I had a dumb dream and therefore everyone needs to know about it.
Michael J. Sacks
> What does this mean, and do I need a root canal?
"Anatomy is destiny." --Sigmund Freud
"All this fuss about sleeping together. For physical pleasure, I'd sooner
go to the dentist any day." --Evelyn Waugh
Mike Sacks
James Kibo Parry
asked me to take off all my clothes, and while I was in the waiting room (nude)
she started trying to sell me Internet services. I recall she handed
me a laminated card which said in big Arial Bold letters that they ran Linux.
(It said that they had three levels of service, some of which carried the
pathetically unattractive offer of some FREE chocolate-covered cherries.)
It didn't say anything about Web hosting, nor did it give any indication
that they knew what they were doing, so I thought I'd string them along
a little to see just how incompetent they were: I asked the woman if
they supported SSL, and which UNIX shells were available. She said
"I don't know, but I can find out." and "All of them, I guess."
Just as I was about to ask her additional easy questions to detect whether
this dentist's office showed any signs of being a competent Internet
service provider (which I'm sure it wouldn't, as it was a DENTIST'S OFFICE)
another woman, with glasses and a clipboard, came up and informed me that
they were just testing me to see if I would notice anything abnormal,
and did I notice anything was wrong? I said, yeah,
1.) Dentists don't need people to be naked,
2.) Dentists make lousy Internet service providers,
3.) Chocolate-covered cherries were included with the lowest and highest
of the three service levels but not the regular one,
4.) Dentists don't give out candy, especially gross sticky sugar-slime
filled chocolate-covered cherries,
5.) They obviously didn't know what they were doing computer-wise,
6.) I liked the way they laminated their crappy badly-inkjetted Arial
leaflet so that they'd never have to bother printing out another copy,
...and I was debating whether to immediately put on my clothes and leave,
or to give them a rant about why using Linux rather than something supported
by a service contract would be a bad idea for a commercial Internet service
would be a very bad idea when I abruptly woke up.
Oh, yeah, and I was about ten. I mean in the dream, not last night.
Anyway, I'm familiar with the archetypal "teeth falling out" dream,
but this wasn't quite that*, and the "going to school naked" dream,
which this one superficially resembled, and the "falling" dream, which
I never have because usually I can fly in my dreams. Except in this one,
which was about to devolve into a comp.os.linux.advocacy flamewar.
I will wager that it is an unusual event to have a dream that is nerdier
than you are. Especially when _I_ have one which is nerdier than you are.
What does this mean, and do I need a root canal?
-- K.
Please say "no" so I
won't have to go back
to those stupid people.
* Claudia Christian has that one a lot, at least on TV. And the nude one.
Captain Infinity
James "Kibo" Parry wrote:
>Last night I dreamed
<snip>
>What does this mean, and do I need a root canal?
Please stop search-engine dream-bombing my toothache.
**
Captain Infinity
Lisa Pea
><I had a dumb boring dream, also I am afraid of girls and I wet my pants a lot.>
So, last night, I had this dream that I'd moved to LA, but I didn't
know anyone there. I was at a convention or something like that, and
when it got out, these big weird doors opened onto the city, and it
was dark outside. Not dark like "it is nighttime" dark, but DARK.
Black. I couldn't see anything, really, but I could sense someone in
front of me, some guy I'd talked to casually before, so I followed
him. I started thinking that this guy was some weird yuppie and I
hated him, but still, I was going to follow him anyway. So, I follow
this guy (and some other people who were with him) until we got to
this city park that was all lit up with floodlights. And all over this
place there were tomatoes growing. Like, little cherry tomatoes were
growing all over as groundcover, and there were trellises or
something, so that all around were tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes. Best
of all, there were these GIANT Roma tomatoes the size of WATERMELONS.
I was looking at one, and sort of wanted to say something like, "Wow.
That is one gigantic Roma tomato!" but I decided not to because it
might make me look stupid, because firstly, I didn't know these people
and was trying to make it look like it was only a coincidence that I
was following them, and if I acted all surprised, it would catch them
onto the fact that I was all lost and didn't know where I was going.
This dream made me think about the book American Psycho, but I'm not
sure why, except for the whole yuppie asshole thing.
Anyway, I was awakened while I was looking at that tomato and couldn't
get back to sleep, so I'm not sure how this dream ended.
Nick S Bensema
James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>...and I was debating whether to immediately put on my clothes and leave,
>or to give them a rant about why using Linux rather than something supported
>by a service contract would be a bad idea for a commercial Internet service
>would be a very bad idea when I abruptly woke up.
Indeed, but you did let slip your opinion of Linux for, like, the first
time in a while.
I'd like to point out that our school's contract-supported SCO box
was perpetually in some state of brokitude. No amount of paper will
stop a computer, or a school administration, from being stupid.
>Anyway, I'm familiar with the archetypal "teeth falling out" dream,
Never had the teeth falling out dream, though I remember misplacing
my penis once or twice, wondering what it was doing in my backpack.
>but this wasn't quite that*, and the "going to school naked" dream,
>which this one superficially resembled, and the "falling" dream, which
I've been lots of places naked in my dreams, or at least with no
pants, but nobody ever notices. I bet it's less a function of my
psyche and more a function of not having enough blankets.
>I never have because usually I can fly in my dreams. Except in this one,
>which was about to devolve into a comp.os.linux.advocacy flamewar.
I haven't fallen since I was seven, because I just can't top that
last falling dream. It was so perfectly executed; I was sleeping on
the floor that night. I had fallen out of the treehouse for some
reason, and I was really scared, then all of a sudden it was real
quiet, I slowed to falling about a few inches per second, then when
I was about a foot off the ground, slow dissolve to the inside of my
bedroom, where I gently float down the remaining few inches, into the
place on the floor where I fell asleep the night before. Brilliant.
>I will wager that it is an unusual event to have a dream that is nerdier
>than you are. Especially when _I_ have one which is nerdier than you are.
