Dear Human; Peace Please, Join your Light!
Stephen Will Tanner
Jan Hansen (jan...@cbs.dtu.dk) wrote:
: THE 1000 LAMP MANDALA CEREMONY FOR PEACE IN TIBET
: AND OUR PRECIOUS WORLD:
I am Tibetam. Help me.
: Is now performed at more than 109 places in more than
: 12 different countries worldwide.
OVER [50] MILLION MONKS IGNITED
: At least 42.000 lights will lit.
They don't have many, but they're DAMN PRECISE.
[ Note to self: Make the mandatory Douglas Adams joke ]
: Many sincere thanks to all supporters.
Especially to the Jolt(tm) Cola Supporters.
: You can also construct a free format mandala or other symbol
: with 1000 lights together
Lite Brite, makin' mandalas with liiiiiiiight!
: For constructing a mandala see:
: http://www.tibet.dk/charity/mandala/draft.htm
If you play that webpage backwards you get a term paper for
your cross-listed Antrho/English class!
: Remember especially those who do not have the luxury of email.
For just pennies a day you can provide email to young people
like Paco. Hi, I'm Sally Struthers.
: The work has already begun in Aarhus and Copenhagen and other
^^^^^^
Aarhus!
In der miidl ov aar straBe!
Aarhus!
In der miidl ov aar straBe!
Somewhere out there is a postmodernist who grew up in the 70's and watches
late-night cable and listens to 80's music and reads every single message
on ark. He's laughing.
--
Stephen Tanner (tan...@math.wisc.edu)
Joseph Michael Bay
tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner) writes:
>Somewhere out there is a postmodernist who grew up in the 70's and watches
^
>late-night cable and listens to 80's music and reads every single message
>on ark. He's laughing.
YHGUTPOARK.
--
J. Michael Bay ( ) official business (x) bozo
Stanford University ( ) unofficial business (x) not a bozo
Medical School (x) other ( ) who, me?
Department of Science Stuff A mind is a terrible thing
Stephen Will Tanner
Joseph Michael Bay (jm...@leland.Stanford.EDU) wrote:
: tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner) writes:
:
: >Somewhere out there is a postmodernist who grew up in the 70's and watches
: ^
: >late-night cable and listens to 80's music and reads every single message
: >on ark. He's laughing.
:
: YHGUTPOARK.
I have given y'all the power of alt.religion.kibology!
I forgot, for a moment, that you people know all mass culture everywhere.
There's also the problem of the gender-specific pronoun. Although,
I'm not certain I should worry about that after some of my other posts...sort
of like closing the barn door after the bull has gotten out AND GORED
GLORIA STEINEM.
[ dissolve ]
Woman: Hey, there's that guy who's been objectifying women in his posts!
Me: I'm "objectifying women" RN, IYKWIM...
Woman: Hey, he's the one who posted about mail-order brides!
Me: And smut, don't forget the smut.
Woman: Hey, he failed to use a gender-neutral pronoun! LET'S GET 'IM!
[ Somewhere on a tropical isle, a volcano erupts, spewing forth all the
virgins that have been deposited in it over the years. Dressed as
Valkyries, they zoom in for a strafing run ]
Me: Aiiiiieee! Teutonic battle-bimbos assail me! Must...think up...
plot contrivance! POSTMODERN POWERS...ACTIVATE! FORM OF...
ANDY KAUFMANN!
[ A bolt of lightning shazams through me, turning me into a paragon
of nerdly might ]
Me: I'll respect women when one of them COMES UP HERE and WRESTLES ME
TO THE GROUND!
[ Violence ensues. Lisa Rea films it. ]
Me: Hahaha! I am MIGHTY! I am invincibubble!
[ Jerry Lawler appears and piledrivers the living hell out of me ]
--
Stephen Tanner (tan...@math.wisc.edu)
Karlo Takki
In article <6544ik$1466$1...@news.doit.wisc.edu>
tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner) writes:
> I forgot, for a moment, that you people know all mass culture everywhere.
