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Why did the Rabbit keep the bribe... for a bit ?

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Catherine

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May 10, 2000, 3:00:00 AM5/10/00
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That day, Pat, the gentle and fluffy little daddy bunny rabbit,
was in really good form. The sun was shining,the grass was
green, and the pretty flowers were blossoming all over. Having
been served his usual breakfast of carrots and lettuce by his
equally gentle and fluffy rabbit wife, he read his daily copy of
the Irish Warren. The polls were good for the Busy Burrowing
Rabbit Party, his party... because, you see, Pat the Bunny was a
politician rabbit, and he was slap bang in the middle of a busy
election campaign.
Just as he was about to don his election rosette to go
canvassing the neighbouring burrows, nests, badger sets and
other warrens, a loud knock was heard at the entrance of the
burrow.
"Hello ! Anyone there ?" a voice bellowed outside. "I'm
coming, I'm coming, keep your fur on" Pat's wife squeeked as she
shuffled up to the entrance of the dark tunnel. "Paaaaat !" she
shouted. "It's for you !" "It's Franky the Weasel!".
Folding the Irish Warren reluctantly (because the pie chart
showing just how well his party was doing did make for pleasant
contemplation), Pat the Bunny went out to talk to Franky.
Franky was bad news. A shifty sort.
"Well, hello Pat ! It is nice to see you on this fine day" Pat
just frowned, thinking there was no better plamasser than Franky
when he was up to no good.
"What do you want ?" Pat the Bunny said gruffly ?
"Well, I thought to myself the other day.. well.. Pat is going
to need some help with this election of his," Franky started,
beating around the bush as he often did. "So, I figured, what
would be more useful to him than a good brown paper sack full of
nice juicy carrots to keep his energy up during this exhausting
canvas !!" he continued "And I don't even expect ANYTHING from
you in return !!"
Pat's eyebrows were rising increasingly high (yes, bunny rabbits
DO have eyebrows). He smelled a rat.. and while a rodent
himself, he just didn't like this... But you don't upset the
weasel.. anyone who has read the Wind in the Willows knows
that ! And Pat the Bunny knew his classics.
"Yeah, well, hum, er.. thanks, now... I've got to go canvas"
said Pat... He quickly grabbed the brown paper sack of carrots,
threw it into the burrow, and walked out as fast as he could, to
avoid having to make small talk with Franky the Weasel.
In his hurry, he didn't say anything to his wife about the sack
of carrots.

Later that morning, Patricia the Mummy bunny rabbit, wife of
Pat, got a phone call from the Bunny vicar's wife. She was
organising a charity fund raising event for those poor
unfortunate asylum seeking racoons (yeah, you don't see many of
them in Ireland, but more and more,with those failing emigration
laws of ours !!) which the local forest council is accommodating
in a disused badger set.
Patricia thought this was an excellent idea indeed, and an
accomplished baker, she immediately volunteered her very best
carrot cake for a cake sale. "Marvelous !!" the vicar's wife
said !!
When she found the brown paper bag of carrots, Patricia thought
with great delight that there was enough carrots in there to
sell cakes and house half of the inhabitants of racoonland !!
Thrilled, she baked and baked and baked... her cakes sold well,
er.. like hot cakes, actually. The vicar's wife's fundraising
event went swimmingly, as the otter, who had organised a
sponsored karaoke night on the river bank, put it.

When Pat the Bunny Politician came home that night, exhausted
from having told badgers, ferrets, owls and voles JUST what they
wanted to hear, and a bit pished for having called in the Fox
and Geese on his way home to meet the other Bunny lads, he had
entirely forgotten about Franky the Weasel's carrots.

To cut a long story short (because it's getting late, and I want
to hit the hay soon), it's not until 3 weeks later that he
remembered. Having given out shite to Patricia, and having
consulted the Chief Bunny in the Busy Burrowing Rabbit Party, as
well as the Head Carrot Counter, he decided he really should
return those carrots to Franky. But how ? Now, they had been
grated, and baked, and sold for charity !! (Albeit for those
stinky lay-about racoons !!)
But then the Head Carrot Counter Bunny had a wonderful idea. He
took his best Goose nib, licked it and dipped it his great big
pot of black ink. Then, in his best Bunny paw-writing, he wrote
in large, beautiful letters: "I, Pat the Bunny Rabbit, owe
Franky the Weasel, one large brown paper bag of juicy carrots".
Pat could not see how a piece of paper was the same as the
carrots. But the Head Carrot Counter Bunny was a very clever
rodent, and he explained that the writing REPRESENTED the
carrots, and was therefore the same. By sending back the note
to Franky, it would be the same as if he had never taken the
carrots.
Pat the Bunny still could not get his little rodent head with
the long ears around this idea... but it sounded like it would
make it all alright, and sure he would send the note back.

So, there you have it. Pat the Bunny just forgot about it
because he was dead busy canvassing for the election, and it was
really all Patricia's fault, and he did sent back a note that
was the same as the carrots, and.. and... surely, he's not as
bad as the other otters, badgers and ferrets who accepted the
tonnes of carrots and NEVER send back even a note !!!

Cat(h)(the Beatrix Potter of the Flood Tribunal)

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KateH

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May 11, 2000, 3:00:00 AM5/11/00
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Catherine wrote ...

> That day, Pat, the gentle and fluffy little daddy bunny rabbit,
> was in really good form.
>(snipped)

> So, there you have it. Pat the Bunny just forgot about it
> because he was dead busy canvassing for the election, and it was
> really all Patricia's fault, and he did sent back a note that
> was the same as the carrots, and.. and... surely, he's not as
> bad as the other otters, badgers and ferrets who accepted the
> tonnes of carrots and NEVER send back even a note !!!
>
> Cat(h)(the Beatrix Potter of the Flood Tribunal)

Is this a sequel to Ray's bunny story.............?
Well done, Cath!
KateH :)


Catherine

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May 12, 2000, 3:00:00 AM5/12/00
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