World's best book title!
James Kibo Parry
"Wet-Scrape Braintanned Buckskin"
Sadly, the book didn't live up to whatever I might have imagined it to be,
and I won't tell you what that was, you perverts.
I tried to write you folks a story about Spot trying to produce some
wet-scrape braintanned buckskin, but the idea sort of ran out of
momentum after the part where Spot took out his own brain to squish it
all over the buckskin, because after that Spot spent the rest of the
story enjoying Archie comics.
Then I tried to convert it into "Battlestar: Galactica" fan-fiction
all about wet-scrape braintanned Starbuckskin, but the story abruptly
ended when I stopped pretending to be writing it.
Finally, I tried to just turn the story into an educational adventure
of Archie and Jughead learning how to wet-scrape braintanned buckskin,
but the hide kept coming out bright orange with cross-hatching all over
it, so instead I invented a time machine and went back to the 1950s
and killed Archie to keep him from ever getting his own comic book.
My time machine is powered by wet-scrape braintanned dilithium, but
don't try to figure out what that is, because thinking about it will
give you a braintan.
-- K.
The book "Wet-Scrape Braintanned
Buckskin" has since been republished
under its new title,
"Mozilla Braintanned Firefox".
James Kibo Parry
>
> Seen today at a used-book store:
>
> "Wet-Scrape Braintanned Buckskin"
>
> Sadly, the book didn't live up to whatever I might have imagined it to be,
> and I won't tell you what that was, you perverts.
Because I'm posting from my small emergency backup computer, after
I sent that I checked to see if it had shown up on Google Groups,
and these possibly-contextually-appropriate ads were displayed
next to it:
-> Sponsored Links
->
-> Richie Rich Comics
-> Browse a huge selection now.
-> Find exactly what you want today.
-> www.ebay.com
->
-> Archie Comic Books
-> 100,000 Stores. Deals. Reviews.
-> Archie Comic Books & More!
-> Yahoo.com
->
-> The End is Upon us All
-> Prepare for it. Revelation reveals
-> how & when. Learn Bible prophecy
-> www.worldslastchance.com
Oh no! Because I said the secret word, "braintanned", Google
permitted me a glimpse at the secret that the Earth is doomed
to be destroyed unless I click on that Sponsored Linkvertisement
to learn the shocking truth from that Sponsored Linkganda and
its outpouring of informational Sponsored Linkzophreniac ranting!
The site presents a very artistic drawing of a young Tommy Lee Jones
and a not-dead-at-the-time-they-last-updated-their-site Pope John Paul II
having some sort of conference where Tommy Lee was trying to
convince the Pope that he was the President of the United States
and not some poorly-drawn actor who only bore a passing resemblance
to the President when drawn by someone who's not good at illustrating
crazy rants. (Next time, don't hire a sane illustrator!) President
Tommy Lee is talking into a Crazy Straw that disguised itself as
a microphone, while His Holiness is waiting for the right moment
to whack him with one of the two pieces of lumber he keeps stacked
in his lap. (Looks to be a one-by-six on top of a four-by-four,
bearing in mind that under the New World Order, a one-by-six will
technically be a one-by-six-point-six-six.)
=> To those who dare continue reading, World's Last Chance
=> may sound preposterous, if not reckless,
...but only if I read it aloud. I am careful not to move my lips
when I go out of my way to read wacko rants, unless I've first
ascertained that there are no heavily-armed air marshals on the
flight with me.
=> [...]
=>
=> By honoring, Sunday, originated by Satan through the papacy,
=> you are preparing to receive the mark of the beast.
And, it's a, comma! Sinners, re, pent!
I know all this information is true because the Web site has a
fancy masthead featuring an animation of a rotating Earth with
a rotating cube inside it. A cuuuuuuube! God's holy TimeCube
of squareness! And every several seconds, a cute little animated
lightning bolt blows up the whole masthead, except for the Earth,
which keeps rotating, with the six billion people on it blissfully
unaware that they live on a planet where the Atlantic Ocean is
only about ten miles wide and Australia has bunny ears. Also,
I think Thailand has testicular cancer.
