Epsiode capsule - 3ACV08 - That's Lobstertainment
Ostap Bender
Verrone
Directed by Bret Haarland
==============================================================================
Production code: 3ACV08 Original Airdate on FOX:
2/25/2001
==============================================================================
TV Guide synopsis:
In Hollywood, Bender lies to get a robot TV actor to finance a
comeback film
for Dr. Zoidberg's uncle, legendary star Harold Zoid (Hank Azaria).
==============================================================================
> Title sequence
==============================================================================
Opening theme promotion:
DECIPHERED FROM
CROP CIRCLES
Opening theme cartoon:
==============================================================================
> Did You Notice...
==============================================================================
... School hoverbus at the parking lot?
... Mel Gibson' head drawn exactly like on The Simpsons
... Amy, Kiff, Zapp, and Petunia, Morbo, Jar-Jar head in the jar,
Pauly Shore, Michelle and Monique at the Academy Awards?
Joe Klemm
... Zoidberg using his claws as film clappers when making the
Magnificent Three?
==============================================================================
> Voice Credits
==============================================================================
- Starring
- Billy West (Fry, Dr. Zoidberg, Prof. Farnsworth)
- Katey Sagal (Leela)
- John DiMaggio (Bender)
- Tress MacNeille (Tour Guide)
Guest Starring
- Phil Lamarr (Hermes Conrad)
- David Herman
- Special Appearance by
- Hank Azaria (Harold Zoid)
- Also Starring
- Maurice LaMarche
==============================================================================
> Movie (and other) references
==============================================================================
+ Star Trek (TV Series)
- "The Pepsi Generation" soft drink placement
+ Men In Black (Movie)
- "They call me Mr. Pibb" soft drink placement
+ Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs (Cartoon)
- Snow White and the 7Ups
+ That's Entertainment
- Episode Title {JK}
+ Harold Lloyd
- Harold Zoid {JK}
+ FDR
- Harold Zoid as a wheelchair-bound president {JK}
+ Andy Warhol
- Calculon painting in the style of the artist {JK}
+ Wallace & Gromit's A Close Shave
- A Close Shaving {FP}
+ Star Tours (the ride)
- the bus
==============================================================================
> Previous episode references
==============================================================================
==============================================================================
> Freeze frame fun
==============================================================================
A sign outside "All My Circuits" studio:
TAPING IN
PROGRESS
PLEASE
ANNOUNCE
SELF WITH
BULLHORN
LA BREA
TAR PITS
AS SEEN ON THE
TAR CHANNEL
OSCAR PARTY
NO LOSERS ADMITTED
Other headlines in DAILY VARIETY {MZ}
Fox Exex Bax Sex Pix,
Ficx Lax Crox Cox,
Stpx Sinx, Ax Pres.
==============================================================================
> Animation, continuity, and other goofs
==============================================================================
Joe Klemm
Two weeks (as hinted by how long Fry and Leela were stuck in the tar
pits), is
not enough time for a film to released, win at the Golden Globes, be
nominated
for an Oscar, and win the award (The time between nominations and the
ceremony
may change in the future, but the film would have to be eligible for
next
year's awards).
Mike Zaite
Don't forget the total lack of smog, gun toting children, and
abandoned ruins in
L.A. or the fact that the Hollywood sign is now whole again. I love
it when the
writers don't bother to watch the shows they make.
==============================================================================
> Reviews
==============================================================================
==============================================================================
> Comments and other observations
==============================================================================
Joe Klemm
The joke about Calculon winning the Golden Globe makes fun of an
infamous
incident that caused the Golden Globe Awards to be the laughing stock
of the
awards ceremony circuit for a many years. In 1982, the Best Female
Newcomer
award went to Pia Zadora for a film that was so awful, that she
didn't deserve
the award in the first place. However, through bribery by her husband
at the
time, she was able to get her hand on the award, thus proving to be a
major
embarrassment for the Hollywood Foreign Press.
The crack about Marisa Tomei refers to the 1993 Oscar ceremony. At
that
ceremony, she was the Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her role as
Joe Pesci's
girlfriend in the film My Cousin Vinny. However, there is a urban
legend going
that she wasn't the name that was in the envelope. Instead, it is
believed that
Jack Palance, the person presenting the award, ignored the name in
the envelope
and announced Tomei, who was the only American lady to be nominated
in
the Supporting Actress category that year, as the winner.
