Strange Ruling
Michael Cash
his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
himself. The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
--
Michael Cash
"I used to have a dog named Michael Cash."
Prof. Ernest T. Bass
Mount Pilot College
http://www.sunfield.ne.jp/~mike/
Darrien
> his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
> himself.
>
How much "DNA" are we talking about?
> The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
>
This reminds me of an episode of "The Man Show" where they
were advertising "Manly" ways to die when you got too old.
The company could set you up with:
Skydiving accident
Alligator wrestling mishap
Hunting accident
or
Whorehouse heart-attack
Kevin Gowen
> A Buddhist priest was found dead, a porno magazine in his left hand,
> his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
> himself. The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
Was he one of those erotic asphyxiation types?
What brand of magazine?
--
Kevin Gowen
John W.
> A Buddhist priest was found dead, a porno magazine in his left hand,
> his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
> himself. The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
>
John W.
Eric Takabayashi
What does the Mainichi reader say to this instead?
Elderly man kills wife for not making breakfast
MITO -- A 74-year-old man who fatally struck his wife with a lump of wood because she didn't make him breakfast
has been arrested, police said.
The eldest son of Kiyoko Kataoka visited his parents' home in Hitachi, Ibaraki Prefecture, shortly before 5
p.m., Thursday, and found his 63-year-old mother, who was bleeding from the head, dead.
Kevin Gowen
I don't know what the Mainichi reader says, but I am appalled.
--
Kevin Gowen
Eric Takabayashi
Unfortunately, the man is likely to be fed on a regular basis in prison.
Kevin Gowen
Now I am even more appalled, if that is possible.
--
Kevin Gowen
Eric Takabayashi
It is too bad you did not see the documentary about a jail in Onomichi,
Hiroshima, in mid December. Here is what I wrote about it:
Tamori and Yuko Endo's Super News Special tonight from 7 to 9 pm had among
its features elderly shoplifters, multiple personality disorder, fraudulent
fur salespeople, o-gyaru and women who can't clean up.
They also had a feature on Onomichi Prison. I hadn't even ever heard (and
I've asked around) that there was a prison so near by.
Onomichi Prison is basically described as an old folks' home. (The exact
nomenclature was not "keimusho".) The average age of inmates is 72 years
old, and men were openly shown hobbling around and grabbing at provided
handrails along the walls. One old man could not make it through roll call,
and hobbled back to his work station to sit on a stool. The oldest inmate
is 86.
Being a prison, they work six hours a day making handcrafts such as
beadwork, with a two hour break, during which they were shown playing
shogi, reading the paper or just walking around.
They are held in private cells of three tatami in size, plus a toilet. A
reproduction was set up in the studio. There is a bookshelf/butsudan on
wall, and a TV. Because of their age, there is a handrail next to the
toilet, which could be used as a weapon under other circumstances. They
also have four blankets instead of three, as well as a hot water bottle.
They are allowed two baths a week, in what looks like a perfectly ordinary
small bath house finished in wood.
Dinner is served at half past four. Their food is also made to be soft,
liquid, or cut small, and specially prepared for people with bad teeth. A
sample meal (teriyaki!) was provided in the studio, which Tamori and the
others declared "Oishi, Oishi!" "I could eat this every day" claimed
Tamori.
Some inmates were allowed to be interviewed, on camera. They seemed like
normal old men (with tattoos). "Freedom is best" said one, but a couple
said life in prison was better. Some men were shown standing on what looked
like a storage shed, holding themselves up and peering over the barbed wire
topped wall. The wall was covered with colorful murals of cartoon
characters.
Guards were not interviewed, and the place looked on the inside, for all
intents and purposes, like an old folk's home.
Outside the prison is a large nameless gravestone for deceased inmates.
A crying 72 year own man was shown being released from prison. It was his
15th time in prison, and he'd been in prison since he was a young man. He
put on an old green suit, a black leather (!) shirt and tie, and picked up
the 69,000 yen (his last salary) he came in with three years earlier.
Stylish old fella.
The camera crew tagged along. He squatted down at the train platform
suddenly, complaining of nausea. His body was not used to the rhythm of
life outside, he said.
Riding the train, he began to brighten looking at the scenery. It's good,
he said. Arriving in Shimonoseki, he promised to try not to go back to
prison.
That was in spring. Eight months later, the camera crew went to check on
him at his home.
His home was a hovel, completely constructed of rusting corrugated roofing.
All was silent.
A neighbor said he was back in prison, about a month after he got home, for
shoplifting.
They let themselves into the house, exactly as he had left it, full of
trash and debris. The house had no water, no gas, and no electricity. He
had had no money or food, and lived on handouts from neighbors. He left a
postcard apologizing to the neighbor. Just before he would have gone on
public assistance, he stole a razor and other things from the supermarket.