If you need further proof that the incomprehensible non-sequiturs
on this Web site add up to a pattern of non-logic which is obviously
true, behold the irrefutable proof of two numbers being within only
a few dozen percent of each other:
=> 1. USA came to existence around 1798: [...]
I heard that nobody's told John Paul II yet that the Boston Tea Party
just happened, sometime around the eighteenth or nineteenth or
twentieth centuries. I sure hope someone tells him before he dies,
'cause it would be a shame if someone as important as the Antichrist
died and crazy people had to change the bad artwork on their Web sites.
=> THE BIBLE REVEALS NEXT AND LAST POPE WILL BE A DEVIL
=> IMPERSONATING JOHN PAUL II
Just 'cause Zombie John Paul II's going to blow up the Earth
sometime around 1998 doesn't mean that he'll be the last pope.
Can you prove there are no Popes on Mars?
-- K.
Beware the mark, of the beast,
the comma which, is a period
with, the devil's tail!
James Kibo Parry
this out:
>
> -> The End is Upon us All
> -> Prepare for it. Revelation reveals
> -> how & when. Learn Bible prophecy
> -> www.worldslastchance.com
I did a little digging, and turned up a press release sent out by
the founder of that site, revealing not only his real name, but also
the fact that he likes to characterize himself as a "mysterious
Egyptian tycoon". I should try that line:
KIBO: The world is going to end because the Earth's two moons
are going to collide, first the purple one, then the plaid one!
RATIONAL PERSON: That's somewhat implausible.
KIBO: But I'm a Mysterious Egyptian Tycoon!
RATIONAL PERSON: Wow! I am now completely gullible due to you
being both mysterious and a tycoon! Here, have even more money!
[express-press-release.com]
=>
=> Mysterious Egyptian tycoon launches sixty-four thousand dollar
=> question- who sanctioned Sunday as God`s holy Sabbath day
=>
=> Released on = February 1, 2006, 1:30 am
=>
=> Press Release Author = Galal Doss
=>
=> Industry = Education
=>
=> Press Release Summary = Egyptian businessman Galal Doss
=> officially offers $64,000 to any individual who can prove the
=> Bible shows that Christ or any one of his disciples sanctioned
=> the transfer of the holy Sabbath from Saturday to Sunday.
=> Mr Doss is determined to show the world that major religious
=> figures, including many Popes of Rome, have been misleading
=> their followers, and hopes this initiative will encourage
=> Christians to challenge received wisdom on the subject. [...]
In case you're wondering, he is the CEO of a cosmetics company,
and currently owns nearly four million shares (about a quarter)
of the Cross pen company.
The Cross logo is just the word "CROSS" in block letters. But a
few years ago, it was slightly more complicated -- it was the word
"CROSS" surrounded by... a crescent. Now the crescent's gone,
but the Cross logo still has no damn cross. Coincidence... or penspiracy?
Will it still count as the Mark Of The Beast if I write it with
a Bic Banana? What if Charles Nelson Reilly dresses up as a giant
banana and prances around singing and worshipping the false idol
of the Bic Banana? What if he uses one to write the Mark Of The Beast
on a blue card as the answer to a "Match Game '76" question?
Would that make him win the $64,000 prize, and if so, would some
other guy on "The $64,000 Question" win a seventy-six dollar prize?
Why is Charles Nelson Reilly still on my TV?
-- K.
I will pay $64,001 to anyone
who can prove I am the Antichrist.
$64,002 if they can get
Charles Nelson Reilly to hold up
a card saying "KIBO IS THE ANTICHRIST"
on a "Match Game '76" rerun.
Adam Funk
> I did a little digging, and turned up a press release sent out by
> the founder of that site, revealing not only his real name, but also
> the fact that he likes to characterize himself as a "mysterious
> Egyptian tycoon".
Not the one who owns Harrod's?
--
It was down by the dank tarn of Auber,
In the ghoul-haunted woodland of Weir.