See http://www.snopes2.com/movies/actors/tomei.htm
Zikron the Insistent
There's a remark about writing being categorized as a minor technical
award. In cartoons there are two camps, writers and animators.
Currently for the Emmys(tm)(r)(c) the awards for the animated shows
are given at the technical awards which are judged by a small blue
ribbon panel and the winners are announced ahead of time. The
animators prefer this as they want to be voted by their colleagues.
The writers would rather have a larger body of the TV academy vote
for
the animated series along with the other prime time TV shows.
http://tv.zap2it.com/news/tvnewsdaily.html?15075
Also notice how Bender is an "executive producer".
In tv that's just a writer that's been around long
enough.
==============================================================================
> Quotes and Scene Summary {}
==============================================================================
% At "THE COMEDY SIMULATOR" it's the amateur nite.
%
% It's also an amateur valet parking nite. A valet guy bring a car and
crashes
% it into a lamppost.
%
% On the stage:
Robot: So I says, "Supercollider? I just met her." [Audience
laughs] And
then they built the supercollider. Thank you. You've been a
great
audience. [Leaves]
Liquid
guy: [Flows to the microphone, then gets up] Humorbot 5.0, ladies
and
gentlemen. Our next standup's a veteran of four comedy
traffic
schools. Give it way up for Bobcat Zoidberg. [All cheer]
Zoidberg: [Gets up on the stage] Earth, what a planet. On Earth you
enjoy
eating a tasty clam. On my planet, clams enjoy eating a
tasty you.
[Audience is silent] Maybe I'm not yelling loud enough.
[Louder] On
Earth, everybody is always looking for a giant squid. On my
planet... [Gets hit by a tomato in the face. He gladly eats
it]
Bender: [Holding a spoon] Reload. [Leela puts another tomato in the
spoon,
Bender launches it]
Zoidberg: So these three parasitic worms bore into a human's head...
[Audience
murmurs] and they walk up to the bar and then... [A hook
shows up on
the right side of the stage] Uh-oh. Wait. Stop. I've got
more.
% The hook extends towards Zoidberg, but he dodges it. Another hook
appears
% from the left and knocks him of the head. Audience applauds.
%
% Back at Planet Express.
Zoidberg: My whole life I worked on that act, and they hated it.
Hermes: You're a crazy, penniless lobster doctor. No combination of
you
should be a comedian.
Zoidberg: But comedy is in my valves. My Uncle Harold was a big
Hollywood star
back in the era of silent holograms.
Leela: Your uncle was Harold Zoid?
Zoidberg: This I cannot deny.
Prof.: Why, I've been a Harold Zoid fan since back when my hips
were made
of bone. As it happens, I still have some of my original
78s.
% Takes out a large vinyl-like disk with "78 Million RPM HoloDisk"
written on
% it. He blows dust off of it and puts it on a player, which resembles
a
% gramophone. The film titled "CLOSE SHAVING", styled as old silent
movie
% starts.
%
% A lobster in a barbershop is sharpening his razor. A man comes in
and asks
% for "Your finest trim, please". He sits down on the chair and takes
off his
% hat. The lobster gradually cuts his moustache with his claws to
naught.
% The man jumps up off the seat, angrily points at the lobster,
followed by
% a full screen saying titles "You are a buffoon. Now cut my beard."
The
% lobster foams his chin, then cuts off his had with one swift move.
The head
% rolls out the door. The lobster grabs the hat, waves it in the air.
"Sir,
% you forgot your hat!" then appears. THE END. Buy Moxie.
%
% Planet Express crew laughs heartily.
Hermes: You're right, Crabby. He's a hell of a lot funnier than you
could
ever be.
Zoidberg: Maybe so but, perhaps if I wrote him and asked for a few
hundred
pointers...
% At Zoidberg office.
Zoidberg: This letter has This letter has so I'm writing it in my own
ink.
% He reaches inside his coat, squishing sound is heard. He takes out a
ink-pot ]
% full of ink and starts writing.
