[Ranma][FanFic] Biker 1/2 chapter 24
Calum Wallace
My feet are not my fault either.
Hmm... I just realised I've completed two chapters without posting either to
RAAC. And one of them is a bit short. Hmm, I think I'll compile them into
one.
Words in "<this>" kind of brackets are spoken in Cantonese. Those in
"{this}" are in wolf-speak.
Chapter 24: Go wild
"I feel a change, back to a better day
Hair stands up on the back of my neck
In wildness is the preservation of the world
So seek the wolf in thyself...
Shape shift, nose to the wind.
Shape shift, feeling I've been.
Move swift, all senses clean.
Earth's gift, back to the meaning of wolf and man"
- Metallica, 薫f Wolf and Man'
"What did Firsting feel like? That is most explicitly none of your
business... oh, what the hell. It felt like every orgasm you've ever had,
all rolled into one then with complete and utter terror and the biggest
adrenaline rush in history on top of it. Well, that doesn't even start to
describe it. It felt good. Really good. Definitely better than sex... or
anything else I've ever experienced. Basically, if it happened to you, you
would notice... Mind you, if you went schitzo like most people do then so
would anyone else in the area." - Saotome-Tendo Enterprises CEO Nabiki
Tendo, asked to describe the sensation of first change.
***********************************
Happosai frowned. "Hey, chill out! I heard Mum's in the area and I was
looking for her. Like, what's done is done, huh? Oops, gotta go!"
Mortise stared at the swarm of yelling women who were pounding down the
street. Maybe Happosai was right - maybe leaving *would* be a good idea.
He jumped three stories onto a nearby roof. Happosai shot off down the
street, took a turning, dived through a window and popped out the other
side.
Mortise felt his eyes stop glowing. He snorted.
"Hmm... I'll have to make sure that little turd doesn't cause us any
problems."
He turned and headed back towards the dojo.
***********************************
Ranma scratched his chin. "So, what's the bad news?"
"It could be a lot worse. Five of ours dead, all told and not counting
Ranko. Two major injuries that'll take some time to heal up. 98 of theirs
dead and another 63 captured. Oh, and twelve defected to us. We got off
extremely lightly." Mi Soon cracked a grin at him. She had returned herself
to her youthful looks during the early stages of the cleanup, and now stood
around five nine tall with long blue hair and bearing a striking resemblance
to Shampoo.
Ranma nodded. "Yeah... I guess we got lucky bigstyle."
"Well, yes. The sheer amount of wolfsbane flying around stopped most people
shapeshifting which meant very few people got shredded. Most of the enemy
dead seem to be the work of yourself, Ryoga, Mortise and - surprise
surprise - your father. Oh, and Akira. None of the non-combatants were hurt
in the slightest - well, apart from Nabiki and she only suffered mild
injuries."
Ranma nodded. "Next time I see Cow Lone I'm gonna rip off her head an' shit
down her neck fer what she done ta Nabs. Though I guess I'm gonna have ta
beat Soun ta it - he is bigtime pissed."
Mi Soon snorted. "I think I'll have to teach Kou Loun a little lesson in
manners. Again. She can be such a handful..."
"Ya what?"
"Didn't I tell you? She's my daughter."
"Oh yeah..." He turned and started to leave. "I gotta check Shampoo's
alright - she's pretty cracked up what wiv gettin' shot up like that an' her
mate dyin'. I'll see ya later."
Mi Soon nodded. She turned and continued writing her diary.
***********************************
Mortise walked into the workshop. He glanced around.
Spotting who he had been looking for, he walked over and knelt down beside
her. "Ranko..."
The redhead glanced up from where she'd been bolting a couple of components
onto her bike. "Yeah?"
"You know what you were saying about your missing leg?"
"What likes?"
"You said it doesn't hurt any more."
Ranko nodded. "Yeah. Since my accident... every day. Every fucking day it
hurt. Nerve pain, right?" She paused then shrugged. "Ask Mum about my reform
school days. I was on coke for three years." She shrugged again.
"So why the hell didn't you tell anyone?"
Ranko heaved herself upright. She glared at him for several seconds.
"I did. Why the hell do you think I don't exactly like my mother? She told
me I should put up with it. Then when I found something that helped she
busted me."
"You what? Why the fuck didn't you tell ME? Or Ranma?"
"So what'd you have done about it? Or Ranma? I figure we found the only
available cure tonight. Whoopie do, at fucking last. My accident was six
fucking years ago, Mortise. And that damn leg hurt for six fucking years,
twenty four fucking seven. Three hundred and whatever days a year, as in
non-stop."
************************************
Ranma slouched into his bedroom.
"Hey, ya alright, Shampoo?"
She nodded. "Sort of... we bury dead tonight."
Ranma frowned. "Right... so, what's th' process o' an Amazon funeral?"
Shampoo blinked a couple of times then started to explain.
***********************************
Two hours later the extended Saotome-Tendo-Hibiki family and the collected
Amazons were standing in a clearing in the woods outside Tokyo; the same
area of woodland Kou Loun and her cronies had been camped in.
Ranma swept his eyes round the gathered Amazons then glanced back at
Shampoo.
"Ya alright?"
"Sort of."
Mi Soon gestured for silence.
"My friends, we are gathered here today to remember the passing of five of
our finest young warriors. First and finest among their number was Sang
Tsu."
Ranma listened quietly as varied Amazons praised the deceased Sang Tsu.
Someone he had never known, gone just like that. He felt sick. She was a
pretty woman now the bloodstains from where she had been ripped in half were
cleaned away. So were the other three.
The last dead Amazon was Wu Chii.
He waited while Tiger and Shampoo said their pieces then stepped forwards
himself.
"Shampoo tells me it's traditional fer men ta not say anythin' durin' an
Amazon funeral. But ta hell with that, I got stuff I gotta say."
He turned, looked at where the five corpses lay on the stacked logs of a
funeral pyre and gestured towards the dead Amazons.