You know how some programmers claim to dream in their programming
language of choice? How come nobody who dreams in C++ or Perl ever
posts about those dreams? Are they afraid Larry Wall will psychoanalyze
their code and conclude that they want to make love to their
grandmother and her cats?
--
Nick Bensema <ni...@primenet.com> 98-KUPD Red Card #710563 UIN: 2135445
~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
duh
Clancy Dalebout
> ...and I was debating whether to immediately put on my clothes and leave,
> or to give them a rant about why using Linux rather than something supported
> by a service contract would be a bad idea for a commercial Internet service
> would be a very bad idea when I abruptly woke up.
> Oh, yeah, and I was about ten. I mean in the dream, not last night.
> Anyway, I'm familiar with the archetypal "teeth falling out" dream,
> but this wasn't quite that*, and the "going to school naked" dream,
> which this one superficially resembled, and the "falling" dream, which
> I never have because usually I can fly in my dreams. Except in this one,
> which was about to devolve into a comp.os.linux.advocacy flamewar.
Does that mean I can crosspost this to comp.os.linux.advocacy?
Mr. Bumgartner will be pleased, he misses you.
> * Claudia Christian has that one a lot, at least on TV. And the nude one.
--
Clancy Dalebout | xmsho@!spam!nein!yahoo.com
"Gravity is an invisible frog named Shwink-A-Jee that presses down on
the top of your head to keep you short." --Kibo
David DeLaney
> I recall she handed
> me a laminated card which said in big Arial Bold letters that they ran Linux.
Take lessons, kids. Kibo can distinguish fonts in his sleep. [Whenever +I+
try to read something in my sleep, it shifts around morphoresonatingly -
I can usually make out the sense of what it's saying, as if it were being
injected directly into my brain somehow ( ... somehow ...) but the actual
words look like, pardon the expression, a dream sequence. I'm glad to see
there's someone out there whose dreamwor(l)ds hold still long enough to
be sensible...]
Dave "mr sandmaaaan..." DeLaney
--
\/David DeLaney d...@panacea.phys.utk.edu "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://panacea.phys.utk.edu/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ/ I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
Theresa Willis
>In article <kibo-27109...@ppp0a022.std.com>,
>James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>>...and I was debating whether to immediately put on my clothes and leave,
>>or to give them a rant about why using Linux rather than something supported
>>by a service contract would be a bad idea for a commercial Internet service
>>would be a very bad idea when I abruptly woke up.
>
>Indeed, but you did let slip your opinion of Linux for, like, the first
>time in a while.
>
>I'd like to point out that our school's contract-supported SCO box
>was perpetually in some state of brokitude. No amount of paper will
>stop a computer, or a school administration, from being stupid.
>
>>Anyway, I'm familiar with the archetypal "teeth falling out" dream,
>
I don't think _my_ "teeth falling out" dream is archetypal, so
there.
I didn't have 'em until AFTER I had three of my teeth capped (to
correct their Ozarkian leanings). When the temporary glue wears
off, they get all loose and wiggly, which is the signal for going
back to the dentist to get the permanent glue.
>>I will wager that it is an unusual event to have a dream that is nerdier
>>than you are. Especially when _I_ have one which is nerdier than you are.
>
>You know how some programmers claim to dream in their programming
>language of choice? How come nobody who dreams in C++ or Perl ever
>posts about those dreams? Are they afraid Larry Wall will psychoanalyze
>their code and conclude that they want to make love to their
>grandmother and her cats?
Here is my nerdiest dream (aside from the one about you guys
picking your WWF personas):
I'm holding a hard drive, explaining to my boss that it is
broken. The hard drive is warm, smells like burnt resistors,
smoke is coming out of it and it's making a sound like frying
bacon.
I am not making up the part about smoke coming out and frying
bacon. I feel I should point out that I had this dream way before
I started annoying people on Usenet, and even before people on
Usenet started annoying me. I guess the Hivemind's siren song was
calling me even then.
--Terri
Nick S Bensema
David DeLaney <d...@panacea.phys.utk.edu> wrote:
>In alt.religion.kibology James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
>> I recall she handed
>> me a laminated card which said in big Arial Bold letters that they ran Linux.
>
>Take lessons, kids. Kibo can distinguish fonts in his sleep. [Whenever +I+
>try to read something in my sleep, it shifts around morphoresonatingly -
>I can usually make out the sense of what it's saying, as if it were being
>injected directly into my brain somehow ( ... somehow ...) but the actual
>words look like, pardon the expression, a dream sequence. I'm glad to see
>there's someone out there whose dreamwor(l)ds hold still long enough to
>be sensible...]
I can read in my dreams. I've never noticed the effect you describe.
And I'm also pretty sure I dream in color. But I haven't paid much
attention lately. I just remember knowing that this was unusual
when I was young.
I wonder what other dream abilities I have that most other people don't?
Could they be considered dream superpowers?
If it's any consolation to the rest of you, I don't remember ever being
able to fly in my dreams. Well, maybe once but that was probably just
a dream about a video game.
The Avocado Avenger
>I didn't have 'em until AFTER I had three of my teeth capped (to
>correct their Ozarkian leanings).
You know, I am so sick and tired of you northern Missourians going
around pretending to be like us cool southern Missourians, or Ozarkians.
Just because you've never run from the revenuers, or made potato
moonshine, and have all your teeth doesn't mean you need to get all nasty.
Lovely Missouri fact: there is a town called Ozark. Really.
Springfield is just about to eat it alive, as though Ozark were merely a
insignificant speck of dust in the Springfield Godzilla's eye. Or
something.
Also, I'm drinking Ozarka water, and it's from TEXAS! HELLO?! WHO'S
THE IDJIT IN TEXAS THAT THINKS HE'S IN MISSOURI?!
Stacia * The Avocado Avenger * Life is a tale told by an idiot;
http://www.io.com/~stacia/ * Full of sound and fury,
Remove the guacamole to reply! * Signifying nothing.
Theresa Willis
>twi...@sound.net (Theresa Willis) writes:
>
>>I didn't have 'em until AFTER I had three of my teeth capped (to
>>correct their Ozarkian leanings).
