Great Bluedini

[Karll The Ghoull]

IGNORE (For the test groups or, perhaps, just good advice.)

Soda Series Volume IV, Issue #2.

"Great Bluedini"

The room is pitch black. The Ghoull sits quietly in his bed while
electrons beam into a photo-sensitive material that creates light waves
which travel to Ghoull's eyes. His ears hear "Commander, we will be
within planetary range within one Centon, do we break from light speed?"

"NO." Comes the stern reply from Commander Adama.

While driving through Pittsburgh he realizes how stupid people are
these days. In particular, the stupid people who come out at night
and stand in front of your head beams on back streets while waving
their hands thinking to themselves how fun this is. Well, Ghoull
took care of that. He doesn't think these kids will be doing that
for a while, after all, he did skim the curb.

Later, Karll The Ghoull and Goofy rumage the halls of Toys (were) Us.
While trying to figure out what florecent colored pencil Ghoull wished
to buy, he accidentally knocked off Jibber Jabber. Jibber Jabber screamed.

"What was that?!?" inquires Goofy.

"Um..er... Jibber...umm. Jabber?" replies The Ghoull.

Ghoull picks up the long necked dodo headed thingy.

"Put your hands around my neck and shake me!" reads the box.

Ghoull does that and is startled to learn that for $14.95 you too can
buy a doll that gags, chokes, and screams whenever you choke it.

"I never talk! I just gag!" Says the back cover.

"This is sick!" Cries Ghoull. "Recommended for 18 months or older."
"That is VERY sick. No wonder society is messed up. Who the hell makes
this stuff and then gives it to their child?"

. . . Meanwhile in an arcade somewhere... someone kicks a Centipede machine
in the coin receptacle and the machine responds with a "BLEHCH!". . .

Back at College... Ghoull pages through the pretty colored course selection
guide looking for things to take that are not required by his major.

"Hmm... There aren't any good Sex-Ed classes!"

"Besides, the teacher I want to have . . um.. caugh..er..to take it with
is no longer here."

"Where's 'Advanced Female Sexual Response 497' 5 Credits, LAB"
asks Ghoull.

"Why 'Advanced'," asks Roomie with a smerk.

"Well, cause 'Intro 101' just has 'pin the organ on the body outline,'"
quips Ghoull. "hehehhehe I want to demonstrate the chapter on Ice Cubes
and Magic Shell."

"Well what does you advisor say?"

"Advisor?"

"YEAH!"

"Oh, the guy who tells you to take 'Forest Management' when I'm Computer
Engineering...yeah..him... dunno. Maybe I'll ask the guys on alt.drinks.
kool-aid. They seem to know what they are doing... they warned me about
'Great Bluedini.'"

Ghoull quickly registers for classes and then decides that the perfect
Artificial Intelligence Personality would be Clinton and Clinton's Value
System. Ghoull sets out to play with LISP.

With a fridge stocked with Goebel Lager, its going to be a good night.

. . .

"Fleeing from the PSU tyranny, Karll The Ghoull leads a rag tag team
of followers to a distant shining blue state of being, known as Reality."

-The Ghoull Hath Spoken.