Who decrees
for
him whatever He wills; and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah
whom he must follow with regard to what was revealed to him from
Allah, for obeying the Messenger is part of obeying Allah.
>From this it should be clear that one can become a Muslim straight
away, so he gets up, has a shower and says: "Ash-hadu an la ilaha
ill-
Allah wa ash-hadu anna Muhammadan 'abduhu wa rasooluhu (I bear
witness
that there is no god except Allah and I bear witness that Muhammad is
His Messenger)."
The Arabic word Allah means God (the one and only true God who
created
the whole universe). This word Allah is a name for God, which is used
by Arabic speakers, both Arab Muslims and Arab Christians.
Whoever utters these twin statements of faith, with conviction and
believing in them, becomes a Muslim, sharing all the rights and
duties
that other Muslims have.
The one who wants to utter the twin testimony of faith may simply
utter the words with his tongue, and that is sufficient for him to
enter Islam without having witnesses present.
If he does not pronounce the twin testimony of faith and enter Islam,
we cannot say that he is a Muslim, even if he admired Islam and
recognized that it is the best religion, a great religion, and so on.
Abu Talib, the uncle of the Prophet Muhammad died a kafir
(unbeliever), and Allah forbade His Prophet to pray for forgiveness
for him, even though he used to defend the Prophet Muhammad and said
in his poems:
"I do know that the religion of Muhammad is better than all other
religions of mankind;
Were it not for fear of blame or slander, you would find me accepting
it completely."
If a person accepts Islam out of conviction, and begins to practise
it, then he is a Muslim, even if he does not register his Islam
officially, or go to a court or Islamic centre to obtain
documentation, or announce it to others. If such a person dies, then
Muslims hope for Paradise for him and pray for mercy for him.
After that the new Muslim can start straight away to do the things
that Allah has made obligatory, such as the five daily prayers at the
right times, fasting during the month of Ramadan, and so on.
Click here for a list of Islamic links
kangarooistan
R D S
"kangarooistan" <kangar...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1180560475.5...@h2g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
> It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
>
Well if you can't beat 'em...
kangarooistan
> "kangarooistan" <kangaroois...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>
> news:1180560475.5...@h2g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
>
> > It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
>
> Well if you can't beat 'em...
If you do the numbers you will see over 100,000 more muslims every DAY
Nothing on earth can stop ISLAM now , in fact if you ask historians
about what happens when a religion is oppressed it grows twice as fast
Like when christianty swallowed the ROMAN empire despite the
difference in size and power , to oppress any religion is like trying
to ban or daemonize a book or a movie , the masses are drawn it in
droves
Islam has grown steadily for 1428 years , never so fast as in the last
5 years
NOTHNG can stop it now
kanga
=====
Grey
"kangarooistan" <kangar...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1180560475.5...@h2g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
Who would want to?
G
kangarooistan
> "kangarooistan" <kangaroois...@gmail.com> wrote in message
Millions who seek truth and justice
www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Islam_by_country
kanga
=====
simple_...@yahoo.com
names including: kangarooistan, Burhan, Farid Ahmed, Kope, Death to
Israel..Israel has no Right to Exist, Franko Pizza, rick murphy, rich
murphy, ISLAM - THE SOLUTION OF MODERN PROBLEMS, Faris Jawad,
Sabastawi, The Founding Church, Ilan Ramon: Kike Lost in Space.
Proudly serving Islam and al Quds, Katrina, Ahura Mazda, TROLLS
HUNTER, Kayid Al-Kuffar, Firnando, R Geovani, Blondes Gaulloises,
Zimbawi, Muslims Always Victorious, Islam Will Replace Collapsing
Amerikan Empire, Muslims Are Good Folks, Katucha, katucha is the
zionists worst nightmare, We are Muslims, and we are extremely proud
of it, Born To Serve Islam, All praise is due to Allah Lord of the
Worlds, the Owner of all of the creation, Ardalan Keykavoussi, Tommy
Davis, arash...@yahoo.com, pislam, kaye...@gmail.com, LORD RAMA,
The President of yaako.com.
Lord Turkey Cough
Not even President Bush joininig up?