>
> You know, I am so sick and tired of you northern Missourians going
>around pretending to be like us cool southern Missourians, or Ozarkians.
>Just because you've never run from the revenuers, or made potato
>moonshine, and have all your teeth doesn't mean you need to get all nasty.
Excuse, Ms. Smarty Avocado-Person, but I will have you know that
I spend my formative high-school years in a town a mere 45 mi
north of Springfield. So there.
> Lovely Missouri fact: there is a town called Ozark. Really.
Big freaking deal. The town I lived in was called Humansville.
HUMANSVILLE!!!! Takes a long time to get over that sort of thing.
>Springfield is just about to eat it alive, as though Ozark were merely a
>insignificant speck of dust in the Springfield Godzilla's eye. Or
>something.
Proof that I'm not lying:
I know that Springfield has a lot of Chinese restaurants.
I have shopped at the Battlefield Mall.
I have thrown paper airplanes at the Springfield Math Relays.
I've been to the Bolivar Drive-In.
I've swam in Stockton Lake and Pomme de Terre.
I know about Halfway and Peculiar.
I marched in the St. Patrick's Day parade at Rolla.
I've even been to the FREAKIN' LAKE OF THE OZARKS.
And Branson.
And Eureka Springs.
Hell, I've even skeined for freakin' crawdads, and hunted the
wiley water cress.
Happy? Happy now? You've opened a dark box from my past. You
should be really proud of yourself.
One thing I would like to make clear: ALTHOUGH I HAVE DONE TIME
IN THE OZARKS, I AM IN NO WAY AN OZARKIAN. IT WAS JUST THREE OF
MY TEETH THAT WERE SOMEWHAT OZARKIAN-LIKE, AND THAT HAS BEEN
RECTIFIED. THANK YOU.
> Also, I'm drinking Ozarka water, and it's from TEXAS! HELLO?! WHO'S
>THE IDJIT IN TEXAS THAT THINKS HE'S IN MISSOURI?!
>
Get the rope.
--Terri
Jennifer Spengler {wooble}
> > Also, I'm drinking Ozarka water, and it's from TEXAS! HELLO?! WHO'S
> >THE IDJIT IN TEXAS THAT THINKS HE'S IN MISSOURI?!
> >
>
> Get the rope.
Good one! *chuckle*
~Jen
--
* Knowledge may be power, but ignorance is bliss. *
* --Jennifer Spengler =P *
* http://www.i-america.net/homepages/hally2000/ *
* Both Sides Of the Mood** *
James Kibo Parry
>
> Here is my nerdiest dream (aside from the one about you guys
> picking your WWF personas):
If I were in the World Wildlife Federation I'd want to be the invisible
part of the disconnected panda in their logo. You know, the one that looks like
O O
=
/ \
...only the black bits are closer together.
> I'm holding a hard drive, explaining to my boss that it is
> broken. The hard drive is warm, smells like burnt resistors,
> smoke is coming out of it and it's making a sound like frying
> bacon.
I think your dream would be funnier if it made a smell like frying
bacon and a sound like "RESISTORS ARE USELESS!!!"
Now please say "But I can't change it, it was a REAL DREAM!" so we
can pretend we're in a college writing workshop.
> I am not making up the part about smoke coming out and frying
> bacon.
That's me. Sorry, folks. I'll stop materializing imaginary bacon in
your hard drives. You can all go back to sleep in your dreams now.
-- K.
"Match Game '74" is on right before
"The New Scooby-Doo Movies" here.
I am praying that some day the
same lame guest star will be on
both. "ZOINKS! THE GHOST OF
CHARLES NELSON REILLY!"
Today Scooby meets Sandy Duncan, zzz.
And Gene Rayburn just traded quips
with Greg Morris, and I spent half
an hour hoping Greg would blow him
up with his laser pen or something.
Or at least convince him that
Peter Graves's ghost was after him.
See, when "Mission: Impossible" did
fake ghosts, it was dumb, but when
"Scooby Doo" did it it was always a
spooky surprise. If "Match Game '74"
had a fake ghost, life would be perfect.
The Avocado Avenger
>sta...@io.guacamole.com (The Avocado Avenger) wrote:
>>twi...@sound.net (Theresa Willis) writes:
>>
>>>I didn't have 'em until AFTER I had three of my teeth capped (to
>>>correct their Ozarkian leanings).
>>
>> You know, I am so sick and tired of you northern Missourians going
>>around pretending to be like us cool southern Missourians, or Ozarkians.
>>Just because you've never run from the revenuers, or made potato
>>moonshine, and have all your teeth doesn't mean you need to get all nasty.
>Excuse, Ms. Smarty Avocado-Person, but I will have you know that
>I spend my formative high-school years in a town a mere 45 mi
>north of Springfield. So there.
I can't believe we lived so close together. I, my friend, spent from
1971-1981 in a town just 50 miles or so NE of Springfield, called Lebanon.
This was during the MidEast crisis and hostages and whatnot so when I
moved to Kansas and said I lived in Lebanon, everyone would say, "Lebanon!
Ha ha! Cooter!" and I'd have to explain the non-joke.
>> Lovely Missouri fact: there is a town called Ozark. Really.
>Big freaking deal. The town I lived in was called Humansville.
>HUMANSVILLE!!!! Takes a long time to get over that sort of thing.
At least it wasn't Decaturville. Population: cow.
>>Springfield is just about to eat it alive, as though Ozark were merely a
>>insignificant speck of dust in the Springfield Godzilla's eye. Or
>>something.
>Proof that I'm not lying:
>I know that Springfield has a lot of Chinese restaurants.
IWPTA "Cheese restaurants" and figured I should book the next flight out
to Springfield! Whoo hoo cheese!
>I have shopped at the Battlefield Mall.
When I once asked someone why it was called "Battlefield Mall", this
person, born and bred in the south of Missouri, replied, "I think there
was a battlefield around here or something. Maybe Civil War?"
>I have thrown paper airplanes at the Springfield Math Relays.
>I've been to the Bolivar Drive-In.
>I've swam in Stockton Lake and Pomme de Terre.
