[Ranma][Fanfic] My So-Called Half-Life

[Geoff Tebbetts]

*** Moderate warning and precautions ***

This story is not an actual story from Ranma 1/2, nor does it have
anything to really do with "My So-Called Life", except to be an
appropriate title to borrow and modify. True, this is a little of both,
but by no means is it a crossover.
All concepts of Ranma 1/2 and the small cameo role are property of
Rumiko Takahashi and the like. All other characters are copywritten and
property of myself.
As a slight warning, this story is an explicit story. This story does
contain some violent nature, as well as adult situations. While it is not
an actual *lemon* series, there are some sexual references and situation.
Consider your audience before showing it to them.
In other words, it's probably Rated åR'...

____________________________
My So-Called Half-Life
A Biography In Pieces
Fanfiction by Geoff Tebbetts
____________________________

Part One

I rinsed myself free of soap as quickly as I could. I hated gym
classes at my new high school, especially around the time showering came.
Then, it'd be putting on the uniform, going to classes the rest of the
day, and making out of school intact. Don't get me wrong. I'm not
paranoid of company, but it's the little white lies that get you in
trouble.
I could hear the beginning of the migration to the showers, so,
naturally, I gulped quickly. I quickly got the shampoo out of my short
hair and turned to turn my shower off. Before I could even bat an
eyelash, two girls had already entered, laughing and joking among
themselves. I flipped the cold water off and grabbed a towel.
"Kariko!" one of the pair noticed. "You're done with your shower
already? Half the class is still in their gym clothes!"
I flashed a secretive laugh at the two, waving a hand. "I...like to
devote more of my time straightening up!" I stammered. "I'm just like
that, I guess! Pardon me..."
I walked past the two as they were taking their towels off from around
them. I gulped again and was glad the cold water pipes weren't busted. I
could distinctly hear the red-headed one say to the other how I could
describe myself.
"She spends so much time straightening up, yet she doesn't date..."
"Weird girl..."
I sighed and spread out my seifuku uniform in front of me. Every day
of my life, I hated this part. The skirt was bad enough, but the bra and
panties? I twitched and writhed when I wore them, and the other girls
would laugh at me if I had dressed wrong. It was no secret that I was a
bit of a tomboy to my friends; I wore nothing but jeans and dark shirts
outside of classes. I refused to wear any more skirts or dresses.
I had my undergarments on, when one of my better friends, Satori,
approached me after her brief shower. "Hi, Kariko!" she chirped to me in
a melodious voice.
I snapped my bra on and waved to her with a stray hand. "Hi, Satori!"
I smiled. Instantly, my bra unsnapped from my unartistic job of getting
dressed. I sighed, as Satori giggled.
"You're such a tomboy, Kari-chan!" she laughed. "You can't even get
dressed like a girl. Here, I'll get it for you." She obligingly snapped
it on correctly, and I sighed again before proceeding to slip my skirt
on. Satori herself began to dress, but I made sure not to make eye
contact with her.
"Didn't your mother ever teach you how to do that?" Satori asked me.
"Not...really..." I stuttered. "She keeps demanding for me to do it
myself and learn the hard way. I guess I just have to practice."
"She really ought to, you know," Satori noted. "You're 17! That's the
age where girls become women!"
I stuck out my tongue and pulled my eyelid down. "What do you know
about becoming a woman, Satori?" I shot back. "You haven't even confessed
to having a boyfriend yet."
I oopsed to myself as Satori glared at me. Bad example.
"Er, never mind..."
I put on my seifuku quickly and straightened it out between locker room
laughter and chatter. The white uniform did fit me for a change, but I
bleahed at the red bow and blue skirt in the mirror. I even hated the
tight-fitting shoes and socks. Whoever the guy was that created seifukus,
he must have been the biggest perv.
I popped out a brush and started to rake my unusually blue-green hair
back. Many girls in my class were a little weirded out by my appearance,
saying to me that I really ought to stop dying it, but that's the
problem. I don't dye my short hair turquoise. To my misfortune, it is
quite real and natural.
Satori soon joined me in getting prepared. "You did a good job out
there in the fields, Kari-chan," she told me. "You're pretty good at
baseball."
"Upper arm strength," I joked to her, flexing a muscle. "Developed it
as a kid, and it hasn't gotten away from me."
Satori nodded. "And I saw all of the boys staring at you, Kari," she
fessed up. "They must have been impressed by you. I heard them
whispering that they'd try to ask you out."
I almost crushed the brush in my hands. "I don't want them to," I told
Satori. "I wish they'd just leave me alone, for crying out loud. They
know I don't like it when they do."
"Gee, you're so anti-feminine that it isn't funny any more," Satori
sighed. "You really should look into having a boyfriend. Maybe I could
hook you up with..."
"Stop it, Satori!" I demanded. "I don't have the time to date boys!"
She looked very frightened by the way I spat back at her. "Just don't
bring it up, okay?" I asked her.
After I calmed down, she nodded and promised. I smiled and returned to
straightening my bow. It was better than before, so I was satisfied. The
bell rang at that moment, signaling the last class of the day.
I smiled to myself. Only one more class.
I walked out with books in arms and a better spirit in my heart.
Satori and her friends grouped around me, and we pretty much enjoyed the
walk back to class. I always enjoyed my classes, for a lot of the guys
and girls there treated me only as a classmate and not a love interest.
It made me feel better about myself by the time the next class began after
gym.
Of course, they still were suspicious. "Satori, did you convince
Kariko yet?" a brown-haired classmate asked out. Instantly, she got
glares and shushes from the group. Satori only blushed and shook her head
in disappointment.
"I don't need guys, if that's what you're asking, girls," I insisted.
"Most are scum anyway. I'm sure that most only want to look up skirts and
get away with a moment like that."
"Eh, that's not true, Kariko," a black-haired girl denied. "They
aren't all like that."
I turned and pointed to the back. "Oh, yeah?"
Sure enough, the group turned to find two boys sneaking up from
behind. They instantly blushed and turned away, whistling on their merry
way, as if they meant no harm. The girls at the back went into a fit,
swiping at the boys with their schoolbags. I only smiled and walked on to
class.
After a minute, more whispers came up in the hall in our small group
after it dispersed. I managed to hear one whisper point out a
brown-haired girl in the hall that was walking with her friends. She had
her long hair up in a small ponytail, set with a blue ribbon.
"What is it, Satori?" I asked, as we sat in our seats.
"Nothing," Satori denied. "Just speaking about that odd-girl-out over
there."
"That's Shingo Asako. So?"
"So...you haven't heard the rumors?"
"Word doesn't travel well with me."
Satori shrugged. "Okay, then..."
"So you aren't going to speak?"
"I thought you wouldn't care."
"I may not act feminine," I admitted with a chuckle, "but that doesn't
mean I don't like a good rumor, once in a while. Tell me!"
Satori put a hand up to my ear. "Some people say she's...you
know...that word..." she whispered.
"What? Late?"
"No!" Satori shot back with a harsh whisper. "You know...a lesbian..."
I glared at Satori with a gasp. "You're kidding!" I whispered back.
Satori shook her head. "Mai says she saw a girl wiping lipstick from
her neck in the wash room at the end of school one day," she whispered.
"After the girl left, Asako came out of a stall and reapplied her
lipstick!"
I blinked and felt myself perspire a little. "Eww..." I sneered.
"That's..."
To my luck, the bell interrupted my train of thought as the teacher
walked in. He instantly went into a cyclone about World War II history.
I found it hard to pay attention with that rumor circling in my head. I
admitted it sounded disgusting, but a lesbian? Maybe...
I thwacked my head silently, trying to dispel the evil notion that
snuck into it. I couldn't think those thoughts or my secrets would be
divulged, especially if I was the suspicious looking one. I'd just have
to swallow my true feelings for as long as I could without choking on
them.

After helping with the cleaning chores with Satori, I walked towards my
house with her yammering about boyfriends again. I felt agitated in a
way, since she wouldn't shut up about the whole thing. I simply stood up
straight as I walked home with my bookbag in my fists.
"Then there's Nozumo," she continued. "He's awfully good at
volleyball, I've heard. He'd be perfect for..."
"That's enough, Satori!" I told her. "Stop matching me to classmates.
I'm not interested."
She sighed as I walked towards my home. "You'll be sorry that I didn't
get you interested in boys sooner, Kariko!" she yelled after me. "Don't
you want to be successful in life? Meet a mate you can live with?
Besides, who said I was matching him with..."
I felt angry at Satori for being so persistent, but I couldn't tell
her. Not until I felt safe or in college, whichever came first.
My house wasn't too far from the school itself. It was a nice
two-story one that my parents had gotten a good deal on last year. The
house was a lot like American houses with little traditional value, but it
was comfortable and inexpensive for our tastes. It had to be the whitest
house I had ever seen; not a speck of dirt on it. The shutters were red,
complimenting it well. It had a garden in the back, where my mother liked
to raise vegetables as a hobby.
I ran through the front door and removed my shoes with a grimace. They
were still tight for me. I walked in and headed straight for my room, the
worst room in the house in my opinion. Everything about it was
"feminine", forced by my mother, of course. Two dolls were piled on the
white sheets of my bed. The walls were blank, except for a fine blue and
pink design. I seriously was looking forward to living alone at college.
I really couldn't stand the style of my room anymore.
After a quick removal of my uniform, I dressed in some jeans and a blue
T-shirt. They were very American and boyish, the T-shirt with the name of
an American band, but I didn't care. That's the way I wanted to live. I
just wished my mother could understand it all.
Oh, yeah. My mom. She was nice and all, still looking young at
forty-one, despite working mostly as a housewife and a hospital volunteer
at times. She had black hair that was like a raven when she was in high
school, but age had lessened it to a softer shade. I had her hazel eyes
and facial features; a lot of people we both met said that, except for the
hair, we looked exactly like mother and daughter. That threw such a chill
into me.
Don't get me wrong. I love my mother, but she keeps trying to make me
"her little daughter". The reason my room and wardrobes were so feminine
was that my mother couldn't stand me in boys' clothes and acting so
macho. She worked so hard at home, just to make me a model of herself.
She even tried to get me to wear a dress and get me to the school dance,
but I decided I'd rather not go than have to get frilly. Is it my fault
that I'm like this? Why must she try to make me what I am not?
If anything, I liked my father a little better. He was a hard worker
and a devoted employee in the city, working as an archetect with a hidden
passion for politics. He had put some serious thought into running for a
government position, and my mother and I were behind him all the way. He
said he wasn't quite ready yet, so it'd be a few years until my father
actually constructed a campaign. He was starting to get grey in his brown
hair, but I think all would-be politicians have to have that.
I walked downstairs to find my mother back inside from gardening. She
saw my wardrobe and frowned immediately. "Kariko-chan, didn't you see the
nice vest and pants I got you last week?" she asked.
"Yeah, Mom, I did," I scowled. "They're way too pretty. I want to
wear something comfortable, not floral. Nice try with the pants and all,
but I'm comfortable with the jeans and shirt."
I turned to go outside, only to see my mother collapse into her seat
disappointingly. I faced her and shook my head. "Look," I said. "I'm
not going to let it affect my life! You know I'm not supposed to be this
way!"
"I just want us to stay here safely," she told me. "If you would only
act your gender, we could guarantee a home for ourselves."
I turned back to the door, putting on my jacket and shoes. "Well,
who's fault is that?" I asked, clicking the door behind me. I was sure
she was crying behind it, but I didn't want to check. She did that every
day.