>
> kanga
> =====
>
>
atec 7 7
Seth
Grey <grah...@btinternet.com> wrote:
>"kangarooistan" <kangar...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>news:1180560475.5...@h2g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
>> It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
>Who would want to?
A kidnapping victim with a gun pointed at him.
Seth
Andy
Or some poor unfortunate bastard kidnapped by murderous muslim scum,
while having a knife held to his throat and about to lose his head so
muslim terrorists can chant like the fucking retards they are and make
videos of the event to masturbate over their disgusting acts for years
to come..
Those are the sort of criminals that the retarded Kanga hypocritical
idiot sings praises about and wants to bring up his "babies" to be
just like them. Go figure..
Ex convict criminals like Kangarooistan are a perfect example why
mandatory sterilisation and genital mutilation should occur in prisons
for perpetrators of certain crimes, so that hate mongering fuckwits
just Kanga could never again reproduce and continue polluting the
human gene pool.
Sterilising the whole fucking muslim race would be an even bigger
bonus as it would save muslim women from fearing being stoned to death
for daring to allow themselves to be raped. Muslim children would no
longer be subjected to sexual abuse because idiotic muslim law allows
pedophiles to fuck children too.
Yep, they should all have their nuts and cocks cut off I say.. would
create a win win situation all round.
HTH
>Seth
Maxwell
> It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
>
> Among the beauties of Islam is the fact that in this religion there
> are no intermediaries in the relationship between a person and his
> Lord.
>
>
> Entering this religion does not involve any special ceremonies or
> procedures that need to be done in front of any other person, nor
> does
> it require the consent of any specific people.
>
>
> Becoming Muslim is very easy and anyone can do it even if he is all
> alone in the desert or in a locked room.
Sure, all you have to do first is divest yourself of all reason--but
anyone considering becoming a Muslim (or believing any religious
superstition) probably won't have much reason to begin with.
kangarooistan
John Graeme
> On May 31, 6:27 am, kangarooistan <kangaroois...@gmail.com> wrote:
> It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
>
> Among the beauties of Islam is the fact that in this religion there
> are no intermediaries in the relationship between a person and his
> Lord.
>
> Entering this religion does not involve any special ceremonies or
> procedures that need to be done in front of any other person, nor
> does
> it require the consent of any specific people.
>
> Becoming Muslim is very easy and anyone can do it even if he is all
> alone in the desert or in a locked room.
First, hit yourself in the head with a hammer until you've attained
the stupidity necessary to believe that drivel.
Seriously, do you really believe that crap? It's hard to believe that
any literate person could take that nonsense seriously. But I guess
many people have an almost infinite capacity for self-deception.
Andy
<kangar...@gmail.com> wrote:
[ ~garbage~ ]
Everyone should remember the poor unfortunate bastard kidnapped by
murderous muslim scum, while having a knife held to his throat and
about to lose his head so muslim terrorists can chant like the fucking
retards they are and make videos of the event to masturbate over their
disgusting acts for years to come..
Those are the sort of criminals that the retarded Kanga hypocritical
idiot sings praises about and wants to bring up his "babies" to be
just like them.
Ex convict criminals like Kangarooistan are a perfect example why
kangarooistan
Andy reminds us all WHY Islam grows 6 times FASTER than the ave
population growth in Australia
Is it any wonder Islam is growing so fast world wide , nothing can
stop Islam now , the numbers doubled in the last 20 years and at
present rates will double AGAIN inside 20 years from 1.5 billion to 3
billion then 6 billion in less than 40 years
Why am I not surprised , why are most new converts WOMEN ??
Need we ask , read Andys post if you still dont know
kanga
=====
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
muslim convert Muslim Converts.com how to become muslim , convert ...A
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Andy
Lu R
their jealous dominating husbands ROFLMAO..why wouldnt an intelligent woman
want to be treated like a domestic animal? SO many GREAT REASONS TO BE A
FUCKING MUSLIM MY ASS!!! Dream on kanga fuckwit
"kangarooistan" <gra...@kangarooistan.com.au> wrote in message
news:1181449553....@c77g2000hse.googlegroups.com...
Andy
wrote:
>OH YES I can see the women now lining up to get their clitorises cut off by
>their jealous dominating husbands ROFLMAO..
