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Stuck in Hull
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Daniel Daly
Mar 26, 2013, 10:06:41 AM3/26/13
to
Chronicles of the
Infinite Realm of Majesty
Stuck in Hull
by
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
Copyright 6177 SC
Melaniel watched the fly climb slowly up the wall. It poked around for a bit and then took off again, and shortly disappeared out the window. She looked out after it and then returned her gaze to the wall. There WERE posters on it,at least. There WAS something to look at. But bugger all else. She sat there,bored. Finally she turned to the one way glass mirror on the opposite wall which she couldn't see through. 'I hope you are enjoying this,' she said out loud. 'It sure bores the fuck out of me,' she said under her breath.'
A voice came over an intercom. 'Remember, Melanie. We're not here. For the exercise you have to think you are alone.'
'Yeh, right. Whatever,' she said.
She looked around the room, and finally noticed the little box under the other lounge seat.
'She's noticed it,' a voice said in the control room.
'Get cameras on her face. We don't want to miss anything,' said the other.
As the hidden ones watched, Melanie B got down on her knees, retrieved the tin box and looked at it. There was a lock on it. A combination lock of 3 digits.
'For fuck's sake,' she said swearing, but starting at 000 she worked through her numbers only to screech 'Bastards' as the number 986 finally undid the lock.
She glared at the one way mirror. Inside David almost smiled.
'She's cute when she's angry,' said Daniel.
David nodded in agreement.
The box open she found the note. 376 x 123,489 - 456,722 =
She glared at the mirror again. She hated maths questions.
But as she worked it out slowly she came to 45,975,142, and typed that into the pad against the locked door. She hit the accept button and, watching nervously, the door bolted open.
'Alleluia,' she said. 'At fucking last.' She walked through and the door quickly closed behind her. In the new room, much the same again, but a toilet in a small cubicle with a shower and soap, and a tiny kitchenette with a fridge. She quickly looked inside. 17 Mars bars, a pint of fresh milk, and one egg and lettuce sandwich. She poured herself a glass of water and sat down eating the sandwich. Then she looked at the bookcase and noted the various items and looked at the small mattress on the floor. There was a light sheet and one pillow. But it was warm enough inside, so she would be fine. And then she looked at the other door and noticed the same electronic lock, and started figuring this was probably how the rest of the challenge would go. And, of course, Daniel and David would be behind the mirror in this room also.
'How many rooms?' she asked the mirror, munching on her sandwich.
'We can't really tell her that,' said Daniel to David.
'But we don't want to piss her off. It doesn't have to be 100% lifelike. Its only research for a videogame in the end. We can give her a break,' said David.
'Fine. Ok,' said Daniel.
David's voice came over the intercom. 'There are12. But we shouldn't have told you that.'
'Right,' said Melanie to herself, and summed up the challenge. 12 rooms, probably all the same size, and an increasing challenge to crack the number code each time. Still, for the sake of 'UK state of mind', someone had to do it.
* * * * *
Room 5. Melanie was stumped. It had taken two days to work out room two, a whole week for room three, and 17 days for room four. She had been in room 5 for a full month and no solution, and her supplies in this room were starting to run low. And the sign on the wall reading 'It's obvious' was really starting to piss her off. She had insulted the mirror more than once because of it.
Finally she caved. She looked into the mirror and asked, 'What is so obvious, then?'
The intercom came on and a voice said, 'That you're stupid.'
She glared at the mirror, but kept her tongue for once.
'That wasn't very nice, Daniel,' said David in the control room.
'She's thick as a brick. This is one of the easier ones.'
'She just hasn't worked it out yet,' said David. He spoke into the intercom. 'It's a lot easier than you think, Mel. Keep this one simple.'
'Easy for you to say,' said Melanie, and hooked into a Mars bar.
She sat on the couch, looking around the room. 'What is so obvious then?' she asked herself. Three bookcases, no clues on any book pages. A desk with their notes. A computer with Microsoft on it but one file which reads 'try again'. And an assortment of knick knacks. But no bloody clues. I mean, why is room number five so obvious?' she asked herself.
A thought suddenly struck her. Obvious about room 5. No it couldn't be that simple.
She stood, walked to the number panel, shrugged, typed in the number 5 and hit the button. And the door jolted open. She smiled, but before she left the room she walked over to the mirror, said, 'bastards,' and went on to the next challenge.
'She's worked it out at last!' exclaimed Daniel.
'See, she's not that stupid,' responded David smiling.
'We'll see,' said Daniel. 'Let's see if she can work out room six.'
'Yes, let's,' said David, as they slid their seats down the control desk to the next room's viewing mirror.
* * * * *
'Room nine and doing fine,' she said to herself. 5 months of crypticity and intense logic and Melanie Janine Mandela Brown was a new woman. But how long she would be stuck in Hull in this conundrum of a maze yet she did not know. Still, she was stronger and harder for the experience so far and would not quit. No way would she ever, now, press the big red 'Escape' button on each room's wall. No way.
'Are you enjoying yourself?' asked a voice over the intercom. 'You don't look like you have bothered with anything yet?'
Melanie ignored the voice and continued watching 'Spiceworld 7' on the DVD player. All 25 were on the rack.
'I'll get to it,' she finally replied.
In the control room, David turned to Daniel. 'You think she really will watch all 25 of them?'
'Instinctive, I'd say. She must know.'
A few days later, putting in the final disc and settling down for the girls ultimate adventure, the disc simply failed to show any screen. She cleaned the disc, but nothing.
'Bastards,' she yelled at the mirror. Daniel and David were used to that. And then she looked more carefully at what she thought was the clock on the top left of the screen, and noticed it was in fact just a number. She read it to herself, typed it into the keypad, pressed the button, and the door yet again jolted open. She went to the mirror, smiled, shook her head and was just about to speak when Daniel's voice came over the intercom, saying, 'Don't say it. We know. Bastards.'
'Exactly,' said Melanie B, and hopped off to room nine.
'She might even make it,' said David.
'Room 12 will get her. She is only a Spice Girl,' said Daniel.
'You really are a bastard, aren't you,' said David.
'Exactly,' responded Daniel, grinning madly.
* * * * *
1 year nearly up, and she didn't have much time left, for that was the maximun duration of the challenge. And as she finally exited room 11 in triumph, she looked at the clock. 2 hours to midnight. The last day.
'You haven't a hope,' said Daniel over the intercom.'
The room was full of thousands of books, and a few other minor items. She took a coke from the new fridge, collapsed on the bed and gazed at the room. It had been a valiant effort, but she couldn't possibly hope to win now. They had bested her. She laid there, almost sobbing. All that work. All that struggle. To fall just short, after all that effort. Life really was ironic. Thanks Alanis Morrisette. She looked up at the ceiling, cried out 'give me a break,' and turned over sobbing.
Nearly two hours later she was quiet. Humbled. She had come so far, only to fall just short. How bloody ironic. She looked at the clock. 10 minutes to go. She would have to put on a brave face.
She sat up, looked around the room one last time, and then gave up, sitting their glumly. What else could she do.
And then, a quiet little voice, whispered into the back of her mind, 'Try the scroll.' Another voice responded to the first one, though, and said, 'Don't bloody tell her, ok. Cheat.'
Reluctantly Melanie got to her feet, retrieved the one and only scroll from the bookcase, and unrolling it read, 'Beginning of beginnings, the start of an endless journey. The answer you seek is on the first day you were born.'
Melanie cogitated.
'Try your birthdate, dimwit,' a voice said over the intercom.
She got up quickly, punched in her birthdate and started hearing the chimes from the grandfather clock start chiming to 12.
'Shit,' she said, as she had entered the wrong date.
'Come on Melanie. You can do this,' she said, calming herself down. And as she correctly entered her birthdate and hit the button, the door jolted open and she burst through just before the 12th chime.
All of a sudden a huge bang and rushing into the room came Geri, Melanie C, Victoria and Emma and many other familiar faces, all crashing into her, clapping her and patting her on the back. And 'Wannabe' started playing, and party food was brought out.
And, finally, Daniel and David appeared, and David smiled at her, 'Brilliant, Melanie Brown,' he said, and she hugged him. But Daniel looked at her and said, 'You just got lucky, kid.'
Melanie stared at her adversary, took David by the arm and flirted back to Daniel, saying, 'Unlike YOU tonight, KID!'
And she laughed madly, escaping away with her night's lover, leaving a mad Daniel grinning and shaking his head, saying, 'Bastard.'
And then Geri grabbed him, gave him a kiss, and said 'Come on lover. I'll give you a break,' and the following year UK State of Mind was a smash hit all summer long.
The End
http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
Infinite Realm of Majesty
Stuck in Hull
by
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
Copyright 6177 SC
Melaniel watched the fly climb slowly up the wall. It poked around for a bit and then took off again, and shortly disappeared out the window. She looked out after it and then returned her gaze to the wall. There WERE posters on it,at least. There WAS something to look at. But bugger all else. She sat there,bored. Finally she turned to the one way glass mirror on the opposite wall which she couldn't see through. 'I hope you are enjoying this,' she said out loud. 'It sure bores the fuck out of me,' she said under her breath.'
A voice came over an intercom. 'Remember, Melanie. We're not here. For the exercise you have to think you are alone.'
'Yeh, right. Whatever,' she said.
She looked around the room, and finally noticed the little box under the other lounge seat.
'She's noticed it,' a voice said in the control room.
'Get cameras on her face. We don't want to miss anything,' said the other.
As the hidden ones watched, Melanie B got down on her knees, retrieved the tin box and looked at it. There was a lock on it. A combination lock of 3 digits.
'For fuck's sake,' she said swearing, but starting at 000 she worked through her numbers only to screech 'Bastards' as the number 986 finally undid the lock.
She glared at the one way mirror. Inside David almost smiled.
'She's cute when she's angry,' said Daniel.
David nodded in agreement.
The box open she found the note. 376 x 123,489 - 456,722 =
She glared at the mirror again. She hated maths questions.
But as she worked it out slowly she came to 45,975,142, and typed that into the pad against the locked door. She hit the accept button and, watching nervously, the door bolted open.
'Alleluia,' she said. 'At fucking last.' She walked through and the door quickly closed behind her. In the new room, much the same again, but a toilet in a small cubicle with a shower and soap, and a tiny kitchenette with a fridge. She quickly looked inside. 17 Mars bars, a pint of fresh milk, and one egg and lettuce sandwich. She poured herself a glass of water and sat down eating the sandwich. Then she looked at the bookcase and noted the various items and looked at the small mattress on the floor. There was a light sheet and one pillow. But it was warm enough inside, so she would be fine. And then she looked at the other door and noticed the same electronic lock, and started figuring this was probably how the rest of the challenge would go. And, of course, Daniel and David would be behind the mirror in this room also.
'How many rooms?' she asked the mirror, munching on her sandwich.
'We can't really tell her that,' said Daniel to David.
'But we don't want to piss her off. It doesn't have to be 100% lifelike. Its only research for a videogame in the end. We can give her a break,' said David.