"What do you want to do first?" Satori asked, her mouth filled with
mint chocolate chip ice cream. "We could hang at the mall. I saw a
really cool sweater at the outlet, you know."
I nodded, my own mouth full of French vanilla. "Mmm, why not?" I
agreed. "I really want to look for clothes of my own, too."
Satori knew what I was talking about. "What did she get you this
time?" she asked.
"It was closer to my style, but not enough. A floral vest, a pink
blouse, and some pants. It's still not my style."
"It's never your style," Satori giggled. "C'mon. Let's get there
before it closes."
I followed her with a smile. Yeah, she was my best friend, and she did
grow on me a lot. It was difficult for me to have a friend like her,
because of my lifestyle. Here I was, talking like a woman and walking
like a man, while she was your average school girl. It was like we fit
together like a jigsaw puzzle, but one part that stuck out was cut off; we
fit together, but barely.
She was one of my prettier friends and probably the most shy in front
of boys. She had black hair that reminded me of my mother'sãlong, but
lighter and not quite as glossy. Her eyes were always smiling by
themself, even if she wasn't, displaying a joy within its green color.
She had skin I would kill for, nary a blemish on it. In fact, she was so
neat and trim that I was surprised she wasn't with a boyfriend of some
sort. I figured that her shyness might have been the turn-off factor.
It was funny, she was the first one to truly accept me as a friend at
the school. I arrived at my first class, sporting a male uniform, and the
whole classroom froze. For a week, I was neglected, even after getting a
school uniform and trying to act more feminine. Then, one day during
lunch, she decided to bring her desk over to mine and began a conversation
with me. When she talked to me, it finally broke the barrier, and we were
friends eventually. I just couldn't tell her my secrets, or I would
probably lose her forever.
I spent the rest of the day, accompanying Satori for her shopping
spree. A pink sweater and a pair of shoes later, she and I wearily
trudged back to our neighborhood. We laughed a lot during the way home,
the way friends really should. And that's all I wanted to see her as.
Soon, Satori was back in her home, and I was heading home to mine.
Just your typical early autumn evening that felt crisp to the skin. I
reached into my pocket and brought out a pack of cigarettes I had managed
to secretly obtain from my father's room. I enjoyed feeling the warmth of
the smoke about once a week. I was no heavy smoker, but I enjoyed it when
I wanted to. It did feel a little colder than usual, the reason coming to
me in the form of a shadow under the colors of the aging trees.
"Huh?" I asked, flicking an ash aside, following it with the entire
unfinished cigarette. "Who's that?"
I looked closer to the shadows and saw the tell-tale blue ribbon and
the brown hair, along with a long skirt and blouse. There was no doubt
who it was.
"Shingo Asako," I mumbled to her greeting. I could feel my mouth hot
from the cigarette smoke. "What do you want?"
"I wanted to talk with you, Kariko," she confronted. "A revelation if
you must know."
I blinked and nodded, trying to stay warm in my T-shirt.
"I heard you and the girls acknowledging my...um...rumored sexuality,"
she told me poetically. "Do you think I'm that kind of girl?"
I felt really awkward. I mean, who was I, of tomboyish nature,
supposed to say if she was? I poked at the leaves falling and thought to
myself. "Well, I wasn't the one who started the rumor," I told her.
"Besides, I don't know you enough."
She looked to me with ice-cold blue eyes. "Would you like to know what
I'm like, Kariko?" she asked.
I felt a bead of sweat trickle down my temple. "What are you trying to
say, Asako?" I asked.
She was by my side instantly. "Don't think I don't notice you,
Kariko," she told me. "I mean, you're wearing men's clothing, you act
very macho in class, and you abhor any contact with men who have love in
their eyes. How can you judge my sexuality when you can't even judge your
own?"
I backed away. "Look, if you're suggesting that I'm the lesbian just
because I dress like a guy, you're clearly mistaken," I told her sternly.
She looked at me with more warmth this time, griping the sleeve of my
shirt and whispering in my ear. "I know that look you give Satori
sometimes, Kariko. You want to experiment with loving a woman, don't
you?"
I was shocked. "I would never do that to Satori!" I stated. "We are
only friends!"
I was even more shocked to have Asako give me a lipstick-less kiss on
the cheek. "I am not suggesting that," she said. "I am only offering my
services for you to determine who you do want to love."
I sneered at Asako. "You are a lesbian..."
She smiled and cocked an eye. "I never said that," she smiled. "I
have made out with a woman, but that doesn't mean I haven't with a man. I
believe they call it bisexuality? I'm just saying for you to think about
yourself for once. Determine your sexuality before it's too late."
She walked off into the hail of falling leaves mysteriously. I looked
back at her with a dazed complexion. Whatever she was getting at, she was
sort of right. At that moment, it was obvious that I had an identity
problem that wasn't my fault, but it didn't have to be sexual identity!
The secrets were starting to reveal themselves. By the time I realized
it, the cold chill of the evening air had frozen me.
Or was it fear?

Saturday. Only a half day of school, so less pressure, right?
Satori and I began the afterschool activities by watching a soccer game
with our friends. It was a male game, probably started with the advent of
two classmates fooling around with a ball. Of course, it had escalated
into a complete nine-on-nine match of testosterone and wits.
Satori was proudly displaying her sandals she had picked up from our
shopping trip previously. She also had on a pair of yellow shorts that
were bright as sunshine, complimented with a white shirt and jacket that
made sure to block out any sights for the boys. I myself tried to go a
little leisurely, wearing a pair of black shorts, a T-shirt, a hooded red
sweatshirt, and a white headband. The weather was certainly looking
towards winter, even though the last traces of sunlight kept it
comfortable.
"This is it," I could hear Satori saying. "I think I'll ask Nozumo out
tonight to a movie or something. He seems glad to see me daily."
I nodded unconsciously. I had seen Nozumo approaching her a lot more
recently, carrying her bag home sometimes. He must have been trying to
build up the nerve of asking her out. He was a cool-looking guy with
short brown hair, but not vain about his looks at all. He had a
girlfriend before, a short-lived relationship, but he was basically
kind-hearted to girls. I felt myself soften up and think that it was best
for Satori to get someone like that.
Then, why was I feeling jealous?
"Time out!" a voice yelled out. "Hanzo's injured!"
I woke up to see a guy limping over to the sidelines, a gash over his
knee. Probably a skid mark. One of the girls broke out the emergency
first-aid kit and took out a roll of gauze as the rest flocked around
Hanzo. It was heaven to Hanzo, I guessed, but the other seventeen players
were disappointed.
"Aw, that makes the sides uneven!" one guy yelled out. "We need
another player!"
One of the girls yelled back, "Why don't you have Kari play? She's
good at sports." Of course, that turned on the blush works from me.
"Kariko couldn't keep up with us," I heard a boy shoot out.
"Yeah, just keep her on the sidelines as a cheerleader."
The guys all laughed at that, but I was not at all happy. "Are you
saying I have no stamina to play against you?" I asked them all. "Just
because I'm a girl?"
Almost all of them agreed.
"I get it," I smiled. "None of you want to lose to a girl, right? You
boys are pretty lame to be intimidated by a woman."
This both angered the boys and inflated their egos. Soon, I was on the
front line of one team, ready to play. All it takes to get them riled up
was a simple reverse psychology.
"Why didn't you put her on defense?" I overheard behind me.
"She's got something to prove, that's why," our line captain told the
rest. "I sincerely doubt she'll do well, but you never know."
What the captain said made me feels better. At least someone didn't
mind I was playing.
"Besides, that's Hanzo's position, and I didn't feel like moving
everyone around."
I narrowed my eyes and growled to myself. "I'll pretend I didn't hear
that," I mumbled out.
The game after that went relatively slow. No action for both sides,
but mostly me. Whenever they sent the ball up, it was always on the left
side of the field. When I tried to go to the left side to help out, I was
constantly told to play my position. It was like I was just a substitute
trying to get water for the team.
The day was starting to turn sour and late, meaning something would
have to give. There was surprisingly no score, as both goalies were from
the school's team. I hear the captains shouting that the game would end
by the next goal. If I wanted to be effective as a player, I'd have to
make my play now.
We were attacking the opposition's net ferociously this time. A few
shots had careened to the side, with one even hitting the crossbar like a
rocket. Nozumo had punted the ball desperately towards the goal, simply
to keep it in the area. I noticed the timing was perfect. The ball shot
by the defender, just as I passed him. No offsides, and a one-on-one
situation.
"Go, Kari!" I heard Satori and Nozumo crying out. I ran like lightning
and swung my foot at the ball, my eyes closed for some bizarre reason.
Probably because I didn't want to be known as the one who missed a perfect
opportunity for an early exit.
After the contact, I cracked an eye open. The goalie was stretched on
the ground, huffing hoarsely. Beyond his grasp, the net was fluttering
with two breezes, one of autumn and one of my winning goal.
I leaped up in excitement. The game was finally over. I looked around
after I exhaled in satisfaction, thinking the game was over, but the
players weren't at all showing it. Some were giving glares to both Nozumo
and the goalie, as if they were angry at them for the embarrassing
situation. Others were congratulating our goalie for a good job done.
But no one was congratulating me, the one who had won it.
I sulked at the goalposts, feeling absolutely shot down emotionally.
Satori walked up to me, along with Nozumo. "Are you going to be okay,
Kari-chan?" she asked. "Yeesh. What egos those guys have."
She glared a little at Nozumo. "What?" he asked us. "I was all for
Kariko playing. Don't pin the blame on me here."
"It's okay," I said slightly disappointed and slumping to the ground,
getting mud on my knees. "Let them be like that."
"Kari-chan, are you crying?"
I looked at Satori with cloudy eyes. Yes, I was crying. I didn't want
to, after all the hard work I had put into getting that one goal. I
couldn't let Satori see me like this anymore. Without saying another
word, I grabbed my duffel bag and immediately ran for home. It was the
most humiliating event of my life.
I skidded to a halt, a block from home. Once again, the shadowy figure
startled me and stopped me.
"I see your situation is already changing drastically," Asako chuckled
to me. She was dressed in a pair of nice slacks and an admirable red
jacket. "I could see it in your eyes."
I couldn't respond to her calmly. "Will you keep your nose out of my
business, Asako?!" I shouted. "My love life is my business, not yours!
Satori means nothing to me, only as a friend!"
Asako flashed a confident grin. "Quit kidding to yourself, Kariko. No
one can be asexual. You played that game like you were one of the boys.
Their ignorance is their way of saying they see nothing in you. When I
see you and Satori together, I can notice the mutual attraction to one
another."
"I'm too young for all of this! Stop it! You want a reason for all
this?!"
Asako looked to me as if she wanted to hear this.
"I DON'T LIKE GUYS!! I just flat out don't like guys!! They are so
attention-grabbing and egocentric!"
Asako cocked an eye. "Oh? Like you?"
I stopped myself with wide eyes. Did she know?
She came to my side, in passing, and whispered to me. "I know what you
are feeling. Let me help some time for you." She continued on, unfazed
by the whisper, but changed somewhat to my vision of her.
She couldn't have known.
"Hey, Kariko!"
I turned to see Nozumo huffing behind me. "Hold on! You didn't have
to steam off like that!"
I turned the proverbial cold shoulder to him. "What do you want?" I asked.
"You never gave me a chance to say," he wheezed. After collecting his
composure, he straightened up. "I just wanted to say that I was glad you
got that goal. I passed it to you, knowing you were open."
"You...knew I'd score?"
"Sure! I had total faith in you. You always leave the other girls in
the dust at gym class, so I figured you would be strong enough to fire it
past a goalie."
I looked at him curiously. "You mean you weren't watching Satori
during gym class?" I blurted out. "You were watching me?"
"Well, yes. You and Satori."
"I thought you liked Satori. You spend a lot of time with her walking
home."
"Well, she's okay, but she doesn't deserve me. She deserves the first
person to come around and sweep her off her feet. I only walk home with
her, because we live next door to each other."
I looked at him blankly.
"What I'm trying to say," he said in a blush and a simple step or two,
"is that I like you better. That was the basic reason I fired that shot
to you. I'd like to know if you could go see a movie with me tonight."
"A....date?"
I heard a rustle of leaves stop behind Nozumo. He and I both looked
back to see Satori in a dazed look. She was on the verge of either crying
or screaming, whichever emotion got to her first. She finally broke the
barrier with a tear.
"I...understand now," she wept.
I looked to Satori. "Satori...I haven't said yes yet..."
The tears came more vigorously now, as she ran home in total
obliteration. "Wait, Satori!" I yelled after her. I wanted to chase
after her to apologize, but even I wasn't that fast. Besides, I had more
important things to do, like wind my right fist up and slug Nozumo hard in
the stomach. He was caught quite off-guard and exhaled in pain.
"You insensitive jerk!" I yelled at him. "Are you that stupid?!
Couldn't you see that Satori cared for you more than I do? I can't
believe how immature some of you guys can be!"
I grabbed my duffel bag and ran after Satori as fast as I could,
leaving Nozumo gasping for air. Yeah, I probably could have stopped
myself from running and could have returned to Nozumo to apologize, but
Satori was hurt a lot more. After a few minutes of running, I managed to
catch seeing Satori running into her home.
I dropped my duffel bag and tried to catch my breath, knowing she
wouldn't want to even say a word to me. However, instead of going
straight to the door and apologizing, I simply picked up my bag again and
started to walk home. I had spent all my tears earlier, so I really
didn't feel like crying. I just hoped that one day would be all the time
I needed to apologize to Satori. She and I both needed time alone.