Or look the other way while muslim pedophiles fuck their children.
>why wouldnt an intelligent woman
>want to be treated like a domestic animal?
Or stoned to death for getting raped.
>SO many GREAT REASONS TO BE A
>FUCKING MUSLIM MY ASS!!! Dream on kanga fuckwit
Yup.. total hate mongering fuckwit. The sooner he tops himself, the
better off the world will be.
HTH
Ras Brown
Muslim by pronouncing the shahadah (pledge of conviction of faith) in
Arabic. The shahadah should be said in front of two adult Muslim
witnesses as follows:
"Ash HaduAllaa Ilaaha Il-lallaah Wa Ash Hadu Anna Muhammadar Rasullulah"
which means
"I bear Witness that there is no deity but Allah and I bear witness that
Muhammad if His Messenger".
I would not recommend anyone converts to Islam immediately, they should
first work out what is expected of them in Islam, what Islam is, it is a
very demanding religion, a way of life with strict moral rules. To be a
true Muslim you cannot be half hearted like most Christians are with
their own religion, for instance agreeing to not drink alcohol but you
will still gamble on the horses. Attending a mosque, talking to Muslims,
participating in a few Muslim events is useful to getting an idea on
Islam. There are also plenty of useful sites on the internet, and books
on Islam in the shops.
In this troubled world Islam provides a refuge with strict moral rules
on all aspects of life, which counters the moral decay in society.
kangarooistan
Hi Ras , I assume you live in UK ??
I understand you have more Mosques than in Australia and in my
experience Muslims can be quite distant from other Muslims in
Australia , less so all the time
But I have noticed many people slowly gather knowledge over years
until they are in fact believers , but need to make the final step ,
which they eventually do , I suspect many people do in fact delay ,
thinking it must be done in some formal structured way at the mosque ,
and this is not always practical or is delayed by lack of opportunity
Certainly I think most know its not a step to be taken lightly , as
you point out , but in aussie its not as easy to meet regularly ,
until recent years mosques were very very few and very very far
apart , and books and even news letters were almost non existent , 25
years ago , I had to get my news letters from IRAN as there were none
printed in Australia , now we have the Internet and can all get real
info / news almost anywhere , now all we really lack is the support
for all the new enquiries as I'm sure its the same in UK
There is simply not enough time to attend to all the new enquiries and
new converts, the Internet is a real good idea
Nothing can now stop Islams rapid growth, if people can read , they
can convert themselves , it would be possible to become a Muslim
without ever meeting a Muslim , the truth is there for anybody who
can read, its amazing how many new mosques [ prayer rooms] are bobbing
up in Australia , and Iv heard its the same in UK / EU
Even with all the bad press / I think its like when the media tell the
people NOT to read a book or watch a movie , the people flock to find
out MORE
If it was not for the Internet we would have to lock our doors to get
some peace , we could not afford to answer all the enquiries
kanga
=====
Ras Brown
are two mosques within reach of myself where I live.
I agree the internet is a great place to bring Muslims together in one
place, for the potential recruit finding the best internet site about
Islam can be confusing. There is nothing to stop an internet site being
created that will facilitate the needs of Muslims who live very far from
any mosque.
Because conversion to Islam is a way of life that requires a
considerable change in the lifestyle of converts, they need to be made
aware of all that is expected of them, whilst provided with guidance to
overcome the many problems they may experience. For instance a new
convert may face a hostile employer, who may not be too pleased that
they will be praying in work time, guidance in dealing with such hostile
employers would be useful. Allocating Muslim brothers or sisters to a
new potential convert via the internet or in the community would be
useful. If a potential convert fails to become a Muslim it is because in
many instances we failed to help them as Muslims.
The other problem is that Muslims are not addressing the bad press, many
people wrongly consider Islam is extremist, when in fact Islam is a
belief based upon moderation, a middle way between the two extremes. I
would like to see every Muslim talking to non-Muslims about what Islam
really is about.
I agree, certainly in Britain we are seeing more and more recruits
joining Islam, indeed I would like to see Islam as the leading faith in
the UK in my lifetime. The best way to recruit new converts is by
example, if a Muslim does something because of their faith, non-Muslims
see this, they start asking about Islam and may follow this by converting.