"I wanna thank all o' ya folks, especially this five. It's really too late
ta thank 憩m, but I gotta. If it wasn't fer ya folks a whole bunch o' people
I care about would be dead or Cow Lone's captives. It hurts, seein' those
girls dead. It hurts real bad, right here where there ain't no technique
gonna block it. But we gotta go on, there ain't no way I'm gonna let 憩m
have died fer nothin'. I owe ya. I owe all o' ya a helluva lot. More than
any guy should haveta owe ta anyone. I know it ain't much consolation ta you
folks who lost friends or family, but I'll do my damnedest ta pay off that
debt. Any o' ya. Any o' ya need somethin' I can help wiv, ya just ask."
He turned away from the pyre, gritting his teeth.
"I feel like it wuz my fault that they died."
Tiger stepped forwards again. She watched Ranma as he walked back towards
the crowd.
"Saotome..."
"Call me Ranma, huh?"
"Thanks."
After everyone had finished praising the dead they lit the funeral pyres and
left.
************************************
Ranma glared at the freshly cleared up garden.
"Alright. Feels like party time ta me." He indicated the substantial pile of
beer Kasumi and Nodoko had gone and bought during the cleanup.
The party lasted until at least three in the morning - that being when
Ranma, Akane and Shampoo went to bed. Ranko clearly remembered discovering
that drunk werewolf blood got her pissed but never had any recollection of
the events that followed. Nabiki fished her camera out, resulting in a roll
of pictures of incredibly drunk Amazons. Kasumi, along with about a dozen
others, managed to smoke four kilos of dope before passing out face down on
the kitchen table. Soun and Genma got very pissed very fast and spent most
of the night playing the most bizarre game of almost shogi anyone had ever
come across, only for an equally pissed Nodoko to interrupt them and start
trying to get how to go invisible out of Genma. Notable events of the night
included Ryoga vomiting in Mi Soon's lap then passing out on the toilet,
Nabiki passing out from Smirnoff overload and getting one eyebrow shaved off
and Mao Xing getting in a drunken brawl with John Kirth who was too pissed
to defend himself.
************************************
Ranma stared at the ceiling for several seconds after he woke up.
Akane glanced at him from his left. "Morning."
"Did we really fuck on the dinin' table last night?"
"Uh... I think so."
Shampoo grunted and opened her eyes. "Wazzup?"
"Fuckin' hell, it's half past fuckin' eleven." Ranma slid over her and
started pulling his leathers on. "Weird - I should have a minger o' a
headache after that."
Shampoo grunted again and followed him out of bed, grabbing her underwear.
She had always slept naked and had seen no reason to change this, much to
Ranma's embarrassment. "I no have hangover too..."
Akane sighed. "I wonder when I'm going to start shapeshifting."
"Sooner or later. We ain't gonna know until ya start goin' woof when ya try
ta say hello. At least that's as far as I've figured out. Hell, chances are
that Nabiki an' Kasumi are gonna start first."
The trio of youths slouched downstairs. Soun was sitting and reading a
newspaper. Nabiki was nowhere in sight. Ryoga was curled up on an old
mattress, looking very like a cat dozing in front of a fire. Ranko was
through in the kitchen helping Kasumi. Genma was sitting holding a beercan
with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Mortise was there, leaning on the
kitchen doorframe and chatting with Ranko. He glanced round and grinned
toothily at Ranma.
"Morning, man."
"Hey, Mortise! How's tricks?"
The vampire boy stretched, causing a string of pops and cracks. "Typical
crap night. I really miss sleeping... that and not having to worry about
undead politics."
"Undead politics?"
"Yeah, the local Top Leech has been giving me trouble."
Ranma sniggered. "Reckon he can handle gettin' a couple o' hundred pissed
off Chinese Amazon Werewolves with Big Fuck Off Guns upside th' head?"
"Ranma, you don't need to fight my fights for me. I can handle that decaying
bastard easily."
"Mortise, yer a friend. I happen ta like helpin' people - especially
friends."
Mortise nodded. "I'll ask if I need help."
"Ya don't hesitate ta, man. We need ya around - yer th' one guy I trust not
ta spew fuckin' bullshit if I ask fer info about all this supernatural
crap."
Mortise smiled. "Thanks... I think."
"I done a lotta things I shouldn't, man. But one thing I ain't ever done is
let down a friend. An' I ain't gonna start."
Akane rolled her eyes. "I thought you didn't care about honour."
"I don't care what society sez is th' right thing ta do. I care about what I
think's th' right thing ta do. It ain't about honour, it's about havin'
ethics. If I see some fucker do somethin' that means they deserve a kickin'
then I'm gonna give 憩m one. If I see shit I don't like I'm gonna get
involved. If I see someone gettin' fucked over - well, I happen ta like
helpin' people. I'm not an honourable man but I do have fuckin' standards
an' I do know right from wrong."
Everyone nodded thoughtfully. Ranma sighed and grabbed the weetabix.
"Ahh, food! Man I'm starvin'..."
Akane snorted. "Not surprising, you puked at least four times last night."
"Yeah? I remember chuckin' twice an' you chuckin' up five times."
Akane made a face. "Don't remind me..."
"At least it's a Saturday, we won't hafta go ta fuckin' school. Talkin' o'
school reminds me..." He grabbed Genma's beer and stuffed the can down the
back of the older man's leather jacket. "When're ya gonna teach me that move
ya used ta cut that spider thing in half, Dad? An' that goin' invisible
stunt ya used?"
Genma yelped and retrieved his beer. "Ranma! Those are secret techniques!"
"An' yer point is? I could use that shit."
Genma paused. "Son, I'll teach you the Kijin Raishuu-Dan, that's the vacuum
blade attack. But remember, that move is not to be used on living creatures
under any but the most utterly dire circumstances. No way in hell am I
teaching you the Umisenken."
Ranma grabbed a beercan off the table. He opened it then emptied it over
Genma's head.
"GROWF!"
"Dad ya fuckwit! Enough with th' secrets an' shit, I ain't gonna go teachin'
just anyone it. C'mon, we've trusted each other with our lives fer years!"
Ranko idly tossed a batch of hot water over their father, who continued
waving his hands around and risking spilling his beer. "No, no, no, no!"
"If ya don't watch it I'm gonna start callin' ya a dickhead again, Dad."