Zoidberg: [Writes] "Dear Uncle Zoid. Greetings from your long-lost
nephew.
Norm and Sam and Sadie's boy, remember? [Cut to his uncle
reading
the letter at the retirement home] Now I am the most
important
doctor at the delivery company where I work. But sadly, my
life is
bereft of laughter. I beg of you, Mr. Funny Uncle, teach me
the
comedy business. Sincerely, Zoidberg."
Zoid: Oy, isn't that nice he took the time?
Old lady: [Walks by] What's that scribbly-gook?
Zoid: This is a fan letter from my rich doctor nephew who just
might be my
ticket out of this flophouse, he might. [Old lady makes a
slow
mocking noise and starts as slowly walking away]
Zoid: Yeah, you better run.
% Zoid picks up an ink-pot and fills it with his own ink. He then
starts
% writing a reply.
Zoid: [Writing] Dear Rich Doctor Nephew. I can help you be funny.
The
first funny thing you must do is put all your money in the
form of a
cashier's check and come to Hollywood. [Switch to Zoidberg
reading
the reply] Sincerely, Harold Zoid. P.S. Cashier's check.
Zoidberg: Did you hear that? I'm going to Hollywood.
% Planet express ship flies over desert, and reaches LA, passing
though the
% O in HOLLYWOOD. It lands on a parking lot and parks in a space
designated
% a "compact", shoving aside the two cars on the sides. Leela puts a
steering
% wheel lock on the steering wheel of the ship, which extends all the
way to
% the ceiling and the floor.
%
% Later. The board the Star Tours bus. There's a "NOTE: BUS DOES NOT
LEAVE
% EARTH" on the side of the bus.
Guide: Welcome to Hollywood. I must warn you there's no refund if
you get
discovered and leave the tour. [Laughs] I'm just kidding.
That never
happens. Now, to your right, you'll see 30th Century Fox
Studios. Fox
uses those searchlights to blind pilots then film the
resulting
plane crashes. [We see that scheme in action]
Bender: [Takes a picture] Neat.
Guide: Ahead, you'll see the home of Mel Gibson star of the hit
film
BRAVEHEAD. [Mel Gibson's head in the jar pokes out of the
door of
a tiny house, then shuts the door] And do we have any fans
of
Calculon star of the robot soap opera, ALL MY CIRCUITS?
Bender: Oh, I am! [Disconnects one of his hands and raises it with
the
other] Me. Bender is.
Guide: Then you'll want to get a close look at his luxury Bel-Air
home.
Bender: Yes, I will. Yup!
% Jumps off the bus, runs through the green fence to the door of the
house. He
% ring the bell, Calculon opens.
Calculon: Are you my new hot water heater?
Bender: No, I'm Bender. We met once, remember?
Calculon: Absolutely not.
Bender: Come on. Don't you remember how much I was bugging you?
Don't you?
'Cause it was a lot. You remember, right?
Calculon: Look, I'm programmed to be very busy. Unless you can heat
water to
212 degrees I'm not interested. [Slams the door]
% Bender rings the bell again.
Calculon: Have you got an extra "Goto 10" line? I said I don't need a
Bender.
Bender: Bender? That was the other guy. My name's Boiler.
% In the shower.
Calculon: Nice work, Boiler.
Bender: [Pouring water on him from his hand] Thanks. Hey, call me
Bender.
% At the intersection of Rodeo Drive and Wilshire Boulevard. Leela,
Fry and
% Zoidberg are still on the Tour bus, passing the EBOLA restaurant.
Zoidberg: That's where I'm meeting Uncle Zoid for lunch to discuss my
Hollywood dreams. Next time you see me, don't be surprised
if I've
eaten. [Jumps off the bus and runs into the restaurant]
% In the restaurant. Zoidberg runs in and see Zoid at the table.
Zoidberg: Uncle Zoid, you're looking young enough to be thrown back.
Zoid: Rich nephew. Come over here and give your uncle a nice big
meal.
% They hug, then sit down.
Zoid: So, here we are, a still-famous film comedian...
Zoidberg: ...and a rich, respected doctor with many surviving
patients.
