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The Thread Whose Name Cannot Be Spoken

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Richard D Magrath

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Sep 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/28/99
to
It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts Club
Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder Gods.
And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five motion
picture experiences. Ta.

Richard D. Magrath
LtRi...@aol.com

Nunya D. Bidness

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Sep 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/28/99
to
CNN
...
CBN
...
*cowerz, quivering*

Respex,
WiT

If marriage as outlawed, then only outlaws would have inlaws.


Robert McKay

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Sep 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/28/99
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>Subject: The Thread Whose Name Cannot Be Spoken
>From: ltri...@aol.com (Richard D Magrath)
>Date: Tue, 28 September 1999 05:27 PM EDT

>It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
>research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts
>Club
>Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder
>Gods.
>And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five motion
>picture experiences. Ta.

I'm not much of a movie fan; I'm into books. But let me see if I even have
five movies I could call favorites...

1. *Interview With the Vampire*
2. *The Wizard of Oz*
3. *Once Upon a Time in the West*
4. *A Fistful of Dollars*
5. *Zardoz*

Well whataya know!<g>

Robert McKay/Raibeart MacAoidh
AOL - Goffs California
E-mail - goffsca...@aol.com
I Ah hid a harn Ah'd be fell.

Charles P. Zaglanis

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Sep 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/28/99
to
> It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
> research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts
Club
> Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder
Gods.
> And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five
motion
> picture experiences. Ta.
>
> Richard D. Magrath

1. The Exorcist
2. Blues Brothers
3. Animal House
4. Kentucky Fried Movie
5. The Outlaw Josey Wales

Chuck Z.

Steven Howard

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Sep 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/28/99
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In <19990928172701...@ngol06.aol.com>, on 09/28/99
at 09:27 PM, ltri...@aol.com (Richard D Magrath) said:

>It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
>research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts
>Club Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the
>Elder Gods. And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your
>top five motion picture experiences. Ta.

This is completely off the top of my head and if you asked me yesterday or
tomorrow I'd probably have listed five different movies. Anyway -- in no
particular order: Casablanca, Duck Soup, This is Spinal Tap, the Haunting
(the original b&w Robert Wise film), Brazil.

========
Steven Howard
mrb...@earthlink.net

"What's a nice word for euphemism?"


StoOdin101

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
> It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five motion
>picture experiences.

IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE
THE WIZARD OF OZ
BABE
because they have the aspect of childlike naivete and fantasy, undiluted by
adult cynicism and spite. They are as far removed from Lovecraft as you could
get, of course.

THE FLY (1986)

This, on the other hand, has EVERYTHING that makes a story Lovecraftian, IMHO,
and has real characterization in the bargain. Something the Old Gent just never
did care enough to tend to. And it is the only horror movie I know of that can
hold a candle to

THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN

simply one of the monuments of the genre.

" The one test of the really weird is just this -- whether or not there be
excited in the reader a profound sense of dread, and of contact with unknown
spheres and powers...." --- H.P. Lovecraft


DHammann

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
CHINATOWN - the ending always leaves me numb with horror
BRAZIL
THEATRE OF BLOOD
SUNSET BOULEVARD
ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN - a childhood favorite
alt.horror.cthulhu

james ambuehl

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
Hmm . . . how about TV shows?:

Doctor Who
The Avengers
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Babylon 5
Quatermass

-- Jim

PS -- Or maybe that new show with the sexy spy-ladies -- Snoops!

Q. What's 600' tall, British, tentacled and green, and dwells in a
non-Euclidian police box sunken beneath the Pacific?

A. Doctor Cthul-Who!!!


M. Short

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
When I'm not out corrupting the innocent, or pouring over volumes of forgotten
lore, I like to watch:

