[Ranma][FanFic] Biker 1/2 chapter 19
Calum Wallace
Okay, so we're both sick of you saying it's my fault. So stop.
I hate to say this, but I've forgotten what it was again...
Words in "<this>" kind of brackets are spoken in Cantonese. Those in
"{this}" are in wolf-speak.
Chapter 19: Of Wolf and Man
"Light a candle for the sinners... Set the world on fire" - Marilyn Manson,
'1996'
************************************
Mu Tze wheeled back round. The combine harvester he had just apparently
flattened Ranma with was beginning to distort.
"What the blue blazes?"
Shampoo let out an angry snarl. "Learn for to swear!"
The combine harvester exploded.
************************************
Akira jerked his head up.
"What the hells?"
Takashi winced. "Someone's just first changed, Boss."
Akira sniffed at the air.
"Oh, shit... It's Ranma! What the fuck? I could have sworn he was weeks
off!"
Mi Soon rolled out of her truck's cab. "Well, you were wrong! Let's go!"
The trio sprinted round the house.
The scene that met their eyes was that of Ranma, now approximately nine foot
tall, triple his former bulk and decidedly lupine, standing in the middle of
a shredded combine harvester while Mu Tze threw an assortment of
increasingly heavy things at him. Ranma batted each and every object out of
the air, smashing most of them to bits.
"Mu Tze! That idiot!"
Akira started moving to intercept Ranma but before he had got five feet the
biker boy charged, blurringly fast. He smashed into Mu Tze and landed a
powerful uppercut in the Chinese boy's chin. This was followed up by a
roundhouse kick which sent Mu Tze sailing down the street and clean through
a brick wall.
Ranma howled and charged again, heading for Mu Tze's hole in the wall. A
ballpane hammer flew out and smacked him in the face then a safe crashed
into the hole sealing it shut.
Ranma grabbed the safe and ripped it into bits. Akira shoved his hand in
Shampoo's pocket. Before she could even squeak let anone slap him he had
come back out with her Makarov clenched in his hand.
"Wolfsbane?"
"Wha... Is so..."
"Good." Akira leveled the gun and fired a single shot, just as Ranma backed
out of the hole in the wall. The young werewolf had Mu Tze by the hair. He
had alreeady bitten one of the Chinese boy's arms off.
The bullet punched a neat hole in Ranma's other hand. Ranma immediately
slumped to the floor, stunned by the shock of shapeshifting. Mu Tze's
detatched arm dropped to the ground with an audible splat.
Akira sighed and walked over to the two slumped youths.
"Let's get them inside."
Mi Soon nodded. "Yeah... is Mu Tze still alive?"
"Just. Idiot's luck... five more seconds and Ranma would have finished
ripping him to bits. Somebody bring the poor stupid kid's arm."
"I should be able to graft the damn thing back on... you got any staples?"
************************************
Ranma glared out the window, caefully keeping his eyes off the Amazon
encampment.
"This is fucked."
He glanced at his leather jacket. It was now crisscrossed with a network of
stitching. From where it had ripped apart when he shapeshifted.
He'd never forget the taste of Mu Tze's blood when he came round.
"I ain't some goddamn canibbal!"
He grabbed a neaby set of practise weights and threw them out the window.
There was a clang then an angry yell. Someone with a Chinese accent bawling
about their truck.
"Aw, great."
He stuck his head out the window. Sure enough, the weights had landed square
on the roof of one of the Amazon's trucks and left a massive dent.
The truck's owner was clutching an AK in one hand and shaking her fist at
him with the other. He suddenly got angry.
"GO FUCK YERSELF, SLAPPER!"
He pulled his head back in the window. A couple of seconds later half a
dozen bullet holes appeared in it. Ranma lost his temper.
He leapt neatly out the window and charged, coming to a halt scant inches
from the startled woman.
He grabbed her by the gun wrist and lifted her off her feet. Her AK tumbled
to the ground.
"I said go fuck yerself." He kicked the gun up and caught it then dropped
her. As she picked herself up he took the gun by the magazine, pressed the
butt against his shoulder then flexed his arm. The magazine ripped out of
the receiver and a couple of shots went off into the ground.
He snarled and ripped what was left of the gun in two.
"Ya don't wanna fuck with me, bitch." He handed her the remains of her AK47
and stormed back into the house.
************************************
Akane shot upright at the first gunshot. She pulled out her .44 then paused.
Hadn't that come from the direction of the Amazon encampment?
There was a distinct sound of rending metal punctuated by a couple more
shots then Ranma came into the house. Hadn't he been in their room?
"Goddamn stupid triggger happy fuckin' Amazon psycho bitch!"
