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LBS humour, more! gravy!!

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g.daniels

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Nov 26, 2003, 12:19:58 PM11/26/03
to
You forgot the spacers..?
You forgot the cranberry sauce!!!!
"Well, you need a new bike?
I have ahů (swell!!)
we carry... (terrific)
Well, it looks likeů(gonorhea)
You ride an 8 speedů? (sneers)
"our customers rideů
We haven't seen one of them in years. Pisa junk. (they and you
know who they are.had a well heeled dude in a few days ago
just like yourn)
Nope the factory burned down and there's nomore parts.
What you need is aů
Younowhat?>? what you need isaů. Roadburner 4!!!!! Joe turn the spot
on the
Roadburner, aaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh itsa beauty!!!!!
That chain doesn't work on your bikeů(but the one for $15 more works
good
and they are overstocked)
oh, I'm sorry its $125 not $25 my little sister made an error(having
driven 85 miles
for the little sucker)
Now why would you do thatů (duh surprise caws you bena doin it
forů15+ hey is
this earth???)no but if your lucky you'll make it back before
dinner)
No, those parts don't fit togetherů (been on the bike 12 years,
right?)
That's not possible. Our customersů
Why would anyone want a 135mm axle?
no were all outa Conti TT but i have ONE expletive deleted left in
stock. and its the only 27" in the...(quadrant)
We don't carry it. Our customersů
Naw our customers.
We don't do that. (give him another ten, he lick yourů)
Let me ask Joeů (he's in the back: a) fixin lawnmowers, b)expletive
deleted,
c) is stalling you for timeů c1) until his little sister comes over
from the bank, c2) Joe's retarded, c3 he escaped!!!
why would anyone run a solid front axlů.?
oh yeah, I remember nowů(oh good, a memory)
oh yeah, I remember now (the price just doubled)
That's aůright?
No, that's a 1.25 weirgidget and yours isů (and you replaced the 1.00
3x and
no way itsa 1.25)
Well, you'll hafta leave itů (we gotta customer who needs those
antique
screws)
yeah, leave over by the door and let me show youů
It needs a complete overhaul. (you came in for a new tube)
I'm not sure?
You want what?? Never heard of it but our customersů (who are all
blind
Albinos?)
Here's nice tire!!! Our customersů (this tire is why all his
customers areů)
WE'RE NOT NASHBAR!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh yeah, you live in Carpathiaůright? Helloů?
Say, are you the guyů?
Well, its Koreanů.
We sell a lot of them.Well, you'll hafta leave itů (we gotta customer
who needs
those antique screws)

We gottum piled to the rafters.
Sure we gottum. Common down.
never heard of it
Adams rides a...
No, it has a 27" rimů.(substitute whatever yours doesn't run)
GNaw, its only been four weeks since..
Well,(knowing your bike and what you need at 15mm) wegottum in 13mm
14mm 16mm and 17mm. which one do you want??
Maybe you misunderstood. We only have them in Ti and carboncarbon from
Italy.
In fluorescent chartreuse. No black.
our customers.
Yeah but the one you want costs $75 bucks more and takes four-five
weeks to get inů
no, I PACKED IT AND THE DURA ACE CRANKSET WAS IN THERE!!

Its on backwards stupid."

Robert Strickland

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Nov 26, 2003, 2:24:24 PM11/26/03
to

> 14mm 16mm and 17mm. which one do you want??
> Maybe you misunderstood. We only have them in Ti and carboncarbon from
> Italy.
> In fluorescent chartreuse. No black.
> our customers.
> Yeah but the one you want costs $75 bucks more and takes four-five
> weeks to get in.

> no, I PACKED IT AND THE DURA ACE CRANKSET WAS IN THERE!!
>
> Its on backwards stupid."


I think he's finally lost it folks.

David Reuteler

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Nov 26, 2003, 4:33:48 PM11/26/03
to
Robert Strickland <robertst...@hotmail.com> wrote:
: I think he's finally lost it folks.

this is partly why i have no delusions of wanting to work in a bike shop.
the other is the pay. no money and you get to go insane. let it be said
i appreciate those of you who are willing to do the dirty work and risk
untold dangers (mental & otherwise). there really ought to be hazard pay.

meanwhile let's get gene back on his meds.
--
david reuteler
reut...@visi.com

Carl Fogel

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Nov 26, 2003, 5:36:30 PM11/26/03
to
"Robert Strickland" <robertst...@hotmail.com> wrote in message news:<bq2ujo$6fd$00$1...@news.t-online.com>...