Zoid: Eating real food in a restaurant as we both often do. So,
you want
to be a comedian, is it?
Zoidberg: It's my lifelong dream.
Zoid: Well, that dream dies now! You're unfunny and untalented.
That's why
you're perfect for drama.
Zoidberg: Hmm... serious drama. Perhaps it is time to give up comedy.
% A passing waiter slips up and drops a plate of spagetti on his head.
% Everyone laughs.
Zoid: I'm putting together a big drama picture right now, as we
speak. The
script is dynamite! I know, because I wrote it myself. And
with me
directing and starring I'll be back on top after 50
miserable
years... [Zoidbergs looks at him surprised] of fame.
Zoidberg: Ah, fame. Where do I come in?
Zoid: This fame film has a juicy part for you if you completely
finance it
with your doctor money. So, are you in?
Zoidberg: Uh, okay. How much do I have to invest?
Zoid: Oh, not much, not much. A million dollars. [Zoidberg shoots
water
out of his head, several places at once] Then it's settled.
Another
blockbuster Hollywood deal.
Waiter: What can I get you gentlemen?
Zoidberg: Is bread free?
Waiter: Yeah.
Zoidberg: We'll split an order.
% [End of Act One. Act Time: Running Time:]
% At the parking lot, inside the ship. Zoidberg weeps.
Bender: [Comes in] What's with Monstro?
Fry: He promised he'd give his Uncle Zoid a million bucks to make
a
movie.
Zoidberg: I've only been here a day and already I'm a Hollywood phony.
Bender: Well, perhaps I could call on TV's Calculon to help now that
I'm in
showbiz.
Fry: Since when have you been in the biz?
Bender: Long enough, little man. Long enough. [Water shoots out of
his hand,
he turns it like a faucet, the flow cuts off]
% At Hollywood. Camera passes "Universal Studios", then "PARALLEL
UNIVERSAL
% STUDIOS", which shimmers unevenly.
%
% Planet express crew reaches the "All My Circuits" studio.
% Calculon is in makeup.
Bender: Calculon, as your hot water heater I would be remiss if I
didn't
bring you scripts that could make you an international film
star.
Calculon: Of course. Tell me about the project.
Zoidberg: It's a movie.
Calculon: Interesting. Tell me more.
Bender: Get this. For a scant $1 million investment you can be the
star.
Calculon: And?
Bender: And, uh, I guarantee it'll win you an Oscar.
Calculon: An Oscar, you say? That would get me out of this festering
rats'
nest called television once and for all. Let me see the
script.
[Zoidberg gives him the script] No. No, I don't like the
font. Wait.
Harold Zoid? Was this written by THE Harold Zoid?
Zoidberg: Written and xeroxed.
Calculon: Good heavens, a chance to work with the legendary Harold
Zoid. He's
one of my great idols. And you say you can guarantee me the
Oscar?
Bender: I can guarantee you anything you want.
Calculon: Then I'll do it.
Zoidberg: Hooray!
Bender: Here's your checkbook. [Hands Calculon his checkbook, which
he had
in his compartment]
% At the filming.
Calculon: Ladies and gentlemen, I give you our director, the legendary
Harold
Zoid. [Everyone applauds]
Zoid: Thank you. A more classic movie plot there isn't. A son who
does not
want to follow in his father's business and that business is
being
president of Earth, no less. The son, as it happens, is vice
president.
Bender: That plot makes perfect sense... wink, wink.
Zoidberg: Bender, you said, "wink, wink" out loud.
Bender: No, I didn't. Raised middle finger.
% Filming starts.
Zoid: Now, remember - and I can't stress this enough - this is a
talkie so
I want the full gamut of emotions from every actor in every
scene.
Zoidberg: The Magnificent Three, scene one, take one.
Zoid: And... action.
Calculon: Take back your gilded pen, Father. Signing bills into law
was always
your dream, not mine.
Zoid: Cut! Cut! Cut it! Poi! I said this is a talkie, damn it.
You've got
to emote more. And you extras, wave your arms and make
faces. What
is this? A morgue?
% Later.
Zoidberg: The Magnificent Three, scene ten, take 95.