End Part One

All concepts of Ranma 1/2 and the small cameo role are property of
Rumiko Takahashi and the like. All other characters are copywritten and
property of myself.
As a slight warning, this story is an explicit story. This story does
contain some violent nature, as well as adult situations. While it is not
an actual *lemon* series, there are some sexual references and situation.
Consider your audience before showing it to them.
In other words, it's probably Rated åR'...

____________________________
My So-Called Half-Life
A Biography In Pieces
Fanfiction by Geoff Tebbetts
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Part Two

When I came through the front door, I walked straight towards my
room. The path between the front door and my room seemed to burn a line
each time I walked in. I had walked it so much lately, avoiding my
parents as much as possible, that I could see it clearly. Speaking of my
parents, I could see my mother cleaning up after dinner.
I walked in and bowed to her, but continued to my room. "I'm not
hungry tonight," I choked out. I began up the steps, but paused halfway
when I could hear my mother walking behind me.
"Sorry I was late," I told her apologetically. "I've been playing
soccer for the last half hour and it went a little late."
She didn't seem to be worried about that. "You've been crying," she told
me.
I blinked and looked back to my mother. "My eyes are that red?" I
asked. "Yeah, I've been crying."
"Would you like to talk about it?" she asked. For the first time in a
while, my mother actually wished to comfort me. I was so depressed that
moment that all I could do was accept. I cowardly wept in her arms for a
good minute.
"It's so unfair!" I cried. "Why did it have to be so unfair? I hate
myself like this!"
My mother stroked my hair as I wept. There I was, being treated like a
girl in her mother's arms, crying tears of pity. Now that I look back at
it, I abhor the treatment I received then, but I didn't seem to care at
that moment. I just wanted to be loved for a few minutes.
"What is your trouble, dear?"
"An identity crisis, you might say," I sniffed.
"Something to do with Satori?"
She was asking all the right questions from a mother's point of view.
"It's a long story, but she's confided to me that she likes her friend
Nozumo. After the soccer game, Nozumo asked me on a date, and Satori
heard all of this before I could say no. I feel I've lost her forever."
I could feel my mother's forehead wrinkle when I said this. "I'm being
ignored and hated by everyone," I mumbled. "I just want my old life
back. Then I wouldn't have to worry about my mixed-up feelings."
"Don't you think it's time you tried to act your gender?"
I looked at my mother, wanting to yell at her for bringing the subject
up. Instead, this time, I looked to her to listen.
"You can't go back to the life you used to live, Kariko, dear," she
told me. "You care for Satori too much. It sounds like Nozumo has made
his choice, and you must either accept him or not. Whatever your choice
is, don't try to fall for Satori unless you want her to know."
"This is why you want me to act feminine, right?"
"To prevent these situations, yes."
I sighed in her arms. It disgusted me so to picture myself going on a
date with a boy, let alone get romantically or even sexually involved with
one. I didn't want to spend my whole life trapped in a life I didn't
want.
"How about a week?"
I looked at my mother. "What are you saying?"
"Try acting like a girl for a week. Just for me, for a change."
"But, Mom..."
She looked at me with heavy eyes. "Do you want the secret kept or not?"
"I thought I was fine going this way."
"If you treat Satori as only a friend, she'll forgive you. If you
treat her as a love interest, it'll only scare her off, right?"
I looked down. I guessed that a week of femininity wouldn't hurt too
much. I just would have to spend a week closely guarding my secrets. A
week using words to turn down boys, not fists in the stomach. A week
wearing outfits that I would normally try to stuff in laundry hampers.
"Okay," I said, wiping my eyes, "but if it's too much, I back out."
My mother smiled. "That's my little...girl."
I shook my head in my mother's arms. I'd never get used to that phrase.

Monday came faster than I had accounted for. All day Sunday, my mother
trained me in every act of grace and femininity, from walking upright in
heels to applying make-up to being polite in public. I was in pain on
Monday morning, as if I had gone through a three-day workout, but the
differences were only beginning to be tested, especially in front of the
rest of my class.
I first saw Satori walking to class by herself. Her once-merry eyes
were red from crying when she looked at me. To my heartbreak, she turned
away coldly, but I couldn't take this as an answer. I walked up to her
quickly.
"Satori, I know you are angry at me, but please don't walk away like
that," I told her.
She whirled quickly, her long black hair appearing like a whip at me.
"Why should I listen to you?" she shot back. "You stole Nozumo from me.
I wanted to ask him first."
I grabbed her arm quickly, but not hard. "Satori, I didn't ask him!" I
said alertly. "He asked me! And if you want to know, I turned him down
flatly! Why don't you believe me?"
"Shut up!"
She wound up and slapped me hard in the face, enough to stun me, but
not enough to floor me. I just stood there with a defeated look in my
eyes that probably doused the fire she had in hers. She turned around and
held her hand, while I rubbed my cheek.
"Satori, I know you like him a lot," I told her. "If I tried to steal
him from you, I wouldn't be much of a friend anymore. The last thing I
want to do is lose someone who's always been by my side."
Satori turned to look at me, her eyes wavering. "You're right, Kari,"
she sighed. "I guess it was all that anger at Nozumo. You think a guy
likes you, and you'll believe anything. I wasn't in the mood for an
explanation. It just hurt."
"Not as much as it hurt Nozumo," I told her, straightening up and
wincing a little.
"You mean he does care for me?"
"No. I mean I slugged him hard in the breadbasket after you left."
Satori smiled for a second and then burst out laughing. "Serves him
right," she giggled. "Do you forgive me? I acted like such a bitch."
"That's okay," I told her. "These things happen."
We conversed all the way to our classroom. At least I felt better, and
I'm sure she was, as well. We stopped in the women's room before class
started to clean ourselves up one last time. I adjusted my bow neatly and
received odd looks from Satori.
"Kari-chan, you look...different today."
I nodded and pointed to my face. "Must be a little of it showing," I
smirked. "Mom and I experimented this weekend with some makeup. I'm
wearing a little blush right now."
Satori just looked at me with a wide open mouth. Even she couldn't
believe what I had done. "You? Wearing makeup?" she asked. "When did
this happen? And why?"
I sighed, as I looked at myself in the mirror. "I guess...I guess I've
accepted who I really am," I told her. "My lifestyle's forcing me to go
in this path. If I stay macho and tomboyish, it'll only encourage the
guys to try to go out with me. It'll make me look normal enough."
Satori smiled. "Well, it makes you look a lot better," she said to
me. "Not anything like the macho tomboy you used to be."
I playfully slapped at Satori with a notebook. "And what was wrong
with that?" I asked. "Better than cramming a double fudge brownie during
lunchtime on Friday!"
"You saw that?"
"Uh-huh. Weren't you on a diet?"
I got about ten smacks from Satori's notebook for that one. "Okay!
Okay! It was a joke, okay?"
Satori smirked and walked with me to class. I was certainly glad she
was friendly again; that was the longest weekend I had ever been through.
It was unfortunate that I hadn't got all of my make-up off, though. When
Satori and I arrived in class, it was like all the boys could notice even
the slightest amount of blush.
I could hear the whispers.
"Is that a new girl?"
"She looks much different today."
"Do you think someone dated her, or something?"
I gave everyone glares that could kill, but did nothing. At first,
everyone expected more, but when I didn't respond, they were puzzled. It
wasn't like me to pacify myself like that, but I made a promise to act my
gender, and I wasn't going to back down yet. I had a feeling I wouldn't
like the day's events.

Lunchtime again. School goes fast when your stomach craves food. By
the time the last class finished, everyone had a rumble in their stomach,
making the room sound like a stampede of bulls. Soon, all of the desks
had turned into their traditional private rectangles, and each friend
would eat with his or her own.
I opened my bentou with a sigh. Pink. The stupid box was pink. I
mean, my mother was going a bit far with this promise I gave her. I
grumbled, but at least the meal looked appeasing. Rice with red plum and
those green snap-peas. Really good with yakisoba pan and juice. I was
especially hungry that day, so even the pink plastic chopsticks with the
little characters weren't that big a pain.
"This isn't like you, Kari," I heard a girl say to me. "I saw you
shopping with your mother this weekend."
I blushed. "Yeah, it's a promise I had to make with my mother. She
thinks it's time I start becoming more feminine. No fights, no male
clothes. I don't want to, but she says it's about time."
The table was stunned, except for Satori, who already knew. The
reaction was mixed, probably due to males hiding their expressions of joy
and women hiding their expressions of jealousy.
"Don't get the wrong idea," I told them. "I'm still not dating guys,
and I won't be for a while." The guys seemed a little disturbed at this.
At least the women relaxed, knowing I wouldn't try to grab extra attention
with my "femininity experiment".
"Oh, yeah. And I'm sorry I slugged you, Nozumo."
Nozumo himself wasn't in that happy of a mood himself. "Geez, I just
tried asking," he mumbled. "You didn't have to hit me while I was off my
guard."
"Well, if you hadn't been Mr. Insensitive, this never would have
happened," I told him. "Try not to think with your testosterone next
time."
Nozumo stood up and growled. "How was I supposed to know Satori liked
me?" he shot back. "Am I supposed to have some indicator that flashes
when a girl thinks she likes me?"
I saw Satori blush hotly. I looked back to Nozumo and quickly grabbed
his shirt. "Why don't you announce it to the whole school, you idiot?" I
asked fiercely. "Why, I ought to..."
I frowned and released him, sitting back in my seat. "...ignore that,"
I continued in a mumble. This immediately got the table whispering
around. I sighed and finished my last drop of juice as Nozumo blinked in
a stunned fashion and simply left for the men's room.
"Why didn't you hit the creep?" Satori asked me. "How dare he, saying
to the whole class that I liked him!"
"I couldn't, Satori," I responded. "I wanted to. I really wanted to,
but a promise is a promise. If I was caught fighting against Nozumo, I'd
be going against my mother's words, as much as I hate them."
"Tolerance, huh?" Satori wondered. "Well, you're going to have to
sooner or later, I guess."
I sulked to myself. "I don't want to."
"Oh, it's not shameful to be feminine. It's something that can't be
avoided in us. Sometimes it can be fun." Satori leaned in and whispered
something to me.
"Like when it comes to shopping..."
I looked back at her with a worried expression. "Uh-uh. No way.
That's the last thing I want to see myself doing..."