Genma put his beer down and discarded the sodden cigarette. "Ranma, those
techniques are *lethal*. Half of them were designed able to kill an Amerai
with one move. And I mean literally one move. I sealed them away around nine
years ago."
"That's not th' point, Dad. I figure Cow Lone's gonna be back an' who knows
what shit Akira's plannin'? What about this 荊op leech' dick Mortise said
about? Who's gonna stop him if he decides ta go after Ranko? We *need*
powerful attacks. Ya got powerful attacks, ergo yer gonna teach me 憩m."
Genma stared at the table for several seconds.
"Alright, Ranma. You win."
"Dad... thanks. I knew you'd come round ta my point o' view."
Genma glared at him. "Cheeky brat."
"Right back atcha, panda-boy... Hey, how come yer curse still works?"
Genma blinked several times then palmed his forehead.
"D'OH! I clean forgot! Since you've Firsted I can get rid of this!"
He pulled a silver pendant out of the front of his shirt, unclasped it's
chain and tossed it onto the table.
"So what's th' toby, Dad?"
"Ah... a small magic artifact contrived by John Kirth. When I wear it my
Jusenkyu curse is fully active as long as I don't shift to Battle or Ursine
form."
"Sneaky."
"Somewhat. We weren't expecting any of you kids to find out until you
actually shapeshifted... which isn't what happened." He smirked. "That's the
first of Akira's orders you royally screwed up, Ranma."
"Aw, c'mon. Let's get goin' with this trainin'."
"Enough with the evil grin, Ranma."
Ryoga uncurled and sat up. "Training? Secret techniques? Where's my share?"
"Fuckin' mousie ran away wiv it."
"Then I'm just gonna have to catch the little bugger. Dad, count me in."
Genma groaned then nodded. "Okay, okay, okay. Come on, you two. Let's get
out to the training hall."
************************************
Ranma slumped back on the bed.
"Whaaaaaaaaaaark. Whatta day... That wuz cool!"
Akane shot him a doubtful look. "Yawhat?"
"Aw, don't worry. I'll teach ya this stuff when yer gotten good enough,
right?"
"Bleah."
Shampoo shoved her hand down the front of Ranma's boxers.
"Maybe we do what you and Akane do last night, huh?"
"Hold up, I've still got me gunbelt on."
************************************
Nabiki stared into the gathering darkness, trying to ignore her missing
eyebrow and the suggestive noises coming from the other bedroom.
The moon was full. Full moon madness, huh? It sounded like Ranma, Akane and
Shampoo had that down pat. She scratched her head for a while, wondering
what to do about her glaring lack of combat ability.
"That's it."
She picked up her mobile phone.
"Look out, world. Nabiki Tendo is back on form..."
************************************
Mu Tze sat and silently glared out of the back of the stolen 40 foot artic.
The twenty odd Conservative Amazons who were sharing it with him followed
suit.
One of them offered him a pack of cigarettes. He silently accepted the
offer.
Halfway through his smoke one of the women broke the silence.
"Well, waddya know?"
"Those Clanners were sure tougher than I expected."
Mu Tze snorted. "I get the feeling Ranma Saotome equals trouble."
"Who the hell was that woman who cut Elder Kou Loun's arm off?"
"Ranma Saotome's fucking mother. Demon hunter from the Moroboshi clan."
"Ah. Big trouble then. Figure there's some infighting with them Saotome's -
didn't you see, she went for Akira Saotome."
"No shit Sherlock. I spent a few days with that bunch, remember? Most of
that lot hate Akira's guts. Apparently he's messed most of them around at
least once."
"I don't really give a shit about their internal politics. I'm going to
watch that Ranma Saotome character spew his guts if it's the last thing I
do. Next time, we think before we attack. Why didn't anyone scout them out
before we went ahead with the attack? Talk about fucking suicide."
"None of you geniuses had any idea how much firepower those fuckers have."
"So how come you didn't let us know, you pillock?"
"That's not my job. I'm an Amazon male, remember? I'm supposed to leave
fighting and spying to you lot, remember? And besides, I didn't know which
side I was on at that stage."
"So why should we trust you?"
"Because I haven't got a choice any more. I kidnapped his sister-in-law,
remember? From what I heard he thinks very highly of her. That means he's
probably planning to kill me. Ergo I am not on that rat bastard's side."
"Fuckhead."
Mu Tze shrugged. "Yeah well, I don't exactly worship you either."
************************************
Matsui climbed out of his car and slammed the door. He tucked his folder
under his arm and waddled over towards the school. The snarl of motorbike
engines and the scream of a jet announced Ranma and company arriving as he
walked through the front door.
He glanced over his shoulder. No less than six bikes, followed by four old
Chinese army trucks and Kasumi's Corvette.
Matsui chuckled. Ranma had obviously been up to more weirdness.
***********************************
Ranma casually stretched, producing a string of clicks and pops. He fished a
cigarette out of his pocket then turned to scan the schoolyard.
The mob of Amazon teenagers were warily examining the place. Nabiki was
climbing out of Kasumi's car, looking slightly seasick.
He lit up then spotted the Gosunkugi brothers entering the schoolyard.
Hikaru immediately headed over to join Ranma's gang.
"Yo, man. How's tricks?"
Hikaru snorted. "Shit as usual... Hey, did you hear about that gun battle
Friday night? I heard-"
"Dude, take a close look at my leathers. These things are kevlar lined,
they'll deflect anything up to and including a 7.62 assault rifle bullet."
Hikaru looked confused then spotted the bullet scars. He let out a startled
squawk when Ranma flipped the hem of his jacket aside revealing his GP35.
"We wuz one side o' that gun battle, man. Five o' our friends gotten killed
Friday night."
"What?"
"Yeah. War ain't fun."
"But... I heard there was miniguns and stuff going off! Someone blew up a
house!"
Akane snorted. "That was a spider tank. I'll show you the wrecks if you
like. Hell, about six houses got trashed. The bazooka you might have heard
about is mine."
"Er... I guess you won, right?"
Ranma nodded. "Yeah. The bad guys lost over 160 people."
"What? How?"