Zoid: Action. And I mean circus-grade action.
Calculon: [In unnaturally dramatic tone] Sir, I call upon you not as a
president but as a father! [Weeps. Extras runs and yells on
the
background]
Zoid: Cut! Cut! Cut it! [To Calculon] Would you show a little
emotion?
[To everyone] People, people, please. Just because it's a
dramatic
scene doesn't mean you can't do a little comedy in the
background.
Throw a pie or two, for God's sake.
% New scene.
% Waving flag that has a picture of White House on it. Drum roll.
Extras
% run out, throwing pies and laughing hysterically. Switch to the
scene on
% the roof of White House. Thunder rolls. Calculon screams, then
cries.
Zoid: Cut! Cut it! [To Calculon] Look, it's all right, kid. You'll
learn.
We'll get it in editing. All right, that's a wrap,
everybody. I'm
going to see you all at the premiere which, by the way, when
is?
Zoidberg: Well, editing is a long and expensive process but we spent
all the
money on pies so it'll be ready Friday.
% The Mangificient Three Premiere.
Bender: Nice turnout, Calculon. That Oscar's practically on you
mantel.
Calculon: I just pray they like me half as much as I do.
% The film starts. Shot of White House. Typing appears at the bottom
of the
% screen: White House, Washington D.D., then changing to Washington
D.C.
% At the oval office.
Calculon: I agreed to be your vice president but I never agreed to be
your
son.
% Splashes a glass of water into Zoid's face, then walks out. Zoidberg
in
% Navy uniform opens the door for him.
Calculon: Thank you, Lieutenant Smith.
Zoidberg: Good morning, Mr. Vice President.
% Cut to Leela and Fry looking for parking.
Fry: Leela, we're missing the premiere. My only goal in life is
to attend
a Hollywood shindig. Just pay the valet the two bucks.
Leela: No. It's the principle of the thing. Besides, I think I see
a
parking lot up ahead.
% She lands in LA BREA TAR PITS, the ship sinks in tar. They both
scream.
% Back to the preniere. The scene on the roof of White House.
Calculon: Father, I have asked you to join me on the White House roof
so we
could have a heart-to-heart talk. I will NEVER follow in
your
footsteps. HERE is my resignation as vice president.
Zoid: NO. [Crumples his resignation] My son will not SHAME me like
this. I
would sooner DIE, I would.
Calculon: Father! The ledge!
Zoid: [Rolls to the edge on the wheelchair and falls off] Oy!
Calculon: Oh...
Zoidberg: [Pokes his head out of the hatch] The president is dead.
Congratulations, Mr. President.
Calculon: No! [Raises his hand, camera moves away]
% The end. "Executive Producer: BENDER" appears on the screen.
Bender: Wha-hoo! Yeah! He's a visionary! [Applauds]
Calculon: [Spins his head 360] Everyone walked out. They hated it.
I've seen
plagues that had better opening nights than this. You said
that
Oscar was practically on my mantel.
Bender: Now you know why I used the qualifier "practically".
Calculon: You listen to me. I'm out a million bucks here. You get me
that
Oscar, or you're dead. You and these sniveling lobsters.
Dead! You
hear me?! Dead!
% Bender and Zoidberg hug each other and shiver.
Zoid: Oy! NOW he emotes.
% [End of Act Two. Act Time: Running Time:]
% "DAILY VARIETY" headline "OSC NOMS ANNOUNCED" with sub headline
"Also, Oscar
% Nominations Announced". Frame shifts and we see Calculon reading
this paper.
Calculon: 400 categories, and not a single nomination for me. [Throws
the
paper]
Zoidberg: But you won this Golden Globe.
Calculon: Piffle. That's the Emmy of movie awards. I told you I want
an Oscar.
Bender: Then maybe you should act better.
Calculon: The Oscar isn't about acting. It's about earning the respect
and
admiration of the creative community.
Zoid: How about we rig the awards?
Calculon: That's fine, too.
% Leela and Fry at the bottom of the tar pit. Leela tries to give the
ship
% some gas. The engine struggles.
Leela: It's no use. The tar is too thick. Plus, I think I've
flooded it.