1) Star Wars
2) The Empire Strikes Back
3) Saving Private Ryan (my regiment was one of the assault regiments at Omaha
Beach, and we are heavily indoctrinated in past glories. Much like HPL)
4) The Adventures of Robin Hood (Errol Flynn version if you please)
5) Aliens (US Marines destroy Lovecraftian monsters through superior firepower,
discipline, and esprit. Do shoggoths have esprit? Someday I want to say in a
shaky voice, "lay down suppressive fire and fall back by squads to the APC" as
implacable alien horrors tear my platoon apart. Cany you suppress a shoggoth?)
6) Highlander
7) Tod Browning's Darcula (BTW, it's eing released to video and DVD with a
soundtrack)
8) McClintock! (The Duke. Enough said.)
9) A Bridge too Far
10) Return of the Jedi
M. Short


Alice Lyman

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to Richard D Magrath
Hmm, tough one...
This is not in any particular order
1. Arcadia of My Youth (or My Youth in Arcadia, depending on how you want
to translate it.) why? Captain Harlock's origin story, involving storyline
(some say it's disjointed, I've never had a problem following it), great
ending.
2. Casablanca. Why? perfect casting, fun storyline (even more fun when
you know they were basically writing it as it was being filmed), and
Claude Rains.
3. The Haunting (The original!). Why? It's one of the few movie I simply
cannot watch alone. The remake on the other hand makes me laugh myself
sick.
4. A Night at the Opera. Why? You have to ask?
5. The Phantom of the Opera (1925? Lon Chaney version) Why? Well, it's a
favorite book of mine and this so far has been the closest film version
I've seen.
6. (I know, you wrote five but oh well) Highlander and Mortal Kombat.
Why? Hmm, what do these two movie have in common...could it be Christopher
Lambert? Could be!


On 28 Sep 1999, Richard D Magrath wrote:

> It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
> research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts Club
> Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder Gods.

Nunya D. Bidness

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
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ZARDOZ?!
*lol*
Wasn't that the one with Magnum P.I. in it?


On 28 Sep 1999 22:55:37 GMT, goffsca...@aol.com.Furthur (Robert McKay) wrote:

>>Subject: The Thread Whose Name Cannot Be Spoken
>>From: ltri...@aol.com (Richard D Magrath)
>>Date: Tue, 28 September 1999 05:27 PM EDT
>

>>It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
>>research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts
>>Club
>>Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder
>>Gods.
>>And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five motion
>>picture experiences. Ta.
>

>I'm not much of a movie fan; I'm into books. But let me see if I even have
>five movies I could call favorites...
>
>1. *Interview With the Vampire*
>2. *The Wizard of Oz*
>3. *Once Upon a Time in the West*
>4. *A Fistful of Dollars*
>5. *Zardoz*
>
>Well whataya know!<g>
>
> Robert McKay/Raibeart MacAoidh
> AOL - Goffs California
> E-mail - goffsca...@aol.com
> I Ah hid a harn Ah'd be fell.

If marriage as outlawed, then only outlaws would have inlaws.


Dr. Necrophage

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
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In article <19990928172701...@ngol06.aol.com>,

ltri...@aol.com (Richard D Magrath) wrote:
> It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the
> name of scientific
> research I'd like to know what films the
> Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts Club
> Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a
> spammer to the Elder Gods.
> And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just
> your top five motion
> picture experiences. Ta.
> Richard D. Magrath
> LtRi...@aol.com

< delurk >

1. Alien/Aliens (tie)
2. Highlander
3. Baron Munchausen
4. Patton
5. The Matrix


Dr. Necrophage

'The Old Ones were, the Old Ones are, the Old Ones shall
be!'


< relurk >


* Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet's Discussion Network *
The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet - Free!


Mike Tice

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to

> It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
> research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts Club
> Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder Gods.
> And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five motion
> picture experiences. Ta.
>
> Richard D. Magrath
> LtRi...@aol.com

I hate this sort of thing, because I always discover that there are about
35 movies in my top ten. Let me take a stab at it, and see if it bleeds:

In no particular order:

Amadeus
Clockwork Orange
The Third Man
The Lady Vanishes
Brazil

Wait, wait ... Delicatessen, M, Lawrence of Arabia, Blade Runner, Strange
Days, The Thirty-Nine Steps, Cabaret, Alien, The Thing, Real Genius, City
of Lost Children, La Femme Nikita, Tampopo, His Girl Friday, Dirty Rotten
Scoundrels, The Nightmare Before Christmas ...