"90 - odd dead, sixty or so captured an' twelve switched sides." He jerked
his thumb at Shampoo. "She caught a few 25mm slugs in the crotch. Mao Xing
there - Shampoo's brother - well, ya really gotta see what his bike does.
Ranko got shot up real bad. Mum nearly done th' bad guy's boss in. Nabs got
kidnapped but her dad got her back no bother."
Hikaru blinked a few times. "Er, how come Ranko and Shampoo are still moving
if they got shot up?"
"Hey, Ranko - ya wanna tell him?"
Ranko nodded. "Yeah. Gos, I'm a vampire."
"An' we're werewolves. Well, Dad's a werebear an' we don't know what sorta
beasties Akane, Ryoga an' Nabs are gonna turn inta. I'm guessin' yer human,
right?"
"Like, what makes you think I'm gonna believe-"
Ranko turned round and looked him straight in the eye. She burnt a little ki
and opened her mouth.
Hikaru Gosunkugi blinked. Ranko's eyes were glowing red and her canines had
just extended into three inch fangs.
"Er... forget I asked that."
"Cool, cool."
Ranma sounded somewhat deeper. Hikaru looked round then up.
Nine foot of wolfman grinned down at him then shrugged expressively. Akane
slapped Ranma's (furry) arse.
"Showoff."
Ranma snorted and returned to human form. "Yep. So, ya still want ta be
mates wiv us, Gos?"
Hikaru blinked a few times.
"Hell yeah!"
"Hey, Nabs! I just remembered - ya know how ya were talkin' about wantin' me
ta train ya? Ya still up fer it?"
Nabiki ambled over. "Yes. So, when do we start, Sensei?"
"Soon as we get home. An' don't call me that, I look fer Dad every time I
hear someone say that."
"Hey, chill out, bro. I was just trying to be polite."
"Appreciated but ya don't need ta. I like ya an' I gotten a lotta respect
fer ya. Ya know that, don't ya?"
"Yup." Nabiki paused then glanced at her watch. "Ranma, could we have a word
in private? We've got ten minutes before school starts."
"Sure. C'mon, we'll head round th' back o' th' gym hall."
They walked to said place, where Ranma casually leant against the wall.
"So, what's botherin' ya?"
"You knew about that bug I put in your jacket before your trip to China. I
figured it out last night."
Ranma nodded. "Yup. I know what a bug looks like. And?"
"Why don't you mind?"
"Because I trust ya. Ya wouldn't plant bugs unless ya had a damn good
reason. I like th' idea o' ya knowin' what's happenin'. Ya got a good head
on yer shoulders, Nabs. I figured if things went wrong ya'd be able ta sort
it out. Look, I got a bit o' a confession ta make - me an' Ryoga lifted a
shitload o' data off yer laptop a while back. I figured with th' contacts ya
got - well, ya needed ta know what wuz goin' on so ya could pull our asses
outta th' fire if everythin' went ta hell. I like, trust an' respect ya,
Nabs. Get used ta it 慶os I ain't gonna stop."
"Damnit, Ranma. I wish I hadn't let my little sister get you."
Ranma sniggered. "Aw, don't ya worry, Nabs. There's gonna be a guy fer ya
sooner or later. An' yer part o' my family, yer my sister. C'mon, let's
head."
***********************************
Tatewaki Kuno looked up with some interest on his face as Nabiki walked
briskly into the classroom.
"Good morning, Nabiki Tendo."
"Morning, Kuno. How's tricks?"
Kuno snorted. "Just the usual. Say, you are beginning to pick up vocal
habits from your brother-in-law."
"Am I? I hadn't noticed... So, anything unusual been happening in the House
of Kuno? How's Kodachi?"
"Shaken. What in the world occurred on Friday night? She refused to speak of
it to me, which is most unusual."
"Oh, we had a spot of bother with a bunch of Chinese werewolves. Guess what,
they were after Ranma. I think you can figure the result."
"A battle, correct?"
"Score one for the Blue Thunder."
"Nabiki, you know I have given up on that - er - 系ame'."
"And you know I'm pulling your leg."
"So that was what the gunfire I overheard was all about. Ranma Saotome
versus the world, huh?"
"The Saotome-Tendo-Hibiki family and friends versus a psychotic old Chinese
hag and assorted lackeys, actually. Kodachi got involved when she found my
sister having a shooting match with a dozen or so enemies. She insisted on
staying to help... she's a damn good shot. Especially considering she has to
do everything one handed."
Kuno blinked. "Where in the world did she get her hands on a gun? My
twelve-bore was definitely in the-"
"That, Kuno, is classified information. I am not at liberty to discuss it
with anyone not cleared for it, and that includes you."
"Huh?"
"We - as in the extended Saotome-Tendo-Hibiki family - are working for the
government, Kuno. Special forces, in fact."
Kuno blinked. A lot.
***********************************
"An' what th' fuck d'ya think yer playin' at?"
Kato Gosunkugi froze then looked up from his meddling with Ranma's bike. The
youth in question was standing glaring at him.
Ranma pulled his GP35 out of his pocket.
"Now, yer gonna fuck off outta here an' never so much as touch my bike again
if ya know what's good fer ya. Unless ya really want me ta blow yer fuckin'
head clean off."
Kato stood up and backed away. "What the hell?"
"Yeah, it's a gun. A real live Brownin' GP35. Fully loaded ta boot." He
whipped out the Special Forces identity card Nabiki and Honda had given him
the evening before and shoved it into Kato's face.
"You're with the army? But you're only like, seventeen!"
"An'? Big deal. I'm capable of knockin' tank turrets off wiv me bare hands.
I'm a werewolf, slugboy. Fuck with me again and yer gonna get wasted."
Kato hurriedly backed away. Ranma shook his head, pocketed his gun and ID
and turned to his bike.
He muttered a few obscenities. "Ya fuckin' psychotic bastard! Undoin' th'
nut on th' rear shock? Fer fuck sake, ya were tryin' ta get me killed? So
what th' fuck did I do so wrong? Yer th' one who came in here an' started
swearin' at my wife. Hey, Hikaru - mind if I smash yer brother's face in?"
"Go ahead, I don't give a shit."
"Aw fuck - he legged it."
