Lieutenant Commander Lael Rosek: A Depth of Insight

[Lieutenant Commander Lael Rosek]

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((Beta Quadrant, Par’tha Expanse, USS Atlantis, Deck 6, Holodeck 1))

Rosek: ::worries her lip:: ~Given how badly this could turn out for you if something goes wrong, I understand if you don’t think it’s a good idea, but...dance with me?~

Raga: ~I think there's something wrong, my season has never been this bad. But my mental exercises have calmed it a bit. ::He briefly looked away from her apprehensively:: I don't know how to dance. And being that close, is that wise?~

Rosek: ~No pressure. I won’t try anything, I promise.~ ::smiles:: ~I’ll keep my hands and all other parts of me respectable. I just...even if we can’t be that for each other, I’d like it very much if we could be friends. And friends dance, don’t they?~

Raga: ~Friends. If you don't mind me likely stepping on your feet, sure. ::He considered something a moment:: Can you handle being that close to me? It's difficult for me not to project my thoughts, and that close you'd certainly have to worry about the pheromones.~

Rosek: ~I have my mental shields raised, so I can block what I’m feeling and thinking.~ ::pauses:: ~As far as the pheromones...I won’t breathe too deeply. I don’t know if you can manage the same, but--~

Raga: ~Very well.~

::Her heart missed a beat when he agreed, a lump forming in her throat. She could barely breathe as the excitement of finally getting to enjoy his company without anyone interrupting threatened to overwhelm her. When she saw him moving toward her, she exhaled a shaky breath and moved to meet him, using the time to gather her wits.::

::As she drew nearer, the familiar sensations from earlier returned and she had to remind herself to breathe shallow so that she didn’t take in too much of the chemical. This would give her more time before they began to affect her beyond her tolerance. It was difficult not to focus solely on him. His very presence filled the room, most especially the way his mind touched hers. She could have cried for how good it felt. He was a rock in a turbulent sea, despite the war he was fighting in his mind and body.::

::His blue eyes were so deep and so filled with emotion, she feared she’d drown in them. What his calm expression didn’t show, his eyes betrayed. Black hair hung about his face, making his eyes seem impossibly bluer. The white of the dress uniform was a stark contrast. She couldn’t help thinking how devastatingly handsome he looked in it. The jacket was tailored to fit and did him immense favors, highlighting his toned upper body.::

Rosek: ::moistens her lips nervously:: o0I am in so much trouble. 0o

Raga: So..how exactly does one dance?

::It took Lael’s brain a few moments to catch up.::

Rosek: ::pauses:: Well, first--we need music.

::As if on cue, the beginning strains of Three Doors Down’s “Your Arms Feel Like Home”. A slight flush filled Lael’s cheeks as she recalled the lyrics. It was a classical alternative song from Earth’s 21st century and she was surprised to hear it. She’d thought she was one of the few that listened to that particular genre and era. She chewed on her lower lip for a moment before grabbing his left hand with hers and placing he​r free hand on his shoulder while trying to keep a respectable distance between them.::

Rosek: ~Normally, you’d place your other hand on my waist. But it might be safer if you placed it between my shoulder blades.~

::The warmth of his hand as he followed her suggestion had her suppressing a shiver and she fought the temptation to move closer until the distance between their bodies was non-existent. But she held her position, her gaze locking with his.::

::Though she was managing to keep her own emotions to herself, his were battering at her defenses, making it hard to keep her composure. She could hear the rapid, harsh rhythm of his heart and her own seemed to pick up, matching his. He followed her lead in keeping the distance between them.::

Raga: ~Alright. What now?~

::She usually took the lead when dancing with an inexperienced partner. It’s what she’d done with Chythar when she first started teaching him to dance. But something about Toryn was telling her that he should lead.::

Rosek: ::smiles sheepishly:: ~Um...just follow the music. Whatever you do, I’ll follow.~

Raga: ~Are you sure? I..well, I've never done this before..but I'll try.~

::The fingers of her right hand laced with his as they began to move to the music. He was stiff in his movements and the tension between them was obvious. The distance made this more awkward than it really should have been, but she knew it was for their own good. The direction of her thoughts and the subconscious way she leaned toward him were dangerous.::

;:Despite her best attempts to keep her body’s reaction under control, her heart thudded against her ribcage, the blood rushing in her ears. Her gaze flickered to his lips. As much as she knew it would be a bad idea, she was sorely tempted to close the distance between them and kiss him, to hell with the consequences. Her body thrummed with awareness of his so close, so undeniably male.::