'Fine. Ok,' said Daniel.
David's voice came over the intercom. 'There are12. But we shouldn't have told you that.'
'Right,' said Melanie to herself, and summed up the challenge. 12 rooms, probably all the same size, and an increasing challenge to crack the number code each time. Still, for the sake of 'UK state of mind', someone had to do it.
* * * * *
Room 5. Melanie was stumped. It had taken two days to work out room two, a whole week for room three, and 17 days for room four. She had been in room 5 for a full month and no solution, and her supplies in this room were starting to run low. And the sign on the wall reading 'It's obvious' was really starting to piss her off. She had insulted the mirror more than once because of it.
Finally she caved. She looked into the mirror and asked, 'What is so obvious, then?'
The intercom came on and a voice said, 'That you're stupid.'
She glared at the mirror, but kept her tongue for once.
'That wasn't very nice, Daniel,' said David in the control room.
'She's thick as a brick. This is one of the easier ones.'
'She just hasn't worked it out yet,' said David. He spoke into the intercom. 'It's a lot easier than you think, Mel. Keep this one simple.'
'Easy for you to say,' said Melanie, and hooked into a Mars bar.
She sat on the couch, looking around the room. 'What is so obvious then?' she asked herself. Three bookcases, no clues on any book pages. A desk with their notes. A computer with Microsoft on it but one file which reads 'try again'. And an assortment of knick knacks. But no bloody clues. I mean, why is room number five so obvious?' she asked herself.
A thought suddenly struck her. Obvious about room 5. No it couldn't be that simple.
She stood, walked to the number panel, shrugged, typed in the number 5 and hit the button. And the door jolted open. She smiled, but before she left the room she walked over to the mirror, said, 'bastards,' and went on to the next challenge.
'She's worked it out at last!' exclaimed Daniel.
'See, she's not that stupid,' responded David smiling.
'We'll see,' said Daniel. 'Let's see if she can work out room six.'
'Yes, let's,' said David, as they slid their seats down the control desk to the next room's viewing mirror.
* * * * *
'Room nine and doing fine,' she said to herself. 5 months of crypticity and intense logic and Melanie Janine Mandela Brown was a new woman. But how long she would be stuck in Hull in this conundrum of a maze yet she did not know. Still, she was stronger and harder for the experience so far and would not quit. No way would she ever, now, press the big red 'Escape' button on each room's wall. No way.
'Are you enjoying yourself?' asked a voice over the intercom. 'You don't look like you have bothered with anything yet?'
Melanie ignored the voice and continued watching 'Spiceworld 7' on the DVD player. All 25 were on the rack.
'I'll get to it,' she finally replied.
In the control room, David turned to Daniel. 'You think she really will watch all 25 of them?'
'Instinctive, I'd say. She must know.'
A few days later, putting in the final disc and settling down for the girls ultimate adventure, the disc simply failed to show any screen. She cleaned the disc, but nothing.
'Bastards,' she yelled at the mirror. Daniel and David were used to that. And then she looked more carefully at what she thought was the clock on the top left of the screen, and noticed it was in fact just a number. She read it to herself, typed it into the keypad, pressed the button, and the door yet again jolted open. She went to the mirror, smiled, shook her head and was just about to speak when Daniel's voice came over the intercom, saying, 'Don't say it. We know. Bastards.'
'Exactly,' said Melanie B, and hopped off to room nine.
'She might even make it,' said David.
'Room 12 will get her. She is only a Spice Girl,' said Daniel.
'You really are a bastard, aren't you,' said David.
'Exactly,' responded Daniel, grinning madly.
* * * * *
1 year nearly up, and she didn't have much time left, for that was the maximun duration of the challenge. And as she finally exited room 11 in triumph, she looked at the clock. 2 hours to midnight. The last day.
'You haven't a hope,' said Daniel over the intercom.'
The room was full of thousands of books, and a few other minor items. She took a coke from the new fridge, collapsed on the bed and gazed at the room. It had been a valiant effort, but she couldn't possibly hope to win now. They had bested her. She laid there, almost sobbing. All that work. All that struggle. To fall just short, after all that effort. Life really was ironic. Thanks Alanis Morrisette. She looked up at the ceiling, cried out 'give me a break,' and turned over sobbing.
Nearly two hours later she was quiet. Humbled. She had come so far, only to fall just short. How bloody ironic. She looked at the clock. 10 minutes to go. She would have to put on a brave face.
She sat up, looked around the room one last time, and then gave up, sitting their glumly. What else could she do.
And then, a quiet little voice, whispered into the back of her mind, 'Try the scroll.' Another voice responded to the first one, though, and said, 'Don't bloody tell her, ok. Cheat.'
Reluctantly Melanie got to her feet, retrieved the one and only scroll from the bookcase, and unrolling it read, 'Beginning of beginnings, the start of an endless journey. The answer you seek is on the first day you were born.'
Melanie cogitated.
'Try your birthdate, dimwit,' a voice said over the intercom.
She got up quickly, punched in her birthdate and started hearing the chimes from the grandfather clock start chiming to 12.
'Shit,' she said, as she had entered the wrong date.
'Come on Melanie. You can do this,' she said, calming herself down. And as she correctly entered her birthdate and hit the button, the door jolted open and she burst through just before the 12th chime.
All of a sudden a huge bang and rushing into the room came Geri, Melanie C, Victoria and Emma and many other familiar faces, all crashing into her, clapping her and patting her on the back. And 'Wannabe' started playing, and party food was brought out.
And, finally, Daniel and David appeared, and David smiled at her, 'Brilliant, Melanie Brown,' he said, and she hugged him. But Daniel looked at her and said, 'You just got lucky, kid.'
Melanie stared at her adversary, took David by the arm and flirted back to Daniel, saying, 'Unlike YOU tonight, KID!'
And she laughed madly, escaping away with her night's lover, leaving a mad Daniel grinning and shaking his head, saying, 'Bastard.'
And then Geri grabbed him, gave him a kiss, and said 'Come on lover. I'll give you a break,' and the following year UK State of Mind was a smash hit all summer long.
The End
http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
THE COLONEL
Mar 26, 2013, 10:28:42 AM3/26/13
to
You don't think anyone reads all that crap?
LOL
LOL
Daniel Daly
May 16, 2013, 3:49:19 AM5/16/13
to
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
May 16, 2013, 6:11:27 AM5/16/13
to
Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
> http://spammingcuntbooks.angelfire.com
>
> Noahide Books
Do you have any in Naugahide?
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
> http://spammingcuntbooks.angelfire.com
>
> Noahide Books
Do you have any in Naugahide?
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
May 20, 2013, 3:48:41 AM5/20/13
to
Huge <Hu...@nowhere.much.invalid> wrote:
> On 2013-05-16, Steve Firth <%steve%@malloc.co.uk> wrote:
> > Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
> >> http://spammingcuntbooks.angelfire.com
> >>
> >> Noahide Books
> >
> > Do you have any in Naugahide?
>
> Didn't you know that Naugas are a protected species now?
Probably due to over-hunting as a result of the demand for hides from
the American soft furnishing industry.
--
Burn Hollywood burn, burn down to the ground
> On 2013-05-16, Steve Firth <%steve%@malloc.co.uk> wrote:
> > Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
> >> http://spammingcuntbooks.angelfire.com
> >>
> >> Noahide Books
> >
> > Do you have any in Naugahide?
>
Probably due to over-hunting as a result of the demand for hides from
the American soft furnishing industry.
--
Burn Hollywood burn, burn down to the ground
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
May 20, 2013, 5:48:23 AM5/20/13
to
Huge <Hu...@nowhere.much.invalid> wrote:
> industry, following the discovery it is easier to farm Alcantars than
> Naugas.
Meanwhile what is left of the British car manufacturing sector is in
difficulty because of the extinction of the Connolly, noted for its fine
hide. The last captive specimen died in 2002 at the age of 124.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
> On 2013-05-20, Steve Firth <%steve%@malloc.co.uk> wrote:
>> Huge <Hu...@nowhere.much.invalid> wrote:
>>
>>> On 2013-05-16, Steve Firth <%steve%@malloc.co.uk> wrote:
>>>> Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
>>>>> http://spammingcuntbooks.angelfire.com
>>>>>
>>>>> Noahide Books
>>>>
>>>> Do you have any in Naugahide?
>>>
>>> Didn't you know that Naugas are a protected species now?
>>
>> Probably due to over-hunting as a result of the demand for hides from
>> the American soft furnishing industry.
>
> Precisely. Even given the down-turn in consumption by the automotive
>> Huge <Hu...@nowhere.much.invalid> wrote:
>>
>>> On 2013-05-16, Steve Firth <%steve%@malloc.co.uk> wrote:
>>>> Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
>>>>> http://spammingcuntbooks.angelfire.com
>>>>>
>>>>> Noahide Books
>>>>
>>>> Do you have any in Naugahide?
>>>
>>> Didn't you know that Naugas are a protected species now?
>>
>> Probably due to over-hunting as a result of the demand for hides from
>> the American soft furnishing industry.
>
> industry, following the discovery it is easier to farm Alcantars than
> Naugas.
Meanwhile what is left of the British car manufacturing sector is in
difficulty because of the extinction of the Connolly, noted for its fine
hide. The last captive specimen died in 2002 at the age of 124.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
May 20, 2013, 9:28:46 AM5/20/13
to
The shops on the North Circular near Hanger Lane must take their share of
the blame.
World of Leather
Land of Leather
Kingdom of Leather
Empire of Leather
Planet of Leather
It's a war of escalation that will soon consume all known (and unknown)
leather in the Universe.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Daniel Daly
May 31, 2013, 8:14:39 PM5/31/13
to
Message has been deleted
Daniel Daly
Jun 1, 2013, 8:32:13 AM6/1/13
to
Get stuffed. I have as much right to post to this group as anyone. I was born in Kingston upon Hull in the UK in 1972, and the story is set in Hull, and this is a UK group, so get stuffed. I will bloody well post it if I bloody well want to.
http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
Jun 1, 2013, 6:22:56 PM6/1/13
to
Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
> Get stuffed. I have as much right to post to this group as anyone. I
> was born in Kingston upon Hull in the UK in 1972, and the story is set in
> Hull, and this is a UK group, so get stuffed. I will bloody well post it
> if I bloody well want to.
>
> http://scammingcunt.angelfire.com
> Get stuffed. I have as much right to post to this group as anyone. I
> was born in Kingston upon Hull in the UK in 1972, and the story is set in
> Hull, and this is a UK group, so get stuffed. I will bloody well post it
> if I bloody well want to.
>
Fuck off you spamming arsehole. You don't have any right to spam anywhere
on usenet. Not even if you were born in Buckingham Palace with a silver
spoon up your arse.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Daniel Daly
Jun 2, 2013, 10:35:18 AM6/2/13
to
A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude. They use gutter language which defines their class of character.
