FanFic - DP/UF - Crossroads [19]

[MegaZone]

--------------------------------------------------------------NINETEEN

"`Son, I am able,' she said, `though you scare me.' `Watch,'
said I, `beloved,' I said, 'Watch me scare you though.' Said she,
`Able am I, son.'"
--They Might Be Giants

"So, it really has nothing to do with Lord Fahrvergnugen,"
Vaughn was saying. "According to the books I found in the library on
Gallifrey, you're the ultimate evil," point at Zoner, "you're the mech
guy," point at ReRob, then pointing at Ben "and it's all your fault!
Mucking up the Universe with some kind of cosmic power. The only
question I can't figure out right now is where that power came from."
"You're close, my friend, very close," said a voice from the
turbolift door. Everyone on the bridge whirled--and froze in their
tracks. For through that door were walking another Vaughn, a tall,
thin, hawk-nosed man in a deerstalker cape and hat, and another
Gryphon, MegaZone, and ReRob.
"Bha???" said the first Vaughn, who, for purposes of
identification, we will henceforth refer to as "Reality" in order to
distinguish him from the other, hereon referred to as "Vaughn".
"Bha???" said Vaughn in reply. He had been expecting
something odd, but this? This was a bit much.
"Um," said the second MegaZone, who will henceforth be known
as Zoner-2.
"Er," added ReRob-2.
"Bill," finished Gryphon-2, "Strange things are afoot at the
Circle K."
"What the fuck?" Kei added, eloquently.
"Ditto," ReRob piled on.
Zoner jumped on the bandwagon with "Why am I not surprised?"
"Yaaay, crosstime," said Gryphon.
"Oh, my..." Yuri muttered.
"I can tell you all have a thousand questions...well, I have
all your answers," said Sherlock Holmes.
"What is the average airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?"
"European or African?"
"Damn, he's good. Sorry...who are you?" Zoner asked.
"I think I know," ReRob told him.
"I am Sherlock Holmes, consulting detective," said Holmes,
"although you remember me better as Mr. Edison Bell, Esquire."
"Ding!" Gryphon said, slapping five with ReRob.
"Edison!" said q. "But like how'd you survive? We all
thought you were dead for sure."
"And indeed I was," Holmes replied.
"And?"
"I effected an escape," Holmes replied, as though he was
talking about an ordinary jailbreak. "Death is a harsh mistress, but
she's not as clever as Edison Bell." He smiled a sly grin. "Reality
here knows that, as does Zoner."
"Ah, sorry, not me... Wait a minute..." Zoner said, turning to
Reality as a memory block from long ago melted away. "Reality? You
know Death?!"
"Well, not personally...I mean, we've never met," Reality
replied.
"But I saw--oh, bother. Another one. I should have figured.
In any event, I escaped, but to the wrong dimension, and without my
travel equipment...I was stranded on Earth, in the late 19th century,
and had to wait until this Vaughn came along...I was able to harness
his latent power to bring us here."
"But--"
"There's precious little time, my friends, so you must listen
closely to what I have to say to you. I am about to explain to you
what and why your universe is, and how it came to be. Reality was
close, but erred in several particulars. This universe arose in the
usual manner, just like all the others, and progressed quite
normally--until the spring of 1989. Then, a young member of the Q
Continuum, the omnipotent beings who strive to keep balance in the
universe, when they're not toying with it, made human and cast out
onto Earth with no memory of his previous existence, committed an
error.
"His name was John Todd."
All eyes in the room turned to q, who drew back. "Like me?
Like no way. Coolness."
Ignoring his protests, Holmes continued, "Todd displayed no
inklings of his previous power, expect perhaps for picking up the
nickname `q' apparently quite by accident. Until one night in 1989
when, intoxicated and attempting to program something, q tapped his
repressed Q powers and created the HoloDECstation. He promptly forgot
all about it, and it sat dormant, waiting for the right mind to come
along and free it.
"That mind would not come until October 2nd, 1991. It was
then that--"
"--that I found the HoloDECstation in the Fuller basement,"
Gryphon finished, haltingly. "But...what about Lord F? He said he
created the HoloDECstation."
"He did. After it created him, in the past, before it had
been created. Oh, never mind, I'm getting to that. Haven't you
noticed that this universe seems a bit warped? A bit odd? Did you
think the existence of all these races and technologies that exactly
mirror fiction was coincidence? Didn't you ever notice that the
universe was exactly the way it would be if it were the universe you
were writing?"
"What are you saying?" Zoner demanded.
"I'm saying that, when Gryphon here discovered the
HoloDECstation and took those first few faltering steps with CLULESS,
he did far more than create two women out of thin air. His
subconscious mind, attuned to the station's subspace energy patterns,
reshaped the entire cosmos, right down to the ether-concept level,
into the image of his ideal. Into what he would have the universe be
like if he were writing it as a story."
"But the universe is also off kilter in favor of the rest of
the Rats. Actually it seems to favor me almost as much as Ben."