My pulse had heightened to the point of having an aneurysm blow up my
arteries. I felt sickened, queasy enough to vomit up my lunch. My head
was spinning, but I managed to stabilize myself enough to inhale deeply
and try to separate myself from the world. I could hear my mother and
Satori conversing amongst the cotton.
"Oh, Kariko," my mom said to me. "These are just your size. They'll
fit perfectly." I opened my eyes enough to see my mother standing in
front of me, unveiling a pair of purple panties in her hands.
"Mom!" I whispered. "Can you say that any louder? Don't embarrass me!"
"Live a little, Kariko!" Satori called over to me, feeling the fabric
of a bra. "We're in a lingerie shop. There's nothing to be embarrassed
about. No one will know."
I nodded and felt myself give up. I felt embarrassed beyond words and
even a little guilty, but at least Satori was having fun. Maybe just
once, I felt myself letting the naughty thoughts in. It was just clothes,
right? I wasn't hurting anyone doing this. I still had my pride.
My mother handed me a small bundle of lingerie, all of them bras and
panties. I smiled timidly to myself and nodded. "I'll try them on," I
sighed, "but I will not guarantee I'll buy them."
"Oh, Kariko, wait up," Satori chimed. "I'll try some on with you."
I struggled to resist blushing. "No, it's okay, Satori. I'll try
these on myself."
Satori simply grabbed my arm and dragged me and my bundle off to the
booths. "Stop being so modest, Kariko," she goaded. "You need someone to
judge how they look on you. Knowing you, you'll probably feign putting
them on and come out not wanting any."
I sighed. She hit it right on the nose. We disappeared into the booth
for a good half-hour. However, I just sat by my bundle and watched Satori
put on her lingerie. I looked away a lot, afraid of the small items that
Satori was putting on. Luckily, I was doing a good job keeping all
tension inside and was only cautionary to the revealing stands of cotton
and silk in the room. My mom was probably worried about the price, but I
was trying to convince myself that it wouldn't be necessary to buy them.
"Kariko, try some on."
I shook my head. "They aren't my style," I told her. "Why can't I
just stick with my old one?"
Satori stood me up and shoved me in front of the mirror, showing me how
I looked in mine. "Kariko, no one likes to see a woman in an old bra,"
she commented. "I've seen yours in gym, and believe me, you need a
lingerie facelift. Here, try this one on."
She unsnapped my bra behind me and quickly replaced it with a bluish
one. The fabric felt cold, but the shiver was gone in less than a
second. I cracked open an eye to see me in it and would have felt
sickened a week ago. But I could hear the promise I gave my mother
ringing in my ears. I had to act inconspicuously.
"It's...nice, Satori," I grinned sheepishly. "Blue's...my color."

Day 7 had finally come and gone.
I barely noticed the week was over. I could notice the changes in my
appearance had been changing my attitude, and I was enjoying it. I had
been spending more time smiling in school, a surprise to everyone. My
grades were getting better, now that I was able to think clearly and not
be bothered by others about my tomboyish actions. I had almost quit
smoking completely. Not to mention, my friendship with Satori had been
cemented into place. I still felt wary around boys, but not as much as
before. My mother's promise had worked, but perhaps a little too well?
It had been raining that Saturday as a torrential downpour. After
school, Satori and I had gone straight to the mall area with a bunch of
friends to avoid the rain. When we all got there, we were soaked to the
bone, but laughing hysterically. It was your basic fall rain that wasn't
cold enough to cause pneumonia, warm enough to run without an umbrella.
We all made it to the shops with lost breath and warm sensations all
over. It was like we all were kids again, the days where gender problems
were only seen in the ways we acted. The days would be filled with sugar,
mudpies, scraped knees, and loud voices. Junior high brought the advent
of puberty, dates, and crushes. High school went off the deep end, as
raging hormones and private emotions swept innocence away. I sighed to
myself and wished we had hit some kind of time reversal.
The rest of the day, we did just that. For three hours, Satori, three
of our friends, and I shopped. Shopped for odd stuff for me. Dresses,
shoes, the like. I had never enjoyed sitting in a mall for an hour, let
alone there buying girls' clothes, but it strangely did not really occur
to me that I was supposed to be bored of this activity. The week had
changed me almost entirely, and I hadn't noticed. If I had consciously
noticed, I would have chained myself up for life.
I ended the day a good deal lighter in money and a skirt and pair of
shoes heavier. Satori had bought an interesting brown hat, one of those
French berets with a little bit of modification. The other three I really
paid no attention. They left before I could see. However, Satori and I
headed home together, joking to each other on the way.
"Kariko, you've really changed over this week!" Satori told me. "I
didn't even have to help you pick out stuff to buy!"
I grinned a fickle smile. "Well, I guess I'm getting more comfortable
with myself," I told her. "I really hadn't noticed..."
"Gee, you bought a skirt all by yourself," Satori began to list, "you
got dressed after gym class without looking awkward, you actually
conversed with everyone in the shower room...all we have to do is get you
a date."
I nudged Satori. "Oh, shush. I don't need them now..."
I turned a little, walking carefully. I swore that I heard a twig snap
behind us. The sky still had remainders of clouds, making the afternoon
slightly darker than normal. It just occurred to the both of us that the
scenery seemed a little scarier with the approach of winter in the air.
Satori gripped my hand and inched closer, noticeably afraid of something.
I was, too, getting a feeling of icebergs flowing through my arteries.
Our encounter started with some punkish pretty-boy stepping in our
path. He had on shades, obscuring his eyes from us. A singular earring
draped from his right ear, ending in a small onyx stone. His hair was
punkish, blonde with attempts of purple dying evident. I immediately
disapproved of this man's grisly appearance in a brown jacket and ripped
jeans, so I lead Satori in the opposite direction, only to encounter two
similar-looking men of varying height and weight.
"Hey, ladies," the shaded man addressed in a vain voice. "Care to give
the time of day?"
Satori glanced at her watch. "4 o'clock," she told them. "We're late
for something. We have to go."
The shaded man grabbed her wrist as she held it up. "But we're not.
We have time to burn. Wanna party with us?"
She shook her head and tried to wrench her wrist back. "Let go of me!"
she fired back. I appeared much more scared than she was, but I managed
to muster up enough courage to push the shaded man back. Hard. He let go
of Satori as he reeled back.
I reached for Satori's arm and tried to run with her, but I found each
of my arms grabbed from behind by the two brutes the man had with him.
Satori was afraid of what might happen, but I shook my head at her. "Go
get help!" I screamed to her. Satori backed away fearfully and ran as
fast as she could, too many steps in front of the man for him to catch
her.
"Eh, let her go," the shaded man said to his partners, rubbing his
chin. "She's no concern of ours. I have a feeling that this bitch isn't
going anywhere."
To my horror, the man grabbed the top of my sailor fuku and tore it
down the middle with the sickening sound of fabric ripping. My brain
reeled from the seriousness of this whole thing, and I wanted to let out a
scream. My lungs seized up as the man pounded me in the stomach with his
fist. I coughed in extreme pain, unable to scream at all.
I tried bending over to alleviate the pain, but the man forced me to
stand straight. His gloved hands began groping my chest rudely, and I
tried to wriggle my way away. I ended up doing the wrong thing, kicking
at him as I twitched. Not only did that aggravate my injury, it
aggravated the man. He proceeded to smack me hard in the face, sending me
reeling out of his goons' hands and face down into a large puddle.
I was too hurt to even get up as I peered at them. One of my eyes was
closed from a cut above it, the blood trickling down over my left eye.
The water stung the cut on my stomach and the scrapes that had formed on
my knees by the fall. I felt the energy in my legs disappear, turned to
jelly by the thought of what the men could do to me. I collapsed in the
puddle, riddled with fear and irony...

Part Two

"Augh!"
I screamed with all my might as I came into consciousness. My heart
was trying to jump out of my throat from the anxiety and fright. My wide
eyes were blinded by the light of a room that wasn't mine. I could feel
light covers from a comfortable bed clinging to my skin. At first, I was
scared that the man had dragged me to his home, but I knew he would never
admit to having silk covers on his bed.
I looked around, trying to see where I was. I could see the reminder
of the attack; the sight of my ripped uniform draped on a chair brought
out a whimpering sigh from me. My cheek was a little swollen from the
bruise, but someone had bandaged the cut over my left eye. I figured this
was the same person who had rescued me.
I leaned up from my position into a seated one on the bed, still
half-covered by the sheets. I was only in my underwear, probably due to
the fact that my clothes were probably muddy and soaked. My hair had
dried together from the dirt and water, making it clump together. I
really needed a shower badly, just to clean myself up and to calm myself
down. My legs were shaky as I got up from the bed and made my way to a
shower. I was sure that whoever brought me there wouldn't mind.
I got into the shower, stripped naked for cleaning myself. I paused as
I inspected my body closer, especially my sexual areas. I saw no
mistreatment below the belt, but looks were all I could go on. The
thought that I could have been...violated scared me to death. I crumbled
into the shower and turned on the water, an environment I never really
liked.
The shower, tiled in blue, was a grateful sight. I stepped inside,
chilled at first by the sensation of cold water droplets scraping against
my bare feet. I grabbed the dial of the shower, getting my body doused
with cold water. I pulled at the dial, anxious to feel hot water stinging
at my skin like acupuncture needles, wanting to relax and become what I
really was...
As I got halfway there, I heard someone come into the room. I quickly
twisted the dial back, grabbed a towel, and disappeared behind it, scared
for a moment. I peeked out of the shower to see the back of a long-haired
brunette laying out clothes for me. I was hard to see right away from the
angle, but I soon managed to catch a glimpse of the face.
"Is the shower okay?" she asked, turning to me. She still had her
uniform on from the school day, her hair unchanged. She seemed a little
friendlier than the snobby look she seemed to exhibit at school.
"A...sa...ko? This is your...?"
Asako nodded, placing a white nightshirt on a rack. "Yes, it's my
parents' place," she told me. "They're...separated, so I usually spend my
time alone here. I hope you don't mind that I brought you here."
"You mean you chased those men away?" I asked, stepping out with my
towel wrapped around me. "Did they...?"
She shook her head. "If you are wondering if they raped you, they did
not," she spoke to me. "I saw them just as the one in the shades hit
you. If I wasn't there, they might have killed you..."
I looked down and nodded. "You saved my life," I admitted. "I don't
know what to say or do. But why?"
"Would you wish to see someone you knew get raped? You'd really feel
awful to let that happen right in front of your eyes. So I just made a
commotion and they ran."
I sighed as I slipped on my temporary night wear. "I'm sorry I treated
you that way before, Asako," I told her. "The others looked at you
negatively, so I did, as well. I just didn't want to admit to you
anything..."
I was cut off as Asako lifted my chin upwards to look at me. "You can
admit anything to me, Kariko," she smiled. "Tell me honestly, do you have
feelings for Satori?"
I blushed hotly and tried to shake my head vigorously, but found it
hard to. I felt as if I was an antique doll with her neck frozen still
from the pin. "It's not right for me to, Asako," I told her, "but there's
a part of me that you'd never understand, a part that wishes to be loved
by somebody, even if it must be Satori. Maybe not sexually, maybe not
embracingly, but some way to tell her that I care for her."
Asako looked at me, as if trying to pry into the mirrors of my eyes.
She neared her lips to mine slowly, whispering, "Do you want me to?"
I was so shocked that I wished I could pause the moment and think it
through. I could feel myself trying to make the decision that felt moral,
yet my mouth could only choke out an inaudible yes. That was just before
my dry mouth was connected to hers. It felt like the hot and cold fronts
of a weather system merging to form a tornado, except lacking the power
and torrent that made it feared. Only a dwindling whirlpool...