Fun Tyme
the muslim *political device* ?
kangarooistan
That's great , when I was born there was only one functioning mosque
in south Australia and we only got a second mosque in the 1970s , in
an area 10 times as big as UK , most of my life was spent several
hundred km from a mosque and often would not see another Muslim for
weeks , the white Australia policy in 1901 , kept most muslims out
until 1970s , we now have many many really nice mosques , my
grandfather helped build the first mosque at " MARREE " it was just
mud and sticks in the desert , if you google you can find a picture of
it , it was really very very very basic in 1860s
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PictureAustralia - South Australia, Marree - The Mosque ...Title,
South Australia, Marree - The Mosque. [Photographer, R Bean.] Image
number, M914:SOUTH AUSTRALIA 3506. Managed by, Item held by the
National ...
www.nla.gov.au/nla.cs-pa-HTTP%253A%252F%252FNAA12.NAA.GOV.AU%252FSCRIPTS%252FSEARCHOLD.ASP%253FO%253DPSI2%252...
- 21k - Cached - Similar pages - Note this
PictureAustralia - The Mosque, MarreeSubject, Mosques -- South
Australia -- Marree. Description, The Mosque at Hergott Springs. The
pool in the foreground was used by worshippers for washing ...
www.nla.gov.au/nla.cs-pa-HTTP%253A%252F%252FIMAGES.SLSA.SA.GOV.AU%252FMPCIMG%252F15470%252FB15341.HTM
- 21k - Cached - Similar pages - Note this
[ More results from nla.gov.au ]
Afghan Camelmen South Australian HistoryAfghans provided almost all
goods and services from South Australia to the Northern Territory. On
a regular basis they left Marree, and later when the ...
www.southaustralianhistory.com.au/afghans.htm - 12k - Cached - Similar
pages - Note this
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> I agree the internet is a great place to bring Muslims together in one
> place, for the potential recruit finding the best internet site about
> Islam can be confusing. There is nothing to stop an internet site being
> created that will facilitate the needs of Muslims who live very far from
> any mosque.
>
> Because conversion to Islam is a way of life that requires a
> considerable change in the lifestyle of converts, they need to be made
> aware of all that is expected of them, whilst provided with guidance to
> overcome the many problems they may experience. For instance a new
> convert may face a hostile employer, who may not be too pleased that
> they will be praying in work time, guidance in dealing with such hostile
> employers would be useful. Allocating Muslim brothers or sisters to a
> new potential convert via the internet or in the community would be
> useful. If a potential convert fails to become a Muslim it is because in
> many instances we failed to help them as Muslims.
>
> The other problem is that Muslims are not addressing the bad press,
Yes mate , the bad press is over whelming indeed
AND , as its clearly a deliberate campaign to demonize Islam , we can
not actually do a great deal , its deliberate and very skillfully
marketed dis information
BUT its mostly lies , and seekers of truth can find the truth in
minutes if they want , a few clicks and an open mind
And this is where Islam is actually benefiting by all the negative
press , like they some times say in marketing , there is no such thing
as bad press coverage , strange as it may seem , I'm 100% convinced
there is a massive number of people who have sought out answers from
reading all the bad press and many can see through the lies being
spread , any reasonable person can smell a lie after a while , and it
all slowly adds to the knowledge of Islam in the community , even if
only 1% of the public convert its still tens of thousands a year , and
my figures show over 30,000 more Muslims every year in Australia alone
and its probably twice that if the shy people are included . Its not a
race or a competition , but I bet its the same in UK ???