Aaauugh! It's impossible!

--Mike

Randy Money

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
Thanks, Mike. You express my sentiments perfectly. Lessee, if I were
to list favorites ...

My pre-1960, post-silent-era picks:
Drama: Citizen Kane
Mystery: The Maltese Falcon
Comedy: Duck Soup / His Girl Friday [depends on the day you ask]
Horror: The Body Snatchers (Karloff and Lugosi, no direct relation to
"Invasion of...") / The Curse of the Demon [depends on ...]
Sci Fi: The Thing (the original)

My post-1960 picks:
Drama: Raging Bull / Apocalypse Now [depends on ...]
Mystery: Charade / Goldfinger (depends...)
Comedy: The Three Musketeers / A Shot in the Dark / Dr. Strangelove
(depends...)
Horror: The Haunting / Halloween (depends...)
Sci Fi: 2001 / Star Wars (depends...) (I hate obvious answers, but
that's about the best I can do)


Then again, the original question said, "top five motion picture
experiences", and that might get a different answer:

Raging Bull
Apocalypse Now -- Both R.B. and A.N. left me emotionally worn out and
exhausted, so
much so that I haven't watched all of either since first seeing them.
Citizen Kane -- One of the few movies to live up to its rep.
Raiders of the Lost Ark -- First time I ever saw people literally
watching from the
edge of their seats.
The General (Buster Keaton) -- Until seeing this, I didn't know you
could laugh so hard at a silent movie.


I know. I cheated. I'm sorry.

Randy

James S Kang

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
Nunya D. Bidness (alphawehr...@hotmail.com) wrote:
> ZARDOZ?!
> *lol*
> Wasn't that the one with Magnum P.I. in it?

No, it was Sean Connery. And it was horrible. I saw it at a B-Fest, and even
as a laughably bad movie, it was insufferable, even though it had some funny
lines in the beginning.

> >1. *Interview With the Vampire*
> >2. *The Wizard of Oz*
> >3. *Once Upon a Time in the West*
> >4. *A Fistful of Dollars*
> >5. *Zardoz*

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

"They may be alive and well
when we find them, but
they'll be dead when we're
through with them!"

--Proverbs 1:12

http://carpal.corrupt.net

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Richard D Magrath

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
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In article <awardsgame-29...@ts41-9.wla.ts.ucla.edu>,
award...@aol.spam (Mike Tice) writes:

>Aaauugh! It's impossible!

Of course. This whole excericise was to get my revenge for having filled out
the What Are Your Top Three Movies? form on the Sky television homepage and
then changing my entire top 10 fifteen minutes later.

The current top 5, including reasons (which many of you left out, you crazy
crazy guys):

1. Blade Runner.
It's a film noir! It's science-fiction (my two favourite genres)! It has the
best soundtrack ever (scientifically proven) and is directed by fab Alien
director Ridley Scott! And it's really good too!

2. The 39 Steps
I love Hitchcock films and this must be one of his best. A brilliant retelling
of the original Buchan story with excellent plotting (the man with the missing
finger, who appears just as you've forgotten about him, giving you a big shock
(well me anyway)), memorable scenes (Hannay at the political conference) and
some of the best dialogue ever ("...His third Mother-in-law almost had him
arrested, but he killed her too.Took her on holiday to Land's End and pushed
her over the edge.").

3. Withnail and I
I still consider Richard E Grant's performance as the despairing actor Withnail
the best in any modern film, and this must be one of the most memorable films
ever made. Who can forget Withnail drinking lighter fluid, the Penrith tea
room, Uncle Monty or Danny the drug dealer? "I don't advise a haircut, man. All
hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the
brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight."

4. The Haunting

5. The Shawshank Redemption

(I couldn't be bothered giving reasons for the last two)

Richard D. Magrath
LtRi...@aol.com

Tom Liberman

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Sep 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/29/99
to
It is always difficult to narrow it down to five and who
knows what my answer might be next week but there will
always be a place in my heart for these five,

Rollerball (James Caan kicks corporate society ass!)
Lawrence of Arabia (Breathtaking)
Raiders of the Lost Ark (It's just so much fun)
The Right Stuff (Beautiful movie with great transition
sequences)
Citizen Kane (As good as it gets)


Richard D Magrath <ltri...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:19990928172701...@ngol06.aol.com...