Bennet Springs. Ha Ha Tonka. Johnson Shut-Ins. Elephant Rock.
>I know about Halfway and Peculiar.
No one will get this joke except you and me.
>I marched in the St. Patrick's Day parade at Rolla.
I can beat this one. I've been BORN in Rolla!
>I've even been to the FREAKIN' LAKE OF THE OZARKS.
>And Branson.
God help you. Silver Dollar City is evil I tells ya, evil.
>And Eureka Springs.
>Hell, I've even skeined for freakin' crawdads, and hunted the
>wiley water cress.
>Happy? Happy now? You've opened a dark box from my past. You
>should be really proud of yourself.
Funny. I kinda miss Missouri.
Except for the mosquitoes. And that big billboard south of Springfield
that read "Welcome to Klan Kountry."
>> Also, I'm drinking Ozarka water, and it's from TEXAS! HELLO?! WHO'S
>>THE IDJIT IN TEXAS THAT THINKS HE'S IN MISSOURI?!
>Get the rope.
Nonono, the rope is for salsa, we go get Bobby Hodad for the drinking
water faux pas.
xepera
(moderated) recently-
>Dear Xepera,
>
>You are one of the lucky studiers of this form then some. I am from
>Columbia, Missouir and there is no place to be able to get peyote to go on
>a spirit journey. And with a considerable amount of regret I have not the
>money or the know how to go to Arizona or other such state to do so. I
>know the basics of a spirit journey, but would also like some more
>information from your point of view about it. I sincerely thank you for
>your time.
>Sincerely,
>Isaac Guest
> AKA
>Wondering Eagle
>
Carlos Froggy May
: Take lessons, kids. Kibo can distinguish fonts in his sleep. [Whenever +I+
: try to read something in my sleep, it shifts around morphoresonatingly -
: I can usually make out the sense of what it's saying, as if it were being
: injected directly into my brain somehow ( ... somehow ...) but the actual
: words look like, pardon the expression, a dream sequence. I'm glad to see
: there's someone out there whose dreamwor(l)ds hold still long enough to
: be sensible...]
Indeed. When I'm doing research, I sometimes dream I find a book or
folder that has the information I've been trying to find, and then
when I try to read it, the text disolves into nonsence after the first
few words, and I say "Whaa! I'm only DREAMING I found the information!".
It's very frustrating not to be able to read in my dreams.
So is my subconcious illiterate, or what?
wondering simply, --F.
* Fro...@neosoft.com ** "The Information Super-Frog" [dibs] *
http://www.angelfire.com/la/carlosmay/
Carlos Froggy May
: sta...@io.guacamole.com (The Avocado Avenger) wrote:
: > Lovely Missouri fact: there is a town called Ozark. Really.
: Big freaking deal. The town I lived in was called Humansville.
: HUMANSVILLE!!!! Takes a long time to get over that sort of thing.
AAAAHHHHHH!!
Theresa wins. Game over.
-- Frogsville
Clancy Dalebout
>>
>> Here is my nerdiest dream (aside from the one about you guys
>> picking your WWF personas):
> If I were in the World Wildlife Federation I'd want to be the invisible
> part of the disconnected panda in their logo.
What I want to know is why the World Wildlife Foundation and Panda Express
(The Taco Bell of Chinese food, for those not "in the know") have exactly
the same logo. Their PR mist be a bitch. I'll bet over half the people
that come to their membership drives are actually just looking for a $.59
egg roll signed by Roudy Roddy Piper.
--
Clancy Dalebout | xmsho@!spam!nein!yahoo.com
"With proper tactics, nuclear war need not be as destructive as it appears."
-- Henry Kissinger
"Tactical nukes? We don't need no stinkin' tactical nukes!" -- Larry Wall
twi...@sound.net
fro...@praline.no.neosoft.com (Carlos "Froggy" May) wrote:
> Theresa Willis (twi...@sound.net) wrote:
>
> : > Lovely Missouri fact: there is a town called Ozark. Really.
>
> : Big freaking deal. The town I lived in was called Humansville.
> : HUMANSVILLE!!!! Takes a long time to get over that sort of thing.
>
> AAAAHHHHHH!!
>
> Theresa wins. Game over.
>
I win again? Man, I'm on a roll this week. I haven't won this many times,
ever.
--Terri
-----------== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==----------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Discuss, or Start Your Own
James Kibo Parry
>
> James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote:
> >
> > Theresa Willis (twi...@sound.net) wrote:
> > >
> > > picking your WWF personas):
>
> > If I were in the World Wildlife Federation I'd want to be the invisible
> > part of the disconnected panda in their logo.
>
> What I want to know is why the World Wildlife Foundation and Panda Express
> (The Taco Bell of Chinese food, for those not "in the know")
Panda Express = Taco Bell Express
Panda = Taco Bell (I mean panda meat is Taco Bell.)
Sakkio Japan aka Sakura Japan aka Sarku Japan = Sambo's aka Denny's aka
Best Foods aka King Dons
Orientaste = nothing
Well, actually, it tastes worse than that. But it all adds up to nothing.
> have exactly the same logo. Their PR mist be a bitch.
NEW AEROSOL PUBLIC-RELATIONS BITCHES!
ALSO AVAILABLE IN THE PUMP!
(chanting) THE-PUMP-THE-PUMP-THE-PUMP!
> I'll bet over half the people that come to their membership drives are
> actually just looking for a $.59 egg roll signed by Roudy Roddy Piper.
"Rowdy" Roddy Piper isn't a wrestler, you big silly, he's an actor,
just like Tony Danza! If you want to pick on a wrestler, pick on
a real wrestler, like Lee Majors, The Million-Dollar Man!
-- K.
Also, never put coffee grounds,
potato skins, or Stretch Armstrong
into your garbage disposal.
Matt McIrvin
Bensema) wrote:
>You know how some programmers claim to dream in their programming
>language of choice? How come nobody who dreams in C++ or Perl ever
>posts about those dreams? Are they afraid Larry Wall will psychoanalyze
>their code and conclude that they want to make love to their
>grandmother and her cats?