[Poe]
Mark Edwards
No cluons were harmed when ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry)
wrote:
> -- K.
>
> I will pay $64,001 to anyone
> who can prove I am the Antichrist.
"My son is the uppercase-initial-cap Antichrist. Kibo's mommy."
Quod Erratum Defenestrator.
Now where can I pick up my 64,001 Scoville units?
Mark Edwards
--
Proof of Sanity Forged Upon Request
David DeLaney
>few years ago, it was slightly more complicated -- it was the word
>"CROSS" surrounded by... a crescent. Now the crescent's gone,
>but the Cross logo still has no damn cross. Coincidence... or penspiracy?
I just recently re-located the Cross pens I got for high school graduation,
which had been sitting in their box, in a box in my walk-in closet up high on
a shelf, for Some Time. (This is because I had to move just about everything
OUT of said room so they could install a vertical-column air-conditioning/
central-heating system to replace the one in the ceiling that dripped and
leaked. Thus the rest of my apartment is currently Overfull, and I will be
alphabetizing and inventoryizing as I move stuff back in. It's like my own
little storage shed, included in the rent.)
>Why is Charles Nelson Reilly still on my TV?
You got the enhanced version, remember? Have you tried rolling over him with
the Katamari Damacy bumpyball?
Dave
--
\/David DeLaney posting from d...@vic.com "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://www.vic.com/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ & Magic / I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
madge
<ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
> Why is Charles Nelson Reilly still on my TV?
Is there anything better on?
>
> -- K.
>
> I will pay $64,001 to anyone
> who can prove I am the Antichrist.
>
> $64,002 if they can get
> Charles Nelson Reilly to hold up
> a card saying "KIBO IS THE
> ANTICHRIST"
> on a "Match Game '76" rerun.
http://home.btconnect.com/kibo/kiboitan.jpg
Give the money to charity
Chris McGonnell
>James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>>The Cross logo is just the word "CROSS" in block letters. But a
>>few years ago, it was slightly more complicated -- it was the word
>>"CROSS" surrounded by... a crescent. Now the crescent's gone,
>>but the Cross logo still has no damn cross. Coincidence... or penspiracy?
>
>I just recently re-located the Cross pens I got for high school graduation,
Guess you didn't really need them for college after all!
Sorry, I shoulda given you $50 instead.
Uncle Chris
--
Chris McG.
Harming humanity since 1951.
"My dog ate my gratitude journal." -- Paula
--
Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
David DeLaney
>On Fri, 22 Sep 2006 09:05:20 -0400, David DeLaney wrote:
>>James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>>>The Cross logo is just the word "CROSS" in block letters. But a
>>>few years ago, it was slightly more complicated -- it was the word
>>>"CROSS" surrounded by... a crescent. Now the crescent's gone,
>>>but the Cross logo still has no damn cross. Coincidence... or penspiracy?
>>
>>I just recently re-located the Cross pens I got for high school graduation,
>
>Guess you didn't really need them for college after all!
I had enough regular ones left over. Serious dorkism indicator: in high school
I regularly had a pocket with more than 50 pens and pencils in it.
>Sorry, I shoulda given you $50 instead.
Eh, I wouldn't have had that tucked away somewhere to find again later, so
it's just as well.
James Kibo Parry
>
> James "Kibo" Parry (ki...@world.std.com) wrote:
> >
> > Why is Charles Nelson Reilly still on my TV?
>
> You got the enhanced version, remember?
Oh, so that's why the phaser beams he fires from his giant eyeglasses
look mechanically-generated and not hand-drawn. I forgot that starting
last weekend they were rebroadcasting all those episodes with new
computer-animated effects in place of things like that rubber Neanderthal
mask Gene Rayburn used to wear.
> Have you tried rolling over him with the Katamari Damacy bumpyball?