Fry: Well, we've missed the premiere and we're going to die.
Might as
well enjoy the sights. [Looks out the window at the
blackness of
tar. Suddenly a skeleton floats by] Oh, my God. Sylvester
Stallone.
% At FINAL CURTAIN Old Actors' Home.
Zoidberg: This is where you live? I thought you were a big-shot
Hollywood
movie star.
Zoid: No, I'm not. I'm an even bigger liar than you. My career
went down
the tubes the day they invented Smell-O-Vision.
Bender: Calculon's going to kill us for sure. And it's all everybody
else's
fault.
Zoid: Oy. All I wanted was for people to think of me one last
time before
I die.
Zoidberg: What are you talking about, Uncle? Everybody remembers
Harold Zoid.
Zoid: As a pathetic has-been, they remember me. As a forgotten
relic, they
remember me. Bah! It's better to die now.
Zoidberg: No. This is one death Dr. Zoidberg won't be responsible for.
Zoidberg away. [Slowly and inaptly walks out the room]
% At the Academy Awards. Stars arrive.
Joan
Rivers: Hi. I'm Joan Rivers' head. I tell you, I've had so many
facelifts
they finally lifted it right off my body. It's true. It's
true. Oh!
Oh, oh! Here comes Jack Nicholson's DNA reconstituted in a
gorilla
body.
% A gorilla looking like Nicholson gets out of the car with a girl on
each arm.
%
% Meanwhile, at the back door. Bender rolls the cart.
Bender: Catering.
% The guard pick us the cover, revealing Zoidberg on a dish.
Guard: Eww. Ugh. Ahh. [Pinches his nose. Waves them in]
% Back at the front.
Joan
Rivers: Oh, and here's washed-up actor what's-his-name, Harold Zoid.
Are you
presenting one of those tacky honorary awards or just
getting one?
Zoid: I'm a sheet-filler, Joan's head. My only marketable skill is
to
occupy space.
% Inside.
Calculon: [To Zoid] You know, the second I don't win that award you're
cat
food. Right, Boxy? [Boxy beeps]
Announcer: And now the host the 1074th Academy Awards Billy Crystal!
% A golden statue with Billy Crystal's head in the jar on top is on
the stage.
Crystal: Now I know how a Pez dispenser feels. [All laugh. Nicholson
gorilla
grunts, and thumps itself on the chest] Oh, you like that
one, Jack?
[Imitates grunting]
% The statue transport Billy Crystal's head to the podium, then folds
its
% hands.
Cyrstal: All right. We're already one hour behind. [Gorilla grunts]
Our first
award tonight Best Cinematography in a Nonvisible
Spectrum...
% At the bottom of the tar pits.
Fry: It's been two weeks. You want to play tic-tac-toe again
before we
eat our shoes?
Leela: No. I always knew I'd die at the bottom of a pit, but a pit
full of
tar?
% Something hits the hull of the ship. The ship tilts.
Fry: What was that? A tar dolphin? Or a tar SHARK?
Leela: It's some kind of hollow tube devoid of human life. [Gasps]
The Los
Angeles Subway. We can blast our way in and escape.
Fry: All right, but I still feel like having a shoe.
% Takes off his shoe and starts gnawing on it. Leela steps on the gas
pedal.
%
% Back at the academy awards. Backstage.
Zoidberg: What category are they on?
Bender: They're giving out the minor technical awards. I think
they're up to
Writing.
Zoidberg: That just leaves Best Soft Drink Product Placement and then
Best
Actor. We don't have much time.
Crystal: And the nominees for Best Soft Drink Product Placement
are...
Slum
machine: Star Trek, the Pepsi Generation...[a shot of a Vulcan
holding a
can of Pepsi] They call me Mr. Pibb [a shot of a can of Mr.
Pibb
and a Man In Black] and Snow White and the 7Ups. [Shot of
Snow White
drinking 7Up from a straw]
Bender: [Taps into the announcing system] And now, to present the
award for
Best Actor a bit player in the flop movie "The Magnificent
Three"
Dr. Zoidberg.
% Zoidberg walks out on the stage, takes the Billy Crystal jar and
dumps
% him out. Crow applauds.