I've had frequent dreams about fixing bugs in my own brain's software,
which seems to be written in C. Usually the C code in question is some
jumbled version of something I was just working on, only it somehow runs
on a biological system, and I have no idea how one gets the binary in
there (is there a flash ROM?)
Sometimes, I wake up from these dreams and it takes me several minutes to
convince myself that human brains do not run on C code.
--
Matt McIrvin http://world.std.com/~mmcirvin/
cuthulu
<snip>
How much do you resemble your x-face?
--
(o_ v1.2a s BO@ 0/0/ FD - 0 OBC 2 0 75.5% <16oct98> .---.
//\ Hey, I have an album, and you can listen to it at my URL _/__~0_\_
V_/_ cut...@prysm.net -- http://www.prysm.net/~cuthulu/ (_________)
.Nisaba Merrieweather
Matt McIrvin <mmci...@world.std.com> wrote in article
<mmcirvin-011...@ppp0a023.std.com>...
> > How come nobody who dreams in C++ or Perl ever
> >posts about those dreams?
> Sometimes, I wake up from these dreams and it takes me several minutes to
> convince myself that human brains do not run on C code.
<smile> What makes you think that they don't?
--
.Nisaba Merrieweather
nis...@tac.com.au
Nick S Bensema
Carlos "Froggy" May <fro...@praline.no.neosoft.com> wrote:
>
>Indeed. When I'm doing research, I sometimes dream I find a book or
>folder that has the information I've been trying to find, and then
>when I try to read it, the text disolves into nonsence after the first
>few words, and I say "Whaa! I'm only DREAMING I found the information!".
>It's very frustrating not to be able to read in my dreams.
I don't know if that's really a dream-reading function, or if it's the
same as my dream that I find something really really cool in my dreams
and am royally pissed when I wake up that it isn't there, like an
Atari 2600 Super Mario Bros cartridge or an invisibility kit, or a
time machine, or something useful like that.
>So is my subconcious illiterate, or what?
Rumor has it (and by rumor, I mean an animated Batman episode) that
you can't read in your dreams because dreams happen in one hemisphere
of the brain and reading happens in the other.
David Pacheco
says...
> Rumor has it (and by rumor, I mean an animated Batman episode) that
> you can't read in your dreams because dreams happen in one hemisphere
> of the brain and reading happens in the other.
WAAAH! That means that Roger Douglas can read all my dreams!
SEKRIT NOTE TO ROGER: that whole thing with the sheep and the electric
razor and the handcuffs is a nightmare, really... I don't enjoy it AT
ALL.
What would happen if I dreamt of a toilet flushing? Would Roger
dream of spinning around in the opposite direction? I hope so!
-dp.
If dreams happen in
only half your btain,
doesn't that make it
a demisphere?
Dag ]gren FYSI
> Indeed. When I'm doing research, I sometimes dream I find a book or
> folder that has the information I've been trying to find, and then
> when I try to read it, the text disolves into nonsence after the first
> few words, and I say "Whaa! I'm only DREAMING I found the information!".
> It's very frustrating not to be able to read in my dreams.
Hey, that's nothing. I once had a dream where someone tried to explain
kibology to me.
Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
should get professional help.
I also had this really annoying dream where something had happened,
something really bad, while I wasn't around and I was running around
trying to find someone who could tell me what it was, and when I finally
found someone who could, I woke up in mid-sentence.
--
I)/\(, - Dag Agren - dag...@abo.fi - Goaway on IRC
Please don't go to http://www.abo.fi/~dagren/
-> Legalize oregano! <-
twi...@sound.net
dag...@abo.fi wrote:
> Carlos "Froggy" May (fro...@praline.no.neosoft.com) wrote:
> > Indeed. When I'm doing research, I sometimes dream I find a book or
> > folder that has the information I've been trying to find, and then
> > when I try to read it, the text disolves into nonsence after the first
> > few words, and I say "Whaa! I'm only DREAMING I found the information!".
> > It's very frustrating not to be able to read in my dreams.
>
> Hey, that's nothing. I once had a dream where someone tried to explain
> kibology to me.
>
> Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
> should get professional help.
>
> I also had this really annoying dream where something had happened,
> something really bad, while I wasn't around and I was running around
> trying to find someone who could tell me what it was, and when I finally
> found someone who could, I woke up in mid-sentence.
>
Dag, you should really think about laying off the oregano. Seriously.
> --
> I)/\(, - Dag Agren - dag...@abo.fi - Goaway on IRC
> Please don't go to http://www.abo.fi/~dagren/
> -> Legalize oregano! <-
>
-----------== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==----------
Roger Douglas
>In article <71ja94$i9t$1...@nnrp02.primenet.com>, ni...@primenet.com
>says...
>> Rumor has it (and by rumor, I mean an animated Batman episode) that
>> you can't read in your dreams because dreams happen in one hemisphere
>> of the brain and reading happens in the other.
>
>WAAAH! That means that Roger Douglas can read all my dreams!
>
>SEKRIT NOTE TO ROGER: that whole thing with the sheep and the electric
>razor and the handcuffs is a nightmare, really... I don't enjoy it AT
>ALL.
Nor do the sheep!
>
>What would happen if I dreamt of a toilet flushing? Would Roger
>dream of spinning around in the opposite direction? I hope so!
You know, I've never understood this thing about toilets spinning round. I
mean, I know you Europeens and Merkins are sophisticated and have all this
smart technology and stuff, but what exactly is the advantage of a spinning
toilet? The old traditional fixed Austrian dunny is good enough for us!
OK if you're rich you can have mahogany instead of pine (or maybe Tasmanian
Cherrywood, or some such, if you're a real yuppy pooftah) and the Australian
Financial Review hung on the nail instead the Telegraph. Though they do say
the Melbourne Age has softer paper and less smudgy ink. Bloody arty farty
Melbourne wankers. Typical!
Where was I?
Oh yes. I suppose with the Olympics being held here in 2000 (if the
millenium bug fails to destroy civilization) we shall have to equip the
whole of Perth with spinning toilets for the foreign visitors, not to
mention those bidet things that the frogs use to wash their feet in.