No, because I can't play it on my tiny little Nintendo DS, and even if
I could, it would suck because games that involve detailed 3-D things
aren't a lot of fun to play on such a tiny screen. The DS is really
good for old-school 2-D games -- I love "Pac-Pix" and the various
"WarioWare" games -- but it's painful trying to focus your eyes on
something like "Pac'N'Roll". And don't get me started on the
GameBoy Advance versions of "Simpsons Road Rage" and "Tron 2.0",
which rank right up there with the Atari 2600 "Tempest" prototype
on the list of "Ports They Should Have Known Better Than To Attempt".
So, anyway, I don't have anything I can play Katamari Damacy on.
When the Nintendo Wii comes out, assuming I have more cash resources
by then, I might buy one, and then I could at least play GameCube
games like "Burnout 2" (I only like the crash mode -- it's fun to
try to cause the worst highway tragedy in human history!) but I
don't have (or plan to acquire) any Sony game hardware, just 'cause
Katamari Damacy is the only Sony-platform game I'm even remotely
interested in. Sony's platforms have the most computing power,
but Nintendo has stuff where you get to doodle on the screen and
vomit goldfish at girls.
This means you should buy me a PlayStation 3 so that you'll be allowed
to tell me what to do to Charles Nelson Reilly with the Katamari Damacy
ballwad.
-- K.
I heard Charles Nelson Reilly
has authorized a "Match Game '76 2K6"
game for the Nintendo Wii-Wii.
James Kibo Parry
>
> James "Kibo" Parry (ki...@world.std.com) wrote:
> >
> > I did a little digging, and turned up a press release sent out by
> > the founder of that site, revealing not only his real name, but also
> > the fact that he likes to characterize himself as a "mysterious
> > Egyptian tycoon".
>
> Not the one who owns Harrod's?
No, that's a different crazy Egyptian tycoon, and that's assuming he
even is crazy, which is a pretty safe assumption because once Diana Spencer
marries into your family all her new relatives are automatically crazy,
especially if any of them produced the terrible Spielberg movie "Hook"
in which Robin Williams takes forever to get to the fireworks factory.
(I heard the working title for that film was "Pedo Pan".)
What does this have to do with the ancient art of braintanning,
and why isn't Charles Nelson Reilly mentioned in this sentence?
-- K.
It's too bad the U.S.
doesn't have anything
like Harrod's. We don't
even have the West
Edmonton Mall. I say
we should annex Canada
and England to improve
our shopping experience.
David DeLaney
>
>No, because I can't play it on my tiny little Nintendo DS, and even if
>I could, it would suck because games that involve detailed 3-D things
>aren't a lot of fun to play on such a tiny screen.
Ah. I feel for you, because at some point I'm gonna have to break down and
buy a TV just so I can play the PS2 games again. (Gaming store closed ==
Dave doesn't have free access to a TV no more.)
>This means you should buy me a PlayStation 3 so that you'll be allowed
>to tell me what to do to Charles Nelson Reilly with the Katamari Damacy
>ballwad.
Apologies; I cannot afford a third dimension for my Playstation^2 right now.
Dave "now wondering what sound he'd make when you rolled him up" DeLaney
TomH
> Seen today at a used-book store:
>
> "Wet-Scrape Braintanned Buckskin"
> Then I tried to convert it into "Battlestar: Galactica" fan-fiction
> all about wet-scrape braintanned Starbuckskin, but the story abruptly
You Bastard! I may never be able to drink coffee again![1]
> Finally, I tried to just turn the story into an educational adventure
> of Archie and Jughead learning how to wet-scrape braintanned buckskin,
> but the hide kept coming out bright orange with cross-hatching all over
Sometimes it takes a while for my own brane to absorb some
minutiae, but I now geddit about your fascination with orange
hair.[2]
Also, curiosity-sating information was found at this linky,
[ http://www.braintan.com/articles/furs/george2.html ]
including the awesome Zombie-esque statement:
"Remember to put the bowl with the brain in it in the
refrigerator until you need it again."
[1] ... without wishing for the opportunity to take in the aroma
of newly wet-scrape-braintanned Arabica-Sumatran blends.
My coffee experiences will now be discounted by the Kibo
Factor.
[2] You still have hair, don't you?