Rosek: o0 No. 0o

::She shut down the thoughts, but made no move away from him, forcing herself to focus on something else.::

Rosek: ~You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to...but what happened during your last mission that Com--Captain Brell saw fit to award you a Purple Heart?~

::She felt a not unexpected wash of grief and discomfort from him, the way their hands were woven resulting in her catching some of his memories of the incident.::

Raga: ~On our way back to the station from our last shore leave we were attacked out of nowhere. Atlantis was rammed by a vessel that could pass through our shields. Disabled us with an energy pulse of some kind. It was a troop ship that unleashed an overwhelming horde of mechanical spiders. They cut through the hull.~

::It was like watching a horror movie. The creatures attacking. Seeing people cut apart. The fear that she’d be next. She was merely an observer, having not been present for the attack, but she felt everything as though she’d been right by his side through the whole ordeal, her empathic gifts ensuring she was hit with the full magnitude of each moment.::

Raga: ~They overran our ship, hundreds of hull breaches...I saw one of the crew killed in front of me.~ ::He shuddered, eyes closing but feet moving as if by auto pilot:: ~Cut apart by the same laser that the bot used to cut its way into the ship.~

::She sucked in a quiet breath as her eyes met his, the emotion shining there along with the moisture forming catching her off guard. He was opening himself to her completely, allowing his deepest hurts to hang freely and it was a humbling experience. She’d lived her entire life by the phrase “Don’t let them see you cry”. When she had in the past, people had mistaken her for a weak person...someone to be pushed around and taken advantage of. But looking at Toryn, she saw him as anything but weak.::

Raga: ~Williams and I managed to get through the tubes to the shuttle bay. We had to blow our way out of the ship. Each of us in a shuttle. We managed to turn things in our favor a bit but I was so distracted with trying to save the ship I never heard them behind me.~

::As she listened to him tell the story, she moved closer, tightening her grip on his hand, anchoring him. She gave him the space to experience his feelings, all the while providing a soft background hum of calm and warmth. Even as she saw from his perspective the bot tearing into his shuttle, severing his arm, she held steady. Her thumb drew small circles

​over the back of his

, the hand on his shoulder moving to cup the back of his neck, massaging gently.::

Raga: ~Nearly lost my arm...I've been told it will recover in time.~

::She used the hand on his neck to encourage him closer, her body brushing against his. Caught up in the slow, steady rhythm of the music and the feeling of his warm breath on her forehead, the urges faded into the background as the instinctive need to comfort him took priority.

​ The hand cupping the back of his neck slid down to his chest, careful to keep her touch gentle so she didn't startle him.::

::She shivered as she felt the solid wall of hard muscle beneath her hand. Every inch of him radiated strength. She was only half Al-Leyan and her physical strength scared her. He was a full-blooded Al-Leyan male. She could scarcely fathom the full measure of his strength were he to let it lose. It should have scared her...but it didn't. She felt safe in his arms. Protected.::

::And yet all of that strength hid a man who was uncertain and hurting. Even without reaching beyond where he allowed her in his mind, she knew that. Lowering her mental shields slightly, she projected acceptance and calm, attempting to soothe the open wound that festered inside of him like a predator, threatening to consume him. Her hand returned to the back of his neck, her fingers tickling the hairs there.::

Rosek: ::whispers:: ~You’re so

​brave

, Toryn. You’ve been through so much. Endured so much.~

::She brought the hand laced with hers to her lips and

​she brushed a kiss

across his fingers, her gaze remaining locked with his. God, but this man was beautiful...even in his torment. How could he not see it? How could he not understand the level of emotional strength it took to face what he had and not give in completely

​to the raging storm of emotions it caused

?::

Rosek: ::murmurs:: ~I don’t know all the things you’ve been through, but I see a man with true strength. The kind of strength a lot of people never understand much less have for themselves. You hurt, but you don’t let it stop you from doing amazing things...from helping and protecting your friends and your crewmates.~

Raga: ~RESPONSE~

Rosek: ::kisses his cheek:: ~You’re worth it. You’re a good man, Toryn. It’s about time you let yourself start believing that.~

Raga: ~RESPONSE~

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Lieutenant Commander Lael Rosek, Eng.D.

Engineering Officer

USS Veritas NCC-95035

I238110RH0

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https://wiki.starbase118.net/wiki/index.php/Lael_Rosek