This was a fun read: Warning: LONG
Barfolomew
http://www.maximonline.com/maximlounge/maxim_print/html/5032.html
Movie Secrets
Get ready to dominate every movie conversation for the rest of your
life.
Maxim, February 2003
OK, so you can quote entire monologues from Pulp Fiction and you know
that the only correct answer to the question “How do you measure
yourself against other golfers?” is “By height.” Frankly, pal, that’s
freshman-level stuff. If you want to ace a
shootin’-the-movie-shit-around-the-bar exam, you’re going to need to
cram. Luckily, we’ve scribbled down a cool trivia cheat sheet,
chock-full of inside info about your favorite flicks that Ebert would
trade his left donut to know. Remember: There’s useless crap, and then
there’s useless crap you can use to one-up your buddies.
CODE-BREAKERS
Randomly chosen numbers or secret celluloid messages?
So why does Morpheus’ ship in The Matrix, the Nebuchadnezzar, bear a
plaque reading MARK 3. NO. 11? Well, in the Bible, Mark 3:11 reads,
“The unclean spirits fell down before him and cried out, saying, ‘You
are the Son of God.’” Not to be confused with Matthew 4:18, which, we
think, reads, “I knoweth kung fu.”
Paul Newman’s prison number (37) in Cool Hand Luke is another sly Good
Book reference. Luke 1:37 says, “For with God nothing shall be
impossible”—except, apparently, escaping from a redneck chain gang.
And you thought Fight Club’s twist ending was a mind-fuck: At the
movie’s 84th minute, Project Mayhem blows up a bunch of Apple
computers—a planned reference to Apple’s famous Orwellian “1984”
commercial, first aired in 1984. Need more? That ad was directed by
Ridley Scott, who made Blade Runner with cinematographer Jordan
Cronenweth, whose son, Jeff, was the cinematographer on Fight Club.
In Star Trek: First Contact, the villainous Borgs’ eye flashes are
actually Morse code, spelling out the names of the cast and crew.
WHEN PROPS ATTACK!
Giving the stunt man the afternoon off isn’t always the smartest move.
Al Pacino may have introduced those cock-a-roaches to his “little
friend” in Scarface, but he took some friendly fire, too. Wielding the
grenade-launching assault rifle in the movie’s climax, Pacino burned
his hand so badly on the hot barrel that production was shut down for
weeks.
While shooting an intense sparring scene in Martin Scorsese’s classic
boxing flick, Raging Bull, Robert “Method” De Niro got a little too
amped up and accidentally broke one of costar Joe Pesci’s ribs.
Pesci’s yelp of pain worked so well that Scorsese decided to leave
that take in the final cut.
Rounding out the Italian mishap trifecta, GoodFellas’ “fucking prick”
lackey Spider (Michael Imperioli) accidentally gashed his hand on
broken glass. He was taken to the ER, where doctors mistook gunshot
makeup for a real chest wound. Which is funny…like a clown.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE
The wounds on Russell Crowe’s face after the opening battle scene are
real, caused when his horse startled and backed him into tree
branches. The stitches in his cheek are clearly visible when he’s
telling Commodus that he intends to return home.
DIRECTOR TRADEMARKS
What’s the fun of being in charge if you can’t make yourself happy?
Sam Raimi’s really fond of his busted-ass 1973 Oldsmobile Delta 88,
’cause it’s in all his movies (except Western yarn The Quick and the
Dead). It even shows up as Uncle Ben’s carjacked ride in Spider-Man.
Quentin Tarantino is his own best invention, but he’s also concocted a
brand of cigarettes (Red Apple) and a fast-food franchise (Big Kahuna
Burger) that appear in all his movies—even those he didn’t direct,
like From Dusk Till Dawn.