ALBERT EINSTEIN - EQUIVALENCE OF MASS AND ENERGY
ALEXANDER ABIAN - EQUIVALENCE OF MASS AND TIME
STEPHEN TANNER - EQUIVALENCE OF MASS AND CULTURE
WE MUST MEASURE TIME WITH A MEAT THERMOMETER
AND BEAUTY WITH A TURKEY BASTER. I WILL STOP
SHOUTING NOW. THAT IS ALL.
--k.
E Teflon Piano
In article <6547q0$c01$1...@usenet89.supernews.com>, kta...@artcrime.com
(Karlo Takki) wrote:
}In article <6544ik$1466$1...@news.doit.wisc.edu>
}tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner) writes:
}
}> I forgot, for a moment, that you people know all mass culture everywhere.
}
}ALBERT EINSTEIN - EQUIVALENCE OF MASS AND ENERGY
}ALEXANDER ABIAN - EQUIVALENCE OF MASS AND TIME
}STEPHEN TANNER - EQUIVALENCE OF MASS AND CULTURE
Alt.religion.kibology is the naked point-singularity of culture. REORBIT
THE ARK TO BECOME A BORN-AGAIN FOX NETWORK. End Disney, tractor pulls,
trailer-trash
TV talk-abouts etx.
--
E Teflon Piano is now AppleEvent aware, and is running under Mac OS 8. Now previewing MiniWin.
ŠE[dibs] 1994-1997
Ben Weiner
I spent hours writing this and it doesn't appear to have
ever propogated. Probably Janet Reno suppressed it. Or
Roy Scheider's agent. Here goes:
tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner) writes:
>Jan Hansen (jan...@cbs.dtu.dk) wrote:
>: THE 1000 LAMP MANDALA CEREMONY FOR PEACE IN TIBET
>: AND OUR PRECIOUS WORLD:
>I am Tibetam. Help me.
>: Is now performed at more than 109 places in more than
>: 12 different countries worldwide.
>OVER [50] MILLION MONKS IGNITED
OVER [NINE] BILLION NAMES PRINTED
>: At least 42.000 lights will lit.
>They don't have many, but they're DAMN PRECISE.
>[ Note to self: Make the mandatory Douglas Adams joke ]
ONE BY ONE THE LIGHTS^H^H^H^H^H^H STARS WILL GO OUT [1]
>: Many sincere thanks to all supporters.
>Especially to the Jolt(tm) Cola Supporters.
The END OF THE WORLD [tm] is computed by DEC Alpha Stations.
We thank DIGITAL EQUIPMENT CORPORATION for their sponsorship. [2]
>: You can also construct a free format mandala or other symbol
>: with 1000 lights together
>Lite Brite, makin' mandalas with liiiiiiiight!
I am sitting in a room in a basement under 125th Street
with my Alphastations, and the walls of the room are covered
with Lite Brites. A thousand Lite Brites, all glowing,
filling the room with a merciless color. Con Ed knows hundreds
of thousands of watts of power are disappearing somewhere
uptown, but they can't figure out where ... [3]
>: For constructing a mandala see:
>: http://www.tibet.dk/charity/mandala/draft.htm
>If you play that webpage backwards you get a term paper for
>your cross-listed Antrho/English class!
>: Remember especially those who do not have the luxury of email.
>For just pennies a day you can provide email to young people
>like Paco. Hi, I'm Sally Struthers.
>: The work has already begun in Aarhus and Copenhagen and other
> ^^^^^^
The GREAT WORK is BEGUN!
>Aarhus!
>In der miidl ov aar straBe!
>Aarhus!
>In der miidl ov aar straBe!
Da da da daah.
Ich lieb dich nicht, du liebst mich nicht.
Da da da daah.
[Two slackers drive by, in a glistening ovoid
metal Volkswagen Vegan Space Fort.]
>Somewhere out there is a postmodernist who grew up in the 70's and watches
>late-night cable and listens to 80's music and reads every single message
>on ark. He's laughing.
