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UNIX/other OS jokes

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Z -Master

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Oct 1, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/1/95
to

If you ever thought of how UNIX or other OS's display error messages
containing parameters of what you entered, it can be somewhat
amusing...for example, on the Deltamatic System Delta uses for its
worldwide airline info system, I entered

YESS
as a joke to waste time pretending to talk to the system, and it replied
NO START ADDRESS

I'm sure there ones funnier than that, and if you have any UNIX/OS jokes
of that sort, send 'em in.
--
*------------------------------------------------------------------------*
| Zachery Paul Gaskins |
| Snail-Mail: 31088 Georgia Tech Station, Atlanta GA 30332 |
| Internet: gt1...@prism.gatech.edu |
| "If you took every inch of blood vessel in your body and wrapped it |
| around the earth 5 times...you'd die a horrible, nasty death." - Anon |
*------------------------------------------------------------------------*

Norman DeMattos

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Oct 1, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/1/95
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In <44mg7t$p...@catapult.gatech.edu> gt1...@acmex.gatech.edu (Z
--*
How about this one:

One day Bill Gates, Bill Clinton and Gorbachov were called by St Peter
up to the pearly gates. He told them that God was upset and was going
to destroy the world on Friday. The three were to go back to the earth
and prepare their people for the end.

Gorbachov went back to Russia and told his people: "I have bad news and
worse news. The bad news is that I have seen God with my own eyes.
The worse news is that the world will end on Friday."

Bill Clinton went back to the USA and got on TV and announced: "I have
good news and bad news. The good news is that I have seen God with my
own eyes. The bad news is that the world will end on Friday."

Bill Gates went back to Microsoft and got on the MSnetwork and
announced: "I have good news and great news. The good news is that I
have seen God with my own eyes. The great news is that on Friday, IBM
will stop shipping OS/2."

Jouko Valta

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Oct 7, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/7/95
to
Z -Master <gt1...@acmex.gatech.edu> writes:
Z> If you ever thought of how UNIX or other OS's display error


twtwm: line 55: Permission error: syntax error denied.


--j;

jopi@{stekt,zombie,paju}.oulu.fi //Game Programmer's FTP x2ftp.oulu.fi
International Palindromes http://stekt.oulu.fi:/~jopi/humor/palindromes.html
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
This article is made using Ammerican spell(1)'ing, European calendar, ISO
standards, Swedish alphabetics and native punctuation rules. All electrons
100% recycled. No Intel or msdos contamination. Not tested on animals. (-:

Dorfman Dan

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Oct 14, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/14/95
to
Along the lines of UNIX humor, here are two oldies:

(i) % make -f love
make: Fatal error: Can't find `love': No such file or directory

(ii) % ar m God
ar: God does not exist

That's SunOS for you...
Dan.

---
Dan Dorfman <dor...@math.tau.ac.il> Tel: (home) +972 3 6135621
Tarpav st. 3/10 (work) +972 3 9684424
Ramat-Gan 52503, Israel

Michael William Ledoux

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Oct 15, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/15/95
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In article <45opge$k...@post.tau.ac.il> dor...@lune.math.tau.ac.il (Dorfman Dan) writes:
>Along the lines of UNIX humor, here are two oldies:
>
>(i) % make -f love
> make: Fatal error: Can't find `love': No such file or directory

Even better, under ULTRIX:
% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.

mike.

Michael Stutz

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Oct 18, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/18/95
to

In a previous article, jvoo...@compiler.tdcnet.nl (J.S. van Oosten) says:

>Dorfman Dan (dor...@lune.math.tau.ac.il) wrote:
>: Along the lines of UNIX humor, here are two oldies:

%Hey UNIX, got a match?
No match.

#cat food_in_cans
cat: cannot find food_in_cans

Trevor Stone

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Oct 21, 1995, 3:00:00 AM10/21/95
to
my favorite is
%rm God
God nonexistant

or maybe
%[ whereis waldo
Missing ].
--
Trevor Stone Perfessoinal Perspectivologist
tst...@bvsd.k12.co.us tst...@nyx.cs.du.edu
<em>Check Out My Homepage At http://bvsd.k12.co.us/~tstone</em>
My opinions are mine. Anybody who claims them will be sued.

eric.we...@gmail.com

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Apr 28, 2017, 3:26:52 PM4/28/17
to
On Sunday, October 1, 1995 at 2:00:00 AM UTC-5, Z -Master wrote:
> If you ever thought of how UNIX or other OS's display error messages
> containing parameters of what you entered, it can be somewhat
> amusing...for example, on the Deltamatic System Delta uses for its
> worldwide airline info system, I entered
>
> YESS
> as a joke to waste time pretending to talk to the system, and it replied
> NO START ADDRESS
>
> I'm sure there ones funnier than that, and if you have any UNIX/OS jokes
> of that sort, send 'em in.
> --
> *------------------------------------------------------------------------*
> | Zachery Paul Gaskins |
> | Snail-Mail: 31088 Georgia Tech Station, Atlanta GA 30332 |
> | Internet: gt1...@prism.gatech.edu |
> | "If you took every inch of blood vessel in your body and wrapped it |
> | around the earth 5 times...you'd die a horrible, nasty death." - Anon |
> *------------------------------------------------------------------------*

As of 4-28-2017, the only one of these that works is `ar m God` which yields "ar: creating God"
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