[SITH WAR 2002] betrayl...
Michael Ponte (Love Machine)
Walsh has been revealed to be an EWOK!
An angry crowd surrounds Ponte and the now revealed to be an Ewok -Sean
Walsh! Ponte stops the crowd.
"Wait! This isn't an Ewok!"
He pulls a zipper on Sean-ewok's head and pulls down
"It's Halle Eisenberg!"
"I'm not Halle Eisenberg!"
Zipper again...
"I'm Halle Berry!"
Ponte begins to salivate.
"But then again, I'm not Halle Berry....."
"Whoa whoa...stop right there. Stay Halle Berry."
"Ok"
"People of Rassm City! We face a crisis! This "Leader" has taken the world
by force! We must stand up to this conquerer!" A random Rassmer steps
forward.
"Shut the hell up Ponte! Just send over Hally Berry and we will forget
everything!"
"Done. Run along Halle."
She runs over to the crowd who take her off to do ungodly things to her.
Ponte, now safe for the moment, hops in his Burrito ship and goes aboard the
Ponte Star. He enters the Overbridge where the real Sean Walsh sits in his
chair.
"Hey Sean you'll never beleive what....HEY!"
The figure in the chair is a mannequin! A note is attatched.
WALSH IS OURS!
"Why does it smell like Ham....HEY!"
Ponte pushes away the dummy and sits in his chair.
"I need a solution to all this crap. Hrm...I think I'll send my Robot after
Babbage...R5P1 will be fixed....and Jade I shall deal with personally."
--------
Ponte pushes a button and a probe flies down to the city. It lands near
McCluskey's bar, where Chuck Babbage is drinking scotch to drown his sorrows
of losing the election. The probe opens and Ponte's robot exits. It enters
the bar to recieve the usual 'we don't serve your kind here' quote which is
WAY overused, so I shall skip it. He walks over to Chuck Babbage and sits
down.
"Hello Mr. Babbage. Lord Ponte sends his greetings."
"Who are you?"
"I am the Advanced Retreival Ponte Automaton..ARPA for short."
"What do you want with me?"
"I have been ordered to find you and escort you to Lord Ponte."
"Well Well Well. The Son of Drake wants me eh?"
"Will you come along with me sir?"
"Let me see....NO!"
ARPA raises it's hand and a large net issues from a panel. It ensnares
Babbage and takes him away
"Crap! I am caught in the ARPA's NET!!!!!! good god that joke sucked
ass......"
-------
Somewhere in the slums of Rassm, the Jedi Haacker and LM2- Ponte's other
robot fight a lightsaber battle which started weeks ago in the Hall of Ham
and continues to this day....
-------
Another Ponte drone flies to R5-P1's ship and implants a virus which infects
the General's starship- disabling it for a week at least :P
------------
Ponte's personal Burrito lands outside the Hall of Ham. He steps into the
doorway and speaks
"Hello! I am Lord Ponte! Where is my Lackey!"
Ponte looks over to see Sean Walsh dancing a striptease for C'Pi's severed
head- which as one would expect, does not look amused
"Walsh!"
"Hey Mike. Be with you in a minute"
"What is going on here?"
The Archon enters
"You! You took my Walshie!"
"Yes I did."
"Well then...listen, I've been on the go for days now. Is there anything to
eat around here????"
"Are you serious?"
"Well...yeah."
Jade claps it's hands and large plates of food jsut start appearing from out
of nowhere.After the feast reaches it's midpoint, the two Sith Warriors stop
to discuss things....
-------
SUMMARY:
Drake is frozen in Carbonite and is being held by the 'Leader' who is now
President of Rassm after overthrowing James Trory.
Babbage- captured by Ponte
R5-P1- disabled by Ponte for 1 week
Haacker and LM2 still fighting in Rassm slums
Jade and Ponte have meal and are about to discuss something at the Hall of
Ham
--
Michael Ponte: The 'HAM and CHEESE' Bagel of Love.....???
Politically Correct Star Wars Fan
when I wrote mine and didn't see it until this morning. So, if you
want to carry on with our alliance do write in you contacting me about
my betraying you on the planet and work it out or simply have us
battle. Whatever is to your convenience.
The Leader
"Michael Ponte \(Love Machine\)" <super...@attbi.com> wrote in message news:<pwzf9.386230$me6.43544@sccrnsc01>...
peter
> --------
> Ponte pushes a button and a probe flies down to the city. It lands near
> McCluskey's bar, where Chuck Babbage is drinking scotch to drown his sorrows
> of losing the election.