George Lucas’ pointless trademark is the number 1138, a shout-out to
his 1971 debut, THX-1138. It’s on the hero’s license plate in American
Graffiti, while in Star Wars, lost Allman Brother Chewbacca is called
a “prison transfer from cellblock 1138.” Pal Steven Spielberg even
uses it: Indiana Jones emerges from a Nazi sub in Raiders of the Lost
Ark just as a loudspeaker blares, “Ein, ein, drei, acht” (Kraut for
“one, one, three, eight”).
John Landis constantly uses “See you next Wednesday,” a throwaway line
from Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey. It’s the title of the
porno film in An American Werewolf in London, and it’s on the
state-trooper-hiding billboard in The Blues Brothers.
BOND BITS
007-In-Chief
From Russia With Love was selected as the second 007 movie after John
F. Kennedy put it on his “top 10 novels” list. Incidentally, it also
happened to be the last film JFK watched before his ill-fated trip to
Dallas.
Formality
Pierce Brosnan’s Bond contract stipulates that he can’t wear a tuxedo
in any other movie, a clause he circumvented in a Thomas Crown Affair
party scene by undoing his monkey suit’s top button and loosening the
tie.
Spy Games
GoldenEye was actually the code name of an allied contingency plan for
the Nazi invasion of Spain that former SIS agent turned author Ian
Fleming helped concoct.
Das Boat
The famous powerboat jump over the bayou causeway in Live and Let Die
set a world record for distance: 115 feet.
Octowussy
In Dr. No the shot of the tarantula crawling toward 007 while he’s
lying in bed was shot with a stunt man. Why? Mr. Sean Connery is
morbidly afraid of spiders.
Swiss Eats
Piz Gloria, Blofeld’s headquarters in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service,
is a restaurant atop Mount Schilthorn in Switzerland.
Big Hurts
Danger is inherent in making any Bond flick: A helicopter carrying the
director of From Russia With Love crashed while filming, nearly
killing him. Connery sustained serious back injuries during his
climactic Fort Knox battle with henchman Oddjob in Goldfinger. A stunt
man died filming the bobsled chase in For Your Eyes Only, and Tom
Jones reportedly fainted after belting out the title song for
Thunderball.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE
Musical Scares
Evil mime Alice Cooper has a track titled “Man with the Golden Gun” on
his album Muscle of Love. Cooper claims it was written as the theme
song to the Bond film, but the producers got cold feet and didn’t use
it.
ON LOCATION
Planning a vacation? Let these movies be your guide.
Looking for a romantic getaway? We recommend the Timberline Lodge on
Mt. Hood, Oregon, which was used as the Overlook Hotel in The Shining.
But don’t request poltergeist hot spot Room 237—the owners asked
Kubrick not to use an actual room number.
While the Psycho house is a tourist trap on the Universal back lot in
Hollywood, you could get a more genuine chill by cruising by its
doppelgänger, the actual spooky Kent, Ohio home that Hitchcock copied.
Just don’t ask to use the shower.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE
If you ever find yourself walking along the lovely and secluded
Westward Beach, nestled between Zuma and Point Dume in Malibu,
California, don’t be surprised if you get the sudden urge to drop to
your knees and shout, “Damn you! Damn you all to hell!” That’s where
they shot the Planet of the Apes’ legendary ending.
PAYBACK’S A BITCH
Why entertain when you can just take cheap shots at your enemies
instead?
In 1996’s Independence Day, the filmmakers included a sarcastic crack
about The X-Files. So in 1998’s X-Files movie, Agent Mulder (David
Duchovny) just happens to drain his little green man all over an ID4
poster in an alley. S-s-s-s-subtle.
Disgruntled Who Framed Roger Rabbit animators sneaked Disney boss
Michael Eisner’s home phone number into some background graffiti. The
gag was yanked from the video release.
In the unauthorized John Belushi biopic Wired, the sound of helicopter
blades accompanies the appearance of a fictionalized John Landis. Why?