It may not be visible to everybody yet , but here close to the ground
I can tell the numbers coming through the long slow conversion pipe
are huge indeed
I suspect there are many holding back on the last step till the heat
dies down , AND many Muslims are holding back a little on inviting new
converts into their inner circle of friends until they are sure they
are genuine , and like me , if you already have half a dozen new
Muslim friends you can not help more without drowning other
responsibilities
That's why I think the Internet is helping big time indeed , There are
hundreds of fine sites for new comers and EXPERTS online 24 / 7 and
correct answers every time are available in minutes not weeks / months
as just 5 or ten years ago , every question took months to get an
answer , now it takes seconds
I had to wait weeks to get an news paper written by Muslims for
Muslims from IRAN , in english , on snail mail , I can now get 10 news
papers all in English in seconds after they hit the press anywhere in
the world
This really is new ground mate
Nothing can stop truth and justice now
It is a new world unfolding as we speak
kanga
=====
many
> people wrongly consider Islam is extremist, when in fact Islam is a
> belief based upon moderation, a middle way between the two extremes. I
> would like to see every Muslim talking to non-Muslims about what Islam
> really is about.
>
> I agree, certainly in Britain we are seeing more and more recruits
> joining Islam, indeed I would like to see Islam as the leading faith in
> the UK in my lifetime. The best way to recruit new converts is by
> example, if a Muslim does something because of their faith, non-Muslims
> see this, they start asking about Islam and may follow this by converting.- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
kangarooistan
> > =====
> I am UK based and indeed we have many mosques within easy reach, there
> are two mosques within reach of myself where I live.
That's great , when I was born there was only one functioning mosque
in south Australia and we only got a second mosque in the 1970s , in
an area 10 times as big as UK , most of my life was spent several
hundred km from a mosque and often would not see another Muslim for
weeks , the white Australia policy in 1901 , kept most muslims out
until 1970s , we now have many many really nice mosques , my
grandfather helped build the first mosque at " MARREE " it was just
mud and sticks in the desert , if you google you can find a picture
of
it , it was really very very very basic in 1860s
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PictureAustralia - South Australia, Marree - The Mosque ...Title,
South Australia, Marree - The Mosque. [Photographer, R Bean.] Image
number, M914:SOUTH AUSTRALIA 3506. Managed by, Item held by the
National ...
nla.gov.au/nla.cs-pa-HTTP%253A%252F%252FNAA12.NAA.GOV.AU
%252FSCRI......
- 21k - Cached - Similar pages - Note this
PictureAustralia - The Mosque, MarreeSubject, Mosques -- South
Australia -- Marree. Description, The Mosque at Hergott Springs. The
pool in the foreground was used by worshippers for washing ...
nla.gov.au/nla.cs-pa-HTTP%253A%252F%252FIMAGES.SLSA.SA.GOV.AU%252...
- 21k - Cached - Similar pages - Note this
[ More results from nla.gov.au ]
Afghan Camelmen South Australian HistoryAfghans provided almost all
goods and services from South Australia to the Northern Territory. On
a regular basis they left Marree, and later when the ...
www.southaustralianhistory.com.au/afghans.htm - 12k - Cached -
Similar
pages - Note this
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- Hide quoted text -
- Show quoted text -
> I agree the internet is a great place to bring Muslims together in one
kangarooistan
252FIMAGES.SLSA.SA.GOV.AU%252...
> - 21k - Cached - Similar pages - Note this
> [ More results from nla.gov.au ]
>
> Afghan Camelmen South Australian HistoryAfghans provided almost all
> goods and services from South Australia to the Northern Territory. On
Sam
wrote:
>The other problem is that Muslims are not addressing the bad press, many
>people wrongly consider Islam is extremist, when in fact Islam is a
>belief based upon moderation, a middle way between the two extremes. I
>would like to see every Muslim talking to non-Muslims about what Islam
>really is about.
The main issues you should address are the lack of tolerance of
non-Muslims in many Muslim countries and the general problem of
separation of Mosque and State.. Should blasphemy, apostasy and
heresy be criminal offenses? Would you like Sharia law to become the
law of the land in Australia, Britain and the US? Tell us which
version of Sharia law you espouse.
Gordon Burditt
>Muslim by pronouncing the shahadah (pledge of conviction of faith) in
>Arabic. The shahadah should be said in front of two adult Muslim
>witnesses as follows:
>
>"Ash HaduAllaa Ilaaha Il-lallaah Wa Ash Hadu Anna Muhammadar Rasullulah"
>
>which means
>
>"I bear Witness that there is no deity but Allah and I bear witness that
>Muhammad if His Messenger".