--
TomH [ antonomasia <at> gmail <dot> com ]
Adam Funk
> I had enough regular ones left over. Serious dorkism indicator: in high school
> I regularly had a pocket with more than 50 pens and pencils in it.
I've been under the impression that if a "pocket" isn't integrated
into a piece of clothing it's a "bag".
--
The dark smell of dankness grew stronger and stronger.
[G.P. Taylor]
David DeLaney
>On 2006-09-22, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>>I had enough regular ones left over. Serious dorkism indicator: in high school
>>I regularly had a pocket with more than 50 pens and pencils in it.
>
>I've been under the impression that if a "pocket" isn't integrated
>into a piece of clothing it's a "bag".
Regular old pants pocket. Usually on corduroys, given the dress code of my
high school and the general weather of Cleveland during the school year.
bar...@bookpro.com
DeLaney) wrote:
>On Sat, 23 Sep 2006 13:56:28 +0100, Adam Funk <a24...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>>On 2006-09-22, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>>>I had enough regular ones left over. Serious dorkism indicator: in high school
>>>I regularly had a pocket with more than 50 pens and pencils in it.
>>
>>I've been under the impression that if a "pocket" isn't integrated
>>into a piece of clothing it's a "bag".
>
>Regular old pants pocket. Usually on corduroys, given the dress code of my
>high school and the general weather of Cleveland during the school year.
Say, is that 50 pens in your pocket, or ...
BW
Paula
<smea...@notthisverizon.net> wrote:
>On Fri, 22 Sep 2006 09:05:20 -0400, David DeLaney wrote:
>
>>James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>>>The Cross logo is just the word "CROSS" in block letters. But a
>>>few years ago, it was slightly more complicated -- it was the word
>>>"CROSS" surrounded by... a crescent. Now the crescent's gone,
>>>but the Cross logo still has no damn cross. Coincidence... or penspiracy?
>>
>>I just recently re-located the Cross pens I got for high school graduation,
>
>Guess you didn't really need them for college after all!
>
>Sorry, I shoulda given you $50 instead.
You shoulda given me BOTH, you cheap bastard!
Actually, I got nothing for high school graduation except some luggage
to pack for college from my parents. I think it was on sale in one of
those payment flap ads from the credit card company.
--
Paula
"Anyway, other people are weird, but sometimes they have candy,
so it's best to try to get along with them." Joe Bay
Mark Edwards
No cluons were harmed when Paula <mmmtob...@earthlink.ent> wrote:
>Actually, I got nothing for high school graduation except
>some luggage to pack for college from my parents. I think it
>was on sale in one of those payment flap ads from the credit card
>company.
At least you got that. All I got was a G.E.D. and a stint in the US
Air Force. Oh? And a tattoo.
Pavel314
news:slrnehaf3...@gatekeeper.vic.com...
> On Sat, 23 Sep 2006 13:56:28 +0100, Adam Funk <a24...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>>On 2006-09-22, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>>>I had enough regular ones left over. Serious dorkism indicator: in high
>>>school
>>>I regularly had a pocket with more than 50 pens and pencils in it.
>>
>>I've been under the impression that if a "pocket" isn't integrated
>>into a piece of clothing it's a "bag".
>
> Regular old pants pocket. Usually on corduroys, given the dress code of my
> high school and the general weather of Cleveland during the school year.
>
> Dave
In an earlier age, the mid 1960's, my high school dorkism was wearing a
slide rule on my belt and reading "The Handbook of Chemistry and Physics" in
study hall. Coincidently, this was in Wickliffe, a suburb to the East of
Cleveland.
Paul
Adam Funk
> On Sat, 23 Sep 2006 13:56:28 +0100, Adam Funk <a24...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>>On 2006-09-22, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>>>I had enough regular ones left over. Serious dorkism indicator: in high school
>>>I regularly had a pocket with more than 50 pens and pencils in it.
>>
>>I've been under the impression that if a "pocket" isn't integrated
>>into a piece of clothing it's a "bag".
>
> Regular old pants pocket. Usually on corduroys, given the dress code of my
> high school and the general weather of Cleveland during the school year.