Uh, Babbage, aka the Jedi Hacker, doesn't drink. And if he did his
synthoid body wouldn't get drunk.
PAY ATTENTION!
> -------
> Somewhere in the slums of Rassm, the Jedi Haacker and LM2- Ponte's other
> robot fight a lightsaber battle which started weeks ago in the Hall of Ham
> and continues to this day....
So that's what happened to him...
> -------
> Another Ponte drone flies to R5-P1's ship and implants a virus which infects
> the General's starship- disabling it for a week at least :P
Another problem.
- I assume the drone has a really good cloaking device, or it'd be
blasted by monster ion cannons.
- Like the Jedi Hacker, computer viruses are generally ineffective
against R5-P1s stuff.
> Babbage- captured by Ponte
We'll see about that.
>
> R5-P1- disabled by Ponte for 1 week
in dispute.
>
> Haacker and LM2 still fighting in Rassm slums
> --
Kim Le
wrote:
>Michael Ponte (Love Machine) wrote:
>> --------
>> Ponte pushes a button and a probe flies down to the city. It lands near
>> McCluskey's bar, where Chuck Babbage is drinking scotch to drown his sorrows
>> of losing the election.
>
>Uh, Babbage, aka the Jedi Hacker, doesn't drink. And if he did his
>synthoid body wouldn't get drunk.
>
>PAY ATTENTION!
Dude, you make Sith Wars suck. I thought I made my Sith War suck, but
you make your Sith Wars really suck.
-- Kim Le
Corn Flake
"Kim Le" <sq...@poik.net> wrote in message
news:C74AEBFDE6661B17.C86D982B...@lp.airnews.net...
I think he gets off on the fact that he's the most annoying Sith War
character in history.
I'm assuming you were concerned by that thought?
Jade
--
It's the "proud of sucking" thing that bothers me.
peter
Just the only sith warrier in history who take virtue to take virtue to
and beyond the obnoxious limit.
Rainbow Heron
wrote:
<snip>
>> >> Ponte pushes a button and a probe flies down to the city. It lands near
>> >> McCluskey's bar, where Chuck Babbage is drinking scotch to drown his
>> >> sorrows of losing the election.
>> >
>> >Uh, Babbage, aka the Jedi Hacker, doesn't drink. And if he did his
>> >synthoid body wouldn't get drunk.
>> >
>> >PAY ATTENTION!
>>
>> Dude, you make Sith Wars suck. I thought I made my Sith War suck, but
>> you make your Sith Wars really suck.
>>
>> -- Kim Le
>
>I think he gets off on the fact that he's the most annoying Sith War
>character in history.
Does that mean that the Jedi Hacker is Annoying Man?
I certainly hope NOT!
-Rainbow Heron
(sig hopes not too cuz sig likes Muuurgh)
Muurgh? <:.-(
==========================================
http://web.infoave.net/~rkanderson/rassm/swc.htm
Rainbow Heron's Sith War Characters Page
==========================================
I'm gonna kick their asses! And then I'm gonna kick their butts!
And when I'm done kicking their donkeys and cigarettes,
I'm gonna kick THEM!
Lefty Skywalker
> On Wed, 11 Sep 2002 15:57:08 -0400, "Corn Flake" <Not...@bolton.com>
> wrote:
>
> <snip>
> >> >> Ponte pushes a button and a probe flies down to the city. It lands near
> >> >> McCluskey's bar, where Chuck Babbage is drinking scotch to drown his
> >> >> sorrows of losing the election.
> >> >
> >> >Uh, Babbage, aka the Jedi Hacker, doesn't drink. And if he did his
> >> >synthoid body wouldn't get drunk.
> >> >
> >> >PAY ATTENTION!
This is the problem with a group story. You should've learned it when
Tilson cut off your character's hands and replaced them with marital aids.
To wit: you've made your character a straight-man, so of course awful
things HAVE to happen to him. If there's something he wouldn't do,
someone will write a story where he is coerced or otherwise induced to do
it.
> >> Dude, you make Sith Wars suck. I thought I made my Sith War suck, but
> >> you make your Sith Wars really suck.
There's a reason I'm not in this one...
> >> -- Kim Le
> >
> >I think he gets off on the fact that he's the most annoying Sith War
> >character in history.
>
> Does that mean that the Jedi Hacker is Annoying Man?
Peter == Craig?
Daniel O. Miller
"Does this look familiar? Do you know what it is? Neither do I! I made
it last night in my sleep. Apparently I used gindrogac - highly unstable!