"Hey, you know how you were talking about teaching Nabiki martial arts? Like
a second class member?"
"Ya wanna be able ta kick that fuckhead's ass, right?"
"And my father."
"No prob. Jump in onea th' trucks."
Ranma, having finished replacing the nut, swung onto his bike and glanced
around.
"Alright, people! Let's get th' fuck outta here!"
Nabiki swung onto the back of Akane's bike.
"Hey! Get off, you haven't got a lid!"
"Blow it, Akane. The Amazon's trucks are *full* and no way in hell do I get
yet another ride in Kasumi's car this *year*. You're giving me a lift and
that is final."
Akane blinked. She looked at the Amazon's vehicles - sure enough, they were
heavily loaded. And Nabiki did have a point about Kasumi's driving
technique.
"Oh, alright then."
The CB roared into life as Akane's foot shoved the kickstart down. The twin
headlamps came on as the engine caught, first letting out a rough clatter of
firings then settling to a steady growl.
Akane grinned as she pulled the clutch in. This... this was what it was all
about.
She nudged the gearshift down into first, the box producing a solid chunk.
The turbo was audibly starting to build up boost pressure, a slight hiss
mixed into the rattle from the bike's exhaust.
Nabiki wrapped her arms around her pregnant little sister. She felt safer
here than she had all day.
Over on the huge black Gixer Ranma pumped his fist into the air, signalling
their departure. The six bikes peeled out of the schoolyard in a loose
formation.
Akane noticed that Ranma seemed to be setting a slower pace than usual. She
smirked and gassed her bike hard. The turbo kicked in, thrusting the stud
encrusted Superdream forwards at a rapidly increasing rate.
Ranma rolled his eyes and snapped the GSXR's throttle to the endstop. It's
front wheel jumped off the ground as the rear wheel lost traction and
started spinning, a fine jet of blue smoke shooting from under it.
Shampoo crouched low over her bike's fuel tank and opened the throttle. The
bike started to accelerate, lifting it's front wheel an inch or so into the
air then the turbo kicked in and it shot up into her trademark monster
wheelie.
Ranko reacted next; she slammed her HD down a gear and gave it a healthy
handful. The big old V-twin let out a bellowing roar and lifted the front
end smoothly off the deck.
Ryoga thumbed on the afterburners.
Mao Xing smirked. He cracked his mecha bike's throttle wide open - it was
unusual in that the twistgrip was on the left handlebar - while
downshifting. His bike reared up into a wheelie as massive as Shampoo's, the
front wheel pointing skywards. Two jets of blue flame shot from it's
exhausts. The engine - being a fusion turbine - produced a doppler howl
quite unlike the jet-scream from Ryoga's bike or the bellow from the piston
engined machines. It sounded more like the scream of a passing TIE fighter.
The pack of bikes shot onto Nerima's high street at around 124 MPH.
It was at that point that a Metro turned out of a sidestreet six feet in
front of Akane's bike.
The wildly speeding CB hit the car square in the bonnet, launching both
riders in a parabola as it's rear end flipped up. The bike's forks and front
wheel exploded. One of Akane's six - guns flew out of her pocket. The bike's
frame ripped the car's wheel in half then hit the engine and stove in it's
No. 1 piston. Ranma laid his Gixer over and dodged the wrecks, his brakes on
hard enough to lock the rear wheel. Shampoo somehow managed to ramp her
wheelieing bike over the wreckage as Akane's bike cartwheeled clean over the
trashed car.
Akane came down on her back some sixty feet on. Ranma had fitted a back
protector to her trenchcoat and she was wearing a kevlar flak jacket under
it; she slid some distance before smacking her helmeted head into a parked
car. She staggered to her feet.
Nabiki, who was dressed in her school uniform, wasn't so lucky. Having been
further back on the bike she was thrown further when it bucked; she landed
on the car Akane slid into, bashing it's roof in some six inches and
smashing it's windscreen with her feet before cartwheeling off the car and
coming to a rest in a giftshop's window display, having headbutted her way
through the window.
Mao Xing's bike piled into the wreck. Being armoured it had substantially
more luck than Akane's ride; it smashed into the car like an express train,
lifting itself off the ground and flipping the car onto it's side,
incidentally demolishing a pair of wheelie bins. Mao rammed his thumb on the
transformation trigger and fired his retro-boosters. The powersuit slid six
feet on it's knees, boiling jets of raw plasma issuing from the braking
ducts.
Finally Ryoga skidded to a halt beside Ranma.
"Oh. Shit."
Akane recovered her .44 Magnum and staggered over to what was left of her
bike. Ryoga dropped her jetbike onto it's sidestand and dashed over to where
Nabiki had landed. Ranma sprinted after her. Mao straightened up and
followed them. Shampoo sat and stared on her bike. Ranko rode after her
brother and sister.
"NABIKI!"
The middle Tendo girl was lying in the centre of a swath of shattered glass,
broken shelves, her own blood and scattered goods. She was still moving.
"NABS! STAY WHERE YA ARE!"
"Shit, shit, shit! Someone phone Doctor Tofu!"
Ranma suddenly skidded to a halt.
"We won't need ta do that." He pulled out his handgun. "She's Firstin'."
The Amazon trucks that had been following them skidded to a halt. Varied
Amazons leapt out. They assumed the worst and brought their guns.
Nabiki opened her eyes. She let out a low moan.
"Nabs? Are ya in there?"
"R...Ranma?"
Ranma shapeshifted as he walked over to her.
"Yeah, it's me."
"Ranma... what's going on?"
"Looks like ya just learnt ta shapeshift."
"I feel really weird..." Nabiki remarked, completely failing to get what he
was talking about. "And my head hurts, but I dunno why."
"Guess yer head hurts because ya just headbutted through a plate glass
window wiv it. An yer feelin' weird 慶ause yer a fuckin' near ten foot tall
catwoman. Okay, people, enough wiv th' gawpin' - let's get outta here. Ya
lot - load what's left o' Akane's bike onta onea th' trucks. Shampoo,
gissahand wiv Nabs since ya regenerate any cuts. C'mon - let's move it!"