Marcus Houlden
Jun 2, 2013, 10:49:11 AM6/2/13
to
On Sun, 2 Jun 2013 07:35:18 -0700 (PDT), Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au>
wrote the following to uk.misc:
> A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude. They use gutter language which defines their class of character.
Gutter language? Is that the sort that drains you until the backwash falls
out of your manhole? Maybe it should be kerbed and ditched immediately, but
some people do get a bit entrenched.
mh.
--
http://www.nukesoft.co.uk
http://www.houlden.org
wrote the following to uk.misc:
> A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude. They use gutter language which defines their class of character.
out of your manhole? Maybe it should be kerbed and ditched immediately, but
some people do get a bit entrenched.
mh.
--
http://www.nukesoft.co.uk
http://www.houlden.org
Message has been deleted
Brian Howie
Jun 2, 2013, 11:37:50 AM6/2/13
to
In message <phomq8tov4cvprgnp...@4ax.com>, Marc Wilson
<E-0C0013...@cleopatra.co.uk> writes
>In uk.misc, (Huge) wrote in <b10u87...@mid.individual.net>::
>
>And Kingston upon Hull is only in the UK because efforts to push it into
>the North Sea and scuttle it have failed so far.
This is maybe the latest attempt to erase it
Http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-humber-22625513
With Virginia Bottomley as Sheriff.
B
--
Brian Howie
<E-0C0013...@cleopatra.co.uk> writes
>In uk.misc, (Huge) wrote in <b10u87...@mid.individual.net>::
>
>>On 2013-06-01, Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
>>> Get stuffed. I have as much right to post to this group as anyone.
>>On 2013-06-01, Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
>>> Get stuffed. I have as much right to post to this group as anyone.
>>>was born in Kingston upon Hull in the UK in 1972, and the story is
>>>set in Hull, and this is a UK group, so get stuffed. I will bloody
>>>well post it if I bloody well want to.
>>>
>>> http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
>>
>>And get killfiled everywhere ...
>>>set in Hull, and this is a UK group, so get stuffed. I will bloody
>>>well post it if I bloody well want to.
>>>
>>> http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
>>
>
>And Kingston upon Hull is only in the UK because efforts to push it into
>the North Sea and scuttle it have failed so far.
This is maybe the latest attempt to erase it
Http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-humber-22625513
With Virginia Bottomley as Sheriff.
B
--
Brian Howie
Message has been deleted
Richard Robinson
Jun 2, 2013, 1:26:15 PM6/2/13
to
> http://noahidebooks.angelbollocks.com
Noahide's a rarity, Noahs are extinct.
--
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem
My email address is at http://www.qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html
Noahide's a rarity, Noahs are extinct.
--
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem
My email address is at http://www.qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
Jun 2, 2013, 7:26:28 PM6/2/13
to
Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
> A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude. They
> use gutter language which defines their class of character.
One person is an arrogant brainless twat. But he can feel free to stop
> A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude. They
> use gutter language which defines their class of character.
spamming or fuck right off.
BTW the swearing class is the upper class, cuntface.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Fevric J. Glandules
Jun 3, 2013, 9:31:03 AM6/3/13
to
Daniel Daly wrote:
> A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude.
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> A number of the people in this group are very arrogant and rude.
If you don't like it, you can fuck off.
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Daniel Daly
Jun 3, 2013, 7:26:11 PM6/3/13
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Scientists have done studies. The greater the level of expletive employed, and the more vehement the tone, indicators are set for that individual to be amongst the more barbaric, primitive and unintelligent of any given society. This group seems to be replete with said individuals.
Daniel Daly
Jun 3, 2013, 7:32:49 PM6/3/13
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The Infinite Realm of Majesty
By
Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
Stories:
The Equinox Paradigm Series: Stories 1 to 10
Melaniel the Magnificent Child of Majesty
Angel
The Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing but the Truth
X Factor
Actually, Love
U.K. State of Mind
Stuck in Hull
Confused
Bedding David Rothchild
Life with David
When it's Over
The Equinox Paradigm
Chapter One
Suddenly alive. 487 years stuck in limbo, Karnos, a deity of extreme perseverance to accomplish his sadistic objectives, had spent 487 years in limbo, banished there by Jaltar, a deity of Law and Order, serving the Universal Spirit of Justice. Karnos was pissed off, very fucking pissed off, and swore traditional vengeance on Jaltar. Jaltar knew it was coming, though, and had arranged for Karnos new human form to be limited to just that – humanity. And sitting there, in the darkness, he was suddenly alive, on a mountain overlooking a city, something which felt like Australia, in human form, and suddenly very thirsty. Karnos had staggered down the mountain, come to a river, and had drunk deeply, refreshing his soul and new body. And then he had lifted his hand to the skies and sworn vengeance upon Jaltar, and destruction of his assembly, the Jaltarians.
He swam the river, came to a road, and gradually followed it up, coming to the city limits. He was naked, and as he came to a main road he was honked by numerous cards. He could eat plants, he knew that, but he wanted finer foods, and would need an income. He knew English, the tongue of Australia, so made his way gradually up a road, coming to an interesting looking building. It looked like a bus terminal. He entered, coming up to a receptionist, who looked embarrassed.
‘Shouldn’t you be wearing clothes,’ she said.
‘I don’t have any,’ replied Karnos. ‘Is there a welfare centre nearby?’
‘Oh, I see. Well, Centrelink is just around the corner. Look, I will take you there. You probably need help by the looks of it.’
‘Thanks,’ said Karnos.
5 minutes later, exiting the vehicle, the woman having given him a skivvy and some pants, they came into the Centrelink office. The lady had told him they were in Tuggeranong in Canberra, and the current year was 2562 CE. He had inquired into his religion and found that Tuggeranong had a Karnosian assembly in the suburb of Macarthur. She had attended once, also attending a number of new deity assemblies, as was her habit. He had also inquired about Jaltarism and found they had an assembly in the district of Belconnen. ‘Good’, he said to himself. It was always useful to know were your enemy was hiding.
The lady who helped him told him her name was ‘Rebecca Lyant’ and that should he ever need help she was available. He eyed her suspiciously, expecting perhaps a potential enemy, but thanked her thinking she was likely innocent and unsuspecting.
He gave the centre a standard ‘I have lost my memory’ explanation, and despite them putting his face through a face scanner to try and identify him, they had no luck, so granted him a new ID which he chose himself and put him on the standard living allowance, and granted him a Government Unit in the centre of Greenway. ‘Perfect’ he thought to himself. He would strike his enemy from there.
That afternoon he was taken to his unit, which already had furniture, and was further taken by one of the Centrelink managers, following protocols, to the main Hyperdome complex to be given various clothing items, shoes and all the necessities for life. The manager showed him were all the shops were, gave him a debit card for his shopping needs, and explained that if he ran out of food the St Vincent de Paul Centre would always help him out. ‘We are here to help, Marcus,’ said the manager to Karnos in the new name he had chosen for himself. ‘We are a thriving community now and Tuggeranong has reached 2 million souls just recently. You can have a great and prosperous life here, and we are a very caring community. I do hope you find what you are looking for. ‘Yeh, well thanks’, responded Marcus, finding it quite nice to have a kind word spoken, unlike the usual torments he had faced in his gladiatorial deity wars.
Sitting in his apartment, looking out the window, there was a knock on the door. He opened it and ‘Rebecca’ stood there, holding a square box. ‘Can I come in, Marcus?’
‘Uh, sure. What’s in the box?’
‘Pizza. You’ll love it. Arnold’s is ancient, and they make simply divine pizza’s. Oh, and I brought a bottle of Coca Cola. I love the stuff.’
He looked at the coke and swore to himself. Nearly 500 years and they were still making Coca Cola – some things never change.
She put on a DVD she had brought, a music one of ‘Britney Spears’, who was still living after over 500 years, so healthy had the diets of society become and so lengthy the new life expectancies. He was surprised at that, but not too surprised. Perhaps he also had a long life here now as well.
After the songs had played for an hour or so, and they had finished there pizza, she looked at him. ‘Do you want to fuck, then? I am randy and you are cute.’
‘Sure,’ he said. They went into the bedroom and she took off her clothes and got onto the bed on all fours. ‘Do me like a beast, Marcus. Give it to me you bad boy.’
He stripped off, his manhood standing at attention, and proceeded to fuck her brains out. It was totally exhilarating.
Having a cigarette after the action, she asked him a question. ‘So what is the plan, dude? What are your goals.’
‘I have an enemy who vanquished me. He must pay.’
‘Oh, so you do know who you are.’
‘Uh, oh. Yeh. But I don’t have a name here and I had no finances or anything. I’m not ripping you off.’
‘Ok. I’ll take you at your word. Well, do you want to fuck me a lot. I will stay with you if you do. I like to fuck men, and you’re hot. What do you say?’
‘Fuck. Okay. Sounds good.’
‘I’ll go and get my stuff. Be back in an hour or so.’
‘Seeya.’ He watched her go, realized he was hitched already, but didn’t mind. She was cute and would do as a girlfriend, but vengeance was on his mind.
* * * * *
Sex every night for 7 straight weeks and Marcus had forgotten his grudge. Instead he was learning about traditional Paganism and the ‘Equinox Paradigm’. The religion Rebecca followed. And it was the ‘Equinox Paradigm’ which was to transform the life of a previously decadent of heart deity of the universe.
Chapter Two
The preacher continued. ‘For it is in ‘BALANCE’ that we find harmony. It is the completion of humanity, the centrepoint, the fundamental axis and axiom of our lives. For the extremes of the solstices bring us to the passions of life, the heat and the cold, but in the balance of the centrepoint, in the balance of the middle, in the Equinox Paradigm, we find perfection of our hearts, minds and soul.’ Marcus looked at the reaction to these words on Rebecca’s face, and it summed it all up. She was totally hooked.
Four hours later she was fucking him harder then ever, and then went down on him and swallowed all his creamy load. Fuck, she was randy, he thought to himself. If this was the ‘Equinox Paradigm’ let it keep on coming.
* * * * *
It was when the Jaltarian entered the assembly that Marcus felt stirred. This kid, whoever he was, was his enemy. He knew it instantly. The kid had a look about him, a spirit, which suggested condemnation of the ‘Equinoxian’s’. And Marcus would not abide that.
He came up to the kid, inquired into his name, found out that it was ‘Joel’, and suggested to him that this place probably wasn’t for him. Joel gave him a funny look and left, something which said it all. But Marcus didn’t care – he knew a troublemaker when he saw one, and four days later when Joel returned to give the assembly members a ‘Jaltarian’ flyer, Marcus knew what it had all been about. But he was over it, now. He’d forgiven his enemy in his heart, as the way of the Equinox taught him to do so, and let go of his grudge. Joel was simply young. Young and naive, not understanding the fuller realities of life. He could speak to him, share his newly acquired wisdom but, in the end, thought better of it. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, a quiet voice whispered to his mind, and that was the end of the issue.