I sat down on Asako's bed, the one I had been sleeping in before. I
was a little scared at first to what I was about to do. Asako was seated
next to me, smiling tenderly. I felt something between us, unsure of
exactly what. I bit my lip in uncertainty; she looked like she wanted to
calm me down through sexuality.
Asako sat next to me in her school uniform. I was able to notice her
features a little bit more distinctly. Her brown hair was slightly longer
than mine, long enough for a crude ponytail in her hair. Her eyes were
green gems that shone with a particular trickery that you only see in
kittens and little children. Her uniform was just like mine, except
seeming a little less care in her dressing. As for myself, I only had the
nightshirt on with the undergarments underneath.
Just remember that it doesn't matter what I am on the outside, I kept
telling myself. It's what I am on the inside. I mean, if it happens,
it's okay, right? She saved my life. I owe her this much...
I found myself losing thoughts as she and I met again for a kiss. It
wasn't forced, the way I first perceived Asako to be. She was quite
gentle in treating me, a side I had never seen in her before. It was
enough to want to show her the side of me she or any of my closest friends
had never seen before. I was on the verge, but I hesistated.
Asako caressed the side of my cheek with the back of her hand and
looked into my eyes. She passed her index finger over my lips to both
hush and calm me. I felt scared that she might treat me the way the men
did...
I looked down, whispering, "I don't know what to do, Asako. It's like
no one will accept me. I have these needs, now that I approach the end of
adolescence, that are more than social. Now that this has happened..."
Asako spoke into my ear in a soothing manner that would be termed as
"sweet nothings" volume. "Kariko, let me calm you down tonight," she told
me in a whisper. "You need someone in your arms tonight, someone to tend
for your needs. Just say the word."
I looked at Asako and hugged her. I felt my promise to my mother
fading away with the embrace. "Please, Asako," I told her. "I want to
forget that this ever happened. I never want to be feminine. I never
want to love a man...ever. Show me how right I am."
Asako helped me out of my night shirt as I considered my choice. What
the heck did I just say? I had yet to reach 18 and I was deciding on
sex! What was I doing? Of course, that was what I was screaming on the
inside. I didn't hear it on the outside, as Asako slid her skirt off and
folded it neatly to the side.
Soon, to my sudden flash of not paying attention, there we were, both
half naked and lying down on the bed. I had never been in such a
position, and it froze me so. Asako was cuddling with me, a successful
foreplay in her standards, but not for me. I was almost stiff, making
absolutely no motion as she stroked me. I felt her reach between my legs
in a slow, unnoticable move and touch me there, sending me in two
directions. Even though it did arouse me, I still felt scared.
She had the front of her sailor fuku unzipped open, showing her bra.
She had it unhooked slowly, showing me her developed bosom. Once again, I
felt like it was the situation in the showers, embarrassed to be in the
same room with another female. The uncertainty only increased, as Asako
took my hand and placed it on her breasts, letting the palm brush over
it. As I was stunned, my tomboyish nature broke out of its week-long
hibernation. I found my hand moving on its own over her skin.
But, still, it felt wrong inside...
Asako had begun to caress my shoulders and probably trying to seek the
snap on my undergarment.
I was too young and confused for this...
My hunch was right as Asako began to reach for the hook.
I was feeling the same way as the previous situation!
I quickly darted away, saying strictly to her, "No!"
For the next ten seconds, we stared at each other. I looked at her,
hiding my chest and almost hurt that she was doing this to me. Asako,
holding my bra in her hand, looked in a quiet and calculated manner at me,
my body, and my emotions. I looked down and stepped away, trying to keep
myself together.
"I do not wish to do this, Asako," I stated, clenching my arms to my
chest. "I feel so close to wanting to, but I can't. I know it's what you
want. but I just can't go through with it. Not after what has happened
today..."
Asako nodded and handed me my clothes properly. "If it hurts you that
badly," she acknowledged. "It is a bit wrong of me, isn't it? You are
welcome to sleep here tonight. I shall call your parents to let them know
you're here. Should I call the police, as well?"
I looked down, awash in thought. I had to do it, I kept reminding
myself. If I don't do tell someone at some time, the same exact thing
could happen again. I'd be unhappy, lonely, and possibly driven to
insanity. I had finally made up my mind, hearing my mother's promise
fade.
"No, Asako. There will be no need anymore," I told her, wiping my
eyes. "This won't happen again."
She nodded and walked out of the room. "You are the most human person
I have ever seen, Kariko-chan," she instructed. "Get some sleep for now.
The day could not get any rougher for you."
With that, she left, leaving me to wallow in the hole I had dug for
myself. "I'm sorry, Mother," I whispered to nobody in particular.

End Part Two

All concepts of Ranma 1/2 and the small cameo role are property of
Rumiko Takahashi and the like. All other characters are copywritten and
property of myself.
As a slight warning, this story is an explicit story. This story does
contain some violent nature, as well as adult situations. While it is not
an actual *lemon* series, there are some sexual references and situation.
Consider your audience before showing it to them.
In other words, it's probably Rated åR'...

____________________________
My So-Called Half-Life
A Biography In Pieces
Fanfiction by Geoff Tebbetts
____________________________

Part Three

I saw the school dead ahead...er...straight ahead. Never want to use
ådead' in a sentence ever again. The wind was a bit chilly today; I
probably would have frozen my legs off in the weather.
My sailor suit was ruined completely. I made some hard-to-stomach
excuse to my mother, telling her some lame story that a dog had ripped
them after I had dropped them coming home. The reason I was over
Asako's? I couldn't come up with a good excuse, but I tried to tell them
that the dog hurt me, as well. I was absolutely shocked that they bought
it.
I stood there, facing the school like my first day there, scared to
go. I could feel the wind bring me back to that day I arrived at the high
school. It was the exact beginning of the school year, arriving as if I
was a year late to school. The weather was mixed with drizzle, a forecast
that even the meteorologist couldn't have guessed. My first steps on the
courtyard were quite easy for myself, but not so for the others around
me. All I could hear were whispers and hushes of either criticism or
blatant segregation.
It all stopped when I was forced to stop looking at the ground before
me and to look up in the rain to the principal I had been approached by.
He had a face weathered with erosion of 40 years of teaching, I had
guessed. His hair was gray, almost as harsh as steel wool on an orange.
The glasses were mirrored back at me, showing my indifferent face back at
me. I saw no care in those eyes, just the authoritative figurehead of the
school.
"Excuse me, miss," he said to me, "but you cannot go into this high
school like that."
"This was all my parents had for me to dress in, sir," I responded.
"You have no school uniform?"
"No, I do not, sir."
"I find that quite hard to believe."
I remained calm. "You may call my parents if you must, sir," I told
him. "I assure you this is all I have."
The man did not waver either. "Fine. Then you shall not stand in the
female section during introduction..."
I didn't know whether to exhale in disappointment or in relief.
"...or the male section. You will stand between them in your own
section. By yourself."
I was shocked. "Sir!" I exclaimed, pleading with him with emotion.
"Please, I am telling the truth! Why should I be punished for it?"
"Stand between them!"
I glared at him and sighed inaudibly, silent enough not to get in any
more trouble. As the bell chimed, the students fell into two major
blocks: the right block being composed of men and the other composed of
women. I got stares and whispers as I walked through both of the ranks
and stood timidly in the middle. Some students even began to laugh a
little as I stood there, bookbag held with both hands.
The principal had greeted us all with traditional announcements for the
beginning of the school year, then veering off into a non-traditional
statement. "It has been told to me," the spectacled gray-haired man
began, "that one of the students, a new one as that, has failed to follow
school regulations. Male students must wear the uniforms given to them,
as should the female students. There are no exceptions, especially with
the subject of uniforms; a student may not wear the uniform of the
opposite gender!"
This got all of the attention of the students, who began to laugh
loudly at me. Amidst the hilarity, the principal spoke out, "Those who do
not follow the rules shall stand in their own section and face
suspension. Since this is a new student, this shall be a fair warning."
I closed my eyes, still at attention. I really wanted to cry for the
first time in years...
I walked confidently into the schoolyard, getting stares again. As if
by schedule, the old man faced me again. "Matsumoto-san!" he bellowed.
"Did we not warn you that this is grounds for suspension?!"
"Sir, my uniform was ruined the other day by...a dog," I spoke out.
"This was all I had."
"The excuse didn't work before, Matsumoto-san," he frowned. "Go stand
in the middle..."
"Excuse me, sir?"
I looked behind and saw Satori standing behind the man, crouched in
full bow. "Matsumoto-san is correct," she spoke. "Her uniform was
ruined. Allow me to help her out." In her hands, as she straightened up,
was a pile of new clothes, a complete uniform for me to wear.
The principal was frowning, but satisfied. "Fine. Matsumoto-san, you
have gotten another break. But don't let me see you do this again, or I
will have to seek some sort of suspension! The rules are the rules."
He walked away, a defeated enemy for the meantime. I exhaled as Satori
plopped the pile in my arms. "I had an extra one at home," she smiled.
"Thought you might need it."
I brightened up a little. "Thank you, Satori!" I cried. "You're
really a sight for sore eyes."
"Hey, what are friends for?" she grinned. "Now, put them on before
they call attendance!"
"Did you call the police about those jerks?" I asked her.
She seemed hesitant at first in answering. "Oh. Of course I did.
Everything's taken care of. Don't wory about it."
I nodded and hurried into the women's room, my heart brimming with
confidence and joy for the absolute first time in my short school career.
I was a bit cautious from her response; I hoped that she wasn't trying to
hide something.

I felt good that day, as I was showering after gym class. So much, in
fact, that I never noticed my class entering as I took my customary early
shower. I didn't notice until they had come in, but I really didn't care
at the monent, nor did I feel embarrassed. It was all literally water off
my back.
"Kariko! You're actually taking a shower with us?" I heard one say.
I turned, nodding. "I need a change of pace, you know. I'm feeling
good about myself, for once."
"You sly devil!" Satori told me. "You are growing up!" She nudged me
in the ribs, forcing a chuckle out of me.
Although I was feeling good, I heard commotion outside of the shower
room. I remembered that there was a little bit of rough-housing during
volleyball. My schoolmates Harumi and Chisako were on opposite teams,
developing a rivalry after Harumi spiked the ball into Chisako's face.
The argument developed into a tangle in the shower room.
"You deliberately tried to trip me under the net, Chisako!" Harumi
screeched.
Chisako pulled down an eyelid while running from Harumi. "Serves you
right for spiking at me like that!" she spat back.
I should have seen it coming.
Harumi threw a bar of soap at Chisako, completely missing her, as I
thought from such a bad softball player and pitcher. The bar whirled
towards me, bashing me in the forehead and knocking me out from my
cold-water shower. I fell backwards, unnoticably and tragically into a
hot-water shower and landing on the tiled floor.
"Hey!" I glubbed. "Are you two stupid or something?!"
I first received immediate attention for medical care, but then I got
nothing but a hush from the crowd of seven girls. "What?" I choked. "Am
I bleeding?"
"Kariko..." Chisako gasped. "Is that...what happened to you?"
"Huh? What do you mean?" I looked up and saw the water splashing my
face hotly, then realizing what had happened.
I looked to the girls, finding five had left screaming, while Satori
and Harumi were cowering back. "K-Kariko!" Satori told me. "You
changed!"
I looked down and found it had happened for the first time in two
weeks. The voice tipped me off after a second of two, while my body's
change added to the confusion. I figured my hair had changed, as well,
from its turquoise color to its normal brown color. I sighed and hid
myself as much from the girls by turning quickly to the side.
"Well, it's out now, isn't it?" I told them.
"Kariko?" Harumi asked me. "You look like..."
"...a boy. Yes, it's true, but you wouldn't believe me if I told
you." I stood up and stepped under my cold shower again to demonstrate
without showing them my...distinguishing parts. I turned back to them,
showing them the reversal.
"Now, you're female?" Satori said, holding a hand to her mouth. "This
is impossible!"
Harumi had left, probably to join the girls in blabbing the truth to
her classmates or teachers. "Look, I'll tell you the truth after class,"
I sighed. "Just...don't go telling anyone, okay?"
I walked by Satori and began dressing in the now-empty locker room.
Talk about your highs and lows...

The class was mumbling secrets ever since the final bell rang. I
exhaled and walked into the classroom, once again in my male uniform. The
whispers came louder then, verifying the ideas that I definitely was the
oddest girl in school. I stood in front of the class, holding both a
kettle and a pail of water. Luckily, the teacher had left already.
"I'm sure the news has already spread like wildfire," I started, my
hand firm on the desk. "What I am about to show the class should not
brand me as a pervert or sick-minded weirdo. What I am about to show is
the product of a tragedy oversea."
I tipped the kettle on my head, just enough to empty half the water on
me without soaking the floor. I could feel it happen again, myself
growing into the proportions of my high-school uniform. I looked up to
see the class quiet, much like the reaction in the shower.
"I am actually a male," I admitted. "I am the victim of a curse that
switches my gender in hot and cold water. As odd as it seems, it's all
true."
I turned the cold water on my head to induce the opposite action, just
enough to change me back. There I stood, soaked to the bone from two
splashes and embarrassed out of my skin in front of my classmates. I
didn't expected them to understand me, and the next few actions proved it.
"Why didn't you come to school as a guy then?!" one male student pointed.
"I was stuck in a rainstorm!" I cried. "That's why I came to school
with a male uniform as a female!"
"That's no excuse!" a girl told me. "You pretended to be a girl!"
I sighed and nodded. "You're right...I tried to keep the truth away,"
I told them. "I was afraid that you might not accept me as a friend."
The class began to walk away from me, crying that I was nothing more
than a freak.
"You lied to us!"
"Eww...you perv!"
Nozumo seemed the most hurt. "And to think I almost dated someone like
you!' he scowled. "Get away from us!"
I wanted to block the door in front of them and guessed doing it
verbally was the best. "Will you listen to me?!" I yelled at them. "You
don't know what I've been through!"
Some of the class must have cared, even if it was only about ten
people, including Satori and Nozumo. "Look. I know it's hard to fathom.
Let me explain this whole mess."