She wheeled round. Ranma was heading for the stairs.
"Ranma?"
"Leave me th' fuck alone! I'm a fuckin' monster, right?"
Akane groaned. "Not that shite again! We're all in the same boat here,
Ranma!"
"Yer not th' one who just woke up with a lump o' some stupid dick's arm in
his gob! So don't gimme any o' that bullshit!"
"Goddamnit, will you listen to me!"
"No I fuckin' won't! I gotta get this crap figured in my own fuckin' head
an' there ain't nothin' ya can damn do! Got it?"
"Ranma, I-"
"FUCKIT LAY OFFA ME!"
"I just-"
"FUCK SAKE!"
"I just want to-"
"FUCK SAKE FUCK SAKE FUCK SAKE!"
"I just want to help!"
"There ain't nothin' ya can do! Goddamnit, I need ta think! C'mon, gimme
some elbow room here!"
He suddenly rushed upstairs. Akane heard their bedroom door crash shut.
She burst into tears. Shampoo came up behind her and put a hand on her
shoulder.
"Akane..."
"GO AWAY!"
"You not need for bite I head off!"
"Oh god, Shampoo! How can you be so damned calm about this?"
Shampoo sighed and sat down on the stairs.
"I not be calm. But I not think about so I not go mental."
Akane let out a low moan. "I'm going for a walk... before I go crazy."
"I see later." Shampoo got up and headed upstairs. She paused outside her,
Akane and Ranma's mutual bedroom door.
Damnit, it was her bedroom too. She quietly opened the door. Ranma was
standing and staring out the window again.
"Ranma?"
"Get outta here. Fer all I know I'm about ta punk an' rip ya ta bits."
Shampoo walked over to him and leant against him.
"You no do. You care for I. I know be true that you not able for hurt I..."
"Aw God, Shampoo... I just dunno anymore. Look, I bit that Moose guy's arm
clean fuckin' off an' it just felt so goddamn right... I still had a lump o'
his fuckin' arm in my gob when I woke up... that wuz why I hurled." The
resistance suddenly vanished out of his body. Shampoo gently shoved him back
onto the bed. He obediantly sat down and put his head on her shoulder as she
joined him.
"Shampoo... this stuff ain't easy ta say... but... look, I dunno if I'll be
able ta keep from goin' crazy again... then maybe there won't be anyone
around ta stop me."
"I know. I is in same state, remember?"
"Stop me if I'm wrong here, but ya didn't rip someone's arm off."
"I was aiming for stupid skater girl's throat when you shot I."
"Yeah, but ya didn't!"
Shampoo sighed and pulled her camoflage shirt off. She casually tossed it on
top of his leather jacket.
She pulled the lower hem of her T-shirt up.
"Take look, please..."
Ranma glanced round then stared at her exposed belly.
"In few weeks you be daddy." She grabbed his hand and pressed it against her
belly. "Is noting anyone can do for to stop."
"What if I go nuts?"
Shampoo sighed. She grabbed her AK from where it was propped by the bed,
loaded it, kicked off a shoe and pressed it's muzzle against her bare foot.
"Is not big chance of happen."
"WHAT THE FUCK'RE YA DOIN'!?!?"
Shampoo pointed her leg and the gun barrel at a wall and fired. She yelped
as a hail of bullets ripped a hole clean through her foot.
"Aaaah... stings... Watch."
Ranma stared as the hole closed up.
"We heal much fast, Ranma."
"Fucking hell... I never figured it'd be that quick!"
"Akira shot you through hand. You no see hole, huh?"
"But what if-"
"Ranma, it no happen. I be round with Makarov. Akane be round with six-gun.
You be round with Browning. If one of we go mental then there be way for
stop, no?"
Ranma shut his eyes for a second. "Yeah... why didn't you..."
"Akira grab gun before I be able for to move."
"Akira shoved his fuckin' filthy mitt down yer trouser leg? I'll bet th'
shithead copped a cheap feel while he wuz about it! That old shit is dead
meat soon as I get this shapeshiftin' under control... Goddamnit, what the
hell kind o' monsters are we? People don't stop bleedin' that quick!"
"So Kasumi no be person, that be what you say?"
"Huh? Where'd that come from?"
"Is - how you say - logical conclusion. If you no person since you werewolf
then what Kasumi be? She daughter of werewolf."
"Oh yeah... Akira did say th' Tendo line're wasnames - Amerai?"
"Is so. This mean Kasumi be werewolf like as not."
"Damnit to hell... But I can't imagine her punkin' like I did!"
"You not usually go crazy. Is shock of having combine harvester dumped on,
that be what Akira and Mi Soon say."