Chapter Three
Marcus had 17 children with Rebecca before she left off bearing. But they stayed together anyway and ended up in the Lanyon valley. The ‘Equinox Paradigm’ became central to his way of life, and every day he studied the nature based texts to learn more and more of how to be perfectly natural. It summed up his whole life and, late one night, his wife giving him an awesome blow job, he thanked the universal spirit that things, in the end, had turned out for the best.
The End
“Vengeance of the Angel Gabralax”
(Story Two in the Equinox Paradigm Series)
Chapter One
Gabralax sensed, in the open and often hostilities amongst the superior deities of the heavenlies, that the Universal Spirit would allow him the grace of escaping the vengeance of Jaltar. For the Angel Gabralax had crippled Jaltar, sending him the wards of healing, were he had sworn traditional vengeance upon Gabralax. And so Gabralax, realizing that he’d always had the human option available to him, as all angelicdom were to taste human flesh at some point in their eternal existence, sought the Universal Spirit who allowed its son to manifest.
Waking up on a slope, overlooking a city, Gabralax wondered to himself where the Spirit had sent him. He was naked, and it was quite cold on his human flesh, so climbing down the slope towards the city he came to a river. With no apparent bridge in sight, he dived in and, shivering, walked along the road he had found coming into the city proper. Cars whizzed past and many honked at the naked man, but none yet stopped. He continued up a road, eventually coming to what looked like a bus depot. Noting it said ‘Tuggeranong Bus Depot’ he suddenly realized he was in Australia, and Canberra from memory. Good, he liked Australians. They were friendly, adaptable with a suitable sense of humour and an appropriate level of carnality for some of the practices he occasionally slipped into.
He came to a lady at the reception area with a badge reading ‘Rebecca Lyant’. She looked at him, laughed to herself, and said, ‘Here we go again. I hope you don’t expect me to fuck you straight away as well?’
Gabralax looked at her perplexed, yet said nothing. She took him to the Centrelink centre, and with the allowance they arranged for him he soon found himself in a unit opposite the hyperdome, with food, clothing and various other items. ‘We care, a lot, you know,’ were the words of the Centrelink officer who looked after him. ‘Tuggeranong is a booming metropolis of over 2,000,000 souls, and we do our best to look after each other. People can make quite a life for themselves in our district, and we work hard to maintain our strong reputation. You can make a real future for yourself here Gabriel,’ which was the name Gabralax had called himself in English.
When the officer had left, he stared out the window, thinking, ‘What next? What next in the life of the Angel Gabriel?’
Chapter Two
Gabriel soon joined the ‘Equinox Paradigm’. It was a place of spiritual teaching which resonated with him in his human form, and ‘Rebecca’ was great company. She lived with a familiar soul, which Gabralax couldn’t quite place.
Soon, though, he met the head of the Equinox Paradigm in Canberra. She was an aboriginal lady, Kooldah Smith, and she was something special to Gabriel. She was earthy, linked in some way to the ancient dreamtime spirits, and represented to Gabriel primal powers from the dawn of creation. He was instantly attracted, and they dated for several months.
She spoke to him of the Equinox Paradigm, of finding balance and harmony with nature and self. Of finding peace and unity in the central times of life, and the power and importance of Mid-Day and Mid-Night. ’12 is the completion of our clock, for a reason Gabriel. It is at these times of the day and night when we are the most alive, the cycles of time having completed many purposes over the previous 12 hours. Of course, in Judaism the cycle of Evening and Morning as the first day is completely important as well for they mark the divisions of dark and light and dawn and dusk are the quarter points, as we call them. Darkness precedes light, and we must rest before we begin our work. We must prepare, and at the time of the day’s equinoxes, midnight and midday, our rest must be the most complete and our work must be the most intense.’
Kooldah taught him much of the Equinox Paradigm, and they mated constantly. When she declared herself pregnant Gabriel was overjoyed, and at the day of the wedding, when all seemed well, Gabriel felt all the problems of life were gone from him. And that is when Jaltar struck.
Chapter Three
She laid dead, on the altar, her blood dripping from the cut to the throat. And the frightened guests all talked of a dark figure, with a scar down his left cheek, dressed in black robes, with long dark hair. And instantly Gabralax knew Jaltar had found his vengeance.
For days he was in a haze, his heart shattered, and then, coming to the river, lifting his hand he swore vengeance, and the Universal Spirit returned him to the heavenlies.
Gladiatorial combat between an Angel and a dark god such as Jaltar was truly something special, yet Gabralax would not allow his victim to live. And when the blade struck deep, severing most of Jaltar’s throat, Gabralax raised his sword and cut off the head completely. And then, his Vengeance complete, he collapsed to the ground and wept.
It was later that year, a little sprite wondered in to his sleeping room, and said to the dreaming Gabralax, ‘In Hades you will find your beloved. But beware, Jaltar’s dark might surrounds her, and her rescue will be difficult. But be brave, angel of God, and your beloved will be restored to you.’
And, upon waking, and remembering the words, Gabralax swore he would rescue his maiden, and knowing the portal to Hades, an impossible place of madness and chaos, he swore he would rescue her. For she was his love and he would not rest until she was restored to him. That much he truly, indeed, did swear.
The End
“The Final Paradigm”
(Story Three in the Equinox Paradigm Series)
Chapter One
Gabralax and Michalax inched their way forwards through a tunnel in the Insanity Abyss, near the bottom of Sheol. Raphalax and Urilax were behind them a few hundred meters, monitoring their escape route. They had fought and dispatched so many of Jaltar’s crony demonites, sending them off down to lower regions of Sheol, were the dead of the dead always progressed to, and now they were about at their destination – the central nub of the Insanity Abyss.
They came to the end of the tunnel and, on the other side of a bluey hazy mist Gabralax spied his beloved Kooldah, lying on a stone altar, seemingly unconscious. Gabralax was about to rush through the mist when Michalax grabbed him. ‘Wait. I fear this mist in front of us is the stuff of pure insanity. If you go through your mind will turn mad – it will turn insane.’
‘But what is my choice, Michalax?’ responded Gabralax. ‘I can not leave my beloved there.’
Just then Jaltar came into view and stood on the other side of the mist, mocking at them. ‘Come, come Gabralax. Take your vengeance,’ and he laughed with a mad laugh, full of pure evil. Gabralax made as to go forwards, but Michael grabbed him and held him back. ‘Wait. Let us go back and find another way in, for it is likely there is more than one. See that opening at the top of the cave?’ Gabralax nodded. ‘Let us try to find that one.’
‘Very well Michalax. But if there is no other way I will dare the mist.’
‘Very well.’
Chapter Two
They retraced their steps, found Raphalax and Urilax and, again fighting through dozens of demonites, gradually found there way to the opening above the nub. But, again, the mist was there.
‘It will surround the entire nub,’ moaned Gabralax. ‘Tis why it is called the Insanity Abyss.’
Michalax nodded. ‘Then we go as one, Gabralax. We go as one.’
‘All for one and one for all,’ said Urilax.
‘Time for action,’ said Raphalax.
And, following Gabralax, they dropped down, floating on their wings, coming through the blue mist, down into the nub of the abyss.
Gabralax’s mind reeled instantly. Visions entered his head, visions of darkness and hatred, all of the purest evil. And, slowly, his mind could not cope with such evil, slowly turning to insanity. He saw Jaltar in front of him, armed with a spear, menacingly approaching him. But while he tried to ready himself, as the others did, he could only clutch his head and scream obscenities at the evil in his mind.
And then, suddenly, a little angel appeared in front of him and asked him this simple question. ‘Gabralax, in the end, what really could possibly be the final paradigm of it all?’
And Gabralax, in response, yelled to Kooldah that he loved her.
Kooldah, seeming to sense the presence of her beloved, awoke. She seemed stunned but, looking around, saw her beloved screaming and being approached by Jaltar with a spear. And then, knowing she must defend her love, rushed to the side of the cave, grabbed a spear, and plunged it into the unsuspecting back of Jaltar. As he collapsed to the ground, screaming in agony, his soul departing for lower regions of Sheol, the blue mist gradually dispersed, and the minds of the angels cleared up.
Gabralax rushed into Kooldah’s arms, kissed her wildly, and the lost love of his heart was restored to him. The final paradigm, it seemed, had saved him in the end.
Chapter Three
The wedding of eternity was attending by thousands, and in the years ahead, as Kooldah bore Gabralax child after child, Gabralax ensure he taught all of them true religion as he saw it. For the Final Paradigm was the hallmark of his life then, and he never, ever forget the power of love. For it was the power of love which had saved him from madness and death, and he would never forget its wonderful, saving grace.
The End
Paradigms Upon Paradigms
(Story Four in the Equinox Paradigm Series)
‘Sex. Sex sounds good Gabby.’
Gabralax looked over at Kooldah, and honestly he was in fact randy enough. Time for some foreplay.
Later on Kooldah was discussing the potential for launching ‘The Equinox Paradigm’ in heaven, but all that Gabralax would say was ‘Good luck’. But she decided to try anyway.
Four days later she was inundated. She had no real idea of the population statistics for the heavenlies, but her husband Gabralax assured her the numbers were mind boggling. All she had done was gone on a message board, announced her name and her being the husband of Gabralax, and checking her email later on that day that she had posted on the message board there were approximately 47 million requests in her inbox, having used the filter, to join the Equinox Paradigm. All Kooldah would say was ‘Fucking Hell.’
‘You probably shouldn’t have mentioned you were married to me. That is, unless, you wanted to be popular. I am kind of well known, Kooly.’
‘I kind of get the point.’
It was then that the debates began. Within a few hours there were numerous people at the front door, Kooldah having mistakenly given out her address, and as fate would have it such angels were the primary pastors by and large of ‘Equinox’. They were looking for something different, something new, something not done previously. And they were happy to commit, so they told her.
But they had endless viewpoints of interpretation about balance and the heart of the Equinox. In fact, Paradigms upon Paradigms of viewpoints. Kooldah soon found her letterbox full of sample essays and statements on how the Equinox could potentially be approached, the significance of the viewpoints and how to make it last forever, amongst a whole spiel of other exciting paradigms.
Gabralax laughed, already planning a move to a new secret location, realizing he would never again have peace at their current address. But for Kooldah it was bliss, all the attention, and he decided to delay things for a while to allow his beloved her time in the sun.
The first divine heavenly council of the Equinox Paradigm got under way within one year of the first message board announcement, and freedom of sexual activity and finding the balance between too much sex and too little sex was the fundamental discussion point of the council.
Kooldah had organised the hierarchy of the fellowship as best she could in such little time, and the debates got under way.
Later on in the year, her fellowship growing in large numbers every day, and in numbers which Gabralax assured her with the ever increasing expansion of the heavenlies that would never end, Kooldah realized to herself, after her many question on earth, that life did have a plan to it. There was this Universal Spiritual Force which Gabralax her husband talked about. A force which gave birth to the dreams of the heart, and gave you untold blessings for your passionate inspirations. And Kooldah, not knowing what else to call this force, fell on her knees one evening in prayer, cried out ‘Thank you God’, and felt the best she had done in all her days of existence.
