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Re: Lusing managers...
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The Horny Goat
Nov 30, 2017, 2:38:19 PM11/30/17
to
On Thu, 30 Nov 2017 17:23:17 +0100, Gallian <gal...@linuxmail.org>
wrote:
>...But I repeat myself.
>
>$NEW_MANAGER *insists* on using the exact same wording to start a
>development issue with. Of course, our project management/ticketing
>system does not have templates to do the boilerplate opening with.
>
>So I get a bug report from a customer, whose wording would make the
>opening boilerplate redundant. Figuring that this is an obvious, logical
>exception, I skip the boilerplate.
>
>Of course $NEW_MANAGER accepts this with equanimity, right? Right?!
! Made my day....
https://clientsfromhell.net/ - if this is UI then I feel your pain!
wrote:
>...But I repeat myself.
>
>$NEW_MANAGER *insists* on using the exact same wording to start a
>development issue with. Of course, our project management/ticketing
>system does not have templates to do the boilerplate opening with.
>
>So I get a bug report from a customer, whose wording would make the
>opening boilerplate redundant. Figuring that this is an obvious, logical
>exception, I skip the boilerplate.
>
>Of course $NEW_MANAGER accepts this with equanimity, right? Right?!
! Made my day....
https://clientsfromhell.net/ - if this is UI then I feel your pain!
Peter Corlett
Dec 1, 2017, 4:38:00 AM12/1/17
to
Gallian <gal...@linuxmail.org> wrote:
> Since that is almost the exact wording he wants, either you worked with the
> guy or there is a school churning them out.
It's UI, but knowledge of the enemy is power so I'll share it anyway: the "As a
... I want ... so that ..." template is a so-called "user story" in Agile.
I have the same visceral hatred of the damn things, because they are
condescending, and I don't take kindly to being treated like an idiot or a
child. Mockery and sarcasm done in the same format can make it go away after a
while.
"As a BOFH I want to update my CV so that I can get away from this patronising
bullshit."
> Since that is almost the exact wording he wants, either you worked with the
> guy or there is a school churning them out.
It's UI, but knowledge of the enemy is power so I'll share it anyway: the "As a
... I want ... so that ..." template is a so-called "user story" in Agile.
I have the same visceral hatred of the damn things, because they are
condescending, and I don't take kindly to being treated like an idiot or a
child. Mockery and sarcasm done in the same format can make it go away after a
while.
"As a BOFH I want to update my CV so that I can get away from this patronising
bullshit."
Firesong
Dec 1, 2017, 6:02:20 AM12/1/17
to
On Fri, 01 Dec 2017 11:26:59 +0100, Gallian <gal...@linuxmail.org>
wrote:
>ab...@mooli.org.uk (Peter Corlett) writes:
>
>> Gallian <gal...@linuxmail.org> wrote:
>>
>>> Since that is almost the exact wording he wants, either you worked with the
>>> guy or there is a school churning them out.
>>
>> It's UI, but knowledge of the enemy is power so I'll share it anyway: the "As a
>> ... I want ... so that ..." template is a so-called "user story" in Agile.
>>
>I had a strong suspicion it was something like that.
>
>Unfortunately it appears that some people tend to get hung up on details
>like exact formulation and declaring you're not doing Agile if you don't
>use them.
>me. If I get a bug report and start with 'User X reports A while he was
>expecting B. Doing C will make him be able to do B...' what is the
>damn difficulty of seeing that that is exactly the same thing?
>
>Has luserdom gotten so bad that even ordinary language is too hard these
>days?
>
>Mart
<sarcasm> Yes, LOL! YW! TTFN! </sarcasm>
Procedures are meant to be FOLLOWED, not understood. If they were
understood, there would be to opportunity to flex and/or improve them,
and we wouldn't want that.
Iain
wrote:
>ab...@mooli.org.uk (Peter Corlett) writes:
>
>> Gallian <gal...@linuxmail.org> wrote:
>>
>>> Since that is almost the exact wording he wants, either you worked with the
>>> guy or there is a school churning them out.
>>
>> It's UI, but knowledge of the enemy is power so I'll share it anyway: the "As a
>> ... I want ... so that ..." template is a so-called "user story" in Agile.
>>
>
>Unfortunately it appears that some people tend to get hung up on details
>like exact formulation and declaring you're not doing Agile if you don't
>use them.