Calculon: Okay, Boxy, keep your prong on the trigger. [Boxy jams a gun
in
Zoid's ribs. Er.. rib equivalents]
Zoidberg: And the nominees for Best Actor are... Sir Lawrence [Weird
trilling] in "The merchant of Venus", Hivemind Gamma 7-X in
"Bikini
Party Summer" The Soda Machine Robot in "Bikini Party
Summer", Mark
Jones in "How beige Was my Jacket?" and, instead of the
fifth guy,
Calculon for his powerhouse performance in "The Magnificent
Three".
Crowd: [Surprised murmur] Calculon?
Assistant
backstage: Uh-oh. He read the wrong name.
Another
Assistant: Shh. Just play along like they did for Marisa Tomei.
Zoid: Hooray! I won't be murdered. I'll live another day. Another
day
of... pathetic, forgotten misery.
Zoidberg: [Cuts open the envelope. Drum roll] And the winner is... And
the
winner, instead of any of the nominees is the legendary
Harold Zoid!
Zoid: Oh. Oh... [Runs to the stage] Oh... ho, ho. [Hugs Zoidberg]
Thank
you. Thank you so much. You know, through all my ups and
downs I
always thought the most important thing in life was to win
an Oscar.
But tonight I realize what's really important is to win TWO
Oscars.
Ha! Ha! I'm kidding. I'm kidding. What really matters in
life is
that people care about you whether it's a whole crowd or
just one
diehard fan.
Crowd: Ah... [Applause. Nicholson gorilla grunts, hanging from the
chandelier]
% Later, at the Oscar Party.
Zoid: Thank you, Nephew. [Kisses the Oscar] Now I can die happy.
Ten
seconds from now when Calculon kills us.
Calculon: [Comes up to their table] Harold Zoid?
Bender: Hit the deck! [Bender and Zoidberg hide under the table]
Calculon: Where's that Oscar?
Zoid: Here. Enjoy. What are you getting upset? It's slightly less
fraudulent for you to have it.
Calculon: Yes. Yes, it's a real beauty. Someday I hope to win one of
my own.
Bender: Then you're not going to kill us, Your Majesty?
Calculon: Nay. I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him
to death
with his own Oscar. [Crowd cheers]
% Ground starts shaking.
Zoidberg: Earthquake!
Bender: Hit the deck! [He and Zoidberg hide under the table]
Zoid: Let the earth quake. I've got somebody's Oscar! [Holds it
up]
% Outside the restaurant Planet Express ship jumps out of the ground,
all
% covered in tar and stops right before the restaurant. Leela and Fry
come
% out.
Fry: We made it. I'm at a Hollywood party.
Waiter: I'm sorry, sir. This is a private... Oh, pardon me. I see
you're
with Mr. Stallone. [Stallone skeleton is stuck to Fry's leg]
% He lets them in. Camera moves away Showing a view of LA.
% [End of Act Three. Act Time: Running Time:]
==============================================================================
> Contributors
==============================================================================
{} Me
{JK} Joe Klemm
{MZ} Mike Zaite
{FP} Fen Phen
{ZtI} Zikron the Insistent
Robert J. Muldoon
film.
I also noticed that Hollywood and Vine is a residential area in the year
3000. I'm wondering if the streets have been renamed, or Graumann's was
moved (or rebuilt) because it's just a couple of blocks from this corner in
Downtown Hollywood, if I remember correctly. And you can see the El Capitan
in the background (wonder if Disney still owns it). And it's quite a walk
from the La Brea Tar Pits on Wilshire to Graumann's Chinese (probably three
to five miles). And I seriously doubt that the subway was built under the
tarpits. The sewer lines nearby get flooded with tar. The subway wouldn't
have a chance.
<< Don't forget the total lack of smog, gun toting children, and abandoned
ruins in L.A. or the fact that the Hollywood sign is now whole again. I love
it when the writers don't bother to watch the shows they make. >>
That's like Downtown LA and the suburbs (Inglewood, Downey, etc) compared to
Hollywood even TODAY! And when you get into Beverly and Hollywood Hills and
compare it to those.... The fact that all these different places are part
of the same city is astounding. And the smog is lesser in Hollywood, as
you're higher up.