I put a button on it, yes? I wish to press it, but I'm not sure what will
happen if I do..." - Gune
WWYD?
Rainbow Heron
<dmil...@ridgenet.net> wrote:
>> >I think he gets off on the fact that he's the most annoying Sith War
>> >character in history.
>>
>> Does that mean that the Jedi Hacker is Annoying Man?
>
>Peter == Craig?
I'm kidding Dan'l.
But I'm not kidding when I say nobody try to kill me or the Pokemon
while I'm gone. I leave for upstate New York in the morning (GUMBY!
EMAIL ME QUICK!!! HURRY!!!), be back by Tues or Wed.
-Rainbow Heron
(sig has to stay home tho)
I wonder if I could jump the border for fun while I'm at it. We'll be
close enough. ;-)
==========================================
http://web.infoave.net/~rkanderson/rassm/swc.htm
Rainbow Heron's Sith War Characters Page
==========================================
Jell-o jigglers are like Gak
...except they don't make that fart noise.
Craig Stelle
Lefty Skywalker at dmil...@ridgenet.net wrote on 9/11/02 6:09 PM:
> On Wed, 11 Sep 2002, Rainbow Heron wrote:
>
>> On Wed, 11 Sep 2002 15:57:08 -0400, "Corn Flake" <Not...@bolton.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>> <snip>
>>>>>> Ponte pushes a button and a probe flies down to the city. It lands near
>>>>>> McCluskey's bar, where Chuck Babbage is drinking scotch to drown his
>>>>>> sorrows of losing the election.
>>>>>
>>>>> Uh, Babbage, aka the Jedi Hacker, doesn't drink. And if he did his
>>>>> synthoid body wouldn't get drunk.
>>>>>
>>>>> PAY ATTENTION!
>
> This is the problem with a group story. You should've learned it when
> Tilson cut off your character's hands and replaced them with marital aids.
> To wit: you've made your character a straight-man, so of course awful
> things HAVE to happen to him. If there's something he wouldn't do,
> someone will write a story where he is coerced or otherwise induced to do
> it.
>
>>>> Dude, you make Sith Wars suck. I thought I made my Sith War suck, but
>>>> you make your Sith Wars really suck.
>
> There's a reason I'm not in this one...
>
>>>> -- Kim Le
>>>
>>> I think he gets off on the fact that he's the most annoying Sith War
>>> character in history.
>>
>> Does that mean that the Jedi Hacker is Annoying Man?
>
> Peter == Craig?
*POUNCE*
Wait a tick.
*POUNCE*
*POUNCE*
I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote, actually in
response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated spin-off of
Jedi Hacker's life. Not to be confused with me, tank you.
-Annoying Man
I am Annoying Man! Annoying man! Annoying Man!
Rainbow Heron
<grey...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote, actually in
>response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated spin-off of
>Jedi Hacker's life.
So I was half-right after all.
>Not to be confused with me, tank you.
Oh I know *that*, I was just kidding around cuz I suspected that the
above was true.
>-Annoying Man
>I am Annoying Man! Annoying man! Annoying Man!
Don't I know it! Don't I know it! Don't I know it!
<IT growls from the bathroom>
-Rainbow Heron
(sig likes Muuurgh and sig likes Annoying Man, but sig does not like
Hacker)
Please don't kill me Muuurgh- you wouldn't like it.
Craig Stelle
rainbo...@ftc-i.net wrote on 9/12/02 8:34 AM:
> On Thu, 12 Sep 2002 09:17:31 -0500, Craig Stelle
> <grey...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>> I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote, actually in
>> response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated spin-off of
>> Jedi Hacker's life.
>
> So I was half-right after all.
>
>> Not to be confused with me, tank you.
>
> Oh I know *that*, I was just kidding around cuz I suspected that the
> above was true.
>
>> -Annoying Man
>> I am Annoying Man! Annoying man! Annoying Man!
>
> Don't I know it! Don't I know it! Don't I know it!
>
> <IT growls from the bathroom>
>
> -Rainbow Heron
> (sig likes Muuurgh and sig likes Annoying Man, but sig does not like
> Hacker)
>
> Please don't kill me Muuurgh- you wouldn't like it.
But you have taken Gumby from us. This does not settle well in the belly of
the Porkinites.