Robert A Cappelletto

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Sep 30, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/30/99
to
2001
Apocalypse Now
The Thing
THE THING
Alien
Night of the Living Dead
Dawn of the Dead
Jaws
Fist Full of Dollars

Michael Bell

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Sep 30, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/30/99
to

These are not in any particular order.
1) SUSPIRIA
I've been known to pop the soundtrack to this in the CD player and hit
repeate when I'm at my drawing board.
2) Evil Dead, Evil Dead 2, Army of Darkness
I'm going to call these all one movie because I'm the only one I know
who can watch all three in a row.
3) Hellraiser
4) Re-Animator, Bride of Re-Animator, From Beyond
See the note for No. 2
5) Dead-Alive
6) The City of Lost Children
7) Braveheart
8) Taxi Driver
9) Highlander
10) Twelve Monkeys
I could go on and on.
-Mike


Greg Ellis

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Sep 30, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/30/99
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>On 28 Sep 1999, Richard D Magrath wrote:
>
>> It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
>> research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts
Club
>> Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder
Gods.
>> And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five
motion
>> picture experiences. Ta.
>>
>> Richard D. Magrath
>> LtRi...@aol.com
>>
>>


1) Deep Rising - Just because the whole movie's a real hoot (I'll never
forget the scene when the 2 guys shoot up the ballroom then look at their
guns and start shooting the ballroom up again).
2) Aliens - All out guns and glory action with a touch of dread thrown in
for good measure.
3) Alien - A great haunted house movie. Pure horror all the way.
4) In The Mouth Of Madness - Great HPL-inspired horror movie.
5) Tarantula - Simply because I really, really hate spiders and the thought
of a spider the size of a house+ gives me the willies.

Bonus Movie
6) The Giant Spider Invasion - Most of this film just plain sucks, but
there's one truly horrifying scene in it where a woman enters a garden shed,
walks to the far end, then turns around and sees a gigantic spider clinging
to the roof of the shed just over the door. She screams, the spider leaps,
the shot switches to the outside of the shed as the door slams shut. I still
get the shivers thinking og that scene.


armi...@berk.com

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Oct 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/2/99
to
In article <7sv93m$b9i$1...@news.internet-frontier.net>,

"Greg Ellis" <gne...@ifn.net> wrote:
> Bonus Movie
> 6) The Giant Spider Invasion - Most of this film just plain sucks, but
> there's one truly horrifying scene in it where a woman enters a garden
shed,
> walks to the far end, then turns around and sees a gigantic spider
clinging
> to the roof of the shed just over the door. She screams, the spider
leaps,
> the shot switches to the outside of the shed as the door slams shut. I
still
> get the shivers thinking og that scene.
>
ROFL.I'm sorry. I can't take that movie seriously ever since I watched
it on Mystery Science Theatre 3000. But you've got to love the giant
mechanical spider strapped to the roof of a car...and then driven behind
hills and crowds so you couldn't see the car. Meanwhile Mike and the
'bots are in the audience making car noises and car jokes. "I hear 1978
spiders get good gas mileage but the heaters don't work."

armi...@berk.com
"Well we almost all died and Johhny's out of his mind. Though we never
found Yig, we had a hell of a good time."-TDotHT


Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.

james ambuehl

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Oct 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/2/99
to
Hi Greg,

Ah, yes, I can definitely relate: I too have a deathly and unreasoning
fear of spiders! However, I did attempt to exorcise some of these
feelings, by killing myself off (death by spider!) in a story here on
the Net called "Atlachnaphobia"! It didn't entirely work, but at least
now I live in a relatively spider-free place now (whew!).

Anyway, the story appears in MYTHOS ONLINE # 6 (I think that's the issue
number) if anyone wants to read it . . .