Originally held in Shimonoseki, he was returned for another three years to
Onomichi Prison.
[snip]
Particularly in a place like Japan where prisons have a reputation for
being so tough, it is pathetic that old men would consider prison a better
place to be than outside.
John W.
> "John W." wrote:
>
> > Michael Cash <mike...@sunfield.ne.jp> wrote in message news:<dfbedvo8unr7h4ogj...@4ax.com>...
> > > A Buddhist priest was found dead, a porno magazine in his left hand,
> > > his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
> > > himself. The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
> > >
> > What a way to go.
>
> What does the Mainichi reader say to this instead?
>
She obviously had it coming. I mean, no friggin breakfast? Sheesh.
Actually I've met many men like this, though I doubt any would go so
far as to kill their wife. There are members of my family that will
not have breakfast otherwise, and will complain about it.
John W.
Michael Cash
<kgowen...@myfastmail.com> gasped and wheezed:
>Michael Cash wrote:
>> A Buddhist priest was found dead, a porno magazine in his left hand,
>> his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
>> himself. The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
>
>Was he one of those erotic asphyxiation types?
No, the cause of death was listed as "self-inflicted cumshot in the
temple". Police have since called the coroner's ruling into question;
further examination of the scene turned up a chicken having signs of
genital trauma and a gait that was strange, even for a chicken. Police
now suspect that there may have been some fowl play involved.
>
>What brand of magazine?
Juggs
Kevin Gowen
> On Fri, 30 May 2003 09:46:12 -0400, "Kevin Gowen"
> <kgowen...@myfastmail.com> gasped and wheezed:
>
>> Michael Cash wrote:
>>> A Buddhist priest was found dead, a porno magazine in his left hand,
>>> his pecker in his right hand, and with "DNA" splattered all over
>>> himself. The medical examiner ruled the death a suicide.
>>
>> Was he one of those erotic asphyxiation types?
>
> No, the cause of death was listed as "self-inflicted cumshot in the
> temple". Police have since called the coroner's ruling into question;
> further examination of the scene turned up a chicken having signs of
> genital trauma and a gait that was strange, even for a chicken. Police
> now suspect that there may have been some fowl play involved.
Somewhere around here I have a book of Japanese slang and some of the
raunchiest terms are in the chapter of slang used by Buddhish priests.
>> What brand of magazine?
>
> Juggs
A foreign magazine, then.
--
Kevin Gowen
Eric Takabayashi
Might it be: Japanese Slang Uncensored by Peter Constantine?
Kevin Gowen
It might. I'd have to check. FWIW, the Japanese I encountered IRL did not
particularly jibe with anything a slang book ever had to tell me.
--
Kevin Gowen
John Yamamoto-Wilson
> FWIW, the Japanese I encountered IRL did not
> particularly jibe with anything a slang book ever had to tell me.
We Brits are not hip to "jibing". My dictionary tells me this localism means
the same as "agree", so I guess the books weren't much good at ground level?
Just out of interest, has anyone hit on anything that *is* any good at
ground level? It seems to me that "slang" and "dialect" aren't so
differentiated in Japanese, so any book of slang is basically going to be
highly regional. I told a lecture hall full of students in Tokyo that in my
part of Saitama (just a stone's throw from West Tokyo) people rolled their
"r"s, Spanish-style, and I honestly didn't see anything except blank
non-recognition in their faces (though their laughter when I said "Arrrre?!"
might have indicated that some of them, at least, had heard it before). But
"arrrre" is as much a part of the patois as "suge" for "sugoi".
Any slang dictionary that didn't record "suge" would surely be deficient
(since it is widely used, not only in Tokyo, but other areas), but are there
others that really get to grips with different varieties of non-"standard"
Japanese and variations outside the areas where "standard" Japanese is the
norm?
Eric Takabayashi
> FWIW, the Japanese I encountered IRL did not
> particularly jibe with anything a slang book ever had to tell me.
Considering the evolution of slang, particularly as it pertains to modern
culture, I would not expect it to. High school girl fashion trends can last
years longer than teen slang.
As for Constantine's books, he researched people in adult entertainment and
criminal elements, as well as the clergy for their obscure terms. I wouldn't
expect such language to be useful to me.
Ed
> Kevin Gowen wrote:
>
> > FWIW, the Japanese I encountered IRL did not
> > particularly jibe with anything a slang book ever had to tell me.
>
> Considering the evolution of slang, particularly as it pertains to modern
> culture, I would not expect it to. High school girl fashion trends can
last
> years longer than teen slang.
oooo haaaa!