I think Peter White's webpage is pretty useful (for the most part...) -- see for example
https://www.peterwhitecycles.com/plight.php -- and there's often very useful photos of small bits if you poke around more. His labor prices are extremely good for the quality of his work, and if you're looking for a new wheel along with a light, it's a great one-stop-shop. He'll talk you through all your choices on the phone in case you're uncertain about anything.
But the short answer to your first set of questions is: SON hubs are widely agreed to be the very best, but they come at a cost premium. There's several manufacturers that, these days, are only very slightly below that in quality (including Shutter Precision, Shimano, and Panasonic; I feel like I'm forgetting one more). For lights, it seems like the Busch and Muller IQ-X is a fav (I love mine), but there's a couple others that belong in the very top category as well (Schmidt Edelux II, Sinewave Cycles Beacon), and I don't have personal experience to compare (I'm sure others here do). For rear lights (which can be linked easily to a front light), the Busch and Muller Toplight Line Plus is, I believe, the clear number one.
Good luck and enjoy!
-Sam