I've had pretty good luck putting all the actions (including the delete) inside the button. For instance, this seems to work:
\define actions()
<$action-deletetiddler $tiddler="DeleteMe" />
<$action-setfield $tiddler="MakeMe" text="Hi! How are you?"/>
\end
<$button>Do stuff<<actions>>
</$button>
You should share the action-widgets you're using and how you have them set up. More importantly, you might indicate exactly *what* you want to do.
Good luck!
Mark