"That is simply explained. He was calling up a gif from your
site and his mind connected that action to you. It also helped that
you had organized the site to your tastes as it supplied the raw data.
So when his thoughts reformed the universe they were taken into
account. Same for the rest of the Rats, they're never far from his
thoughts."
"That's ridiculous!" ReRob protested. "You're saying we're
all nothing more than characters in his story?"
"No!" Holmes barked. "Hear me out! You existed before all
that, Robert. And you too, MegaZone. Your destinies were rewritten,
perhaps; your selves remained the same, and admirably `up' to their
tasks, might I add. No, you're not characters in his story." He
turned and indicated the three men behind him. "You're characters in
theirs!"
"What?!" exclaimed MegaZone, Gryphon, ReRob, Kei, Yuri,
Zoner2, Gryphon2, and ReRob2.
"Oh, by the way, Rob...yeah. Yeah, this is better than sex,"
Gryphon2 said. "Look! This is our universe. Our characters. Look,
Rob--there's you, with your cyberarm. And me..."
Before they could go on, a bright flash of light illuminated
the middle of the room, and when it faded, a sneering presence in a
WDF Admiral's uniform was standing there.
"So, you've figured it out, eh?" said Q. "I'll give you
credit. You're pretty good, for a dumb monkey." He walked over to q.
"Your cover's blown, pal; come on. Back to the Continuum."
"Like no way," q replied.
"What do you mean, `no way'?"
"Like I'm human now eh? I'm not going back."
"That's ridiculous, of course you're going back--"
Holmes strode over, caught the omnipotent being's arm in his
hand and, with remarkable strength, whirled him around.
"He doesn't want to go," Holmes said in a low, threatening
voice. "He isn't going."
"The hell you say, monkey...boy..." Q trailed off as he
looked into Holmes' eyes, piercing, slate grey eyes that bored to the
bottom of his omnipotent soul. The face was different, but he would
know those eyes anywhere.
"You..." he whispered. "Bell..."
"I'm glad you recognize me, Q. Now get out of here. This is
no affair of yours."
"I don't have to--" Q began, weak and defensive-sounding.
"Go!" Holmes roared, releasing and shoving Q in the same
motion. "Go now, before I alert the Time Lords to your presence
here!"
Q paled. "All right, fine!" he shouted back, petulant. "One
of these days, Bell," he promised, and with another flash, he was
gone.
"How did you do that?" Zoner asked.
"My people and the Q have been enemies for millennia," Holmes
replied. "We and the Time Lords are the only races they have ever
been defeated by."
"Defeated...?"
"That's not important right now! What's important is that
this universe is on the verge of collapse--"
Gryphon2 interrupted him. "Incredible. It actually is our
universe. If I had a mind, I think I'd be losing it." He walked over
to his counterpart, noting his rank bar. "A captain, eh? You've done
well by yourself."
"You ought to know," Gryphon replied.
"No, actually, I didn't."
"Huh?"
"Which brings us to my point," Holmes cut in. "Somewhere
along the line, your universe diverged from their creative patterns.
You've outdistanced their creation. When I brought them here they
were hashing through the ending to the third part of their fictional
saga; just at the point where the Wedge Defense Force was shattered,
the original SDF-17 destroyed. You've passed that, hurdled the
challenge and gone right on toward your destinies without them.
"And that is a big problem."
Before anyone could ask why, the deck of the SDF-23 shook
violently, throwing almost everyone to the floor. They looked outside
and gasped; everything was gone. All the ships, the Dyson Sphere, the
AT&T, everything. Even space was gone; in place of that was
whiteness.
"Eve!" Zoner shouted. "What the hell's going on?"
"Shift to bridge life support subsystems. There was a slight
gravitational aberration during changeover," Eve reported.
"Cause of changeover?"
"Design flaw in the vessel," she replied. "No ship's
structures except the bridge currently exist."
"What?!"
"It's already happened. Damn, damn, I was hoping it wouldn't
start for another couple of hours at least, give me time to fully
explain," Holmes was saying, pacing the deck.
"What happened?" ReRob demanded.
"Eve, what is the nature of the universe?" Holmes asked in
reply.
"The universe is a spherical region forty meters in radius,"
Eve replied. "Correction; thirty-nine."
"What?!" Zoner asked. Then he, and the rest, saw it; the
blank whiteness outside was growing closer. It had eaten through the
transparent duranium bridge window and the tritanium shields, and was
closing in on the viewer's projection pit. This close they could see
it wasn't white, really, but black and white. In fact, it looked
exactly like television snow.
"Hey, ant wars," Zoner2 commented.
"The black ones seem to be winning. What is that?" asked
Gryphon2.
"That," Holmes replied, "is the end of this universe."
"What? Why?" Gryphon asked, slightly upset.
"You know, some things just will not do," q contributed.
"I wonder if she'll be there?" Zoner mused.
"Now this, this is a bit of a surprise," Zoner2 commented,
drawing an odd look from Zoner.
"I told you. This universe has slipped off your creative
tracks. You are no longer sustaining it. That is why you could get
