*F* Ealing 3.1416 (27th July 1996)
Colm Buckley
Well, it's now 12:20am on Sunday morning, we've just returned home (to
Colette's house - a Big Thank You, Colette, for allowing me to stay
with you) from the latest Ealing/Wheatsheaf meeting. Your Humble
Narrator in this instance is Colm Buckley, but I am being ably
assisted by Alan the Bellinghman, Colette the Net.Goddess, Emmet
O'Brien, Ivis R. Bohlen, Robert Rune Collier, and my
more-than-wonderful girlfriend Claire, who isn't yet an afpette, but
plans to join in the near future.
We (myself, Claire, Colette, Alan, Emmet and Ivis) proceeded to the
Wheatsheaf at approximately 19:30 hours on Saturday evening, to
discover Alex TEH, Bryan, Simon Callan and Adrian Wragg waiting for us
- in a corner beside the toilets. Introductions and reintroductions
were made, and we started to Plan our Occupation of the Wheatsheaf.
The almost immediate arrival of Tony Miller (AFP's Reliable Witness),
his lovely girlfriend Becky, and Rob Collier added significant impetus
to these plans, as we were then able to occupy two tables - later
arrivals allowed us to fill the entire back section of the pub.
Con photographs were produced by YHN, Emmet, Alan Kat and Rob, and
were much admired by all. My efforts to maintain a time-ordering on
my photographs were quickly thwarted by the assembled multitudes - in
future I shall adopt Rob's ruse of sequentially numbering the
photos...
Our numbers continued to swell, bolstered by Kat, Richard Kettlewell,
The Damerell, Helen Highwater, Tim Hunt, Rob the Ergonomist, Ben of
Bens, David Sullivan and FTony... all of whom were delighted to make
the acquaintance of the lovely Ivis, whom Emmet claims to have been
the cause of the whole meet...
At this point, Kat enquired of YHN, with considerable menace, as to
the location of the chocolate truffles which had been manufactured by
Irish afper Dónal Cunningham for the delectation of the meeting...
whereupon I realised that they had inadvertently been left in
Colette's fridge - however, a quick jaunt in a taxi retrieved the
confectionary, which was immensely enjoyed, and appreciated by all
present - except FTony, who apparently had arrived too late to share
in the delight...
As the evening progressed, multifarious alcolohic beverages were
consumed, the Damerell's hair was *finally* restrained by Claire
(that's "my" Claire, not *&)), with the aid of a beer-soaked ribbon
(from the - by now traditional - chocolate-covered coffee-beans) and
some plastic flowers stolen from the table display. The general
consensus was that the result was "very fetching". Becky provided a
Big Bag of Wine Gums; again well-received by the multitudes. A
complete and concise explanation of the $acred $criptures of the
Church of $cientology was delivered, to the general amusement of all
(YHN was sporting a dashing alt.religion.scientology T-shirt, which
provoked some comment)...
Eventually, however, the evening drew to a close, and we regretfully
began the long process of saying our goodbyes. This took quite some
time, as there was considerable confusion as to exactly who was
staying with whom; eventually, however, we got it all sorted out (at
least, I hope so), and we drifted off into the night, waving, singing,
dancing and generally working our respective ways home.
One of the notable features of this afpmeet was the way in which
everyone managed to mingle effectively; it seems that the
fractionation of previous large meets was generally avoided. A great
big welcome to Dave Sullivan, hitherto a lurker on afp, who hopefully
will join in the Great Conversation in future.