Well, Landis directed the segment of 1983’s Twilight Zone: The Movie
in which actor Vic Morrow and two children were decapitated when a
helicopter stunt went awry. Ouch!
Horror honcho Wes Craven named A Nightmare on Elm Street’s bogeyman
Freddy Kreuger after a kid who bullied him in grade school. Sheesh,
the girl who dumped him on prom night must really dread every new
Craven release.
END GAME
Some classic examples of last-minute fine-tuning.
Fatal Attraction
What you saw: Psycho booty call Glenn Close is shot by Michael
Douglas’ wife after a dramatic rise from the bathtub following her
supposed drowning.
What was planned: Close commits suicide, and Douglas is accused of
murder. His wife then finds Close’s taped confession. The audience is
treated to a flashback of Close slitting her own throat.
First Blood
What you saw: After a blubbery “I was called a baby killer”
confrontation with Colonel Trautman, posttraumatic stress boy Rambo
surrenders to the police.
What was planned: Knowing that there’s no going back, Rambo kills
himself. Test audiences, oddly enough, thought this ending was a
“downer.”
THE QUICK AND THE PAID
The short stories behind some cool cameos.
Green Bay Packers quarterback Brett Favre snagged his role as Cameron
Diaz’ ex in There’s Something About Mary when the original jock, San
Francisco’s Steve Young, passed on it because the vulgarity-laced
script went against his strict Mormon beliefs.
Fookin’ hell, mate! The sleazy dealer from whom Renton buys the
suppositories in Trainspotting is none other than the novel’s bad-boy
author himself, Irvine Welsh.
The prison guard who returns Jake Blues’ belongings (including a
soiled prophylactic) in The Blues Brothers is played by Frank Oz,
a.k.a. the voice of Yoda. Three years later the warbly voiced
actor-director would again cameo as a prison guard, this time in
Trading Places. Cool!
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE
The real-life detectives Eddie Egan and Sonny Grosso, upon whom the
French Connection characters “Popeye” Doyle and “Cloudy” Russo are
based, appear in the film as the detectives’ supervisors.
HEAVY ARTILLERY
Know a self-described film buff? Floor him with these strictly
hard-core hits.
One of the most disturbing homages ever is the Star Wars epilogue, in
which our galactic heroes receive medals for blowin’ up the Death Star
real good. The scene is a shot-for-shot re-creation of a famous award
sequence in the Nazi propaganda epic Triumph of the Will.
A very distinct scream first recorded for the little-known 1951
cowboys-and-Injuns flick Distant Drums but associated with an
arrow-recipient character named Wilhelm in 1953’s Charge at Feather
River, has become the longest-running movie inside joke ever.
Filmmakers have sampled the death shriek in dozens of flicks, from
Star Wars to Spider-Man, to the point that sound editors refer to it
as “the Wilhelm.”
In the beginning of The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring,
Bilbo entertains a group of Hobbit tots with a story about three
trolls turned to stone (events from The Hobbit). Later, when Aragorn
is tending to the wounded Frodo, you can clearly see three stone
trolls in the background. That’s the trivia equivalent of a +10 magic
spell.
CHEAP SHOTS
Screw CGI. Nothing beats these examples of bargain-basement FX.
Yep, that was a real horse’s head in The Godfather. They used a fake
one in rehearsals but slipped in the real deal when the cameras
rolled.
The classic Bogart flick Casablanca had such a shoestring budget that
they couldn’t even use a real airplane during the famous ending.
Instead, a cardboard cutout was placed in the background and
surrounded by a midget flight crew, giving the illusion of a full-size
plane.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE
Think Star Wars: Episode 1—The Phantom Menace is all big budget
computer effects? Qui-Gonn Jinn’s communicator is actually an Excel
shaver for women.
WAR’S HELL
How great war movies got the blood-and-guts details right.