Stephen Tanner, stop looking over my shoulder.
I AM LOGORRHEUS OF POPCULTURE. PREPARE TO BE ASSIMILATED !
ATTENTION PEOPLES OF EARTH, WE THE PEOPLES OF SPACE ADDRESS YOU [Blam!} [4]
-Ben
[1] "One by one, the lights are going out
Things are forgotten, as darkness mounts
So Laura came to the water
Without a word on her breath ..."
-- '80s theme song to "Twin Peaks,"
by Tom Verlaine <-- He's a poet, and you know it!
[2] And ADM, Price-fixing Supermarket to the World.
[3] From the unpublished "The Last Invisible Visions" by
the late Harlan "Ralph" Ellison - his unfinished
posthumous magnum opus.
[4] This is just to troll Matt McIrvin and Dave DeLaney,
but I only now realized the similarity ...
Francis X. MacHinery -> "Earthman Come Home" -> James Blish
James Blish -> hack "Star Trek" books -> fandom -> syndication profits
syndication profits -> bright idea -> Star Trek: The Net Generation
Star Trek: The Net Generation -> Patrick Stewart -> Patrick McGoohan
Patrick McGoohan -> Francis X. MacHinery -> Earthman Come Home
Patrick Stewart -> bald captains -> John Amalfi -> Earthman Come Home
Earthman Come Home -> James Blish -> Earthman Come Home -> Vegan Space Fort
Vegan Space Fort -> Vogon construction cruiser -> "Independence Day"
Vegan Space Fort -> Borg cuboid ship -> Borg -> robotic acting
robotic acting -> "Small Wonder" -> Roy Scheider -> Seaquest DSV
Matt McIrvin
Ben Weiner <bwe...@muon.rutgers.edu.remove.kremvax.su> wrote:
> Francis X. MacHinery -> "Earthman Come Home" -> James Blish
> James Blish -> hack "Star Trek" books -> fandom -> syndication profits
> syndication profits -> bright idea -> Star Trek: The Net Generation
> Star Trek: The Net Generation -> Patrick Stewart -> Patrick McGoohan
> Patrick McGoohan -> Francis X. MacHinery -> Earthman Come Home
> Patrick Stewart -> bald captains -> John Amalfi -> Earthman Come Home
> Earthman Come Home -> James Blish -> Earthman Come Home -> Vegan Space Fort
> Vegan Space Fort -> Vogon construction cruiser -> "Independence Day"
> Vegan Space Fort -> Borg cuboid ship -> Borg -> robotic acting
> robotic acting -> "Small Wonder" -> Roy Scheider -> Seaquest DSV
This explains the dream I just had which was an amalgamation in mutant
3D Bozorama of bits of "SeaQuest DSV" and "Star Wars" and "Babylon 5"
and the end of "Blade Runner" and maybe "Zippy the Pinhead."
Kent McCord had just come back from his flying-saucer trip and he had
all kinds of super alien technology. He had a gun that shot a ray that
made spaceships go real fast. Also he was immune to the laws of
perspective. We were looking at a space battle that was going on in the
distance, with little Starfuries shooting at TIE fighters or something,
and he reached out and plucked one of the Starfuries out of the sky and
handed it to me. It was about four inches across and made of origami.
I had other dreams earlier that night, but they were all about data
structures and pointer arithmetic.
I believe that I have passed through some kind of Ultimate Geek
Trans-Warp Threshold here, and soon I will turn into a newt or perhaps a
leopard gecko.
Ow, owwwwww, the Twenty-third Street spindizzy is screeching again.
--
Font-o-Meter! Proportional Monospaced
^
Physics, humor, Stanislaw Lem reviews: http://world.std.com/~mmcirvin/
James Kibo Parry
In alt.religion.kibology, Jan Hansen <jan...@cbs.dtu.dk> wrote:
>
> THE 1000 LAMP MANDALA CEREMONY FOR PEACE IN TIBET
> AND OUR PRECIOUS WORLD:
FOLLOWED BY THE 3 LAMP MODERATELY CROOKED LINE CEREMONY FOR
PEACE ON MY CRUMMY BLOCK.