The Equinox paradigm claimed its heavenly foundation. And it was another of a long line of spiritual movements to come into the heavenly domain, each perhaps serving a purpose. Each, perhaps, being a paradigm in a neverending series of paradigms to bring life, joy and fulfillment to all the creatures of the Universal Spirit.
The End
Michalax and his Equinoxxian Mistress
(The Equinox Paradigm Series – Story Five)
‘I never liked you, even when I tried to.’
‘Oh, don’t say that honey,’ responded Michalax to Natalie, his Equinoxxian mistresses, comment.
‘And why are you still here? Shouldn’t you get the hint?’
‘Oh, babe. Come on, you know I love you.’
She looked at him, decided the creep had learned his lesson, so softened. ‘Come on then – let’s fuck.’
‘That’s it babe. Play nice.’
‘Shut up.’
‘And you are looking your best.’
‘Shut up.’
‘And I’m knocking at your door.’
‘I still never liked you, bastard.’
‘Oh baby.’
5 hours later, after an afternoon of much shagging, Michalax was feeling drained. His Equinoxxian mistress had taken him for all his force, and he was spent. But that was the way with those of the Equinox Paradigm – they were literally sex mad, and when they wanted it, boy did they want it.
Christmas was coming up, and so putting the CD ‘The Razor’s Edge’ into a letter, with the song ‘Mistress for Christmas’ circled, he sent it in the mail to his Equinoxxian Mistresses address – on the other side of town.
Christmas came around.
‘I never liked you, you know. Despite the fact I am knocking at your door.’
‘Come on babe, lets fuck.’
‘I really don’t know why you are still hanging around in my life. I must be insane.’
‘Its cos I luv you babe. And I need a Mistress.’
‘I must be insane,’ she said again, as he led her into the bedroom.
4 months later, Natalie had had completely enough. She had taken Michalax to a pub, waited until he was wasted, and got up and sang karaoke the Rogue Traders ‘I Never Liked You.’
All the time she was staring at him, and he was looking guilty.
That night they had the best sex they’d ever had, and she was gone the following morning, not seen again by Michalax for many a long year.
‘She really did wave goodbye,’ he lamented to himself one October afternoon. ‘I guess she never really liked me anyway.’
The End
The Paradigm of Patience
(The Equinox Paradigm Series – Story Six)
Chapter One
Michalax sat with Marcus Lyant, whose wife Rebecca was sitting happily, knitting, of all the womanly things to do. They had parted life on earth recently and now, in heaven, were members of the growing Equinoxxian family, as it was called.
‘So what are your ambitions, Marcus? What do you hope to achieve?’
‘You are aware, Michalax, that I am still somewhat remembered in the outer world of heaven. In Equinox I am treated carefully, but dark figures still want vengeance over the slaying of Jaltar and, it is rumoured, Jaltar still lives. He is a creature unkillable, and his vengeance will be sure if I venture forth to make my name known once more.’
‘Karnos. Forgive me, Marcus. This is the struggle of life we have always faced. Evil has long been with us in these heavenly domains, for the Universal Spirit is patient and forebearing, hoping for repentance and right action. I have long lamented his mercy, which is quite ironic, but I too have known it, so complain I do not. Yet we can not hide from evil – we must face it and, in the strength of righteous valour, overcome its dark might. Do not fear Jaltar, for you are stronger than he.’
‘Be that as it may, Michalax, he is still a thorn in my side.’
‘Then you must have patience. For the equinox way teaches, as I understand it, that in the heart of balance there is neither apathy towards life yet, also, no great frettings or anxieties towards things. There is perfect patience, perfect peace, knowing that all comes in the goodness of time. For there is a time to hide, Marcus, but a time to confront evil, Karnos.’
‘Yes,’ he nodded. ‘There is.’
Chapter Two
Jaltar brooded. How to exact vengeance upon Karnos. How to exact vengeance. But he was stuck here, now, in a much lower level of hades. For evil, when it killed and was subsequently killed, went further down into the darkening pits of death and unlife. And here he was, surrounded by malevolent demons who cared not for him, and would slay him without a moment’s hesitation if he interfered with their darkened exile. Yet power was still his – and he had access once more to the upper realms, albeit only in a vague spirit sense, a shadow of himself, yet still capable of speaking temptations to the dark to those who would serve him. Yet the price was strict, for he could not return to his bodily home for many years should he choose to leave it, such being the price of spirit self. Yet he would again choose this evil, for he despised Karnos, and would slay Rebecca, his beloved bride, if he could but achieve such dark ends.
Chapter Three
Marcus sat in the hotel, near the centre were the Equinoxxian annual conference was being held, and looked out the window at the city of Joniquay, one of the diamond cities of heaven. And as he looked he noticed something – a dark, grey shadow, coming closer. And then, suddenly, it was upon him and he felt darkness and evil trying to swallow his very soul. He fell to the ground, vomiting, and suddenly became aware of the screaming of Rebecca. He ran, he ran, he ran so quickly, but his running, no matter how much he believed he could save her, no matter how much he told himself he would arrive in time, was never going to be enough. And he had known it as soon as the shadow of evil had touched him.
And then he looked at the charred remains of Rebecca’s body, and the broken window were the dark spirit had fled to, and bowed his head and wept. For the dark lord had claimed his beloved, and this time, he knew, his descent to the lowest pit of hell would be his last, for Jaltar would not be spared a second time, for he would finish the work of Gabralax. Yet the price was a very piece of his own soul, a very piece of his own dark pity.
And as he wept, he swore again his vengeance, and it verily seemed that the angels in heaven did weep.
The End
Joniquay at Night
(The Equinox Paradigm Series – Story Seven)
Michalax, Gabralax and Urilax hovered in the night skies of Joniquay. Down on earth Marcus Lyant laid wounded, but alive. And his beloved Rebecca returned to him, after a struggle with darkness.
The 3 Archangels stood in front of a portal which shimmered in the air in front of them, the place were Raphalax had disappeared to with the ashes of Jaltar.
Michael motioned towards a nearby tower, flooded with lights of all sorts of colours, burning brightly in the night sky. ‘This city is like few of the Diamond cities. So human in its ambitions.’
‘Yet it was put aside for mostly them,’ responded Gabralax.
‘In fact the children of Men make up around 90% of Joniquay’s population,’ said Urilax.
‘90%. Really. And were di d you learn that statistic?’ queried Michalax.
‘Hey, I still study,’ responded Urilax.
The angels hovered there, wings beating slowly, and the shimmering vortex continued shimmering.
‘Down there is a baseball match going on,’ said Urilax, pointing down to a baseball park down earthwards, the ground flooded with lights in the cool evening.
‘Is it one of your teams?’ asked Michalax.
‘I don’t know,’ responded Urilax. ‘They might be playing tonight, but I am not sure. I don’t follow that closely anymore. After 10 million games you sort of get the idea of what they are on about.’
‘Still, they are our eternal entertainment,’ put in Gabralax.
‘That they are,’ responded Urilax.
Down below Marcus Lyant was feeling a little better, nursing Rebecca.
‘She seems to be alright,’ said Urilax, pointing downwards to the human they had just rescued from the dark nether regions.
‘For the nightmares we went through she better be,’ responded Gabralax.
‘Still, she is a daughter of love,’ put in Michalax. ‘She is, I feel, destined for eternal life. God would not have us so actively involved with these children of the Equinox if not so.’
‘God?’ queried Urilax. ‘You know that term is no longer in vogue. You will slip up and let on about our ancient history. You know the children of men can not stomach the ancient standards.’
‘I was forgetting. The Universal Spirit.’ responded Michalax. ‘Please forgive me brother Urilax.’
‘You are forgiven,’ responded Urilax, with a grin on his face.
The Vortex continued shimmering, a whirl of hazy colours, burning brightly in the night sky.
‘He should be back shortly,’ said Michalax.
‘The Spirit may have much to say,’ put in Gabralax.
‘Jaltar’s time has come,’ responded Michalax. ‘The Spirit will agree with Raphalax’s request.
‘Let us hope so,’ said Gabralax. ‘I have had enough with this current war with the fallen.’
‘I fear our life is of this struggle,’ said Urilax. ‘It is our destiny for some reason.’
‘There is a purpose,’ responded Michalax. ‘And the struggle is not eternal.’
‘And you know this how,’ queried Gabralax.
‘I will not say,’ said Michalax. ‘It simply has a purpose. You both will understand in the fullness of time.’
The other two angels gazed at Michalax, yet said nothing. His words had said ample.
The Vortex suddenly came alive with a purple colour, then a swirling pink, and suddenly Raphalax burst through.
‘It is done. He has agreed,’ said Raphalax.
Michalax breathed a sigh of relief, and signaled their descent.
* * *
‘It is finished, Marcus. You will be bothered not again.’
‘Thank you, Michalax. Rebecca is breathing a little easier, but still too weak to say much. Can you take us home?’
As the angels carried Marcus and Rebecca back to their home, Michalax thought on that long struggle with darkness. It was not over yet, not by a long shot, but destiny was continuing ever onwards, and the day of vindication would come one day. And then their long earned rest, and peace for the Angels of the Universal Spirit.
THE END
A New Paradigm
(Story Eight in the Equinox Paradigm Series)
Ragulax, Phanulax and the dread Saruvilax were having a conference. An important conference.
‘Now, as you know,’ began Saruvilax, ‘People are very familiar with the big four, Michalax, Gabralax, Raphalax and Urilax. They are household names to many of them. And for many years now that is how they have promoted themselves. But there are 7 divine Archangels, and it is our responsibility to let people know this.’
Ragulax put up his hand. ‘And how are we to do that, dread Saruvilax. After all, they claim this position of 4 exalted angels from 1 Enoch chapter nine.’
‘Don’t call me dread Saruvilax. I can not possibly express how pissed off I am with that term these days.’
Phanulax grinned. ‘Yeh, dread Saruvilax. Good one Rags.’
Saruvilax looked disturbed, but got back to the agenda. ‘Now, brothers. There have been contenders over the years for positions in the divine seven. Chamulax competed heavily for a while. Jeremilax, Remilax and Saraqalax were also competitors. As was Sarilax. Yes, there have been a number who have tried to claim that top 7 slots. But remember, my dear brothers. There has never been an official designation in the sacred writings which has been universally accepted.’
‘So how are we going to get those slots,’ asked Ragulax. I mean, in Enoch chapter 20 the big 7 are Urilax, Raphalax, Ragulax, Michalax, Saraqalax, Gabralax and Remilax in that order. And I am third on that list, and that is about the most official list of the 7 big angels because it is in 1 Enoch. So why would I change.’