no work done, earlier tonight; your creative energies, rather than
sustaining a universe, were just siphoning off into nothingness. When
it had drifted far enough from you, it ceased existing. The only
reason this room still exists is because of your presence, and even
that is not enough. Even Moxie couldn't help now."
"What can we do to stop it?" Zoner2 asked.
Holmes looked at them gravely. "The only way I know of to
stop this kind of dimensional accretion is to seal the ravenous void
closed, satiate it with all the existing energies of the type it
requires."
"In this case," ReRob2 said, beginning to comprehend, "our
creative energies."
"Quite."
"So...how do we feed that...that void our energies?" Gryphon2
asked.
"By feeding it yourselves," Holmes replied.
"What happens if we don't?"
"Then within minutes, the void will claim all. This room, and
all these people, will cease to have ever existed."
"Are you certain?"
"I have been a dimensional engineer for over 413 million
years," Holmes replied. "I have never been more certain."
"What about all that's already gone?"
"It will be restored if the void is closed. No one but the
people currently in this room will know that anything happened."
"What's waiting for us on the other side?" ReRob2 inquired.
"I honestly do not know," Holmes replied.
"But probably death," Zoner2 said, getting right to the point.
"It comes down to them, or us. Well, I really have no pressing
concerns back home. How long do we have?"
Holmes gauged the approach of the wall of nothingness and
said, "Not long at all. A few minutes, perhaps."
"Okay...staff meeting, gentlemen." Gryphon2, Zoner2, and
ReRob2 gathered in the corner of the room and talked for a minute or
two, each of them pausing to look around the room. ReRob, with his
cyberarm and his puzzled expression...Gryphon, standing very close to
Kei, his hand in hers and looking worried...Zoner, in his conn, the
fates of everyone around him running through his mind...Yuri, looking
at Zoner and wondering what was going through his mind...q, looking
confused. Then, they separated, walking forward.
"We're gonna do it," Zoner2 said without preamble.
"Are you sure?" Holmes replied. "It will very probably mean
the end of your existence..."
"We know," ReRob2 replied. "But let's face it; we're just
three guys, with short little lives ahead of us, and nothing
remarkable in our futures that we can see."
"When it comes down to our three little lives, or an entire
universe," Gryphon2 continued, "well...it really isn't any choice."
"We'd just like a minute..." Zoner2 added.
"By all means."
Zoner2 walked over to Zoner, leaning close to him so that no
one else could hear. "Listen close, my friend," he said, "I don't
have a lot of time. You are being a dick. You're walling. Don't say
a word, you know exactly what I mean. Here's my advice to me; don't.
You've got a wonderful woman there, just waiting for you to open up
and let her love you again. Don't throw that away. You can be happy.
All you have to do is trust in people. Them...you...yourself." He
smiled. "Lighten up, chummer. Life's too short. Besides, if I kill
myself for nothing and you muck it all up I will be very pissed.
How'd you like to be haunted by yourself? So, once I'm gone you kick
Largo's ass, destroy the great evil, and live happily ever after... Or
else. Write poetry or something, get a life." Zoner2 grinned
broadly, "Hail Eris!"
"Thanks," Zoner replied softly, his throat gone suddenly dry.
"Thanks...a lot. All hail Discordia."
"Don't let me down," Zoner2 replied with a grin. He went over
to Yuri. "Give me a chance, I'm not really all that bad of a guy.
Actually I guess it's my fault for writing me as such a dark dickweed.
I do have to say that I like how you turned out too.
"Hey Vaughn."
"Yeah?"
"Do me a favor. When you get home make a post for me. Let
rec.arts.anime and alt.suicide.holiday know what happened. Few will
probably believe it, but at least they were told. Of course let
everyone at WPI know what went down... Oh, and make sure that all my
stuff gets distributed amongst the Rats, SFS, library, whatever... And
let my parents know... Ah hell, just figure it out ok, I knew I should
have made a will. Goodbye. Oh, and hey, Reality: treat her right,"
he added cryptically, drawing a confused expression from both Vaughns.
Gryphon2 shook Gryphon's hand. "It's good to see I finally
became something worthwhile," he told his counterpart. "My name is in
good hands." He saluted. "Carry on, Captain."
"Aye aye...sir," Gryphon replied, a tear rolling down his
cheek. Here in front of him was his creator. He hadn't thought it
possible, and now here he was, and he was going away, going off to
die, to save his life and the lives of everyone he knew. He felt as
though there was more he should say, but nothing would come out.
"Kei," Gryphon2 said. "Take care of him, will you? He can
get a little fragile sometimes." Kei smiled weakly, but seemed unable
to speak; she shook her head and tried to make some words. "Shh, I
know, it's ok," Gryphon2 assured her, giving her a brief hug.
"Goodbye."
ReRob2 went over to ReRob and took out his wallet, removing
from that a business card. "Captain Mandeville," he said, "my card."
ReRob took the card and examined it; printed on it were the
words