>
>I would not recommend anyone converts to Islam immediately, they should
>first work out what is expected of them in Islam, what Islam is, it is a
>very demanding religion, a way of life with strict moral rules. To be a
Is it true that Islam demands that the penalty for converting AWAY
from Islam is death, and that this penalty is supposed to be executed
by men, not God (or Allah, or whatever)? This raises the risk of
"try it and see if you like it" to extreme levels. (Historically,
Christianity hasn't been that pure in this regard either, see also
the Spanish Inquisition).
Does Islam condone suicide bombing? What is being done to ensure
that suicide bombers DON'T get 72 virgins? (Guess what, guys, YOU
are one of those virgins, and an 8-year-old girl.)
What is Islam's attitude regarding killing people of other faiths?
>true Muslim you cannot be half hearted like most Christians are with
>their own religion, for instance agreeing to not drink alcohol but you
>will still gamble on the horses. Attending a mosque, talking to Muslims,
>participating in a few Muslim events is useful to getting an idea on
>Islam. There are also plenty of useful sites on the internet, and books
>on Islam in the shops.
>In this troubled world Islam provides a refuge with strict moral rules
>on all aspects of life, which counters the moral decay in society.
There are a lot of people who proudly claim to be followers of Islam
who seem to be determined to trouble the world even more, along
with increasing the body count. Any comments?
Maxwell
> On Jun 10, 12:50 pm, Andy <ask_for_em...@here.com> wrote:
>
>
> Andy reminds us all WHY Islam grows 6 times FASTER than the ave
> population growth in Australia
>
> Is it any wonder Islam is growing so fast world wide , nothing can
> stop Islam now , the numbers doubled in the last 20 years and at
> present rates will double AGAIN inside 20 years from 1.5 billion to 3
> billion then 6 billion in less than 40 years
The reason Islam is growing is that the vast majority of Muslims are
illiterate peasants who don't know how to practice birth control--the
same reason why nearly all third-world shitholes have a population
problem and can't get their standard of living out of the toilet. And
even in developed countries, the ignorant and lower social-economic
classes tend to have a lot of kids. Muslims typically fall into one or
both of these categories.
JVB
"Maxwell" <J...@NOTaol.de> wrote in message
news:VsadneytwtVTi_Pb...@rcn.net...
parts are wrapped in UNWASHED pigskin then dumped in the nearest landfill
site (hazardous waste). Then televise this procedure to all tv channels.
They'll NEVER go to paradise
JVB
kangarooistan
Among the beauties of Islam is the fact that in this religion there
are no intermediaries in the relationship between a person and his
Lord.
Entering this religion does not involve any special ceremonies or
procedures that need to be done in front of any other person, nor
does
it require the consent of any specific people.
Becoming Muslim is very easy and anyone can do it even if he is all
alone in the desert or in a locked room.
Peter Jason
> It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
< yawn >
Is that the one about the bearded schizoid
Arab in 650AD who saw bright "lights" and
heard "voices"?
or the bearded one about the
kicked-out-of-Egypt Jew who climbed a
mountain and heard "voices" and saw bright
burning bushes?
or the carpenter's son who spoke with the
"voices"?
or Paul who fell off his horse after seeing
bright "lights" and hearing "voices."?
etc
Please explain.
kangarooistan
> "kangarooistan" <kangaroois...@gmail.com>
>
> > It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
>
> < yawn >
>
> Is that the one about the bearded schizoid
> Arab in 650AD who saw bright "lights" and
> heard "voices"?
>
> or the bearded one about the
> kicked-out-of-Egypt Jew who climbed a
> mountain and heard "voices" and saw bright
> burning bushes?
>
> or the carpenter's son who spoke with the
> "voices"?
Well mate the first three were all on the same path, and its clear you
have not actually understood what they were trying to tell you , or
reject their message
BUT Paul was an Roman "double agent" who chose to lead off the "
believers " like lambs into Roman control , then he transferred HQ to
Rome and adjusted the message to generate a flow of " taxes " into
Caesar's purse
The religion that is today called " Christianity " was built by paul
to serve ROME , it really has nothing to do with the message as-taught
by the others
Even to look at Christianity its clearly just the ROMAN empire with a
name change , even the clothes and office bearers and traditions , all
directly descended from ROME and nothing whatever to do with GOD
Andy
wrote:
>
>"kangarooistan" <kangar...@gmail.com>
>wrote in message
>news:1181688306....@n15g2000prd.googlegroups.com...