Phanulax interrupted. ‘But remember, dear brother Ragulax, in the second parables section of Enoch, in chapter 40, there are 4 angels of the presence, and these four glorious angels are in order Michalax, then Raphalax, then Gabralax, and fourth of all, not even Urilax, but my blessed self, the holy Phanulax. So Ragulax, Saruvilax. What have either of you to offer me? And, dear Saruvilax, were not your wondrous deeds only recorded much later on in history than our grand earlier accomplishments.’
‘It is difficult to know for sure,’ responded Saruvilax. ‘True, I have been unable to find references in the earlier literature, but I was known of. I am sure of that. Besides, the holy third volume of Haven’s Pseudepigrapha clearly established me as seventh on the list of divine angels. The Chronicles were quite clear, and therefore there shall be seven divine angels, and the children of Noah have spoken. The list in divine order shall be Michalax, Gabralax, Raphalax, Urilax, Ragulax, Phanulax and Saruvilax.’
‘If you say so,’ said Ragulax.
‘You have always been ambitious, dread Saruvilax,’ said Phanulax.
‘Don’t call me that. Now, how are we going to get our fame?’
‘I know. Why don’t we hold a conference,’ said Phanulax.
‘Aren’t we doing that now?’ queried Urilax.
‘No, I mean a conference of all the 7 Archangels. In Joniquay. We can sign autographs. It will be cool.’
Saruvilax held his forehead in frustration and said ‘Why me.’
‘Now listen,’ said Saruvilax. ‘We need something dramatic. Something memorable. Something epic.’
‘How about a movie. The 7 Divine Archangels,’ put in Urilax.
Saruvilax considered the idea. ‘Not a bad one. What’s the plot.’
‘Oh, I don’t know. We save the world from the dark lord. Something tragically epic. You know how they do them.’
‘Yes. Yes I do,’ responded Saruvilax. ‘I will think that idea over. Maybe write a plot.’
‘Hey, we can co-write, the three of us,’ responded Urilax. ‘It will be cool.’
‘Okely, Dokely,’ responded Phanulax.
‘Yes, I guess so,’ finished Saruvilax. ‘Then, I guess, that is the first move for our glory. An epic movie.’
‘And heaven will never be the same again,’ put in Urilax.
‘Amen to that,’ finished Phanulax.
‘Yes, Amen to that,’ put in Saruvilax, whose mind was on his glory.
THE END
‘The Power of the Equinox’
(Story Nine in the Equinox Paradigm Series)
Chapter One
Ragulax was masturbating. That was not surprising – Ragulax had often been called a bit of a wanker by his six esteemed Archangel brothers. And so, true to his name, the semen erupted onto his belly, he turned the shower on, washed it away, and went into his bedroom, to enjoy the rush which always came afterwards. Doralax – his woman – his twin – would no longer have sex with him. They did it often, usually, like rabbits. But she had gone off, to the edge of heaven, found an angel, and was fucking him hard, or so she claimed in her emails. Jealousy? Was she provoking him to jealousy? Who knew. Who cared. Wanking got the job done anyway.
Recently Ragulax had partaken of good news. An ancient mystery had been revealed by the Universal Spirit. The rankings of authority of the 7 Divine Archangels. Apparently, although it was all shrouded in a deep and mysterious past, Ragulax was the Firstborn of the 7 Divine Archangels, and thus represented the highest beacon of power in the Universal Realm of Heaven. Bloody good news. Perhaps he should use his influence on a young, nubile angel. Lure her into his den. Fuck HER brains out. Yeh. But whatever.
Saruvilax had sent him the script that morning. ‘The Power of the Equinox’ starring Marcus Lyant and Rebecca Lyant, with Koolda Smith and the 7 Divine Archangels. A Tragic romp with the demonic powers, with a cliff-hanger of an ending. It could prove fucking funny, and a hell of a time to film. He looked forward to it.
Other things were on his mind, especially finding another chick to relieve his masturbatory concerns, and thinking that, with his new found position of absolute charm, he would set out one of these Friday nights, find a nice club, find a nice babe, have a nice fuck. Sounded perfect.
Chapter Two
‘Melanie B. You are the sluttiest bitch of the spice attack. What do you think?’
‘Don’t call me a slut,’ said Melanie, and looked at the chalkboard. ‘Oh, I don’t know,’ she said in her fine Leeds accent. ‘I mean, Michalax is a great angel, and introducing with him is ok, but hasn’t it now been revealed that Ragulax is firstborn?’
Saruvilax looked at the chalkboard, rubbed out Michael’s name and wrote in Ragulax. Spice Attack had a role in the upcoming movie, and they were being asked for ideas about the new introductory scenes and endings for the movie.
Emma B spoke up. ‘Make Ragulax repenting of a recent gay encounter. That will get a laugh.’
‘Not a bad idea,’ responded Saruvilax thoughtfully.
‘Have him scratch his butt a lot,’ said Geri. ‘People always laugh at crude things. It is the way we are.’
‘Perfect’ responded Saruvilax, making the notes on the chalkboard.
‘Perhaps some VD concerns,’ suggested Victoria.
‘Right,’ nodded Saruvilax, scratching with the chalk on the board.
‘And debt concerns,’ finished Melanie C.
‘Rightey O,’ responded Saruviel. ‘Good ideas, girls.
Later on the girls were hanging around, and Ragulax had drifted in, chatting with Saruvilax, and was eyeing Melanie B.
‘Have you caught him looking,’ said Geri softly.
Melanie B said nothing.
‘He thinks your hot,’ said Emma.
Melanie B said nothing.
‘He probably has a good bank account figure,’ said Victoria.
Melanie B said nothing.
‘He could be a good shag,’ said Melanie C.
‘Good point,’ said Melanie B at last, and sidled over to Ragulax, who welcomed her warmly.
Chapter Three
‘You are a spunk, Mel B.’
‘You like to say that, don’t you Rags.’
‘But I mean it babe.’
‘Sure you do. I think, maybe, you just like a piece of ass, and thus the compliments.’
‘Don’t say that. You know I love you.’
‘Ha. Every bloke says that to a Spice Girl. We never stop hearing it.’
Raguel shot her a dejected glance, with apology written all over it, and she came over and gave him a hug.
‘Still, Ragulax, you are a good sort in your own way. A strange being – not a regular deity. Something weird about you, I think. Like the old days are still in you. The old ‘Angel’ ways.’
‘Some things never die, babe. Just the way I am. Let’s shag.’
She smiled. ‘Sure. But tell me this, won’t your twin get jealous? I am shagging her man after all.’
‘Doralax is currently being unfaithful,’ he said stoutly. ‘I don’t think I even need to care about any of her proud protestations. The bitch can screw herself.’
Melanie noted the heated expression in his eyes. Jealousy, she thought to herself.
They screwed for a while, and Ragulax went to the kitchen to get some juice. It was a hot night, and as he stared from the back porch out at Joniquay, Mel came and joined him.
‘You should call her.’
‘She’s a bitch,’ he responded.
‘I have a man, you know Rags. Deep down, our twin is the fundamental. Everyone knows that in the end. Sure, I can screw around from time to time. I do. But my bloke, Yomiel, is for me forever, in the end. I always go back to him.’
Ragulax stared at the city, thinking on her words. ‘Yes. Some things don’t change, Mel. I know that. The relationship between me and the goddess Doralax has been a rocky one for a long time. She usually does her own thing in the end, rather than committing. But, yes. We care for each other. I might call her a bitch. I might.’ He left off.
Melanie stared at the city, following his view, then turned to him. ‘You might call her a bitch?’
‘But I still love her,’ he finished. She nodded. Good for Ragulax. Good for him.
Chapter Four
‘Doralax. It’s me. Rags.’
‘What do you want?’
‘To see you babe.’
‘Ha. That’s a good one.’
‘I miss you.’
She softened. ‘Really? Your not just saying that?’
‘Sure. I miss you. We belong together.’
‘You’ve said that before.’
‘Fuck it. I’ve come to my senses. Seen the light. The Divine Firstborn angel of Infinite Glory realizes he needs his twin. Can’t live without you, I’m afraid.’
‘And If I come back. You’ll give me the attention you have lacked previously.’
‘Sure. A Rose a day if you like.’
She laughed. ‘Ha, very funny Rags. 3 days, and that will be that. I know you.’
‘Probably,’ he replied honestly.
‘Look, why do you really want me back? This is the way it is between us, isn’t it? This is the status quo? We do our stuff together, occasionally, and fuck off back to our own lives afterwards.’
‘Perhaps you are growing on me’, he said honestly.
There was silence on the phone, as if she was thinking over that point.
‘Growing on you?’ she finally said. ‘Your starting to appreciate me then?’
‘No. Just getting used to you.’
She was pissed at that, but gave him a break. ‘Well, getting used to your twin is a start, I suppose. The best of relationships start with familiarity.’
‘Exactly,’ he responded.
‘Is someone pushing you into this, Rags?’
‘There might be. A Spice Attack girl I have been shagging. Told me the twin is the biggest thing in the end. It struck me. Perhaps it’s true. Perhaps that is what works in the end.’
‘And you’d like to find out if that is true or not?’ she asked him.
‘I think so. I mean, don’t get me wrong Dorry. We have known each other forever. Since the beginning, I guess. We’ve been there for each other many times. I do love you, you know, but you have always been a sister with her own mind and will, and I’ve had to accept that. But perhaps it should be more now, you know. Perhaps we have had long enough to work out our differences. Perhaps, now, we should try and make it work.’
She didn’t respond straight away, but eventually spoke. ‘Look, I don’t know Rags. So bloody much is said about the twin thing both ways. Sure, I wouldn’t actually want to change from you, coz your great, but I don’t think we have to be man and woman together forever. I’m not sure if I want that. Do you? Really? Or is a spice girl who is making you think this?’
‘I. I don’t know,’ he responded.
‘Exactly,’ she said. ‘Look, thanks, but no thanks. Sure, I appreciate the offer, but it would have to be more than that Raguel. It would have to be you, in the end. It would have to be your own heart, your own decision. And deep, deep down, I think you know that is true. No Spice Girl can choose your eternal mate. It has to be dear old Ragulax.’
‘Your right – of course.’ He went silent. It was settled.
‘Well, you ok then Dorry? Everything’s fine?’
‘Mostly. Look, can’t talk now, and I appreciate the offer. You need to work those issues out for yourself, brother of mine. Get back to me if Raguel himself ever really means it.’ There was another voice he could hear speaking to her and she said ‘Bye’ and hung up.
He put the phone down, looked at the picture of his twin in his hand, and sighed. Wishful thinking, in reality. Nothing more than that. But, besides. She was right. It had been Melanie putting the thoughts in his mind.
He walked out the back, to the porch, sat down, picked up his unfinished juice, and sighed. Another day in heaven. A movie still to shoot. And a randy spice girl to fuck as much as possible while he was dating her. In the end, as they say, life went on. And issues like twins and romance could wait for another day, for Raguel was tired, needed some sleep, and perhaps a wank to put him to that sleep.