*twidles thumbs*
Hmm, by Sith War law I am not allowed to "kill" you. But if you give us
Gumby back then the severity of the reprocussion will lessen *smile*
-Muuurgh
cai...@newsreader.com
> I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote, actually
> in response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated
> spin-off of Jedi Hacker's life.
Dude, you're brilliant. Been a while since I told you that, I know, but
it's true.
Steve Tilson
- affirming other RASSMers since about thirty seconds ago
--
-------------------- http://NewsReader.Com/ --------------------
Usenet Newsgroup Service
Corn Flake
<cai...@NewsReader.Com> wrote in message
news:20020912161759.687$K...@newsreader.com...
> Craig Stelle <grey...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> > I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote,
actually
> > in response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated
> > spin-off of Jedi Hacker's life.
>
> Dude, you're brilliant. Been a while since I told you that, I know, but
> it's true.
>
> Steve Tilson
> - affirming other RASSMers since about thirty seconds ago
Cool, kind of like how Chachi was a younger and much more intense version of
the Fonze?
Jade
--
You are brilliant.
Corn Flake
"Corn Flake" <Not...@bolton.com> wrote in message
news:Sb7g9.7088$e44.4...@news4.srv.hcvlny.cv.net...
Not you, Steve. Muuurgh. You, on the other hand, are pants wettin' handsome.
Jade
--
And you win sometimes.
ObeeKris
straddling a state line:
> *twidles thumbs*
> Hmm, by Sith War law I am not allowed to "kill" you. But if you give us
> Gumby back then the severity of the reprocussion will lessen *smile*
By Sith War law, I'm not allowed to "kill" C'Pi.
But he still had his head handed to him.
(oooooooh, look at the alliteration. :) )
ObeeKris
Muuurgh
<cai...@NewsReader.Com> wrote in message
news:20020912161759.687$K...@newsreader.com...
> > I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote,
actually
> > in response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated
> > spin-off of Jedi Hacker's life.
>
> Dude, you're brilliant. Been a while since I told you that, I know, but
> it's true.
Thank you, thank you. You are much too kind, thank you.
*waives*
No really I've had enough peanuts and jam for one day, thank you.
>
> Steve Tilson
> - affirming other RASSMers since about thirty seconds ago.
Keep it up, it may get you voted for yet.
-Muuurgh
Muuurgh
>
> "Corn Flake" <Not...@bolton.com> wrote in message
> news:Sb7g9.7088$e44.4...@news4.srv.hcvlny.cv.net...
> >
> > <cai...@NewsReader.Com> wrote in message
> > news:20020912161759.687$K...@newsreader.com...
> > > Craig Stelle <grey...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> > > > I created Annoying Man in a response to a post that Peter wrote,
> > actually
> > > > in response to Peter in general. So Annoying Man is an exaggerated
> > > > spin-off of Jedi Hacker's life.
> > >
> > > Dude, you're brilliant. Been a while since I told you that, I know,
but
> > > it's true.
> > >
> > > Steve Tilson
> > > - affirming other RASSMers since about thirty seconds ago
> >
> > Cool, kind of like how Chachi was a younger and much more intense
version
> of
> > the Fonze?
> >
> >
> > Jade
> > --
> > You are brilliant.
>
> Not you, Steve. Muuurgh.
Awe, geez.
*kicks a small stone*
Thanks Jade, I thought the Porkinites were beginning to get pissed at me for
brining She'Pi back into the mix.
-Muuurgh
Rainbow Heron
<grey...@hotmail.com> wrote:
<snip- sorry>
>> -Rainbow Heron
>> (sig likes Muuurgh and sig likes Annoying Man, but sig does not like
>> Hacker)
>>
>> Please don't kill me Muuurgh- you wouldn't like it.
>
>But you have taken Gumby from us.
Correction: Gumby *came* to me- or rather .sig did. We cannot be
seperated from our .sigs and sigs no matter how hard they try.
>This does not settle well in the belly of the Porkinites.
But I've been making you guys trout-flavored beer!
I've got a whole catering service at the ready here!
<PeterPika and Hot ROddish grab their aprons and ask where the kitchen
is>
<'Puffs and Jedichu grab the dishes and start looking for kick-ass
recepies>
>*twidles thumbs*
>Hmm, by Sith War law I am not allowed to "kill" you.
Or the Pokemon.
>But if you give us Gumby back then the severity of the reprocussion
>will lessen *smile*
Gumby *did* come back and we rebuilt your Hall of Ham for you!
-Rainbow Heron
(sig's head is spinning)
Gratitude or at least latitude but please not attitude!