Hey Erik,
It seems that /_ah/stop is only appearing as a signal in your logs once a shutdown event has occurred, either due to normal events, such as an idle timeout or a call to the Modules service, or due to instance failure.
In the other thread you linked, Michael from Firebase indicated that you can use one of their methods to attempt to shut down all the Firebase threads. This should prevent your instances from staying up due to idle background threads. Have you managed to attempt this, and did it work for you?
You were, though, more generally, looking for a way to start and stop instances in manual / basic scaling. Looking at the Modules service documentation (see
Java's javadoc, note that
python's methods are parallel), there are methods to set and get the number of instances in a version/module, and methods to start and stop all instances in a version/module, but no methods for individual control.
You should feel free to file a
Feature Request in the Public Issue Tracker for App Engine. You could also engineer various work-arounds, such as using Managed VMs, which can start and stop in a more controlled manner, also allowing process control, listing of threads, etc.
Let me know how this goes for you.