>
>> I have the same visceral hatred of the damn things, because they are
>> condescending, and I don't take kindly to being treated like an idiot or a
>> child. Mockery and sarcasm done in the same format can make it go away after a
>> while.
>>
>> "As a BOFH I want to update my CV so that I can get away from this patronising
>> bullshit."
>>
>It's not even that condescending in my eyes, but the redundancy hurts
>> I have the same visceral hatred of the damn things, because they are
>> condescending, and I don't take kindly to being treated like an idiot or a
>> child. Mockery and sarcasm done in the same format can make it go away after a
>> while.
>>
>> "As a BOFH I want to update my CV so that I can get away from this patronising
>> bullshit."
>>
>me. If I get a bug report and start with 'User X reports A while he was
>expecting B. Doing C will make him be able to do B...' what is the
>damn difficulty of seeing that that is exactly the same thing?
>
>Has luserdom gotten so bad that even ordinary language is too hard these
>days?
>
>Mart
<sarcasm> Yes, LOL! YW! TTFN! </sarcasm>
Procedures are meant to be FOLLOWED, not understood. If they were
understood, there would be to opportunity to flex and/or improve them,
and we wouldn't want that.
Iain
Firesong
Dec 1, 2017, 6:03:22 AM12/1/17
to
On Fri, 01 Dec 2017 11:02:18 +0000, Firesong <fire...@firesong.co.uk>
wrote:
>
>Procedures are meant to be FOLLOWED, not understood. If they were
>understood, there would be to opportunity to flex and/or improve them,
>and we wouldn't want that.
>
>Iain
Hmm, ..would be NO opportunity....
I have stapled my hand in penance.
Iain
wrote:
>
>Procedures are meant to be FOLLOWED, not understood. If they were
>understood, there would be to opportunity to flex and/or improve them,
>and we wouldn't want that.
>
>Iain
I have stapled my hand in penance.
Iain
Firesong
Dec 1, 2017, 6:04:49 AM12/1/17
to
On Fri, 01 Dec 2017 11:03:21 +0000, Firesong <fire...@firesong.co.uk>
wrote:
Oh for the love of $DEITY!
... would be THE opportunity....
I am punishing myself by drinking until the shame goes away. I will
get my coat....
wrote:
... would be THE opportunity....
I am punishing myself by drinking until the shame goes away. I will
get my coat....
Wojciech Derechowski
Dec 1, 2017, 7:26:51 AM12/1/17
to
On Fri, 01 Dec 2017 09:39:31 +0000, Roger Bell_West wrote:
> On the other hand, "when I do X, Y happens" is much less useful than
> "I'm trying to achieve Z, but when I do X, Y happens".
Which reminds me of so-called geekspeak correspondence lister by tchrist and
the problem it brushes on as documented in __DATA__ section, cf. eg.:
challenging = impossible
check mail = logon to email
clean = simple
client = browser
code = software
coding = creating/making a file
command = system call
commercial network = Extranet
commonplace = ubiquitous
competence = elitism
compile = build
computer = server
computer scientist = engineer
computer scientist = mathematician
computer secretary = admin
condescending = elitist
configurable = confusing
--
WD
Who is Entscheidungs and what is his problem?
> On the other hand, "when I do X, Y happens" is much less useful than
> "I'm trying to achieve Z, but when I do X, Y happens".
Which reminds me of so-called geekspeak correspondence lister by tchrist and
the problem it brushes on as documented in __DATA__ section, cf. eg.:
challenging = impossible
check mail = logon to email
clean = simple
client = browser
code = software
coding = creating/making a file
command = system call
commercial network = Extranet
commonplace = ubiquitous
competence = elitism
compile = build
computer = server
computer scientist = engineer
computer scientist = mathematician
computer secretary = admin
condescending = elitist
configurable = confusing
--
WD
Who is Entscheidungs and what is his problem?
hymie!
Dec 1, 2017, 8:22:03 AM12/1/17
to
In our last episode, the evil Dr. Lacto had captured our hero,
management. It doesn't matter if the rule makes sense, or even applies
in this situation. The requirement is there; fulfill the requirement,
check the box, and move on.
