Review: Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over (2003)
Harvey S. Karten
Reviewed by: Harvey S. Karten
Grade: B
Dimensionh Films
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez
Written by: Robert Rodriguez
Cast: Antonio Banderas, Carla Gugino, Alexa Vega, Daryl
Sabara, Sylvester Stallone, Ricardo Montalban, Salma Hayek
Screened at: Broadway, NYC, 7/15/03
For hundreds of years, chess was the game that enraptured
the entire world. Chess is a game requiring patience, skill,
emotional and intellectual maturity and long years of practice.
But then the 20th century rolled around. During the final decade
of so of the 1900's and then into the 21st century, games makers
came across a problem. To play chess requires that the
participants think. So the people that happily part the young
'uns from their parents' well-earned cash invented the video
game. Video games are valuable despite the penchant of the
players for immediate gratification. They encourage manual
dexterity and require athletic coordination. They do not require
long and philosophical musings over a board. As laziness
increased among the young, making such games too energetic
to play, the movies took over, this summer featuring such video-
like exercises like "T3" and "Hulk." You don't have to push and
pull any buttoms: just sit back, and if you're in an energetic
mood, gobble the popcorn. But those blockbusters are violent
and not suitable for the 5-11 age group which requires exciting
entertainment with less ferocity. Since necessity is the mother
of invention, Robert Rodriguez, who began making home
movies from the age of 13 and stunned the film world by
creating a quality film, "El Mariachi" for $7,000, had an idea.
Having reworked "Mariachi" into a new, shaggy-dog movie,
"Desperado," he knew he had the cast that could be used for
just about anything Antonio Banderas, Salma Hayek, Steve
Buscemi, Cheech Marin all appear in his latest venture whose
shaggy-dog texture remains but is filled out by the miracle of 3-
D technology.
When patrons enter the auditorium, they are given cardboard
glasses each bearing a red plastic lens and a blue one. The
idea seems to be that if you're not going to be wildly original in
the year 2003, why not use a blast from the past? Back in
fifties, when I first developed headaches from seeing pics like
"House of Wax" and "Bwana Devil" with the strange lenses, I
figured that the technology was on the way out. And I was right.
The specs were uncomfortable. The movies forgot about plot in
their attempts to make people duck and dodge the flying objects
headed toward them in their seats. Sure enough, out went the
fad, to be revived later by IMAX, with a more sophisticated set of
goggles that covered half your head and produced characters
who practically sat on your nose. "Spy Kids 3D: Game Over"
looks back to the fifties by using pretty much the technology that
made "Bwana Devil" an ache in in the head, while looking
forward to the age of video games way way forward, it seems,
to a time that the violence in these toys would become strictly of
a cartoon nature, the heroes and villains virtually winking at you
as though to say, "Just kidding, folks."
"Spy Kids 3D" is not a sequel though it employs many of the
same performers of the other two versions, "Spy Kids" and "Spy
Kids 2", nor does it have the coherent plot that made the first
venture in 1998 a solid story. The plot now, such that it is, deals
with the need for young Juni Cortez (Daryl Sabara) to save his
sister Carmen (Alexa Vega) from the clutches of the evil
Toymaker (Sylvester Stallone) whose aim is to rule the world by
imprisoning its youth inside the video game. (That's the realistic
part.) Juni gets the heads-up from the president of the United
States (George Clooney) that he must come out of retirement as
a secret agent to rescue his sib. Entering the game with the help
of scientists like Francesa Giggles (Salma Hayek, given braids
to look 15 years younger), he must go through an obstacle
course and rise to level 5, opening the door to allow Carmen to
escape. On the way he meets people who are sometimes
hostile and competitive and sometimes friendly. Why so? Who
knows? The object is to thrill us in the audience by throwing at
us everything that's not nailed down metal pieces from the
robots that Juni meets, the tongues of frogs lashing out as
though the folks in the first row were flies, laser beams from
weapons borrowed from the residents of "Star Wars," you-
name-it. Juni Cortez may not be Harry Potter, but he has fun
his own way. He enlists the help of his wheelchair-bound
grandfather (played by Ricardo Montalban who is in reality
physically challenged as the result of botched back surgery) and
various nerds and strong kids whose trepidations are overcome
by the fearsome 11-year-old, leading to the defeat of the wicked
Toymaker, who appears to talk to himself a lot but who has
been split into four people, each looking strangely like Sly.