***********************************
Akira went bugeyed. "WHAT happened?!?!"
"I already told ya, dickwad."
"Hang on, hang on, hang on. How many people saw this? Any security cameras?"
"Ya weren't worried about that when me an' Shampoo went, so why now?"
"You and Xian Pu didn't First in the fucking high street during rush hour!
You went in front of the house late evening. Shampoo went mid afternoon in
an almost deserted backstreet. Nabiki? In the middle of a horde of
witnesses! And probably on fucking camera!"
"Kiss my ass, shit-for-brains. We just had a ragin' firefight in th' middle
o' town if ya forgot."
"A raging firefight that the armed forces have agreed to ignore. Not
something that will bring fucking demon hunters down on our heads!"
"Kiss my fuckin' ass! I ain't scared of demon hunters - not wiv a few
hundred trigger-happy Amazons an' th' best fuckin' demon hunter in th'
country on our side! Or have ya forgotten who my mum is?"
"You don't know what I know about those scum!"
Ranma jammed his gun into Akira's face.
"What are ya callin' Mum?"
"FOR FUCK SAKE! Get that damn thing out of my face before I rip you in two!"
"Big words, fuckwit. How about if I let Mum skewer ya?"
"LOOK HERE! The five Hunter Guilds all know our weakness. Wolfsbane, Ranma."
"An'? What's that gonna do when I rip their fuckin' heads off? Or stuff a
..44 Magnum down their fuckin' throats an' pull th' trigger? Yer forgettin'
who yer talkin' to. Ranma Saotome, hardest damn fucker on th' planet,
remember?"
Nodoko looked up from the newspaper she was reading. "Some of the Guild
types are pretty good, Ranma. They don't hesitate to fight dirty, set
ambushes and so forth. I'll see what I can do to at least keep the Guilds I
have contacts with off your back... but that's only three out of seven
Guilds."
Nabiki smirked slightly as she stepped out of the kitchen where she had been
talking to Kasumi. "I'll speak to Honda. He'll be able to clamp down on the
details. Some sort of coverup would probably be a wise move. After all, a
videotape of me shapeshifting would act as a quite effective 茎hoot me'
sign. Oh, and I think I'll have a natter with my own Guild contacts. I know
several of the most respected demon hunters in Japan. They work closely with
Honda's boys and he'll be able to give us a clean bill of safety with them."
She smirked again, directing it at Akira. "There is after all more than one
way to skin a cat."
Akira shot upright.
"How dare you show your-"
He stopped, suddenly aware of the sheer quantity of firearms now levelled at
his forehead.
Ranma rolled his eyes.
"Ya really are a stupid piece of shit, Akira. Firstly, why th' fuck does
bein' chucked through a window causin' First Change strike ya as a crime?
Secondly, how th' fuck d'ya manage ta be thick enough ta *still* think ya
can get away wiv talkin' ta my sister like that?"
Nabiki smirked again. "I think I can defend myself, Ranma. Mister Akira, I
point blank refuse to take any of your bullshit. According to what I've been
told, the Tendo family are technically a Clan separate from your own.
Therefore Daddy, as head of our family, is the only person capable of
calling myself and Kasumi to task. Akane is an unusual case - she is both
the champion of our family and wed to the future Lord Packmaster of your own
clan. Therefore whose jurisdiction she falls under depends whose turf she is
on. Correct? Now, as this is the residence of the head of the Tendo clan,
meaning I somehow suspect this is Tendo territory, I believe you can go to
hell."
Akira frowned. She had a point.
"Very well. I'll speak to Tendo. Don't think your ass is out of the fire
yet..."
"Fuckmonkey, if ya get her in trouble because some myopic shit sent her an'
Akane fer an amateur flyin' lesson then screw th' consequences, I'm gonna
blast ya somewhere ya can't regenerate it. I mean, sure, we were speedin'.
But that dickhead popped out six foot in front o' Akane." Ranma turned and
jabbed a finger at Nabiki. "An' you! I know as well as ya do ya can ride a
bike. What th' fuck'd ya think ya were playin' at, not wearin' a lid? Akane,
why th' fuck didn't ya refuse? Nabiki, yer gettin' wheels. I gotten enough
spare parts ta put together a bike for ya. Go get yerself leathers an' a
lid, Dad's gotten gear in stock that should fit ya. That's th' last fuckin'
time ya play that stunt if I got anythin' ta do wiv it! Come on - we're
headin' fer th' workshop."
Akira looked confused. "I thought you said-"
"Dickwad. It ain't either o' 憩m茎 fault they crashed. It IS both o' 憩m's
fault Nabiki wuz dressed in a fuckin' school uniform an' no lid!"
Ranma slammed the door in Akira's face.
***********************************
It was a very subdued Nabiki Tendo who sat and stared at Ranma's back as he
fastened the new set of forks to the straightened frame of Akane's bike.
After finishing yelling at Akira he had frogmarched her into the workshop.
Genma had taken one look at his son and hurriedly left the building.
Ranma, Mao Xing, Ranko, Mortise and Ryoga were working on two projects at
once.
Mending Akane's bike and building a new machine. Like the bikes Ranma had
given Akane and Shampoo it was a CB500 engine in a CB250 frame.
Nabiki just sat quietly in her new leathers and watched. It took her nearly
half an hour to pluck up the courage to speak.
"Ranma..."
"Ya?"
"Um... any idea why I didn't frenzy?"
Ranma shrugged. "Guess yer part of th' 0.1 percent o' Amerai who don't when
they First. Ask Mi Soon."
Mortise glanced up from where he had just finished bolting the head onto the
CB500 engine.
"I have a different theory. 99.9 percent of teenage Amerai don't know what's
going to happen to them. You hadn't had time for it to really sink in.
Nabiki, how long have you known what species you are?"
"About seven or eight weeks."
"There you go. You were fully expecting to First Change and soon, correct?
In Ranma's case - well, it was just under a week after he knew what was
going to happen. I'm guessing he half didn't believe it. Am I right?"
Ranma nodded. "It was like, yaright. What's th' chances o' me an' both th'
girls bein' werewolves... more fool me."