-- Jim

Richard D Magrath

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Oct 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/2/99
to
In article <1901-37F...@newsd-243.iap.bryant.webtv.net>,
jamesa...@webtv.net (james ambuehl) writes:

>Hi Greg,
>
>Ah, yes, I can definitely relate: I too have a deathly and unreasoning
>fear of spiders! However, I did attempt to exorcise some of these
>feelings, by killing myself off (death by spider!) in a story here on
>the Net called "Atlachnaphobia"! It didn't entirely work, but at least
>now I live in a relatively spider-free place now (whew!).
>
>Anyway, the story appears in MYTHOS ONLINE # 6 (I think that's the issue
>number) if anyone wants to read it . . .
>
>-- Jim

I have actually done a scientific analysis on the subject of arachnophobia and
have come up with the following result:

Spiders are scary because they are NOT OF THIS EARTH. Think about it:

1 You have no spiders in your room. There is no way a spider could enter. Yet
the next day there is a HUGE one right above your head. Teleportation, you see.

2 There is a huge government cover-up over spiders. Therefore anyone scared of
said creatures who might possibly find out THE TRUTH is laughed at. If you have
agrophobia or claustrophobia everyone treats you like you have a terrible
mental illness and give you lots of sympathy. It is apparently wrong to laugh
at an agrophobe or claustrophobe yet it is perfectly fine to mock someone with
a fear of spiders. Shout "the walls are closing in!" at a claustrophobe and you
are a terrible unsensitive person. Shout "there's a spider crawling up your
leg!" at an arachnophobe and you are hilariously funny (apparently). Throwing a
spider at an arachnophobe is OK too.

3 Movement. Spiders who have just arrived from their own, lower gravity planet
move very slowly, but once they've adjusted to Earth gravity after about a week
they zip about like mad things. Mad things, I tell you!

4 Webs. Building webs out of thread ejected from your backside is not the way
we do things on THIS planet.

5 Also on webs, spiders like to build them indoors too, even when they've never
actually seen a fly in there. What is the point then? Answer: spiders do not
build webs to trap flies, they build them to trap PEOPLE.

6 Eight legs. Why? It's not like you'd need eight legs on EARTH, is it?

7 Going back to point 2, there is more evidence of a government-spider
conspiracy. Have you ever wondered why you can buy chemicals (sprays usually)
to kill wasps, ants, centipedes and all other kinds of bugs BUT NOT SPIDERS? In
fact, killing spiders is frowned on. Even in Ye Olden Days killing a spider was
branded unlucky, but now in modern times it is OK to kill flies and ants and
other things but spiders are 'harmless' and 'help the environment' even though
there are many deadly poisonous breeds of spider?

8 Scientists have claimed that spiders cannot grow to 50ft like in many horror
films yet haven't bothered trying to deny the existance of giant scorpions,
giant wasps and other giant invertebrae. This fact suggests they are LYING and
there are indeed human-eating 50ft spiders walking around somewhere in the
Arizona desert.

Richard D. Magrath
LtRi...@aol.com

james ambuehl

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Oct 3, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/3/99
to
Richard may well be right. I'm thinking now of the DOCTOR WHO story
PLANET OF THE SPIDERS, in which spiders do indeed teleport from their
world of Metebilis-3, and leap onto the backs of humans, and phase into
their spinal chords, thereby controlling the humans! Ugh!

Another scary thought: Nobody in their right mind wants to meet, and
get abducted by aliens into their UFO's, right? If we saw a Grey we
would definitely go the other way very fast (IF we could . . .). But .
. what if a UFO was filled with ten-foot SPIDERS! AAAGGGHHHH!!!!

Seriously, go read my story "Atlachnaphobia," if you've a mind to. It's
a Cthulhu Mythos story, as are nearly all of mine up to the point when I
started writing DOCTOR WHO (3 British anthology appearances already!),
and while not one of my strongest, solidly-Mythosian efforts, it is a
real creeper in it's own right!

Teaser: A man who has been forever plagued by the unwelcome visitations
of spiders, appeals to an occultic psychologist for aid. Dr. Raymond
Thulask finds the culprit at work, the spider-goddess and Mistress of
the Web, Atlach-Nacha and deals with the problem at hand . . . or DOES
he???