--hymie! http://lactose.homelinux.net/~hymie hy...@lactose.homelinux.net
Gallian <gal...@linuxmail.org>, who said:
>
> So I get a bug report from a customer, whose wording would make the
> opening boilerplate redundant. Figuring that this is an obvious, logical
> exception, I skip the boilerplate.
I find myself subject to what my co-worker calls "check the box" style
>
> So I get a bug report from a customer, whose wording would make the
> opening boilerplate redundant. Figuring that this is an obvious, logical
> exception, I skip the boilerplate.
management. It doesn't matter if the rule makes sense, or even applies
in this situation. The requirement is there; fulfill the requirement,
check the box, and move on.
--hymie! http://lactose.homelinux.net/~hymie hy...@lactose.homelinux.net
The Horny Goat
Dec 1, 2017, 5:59:16 PM12/1/17
to
>>It's not even that condescending in my eyes, but the redundancy hurts
>>me. If I get a bug report and start with 'User X reports A while he was
>>expecting B. Doing C will make him be able to do B...' what is the
>>damn difficulty of seeing that that is exactly the same thing?
>>
>>Has luserdom gotten so bad that even ordinary language is too hard these
>>days?
>>
>>Mart
>
><sarcasm> Yes, LOL! YW! TTFN! </sarcasm>
>
>Procedures are meant to be FOLLOWED, not understood. If they were
>understood, there would be to opportunity to flex and/or improve them,
>and we wouldn't want that.
Sometimes the only real solution is disconnecting the power cable and
>>me. If I get a bug report and start with 'User X reports A while he was
>>expecting B. Doing C will make him be able to do B...' what is the
>>damn difficulty of seeing that that is exactly the same thing?
>>
>>Has luserdom gotten so bad that even ordinary language is too hard these
>>days?
>>
>>Mart
>
><sarcasm> Yes, LOL! YW! TTFN! </sarcasm>
>
>Procedures are meant to be FOLLOWED, not understood. If they were
>understood, there would be to opportunity to flex and/or improve them,
>and we wouldn't want that.
putting all the equipment into a box.
Thinking that is fine - actually writing it in a ticket report is
likely to self-LART one's career! I think anybody who's been a Monk
knows that.
That said my most memorable moment in my career was the day I had to
install new hardware in a forensic psychiatric unit (this is where the
patients get committed by a judge not a doctor!) (1) and the alarms
bells went off unexpectedly - found out later that an inmate who had
gone off his medication started acting out - thus triggering the
lockdown. I climbed under the table in the nursing station trying to
look invisible and was later commended by my boss for 'keeping out of
the way of those who knew what to do'.
Needless to say the new equipment got installed on the next shift.....
(1) A real life "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" but without a Jack
Nicholson to make it funny.
The Horny Goat
Dec 1, 2017, 6:04:54 PM12/1/17
to
ALGOL program where in a misguided effort to save memory they included
the line
DEFINE FOUR := 5;
(that code definition required 1 byte vs if you had multiple lines
saying X1 := 4 * X2 in various subroutines it took a byte for every
instance of 4 vs only one for X1 := FOUR * X2)
Naturally the answer turned out to be that some long departed
programmer had "fixed" the code to deal with one subroutine oblivious
to the fact that he had thus bollixed the rest of the program.
I fully appreciate this was before some of the monks here were even
born.....and when 9-track tape was new technology.
Wojciech Derechowski
Dec 1, 2017, 11:59:29 PM12/1/17
to
On Fri, 01 Dec 2017 22:59:12 +0000, The Horny Goat wrote:
>
> (1) A real life "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" but without a Jack
> Nicholson to make it funny.
To make it real life always has a Big Nurse rather than Jack Nicholson's
>
> (1) A real life "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" but without a Jack
> Nicholson to make it funny.
character. Nurse Ratched BTW is much more convincing in the book.
Lawns 'R' Us
Dec 3, 2017, 2:39:27 AM12/3/17
to
On 2017-12-02, Michel <ab...@rubberchicken.nl> wrote:
> Agile is a funny thing. If it's supposed to be so flexible and, well, agile,
> then why does it feel like a straitjacket from this end?
Nononononono. You're misunderstanding.
It's not YOU who's agile. It's the lusers. They're so agile, in fact,
that you have absolutely no chance of catching one and nailing down
exactly what it is that they want. But you're still expected to figure
it out and provide it, and Woe Be Unto You if you don't.