--
Sincerely,
Robert J. Muldoon
o--(|8[#]
"Brian paid me twenty bucks to sit in this chair and not say a word....
oops."
http://www.geocities.com/bolognaornot
S1.3 OFF+++ NED+++# ABE+++ FRI+++># CBG+++# BOB+++ ASS--- f++++ s-l+++
ats--- pso $+++ MG20, 7G09, 9F15, 2F13, 3F24, 3G01, 4F10, BABF07,
AABF22----- M1984
Larry
<nob...@replay.net> wrote:
> And I seriously doubt that the subway was built under the
>tarpits. The sewer lines nearby get flooded with tar. The subway wouldn't
>have a chance.
I was in that neighborhood last summer and there is a new major subway
station within a block of the Chinese Theater. Beyond that, I don't
really know the area. We were staying in a hotel around the corner and
I got to walk around there for a while. They were building the new
academy awards building right across the street.
--Larry
Michael Zaite
"Robert J. Muldoon" <nob...@replay.net> wrote in message
news:GtVl7.161601$oh1.68...@news2.rdc2.tx.home.com...
> I'm pretty sure that "They Call Me Mister Pibb" was a reference to an
older
> film.
I though it was a little double Joke. Mr. Pibb being a soda and the song
"They Call Me Mello Yellow" Mellow Yellow also being a soft drink now.
--
Mike Zaite ICQ:25758172
CO-LA-MAKES-THE-GOOD-TIMES-ROLL-HAVE-A-PEA-NUT.
Larry
<za...@earthlink.net> wrote:
>
>
>I though it was a little double Joke. Mr. Pibb being a soda and the song
>"They Call Me Mello Yellow" Mellow Yellow also being a soft drink now.
That would make it a triple joke. There was a movie called "They Call
Me Mr Tibbs".
http://mrshowbiz.go.com/movies/reviews/TheyCallMeMrTibbs_1970/review.html
--Larry
David Gray
> Opening theme promotion:
>
> DECIPHERED FROM
> CROP CIRCLES
>
> Opening theme cartoon:
>
Warner Brothers, "Box Car Blues", 1930.
The character on top of the boxcar is Bosko.
OmegaMan
>
> I'm pretty sure that "They Call Me Mister Pibb" was a reference to an older
> film.
In the movie "In the Heat of the Night", Sidney Poitier plays a police detective
from up north who is visiting down south. The old southern sheriff makes some
derogatory comment about who is he. Sidney responds "They call me Mr. Tibbs."
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OmegaMan
>
> On Fri, 07 Sep 2001 05:38:25 GMT, "Michael Zaite"
> <za...@earthlink.net> wrote:
>
> >
> >
> >I though it was a little double Joke. Mr. Pibb being a soda and the song
> >"They Call Me Mello Yellow" Mellow Yellow also being a soft drink now.
>
> That would make it a triple joke. There was a movie called "They Call
> Me Mr Tibbs".
That was a sequel to "In the Heat of the Night", where Sidney Poitier
first used that line.
Nadimo Nyth
and apparently a remake over here http://us.imdb.com/Title?0117889
Nyth
8)
"Larry" <residen...@bigfoot.com> wrote in message
news:3b987e2d...@news1.rdc1.bc.home.com...
Robert J. Muldoon
station within a block of the Chinese Theater. Beyond that, I don't really
know the area. We were staying in a hotel around the corner and I got to
walk around there for a while. They were building the new academy awards
building right across the street. >>
The subway station was finished (as of mid-July). It's at Hollywood and
Highland, and the complex being built is of the same name. Really cool
architecture, like La Defense near Paris (like a giant frame). In fact, if
you stand in front of the box office of the El Capitan and look Northeast,
the "Hollywood" sign is perfectly centered in the frame.
luther
of the Night".
There is a famous line in the movie where he says "They call me Mr. Tibbs."
Two sequels were made, the second may have been called Mr. Tibbs but I am
not sure. Good movie, BTW.
"Robert J. Muldoon" <nob...@replay.net> wrote in message
news:GtVl7.161601$oh1.68...@news2.rdc2.tx.home.com...
= "