"Yeah? Damn, is that stupid Moose dick still alive?"
"Mi Soon say him live. Is pity."
"How can ya say that? I ain't got th' right ta waste him 'cause he's a
jealous dickhead. Hey, he's an obnoxious twat, but - Fuck it. We gotta talk
ta Mi Soon... an' Akira. An we gotta do it now. We gotta get this shit under
control."
************************************
Mi Soon had just finished stapling Mu Tze's arm back on when she heard Ranma
approaching. And Shampoo with him.
"Ah, so you've woken up."
Ranma grunted. "Yeah, I have. An' I wanna know how ta get this shapeshiftin'
crap under control."
"Ranma Saotome, you already have it under control."
"What th' fuck're ya talkin' about?"
"Once you have finally changed for the first time the shift is under your
control within a couple of hours. Akira aimed his shot so only just enough
wolfsbane to knock you out of the Battle Madness would enter your system."
"Ya what? So how do I do this crap?"
"I suggest you go and splash yourself with cold water, Ranma. And see if you
notice anything different."
"Huh?"
"Just do it."
"Yeah, yeah whatever."
Shampoo narrowed her eyes. "What about I?"
"Ah, Xian Pu. Your case is somewhat different... Ranma hit you with enough
wolfsbane to prevent you shapeshifting for several days... I calculated the
quantity and it should have worn off."
"So what th' fuck's that supposed ta mean?"
"Go and get yourself wet before I fling you in the pond, Ranma."
Ranma snorted and stalked off, muttering obscenities under his breath.
Shampoo glared at Mi Soon.
"<Now look what you've gone and done! I just finally managed to talk him out
of his sulk and now he's raging again! Why aren't you taking him
seriousley?>"
"<I am. His curse has also become voluntary now his instincts have told him
how to shapeshift. If he splashes himself I think he's in for a big
suprise.>"
"<You what?>"
"Now, how to shapeshift... Pretend to be a wolf. Run around on all fours.
Come on, growl at me." Mi Soon grinned. "Show me you still care..."
Shampoo shot the Amazon elder a doubtful look. A couple of other teenage
Amazons wandered over.
"<Hey, Xian Pu! Just learning to shift?>"
She nodded. "<Yeah...>"
"<Go on - pretend you're a wolf. It works, really!>"
Shampoo continued her doubtful look but crouched down anyway. "<Grrrr... big
bad wolf... grrr...*>"
Her growl changed. She blinked a couple of times as a tail pushed her
trousers down. She tried to say 'What?' but all that came out was a growl...
Not that she noticed. "{Er, how come I'm still talking?}"
One of the other teenagers laughed. "<Listen to yourself. You're not
talking, you're growling.>"
Shampoo paused. "{Er - am I? Oh yeah...}" She peered at herself, puzzling at
how her perfume had suddenly got so strong. And why everything was in black
and white.
A huge splash then an exhaultant and very male yell of "YA FUCKIN' BEAUTY!"
came from the direction of the pond.
************************************
Ranma sat dwn on the bed and pulled his trousers off.
"Man, I'm beat. What a fuckin' day. What a fuckin' week." He grinned. "But
at least I don't hafta worry about the damn curse no more..."
Akane snorted and laid back. "Yeah." She picked her gun up off the table and
slid it under the pillow then paused.
"What the hell's this?"
"Ya what?"
Akane removed the offending object and peered at it. "A tape? It's got 'play
me' written on it."
"Well, what th' fuck're ya waitin' fer?"
Akane shoved the tape into her stereo and pressed play. There was a pause
then the sound cut in on Genma's voice.
"...n the shit that it's over our heads."
Akira snorted. "Genma, Soun - don't let a little setback end your world."
"Little setback?!?!"
"That's the understatement of the year!"
"Boys, boys. Haven't you noticed - Ranma is in the middle of his teens.
Teenage rebellion rules OK. I dare say he'll settle down in the near
future."
Genma snorted. "I wouldn't count on it. He takes after his grandfather in
more ways than one. And you know what Dad was like as well as I do."
Akira snorted again. "Until that big fight."
"Until that big fight," Genma sighed. "But his sacrifice was not in vain."
"Hell, it's thanks to him that we're here today. That's half the reason his
line became the successors - that and to complete the union with the
Moroboshi line."
"I know, Akira. I know. I sure as hell know it wasn't because of me. Genma
'fat dick' Saotome, that's me."
"You've been listening to Ranma swear at you too much, boy. You didn't kill
eighty of our enemies finest in a very messy way for nothing."
"Face it, Akira. I didn't get jack shit for that - unless you count three
bullet holes and a claw slash or ten."