With its strong moral message essentially, dig your family and
dig the whole world because everyone is your family (sounds
like philosopher Peter Singer's point of view) "Spy Kids 3-D" is
colorful, amusing, just scary enough to keep the toddlers
involved--in short nothing if not an experience in depth.
Rated PG. 85 minutes.(c) 2003 by Harvey Karten at
Harvey...@cs.com
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Susan Granger
The third installment in Robert Rodriguez' successful "Spy Kids" franchise
has three strikes against it: a) the once-adorable "kids" are growing up, b) the
'50s style blue-and-red style cardboard 3-D glasses are a pain, and c) there's
too much blatant computer-game merchandising.
As the story begins, the no-longer-cherubic, 11 year-old secret agent Juni
Cortez (Daryl Sabara) is recruited from 'retirement' by OSS leaders (Salma
Heyek, Mike Judge) and the President of the United States (George Clooney).
Juni's assignment is penetrate the highest level of a mysteriously menacing
video game, created by The Toymaker (Sylvester Stallone), who battles his own
split-personalities as he holds Juni's sister Carmen (Alexa Vega) hostage in
cyberspace. When Juni's allowed one companion on this perilous quest, he wisely
chooses his grandpa (Ricardo Montalban) who soon becomes a superhero. While
there are some clever allusions - Juni's known as "The Guy," a play on "The One"
from "The Matrix," and Montalban's wheelchair is "fine Corinthian leather," etc.
- the video-game characters are inexplicably and unpredictably hostile, then
friendly, but most often duplicitous, noting: "Time flies when you're playing
games!" Antonio Banderas, Carla Gugino, Cheech Marin, and Holland Taylor appear
briefly in cameos, along with Steve Buscemi, Alan Cummings, Bill Paxton, Emily
Osment, reprising their previous "Spy Kids" characters. On the Granger Movie
Gauge of 1 to 10, "Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over" is a mindlessly chaotic,
family-friendly 5, but parents should be prepared to fork out for the
video-game, in addition to the video games for "Pirates of the Caribbean,"
"Finding Nemo," "Enter the Matrix," "Hulk," and "X-Men 2: Wolverine's Revenge."
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Steve Rhodes
A film review by Steve Rhodes
Copyright 2003 Steve Rhodes
RATING (0 TO ****): **
Hello eyestrain! 3-D always was and still is a bad idea for movies. In SPY
KIDS 3-D: GAME OVER, writer/director Robert Rodriguez tries to revive a series
running out of fresh ideas by making it mostly in 3-D. The audience,
especially those who wear glasses, will be happy to hear that a small part of
the film is set in the much more eye-friendly 2-D.
The grief that the movie will give your eyes is the subject of the script's
best joke. At the start of the picture, Fegan Floop (Alan Cumming) explains to
the audience how to know when to put on those ridiculous red-and-green glasses,
which distort the images and colors horribly. Afterwards, he tells the
audience what to do if they want to take a break from staring through the silly
spectacles. He advises them to take off the glasses and head for the
concession stand where the theater will be happy to sell them an extra large
popcorn and soda for only thirty-five dollars!
Basically the entire cast from the first two pictures appears again. The
operative word in the previous sentence is "appears." The movie stars Daryl
Sabara, incorrectly placed fourth in credit order, who repeats his role as Juni
Cortez. Juni's sister, Carmen (Alexa Vega), who is stuck inside a video game
named "Game Over," doesn't even make an appearance until the last act.
Although her screen time is brief, it's more than that of Antonio Banderas and
Carla Gugino, who play the kids' parents. The only other family member who is
featured is the kids' grandfather (Ricardo Montalban), a wheelchair-bound
ex-agent who shows he still has a lot of kick in him. The actor who
consistently steals the show is Sylvester Stallone, who plays the hilariously
evil Toymaker, the controller of the game.
As Juni fights his way through the game in order to find and free his sister,
we find that we don't care. We're way too busy trying to adjust those
ridiculous 3-D glasses so that we can see something. I took mine off a few
times and generally enjoyed the film as much or more during those times.
Looking through the cheap red/green glasses is rather like trying to enjoy the
view through a car with a dirty windshield.
There was one line in the show that did resonate with the parents in our
audience, all of whom laughed knowingly. "Once plugged into the game," one of
the characters remarks, "the parents won't be able to get their kids'
attention."
Do the 3-D effects ever add to the film's enjoyment? Never, but they do
detract in almost every scene.
SPY KIDS 3-D: GAME OVER runs 1:25. It is rated PG for "action sequences and
peril" and would be acceptable for all ages.