You can find it, and many other of my works (one of which was recently
published in THE ITHAQUA CYCLE), by going to:

http://www.toddalan.com/~berglund/
(After entering, go to the link for THE CTHULHU MYTHOS LISTINGS, and
look under my name (James Ambuehl).

-- Jim

PS -- Greg, that scene with the woman in the shed with the giant spider
on the ceiling in GIANT SPIDER INVASION scared the shit out of me too!
Man, am I ever awaiting that cool-sounding story you're sending me for
the Cthulhoid magazine I work for!

James E Goodzeit

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Oct 3, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/3/99
to
10 Best. Not necessarily in order, and somewhat volatile--there are lots of
films that I've really enjoyed, but space does not permit me to list them
all.

(1) Alien. This whole film is surrounded with such an aura of mystery and
awe that it still moves me to this day. (I was about 11 whan I saw it in the
theatre and didn't sleep for three nights, cowering in the middle of my bed
with all lights on.) Its sequel was also excellent, but it shed that
aura--the Xenomorph has become exactly what King describes as not being a
Lovecraftian horror in "The Mist".
(2) The Thing--John Carpenter's version. "You've got to be kidding."
(3) Destroy All Monsters. Wow! What a slugfest! Nothing gets the old adrenal
glands pumping like this!
(4) A Bridge Too Far. This is everything a great war movie should be--see
list below.
(5) Not Of This Earth. Roger Corman shows us all what impeccable taste he
has. Also stars Traci Lords, who has been in a number of other films worthy
of this list, but I will not name them in this forum.
(6) The Empire Strikes Back. Go ahead and flame me. I liked all the Star
Wars flicks--except for *Return of the Jedi*, which was pretty sucky.
(7) Xtro. On a budget comparable with the Blair Witch project, this has to
be one of the oddest alien abduction tales ever filmed.
(8) Blood Sucking Freaks. Very Sadean, very kinky. It does fall short of de
Sade's ideal in two points however: Ralphus and Sardu are too squeemish for
the Doctor's little operation, and--Moralistically--they are met with
dispatch in the end.
(9) Conan the Barbarian. This is *the* great barbarian flik. Too bad none
has folled in its footsteps.
(10) Monty Python and the Holy Grail. The 80's was the Golden Age of comedy;
not the least of which was the good old Python crew.

I'm still waiting to see the great Lovecraft film--though I confess I
haven't seen *Return to Innsmouth* yet. Since I've listed what I think are
the 10 best films, I think it is appropriate that I also list the 10 worst.
Unlike the 10 best, this list may be regarded an etched in granite.

(1) Godzilla--American Version. Wimpy overgrown stego-raptor goes to
Manhattan. Trashiest monster movie I ever saw--and I've seen a lot.
(2) Saving Private Ryan. With its paper thin plot and mediocre acting, this
is somehow hailed as 'The War Movie of the Century'? The special effects
were, indeed, awsome, but some of my friends in the military like to point
out, there were some gross inaccuracies. What is most disturbing of all is
that Spielberg only made this film to drive home his thesis that a 'German'
and a 'Nazi' always have and always will refer to a single entity; Germans
are no more human than the bugs from *Starship Troopers* or the invaders
from *Independance Day*.
(3) Good Morning Vietnam. Robin Williams' wit is certainly overrated. But
what makes this film truly offensive is that he should be guilty of capital
treason, yet he has the temerity to make a Vietnam flick. I'm surprised good
ol' Hanoi Jane didn't also star in this effronery, or did she? It's been a
while.
(4) Independance Day. Never before has such willful stupidity been
perpetrated against a movie audience.
(5) Batman--Michael Keaton version, not to be confused with the movie of the
same name starring Adam West and Burt Ward, which is, by the way excellent.
I am told that the sequels are even worse. Needless to say, I don't intend
to verify that statement.
(6) Pulp Fiction. This rigmarole is dubbed artistic? Creative? Quenten only
shows us that he is a ripoff artist, and not a very good one at that. Go
back to your video rental store, Quenten.
(7) Bullworth. The world's longest campaign ad also must surely be the most
disgustingly hypocritical and self serving there ever was. Oh, and rap is
crap--where's Curt Hennig when we need him?
(8) E.T. With *Jaws* and *Close Encounters* one would believe that the young
Steven Spielberg were embarking on a brilliant film making carreer. Alas,
such optimism could not have been more wrong.
(9) Kull the Conqueror. Casting that pretty-boy wuss Kevin Sorbo as REH's
hero works as well as casting Woody Allen. And now they're talking about
making a Solomon Kane flik with that same geek. Arrgh! Can someone find out
some more info--maybe if we all make a concerted effort in writing letters
of protest.
(10) [Insert your favorite sappy love story here.]