"You defy me too?"
"Yes. I damn well do. Face it, I'm sick of toeing your line. Oh no, I'm not
going to do anything about it, but sure as hell I'm going to make a lot of
noise about it!"
"Watch your tongue, Genma. That's fighting talk."
There was a thud, as of someone fat jumping to their feet. "And I still
don't understand why the hell you had me pull half the stuff on Ranma you
did! I mean, why the hell Jusenkyu? Even though we know exactly what that
place means? And why the deal with Kounji? You damn well know that's going
to cause nothing but trouble - and not for me! For my son!"
"Shut up, sit down and listen to me. Before I rip your face off, boy.
Jusenkyu was simple - several children have undergone their First after a
dip in one of those springs. Kounji is mundane. He can't cause too much
bother - he doesn't matter and neither does his daughter. Mundanes do not
count."
Genma sighed. "Akira, I think you're being too old-fashioned for anyone's
good."
"What you think doesn't matter, boy. What the Clan requires is all that
counts! Your son WILL replace me - there's no two ways about it. And I don't
give a flying fuck about your ill - informed humanist opinions, boy. You
will do what you're told if you know what's good for you."
"I doubt Ranma will see it the same way as you do, Akira."
"What do I care about the boy's opinions?"
"They mean everything where Ranma's concerned, because if you try to force
him to go against them you get him, Ryoga, Shampoo, Akane, Ranko, Mortise
and possibly that Prince Herb character upside the head. Ranma wrestled a
large bear when he was twelve. He killed it. Ryoga is substantially stronger
than him - she could pick me and my bike up and lift me and my bike over her
head when she was thirteen. It's weird - she used to be very weak. Something
happened to her one time she was lost."
"Hmph - you've accepted Ryoga's sex-change very readily."
"Yeah, because I care about my children's feelings! You do know that
Nodoko's got her families katana, don't you?"
"You what? You let her keep it?"
"It wasn't a matter of 'let', Akira. She's as bloody minded as Ranma."
"Why didn't you just forceably take it off her?"
"That's oh so easy for you to say. Trying to take something off of HER? That
would be as good as committing suicide!"
"Oh for- She's Mundane, boy!"
"That doesn't mean very much, old man. Remember which Mundanes you're
talking about there? The Moroboshi family?"
Akira snorted. "We beat them once and we can beat them again!"
"We beat them once by backstabbing, ganging up and playing dirty! But now
they're family so it's a hell of a lot more personal!"
"Now look here, boy!"
"No, you look here. I'm right and you damn well know it! It's not me who
just got his ass kicked, remember?"
"That's not the point. I could have taken him easily and we both know why I
couldn't. He's not ready to know and he just proved it."
"Mortise knows." Soun pointed out. "He thinks very highly of Ranma and I
reckon it's only a matter of time before either he tells the kids or Nabiki
twigs and tells them."
Genma snorted. "Nabiki's already twigged. Why she's not told Ranma I don't
know."
"Absolute rubbish! Of course she hasn't figured out! She's seventeen and a
girl. No way can she have figured."
It was Soun's turn to snort. "You don't know Nabiki. Anything worth knowing
she knows. And this is most definitely worth knowing."
"You're getting worked up over nothing-"
"No we're not. Nabiki's smelt a rat bigstyle and I know it. One of my
contacts told me she was asking about the Saotomes, the Tendos and the
Amazons and getting answers. Answers that happen to be accurate."
"Such as?"
"What we really are. She knows, but I don't know if she believes it."
"She's a girl. Of course she won't believe that!"
"I wouldn't be so sure. She's been scared shitless lately. Any idiot can
smell the fear stink coming off her. Ranma offered to help her and she said,
and I quote 'it isn't something that can be dealt with by beating the shit
out of it.' She knows, all right. How much is suspicion I don't know, but
she does know our kind exist."
"Oh, hell."
Genma snorted. "Well she's one less kid who's going to be scared halfway to
a heart attack."
"That self same shock is a vital ingredient of initiation!"
"I don't see why we need to make our kids think they can't trust us. Ranma
tends to kill people he doesn't trust - and if he had a weapon like that you
would be dead, Akira Saotome. The boy has the best fighting instincts I have
ever seen."
Akira snorted. "Rubbish! I have too much experience."
"Ranma's fought to other people's death sixty odd times, Akira. He knows how
to kill quickly and efficiently - if he needs to. And he killed a guy who
once beat you. Remember that mad master fifteen years ago?"
"For fuck sake, Genma! Your son just isn't ready to know what we are,
damnit! And the crap he gave me just goes to prove it!"