There’s a reason why the tough-guy actors in The Deer Hunter’s
harrowing Russian roulette scene—Robert De Niro, Christopher Walken,
and John Savage—look so genuinely scared shitless: A live round was
put in the gun, with crew members trusted to check that the bullet
wasn’t in the chamber.
To heighten the gut-wrenching realism of Saving Private Ryan’s D-day
invasion, director Steven Spielberg cast real amputees to play GI’s
with their limbs freshly blown off. Hey, fellas, wave to the camera!
The reason the grunts in Platoon look so naturally wasted in the scene
where Sergeant Elias (Willem Dafoe) and mates smoke marijuana is that
they lit up real Thai weed. The catering table was never heard from
again.
GOOFS GONE WILD
Movie sets have gaffers. They also have gaffes.
When basset-hound-lovin’ Snowman drives jubilantly through the Atlanta
fairgrounds at the end of Smokey and the Bandit, a band is playing
“Marching Through Georgia.” Since that ditty is about Civil War Union
general William Tecumseh Sherman reducing Atlanta to smoldering ashes,
it’s pretty unlikely Georgians would use it to celebrate anything…even
the arrival of bootleg beer.
“At my signal, unleash Levi’s.” Early in Gladiator, Russell Crowe’s
Maximus walks through camp assessing the aftermath of the battle with
the Germanic tribes. When he stops to pet one of the horses, a crewman
wearing blue jeans can clearly be seen wandering in the background.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE
The girls of Charlie’s Angels got very close during filming…but maybe
too close. When the girls are fighting the “creepy thin man,” Drew
Barrymore shouts “Lucy!” Um…we’re pretty sure she meant “Alex,” the
character played by Lucy Liu.
MOUTHING OFF
Four classic lines that were made up on the spot. Sorta like this
article.
“You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me?”—Robert De Niro, Taxi Driver
“He-e-e-e-e-re’s Johnny!”—Jack Nicholson, The Shining
“How am I funny?”—Joe Pesci, GoodFellas
“You’re gonna need a bigger boat.”—Roy Scheider, Jaws
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE: MOUTHING OFF 2
Old classics that are constantly being misquoted
Humphrey Bogart never says “Play it again, Sam” in Casablanca. The
line is: “You played it for her, you can play it for me. Play it!” The
“Play it again, Sam” line actually comes from the Marx Brothers’ movie
A Night in Casablanca.
Most people need to tweak their recollection of Mae West’s famous come
hither line, “Why don’t you come up and see me some time?” It was
actually “Why don’t you come up some time, and see me?” in She Done
Him Wrong.
James Cagney also never said, “You dirty rat, you killed my brother.”
He did, however, say, “You dirty rat, I’m going to get rid of you just
like you gave it to my brother!” in the movie Taxi and instantly
birthed a million bad impressions.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE: BEFORE THE BEGINNING
Prequels may be all the rage now, but here are a few you probably
didn’t even know about.
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly—Ever wonder why Clint doesn’t don his
trademark poncho until the end of Sergio Leone’s masterpiece? Because
the events of Ugly—the last movie of the spaghetti western trilogy to
be released—take place before those of A Fistful of Dollars and For a
Few Dollars More.
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom—Note the date at the opening of
the movie—it’s 1935, a year before the events of Raiders of the Lost
Ark.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE: SOMETHING BORROWED
Ever heard of the cop movie Simon Says? That’s because the script—a
generic action thriller about the NYPD battling a puzzle-happy
terrorist—was rewritten as Die Hard With a Vengeance, with villain
Simon turned into the brother of Hans Gruber from the original Die
Hard.
Trick or…trick? The producers of Halloween, content that slasher
Michael Myers had officially bitten it in Halloween 2, decided to
release a new, non-Myers-related Halloween movie every year. The first
attempt was a story about killer masks called Halloween III: Season of
the Witch. It tanked, so the producers ditched the concept and
performed some quick CPR on Michael.
LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE: DIVIDE AND PAMPER
The perks Hollywood stars have demanded and gotten!