Virtual Labs, Inc.
ReRob Mandeville
R&D Chief WAYWARD SON
"If it can be dreamed, it can be built."

"Little did I know how true those words would be," said ReRob2
with a smile. He turned to Vaughn. "Vaughn, when you get back home,
could you do something for me?"
"Sure, Rob," Vaughn replied. "What?"
"Tell Julia...tell her I'm sorry."
"Will do."
"Thanks."

<<< Peter Schilling: Major Tom (Coming Home) >>>

The three authors met in the front of the bridge, a bit behind
the slowly approaching wall of nothing. "Well," said Gryphon2, "I
guess this is it."
"Yep," Zoner2 replied. "Nice working with you, Dr. Venkman."
He turned and, humming "Suicide is Painless" to himself, stepped into
the void.
"we doctors know a hopeless case when - listen; there's a hell
of a good universe next door; let's go," Zoner mumbled as his
counterpart vanished.
"What was that?" Yuri quietly asked.
"An old e.e. cummings quote I read in the Schrodinger's Cat
Trilogy long, long ago."
"See you on the other side, Rob," Gryphon2 said to ReRob2. He
turned, squared his shoulders, whispered a farewell to someone--no one
caught the name--and dove headfirst.
ReRob2 turned and faced the bridge assemblage, gave them an
ornate hat salute, and silently walked into his destiny. A second
later, a gale-force wind blew out of the void as its "surface"
crackled with blue lightning; where all the lightning met, the void
spat out a single object, which bounced across the deck and then lay
still. ReRob's black fedora.
For a very long second, nothing happened.
There was a terrible ghastly silence.
There was a terrible ghastly noise.
There was a terrible ghastly silence.
(Sorry, Doug.)
The universe had returned, in exactly the state they had left
it, and time was running again. This left the stunned SDF-23 bridge
crew with a couple of pressing problems.
Like the AT&T main gun bolt that was heading right for the
windows.
By the time anyone noticed it, it was far too late to do
anything about it; it was coming in like a freight train, casting a
green glow over everything it was about to disintegrate. Zoner forced
his eyes to stay open, determined to meet his death head-on.
Until, just as it had centuries earlier, a bolt of orange
energy took the green bolt from the side, blasting it off-course and
splintering it into a thousand thousand tiny beams that the SDF-23's
shields soaked up easily.
"What was that?" Zoner demanded.
"It's her!" Reality shouted. "She's come back!" He turned
around and ran back into the turbolift.
"Who?" asked q.
"Who do you think, you dufus," Zoner replied with a wide grin.
"Her!" Outside, they could clearly see a woman, clad in pink and
black battlearmor, her thick yellow hair flying in space. Iczer-1.

Having reappeared back on the bridge of the Concordia, Gryphon
shook off his momentary disorientation just in time to see Iczer-1's
arrival. Grinning, he opened a channel to the SDF-23. "Hey,
Zoner--looks like the gang's all here, eh?"
"Looks like it," Zoner replied. "Maybe now we'll get
somewhere."