He finished his juice, retired inside, and after a suitable wank to a favourite porno, put to rest thoughts of Doralax being his hearts deepest answer, and dreamed happy dreams of Melanie naked, a number one at the box office, and an unfortunate spate of a particularly dastardly Venereal disease. Now where on earth did he get that, his dream self thought to itself, as he tossed and turned through another fateful nights adventures.
The End
The Equinox Completed
(The Final Story 10 in the Chronicles of the Infinite Realm of Majesty)
The Infinite Realm of Majesty was infinite. Perhaps that was an obvious way of saying it. Its scope, depth, and true majesty knew no limits, nor did its physical space or geography. It sat on a Discworld which went on in every direction for unlimited measure. In fact, so the Firstborn Archangel of the Infinite Realm of Majesty, Ragulax, assured everyone, God had told him quite precisely the realm was exactly that – Infinite.
And it was majestic – in God’s own words – truly majestic.
The purposes of the Equinox in God’s own plans were to teach the truths of the balance of nature, of good and bad, of hot and cold, of love and hate, and all degrees in between. Equinox explained the mystery of balance – harmonizing between dual forces – and the angel Melanie – Melanie Brown – a spice girl of quite vivacious personality – was God’s ultimate instrument in the purposes of the Equinox in the Realm of Infinite Majesty.
But it was a destiny unbeknownst to herself.
Ragulax was an unordinary angel, but was also markedly conservative in many ironic ways in opposition to his spirit of unordinariness. But, so he hoped, with a conservativeness which was truly expressive – if such a thing were possible.
Ragulax, having bedded the angel Melanie, was to father children later on through this angel who would become the powers of the Realm of Majesty. The Key Powers.
There were several monarchs of various new kingdoms which differing children would establish and, one by one, they would build up the centre – for in an everexpanding realm it was always the centre – and dominate the land ownership and dominate the kingdoms and hearts of the angels and men of God.
It was scaries passion. Scaries power. Scaries presence. She was a natural leader, and inspired within her offspring to the firstborn ruler of the world a passion and determination to go for broke and challenge all conventions in creation of your own glory.
And her messages to his and her offspring worked – and they prospered.
The completion of the Equinox was the completion of all things. It was harmonizing desire for growth, expansion and eternity, with the desire for sameness, stability and the unchanging finite. To master the equinox – to find the centrepoint – was to be in the centre of life, the centre of existence, were all flowed along an eternal pathway, yet all flowed with eternal stability and immovable faith in truth, life and self. And God, of course – the unchanging, unchangeable, eternal creator.
The Infinite Realm of Majesty was and is a work of the Most High God. It represents much of his glory, much of his design, much of his purpose. It sees its fulfilment in the fifthborn angel Raguel, but stands alone as a pinnacle of wisdom in its own right.
It is a creation of God.
It is loved by God.
It is a principle, a paradigm, a vision, a wisdom statement, a very principle and axiom of the divine thought.
And it is eternal.
And it is infinite.
And in it all things, ultimately, are as they should be, and all things remain in the heart of God, in the plan of God, in the wisdom of God, to be fulfilled in the fullness and goodness of God’s good and infinite time.
And all the angels shall say Amen.
THE END
Melaniel the Magnificent Child of Majesty
Melanie was a Spice Girl, as well as being the angel Melaniel, twin to Yomiel.
Mel B. An intense bloody wunderkid of extreme sarcasm, these days
especially, and a really scarey sexuality. Boy did she impress the boys.
She lived in the Infinite Realm of Majesty, currently had a crush on Raguel, the Archangel Firstborn
of the Realm, whom she called cute, and was living the life. The intense life of number one Spice
Girl, Queen of Fashion, Queen of Fitness, Queen of her own vanity to many, but she was humble
and lovely about it all. Eddie showed up, a lot, cracking jokes, playing those bloody Crazy Frog
tunes, and crapping on about Beverly Hills Cop 700 and something, were they were currently
up to, one of the more popular series. And their daughter Angel was huge, at the moment,
celebrity superstar rising up to challenge mum, if at all possible.
She had work on the Australian X Factor constantly, arguing with Nat Bass, smiling at that
cute Guy Sebastian, singing with Ronan a lot, which made the audience always smile, and
being generally cool, controversial, and usually the most popular on the show. Usually.
She had a good life, felt like she was a magnificent child of majesty, a child of God most
high, and loved her life and everything in it, had a state of mind that she was were she needed
to be, and was doing what she was supposed to be doing, working constantly on her new
albums for both her solo identity and with the Spicies, and, for the most part, content with
all and sundry which wandered into the world of Melanie the Magnificent.
And then there was the Universal Truth Assembly, and a very weird Daniel Daly, who constantly
asked her to join, and this particular Seraphim Angel, which she knew vaguely from earlier years,
seemed to have a passion for her like few others.
She would consider him.
Melanie, in the end, was happy with life. She was happy with the Infinite Realm of Majesty.
She was happy with Raguel. She was happy with God.
But a crossroads was coming up for Melanie, a time of a challenge, a time of a new beginning,
perhaps even a new love.
A time of a new destiny.
And life, for this child of gentle humour, would never be quite the same again.
It would seem.
The End
Angel
Daniel looked at Angel. She was a minxy little thing. He really was not sure, really, wether
he should crack onto her or not. I mean, come on, you couldn't chase a child and her mother.
That was unscriptural. Certainly a sin. Certainly.
Yet he gawked at her anyway, over in the backup singing section of the Spice Girls rehearsal
studio here in the heart of Joniquay, noticing her gentle manner, her beautiful looks, and
feminine beauty. Gosh, like her mother, she was hot. He couldn't. He shouldn't. He did.
'Hey babe,' he said.
Angel Smiled at him.
'You know, I like your mother. Always have. But you and me could be good together.'
'I like you Daniel. But you know, keep on dreaming. Not after my mum. No way in
hell.'
'I know what you are saying. I have similar convictions. I suppose that is the nature of
truth in the end. And Torah might be right in many ways. Perhaps it does speak on these
human truths. These truths of nature.'
'It would just be fucking weird,' said Angel, but smiled at him anyway, and just shook her head.
'I mean, leave mum alone, for a long time,' she said, and turned to look at the song leader.
They started up playing, and Angel turned back to him. 'Leave mum alone. And maybe, ok.
Someday. Maybe. Your ok.'
'Cool,' said Daniel.
He left off, put on his CD Walkman, clicked on to track 7 of the album 'Michael' by
Michael Jackson, and got out to his Aston Martin, took off for home, and was thinking
of Angel all the time.
Perhaps he did like her more than her mother. Perhaps he liked them both. But, fuck,
that was weird. Wasn't it. And that was the truth, wasn't it. The universal truth, wasn't
it? The Truth.
He buzzed along, thought it over, but reached no conclusion. Not that day, anyway.
Take some time to think about it. Maybe write some doctrine on the idea. Talk with
the elders in the Assembly about it. The truth of that particular issue, something long
left alone due to Rainbow Torah concerns, particularly from the Assembly of the Living
God who judged the UTA quite a bit on non-absolute RT issues. They were concerned -
they didn't want to be affected by judgements of Israel.
And that was the truth.
Wasn't it.
The Truth.
MMMMMmmmm.
The End
The Truth, the Whole Truth and Nothing but the Truth
Madelaine Costigan sat with Prime Possum, who was drunk, off his face, almost tempted,
so he whispered her, to get stuck into the Win Wombat. Winnie was cute, so Prime
said. Gemma the Gem Girl, who dressed as a fairy in green, was also on Prime's hit list.
'And I suppose you fancy Go Gorilla as well,' suggested Madelaine.
Prime whispered in her ear. 'You know I'm not gay, but I will keep that in mind.'
'Mmm,' nodded Madelaine. 'Very funny, poss. we have a show to get to in 5 hours. You
gonna be up for it.'
'I'll need some Possum Coffee,' he whispered in her ear.'
She went off to the Prime Kitchenette, and she used the teaspoon to heap in the coffee
she thought on her situation in life. Here she was, living in the Infinite 'Realm of Majesty,
stuck in Canberra, as always, living here forever it seemed. She got to travel with her
job occasionally, which she enjoyed, but she sometimes wondered if there was more to
life. Stacie Orrico was probably right. There probably was. But what could she do about
it? It was strange. She was an attractive lady, yet men seemed somewhat elusive.
Unable to nab that permanent partner. Still, someone would come along some day.
She gave Prime the coffee, and he sipped it down, and nodded at her. 'I feel better,'
he whispered to her.
Later on at home, looking through the mail, she found the flyer. 'Universal Truth
Assembly. Need the meaning? Need the point? Need the truth? Need the
answer? Try us. We studied the lot.
An interesting theological boast, she thought to herself. They studied the lot. Really.
Well, if they did, they would surely have the romance answers she needed. But
she doubted it. Still, it was an older movement in the Realm of Majesty, now, and
seemed to be growing. She ran into some of them from time to time. Strict
in some ways, loving. Very honest. Very, very honest about it all. Perhaps that
was their greatest virtue after all.
She looked at the flyer, thought 'What the heck,' dialled the number and as a
voice answered and said Hello, she said, 'Hi. This is Madelaine. I need the
truth.'
And that was the beginning of a whole new adventure.
The End
The X Factor
Natalie Bassingthwaite looked at the nude picture of Shannon Noll.
'What you doing with at?' asked Melanie, coming into the girls dressing room.
'Oh shit,' said Natalie, and quickly tried to hide the magazine.
'You naughty girl,' said Melanie. 'What would Mrs Noll say?'
'Shut up,' said the embarassed Natalie. 'I can't help it. He's so cute.'
'You've been tryin to get im on X Factor for years. But he's contracted to
the other channel.'
'Contracts don't last forever,' said Natalie. 'Of all people you should know
that. In this topsy turvy world of celebrity.'
'Aye. I do. But Shannon likes the work at the other place, we are not
legally allowed to mention.'
She pulled out the magazine and continued staring at her agelong crush.
'His, um, thing,' said Melanie. 'I'll bet you'd like to get your hands on it
then.'
Natalie drooled, and Melanie B just smiled.
'I'll bet you'd like to wrap your luscious lips all around his hot...
'Melanie Brown,' she interrupted savagely. 'Keep your mind out of the
gutter.'
'Ay, I don't think it's my mind at's in the gutter.'
Natalie glared at her, and returned to the pornographic picture.
'Forget it,' said Melanie. 'You'll never nab him. He's the faithful kind.'
'I know,' said Natalie. 'But we are so good together. He's what I need.'
'Is that the truth, then? He's what you need? There are plenty of other
fish in the sea.'
'I know. But Shannon is a suitable mate. We have a cultural identity
together. An historical match musically. That works well, I think.'
'You'll get over it,' said Melanie. 'Its just a crush. They finish in the end.
So many of my fans have come and gone, realizing in the end they loved
the image of Melanie Brown, and not Melanie Brown.'
'Its not the same,' said Natalie. 'We get along amazingly well.'
'Then marry him then. Be his second wife.'