There was a scuffling sound then a thud and straining noises.
"Like I said, sit down and shut up unless you want me to rip your fucking
face off, brat. I respected your father for what he was capable of. But you?
You are a worm. I'm warning you, Genma. You will be punished for defying-"
The tape cut out.
Ranma looked up at Akane. His eyes were positively blazing.
"That fuckin' does it. Akira's gonna die."
"Ranma, are you sure you've thought this through?"
"Nope. If I do I'll leave that piece of shit ta cause Dad trouble! Dad maybe
a stupid fatass piece of boke but he's still my dad an' nobodys allowed ta
fuck with him except me!"
He pulled his jacket back on and stormed out the door. After casting around
the Amazon camp for a few moments he found Akira chatting with Mi Soon
beside the Amazon matriarch's truck.
"Hey, ya arrogant fuckhead! I just heard some shit an' I don't fuckin' like
it! There ain't nobody fuckin' threatens my dad!"
"What are you prattling on about?"
Ranma laughed. "Ya stupid dick! Ya shoulda figured out someone round here's
a whizz with bugs. Ya remember our little brawl? Th' time I beat ya up?
Well, on th' tape I got it wuz just after then an' ya gave Dad all this shit
I ain't gonna let slip!"
Akira stood up and glared at Ranma.
"You should be careful with your wild accusations, boy."
"Go fuck yerself, shit-fer-brains!"
"Are you trying to start a fight?"
Ranma snorted. "Nope." He launched a kick at Akira's head. The older man
slid round it. "I ain't fuckin' TRYIN'! I'm fuckin' DOIN'!!"
Akira backpedalled. Ranma was working himself into a frenzy.
"Ohshitohshitohshit!"
"SHIT THIS!"
'This' was Ranma's boot. There was a horrible familiarity in the way it
flashed past Akira's face.
"Ohshi-"
Akira tipped over backwards with a line of muddy footprints up his front.
Ranma grabbed a crowbar off the side of Mi Soon's truck and started
battering Akira with it.
"FUCK THIS FUCK THIS FUCK THIS!" Each 'Fuck this' was punctuated with a
blow.
Ranma suddenly stopped. He casually tossed the now L - shaped crowbar away
then gave Akira one last kick in the head.
"An' I hope ya learnt ya fuckin' lesson, ya stinkin' bastard!"
And that's another one complete.
NOTES
Next - something's gonna get broken!
*Comment taken from the cartoon strip at the beginning of the Werewolf: the
Apocalypse RPG.
C&C to dog...@ratbike.org as per usual.
GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Ratbike - A motorbike made to look as fucked up and unroadworthy as possible
while still being street legal. Normally painted flat black.
Honda CG125 - Small single - cylinder 4-stroke road bike. Not very much of
anything but supremely reliable and dirt cheap. It's reliability stems from
having very little to go wrong and a low - revving 4-stroke engine.
Honda Fireblade - Insane Honda sportsbike. Mad but beginning to show it's
age.
Supercharger - A pump driven off the crank that forces more air into the
engine thus forcing it to run faster.
Nitrous oxide - Laughing gas. A petrol - nitrous mix burns faster than a
petrol - air mix therefore produces more horsepower and more wear in the
engine.
Top yoke - The yokes are two pieces of metal that hold the front forks
together and to the bike. The top yoke is the upper one. Known as triple
clamps in the US.
Gixer - Slang for a Suzuki GSXR (one of the craziest bikes built).
Chain lube - Motorbike chain lubrication oil.
Header tank - Tank that contains the spare water for the radiator on a
sealed cooling system as found in most cars.
Gasflowing - trimming off excess metal from inside the cylinder heads to aid
the burn rate of fuel within the engine. Gives a small horsepower boost.
Final drive - the drive chain that goes from the gearbox to the back wheel
and the cogs (final drive sprockets) that it runs on.
Conrod - The bit of metal that connects the piston to the crankshaft.
Alternator - Higher tech version of a generator.
Kill switch - The engine's 'off' switch. Turns off power to the ignition.
Lid / skidlid - Slang for a crash helmet.
250 Superdream - CB250. The next up the Honda model range from the CG125 and
just a bigger version of the same.
500 Superdream - CB500. A CB250 with a bigger bore and heavier frame.
Engine clicking - An internal combustion engine heats up when run. Run it
hard and it heats up more, then when you switch off the engine will start
emitting a series of sharp clicks as the metal cools and contracts.
Stocker - unmodified factory - built vehicle.
Binned - crashed. Normally means written off.
Steering damper - a long, thin shock absorber that fits between the forks
and the frame. Helps steady the steering.