I think Ignatius J Reilly had similar trousers.
--
And on special dank midnights in August he peeks
out of the shutters and sometimes he speaks
and tells how the Lorax was lifted away. [Dr. Seuss]
Chris McGonnell
>On Fri, 22 Sep 2006 11:57:14 -0400, Chris McGonnell
><smea...@notthisverizon.net> wrote:
>
>>On Fri, 22 Sep 2006 09:05:20 -0400, David DeLaney wrote:
>>
>>>James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>>>>The Cross logo is just the word "CROSS" in block letters. But a
>>>>few years ago, it was slightly more complicated -- it was the word
>>>>"CROSS" surrounded by... a crescent. Now the crescent's gone,
>>>>but the Cross logo still has no damn cross. Coincidence... or penspiracy?
>>>
>>>I just recently re-located the Cross pens I got for high school graduation,
>>
>>Guess you didn't really need them for college after all!
>>
>>Sorry, I shoulda given you $50 instead.
>
>You shoulda given me BOTH, you cheap bastard!
>
>Actually, I got nothing for high school graduation except some luggage
>to pack for college from my parents. I think it was on sale in one of
>those payment flap ads from the credit card company.
I got $100 from my grandparents, but my parents made me start a
checking account with it. I also got a tailored navy blue sharkskin
suit for my graduation from my parents who tactfully included a
footlocker to pack my gear in when I left.
I still have the suit, but it has shrunk around the waist.
TeaLady (Mari C.)
news:tm3gh21lljqkk9cc2...@4ax.com:
I got a job. I already had a job, but I got to keep it. Then
I ran off with a carnival for the summer, and if I got any
gifties from relatives, my mom kept them. She was pissed that
she couldn't run off with the carnival, I think.
I did get a nice stuffed bison from the 2nd carnival I worked
for. But I don't think it was for HS graduation - the owners
gave it to me when I went back home, a cheap but tangible
going away gift.
--
TeaLady (mari)
"The principle of Race is meant to embody and express the
utter negation of human freedom, the denial of equal rights, a
challenge in the face of mankind." A. Kolnai
Avast ye scurvy dogs ! Thar be no disease in this message.
Chris McGonnell
Well, DUH! You got to have fun while your poor Ma hadda be grownup and
responsible and stuff.
>I did get a nice stuffed bison from the 2nd carnival I worked
>for. But I don't think it was for HS graduation - the owners
>gave it to me when I went back home, a cheap but tangible
>going away gift.
You went back home and irked your Mom with your tales of adventure,
didn't ya? You were a mean kid.
Otto Bahn
> I still have the suit, but it has shrunk around the waist.
It's a little known fact that pants shrink when stored
in a closet.
--oTTo--
Chris McGonnell
Now explain how the wire hangers multiply inside said closet.
18th Spartan
Chris McGonnell wrote:
> On Tue, 26 Sep 2006 12:07:20 -0400, Otto Bahn wrote:
>
> >"Chris McGonnell" <smea...@notthisverizon.net> wrote
> >
> >> I still have the suit, but it has shrunk around the waist.
> >
> >It's a little known fact that pants shrink when stored
> >in a closet.
>
> Now explain how the wire hangers multiply inside said closet.
I am going to attempt a real world 'speriment to get to the bottom of
this mystery.I will suspend a digital camera programmed to take a shot
every minute over a milk crate full of guitar cords(I will make sure no
idiots are outside on their cell phones in their BMW's)to see just how
they tangle themselves up whilst I am having hot wet, er, while I am
not looking.
Otto Bahn
> > >It's a little known fact that pants shrink when stored
> > >in a closet.
> >
> > Now explain how the wire hangers multiply inside said closet.
>
> I am going to attempt a real world 'speriment to get to the bottom of
> this mystery.I will suspend a digital camera programmed to take a shot
> every minute over a milk crate full of guitar cords(I will make sure no
> idiots are outside on their cell phones in their BMW's)to see just how
> they tangle themselves up whilst I am having hot wet, er, while I am
> not looking.