"There you go. Now, Shampoo had no idea what was going to happen. It went
off in her face with absolutely no warning... lucky Ranma was there with a
gun full of Wolfsbane slugs. It's partially my fault - I should have told
you immediately instead of respecting the idiocy all the Clan Diva offshoots
call a tradition."
"Don't blame yerself, Mortise. Shit has a habit o' happenin'."
"I know, I know. But sometimes one has a chance of preventing it."
"Th' benefit o' hindsight. Ya finished wiv that wrench?"
Mortise nodded and tossed him the spanner.
Nabiki frowned. "Any idea how come I'm a werecat? Dad's a werewolf. From the
way Mum died I'd guess she was human."
"How'd yer mum go?"
Nabiki closed her eyes for a moment. "She was stabbed to death by a
burglar."
"Aw, shit..."
"She did manage to kill him before she drowned. Punctured lung... she
drowned on her own blood. After cutting him in half with a sashami knife."
"Musta been one tough lady."
Nabiki sighed. "Where do you think Akane got it from? Sure wasn't Dad."
Kasumi looked up from where she was adjusting her car's carbs. "You didn't
like, see how Dad went when we figured you'd been like, kidnapped. He went
like he was before Mum died."
"I was seven when Mum died, remember? From seven to nearly eighteen is a
hell of a long time."
"Hey, when's yer birthday, Nabs?"
"Just over six weeks. Twelfth of October."
Ranma nodded. "Gotcha."
Kasumi giggled. "It's like, funny how our birthdays are all like, within a
month of each other. Maybe there was something in the like, air during like,
January."
"Yer twenty in October, right?"|
"Second of like, November, man. Akane's the fifth of October."
"We've got completely sidetracked. Anyone got any clues why I'm a werecat?"
Mortise snorted. "It's really very simple. Nine out of ten Amerai born as
humans turn out to be werewolves. You're part of the other one in ten. It
seems to be pretty random. If you procreated with another tiger then the
result would be born as a tiger, First Change at around eighteen months.
With a human or another Amerai you'd probably end up giving birth to a
werewolf, unless the other Amerai was also a weretiger in which case it
would rise to a 50-50 chance of getting a weretiger. Confused yet? Let me
tell you, Amerai genetics is the most utterly *fucked* subject I've ever
come across. You people have at least sixteen sets of DNA. One set defines
your natural forms. With training you can learn to modify these forms. The
other sets seem to give rise to the possibility of producing other types of
shapeshifter. Thus Genma and Nodoko producing what will probably turn out to
be werewolves. Oh, by the way, Ranko - you aren't off the First Change hook.
Vampirised Amerai keep their powers of shapeshifting, even if if they
haven't First Changed yet. This gives you what has to be one of the toughest
hyperimmune systems ever to exist. Oh, and believe it or not you can
reproduce fairly normally. Amerai reproductive systems are *incredibly*
tough. They need to be so a pregnancy can survive what Amerai are 恵uilt'
for - combat. A human woman's reproductive system does not survive the
transformation to vampiric form. A female werewolf's does."
Ranma glanced up. "What about yer nuts?"
"Them? They work. I don't know, maybe vampirism is sexist. It'd be my guess
that whoever created the original vampires was male and didn't like the idea
of sterilising guys. You know how much shame is connected to being
impotent."
Ranko scratched her head. "What do you mean, 掲airly normally'?"
"Fairly normally in that you can get pregnant and carry a child to term. I
do know such a child will mature normally, but whether you'll end up
producing a straight vampire, a straight werecreature or a cross is anyone's
guess. An Amerai woman's reproductive system is the last thing to go if she
dies. Hell, it's been known for a several weeks beheaded corpse to give
birth."
"Gross."
"Yes. Very. Akira found that out the hard way when he had his mother
executed. Two weeks later out popped Mi Soon."
"So how the fuckd'ya find that 蛍n out?"
"Red Hanovan. It's amazing what gems of information someone who's over five
thousand years old remembers."
"Let me get this straight. Mi Soon's mum had been dead for two weeks when
she gave birth to Mi Soon?"
"Yup. Longest ever known was one month, six days and around eighteen hours."
Ranko stood up.
"Mortise, next time I want to know gross facts I'll let you know, OK?"
And another one bites the dust!
NOTES
Next - more trouble, more Happosai and guess which bike wrecker's back?
Now, I must once again publicly thank/attempt to embarrass two people (ya,
this is copy-paste from a whole rake of other chapters...)
Firstly, thanks must go to my wonderful pre reader Paula Gray. Thankyou,
Paula. Your suggestions have been a great help since I am shite at plotting
battle scenes.
Biker 1/2 has been given a home on the web! Go to
http://www.kistunesden.com
to find the archive; it's in the 敬osted' section of the site (in fact last
time I looked it *was* the Hosted section!)
Thanks must go to the lovely Carrie for her good work HTMLising Biker 1/2
and setting up the web page; she requested my permission to host the fic.
This request was gratefully received since I know nothing about HTML...
Thankyou, Carrie. Without you Biker 1/2 would have probably been relegated
to the bottom of the TASS archive for years.
Finally, I've been told I misspelled two names in Biker 1/2 - Nodoko (should
be Nodoka) and Jusenkyu (should be Jusenkyo). All I can say is D'OH! I'll
stick with the spellings I've used previously for future chapters of this
fic; other fics will contain the correct spelling. Eh - oops. My dyslexia
shows once again - man I love spellcheckers, but why couldn't Apple make the
AppleWorks spell checker understand Ranma 1/2 terms? Whine whine.
I plan to compile Book 1 when I finish it and post the compilation as one
fic; I will correct aforesaid names when I do so.
Please send any C&C to dog...@ratbike.org - my phone line is down once more
thus I can only access the virgin.net email address once a week at most.
Thanks.
Calum.
I am hereforth putting character descriptions at the end of each episode,
hopefully eventually forming a 詣ho's who' of Biker 1/2. This is an idea I
got from reading the fics of Greg Sharp (i pray i spelt it right)
Next up are Soun, Genma and Kou Loun!
SOUN TENDO
Introduced - Chapter 1 (In a World gone Bad)
Role - Leading lady's father and maniac depressive.