THIS TEXT *IS* *TOO* CENTERED!
> Is now performed at more than 109 places in more than
> 12 different countries worldwide.
> At least 42.000 lights will lit. May they burn without
> difference. Many sincere thanks to all supporters.
Click whirrrrrr initiate BobHopeTronic-777 wacky response nine alpha BEEEEEP
> It is a great joy to announce that also:
> The Kashag representing the The Tibetan Government in Exile
> will light 1000 lamps for Tibet in HH Dalai Lama's personal
> Temple: Thekchen Choeling Tsuklakhang in Dharamsala on the
> 10th Dec. in order to celebrate: the 1000 Lamp Mandala Ceremony
> and the conferment of the Nobel Peace Prize to His Holiness the
> 14th Dalai Lama of Tibet.
If I were the Pope, I would change my title to "The Holier Than You Pope
Kibo The Only." And I'd secretly switch the Vatican with the Liberace Museum
and NOBODY WOULD NOTICE!!!
> Additionally, many Tibetan exile communities in India as well
> as Nepal, will also light many 1000 lamps on the same day and time.
>
> You can join this yearly ceremony by the very simple act of
> lighting a candle in your window at:
> 10th December 1997 at sunset, so the lights can be seen.
But what if it's too DARK then to see the lights?
> Independent of tradition, who you are, where you come from
> what you believe in, and what you like/dislike. Simple and easy.
> Although tiny, still quite significant...
>
> Please remember: Peace is the crucial base for all.
PLUG CAPTAIN BRIDGER INTO HIS BASE TO REENACT CLASSIC SEAQUEST EXCITEMENT!
> For further information: http://www.tibet.dk/charity/mandala/
>
> Please join your support by adding your coordinates at
> our server: http://www.tibet.dk/charity/mandala/world1.htm
> or by sending us a mail or fax.
>
> May we succeed joining!
>
> You can also construct a free format mandala or other symbol
> with 1000 lights together with some humans around you on a
> good place as eg. churches, temples, public squares etc.
> and light it at the 10th December 1997 at sunset so the lights
> can be seen.
WAAAAH!!!! MY GIANT FLAMING H CAUGHT FIRE!!!!
> For constructing a mandala see:
> http://www.tibet.dk/charity/mandala/draft.htm
For information on the HTTP protocol stare at this:
\\\\\\\\\\\\\||||||||||||/////////////
>>\\\\\\\\\\\\||||||||||////////////<<
>>>>\\\\\\\\\\\||||||||///////////<<<<
>>>>>>\\\\\\\\\\||||||//////////<<<<<<
>>>>>>>>\\\\\\\\\||||/////////<<<<<<<<
(insert eerie woo-woo-woo noise here.)
>>>>>>>>/////////||||\\\\\\\\\<<<<<<<<
>>>>>>//////////||||||\\\\\\\\\\<<<<<<
>>>>///////////||||||||\\\\\\\\\\\<<<<
>>////////////||||oh hell with it finish the ASCII graphic yourself.
> Please forward this message to any suitable parties either
> by personal contact, fax, email, phone or other means.
> Remember especially those who do not have the luxury of email.
It's not a luxury... it's an ILLNESS!!!
> [...]
> World Appeal from T.D. Lakha Lama
> [...]
>
> Yours truly T.D. Lakha, Denmark
>
> Tashi delek
> Namaste
> iiiihhh altsaa
In the future, all sentences will be alphabetized for maximum compressibility!
"Aaaaaaaaaaabcccdddddeeeeeeeeeefffggggghhhhiiiiilllllllllmmmnnnnnoooooooopp
rrrrrssssssstttttttttttttuuuvwwyyyy,,,.?" -- Susan Anton
-- K.
The first person to decompress
that sentence will WIN A TRIP
TO THE MOON ON A PUBLIC BUS!!!
