Sermon for Proper 14B
Judy
Dear Friends,
This Sunday’s sermon is entitled “‘Anger’ + ‘D’= ‘DANGER!’” or “Please Engage Brain before Putting Mouth into Gear” and deals with the epistle (Ephesians 4:25-5:2). Here it is:
Did you hear Paul’s instructions about anger in his letter to the Ephesian church? He wrote, “Don't get so angry that you sin. Don't go to bed angry and don't give the devil a chance. Stop all your dirty talk. Say the right thing at the right time and help others by what you say. Stop being bitter and angry and mad at others. Don't yell at one another or curse each other or ever be rude. Instead, be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ. Do as God does. After all, you are his dear children. Let love be your guide.” Who does he think we are...Superman or Wonder Woman? I’d like us to look at the hard topic of anger. Is it always a sin? What do you do about those powerful feelings? I’m here to tell you that anger is one of the devil’s most valuable tools to destroy us, those we love, along with our enemies.
IS ANGER ALWAYS A SIN? Well, remember- Jesus was sinless, yet we heard of a time in Holy Scripture when he was angry. Do you remember when it was? Sure- when he drove the moneychangers out of the temple. Jesus’ anger in the temple porch was righteous anger because travelers were being misused- charged outrageous prices for exchanging money and then charged outrageous prices again for purchasing defective animals to sacrifice in the temple. On top of that, they were doing all this buying and selling in the porch of the Gentiles- the only place the Gentiles could worship. Jesus’ anger was because of injustice, and his actions afterward didn’t hurt anyone- just solved the problem. Did you notice Paul says, “Don’t get so angry that you sin?” In other words, it’s not the anger that is the sin- it’s what you do with it. It’s not how I feel- it’s what I say. It’s not my inner emotion- it’s what I do, my action. We can’t usually control how we feel, but we most certainly can control what we say and do, and it’s important that we do so. Spell the word “danger.” Now spell it again, but skip the first letter. What word did you spell? Sure- “anger” because anger is just one letter away from “danger!” I’m sure you’ve heard people say- “I can’t help it!” That’s the excuse my schoolchildren tried to use when I was still teaching. “Mrs. Boli, he made me do it” didn’t hold water with me then and it doesn’t hold water when we try to tell God (or ourselves) now.
That’s easy to say, but hard to actually accomplish. Rev. Stanley Sims used to quote an old saying by Molefi Asante, “There are two things over which you have complete dominion, authority, and control--your mind and your mouth.” Sin starts in our minds (and bodies) with a strong emotion; it goes from there to our mouths and actions. God has high standards for us about how we deal with anger- no damage (physically or emotionally). Fix the problem if you can, but don’t damage the person who is acting like your enemy. How do I know? Jesus said, “LOVE (want what’s best for) your enemy and pray for them.” How do you keep from sinning when someone has angered you?
FIRST- STOP! Don’t do anything. Get away from the situation so you can calm down. It takes a clear mind to figure out how to solve anger-producing problems, and you can’t do it while you’re boiling with fury inside, while all your fight-or flight hormones are coursing through your blood vessels. Example: Mike Fuller, who was a safety and punt-return specialist for the San Diego Chargers in the late 1970s, spoke about anger this way- “The wide receivers are continually trying to make us angry each time they come into our area, because they know if they can upset us emotionally, they can fool us on the next play.” So how do you clear your mind and body of the poisonous effects of anger? Go for a walk, listen to some music or get involved with a really good TV program or video game, exercise, cook, clean. DON’T sit and brood and DON’T try to dull your anger with alcohol or another substance. You’re trying to clear your head, not muddle it. Once you’ve calmed down, remember this fact- the person who angers you, controls you. Look at the thought for the week: “Any person capable of angering you becomes your master. That person can anger you only when you permit yourself to be disturbed by him or her” (Epictetus).
SECOND- While you’re at it, be sure your data is correct. There’s an old poem that goes:
I'm always careful of the words I speak, I keep them soft and sweet,
I never know from day to day which ones I'll have to eat!
NEXT- FIGURE OUT HOW TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM. Remember what Paul said, “Don't go to bed angry and don't give the devil a chance,” in other words- don’t nurse your anger. Don’t allow yourself to become bitter. Don’t get on the phone and enjoy telling your friends how shamefully someone has treated you. If you do choose to discuss the situation, work on how to solve the problem. Then solve the problem if you can.
FINALLY- DON’T LET YOUR ENEMY BRING YOU DOWN TO THEIR LEVEL. Did you hear the story of the elderly woman on her death bed? Her pastor came to visit and asked if she had forgiven all her enemies. “All but one,” she answered. “I really haven’t been able to forgive my sister.” “You have to forgive her,” the pastor replied, “or God won’t forgive you, and you don’t have that much time.” “All right,” she said, “bring my sister here.” When her sister walked into the hospital room, the woman looked daggers at her and said, “I forgive you, BUT IF I GET BETTER, IT DOESN’T COUNT!” Don’t be that way! Look at Paul’s advice: “Don't yell at one another or curse each other or ever be rude. Instead, be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ. Do as God does. After all, you are his dear children. Let love be your guide.” Why not? Because you allowed God to lose this round and the devil to win. Your enemy has become your master and forced you to do or say things you knew better than to do or say as God’s precious child. Did you hear the prayer someone prayed? “Dear God, so far today I've done all right. I haven't gossiped; I haven't lost my temper; I haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish or over-indulgent. I'm very thankful for that. But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed, and from then on, I'm probably going to need a lot of help.” You’ve got all the help you need- just don’t think you can do this on your own. Keep your walk with the Lord strong; receive your Holy Communion at least once a week; say your prayers; and think before you speak or act. May God bless us all as by God’s grace we stay in control of our minds and therefore our mouths and actions. Amen.
For anyone who is interested, this sermon and updated African-American wisdom statements are posted on our parish’s web site under “Sermons & Stuff”. The address is: http://www.stpaulsepisag.org .
Blessed preaching,
Judy Boli
St. Paul's Episcopal Church
Saginaw, Michigan