Where will it all end?
Copyalater,
--R.
dph...@my-dejanews.com
dag...@abo.fi wrote:
> Carlos "Froggy" May (fro...@praline.no.neosoft.com) wrote:
> > Indeed. When I'm doing research, I sometimes dream I find a book or
> > folder that has the information I've been trying to find, and then
> > when I try to read it, the text disolves into nonsence after the first
> > few words, and I say "Whaa! I'm only DREAMING I found the information!".
> > It's very frustrating not to be able to read in my dreams.
>
> Hey, that's nothing. I once had a dream where someone tried to explain
> kibology to me.
>
> Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
> should get professional help.
>
for your niece. HTH.
> I also had this really annoying dream where something had happened,
> something really bad, while I wasn't around and I was running around
> trying to find someone who could tell me what it was, and when I finally
> found someone who could, I woke up in mid-sentence.
>
> --
> I)/\(, - Dag Agren - dag...@abo.fi - Goaway on IRC
> Please don't go to http://www.abo.fi/~dagren/
> -> Legalize oregano! <-
>
--
--dph.
(preferred email: dhayes AT iname DOT com)
The Avocado Avenger
>Carlos "Froggy" May (fro...@praline.no.neosoft.com) wrote:
>> Indeed. When I'm doing research, I sometimes dream I find a book or
>> folder that has the information I've been trying to find, and then
>> when I try to read it, the text disolves into nonsence after the first
>> few words, and I say "Whaa! I'm only DREAMING I found the information!".
>> It's very frustrating not to be able to read in my dreams.
>Hey, that's nothing. I once had a dream where someone tried to explain
>kibology to me.
>Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
>should get professional help.
This should probably fall under the heading of "Return of Short,
Shameful Confessions: The Quickening", but...
I had a dream last night with Claude Raines. THAT kind of dream. THAT
Claude Raines.
This is the reason I hope there isn't an afterlife. Because my version
of the afterlife is that people (the dead ones) get to find out basically
whatever they want to, as long as they ask the question. So when you die,
the first thing you find out is if OJ really did it, and then who really
shot JFK, then the secret ingredient in Coca-Cola. But my paranoid mind
can see only the spirit of Claude Raines, having an emotional breakdown
because some stupid chyk in Kansas just dreamt about doing the nasty with
him.
I'm so ashamed.
syadoz
The Avocado Avenger wrote:
>
> This should probably fall under the heading of "Return of Short,
> Shameful Confessions: The Quickening", but...
> I had a dream last night with Claude Raines. THAT kind of dream. THAT
> Claude Raines.
> This is the reason I hope there isn't an afterlife. Because my version
> of the afterlife is that people (the dead ones) get to find out basically
> whatever they want to, as long as they ask the question. So when you die,
> the first thing you find out is if OJ really did it, and then who really
> shot JFK, then the secret ingredient in Coca-Cola. But my paranoid mind
> can see only the spirit of Claude Raines,
you could SEE HIM???? Did you warm him up with some trite candles so that he
would get all yellowy?
Syadoz
Dr. Phibes
But my paranoid mind
>> can see only the spirit of Claude Raines,
>
>you could SEE HIM???? Did you warm him up with some trite candles so that
he
>would get all yellowy?
or was he horribly disfigured, with a mask? and did he play the piano in the
basement surrounded by trite candles? and did you find out he secretly had
a thing for raoul and was only passing the time with you so you would stop
singing in that awful mezzosoprano?
http://members.tripod.com/~zusty
ah, the bounty of the sea!
the Ur-Beatle
write in alt.religion.kibology:
:)But my paranoid mind
:)>> can see only the spirit of Claude Raines,
:)>you could SEE HIM???? Did you warm him up with some trite candles
:)>so that he would get all yellowy?
:)or was he horribly disfigured, with a mask? and did he play the
:)piano in the basement surrounded by trite candles?
that's the wrong Claude Raines.
you're thinking of the Claude Raines who was known as "Lon Chaney, Sr."
until he gave birth to a boy that just happened to have the same name,
at which point he changed his name to Andrew Lloyd Webster and disguised
himself as a midget black person who lived with John Madden.
--
You would think rubber woULD noT ApPRoVe Canada.
His Most Feathered Eminence, the Ur-Beatle
High Holy Hekkador of alt.slack
Matt McIrvin
>Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
>should get professional help.
Matt McIrvin quietly turns from the monitor and places the first
Finnish pin in his Global Dream Map.
The Avocado Avenger
>But my paranoid mind
>>> can see only the spirit of Claude Raines,
>>
>>you could SEE HIM???? Did you warm him up with some trite candles so that
>he
>>would get all yellowy?
>or was he horribly disfigured, with a mask? and did he play the piano in the
>basement surrounded by trite candles? and did you find out he secretly had
>a thing for raoul and was only passing the time with you so you would stop
>singing in that awful mezzosoprano?
WANTED: Horribly disfigured Claude Rains look-alike for passionate
evening of candles and piano and slight cannibalism. No freaks.
(Yes, I know, I spelled Claude Rains wrong in the first post. But get
this: he's the star of the month on TCM in November. So if I don't post
much on Usenet in November... just don't think about it too much. It'll
give you hives.)
James Kibo Parry
>
> Dag ]gren FYSI (dag...@abo.fi) wrote:
> >
> > Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
> > should get professional help.
>
> Matt McIrvin quietly turns from the monitor and places the first
> Finnish pin in his Global Dream Map.
Hey! Matt! Your constellation of pushpins violates my compliation
copyright on the pushpins in my Global Nuclear Warhead Targeting Map!
So you better move one from Perth to Antarctica or something.
I'll sue you if you rip off my nuclear holocaust!
-- K.
ALSO I HOLD ALL THE PATENTS ON ALL BOMB SHELTERS!
AND I'M HOLDING THEM RIGHT OVER THIS CANDLE SO
IF YOU TRY ANYTHING I'LL BURN THEM ALL AND THEN
NOBODY WILL BE ABLE TO BUILD BOMB SHELTERS!