It all had to start somewhere. Being an only child, I had much of the
attention a sibling would have killed for. My parents decided, for a
special going-into-high-school gift, that all three of us would go to
China. An expedition of cleansing myself, I guessed. I figure my parents
appreciated the whole Confucian thing and felt China was better than a
tour of Japan, especially since living in the central portion of Honshu
meant being everywhere possible in 14 years.
The trip was quite stimulating at first. Buddhist temples in the
middle of nowhere. The Great Wall of China. The shopping markets in
Shanghai. I even loved the bamboo forests we roamed through on a hiking
tour. The people and the country acted as if they had prepared this all
for me. For the first time in years, I felt relieved and happy, refreshed
at all this history and nature. I was prepared to go as far as studying
world culture when college would come around.
That day went horribly wrong from the start. The weather was suddenly
in no mood to cooperate for anyone, let alone myself. It took a bit of
convincing my parents to go, but I was so anxious. I was still a bit
exhilarated by the whole China thing, and it wasn't until I put on warmer
clothing and took an umbrella that the three of us trekked to the
mountains with a guide. The sights weren't all that new, lots of bamboo
and rocky areas for miles ahead of us. For the first time that day, I
could hear other things. My father yawning out of either boredom,
sleepiness, or both. The colder wind disturbing things around us.
Perhaps a rumble of thunder too far and weak to see lightning
complimenting.
Things finally got interesting with passage into a final area. Our
guide, a stout fellow with lots of mirth, showed an unusual expanse of
land that was covered with springs. There must have been a hundred or so
of the springs, each with a few bamboo poles popping out of their
surfaces, perhaps signs of an ancient Chinese training ground, I figured.
An old man accompanying us with the guide claimed they were legendary
springs of a name I have forgotten over time, with each spring containing
the legend of a drowned victim. The man also mentioned a secondary
legend, one in which swimmers in the spring would change to what drowned
there before.
The four of us agreed that they were probably only legend, while the
stout guide insisted that legends were true and that myths were not. My
parents' belief in Confucianism stopped there, at the existence of magic.
The old man himself said that legends were absolutely untrue in springs
near the back and were completely safe to swim at, but he also admitted
that no legends really applied there. I myself was very skeptical; I did
see fish poking from the surface in some, although not all, as well as
assorted aquatic animals in their own grouped areas. I dismissed this as
just a silly legend and figured everything was cool.
I joined my parents and the guide in a careful walk between the springs
and poles. He began yammering on about some other legends, and I didn't
quite hear him due to vocal distance and interest in the sights around
me. These springs were more crude than I had ever seen before. I was
used to the natural springs in Japan that had spas and resorts built
around them, the springs used only for profit and relaxation. To see
springs without anything built around it or the water being used for other
things was kind of intriguing, almost like nature in its rawest form.
Despite the bad weather and darkening skies, I was amuzed at the bright
bustle within each spring, almost as if nature had sorted out animals by
species and placed them in separate bins.
I heard my father calling me. They had continued on as I had stopped
to watch nature in action. Without thinking, I got up and began a run to
him, not realizing factors of fate were lining up against me. As I ran
forward, not figuring things to be awkwards, I stepped on a rock that was
wet from a previous shower at the same second that a sudden flash of
lighting and thunder lit up the sky. My shoes proved to be less than
gripping, as I slipped on the rock and lost my balance. Before I could do
anything, I foolishly wavered towards a pool of water, figuring it was
better to get wet than hurt.
When I cut the surface and fell underwater, I felt my entire body
tingling, almost as if I was dissolving in the spring. I closed my eyes
and wondered what was happening, if I would die in the spring from the
sensation. A few seconds passed, and the tingling passed with it, giving
me time to ascend and cut the surface again. By the time I got out, it
would be a few minutes until I could get a mirror and see what truly
happened...

"...and that's why you see me like this," I told them, wringing out my
hair slightly. "I guess the legend was true."
"What about the fish and aquatic animals, like you said?" Nozumo
asked. "Why were they there in some springs without being changed?"
"Those were previous victims, the guide told me," I responded. "Fish
and amphibians can drown, especially if there in no oxygen in the spring.
That's why some springs had all fish of one species. Same with the other
springs."
The remaining students were either silent or gone. "Still, why didn't
you say anything?" someone said to me. "If you had told us in the first
place..."
I remained quiet.
"...we would have treated you the same way we're treating you now,"
Satori spoke out, still a bit shocked. "Is that why, Kariko?"
I nodded with a sigh. "First of all, my name is Ikari, not Kariko," I
told them. "I just sliced off the first kanji and added -ko. And yeah,
that's right. If I told you guys I was like this, I would have been
treated like my last high school I attended, like a freak. The school I
had attended before this kicked me out after two weeks because of my
difference and the fights I was getting into due to it."
I picked up the pail and kettle and paused at the doorway. "Well, are
you going to laugh or yell at me yet?" I asked them. "I'm used to it by
now, so get it off your chest."
I guess I wasn't a complete freak. The five remaining people,
including Nozumo and Satori, hadn't moved or said a thing. I guessed that
they had hopefully understood my problems. I could hear Satori walking
after me, but I never let up my pace.
Except for when I was met with a hallway full of students blocking my
exit. In the front of the crowd was the principal, the same man that had
frowned upon me since day one. The only people supposedly on my side was
Satori and Nozumo.
"Matsumoto-san!" he yelled to me. "What is this I hear from the students?"
I stood with Satori and Nozumo, almost as if in military rank. "What
have they said, sir?" I asked. If they had told him, I wanted to hear it
from him alone.
He walked up to me and looked down. "I want the certified proof. Show
me who you really are."
The warm water in the kettle was just enough to change me back. I
stood up, slightly taller than both Nozumo and Satori and barely taller
than the principal. He seemed stunned, but a man of his stature was able
to easily regain his composure. He wiped his glasses a little and looked
at me square in the eye. I looked away a little, expecting the worst.
"Matsumoto-san, you are hereby suspended for a week from school," he
told me. "For one, I told you that I did not want to see you out of
uniform again, and deceiving the school and its assembly is an even worse
offense."
"Sir, it is something I could not prevent!" I shot back at his
statement pleadingly. "I changed from the rain my first day! What would
you have said if I had changed from a male to a female? Or if I had told
you about it in the first place? I'd still be kicked out!"
"It's too late for that, Matsumoto-san," he told me stubbornly. He
walked away quickly, probably knowing I was right. The class filtered off
after him and on their own paths. I was left standing less tall than I
had been seconds before, drooping next to Satori and Nozumo.
"I need a cigarette," I said to myself. Yeah, major denial had set in,
but I knew that my days at school were numbered. A nicotine rush is all I
could use to hide at the moment. I walked away from the two quickly.
Luckily, I saw Nozumo with a hand on Satori's shoulder, restraining her.
I half-smiled to myself before frowning as I fumbled in my pockets for
smokes. I began to wonder if I had become matchmaker without knowing it.

I sat next to the same tree Asako had approached me from a while ago.
At the moment all I could manage was a smoke. It calmed me pretty well
when I really needed it. I was surprised at just how well it had calmed
me after the whole debacle in class. I let it dangle from my lips for a
change, comfortable that strangers could probably look at me and not be
apalled at the sight of a schoolgirl lighting up.
But I was still devastated.
Satori and Nozumo would become a good couple and try to ignore me, I
figured. The people in class wouldn't be able to talk to me face to face,
if I was able to return to school at all. Worst case scenario was that I
would never get into a good enough school to look towards college, and
that would ruin my life from that point on. Why would this place need me
around anymore if all I would do is fill space?
I looked up at the branches overhead. The leaves were already gone
from it, victim from the autumnal season. All except one. I flicked off
an ash and watched with intent, as if I could will the leaf to fall from
the tree. I stared at it, leaped up to swipe at it, and flung pebbles at
it; I even tried shaking the thick branches by shaking the even thicker
trunk. The only way I could remove that leaf was by climbing the tree
itself.
I don't know exactly what was flying through my mind at that moment. I
hadn't the foggiest notion why I was so persistent to see the leaf off of
the tree, but I slowly scaled the trunk, ripping my uniform at the knee.
I sat on the sturdy branch and plucked the leaf, letting it flutter a full
twelve feet to the ground. Things began rushing through my mind, and
before I knew it, I was trying to climb higher to less sturdy branches.
I suppose it was suicidal at the moment. It didn't matter if it turned
kamikaze or not. No one would care if I jumped or not. I had visions of
going down off the branches in a graceful swan dive, hopefully to counter
the ugly duckling I had become. Hopefully, I wouldn't be cursed in the
afterlife, I thought to myself.
"You're giving up that easily?"
I looked downwards as carefully as I could. I could only see her face
staring up at me, but I could tell it was Asako. She had absolutely no
emotion on her face, so I wasn't sure if she was encouraging me or not.
"What do you want, Asako?" I frowned. "Go laugh like the rest of them."
Asako was now folding her arms. "They aren't all laughing, you know."
"Sympathy, laughing, they're the same thing!" I shouted. "I'm being
treated like a freak! They're all glad that it's not them!"
Asako closed her eyes. "I can't answer things for you," she told me,
"but if you feel that's the only way you can resolve things, I'm coming up
there with you."
I was almost too stunned to keep my balance. "N...no way! Stay down
there, or I jump!"
"What for?" Asako addressed. "All you people have treated me as a
freak, right? Why shouldn't I just end it like you?"
I was now more sitting on the branch than standing. "You don't have
physical differences, Asako. It's different..."
"And yet you have friends," she told me. "Probably more than I have.
Do you see me wanting to jump to my death? Do you see me slitting my
wrists?"
"But, Asako, I..."
Asako was beginning to cry underneath the tree. "The reason I said my
parents are åseparated'," she tried to say with a shaky voice, "is because
my father passed away when I was 10. My mother, she could care less what
happens to me. You have two parents that both love you, even with your
difference."
I felt terrible inside after Asako explained her situation. Not
exactly as if something died inside me, more like a severe beating. I was
so worried about myself fitting in that I had forgotten who my friends
were. Nozumo and Saotri had stood with me while I was assessed my
punishment. Now, I was a few steps from having them stand with a
tombstone. I felt so bad that I was even leaving a friend like...
"Asako..."
Asako did a very good job at stopping herself from crying. "I'm just
saying you should think about those who still see you as a friend," she
said as she regained her composure, "and I'd like to think of myself as
one of them."
I straddled the tree branch. "I was so concerned about consequences,"
I told her, "that I hadn't thought about anyone but myself. I've been
such a fool." I finally slid off the branch and made my way back down to
the ground.
"Will you be alright, Asako?" I asked. "I have to go find Satori and
apologize. I want to see if she's mad at me for not telling her sooner."
Asako nodded. She looked so vulnerable at that moment, so much
different from the vision I had of her the day I met her, but she still
had a foundation under her. She was one of those girls that seemed so
much of a loose cannon that you wouldn't expect her to be strong, but as
far as I could see, she was strong enough. I suppose I would have gone as
far as date her in the future if things weren't so jumbled, but Satori was
the first priority.
"Go ahead and talk to her. I'll be fine."
I stopped a moment. "Asako, did you know I was...?"
Asako smirked a little. "Male?" she asked. "I had faint suspicions,
and..."
I blinked a little. "And?"
"I saw you in the shower before you went to school this morning," she
grinned. "Nice package."
I blushed to myself and ran off.