My son Jeffrey, age 14, gave the picture ** 1/2, complaining that the film
never lived up to its potential and that the 3-D was awful. He enjoyed the
movie but was frustrated by it.
The film is playing in nationwide release now in the United States. In the
Silicon Valley, it is showing at the AMC theaters, the Century theaters and the
Camera Cinemas.
Web: http://www.InternetReviews.com
Email: Steve....@InternetReviews.com
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Josh Gilchrist
1/2
STARRING: Daryl Sabara, Ricardo Montalban, Sylvester Stallone, Alexa Vega,
Selma Hayek
DIRECTED AND WRITTEN BY Robert Rodriguez
89 MINUTES
MPAA RATING PG for action sequences and peril
Robert Rodriguez's imagination went into overdrive with the "Spy Kids"
franchise. Here was a well respected filmmaker who was putting his career on
hold to create something out of the ordinary, a family film franchise. In my
review of the original "Spy Kids" back in March of 2001, I praised the film
for strengthening creativity in children and showcasing a great moral about
the
importance of family.
The third, and supposedly the final, film in the franchise, "Spy Kids 3-D:
Game Over" is now in theaters, complete with it's own gimmick, the first
major 3-D release in twenty years. This automatically made me apprehensive.
I'm a fan of 3-D films but I the problem was that the film needed this kind
of a gimmick to hook an audience. Once an example of creativity, "Spy
Kids" has now run out of ideas and needs a ploy to keep it alive.
Also gone is the focus on family, the focus now is almost entirely on the
adventures of young Juni (Daryl Sabara), recruited by the spy agency to rescue
his sister Carmen (Alexa Vega) from inside a video game titled 'Game
Over.' The game has been devised by the Toymaker (Sylvestor Stallone, hamming
it up in three different roles) who plans to use the game to take over the
world. The kids who play the game will never escape, therefore Juni has only
12
hours to rescue his sister and stop the children of the world from playing it.
The film is lackluster because most of the stars of the other two films are
back, but only in bit parts. Antonio Banderas is back as the father but is
onscreen for about five minutes. The character the film concentrates upon most
is the least appealing of the bunch. Juni is neither interesting nor confident
enough to make a good hero.
I did take solace in the fact that Ricardo Montalban's character of
Grandfather is on full display. This is the only honest performance in the
film, brimming with wit and humor. Sadly, that's the only wit and humor in
the entire film.
Are the 3-D effects impressive? Not really. I have fond memories of watching
cheesy films like "The Mask," the 1961 film with Paul Stevens not the Jim
Carrey film. The problem is that the technology of 3-D hasn't improved.
I've seen older 3-D films which used the gimmick better than this film. To
add insult to injury, the film concentrates on using images that will benefit
from this lackluster 3-D imagery. That's antithetical of creativity and ideas
are squandered.
Is the film fun? Yes, for children I'm positive it is. There are even enough
parts to make parents laugh. But, when you think of the children, what are
they
taking away from this film? It's depressing to see that one of the few
franchises built on teaching lessons is now just a summer popcorn movie.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
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Rose 'Bams' Cooper
SPY KIDS 3-D: GAME OVER (2003)
Rated PG; running time 85 minutes
Studio: Dimension Films
Genre: Family/Adventure
Seen at: Eastwood Neighborhood Cinema Group (Lansing, Michigan)
Official site: http://www.spykids.com/
IMDB site: http://us.imdb.com/Details?0338459
Written by: Robert Rodriguez
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez
Cast: Daryl Sabara, Ricardo Montalban, Sylvester Stallone,
Courtney Jines, Robert Vito, Ryan Pinkston, Bobby Edner,
Salma Hayek, Mike Judge --
-- with brief cameos by Alexa Vega, Emily Osment, George Clooney,
Antonio Banderas, Carla Gugino, Matthew O'Leary, Alan Cumming,
Steve Buscemi, Bill Paxton, Holland Taylor, Danny Trejo,
Cheech Marin, Tony Shalhoub
Review Copyright Rose Cooper, 2003
Review URL:
http://www.3blackchicks.com/2003reviews/bamsspykids3.html
I suppose there's one good thing about SPY KIDS 3-D: GAME OVER: with
the way the "kids" have grown over the past few years, it's unlikely
that there will be a SPY KIDS 4.