Species - Amerai.
Special powers / abilities - Despite spending most of his time on his ass,
Soun is one helluva martial artist. He can also shapeshift as easily as
breathing.
Motivation - To reunite his family line with Clan Saotome.
Appearance - Soun looks much like a thirtysomething Japanese man with
shoulder length black hair, a handsome square-jawed face and a bushy
moustache. He normally dresses in freshly pressed and laundered denim jeans
and a plain white T-shirt; unlike the Saotomes he only wears his leather
jacket when riding.
Beneath his casual exterior lies a well - honed athletic body and a sharp
mind.
Soun's were-forms are a large grey wolf and a nine foot humanoid version of
the same.
Personality at introduction - Akane's father and a widower, Soun shares
Akane's intellect. Unfortunately he suffered a nervous breakdown after the
death of his wife some eight years ago and remains a maniac depressive. He
is an extremely skilled martial arts tutor - the Tendo dojo was very
successful for some twenty years and the family are still living off Soun's
savings.
He and Genma trained together for several years and remain 恵ike buddies'
although Soun's old Yamaha chop is in bits in the attic.
GENMA SAOTOME
Introduced - Chapter 1 (In a World gone Bad)
Role - Leading man's father and all round big fat biker.
Species - Amerai
Special powers / abilities - Genma is A) a werebear, B) an incredibly
skilled martial artist and C) a professional motorbike mechanic.
Motivation - To prove himself to his children - and show that dick Akira
what he's capable of while he's about it.
Appearance - Genma looks like the stereotypical fatass biker. He weighs
twenty stone, has a bushy grey beard, is bald and wears either a black
leather biker jacket, Harley-Davidson T-shirt and jeans or (when he's
working) a blue boiler suit. During daytime he always has a set of
prescription mirrorshades seemingly glued to his face. He replaces these
with ordinary glasses in the evening.
His curse form is an absolutely enormous panda wearing those mirrorshades.
His were-form is a giant black bear, about twice the size of any 系ormal'
bear or a humanoid (and even bigger) version of the same. The mirrorshades
are still present on both forms.
Personality at introduction - Genma is downright miserable and starting to
hate Akira. He's been forced to do all sorts of stuff to his beloved son
Ranma, knows that this stuff is sure to cause the boy trouble, feels at
fault for Ranma's curse and basically hates his life. Returning to Nerima
(the place he grew up) is a massive relief, especially since Ranma seems to
be falling in love with the town.
He puts on a brave face but actually just wants to cry.
KOU LOUN (aka Cow Lone or Cowling)
Introduced - Chapter 11 (Pickled monkey or what?)
Role - Villainess.
Species - Amerai.
Special powers/abilities - Kou Loun is not only a werewolf, she's a walking
encyclopaedia of martial arts to boot.
Motivation - To get back at Ranma, Akira, Nodoko and anyone else who ever
pissed her off.
Appearance - Kou Loun is a withered and shrunken old hag, about three foot
tall with four feet of white hair. Or rather, she was until she got in
Nodoko's way. She is now once more a statuesque Amazon beauty, with a vague
familial resemblance to Akira Saotome and one missing arm.
Personality at introduction - Kou Loun is a definite 恵ad apple'. And she's
already spoilt the whole damn box. She is a vicious, scheming, manipulative
old bitch with a strong lust for revenge and absolutely no regard for other
people's opinions, feelings or wishes. She will do absolutely anything to
get her own way.
GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Ratbike - A motorbike made to look as fucked up and unroadworthy as possible
while still being street legal. Normally painted flat black.
Honda CG125 - Small single - cylinder 4-stroke road bike. Not very much of
anything but supremely reliable and dirt cheap. It's reliability stems from
having very little to go wrong and a low - revving 4-stroke engine.
Honda Fireblade - Insane Honda sportsbike. Mad but beginning to show it's
age.
Supercharger - A pump driven off the crank that forces more air into the
engine thus forcing it to run faster.
Nitrous oxide - Laughing gas. A petrol - nitrous mix burns faster than a
petrol - air mix therefore produces more horsepower and more wear in the
engine.
Top yoke - The yokes are two pieces of metal that hold the front forks
together and to the bike. The top yoke is the upper one. Known as triple
clamps in the US.
Gixer - Slang for a Suzuki GSXR (one of the craziest bikes built).
Chain lube - Motorbike chain lubrication oil.
Header tank - Tank that contains the spare water for the radiator on a
sealed cooling system as found in most cars.
Gasflowing - trimming off excess metal from inside the cylinder heads to aid
the burn rate of fuel within the engine. Gives a small horsepower boost.
Final drive - the drive chain that goes from the gearbox to the back wheel
and the cogs (final drive sprockets) that it runs on.
Conrod - The bit of metal that connects the piston to the crankshaft.
Alternator - Higher tech version of a generator.
Kill switch - The engine's 経ff' switch. Turns off power to the ignition.
Lid / skidlid - Slang for a crash helmet.
250 Superdream - CB250. The next up the Honda model range from the CG125 and
just a bigger version of the same.
500 Superdream - CB500. A CB250 with a bigger bore and heavier frame.
Engine clicking - An internal combustion engine heats up when run. Run it
hard and it heats up more, then when you switch off the engine will start
emitting a series of sharp clicks as the metal cools and contracts.
Stocker - unmodified factory - built vehicle.
Binned - crashed. Normally means written off.
Steering damper - a long, thin shock absorber that fits between the forks
and the frame. Helps steady the steering.
JSDF - Japanese Self Defence Force. The collective Japanese armed forces.
JGSDF - Japanese Ground Self Defence Force. The ground forces arm of the
Japanese military.
JASDF - Japanese Air Self Defence Force. The Japanese air force.
What likes - Slack Scottish grammar. Means something along the lines of
継lease could you explain that'. Only considerably less posh.
Toby - An Inverness Collegeism; slang meaning something along the lines of
widget, gizmo or thingy. Derived from angling parlarance (toby = a small
wooden fish used as a lure.) May be related to the epithet 卦oby Tishbein'
and can be said 卦obyracho' for no apparent reason. (I'm not making this up!
Honest!)