Back at the school grounds, there weren't too many more people left. I
was hoping that Satori hadn't left yet and that I could still talk with
her. Out of all the people in the last hour, she seemed the most neutral,
unable to tell me how she really felt. Yeah, she and Nozumo would be
great for each other...
...if I still didn't have this small little iota of feeling for her left.
I slowed to a trot. "No," I told myself. "I can't face her as this."
I turned quickly and ran straight to a water fountain, spending little
time taking a splash to the face and shoulders. If I faced her as a guy,
I wouldn't be able to face her. She knew me better as one of her friends,
not some male stranger.
After about ten minutes, I finally found Satori off of the school
grounds and on the playground next to the school. The nice thing about
the area was that it was near a primary school for the little kids. I
once was forced to smoke my monthly nicotine crave around the area. I
have no qualms about smoking there, but I felt devastated when three kids
caught me smoking there. I quickly put it out when they did; the last
thing I ever wanted was for kids to look upon me as a mentor. It almost
made me quit completely.
Satori was sitting in the middle of the miniature merry-go-round, not
exactly the "alone on a swing" metaphor movies pictured it to be. I
didn't want to approach her too strongly, so I just stood back and cleared
my throat. She turned to acknowledge my presense and then turned back.
"You mad at me?" I asked. "You don't have to hide it or anything. I
can take it."
Satori shook her head, but still didn't face me. "No, not really," she
told me. "I mean, all that time you really had everyone fooled. All you
were was a friend..."
I sat down on the other side of the merry-go-round, my back facing
hers. "All I wanted to be was a friend," I sighed. "I tried as hard as I
could, even going as far as beginning to sell myself off as a girl."
"Maybe it's my fault," Satori told me. "For putting all my trust in
someone I never knew. I don't even think I can look at anyone else the
same anymore, Ikari."
"Satori, you can still call me Kariko," I suggested. "I don't mind."
I could tell she was shaking her head. "You know we can never go back
there, Ikari. You're supposed to be a boy. The bond's broken."
I understood Satori's direction of words. "Don't shut me out, Satori,"
I told her. "Right now, you're one of my only friends. You won't allow
me that?"
"How do I know you only wanted to be a friend?" she asked me.
I bowed my head down. "I won't deny it. There were times that I
wished I was a boy around you. I tried to hide it as long as I could. If
you don't mind, I would like to start over. As friends."
Satori stayed quiet.
"Satori, I'll put this very bluntly. If I wanted you in a way that was
more than friendship, why would I have been such a friend for so long? I
tried my hardest to forget that I was a guy. Would I do that if I was in
love with you?"
I hoped that I could hear Satori turn.
"Satori, no matter what form I am, no matter whether you date someone
or not, I want to remain your friend. And just that alone."
I could hear someone crying. Unless it was someone recording this on
camera without my knowledge, I knew it had to be Satori. I turned to see
tears flowing from her eyes, but her face was smiling instead of the
opposite.
"Did I say something wrong?" I asked her. "I'm so sorry..."
She nodded. "Ikari no baka," she sniffed. "You had to go say
something like that. I was all prepared to cry from losing my best
friend. Now, you had to make them joyful."
I was about to begin crying myself, as Satori hugged me and began
crying into my shoulder. After a good three-minute weeping session, she
let up and wiped at her eyes. "I think I probably ruined your uniform
with all that crying," she choked out. "Sorry about that."
I made a sigh of mock frustration. "Geez, and I just washed this!" I
told her.
We both ended up giggling like crazy at each other and even spun the
merry-go-round a bit. In those few minutes, it felt just like that
feeling we enjoyed before. We had forgotten how old we were, how mature
we had become, and exactly what gender I was. It was like we were kids
all over again. By the time we were finished on the merry-go-round and a
few other rides, we were out of breath and lying on the ground.
"You're too good a friend of mine, Satori," I told her when my breath
returned. "I will never try to hurt you again, okay?"
I could hear the patches of grass rustle as she nodded her head.
"So you won't complain if I can change back now? For a while?"
I heard the grass rustle a second time, hopefully from her agreement.
"You're probably going to have to remain a guy for the rest of the year,
aren't you?" she told me. "The principal knows it and will probably feel
better if you change into a girl in front of guys than into a guy in front
of girls."
"Gee, makes me feel like stepping into a locker room right now," I
smirked as I got up. "Which reminds me, I should get some hot water, and
it looks like I'll be getting it in the men's room."
Satori sat up with a leaf intertwined in her hair. "Have you been in a
men's room here?" she asked. "You sure you can't sneak into a girls'
room?"
I shook my head. "I need to get used to it," I told her. "The same
way you need to get used to seeing me the other way. Now, go and get your
things. I know you left them back at school."
I turned as soon as she got up, feeling better for a change.

End Part Three

All concepts of Ranma 1/2 and the small cameo role are property of
Rumiko Takahashi and the like. All other characters are copywritten and
property of myself.
As a slight warning, this story is an explicit story. This story does
contain some violent nature, as well as adult situations. While it is not
an actual *lemon* series, there are some sexual references and situation.
Consider your audience before showing it to them.
In other words, it's probably Rated åR'...

____________________________
My So-Called 1/2-Life
A Biography In Pieces
Fanfiction by Geoff Tebbetts
____________________________

Part Four

As far as I know, there are many bathrooms in our school. I could have
taken my time and picked one out that I knew was completely unused and
vacant. Still, I wanted to get off the school grounds as fast as I
could. Who knew if the principal was still around? I would have even
desired a smoke in victory, but the first thing I did when I entered was
drop my pack of cigarettes into the trash.
It felt odd at first that I was entering a place I hadn't seen since my
change in China, but the feeling was swift. All it took was a quick twist
of the hot-water knob and another few splashes and dunks, and I felt a
whole lot better. In the mirror, I could see myself in my reverted form.
My haircut was still the same, my brown hair cropped in its unisex style.
My face gets a little longer when I change, unavoidable when you gain
about fifty pounds. To this day, I still have no scientific explanation
why I suddenly lose mass like that.
A flush surprised me as I was straightening myself out. I turned to
see Nozumo coming out of a stall and wiping his hands. I instinctively
blushed in the way I had been programmed by my mother to be embarrassed as
a girl in such occasions, but shook it off and resumed straightening
myself up. I figured that Nozumo had been doing a bit of thinking
himself; I hadn't seen him for a while and figured the stall was where he
had disappeared to.
He began washing his hands casually, not treating it like he was
washing in an infested environment. "A little odd for you?" he asked.
"You won't be getting the same reaction when you do this when you return."
"Water off my back," I said to him. "We all go through rejection, I
suppose. It's just that...mine will be a little more widespread."
The place stayed quiet while we washed up.
"You mad at me for not being who I claimed to be?" I asked him.
"I was at first," he shrugged. "Then, it sunk in that I deserved it.
Like you said, we all go through rejection. At least now I'm sorta glad I
didn't date you as a girl."
I grinned. "What? I'm not good-looking as a girl?" I joked.
It took a second and a stare, but I finally got a laugh out of Nozumo.
"Weirdo."
I shrugged, wiped my hands, and stuck one out to Nozumo. "Well, this
weirdo's ready to bury the hatchet," I told him. "Square one?"
Nozumo thought a second and then tentatively shook my hand. "Square
one," he responded. "You intend to pursue Satori now that you're a guy?"
I shook my head. "No, we'll always be strictly friends. You?"
"Well, I might. Not sure. She is kinda nice."
I grinned. "She likes you. You might as well try."
I had finally settled differences with those I wanted to that day.
However, when I heard a loud scream coming from the school yard, almost
like that of...
Nozumo rushed out to investigate while I stayed in the room. A few
seconds later, Nozumo ran back in. "Satori's in trouble!" he shouted.
"Three guys are threatening her in the school yard!"
"Damn it!" I cursed. "She didn't send the police after them?"
"Who are they, Ikari?"
My mind was spinning at the sudden repercussions. I held my head as I
turned away, catching a glimpse of a small, colored puddle in the stall
area. If they wanted me, I'd give them something they were and weren't
expecting.
"I'll explain later!" I told him. "Stall for me! Tell them that the
blue-haired girl will be out soon! When I distact them, get Satori away
from them."
"Are you nuts?!"
"Do you want to help her or not?"
"Well, what are you going to do?"
"A long shot," I told him. "It might be difficult, and it might be
disgusting, but it's just so crazy it just might work."