I'll give usenet credit for one thing -- it explains
where all the missing socks are.
--oTTo--
Bryce Utting
>>> I still have the suit, but it has shrunk around the waist.
>>
>>It's a little known fact that pants shrink when stored
>>in a closet.
>
> Now explain how the wire hangers multiply inside said closet.
you've noticed how you never have as many paper clips as you thought
you did, right?
exactly. they're larval hangers, and creep along the baseboards
unseen during the night to hide out at the back of wardrobes until
they're ready to hatch.
butting
--
I am very new to programming drivers so if I sound un-knowledgeable
then it's because I am.
-- first4internet's Ceri Coburn on writing Sony's DRM rootkit
http://homepages.ihug.co.nz/~butting
Adam Funk
> I'll give usenet credit for one thing -- it explains
> where all the missing socks are.
I can't find alt.socks on my BBS.
--
All your basement are dank!!!
shelly
> On 2006-09-27, Otto Bahn <e...@eio.com> wrote:
>
>
>>I'll give usenet credit for one thing -- it explains
>>where all the missing socks are.
>
>
> I can't find alt.socks on my BBS.
Did you try clicking on the bottom button?
--
Shelly (Warning: see label for details)
http://www.cat-sidh.net (the Mother Ship)
http://esther.cat-sidh.net (Letters to Esther)
Otto Bahn
> >>I'll give usenet credit for one thing -- it explains
> >>where all the missing socks are.
> >
> > I can't find alt.socks on my BBS.
>
> Did you try clicking on the bottom button?
Please watch your language, young lady. This is a family
chat forum.
--oTTo--
shelly
If you don't want your kids reading about the secret sex lives of
paper clips and socks, maybe you should have the interwebs turned off?
Or, hey: http://snipurl.com/xecq
Otto Bahn
> >>>>I'll give usenet credit for one thing -- it explains
> >>>>where all the missing socks are.
> >>>
> >>>I can't find alt.socks on my BBS.
> >>
> >>Did you try clicking on the bottom button?
> >
> > Please watch your language, young lady. This is a family
> > chat forum.
>
> If you don't want your kids reading about the secret sex lives of
> paper clips and socks, maybe you should have the interwebs turned off?
>
> Or, hey: http://snipurl.com/xecq
Jeebus! At least use ROT-26 when posting that stuff.
--oTTo--
shelly
And double your pleasure!
Rich Holmes
> you've noticed how you never have as many paper clips as you thought
> you did, right?
>
> exactly. they're larval hangers, and creep along the baseboards
> unseen during the night to hide out at the back of wardrobes until
> they're ready to hatch.
Yes, Avram, and the bicycles?
--
- Doctroid Doctroid Holmes <http://www.richholmes.net/doctroid/>
Ancient use of incendiary pigs as an anti-elephant measure is
disqualified on grounds of pigs not being cows, even when on fire.
-- John D Salt
Bryce Utting
> Bryce Utting <but...@ihug.co.nz> writes:
>
>> you've noticed how you never have as many paper clips as you thought
>> you did, right?
>>
>> exactly. they're larval hangers, and creep along the baseboards
>> unseen during the night to hide out at the back of wardrobes until
>> they're ready to hatch.
>
> Yes, Avram, and the bicycles?
the bicycles are the very definition of free love.
don't harsh their buzz, man.
TeaLady (Mari C.)
> You went back home and irked your Mom with your tales of
> adventure, didn't ya? You were a mean kid.
>
Yup. Mom was inconsolable, until she trapped an ex-carni and
his brother in the basement. The ex-carni went back to the
carnival after a month, but the brother was trapped for a while
longer.
So she did get to be irresponsible, just later, and at home.
Hearing my mom talk to her friend about wild sex was squicky.
Mark Edwards
No cluons were harmed when Chris McGonnell
<smea...@notthisverizon.net> wrote:
>Now explain how the wire hangers multiply inside said closet.
There was a short story which explained the larval stages involved:
Paper clip
Pen (I think)
Clothes hanger
Bicycle
All perfectly clear...