Yr. obt. Servt.
JEG

James E Goodzeit

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Oct 3, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/3/99
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Here I go piggyback on my own post. Any list of the 10 worst films ever
*must* include _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_. Incidentally, the actor
who plays the lead role also plays the lead role in one of the 10 *best*
films ever made--Xtro.

Yr. obt. Servt.
JEG


C. P. Bell

unread,
Oct 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/4/99
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Actually, I fantasized quite a lot throughout my youth about getting
abducted by aliens. Although I still feared the concept too, it was weird.
I didn't much care for the idea of them doing painful experimentations on me
like that poor fellow in FIRE IN THE SKY. And the show SIGHTINGS just
completely racked my nerves!! However, I always hoped I'd get abducted and
they'd telepathically communicate with and tell me about their world and how
much they like reading Lovecraft and go into detailed discussions about the
Mythos, like that time I was talking to my friend Rachel about Lovecraft the
day after she had to get new glasses because her old ones broke and at the
same time her job was being even more harder on her because of this major
merger going on and where was I going with this?....

Yr most hble & obt alien:
C. P. Bell

YrObtServtCPBell.vcf

Richard D Magrath

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Oct 4, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/4/99
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In article <Pine.GSO.3.96.991003...@everest.cse.Buffalo.EDU>,

And Richard O' Brien later starred as Mr Hand in Dark City.

Richard D. Magrath
LtRi...@aol.com

Miss Felicity

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Oct 5, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/5/99
to
Richard D Magrath wrote:
>
> It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of
> scientific research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu
> Lonely Hearts Club Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a
> spammer to the Elder Gods. And why, of course. It doesn't have to be
> horror, just your top five motion picture experiences. Ta.

1. Wings of Desire
2. Monty Python's Holy Grail
3. Henry V (Branagh version)
4. The Dark Crystal (absolutely blew my mind when I first saw it)
5. Paperhouse (really, really scary in a not particularly obvious way)

Miss Felicity

David M Jacobs

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Oct 6, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/6/99
to
On 28 Sep 1999 21:27:01 GMT, ltri...@aol.com (Richard D Magrath)
wrote:

>It's psychological evaluation time again, and in the name of scientific
>research I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts Club
>Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder Gods.
>And why, of course. It doesn't have to be horror, just your top five motion
>picture experiences. Ta.

My list is more-or-less as follows, although the last four tend to
swap positions depending on my mood:

1. Apocalypse Now -- I describe it as a "whacko road movie" -- the
protagonist slowly descends into madness as he travels up the river.
He also becomes exactly the same as that which he was sent to kill --
suitably Nietzschean for my liking.

2. Citizen Kane -- An indepth character study of William Randolph
Hearst with a moral, that money doesn't make a person happy. Perhaps
once I've made my first billion, I'll start to hate the film #%o). I
also liked how the "Rosebud" issue was never resolved (IRL, it was
Hurst nickname for his mistress' *ahem* feminine organs).

3. Cinema Paradiso -- I'm a Fellini fan, no doubt, but also a romantic
at heart (hooboy, a romantic on a.h.c.?!).

4. Rushmore -- It's been a while since I've seen a lead character
that's so complex. I found myself intensely liking and hating him,
simultaneously.

5. The City of Lost Children -- I love the old-style fairytale-like
story. Jeunet, Caro and Gaultier give the whole thing a great,
surreal atmosphere.