I straightened out my skirt. Luckily, the one Satori brought me that
day was a little oversized. Not enough to show my curves during the day,
but just enough to show them right now, so to speak. I adjusted my hair
in the mirror and fixed my bow. The plan would be two-way. Depending on
my situation, I would have to be either seductive or submissive. I took a
second to mull over my drastic change in the past few days. I was so
intent on a war with these guys that all my "feminine charm" my mother had
managed to implant in me was gone. I wasn't really mad she had; in fact,
I wasn't really mad at anyone.
Just those three idiots in the school grounds.
I stepped out of the men's room and walked outside, hoping that all
conditions would be right. It would help if the combined IQ of the guys
was in the double digits. If anything, I could at least delay the fight
long enough for either Nozumo to get Satori away from them or for someone
to get the police here on time. I just kept asking myself why I was crazy
to do such a thing.
"Maybe I just need adrenaline for a change," I said to myself.
I walked outside and quickly kneeled in a shady area of the school
grounds. The sun was beginning to cast shadows, so I tried taking
advantages of them. Once I made it down on my knees, I ducked my head to
hide myself better. I managed to catch a glimpse before they were out of
eyesight. Sure enough, the guy in the shades was looking for me with the
heavy-set guy, while the taller, lanky-looking partner was holding Satori
back in one arm and a knife in his other hand.
Just my luck that he had the knife. Nozumo would never help now.
"It's her, boss," I heard the lanky one crow. "Blue hair, just like
you said."
"Well," I could hear the leader say smoothly, "looks like your little
friend couldn't run any further. Good thing she didn't, or you'd be
breathing through your neck, sister."
"Don't call me åsister'!" I could hear Satori cuss. "Ikari, run away!"
"Let...let her go," I said in a wavering and innocent-sounding falsetto
voice. "You wanted me, didn't you? Shouldn't you trade her for me, since
she didn't tell the police like you probably threatened her to do?"
I could hear someone's boots scrape closer. "Very good judgement," I
could hear the leader say. He wasn't the one moving towards me. "Yes, we
told her not to tell. Now that we have both of you girls where you
deserve to be, I think we'll have some fun with the both of you still."
"Please!" I begged of the leader. "She won't do any harm! I swear!
Just let her go!"
I could feel the big one next to me. His hand reached for my head and
grabbed a fist full of hair. I would have cried at the pull, if he hadn't
let go in confusion.
"Ewww! Man! What the hell is this stuff?" he shouted as he looked at
the sick blue film on his hand. He took his time to wipe his hand on his
shirt, giving me enough time to look up at him from my kneeling position.
I could see his forehead raise in even more confusion.
"Hello, big guy," I grinned at him. "Care to dance?"
Before he could question what was going on, I socked him hard in the
stomach, doubling him over in pain. I had only one target in mind and
swung at him with a kick from my right foot. I almost got caught
reminiscing back to that soccer goal, as I planted my foot in the only
weak spot I knew we males had. He hunched over in immediate pain, as I
jumped to my feet.
I could see the leader and the thin guy in utter speechlessness.
Nozumo had taken my cue perfectly and managed to quickly sneak up on the
thin punk. He managed to separate Satori from him with a push. The push
also separated the punk from his knife, giving Nozumo an opportunity to
level the guy with a punch to the face. Nozumo was probably only a few
more pounds heavier than I was in male form, but he had lots of momentum
working for him and floored him like a crash-test dummy.
I had only one thing left to do. Nozumo tended to Satori, while I
squared off against the leader. He seemed uneasy with what he saw, me in
a girl's uniform, but still confident enough for a fight. I set myself
parallel to his stance, brandishing my fists and standing firm.
"What is this, a joke?" he asked me. "You aren't even a...'her'. You
aren't even remotely close to being her."
"I'm closer than you think, you fool!" I grinned. "You can't even tell
when it's a guy in a seifuku? Such poor taste in women!"
The punk shook his head and pulled something out of his pocket.
Thankfully, it wasn't a gun, but it was still a mean set of brass
knuckles. "You know, I wish I didn't loan my knife to Keiji," he said.
"The guy was never strong enough to defend himself. I'll have to do this
the hard way."
He stepped forwards and swung down in an odd fashion. Now, I'm no real
fighter, but he must have been initially disturbed at my pictured state.
It was easy for me to hit him hard in the chops and back him up. It might
have been a huge mistake; backing him up gave him another chance for him
to swing, geting a shot to my side with his knuckled fist. We both
exchanged another two set of blows before we stepped back and observed the
other's conditions.
"Yeah, keep trading blows with me, you cross-dressing perv," he told me
with a smirk. "Every time I hit you, I hurt you twice as much as you to
me."
I grit my teeth. He probably busted a rib or two and raised some good
bruises. He was faster than his pretty-boy lax attitude showed. I had to
stop his advances with more confusion. The more I would hit him, the more
I'd have to be hit in return, and I wasn't ready to lose to him!
He swung again, and everything seemed to go slow-motion. He socked me
in the face with his unknuckled fist and countered with his other, the
light tracing an arc from the setting sun catching the brass. I ducked
quickly and turned, purposely letting the skirt I wore flip upwards. When
I completed the full-circle turn, he was a completely different man, mouth
agape and cheeks flustered. Within the next split-second, I discovered
just how many teeth could fall out of one's open mouth by sending a kick
into it. He sprawled like a plane crashing and smashed against the
ground, out like a light.
I huffed hard and winced at the pain it caused. As I could hear Nozumo
and Satori scuffling forwards, I folded myself down and held my chest. I
misjudged the number of broken ribs by about two.
"Ikari!" I could hear Satori cry out. "Are you okay?!"
I nodded with gritted teeth. "Broken ribs, bruises," I choked. "At
least I have teeth left."
I looked up to see Nozumo's eyes wide. "What the hell did you do to
your hair?" he asked me. "It looks like dye..."
"You'll think it's gross," I told them. "What else was blue in the
men's room?"
Nozumo made a face. "Aw, man! You used that blue-colored toilet water
to do that?!" he said with bulging eyes. "That's sick!"
"It worked...didn't it?" I coughed, even though it hurt a lot.
Satori looked confused. "But why did he just stop like that?" she
asked, panic still washing over her. "When you turned, he just...froze."
I stood up and tried thinking of different things than pain. "Part two
of the plan," I laughed and cried quietly. I flipped up the skirt's hem
by rising quickly, still holding my chest. The two of them caught a
glimpse and gave me looks that were even blanker than the punk's.
"Ikari!" Nozumo twitched. "That's...that's..."
"...gross, too?"
"Well...yeah. I would never have thought of that!"
Satori began giggling. "You wore girls' underwear?!" she laughed out
in tears. "No wonder he freaked out! You weirdo!"
I clasped my skirt shut. "Don't announce it!" I yelled back. "Geez,
why don't you just take a picture of it and show everyone! I wanted to
freak him out, not embarrass myself silly, thank you!"
When I finally managed to straighten up, I could see Satori and Nozumo
smiling. "You may be a weirdo," Satori told me, "but you two saved my
life. After all that had happened before, when I should have told the
police in the first place."
Nozumo supported Satori as she leaned against her. "It's not your
fault, Satori," he told her. "You cared a lot for Ikari. I would have
done the same thing if I was in that spot."
I grinned at the two. "You know, you two look cute together," I
insisted, "even after we had to go through all that."
They instinctively blushed as we all stood there and looked in opposite
directions. Denial. I had seen it before. It was like me when I was
shopping with Satori, denying I had a thing for her. We sat there a
while, until I made the first suggestion.
"Now, let's get out of here before anyone sees me like this..."

Epilogue

I yawned and woke up slowly in the morning. There had been a rainfall
last night, and I luckily hadn't been caught in it. It was pretty good
when I woke up after a night shower; the air just feels so crisp and new
when it comes in through a window. Today, the sun was a bit kinder than
it was the whole week, not beating and baking like it had been doing.
I leaned up as carefully as I could. I could still feel the ribs
creaking when I leaned sometimes, but I knew that they were mostly healed
underneath. I still wore some bandages wrapped around my midsection for
support, but I was starting to feel a whole lot better. It had been a
week since the courts had jailed those three punks for a while, so the
pain wasn't from the thought that they'd be returning soon.
After a shower, preferably a warm one, and a little bit of stretching
to work the ribs and torso, I walked back to my room and measured change.
The room was still a blue and pink blend, but it was tolerable. My mother
managed to sell most of the dolls, clothes, and objects that made the room
pretty, but I agreed with her about keeping some clothes. They were only
for emergencies, in case I had to do hiding again, but I felt that I'd be
better off being more open with my curse.
Gee, that must be the first time I used that word in a while. Curse...
I made my way downstairs after I had dressed myself for school. After
a fourth day of wearing a boy's uniform, I felt much more used to the
feeling. A white shirt freshly pressed, a navy blue suit jacket, and
pants to match. The shoes and tie were the only constrictions in the
uniform, but it would have to be something I'd live through. At least it
was better than showing up in a seifuku. I made sure that Mom lived up to
my standards and checked my closet daily to make sure it wasn't there.
Mom was in the kitchen, preparing some breakfast for the family, while
Dad was already beginning to eat, readinga morning paper, and paying
attention to government details. Mom had lost the excitement of preparing
a daily bentou for me, but it didn't bother her too much. I wondered
exactly what it must have been like for her to have me switch back after
all of the hard work she went through to make me her daughter, but she was
looking more energetic this time around. My dad said it was because there
was one more man in the family to do all of the hard work. He had felt
guilty before when I was cursed, but it had been his mutual agreement with
my mother to keep me as a girl before and as a guy now. I questioned just
who wore the pants in the family, but Dad was happy to have a child in the
family, no matter the gender.
After our hellos and goodbyes, I left the house and made my way to the
street. Nozumo was waiting there with a bookbag flung over his shoulder.
Ever since the incident at school, we had begun to hang out with each
other. It was cool actually having a male friend for a change. Even
though I still got looks from other guys, Nozumo defended his friendship
with me by seeing through my problem. At least someone understood.
"Hey, you weirdo," he grinned.
"Yo, you insensitive jerk," I grinned back. It was a running gag of
ours to go shooting each other down when we met up. It was all in good
spirits.
"I still can't believe you decided to stick with bluish hair," he
pointed out to me. "It makes you look so contrasting in your uniform."
"I told you that it was a precaution," I responded. "If I change this
time, at least it will delay revealing my change for a few seconds."
Nozumo nodded, suddenly nodding a bit too far backwards. "What's the
big idea?" I heard someone say behind me.
I turned to see Satori with Nozumo's collar in her grip. "You're
supposed to wait for me!" she scolded. "No head-starts!" She looked the
part of being angry, but she couldn't keep her giggle away.
"You're so slow, though, Satori-chan," he shrugged off. "If you're
going to go out with me, you're going to have to be faster than that."
That got both of them running. Satori chased after Nozumo with her
bookbag swinging. I couldn't help but laugh and run after them before
they called me slow. It was amazing what a little time had done. Nozumo
and Satori had been on a few dates, and it seemed that they were a very
nice couple. I felt that it would have been nice being in Nozumo's
position, but things were so much better this way.
We stopped at the school's entrance once I caught up with them. There
was still plenty of time before class, a whole thirty minutes. The people
in the school yard were finally used to seeing me both male and out of the
spotlight from the trial, so many either waved or didn't notice me.
"So, see you after school ends then?" Satori asked me.
I nodded. "Remember, I start and end school after you guys do," I
pointed out, "so don't try getting me out of class early, okay? You tried
it before and I had to stand in the hall because of it."
Satori nodded.
"How is the academy working out for you?" Nozumo asked. "It's so much
more formal and sophisticated than ours with the snappy uniform and all.
You even have the seal on your lapel."
I shrugged. "I'm surprised that it's gone so well," I told them.
"Sure, it's a bit more work, and I have to go by bus a little way every
day, but the school seems to understand a bit more than here. I told the
school board about my problem, and they said that it wouldn't be a problem
there. If they say so, I hope it will turn out okay."
"It's too bad that the principal here kicked you out," Satori sighed.
"He must be gloating in that office of his."
I shook my head. "He didn't win," I said. "If anything, this might
help me get into a good college. I've already made some friends there..."
Satori and Nozumo went silent as I paused.
"...but they aren't real replacements."
They returned to smiling. "So, what do we do this afternoon?" Satori
beamed. "Another mall fling? I'm sure Chisako and Harumi will come
around. They've been wanting to apologize all week."
"Sounds good to me," I responded.
Out of the corner of my eye, I could see a figure coverse with someone
and then catch me in their eye, as well. I looked over to see Asako
grinning at me and giving me a wave. I waved back in return.
Nozumo and Satori also noticed. "Asako's been rather friendly lately,"
Nozumo pointed out. "I wonder what's with her?"
"She and I are going on a date Saturday."
They stared back at me like I had just said something taboo. "What?" I
asked them. "She's not weird at all."
Satori looked at me oddly. "But isn't she a...?"
I shook my head. "She's more normal than you think, Satori. She just
needed someone to understand her for a change, that's all." Satori and
Nozumo seemed to understand, probably beginning to dispell their thoughts
of Asako.
I could see the clock five minutes before Satori and Nozumo had their
homeroom period. "Oh, man! I'm going to miss the bus!" I told them, as I
started running. "I'll catch you later, guys!"
They waved back at me and said their goodbye messages, while I ran. As
far as I know, the bus driver was an unforgiving person for lateness. The
way I had started feeling that week, I didn't really mind catching the bus
or not. By the way I had been uplifted and allowed to be my free self for
a change, even if I had missed the bus, I could fly there myself.

FIN

** A note from the author **

In truth, this story is really an overlap of Ranma 1/2 and a shoujo
anime or a high-school drama, to put someone torn with a curse like
Ranma's in a dramatic high-school role. Ranma himself just wasn't
appropriate for the role, nor were his friends and enemies. They just
didn't seem to be serious enough to place in such a spot. I wanted to
tell about the difficulties that such a curse just might bring up in a
real society, sort of the opposite that Rumiko Takahashi might have aimed
for with her story.
At first, I was going to rewrite the experience of being an
aquatransexual in the eyes of a normal kid at school that was average in
grades, looks, and, most importantly, fighting ability. As I continued, I
realized just how much this was turning into a high-school drama with the
twist, bringing about the title of my story.
To all those expecting characters from Ranma 1/2 to appear (except for
the cameo by the Jusenkyo guide, who is copywritten by Rumiko Takahashi
and Shogakukan), I apologize if you have been disappointed about it. I
felt that establishing a new set of characters would give the story a
fresh start and new views on what the curse brings. We all know how
Ranma, Akane, Shampo, Ryouga, and the others are affected by Jusenkyo;
now, you can see a whole new approach to it. Is it an
"alternative-universe" story for Ranma 1/2? Develop your own conclusions
about it, since I never made any indications.
As for why I seem to enjoy the first-person style (in this and my
current series, "If The Shoe Fits..."), I just felt it would have been
difficult to write in an outside manner. I wanted to reveal Ikari's
thoughts alone, and I felt that neither third-person omniscient or
observer styling was appropriate. Third-person selective styles, or
narrators that only can know what Ikari was thinking, also seemed wrong; I
wanted to show this in Ikari's style of a confused teen trying to identify
himself (or herself).
I thank Rumiko Takahashi for her contribution Ranma 1/2 has given the
world, as well as the writers of all the other anime titles that
influenced me. For those who did survive reading my third story, I
appreciate that you took the time to read it. Anyone can write a story,
but this would be nothing without readers and friends that helped me read,
review, and re-review this story. Hopefully, this is just the first mile
of many to come in the marathon.

--
Geoff Tebbetts
gteb...@vt.edu
Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University