Adam Funk
> (This is because I had to move just about everything OUT of said
> room so they could install a vertical-column air-conditioning/
> central-heating system to replace the one in the ceiling that
> dripped and leaked.
Have you suggested changing the Serpinski gasket?
David DeLaney
>On 2006-09-22, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>> (This is because I had to move just about everything OUT of said
>> room so they could install a vertical-column air-conditioning/
>> central-heating system to replace the one in the ceiling that
>> dripped and leaked.
>
>Have you suggested changing the Serpinski gasket?
Sierpinski. No, because that takes too long. I'm up to "D" in the
realphabetization of that room.
Dave
--
\/David DeLaney posting from d...@vic.com "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://www.vic.com/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ & Magic / I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
Adam Funk
>>Have you suggested changing the Serpinski gasket?
>
> Sierpinski.
I've seen it both ways and didn't know which one was right!
> No, because that takes too long. I'm up to "D" in the
> realphabetization of that room.
So you've brushed all the Cantor Dust (or is it labelled "Dust,
Cantor"?) back into the jar and filed it?
--
It was down by the dank tarn of Auber,
In the ghoul-haunted woodland of Weir.
[Poe]
David DeLaney
>On 2006-10-12, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>> Sierpinski.
>
>I've seen it both ways and didn't know which one was right!
Actually I think there's a bar across the S, or something.
>> No, because that takes too long. I'm up to "D" in the
>> realphabetization of that room.
>
>So you've brushed all the Cantor Dust (or is it labelled "Dust,
>Cantor"?) back into the jar and filed it?
No, it got sucked out by the new central-air-monster-vac-machine that's
standing next to the middle of the room and dusted evenly over the rest
of the apartment's surfaces. At least it's not glitter.
Dave "and wouldn't it be "Dust, Cantorian"?" DeLaney
Adam Funk
>>I've seen it both ways and didn't know which one was right!
>
> Actually I think there's a bar across the S, or something.
Again with the Polish notation!
>>So you've brushed all the Cantor Dust (or is it labelled "Dust,
>>Cantor"?) back into the jar and filed it?
>
> No, it got sucked out by the new central-air-monster-vac-machine that's
> standing next to the middle of the room and dusted evenly over the rest
> of the apartment's surfaces. At least it's not glitter.
But it's not countable, is it?
--
He could feel the creature inside his mind and taste
its dank, ghastly breath as it breathed through his
mouth. [G.P. Taylor]
David DeLaney
>On 2006-10-12, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>>>So you've brushed all the Cantor Dust (or is it labelled "Dust,
>>>Cantor"?) back into the jar and filed it?
>>
>> No, it got sucked out by the new central-air-monster-vac-machine that's
>> standing next to the middle of the room and dusted evenly over the rest
>> of the apartment's surfaces. At least it's not glitter.
>
>But it's not countable, is it?
Do I -look- like a vampire?
Dave "I have other things to obsess about" DeLaney
Adam Funk
> Do I -look- like a vampire?
I don't know. Put an up-to-date photo on yougotta.com.
--
When Toad found himself immured in a dank and noisome dungeon, ... he
flung himself at full length on the floor, and shed bitter tears, and
abandoned himself to dark despair. [Kenneth Grahame]
David DeLaney
>On 2006-10-12, David DeLaney <d...@gatekeeper.vic.com> wrote:
>> Do I -look- like a vampire?
>
>I don't know. Put an up-to-date photo on yougotta.com.
Not not not gonna!
The one that's there still looks like me, except now there's a gray goatee
in midbeard, grey streaks at the temples, and gre/ay in the mustache. I
still have that dazed look (and can inflict it on surrounding people nearly
at will), and I still have at least one of those hats. (The shirt, if it's
the one I'm thinking of, disappeared VERY shortly after the picture was taken,
alas.)
I weigh about 50 pounds more than then, but in the visible area it only
shows as a slightly puffy face.
I can say "bleh! Bleh!" with the best of them though.
Dave