Jack Nicholson—a satellite dish on the roof of his hotel, so he could
watch the Lakers.
Jim Carrey—a personal chef for his pet iguana
Yul Brynner—a large mirror above his hotel bed.
Robert Duvall—installation of a brand-new dance floor, so he could
practice the tango for two hours a day.
Casting Ouch
Match these thilly thespians with the megahit roles they came this
close to playing.
1. Stephen Baldwin
2. Christopher Walken
3. O.J. Simpson
4. Kyle MacLachlan
5. Burt Reynolds
6. Chris O’Donnell
7. Michelle Pfeiffer
8. Milla Jovovich
A. T-800 in The Terminator (Arnold Schwarzenegger)
B. Michael Corleone in The Godfather (Al Pacino)
C. Jack Traven in Speed (Keanu Reeves)
D. Agent J in Men in Black (Will Smith)
E. Clarice Starling in Silence of the Lambs (Jodie Foster)
F. Chris in Platoon (Charlie Sheen)
G. Natalie in Charlie’s Angels (Cameron Diaz)
H. Han Solo in Star Wars (Harrison Ford)
Answer: 1-C, 2-H, 3- A, 4-F, 5-B, 6-D , 7-E, 8-G
Amateur’s Cut
Steal tips from the pros and make your home movies
special-edition-worthy.
Director Trademark
Like Sam Raimi, include your crappy first car in every vacation video.
Unlike Sam Raimi, this isn’t for kitsch value but for “I have no car
other than a Pinto” value.
In-Jokes
Insist that your girlfriend wear a COED NAKED PUB CRAWL T-shirt as a
sly nod to your very first film, Taping My Wasted College Roommate as
He Ralphed off the Balcony That Time.
Cameos
Always make a brief appearance in your own projects, allowing you to
claim later that those multiple closeups of your fingers wiping
schmutz off the lens were totally on purpose.
Special Effects
Sure, you only captured four seconds of your neighbor’s hot daughter
sunbathing topless, but the miracle of slow-mo can make it your opus’
entire second act.
Alternate Endings
Get a tepid response from your “focus group” (read: neighbors bribed
with free onion dip)? Reshoot an alternate twist ending, in which your
wife doesn’t come back from vacation or your son doesn’t graduate from
kindergarten.
Special Features
Include a rambling audio commentary. Because if there’s anything
people love more than your home movies, it’s you talking about your
home movies.
Barfolomew "I'm my own best friend"
NOT an inmate!
email me at: barf->at<-altmusicrush.com
www.altmusicrush.com/faq.html Do yourself a favor:
Read it before posting. The baboons show no mercy.
DJ
"Think Star Wars: Episode 1-The Phantom Menace is all big budget
computer effects? Qui-Gonn Jinn's communicator is actually an Excel
shaver for women."
and:
"LOUNGE EXCLUSIVE: DIVIDE AND PAMPER
The perks Hollywood stars have demanded and gotten!
Yul Brynner-a large mirror above his hotel bed." He's got his priorities
right ...
DJ
Barfolomew
>Yul Brynner-a large mirror above his hotel bed." He's got his priorities
>right ...
>
>
>DJ
As do you, apparently.
;-)
Mr. Guy Man
guys.
Did you know about 10010001 (Body Electric)? It is ASCII (American Stadard
Code for Information Interchange) for capital "I" (in a song about gaining
one's individuality). I don't think that Neil has ever said that it was on
purpose, but that would be a pretty huge coincidence.
Mr. Guy Man
"Barfolomew" <no...@home.com> wrote in message
news:2pni3v8t7pn12tqss...@4ax.com...
Mr. Guy Man
"Mr. Guy Man" <x...@y.com> wrote in message news:WjZ_9.54379$j5.175696@news...
Barfolomew
>Crap, screwed up my binary (and lyrics). Should be 1001001.
Maybe you should have sent out an SOS.... ;)