Dag ]gren FYSI
> > something really bad, while I wasn't around and I was running around
> > trying to find someone who could tell me what it was, and when I finally
> > found someone who could, I woke up in mid-sentence.
This is more ironic than you may think.
Present public attitude prevents me from saying more.
Louis Nick III
>Copyalater,
>
>--R.
This is just a note to inform you that the FBI is watching you.
Copyalation with David Pacheco without first marrying him is illegal in
several of the United States of Merka.
No, I mean, they're really watching you. Starting putting things on top
of other things immediately; you're on film!
--
"You can't FLING fun or SLAP fun or even MASSAGE FUN INTO someone, but
you can POKE fun." - James 'Kibo' Parry <ki...@world.std.com>
LOOK AT THIS GUY WHO'S SO PATHETIC HE DOESN'T HAVE ANYONE TO LAUGH AT!
=== Louis Nick III alt.religion.louis-nick sun...@seanet.com ===
Louis Nick III
>In article <71mleo$h...@josie.abo.fi>, dag...@abo.fi wrote:
>
>>should get professional help.
>
>Matt McIrvin quietly turns from the monitor and places the first
>Finnish pin in his Global Dream Map.
Little did anyone suspect that the Places that Matt McIrvin had pinned
(IYKWIM) on the Map were the precise same Locations that a V-2 would
fall. Maybe not Today, maybe not next Week, but some-Day.
Note: The preceding paragraph has been compressed for maximum
referencial density. Only similarly dense people may attempt rapid
comprehension. For the rest of you, you'll have to trust that it was
funny, yet not so funny as to fail to justify this paragraph also.
-Louis (Peter Lorre will now get captured by Germans)
Jonadab the Unsightly One
> Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
> should get professional help.
I always thought that sort of weirdness was normal in dreams...
> I also had this really annoying dream where something had happened,
> something really bad, while I wasn't around and I was running around
> trying to find someone who could tell me what it was, and when I finally
> found someone who could, I woke up in mid-sentence.
Heh. Cool.
If zerospam.com bounces substitute bright.net
-- Jonadab the Unsightly One
.Nisaba Merrieweather
Roger Douglas <rdou...@magna.com.au> wrote in article
<363edc5c...@news.magna.com.au>...
> >SEKRIT NOTE TO ROGER: that whole thing with the sheep and the electric
> >razor and the handcuffs is a nightmare, really... I don't enjoy it AT
> >ALL.
>
> Nor do the sheep!
>
> You know, I've never understood this thing about toilets spinning round.
I
> mean, I know you Europeens and Merkins are sophisticated and have all
this
> smart technology and stuff, but what exactly is the advantage of a
spinning
> toilet? The old traditional fixed Austrian dunny is good enough for us!
<delighted look> Another escapee!
But what's this about Austrian dunnies? I'll have to ask my viennese friend
if they have "dunnies" in ausrtia, or if there is a more elegant-sounding
German word for it.
--
.Nisaba Merrieweather
nis...@tac.com.au
Roger Douglas
>In alt.religion.kibology, Roger Douglas <rdou...@magna.com.au> wrote:
>>Copyalater,
>>
>>--R.
>
>This is just a note to inform you that the FBI is watching you.
>Copyalation with David Pacheco without first marrying him is illegal in
>several of the United States of Merka.
>
>No, I mean, they're really watching you. Starting putting things on top
>of other things immediately; you're on film!
I'm gonna be a STAR, Mamma! You hear me, Mamma, I'm GOING TO BE A STAR!!!!
Memo to self: start dressing under the bedclothes again.
--R.
Michael Straight
On Wed, 4 Nov 1998, Matt McIrvin wrote:
> In article <71mleo$h...@josie.abo.fi>, dag...@abo.fi wrote:
>
> >Of course, in that dream Matt McIrvin was dating my niece, so I guess I
> >should get professional help.
>
> Matt McIrvin quietly turns from the monitor and places the first
> Finnish pin in his Global Dream Map.
Ouch!
SMTIRCAHIAGEHLT
Francesco Benvenuto
in alt.religion.kibology,alt.dreams,
mmci...@world.std.com (Matt McIrvin) wrote:
$ I've had frequent dreams about fixing bugs in my own brain's software,
$ which seems to be written in C. Usually the C code in question is some
$ jumbled version of something I was just working on, only it somehow runs
$ on a biological system, and I have no idea how one gets the binary in
$ there (is there a flash ROM?)
Possibly a flesh ROM?
--
fB
twi...@sound.net
BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!
I'm sorry, but no exceptions. Nothing personal.
--Terri
.
Chris Franks
> > Possibly a flesh ROM?
>
> BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!
>
> I'm sorry, but no exceptions. Nothing personal.
>
> --Terri
OK, so we know what you do for single puns. What is your reaction to
triple puns? viz:
An old Texas rancher decided to retire and let his 3 boys carry on the
family tradition of beef cattle farming. As he was filing court papers
to deed the property to the boys, the clerk reminded him that he needed
to record a name for the spread. "Well, that is obvious!" said the
rancher. "We'll just call it 'Focus' ".
"What's so obvious about 'Focus'?"
"It's where the sun's rays meet!!"
Pope Emperor FrogMaN
sche...@2cowherd.com (Sarah Cherlin) was abducted by psychotic Alfs
("yo!"), anally probed, and decreed:
>On Mon, 23 Nov 1998 09:09:16 -0800, Chris Franks <chris_...@hp.com>
>wrote:
>
>>
>> "It's where the sun's rays meet!!"
>
>
> _..-@********@-.._
> (@@@****~~~~~~****@@@)
> (@@****~~~~~~~~~~~~****@@)
> (@***~~~~~~~BLAM~~~~~~****@)
> (@@**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~***@@)
> (@**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**@)
> (~*****~)) ((~*****~)
> `-****' | | '****-`
> | |
> __| |__
> /~~~~~~~~~~\
> \~~~~~~~~~~/
> | |
> ___ | | ___
> ____(~~~\( )/~~~)____
> (~~~********************~~~)
On my newsreader, this illustration looks like a really bad picture of
Gene Shallit. Which makes it even funnier.