Quotes from the event, duly recorded on various Psion3A's, include :
"My left hinge is broken" - Kat
"We had the wedding all arranged, and you never turned up, you
bastard" - Alex to Adrian
"Emmet, Behave!" - Kat
"Don't worry, honey; I've got plenty of you now" - Colm to Kat
"I'll never wash it again." - Tony Miller
"You never wash it anyway!" - The Damerell
"I'll marry anyone once..." - Emmet
"I've not seen your number 2's yet" - Rob the Ergonomist to Rob@lspace
"Oh Emmet - you're prickly!" - Kat
"What a lovely tongue - can I play with it?" - Alan to Kat
"I always get them back to front; it's just habit" - Kat
"I can't handle Emmet enough" - Kat
"My groin would do anything for you" - Bryan (to everyone)
"I may look decrepit, but I'm happy" - Emmet
"That's the back of your head; I can tell by the weird way your hair
grows" - Claire to Colm
"How does he get it to stay up?" - The Damerell (about Darrell's Gala
Dinner headgear)
"An ergonomist? You mean you're a person who designs curvy things?" -
Claire to Rob T.E.
"Are you personally ergonomic?" - Claire again...
"Every time I get hugged my feet leave the floor" - and again...
I look forward to meeting you all again soon... Big Hugs in the
interim.
So, it's goodnight from me...
... and it's goodnight from him.
Goodnight!
Colm
--
Colm Buckley B.F. | EMail : Colm.B...@tcd.ie or co...@lspace.org
Computer Science | WWW : http://isg.cs.tcd.ie/cbuckley/
Trinity College | Phone : +353 87 469146 (087-469146 within Ireland)
Dublin 2, Ireland | "Microsoft : Where do you want to crash today?"
Tony Finch
Well, I think I'll add my impressions:
I came to the meet by a rather circuitous route -- from Cambridge, to
Bryanston (near Blandford in Dorset) (where a few friends and I
attempted to ring a peal, failed, but managed to get a quarter peal
and a couple of pints in), and thence to Ealing. I found my way to the
pub, and saw that it was good.
The first afper I encountered was the Damerell, who was at the bar, so
I surprised him and bought a beer. I went through to find a large part
of the pub filled with weird, geeky people. Recognising that this was
my true environment, I greeted them [1]
I was told that I looked smart. Why is it that if you wear trousers
and an untucked shirt you are scruffy, if you wear a shirt tucked into
your trousers you are nerdy, and if you wear a shirt and trousers with
braces [2] you are smart (and also attract people with a twangy
elastic fetish)? Anyway, I bought a beer.
Emmet was busy telling people how I was debauched at the Ipswich
party. I decided I didn't want to hear exactly how he was blackening
my name (so I bought a beer), but I *would* like to make it clear that
it was *me* who tripped over the white line in the middle of the road,
and not Nina. I should know: it hurt.
Photographs from the Con were shown. I saw Darrel's amazing erection
[3] for the first time and Joann looking gorgeous on the arms of
various eminent men, and Paul looking put upon in the custard, and a
particularly amusing picture which I nominated as suitable material
for a caption competition, to wide enthusiasm. Thus uplifted, I
bought a beer to celebrate.
After many other things happened [4] we started being kicked out. I
had managed to cadge a floor for the night from Alex TEH (for which
many thanks), so I trooped off with him, Susa^H^H^Himon Callan, ?Tim?
and Helen Highwater (who tried to persuade me to tell her what my .sig
is about, but all I would say is that it's a dreadfuk pune, and that
there are several sorts of credit card). We travelled via Burger King
(without collecting crowns this time) to Alex's flat. We partook of
conversation and tea until bedtime was declared. I was duly given a
floor, but I also had a sleeping bag and a big soft blanket to sleep
on. Luxury! Kids of today, don't know their born, etc. etc.
FTony.
--
Aaaargh! I am struck down by the curse of the inverted credit card!
[1] repeatdly -- there is a certain number, known as the clique point,
which denotes the maximum number of people that can converse without
breaking up into smaller groups. This varies depending on the people,
topic, and environment of the conversation, and for afp it seems to be
two.
[2] No, not a dental appliance. Colm's grilf seemed to think I was
wearing suspenders, but I assured her that I am not in the habit of
wearing sexy women's underwear. Unfortuntely, she didn't want to check
this for herself.
[3] made of balloons (the same sort the twisting of which caused me to
be threatened with the scorpion pit) and worn on his head. No
pornography here please, this is a family newsgroup.
[4] If you want to know what they were, tough. You're reading the
wrong post.