THE STORY (WARNING: **spoilers contained below**)
Juni Cortez (Daryl Sabara) decided he no longer wanted to be a Spy
Kid; he hung up his OCC ID and went into business for himself as a
small-time gumshoe. But just when he thought he was out, they pull
him back in...when OSS Agents Cesca (Salma Hayek) and Donnagon Giggles
(Mike Judge), and President Devlin (George Clooney) tell Juni that OSS
needs him to become an agent again. When Juni resists, they tell him
the one thing that would make him go back: his sister, Agent Carmen
Cortez (Alexa Vega) is in danger.
On assignment to stop the Evil Toymaker (Sylvester Stallone) from
fulfilling his dastardly plan to get children around the world hooked
on his new game, Game Over, so that they would no longer listen to
their parents, Carmen virtually goes into that game, getting stuck on
level four. It's up to Juni to go into the game and save Carmen and
the world, with a little help - and, competition - from Grandfather
Cortez (Ricardo Montalban), and gamesters Rez (Robert Vito), Arnold
(Ryan Pinkston), Francis (Bobby Edner), and Demetra (Courtney Jines).
THE UPSHOT
Two disclaimers before I start: 1) I'm partially blind in one eye;
this impacted greatly on the technical aspect of watching a 3-D movie.
My eyes *hurt*, to the point where I had to take the glasses off
multiple times in the long 85 minutes of this movie. And 2) I am
fully, quite painfully, aware that the SPY KIDS series in general, and
SPY KIDS 3-D: GAME OVER specifically, are "children's movies". As
such, the target audience will likely love it, if only because of the
gee-whiz factor of the 3-D glasses (I'm 40, and I can't remember the
last 3-D movie I've seen; it has to be quite exciting for the kidlets
to have their shot at 3-D in this day and age). But get this: when I
turned around during the many breaks I had to take, I noticed many of
the kids looking around the room, bored; and two of the kids in the
row with me, were snoring.
I was deeply disappointed with SPY KIDS 3-D. I remembered enjoying
SPY KIDS 2, and thought this time around would be no different. Boy,
was I ever wrong. To check myself, I went back and re-read my review
of SPY KIDS 2; it hasn't been that long ago since that movie came out,
so why did the 3-D version turn me off so? And therein lies the
answer: the 3-D dealie really, *really*, pissed me off. And not just
because it really, *really*, hurt my eyes. It irritated my Inner
Child, too.
The beauty of SPY KIDS 2, for me, was in its unassuming wit and charm,
in the way it reflected creator Robert Rodriguez's vision without that
stereotypes, and that it celebrated real, honest-to-goodness family
values [no, not the ones in those empty slogans touted by political
pimps on the Left and the Right. The only way those nitwits would
know Family Values is if it walked up and offered them a bribe]. SPY
KIDS 3-D, on the other hand, seemed less interested in its story and
more interested in the techie stuff. And let me tell ya, it suffered
on both ends.
Disclaimers aside, the 3-D looked *awful* when paired with Rodriguez's
digitized effects. Sure, the first time nuts and bolts looked like
they were flying right in front of your eyes, was cute; but seeing the
characters reach out and juuuuust miss grabbing the objects that they
went on to manipulate, for want of Cool! 3-D! Action!, got real
tiresome, real quick.
But even more than that, the 3-D was an unnecessary distraction, a way
to waste roughly 55 minutes of an 85 minute movie, so that older
viewers wouldn't realize that, hey, there's no real story here! Only,
many of us realized exactly that. Right about the time we realized
that most of the characters that inhabited the words of SPY KIDS 1 and
2, would have what amounted to little more than a cameo in this third
outing. So much for "family values". There were small pockets of
frivolity, sprinkled here and there (a classic bit provided by Ricardo
"Corinthan Leather" Montalban had the adults in the audience
chuckling), pockets which almost overcame the tragedy of casting
Sylvester Stallone to play any role in which he had to utter more than
three words at a time.
I'll put it this way: when I watched a similarly-gimmicky movie called
MEMENTO, I left the theater wondering if the movie would work well the
"right" way. I left SPY KIDS 3-D not caring if I ever saw it again -
with or without 3-D glasses. Though now I wonder if those glasses
will improve on some of the other crappy movies I've had to sit
through lately.
BAMMER'S BOTTOM LINE
"Game over" is right. This flick sucked all the fun right out of the
series.
SPY KIDS 3-D: GAME OVER rating: flashing redlight
Rose "Bams" Cooper
Webchick and Editor,
3BlackChicks Review
Entertainment Reviews With Flava!
Copyright Rose Cooper, 2003
EMAIL: ba...@3blackchicks.com
http://www.3blackchicks.com/
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