Dear Robert,

Did you mean to impy that he had ever found it?

Carl Fogel

John Henderson

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Nov 26, 2003, 5:54:05 PM11/26/03
to
"Robert Strickland" wrote:

> I think he's finally lost it folks.

Perhaps I should be worried now. I found that original post
wholly comprehensible, and richly endowed with good humour.

Normally, I have to struggle with g.daniels' postings.

John


Rick Onanian

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Nov 26, 2003, 6:24:22 PM11/26/03
to
On Wed, 26 Nov 2003 20:24:24 +0100, "Robert Strickland"
<robertst...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>> In fluorescent chartreuse. No black.
>> Its on backwards stupid."
>
>I think he's finally lost it folks.

Think? Finally?
--
Rick Onanian

ant

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Nov 26, 2003, 8:52:48 PM11/26/03
to
"Robert Strickland" <robertst...@hotmail.com> wrote in message

> I think he's finally lost it folks.

frankly, i thoguht it was hilarious.

Qui si parla Campagnolo

unread,
Nov 29, 2003, 10:08:16 AM11/29/03
to
david-<< this is partly why i have no delusions of wanting to work in a bike
shop.
the other is the pay. no money and you get to go insane. >><BR><BR>

Best job in the world, worse job in the world..at the same time, being a small
retail shop owner-any retail.

Peter Chisholm
Vecchio's Bicicletteria
1833 Pearl St.
Boulder, CO, 80302
(303)440-3535
http://www.vecchios.com
"Ruote convenzionali costruite eccezionalmente bene"

g.daniels

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Dec 1, 2003, 12:13:54 PM12/1/03
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frankly, avast the gravy. a free trip to PR for de ant

no one has a few to add?

expletive deleted

the good one is the 1.25 vs 1.5 pitch(see leonard)
this conundrum leaves the shade tree mechanic in ME Anomie
wondering why me and where do we go from hear?
this is seriuous stuff and advance planning is necessary for not
ruining the next project

Rick Onanian

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Dec 1, 2003, 6:48:55 PM12/1/03
to
On 1 Dec 2003 09:13:54 -0800, data...@yahoo.com (g.daniels) wrote:
>frankly, avast the gravy. a free trip to PR for de ant

No thanks, I don't like turkey, nor do I think that small flightless
insects should go to Puerto Rico.

>no one has a few to add?

I'd like to add 3 and 6. Could I get 9 out of that?

>expletive deleted

interrogative inserted

>the good one is the 1.25 vs 1.5 pitch(see leonard)

I prefer less pitch and more fire.

>this conundrum leaves the shade tree mechanic in ME Anomie

I've never seen the guys on Shadetree Mechanic in a conundrum. I
don't even think that show is on anymore. Er...didn't it used to be
on TNN? Then TNN kept it's initials but changed Nashville to
National, then that flopped so they changed to Spike TV (and Spike
Lee sued them). That was a good show.

>wondering why me and where do we go from hear?

Wow, combining Jethro Tull, Shaggy, and the Alan Parsons Project
(which may have been some sort of UFO).
Wondering aloud/why me lord/where do we go from here...
How do we feel today/situation looking kinda bad/now that all other
children are growin' up...

>this is seriuous stuff and advance planning is necessary for not
>ruining the next project

Amen to that, brother!
--
Rick Onanian

g.daniels

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Dec 5, 2003, 11:25:13 AM12/5/03
to
time flies like an arrow
fruit flies like
a banana

i thought
it
worth
repeating.

this is cool: three LBS visits, and no i was not stoned, brought five
more witticisms all forgotten due to stress
but i forgot this one in the first instrance:

the mail order people have a bad habit of
LEAVING SOMETHING OUT!!
and then the MOP have the bad manners to whine that YOU pocketed THEIR
piece and now want THEM to send YOU another for nuthin'
for example: having odored a cassette gear cluster and a hub to go
with the customer may find NO EXPLETIVE DELETED wrench for the new
cassette.

what gives here is the MOP want another chance at bleeding the
customer one on one for yet another odor.
DESPICABLE!!

this is from the early warning system!!!

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