Stephen Will Tanner
Ben Weiner (bwe...@muon.rutgers.edu.remove.kremvax.su) wrote:
:
: OVER [NINE] BILLION NAMES PRINTED
Christ. Is this the reference I think it is? Oh my God.
Allah. Jehovah. Jesus H.[1] Christ on a stick.
Speaking of metaphorical Christ figures, Aslan could kick Rayden's
butt any day of the week. New Mortal Kombat movie not good.
Except for the scene filmed in exploit-o-vision. (Two mud-slathered women
fight. Who wins? THE MALE VIEWER!)
: Da da da daah.
: Ich lieb dich nicht, du liebst mich nicht.
: Da da da daah.
With neunundneunzig Luftballonen rock me Amadeus!
[1] The H stands for Hallmark, because God cared enough to send the
very best. <-- Joke stolen from John Cage
--
Stephen Tanner (tan...@math.wisc.edu)
Lupus Yonderboy
Thus spake tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner):
>Ben Weiner (bwe...@muon.rutgers.edu.remove.kremvax.su) wrote:
>: OVER [NINE] BILLION NAMES PRINTED
>
>Christ. Is this the reference I think it is? Oh my God.
>Allah. Jehovah. Jesus H.[1] Christ on a stick.
That's right. It's a reference to The Nine Billion Names
of Dan Sale!
REPOST ALERT!
Subject: Re: He's Back - R we $1K richer?
From: ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry)
Newsgroups: alt.freemasonry, alt.religion.kibology
In alt.freemasonry, "Dan Sale" <ds...@users.southeast.net> wrote:
> [quoting Diane Wilson commenting on the esteemed Mr. Sale's promise to
> leave the newsgroup and pay everyone in the world $1000 if he ever
> posted to alt.freemasonry again:]
>
>> I guess we will have to have patience and tolerance until he decides
>> to unsubscribe from this thread.
>
>> You will have to have patience and tolerance until I decide to
>> unsubscribe from the INTERNET, Mrs. Wilson. I don't know who you think
>> you are, but you do NOT own the internet, you do NOT act as some kind
>> of center for it, and you do NOT lay down its laws. 3 different people
>> fowarded me your message, as you are obviously going out of your way
>> to pinpoint and attack me once again.
> The message I responded to was crossposted to alt.conspiracy. In fact,
> it was crossposted to many groups, and I didn't bother to even view the
> headers. alt.freemasonry I am NOT subscribed to, but I do have it qued
> now due to your obvious agenda to wreak havok upon me. I am adding the
> conditions of my withdrawal from this group as long as MY NAME IS
> HEREAFTER NEVER MENTIONED. My name is now COPYRIGHTED and CAN NOT be
> published ANYWHERE without my WRITTEN CONSENT. Upon the mentioning of
> my name, I will be forced to turn all current users posting to this
> group over to my legal representatives for possible legal action
> AGAINST THE ENTIRE NEWSGROUP.
La la la la la la Dan Sale has fleas la la la la la la la la la la la la
la!
Everyone, please pay close attention. The following variants of Mr. Sale's
name are also copyrighted, and to use them you will have to pay him A
BILLION MILLION TRILLION ZILLION DOLLARS WORTH OF CANDY:
Dan "Cooties" Sale
Dan "Mr. Clown Pants" Sale
Dan "Nose Honker" Sale
Dan "Michael Jackson Grandjunior" Sale
Dan "Pippi Longstocking" Sale
Dan "Shatneriffic" Sale
Dan "Less Swift Than The Entire 'E!' Channel" Sale
Dan "I wish I had some ice cubes but I forgot the recipe" Sale
Dan "Tiddlywinks On A Pocket Pool Table" Sale
Dan "Not Allowed To Have Anything Sharper Than A Rubber Ball" Sale
Dan "I Thought Freemasonry Meant There Was No Initiation Fee" Sale
Dan "I'm A Marsha Mason" Sale
Dan "Burgerbrain" Sale
Dan "Human Pez Dispenser" Sale
Dan "Is Beavis A Cartoon TOO?" Sale
Dan "I copyrighted my name but spelled it wrong on the application so the
Government travelled back in time to change my birth certificate and I
ceased to exist and was replaced by Crispin Glover" Sale
Dan "Nougat" Sale
Dan "I'm The Reason The Commercial Says 'Game Pieces Do Not Actually
Talk'" Sale
Dan "Waaaah! My ice cream cone fell in the toilet!" Sale
Dan "Wonder Woman" Sale
Dan "Fire" Sale
Dan "I shouted 'Theater!' in a crowded fire" Sale
Dan "DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY! DOIDY!" Sale
Dan "I Wuv Kibo" Sale
-- K.