>> It Is Easy to Become a Muslim
Even easier to join the Now Faith! See below.
>
>< yawn >
>
>Is that the one about the bearded schizoid
>Arab in 650AD who saw bright "lights" and
>heard "voices"?
>
>or the bearded one about the
>kicked-out-of-Egypt Jew who climbed a
>mountain and heard "voices" and saw bright
>burning bushes?
>
>or the carpenter's son who spoke with the
>"voices"?
>
>or Paul who fell off his horse after seeing
>bright "lights" and hearing "voices."?
>
>etc
>
>Please explain.
I can see you're one of many confused about which religion is best for
you Peter. But boy oh boy.. have I got the solution for you!
Introducing.. The Church of Raymond!
Conversion is simple.. you need do absolutely nothing!!!!
Raymond - the Universal Religion is the religion for all, whether they
realise it or not.
The Now faith, made with the modern man, woman and thing in mind - for
all your religiousity needs look no further!
Raymond:
1) Contains all possible beliefs
Zoroastrian? Wiccan? Pastafarian? No matter what your conviction
Raymond caters for it! Raymond believes in absolutely everything,
including all the things that completely contradict each other. Keep
all the benefits of your current religion and get all the new ones
too, vastly improving your chances of getting whatever reward you
think you're going to get from being religious in the first place!
2) Contains all impossible beliefs
Not sure what you believe? Not religious at all? Stopped reading this
some time ago? No matter! Core to the philosophy of Raymond are all
beliefs that don't and can't exist, don't make any sense or aren't
even beliefs, including the exact opposites of those outlined here!
3) Permits everything
Tired of how restrictive your religion's rules are? No problem,
Raymond lets you indulge in any and all of your disgusting whims, no
matter how depraved, bestial and unnecessary they are, as long as you
remember that Raymond...
4) Forbids everything
Raymond is painfully aware that the warped and evil commandments of
ways of life other than yours are beyond the pale. Join Raymond and
the followers of these pernicious lies will finally admit what they
always knew to be true but cruelly hid from you out of spite and
self-loathing - that your judgement is flawless, and their warped
ideas of right and wrong will soon receive the public condemnation
they richly deserve.
5) Approves of everything
Even when the rules allow, many people worry that permitting
themselves even the simplest of pleasures can be somehow
self-indulgent or feeble-minded. With Raymond you can rest assured
that your harmless little psychotic drug-induced mass gimping frenzies
are mere charming foibles. In fact Raymond thinks the world would be a
gloomier place without them. However the same does not apply to the
demented acts of all the irritating bastards around you, because
Raymond...
6) Disapproves of everything
The outrageous moral decay of the pointless morons that constantly
harangue you with their worthless ninth-rate opinions and timewasting
drivel is beyond even Raymond's more-than-infinite tolerance. Rest
assured that all those friends, neighbours and enemies that seem to
dedicate their efforts to pointing out what a feckless dimwit you are
have not escaped Raymond's gaze. Their punishment will be as painful
as it is limitless.1
Yes, there is no doubt about it, Raymond is the religion for you. With
only a minimum of effort you can and will be appointed to the very
highest rank of Raymond's clergy, making you the greatest human that
has ever lived or will ever live, an all-powerful god, striding the
world like a colossus, with all existence bending to your slightest
whim! Absolutely no action at all is required on your part, so don't
delay - do nothing today!
Source: http://www.pandnotpian.org/index.html
HTH
Peter Jason
Well, that's allright then.
Peter Jason
"Andy" <ask_fo...@here.com> wrote in
message
news:lplu63ddh93pjj60r...@4ax.com...
I have to say I think the Egyptian religion
of antiquity was the best of all. If some
new religion came along they just adopted it.
Gods? the more the merrier!
Andy
wrote:
>
>"Andy" <ask_fo...@here.com> wrote in
>message
[ ~ ]
ROFL! Even better!! I love it. :)