David M Jacobs
-- dmja...@zipworld.com.au --
-- ICQ UIN: 17027598 --
Long Pork Sandwich: http://www.zipworld.com.au/~dmjacobs
========================================================
"You want to talk to me about God? God is dead,
baby. Wake up and smell the Nietzsche."
========================================================

jim boyle

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Oct 6, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/6/99
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Here goes... in no particular order becuase i am awfully tired...

Braveheart: what more could you ask for??? medieval warfare, romance, over the top
drama, executions, etc.

Outlaw Josie Wales (or sometimes Unforgiven)-- as a lover of westerns, i
appreciate one that is a little more than one good guy, 65 bad guys and the pistol
that never runs out of ammo and the ending consisting of 65 dead bodies.

Alien: a haunted house movie with the house as a spaceship and the "haunt" as a
killing machine... wow, first time i saw this was really an amazing experience,
Giger's book on the development of the art work is really interesting as well. i
gotta get the DVD for the extra footage mentioned elsewhere in this NG.

Natural Born Killers: such a well made movie that really is innovative.. sure, the
violence has been done before, but not with an utter lack of a meaning behind
it... complete nihlism, refreshing for a change.

Dune: my favorite Sci-Fi book and movie of all time (i consider alien to be more
horror than sci-fi, despite its setting)... with such a complex book, with such
vivid characters, the movie was a challenge to adapt for the screen... In my
opinion, you have to read the book first, or you will have a very hard time
following the movie, at least I did...Actually just got this in MPEG format for my
computer.. havent watched through yet...

Notable other:

Star wars: A new hope.
2001: A Space Odessy
Easy Rider
Shawshank Redemption
Full Metal Jacket, Platoon
Exorcist
Psycho
Hell Raiser I
The MAtrix (if you can ignore all of the dialogue...)

many others, can think of them now...

jim


Haggis

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Oct 11, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/11/99
to
>I'd like to know what films the Alt.Horror.Cthulhu Lonely Hearts Club
> Band likes to watch when they are not sacrificing a spammer to the Elder
Gods.
> Richard D. Magrath

Not in order:

Star Wars - no comment
Yojimbo - you may know it as A Fistful of Dollars. The original, as usual,
is better.
Seven Samurai - remade as The Magnificent Seven
Gone with the Wind - the epic
Apocalypse Now - no comment

Films to see after a couple of beers (Britsh beer)
Bad Taste - very funny
Jacob's Ladder - the ending still won't make sense, but you won't care
Leningrad Cowboys Go America
Dark Star

Haggis

Daniel Alan Ross

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Oct 12, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/12/99
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"Haggis" <hag...@haggis30.freeserve.co.uk> wrote:

> Yojimbo - you may know it as A Fistful of Dollars. The original, as
usual,
> is better.

Have you seen "Last Man Standing"? Even with Bruce Willis I actually
liked it better than Fistful, but of course nothing comes close to
Kurosawa's original.

Speaking of which, have you seen "Sanshiro Sugata"? Another excellent
Kurosawa movie with a couple of similar themes to "Yojimbo", but not as
funny.
--
Daniel
"The Voice of the Mountains"
The Life and Writings of Manly Wade Wellman
http://members.dencity.com/wellman

Haggis

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Oct 13, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/13/99
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Daniel Alan Ross <daniel_a...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:7u035i$9m0$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...

> Have you seen "Last Man Standing"? Even with Bruce Willis I actually
> liked it better than Fistful, but of course nothing comes close to
> Kurosawa's original.

No.

> Speaking of which, have you seen "Sanshiro Sugata"?

No again.
I believe Kurosawa made a film called Hidden Fortress which Star Wars bears
some notable similarities to.
This is getting way off topic so I'll say no more.

Haggis


james ambuehl

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Oct 18, 1999, 3:00:00 AM10/18/99
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(Re: Kurosawa's HIDDEN FORTRESS):

This isn't that god-awful MESSAGE FROM SPACE, is it? Ugh! Probably the
worst movie I've ever seen . . . after perhaps CTHULHU MANSION.

-- Jim

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