P.S. I'm 100% lawsuit-proof because my lawyer,
Hillary Clinton, just passed a law that if you
sue me you have to spend a week in a HAUNTED HOUSE!!!!
--
Alex Suter
"Do you want to know more?"
http://www-cs-students.stanford.edu/~asuter/
T.L. Kelly
one has to ask oneself: why do boys spend more time on ASCII drawings of
naked women than they do on learning the basic facts of anatomy?
wenchpoet
*********************************************************
I hate it when my leather bustier gets all twisted around
and it shows through my nursing uniform. -- julnar
Maelstrom
ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry) wrote thus:
>For information on the HTTP protocol stare at this:
>
> \\\\\\\\\\\\\||||||||||||/////////////
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> >>>>\\\\\\\\\\\||||||||///////////<<<<
> >>>>>>\\\\\\\\\\||||||//////////<<<<<<
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> (insert eerie woo-woo-woo noise here.)
> >>>>>>>>/////////||||\\\\\\\\\<<<<<<<<
> >>>>>>//////////||||||\\\\\\\\\\<<<<<<
> >>>>///////////||||||||\\\\\\\\\\\<<<<
> >>////////////||||oh hell with it finish the ASCII graphic yourself.
____________ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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"bdI"8, \-\I8 a l
`8, \-\I8' n e
`8,,--\I8' d u
`Ib,,I8' x
`I8I'
It's filth like this that is ruinng the internet for everyone. Hang your
head in shame Mr. Parry!
--Maelstrom
"Piglet, who said, "Well, it isn't a sponge and it isn't quite poo,
so it must be spooge, which is both and neither." This made Eeyore cry
so Tigger jumped up and down on him to cheer him up but that just killed him."
Kibo
Roger Douglas
So tan...@math.wisc.edu (Stephen Will Tanner) turns round and goes:
>Ben Weiner (bwe...@muon.rutgers.edu.remove.kremvax.su) wrote:
>:
>: OVER [NINE] BILLION NAMES PRINTED
>
>Christ. Is this the reference I think it is? Oh my God.
>Allah. Jehovah. Jesus H.[1] Christ on a stick.
>
#899999986 "Almighty Lord Vastron the Immense"
#899999987 "Plxostryzwzl"
#899999988 "His Sublime Majesty Pibb, Lord of the Pibbles""
#899999989 "Darren"
#899999990 "He whose Name the Pergolasters of Helebos Dare Nor Say"
#899999991 "Ralph42"
>: Da da da daah.
>: Ich lieb dich nicht, du liebst mich nicht.
>: Da da da daah.
>
Bei mir bist du schon.
--R.
Joseph Michael Bay
rdou...@magna.com.au (Roger Douglas) writes:
>Bei mir bist du schoen.
I could say "Bella, bella", could say "Wunderbar"
Each language only goes to show how wonderful you are!
Bei mir bist du shayn,
I'll say it agayn,
Then darling kiss me, and say you understand.
I didn't know Yiddish theater was still around in Austria.
--
J. Michael Bay ( ) official business (x) bozo
Stanford University ( ) unofficial business (x) not a bozo
Medical School (x) other ( ) who, me?
"Urine is wonderful . . . I'm high on urine." -- Bruce Ames