rec.woodworking disclaimer FAQ
Tad
Archive-name: woodworking/disclaimer.faq
Last-modified: 28 Apr 1998
Posting-Frequency: once.
URL: None.
rec.woodworking disclaimer FAQ:
Frequently asked questions about disclaimer use on
rec.woodworking.
CONTENTS:
1) What the heck are these disclaimers anyway?
2) Do I need to add a disclaimer to every post?
3) What good does a disclaimer do me then?
4) What are some good guidelines as to the length of a disclaimer?
5) Should I have my lawyer approve my disclaimer?
6) Disclaimer to the FAQ
This FAQ is intended to point readers to disclaimer resources
available on the Internet. Hopefully it will encourage additional
use of this fine tool in future postings.
---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
1) What the heck are these disclaimers anyway?:
After a series of particularly nasty and personal flame wars involving
such seethingly juicy topics as bench dogs, holdfasts and Netiquette,
rec.woodworking was treated to a marvelously funny disclaimer at the end
of a posting by Bennett Leeds (ben...@adobe.com). Before long, other
rec.woodworking regulars such as Doug Stowe (dstowe@cswnet) and Paddy
O'Deen (od...@concentric.net) began adding disclaimers to their posts as
well. Sadly, after an initial popularity, the frequency of disclaimer
usage has fallen slightly.
This FAQ is an attempt to alleviate that oversight.
---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
2) Do I need to add a disclaimer to every post?:
No, there is currently no requirement for disclaimers in rec.woodworking
(some proponents may sharply disagree with this however). They are, however
strongly encouraged.
---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
3) What good does a disclaimer do me then?:
Normally, when one posts to a public forum like rec.woodworking it is
a good idea to scan your post one last time to make sure that you have been
clear, concise and that your tone is not mocking, insulting, threatening or
demeaning to those likely to read it. That is, of course, unless you are
_trying_ to start a flame war.
Now that disclaimers have found their way onto usenet, nobody will ever
need to bother re-scanning their messages for content, the disclaimer will
cover virtually any transgression. Feel free to attack, cajole, make fun
of, or just plain insult anybody you want. Just don't forget the
disclaimer and you'll be home free.
If anybody does actually have the nerve to respond in kind and try to
use your own words against you, just bash them over the head with your
disclaimer. Be sure to throw in some additional flamage about their
inability to read disclaimers. That should shut them up.
Disclaimers to the disclaimer are also a good idea, just to drive home
the point.
Give it a try, it can't hurt, and it's definately easier than trying to
(*gag, cough, hack*) be NICE to other people.
---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
4) What are some good guidelines as to the length of a disclaimer?
Your disclaimer should be as long as you want. After all, just think
of all the pointless flame wars that you are averting by adding this
text to the end of your message!
Go nuts. One page, two, you can do better... Why not imbed that cute
JAVA(tm) app your friend emailed you. Got a product that you're selling,
imbed a "commercial" into your disclaimer. Remember, no matter how long your
disclaimer is, you are saving all that bandwidth that would have been spent
on some stupid flame war.
If anybody complains, just point to your disclaimer. Or issue a new one.
Just think of the fun and exciting possibilities!
---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
5) Should I have my lawyer approve my disclaimer?
It couldn't hurt. Besides, you never know when a lawyer might come in
handy to harrass people^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H protect your interests.
---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
6) Disclaimer to the FAQ:
This FAQ is an (admittedly lame) attempt at humor. I apologise in advance
to those who are not amused. Flamage will go directly to /dev/null.
I also want to apologise in advance for not preparing a more humorous
disclaimer for those that would like one and for not preparing a more
serious one for those that wouldn't. If you'd have preferred not to have
seen this post at all, once again, my apologies.
Any resemblance between the names used in this document and those of
real people is purely coincidental and I disclaim any knowledge of how they
came to be in this document. Also, any description of disclaimer usage in
this FAQ is completely fabricated and similarities to actual usage on
rec.woodworking is also purely coincidental. Any events portrayed in this
FAQ are likewise figments of the authors imagination. Use of disclaimers is
at your discretion. Lawyers are our friends. Strength is weakness.
Ignorance is bliss. Fact is fiction. Resistance is futile. This post will
self destruct in 30 seconds.
[... Dun, dun, duh na, dun, dun, duh na, doodadoo, doooodadoo, duhna ...]
[Fssssszzzzzzztttttttt... *smoke* ]
tpe...@efws.com
ROFLMAO
-----== Posted via Deja News, The Leader in Internet Discussion ==-----
http://www.dejanews.com/ Now offering spam-free web-based newsreading
WJapinga
I don't usually expect humor in this group -- but this was hugely funny (of
course it's also 12:15 a.m.). Incidently, lawyers are NOT our friends. They
can be useful, however, somewhat like injecting yourself with small amounts of
(hopefully) weakened viruses so as to be immunized from a full-fledged attack
at a later date.
Why does New York have all the lawyers and New Jersey has all of the toxic
waste sites? ------ New Jersey had first choice.
We are also thinking of sending several thousand lawyers to Japan to teach them
the niceties of civil law; that should keep them busy for, Oh fifty years or
so.
Keith Bohn
WJapinga wrote:
>I don't usually expect humor in this group -- but this was hugely funny...
Where have you been?
Keith Bohn
b2d
Don Groves
In article <199805020423...@ladder03.news.aol.com>,
wjap...@aol.com says...
> We are also thinking of sending several thousand lawyers to Japan to teach them
> the niceties of civil law; that should keep them busy for, Oh fifty years or
> so.
A few years back, when they were kicking everyone's butt economically, I
read that Japan had 8 times as many engineers per capita as the U.S. and
1/25th as many lawyers. Given their current problems, maybe they're
already catching up on the lawyers.
Don Groves
groves_@_acm_._org
Michael Rinken
could someone repost? I missed the message, and are a fine consumer of humor.
WJapinga wrote:
> I don't usually expect humor in this group -- but this was hugely funny (of
> course it's also 12:15 a.m.). Incidently, lawyers are NOT our friends. They
> can be useful, however, somewhat like injecting yourself with small amounts of
> (hopefully) weakened viruses so as to be immunized from a full-fledged attack
> at a later date.
>
> Why does New York have all the lawyers and New Jersey has all of the toxic
> waste sites? ------ New Jersey had first choice.
>