> Agile is a funny thing. If it's supposed to be so flexible and, well, agile,
> then why does it feel like a straitjacket from this end?
Nononononono. You're misunderstanding.
It's not YOU who's agile. It's the lusers. They're so agile, in fact,
that you have absolutely no chance of catching one and nailing down
exactly what it is that they want. But you're still expected to figure
it out and provide it, and Woe Be Unto You if you don't.
Steve VanDevender
Dec 9, 2017, 7:54:12 PM12/9/17
to
Roger Bell_West <roger+a...@nospam.firedrake.org> writes:
> On 2017-12-08, Michel wrote:
>
> Clearly it is necessary to constrain user desires.
>
> I recommend a fuel-air nailgun with 4mm nails, minimum penetration
> depth at least 60mm.
" . . . every problem looks like a Messiah."
--
Steve VanDevender "I ride the big iron" http://hexadecimal.uoregon.edu/
ste...@hexadecimal.uoregon.edu PGP keyprint 4AD7AF61F0B9DE87 522902969C0A7EE8
Little things break, circuitry burns / Time flies while my little world turns
Every day comes, every day goes / 100 years and nobody shows -- Happy Rhodes
> On 2017-12-08, Michel wrote:
>>On 03 Dec 2017 07:39:26 GMT, Lawns 'R' Us wrote:
>>> It's not YOU who's agile. It's the lusers. They're so agile, in fact,
>>> that you have absolutely no chance of catching one and nailing down
>>> exactly what it is that they want. But you're still expected to figure
>>> it out and provide it, and Woe Be Unto You if you don't.
>> ^ on a hard deadline, obviously
>>> It's not YOU who's agile. It's the lusers. They're so agile, in fact,
>>> that you have absolutely no chance of catching one and nailing down
>>> exactly what it is that they want. But you're still expected to figure
>>> it out and provide it, and Woe Be Unto You if you don't.
>
> Clearly it is necessary to constrain user desires.
>
> I recommend a fuel-air nailgun with 4mm nails, minimum penetration
> depth at least 60mm.
" . . . every problem looks like a Messiah."
--
Steve VanDevender "I ride the big iron" http://hexadecimal.uoregon.edu/
ste...@hexadecimal.uoregon.edu PGP keyprint 4AD7AF61F0B9DE87 522902969C0A7EE8
Little things break, circuitry burns / Time flies while my little world turns
Every day comes, every day goes / 100 years and nobody shows -- Happy Rhodes
Wojciech Derechowski
Dec 10, 2017, 12:10:06 AM12/10/17
to
On Sun, 10 Dec 2017 00:53:54 +0000, Steve VanDevender wrote:
> Roger Bell_West <roger+a...@nospam.firedrake.org> writes:
>
>> On 2017-12-08, Michel wrote:
>>>On 03 Dec 2017 07:39:26 GMT, Lawns 'R' Us wrote:
>>>> It's not YOU who's agile. It's the lusers. They're so agile, in fact,
>>>> that you have absolutely no chance of catching one and nailing down
>>>> exactly what it is that they want. But you're still expected to figure
>>>> it out and provide it, and Woe Be Unto You if you don't.
>>> ^ on a hard deadline, obviously
>>
>> Clearly it is necessary to constrain user desires.
>>
>> I recommend a fuel-air nailgun with 4mm nails, minimum penetration
>> depth at least 60mm.
>
> " . . . every problem looks like a Messiah."
>
Who the hell is Janet Campbell?
> Roger Bell_West <roger+a...@nospam.firedrake.org> writes:
>
>> On 2017-12-08, Michel wrote:
>>>On 03 Dec 2017 07:39:26 GMT, Lawns 'R' Us wrote:
>>>> It's not YOU who's agile. It's the lusers. They're so agile, in fact,
>>>> that you have absolutely no chance of catching one and nailing down
>>>> exactly what it is that they want. But you're still expected to figure
>>>> it out and provide it, and Woe Be Unto You if you don't.
>>> ^ on a hard deadline, obviously
>>
>> Clearly it is necessary to constrain user desires.
>>
>> I recommend a fuel-air nailgun with 4mm nails, minimum penetration
>> depth at least 60mm.
>
> " . . . every problem looks like a Messiah."
>
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