========================================================
"Please don't post this!" -- Dorothy Defoy
"KRAFT FOODS -- A SANDWICH OF FRIENDS" -- Reynard D. Fox
Pope Emperor FrogMaN the ZermaCroYd GuavaHeaD, XXXVIII
Patron Saint of Easy Cheese, Burrowing Worms, and those
edible candy necklaces. Founder and King God of the Order
of the Burrowing Worm and Holy Guava.
http://home.earthlink.net/~rtoad/
BRAND NEW TIM BROWN WACKINESS! AND KIBOLOGY!!!
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED OR DOUBLE YOUR MONEY BACK!!!
========================================================
Chris Franks
> >wrote:
> >
> >>
> >> "It's where the sun's rays meet!!"
> >
> >
> > _..-@********@-.._
> > (@@@****~~~~~~****@@@)
> > (@@****~~~~~~~~~~~~****@@)
> > (@***~~~~~~~BLAM~~~~~~****@)
> > (@@**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~***@@)
> > (@**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**@)
> > (~*****~)) ((~*****~)
> > `-****' | | '****-`
> > | |
> > __| |__
> > /~~~~~~~~~~\
> > \~~~~~~~~~~/
> > | |
> > ___ | | ___
> > ____(~~~\( )/~~~)____
> > (~~~********************~~~)
>
> On my newsreader, this illustration looks like a really bad picture of
> Gene Shallit. Which makes it even funnier.
I thought it was Snoopy on my Netscape at first! But when I used
message reply, it straightened out and became what she obviously put in.
I started out with nothing, and still have most of it left.
Sarah Cherlin
wrote:
>Pope Emperor FrogMaN wrote:<chris_...@hp.com>
Proportional fonts are evil. EVVIILLLLLLLL!!!
Don't make me come over there. I have a black belt in ASCII art.
--
Sarah Cherlin sche...@2cowherd.com ICQ 2412039
James Kibo Parry
>
> Sarah Cherlin (sche...@2cowherd.com) retaliated for the
> posting of every high school physics teacher's favorite pun:
> >
> > Chris Franks (chris_...@hp.com) wrote:
> > >
> > > "It's where the sun's rays meet!!"
> >
> >
> > _..-@********@-.._
> > (@@@****~~~~~~****@@@)
> > (@@****~~~~~~~~~~~~****@@)
> > (@***~~~~~~~BLAM~~~~~~****@)
> > (@@**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~***@@)
> > (@**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**@)
> > (~*****~)) ((~*****~)
> > `-****' | | '****-`
> > | |
> > __| |__
> > /~~~~~~~~~~\
> > \~~~~~~~~~~/
> > | |
> > ___ | | ___
> > ____(~~~\( )/~~~)____
> > (~~~********************~~~)
>
> On my newsreader, this illustration looks like a really bad picture of
> Gene Shallit.
Hell, in *MY* newsreader *everything* looks like a really bad picture of
Gene Shalit.
Didja ever notice there are no good pictures of Gene Shalit?
Don't make me travel in time back to high school and do my impression
of him on TV again. I'm sorry, but one of our only three props was a
push broom, and the other was a big wig. (The third was a window,
which "Dutch" Verbeck wrecked by throwing it out a window to the
accompaniment of "Ride of the Valyries".)
> Which makes it even funnier.
NOTHING IS FUNNIER THAN A DEFORMED GENE SHALIT!!!
The nuclear explosion released a cloud of Activated Deformitons, which
went into Gene Shalit's head, and as we all remember from high school
physics, acitvated deformitons are the only force that can transmit
deformity. Gene Shalit's head rapidly became asymmetrical, lumpy, and
even multiply connected (topologically equivalent to a box of donuts
and a pack of frankfurters at the same time, but not in the way you think.)
One of his eyes became large and elliptical while the other became
small and ellipsoidal. His mustache went up his nose. It tickled
him, but he was so deformed that instead of laughing he began to dance.
IT WAS NOT A FUNNY DANCE. That's what made it so funny!
-- K.
Funny dances are never funny, unless
they involve a banana peel at one end
of a bowling alley and a vat of
activated deformitons at the other
and are performed by the cast of "Cats".
Chris Franks
>
> Proportional fonts are evil. EVVIILLLLLLLL!!!
>
> Don't make me come over there. I have a black belt in ASCII art.
Come over any time. We'll DO lunch. We have a great cafeteria
here, run by Marriott and partially subsidized by HP.
I'm trying to get the keys to the roof hatch. My scheme is to get a
large illuminated H and a large P and put them on the roof, and then
turn off the lights in the P. It would be at about the level of 280
where it rises up to go over Stevens Crik.
dph...@my-dejanews.com
There's no 'P' in 'Hewlett ackard', please help us keep it that way.
--
--dph. (Somebody had to say it -- I wish it hadn't been me)
(preferred email: dhayes AT iname DOT com)
-----------== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==----------
Chris Franks
> --dph. (Somebody had to say it -- I wish it hadn't been me)
>
> (preferred email: dhayes AT iname DOT com)
Make up your mind, is there a p in dhayes, and should we keep it that
way?
syadoz
Chris Franks wrote:
Come over any time. We'll DO lunch. We have a great cafeteria
> here, run by Marriott and partially subsidized by HP.
> I'm trying to get the keys to the roof hatch. My scheme is to get a
> large illuminated H and a large P and put them on the roof, and then
> turn off the lights in the P. It would be at about the level of 280
> where it rises up to go over Stevens Crik.
Is he related to Hippo Krik?
Chris Franks
>
> Chris Franks wrote:
> > where it rises up to go over Stevens Crik.
>
> Is he related to Hippo Krik?
pain-in-the-neck, a crik. The hippie kriks are still found up near
Haight-Ashbury, unless you are thinking of Kaptain Krik, who showed up
here at Great America 2 years ago and was worse in person than he ever
was on the small or large screen.