'Oh, I couldn't do that. No. No thats not right.'
'Oh, so that's the truth then. Monogamy.'
Natalie looked at Melanie. 'Well, yes. It is, isn't it? That's the right way in the
end, isn't it?'
Melanie looked at her, but did not answer. '5 minutes till show,' she said.
'And you better hide the magazine.'
Natalie looked one last time over Shannon's glory, and hid the magazine,
and got to her work. But it was a flame of love soon to erupt into quite a scene
of true X Factor controversy. And for Natalie to survive the impending scandal,
she would need the X Factor itself, for the scathings of the paparazzi and the
media, in true Realm style, were sure to be quite intense indeed.
And the show went on, and Natalie went home, and gawked at her picture
of Shannon on her bedroom wall, and life went on. And Shannon Noll
was still none the wiser.
The End
Actually, Love
Sariel studied the scroll of Daranok that Gloryel had given to him.
'Wisdom of a demon,' he thought to himself.
'Who do you love? Is it me?' Gloryel asked him.
'Oh, most definitely you. But if Janet Jackson becomes available, let me know, ok.'
'Brother,' she said.
'You know, Geraldine, as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, I have an awful
amount of things to do.'
'What is your point?' she asked, eating a banana.
'I hardly have time to study this thing.'
'Oh, its good. Daranok has gotten over it. He's now showing, well, a lot of love, actually.'
'Well that is good,' said Sariel.
'I have a joke for you,' said Sariel. 'Daniel told it to me. What do you call a lady with one leg shorter than the other?'
Gloryel shrugged.
'Ilene,' he said.
She smiled.
'And what do you call a chinese lady with one leg shorter than the other?'
She shrugged again.
'Irene,' he said.
'Oh, thats racist, she said, but she giggled anyway.
'So. Will you apply for Arch Regency? the millennia is nearly over,' Gloryel asked him.
'I think Yomiel is pushing for it,' responded the Prime Minister.
'Well. Challenge him.'
'Mmm. Maybe. Probably not. He has not served in the position before, and I have had a number of terms in office. Perhaps
I should let it go this time.'
'That's not the Sariel I know,' said Gloryel. 'The Sariel I know is always up for the work. Always ready to be responsible.'
'But maybe Yomiel is as well, dear Gloryel. Maybe he likes the glory also.'
She looked at him, considered challenging the statement, but softened. 'I suppose so. But I think I would, ok. Just to let
you know. I would claim as much as possible. Let others work hard for it. Why be so soft.'
'Because all you need is love,' said Sariel.
She sat down next to him. 'But I love the glory, Hugh. Don't settle for second best. Be number one.'
'And Love forgives all things,' responded Hugh.
'There can be only one,' smiled geri, playing the game somewhat.
'And love conquers all,' said Hugh.
'Yet I am the one, the only one, I am the God of Kingdom Come,' she said, with a strong dose of loving surrrendered sarcasm.
'And I love you forever, Glory child. I love you forever.'
'And always,' she responded.
And she kissed him, and they settled down for the evening, and all was good and wonderful and holy and perfect and loving
and eternal. And complete.
The End
U.K. State of Mind
Scragging around Leeds, on a pub run, doing bugger all, getting drunk, Emma looking wild with Jovius, Geri laughing at Daniel's stupid jokes, and David Rothchild doing his best impersonation of a Saint, abstaining, promising to drive them all home, Melanie Brown was in a good mood.
'Hey. Lets drive to Hull,' said Daniel.
'We can't do that,' said David. 'Its too late, and I promised Ruth we would get home by Midnight.'
'Fuck it,' said Melanie, and took the next left, and as they headed off for the Unitary Authority, Daniel grinned, and David took out his mobile, sent a text message to his great grandmother of several generations, and looked out the window at the passing city, which slowly melded into countryside as they took off to Hull.
The city was dead when they arrived, but Daniel knew a quiet pub which had 24 hour drinking rights, 'Sleazos', and they crawled in, still only mildly intoxicated, and sat down near the back, but the Rolling Stones Jumping Jack Flash on the jukebox, and ordered beers, ales, soft drink for David and other beverages.
'So, David. How do you know Daniel?' Melanie asked Mr Rothchild.
'Old friends. From years ago,' said the Computer programmer. 'We designed 'Realm Wars' together, with a friend of mine in my company. John Karamoss.'
'Realm Wars?' asked Melanie, looking at Daniel. 'That's not that Megadrive success series, is it?'
'We design them,' said David, sipping on his Coca Cola. 'Daniel occasionally contributes these days, ideas and stuff, but Xadonemmetry Video Games produces them.'
'We're partners in Xadonemmetry,' said Daniel. 'I take a 45% cut for all the original design and copyright principles, but they mostly do the work now. A good deal for me, somewhat, but I have a minimum contribution requirement for each instalment to honour the contract.'
'He usually gets the job done,' said David, looking at his old friend.
'Realm Wars rules,' said Jovius. 'But you need to expand to X-Box. Far greater power.'
'Not needed,' said Daniel. 'The limitations of the game as it was conceived, restricted it to Megadrive capabilities by deliberate choice. It's an ethical principle I wanted with it.'
'Why?' asked Geri, taking an interest.
'Because I have a fond heart towards my old Commodore 64, and really wanted to think about the reasonable limits of gaming possibilities within its standard framework.'
'Ethics,' said Geri. 'Well, how many disks is the maximum for TIB Drive C64 games?'
'45,' said Daniel.
'60,' said David.
'Well I think 50 is perfect,' said Melanie.
'One Million,' said Emma, cheekily.
The group laughed at that.
'So what is John like?' asked Melanie, eager to take a possible opportunity.
'He's a good guy,' said David.
'Funny,' said Daniel.
'And the three of you work well together?' she inquired further.
David looked at Daniel. 'Pretty much.'
'Will you design U.K. State of Mind for me? I have pages of notes for the project. I need a competent designer.'
'What's it about?' asked David.
'The Spice Girl fanclubs at war from the U.K., on political and business agendas, to claim world glory. I need online interaction in a Sim City variant. I have heaps of pages on it. Key business strategies are meant to be music, fashion, makeup and sports related, as well as jewellery and other girlie things. The object is for it to develop into status points in the U.K. state of Mind Universe for ever increasing rights and priveliges. And I need heaps of fun subgames.'
'Sounds ok,' said David.
'And the album is the soundtrack, ok.'
'Cool,' said David.
They partied into the wee hours, and when Melanie got home early the following morning, her head was full of soon to be realized ambitions of even greater glory for the magnificent Melaniel the Spice Girl.
The End
Stuck in Hull
Melaniel watched the fly climb slowly up the wall. It poked around for a bit and then took off again, and shortly disappeared out the window. She looked out after it and then returned her gaze to the wall. There WERE posters on it,at least. There WAS something to look at. But bugger all else. She sat there,bored. Finally she turned to the one way glass mirror on the opposite wall which she couldn't see through. 'I hope you are enjoying this,' she said out loud. 'It sure bores the fuck out of me,' she said under her breath.'
A voice came over an intercom. 'Remember, Melanie. We're not here. For the exercise you have to think you are alone.'
'Yeh, right. Whatever,' she said.
She looked around the room, and finally noticed the little box under the other lounge seat.
'She's noticed it,' a voice said in the control room.
'Get cameras on her face. We don't want to miss anything,' said the other.
As the hidden ones watched, Melanie B got down on her knees, retrieved the tin box and looked at it. There was a lock on it. A combination lock of 3 digits.
'For fuck's sake,' she said swearing, but starting at 000 she worked through her numbers only to screech 'Bastards' as the number 986 finally undid the lock.
She glared at the one way mirror. Inside David almost smiled.
'She's cute when she's angry,' said Daniel.
David nodded in agreement.
The box open she found the note. 376 x 123,489 - 456,722 =
She glared at the mirror again. She hated maths questions.
But as she worked it out slowly she came to 45,975,142, and typed that into the pad against the locked door. She hit the accept button and, watching nervously, the door bolted open.
'Alleluia,' she said. 'At fucking last.' She walked through and the door quickly closed behind her. In the new room, much the same again, but a toilet in a small cubicle with a shower and soap, and a tiny kitchenette with a fridge. She quickly looked inside. 17 Mars bars, a pint of fresh milk, and one egg and lettuce sandwich. She poured herself a glass of water and sat down eating the sandwich. Then she looked at the bookcase and noted the various items and looked at the small mattress on the floor. There was a light sheet and one pillow. But it was warm enough inside, so she would be fine. And then she looked at the other door and noticed the same electronic lock, and started figuring this was probably how the rest of the challenge would go. And, of course, Daniel and David would be behind the mirror in this room also.
'How many rooms?' she asked the mirror, munching on her sandwich.
'We can't really tell her that,' said Daniel to David.
'But we don't want to piss her off. It doesn't have to be 100% lifelike. Its only research for a videogame in the end. We can give her a break,' said David.
'Fine. Ok,' said Daniel.
David's voice came over the intercom. 'There are12. But we shouldn't have told you that.'
'Right,' said Melanie to herself, and summed up the challenge. 12 rooms, probably all the same size, and an increasing challenge to crack the number code each time. Still, for the sake of 'UK state of mind', someone had to do it.
* * * * *
Room 5. Melanie was stumped. It had taken two days to work out room two, a whole week for room three, and 17 days for room four. She had been in room 5 for a full month and no solution, and her supplies in this room were starting to run low. And the sign on the wall reading 'It's obvious' was really starting to piss her off. She had insulted the mirror more than once because of it.
Finally she caved. She looked into the mirror and asked, 'What is so obvious, then?'
The intercom came on and a voice said, 'That you're stupid.'
She glared at the mirror, but kept her tongue for once.
'That wasn't very nice, Daniel,' said David in the control room.
'She's thick as a brick. This is one of the easier ones.'
'She just hasn't worked it out yet,' said David. He spoke into the intercom. 'It's a lot easier than you think, Mel. Keep this one simple.'
'Easy for you to say,' said Melanie, and hooked into a Mars bar.
She sat on the couch, looking around the room. 'What is so obvious then?' she asked herself. Three bookcases, no clues on any book pages. A desk with their notes. A computer with Microsoft on it but one file which reads 'try again'. And an assortment of knick knacks. But no bloody clues. I mean, why is room number five so obvious?' she asked herself.
A thought suddenly struck her. Obvious about room 5. No it couldn't be that simple.
She stood, walked to the number panel, shrugged, typed in the number 5 and hit the button. And the door jolted open. She smiled, but before she left the room she walked over to the mirror, said, 'bastards,' and went on to the next challenge.
'She's worked it out at last!' exclaimed Daniel.
'See, she's not that stupid,' responded David smiling.
'We'll see,' said Daniel. 'Let's see if she can work out room six.'
'Yes, let's,' said David, as they slid their seats down the control desk to the next room's viewing mirror.
* * * * *
'Room nine and doing fine,' she said to herself. 5 months of crypticity and intense logic and Melanie Janine Mandela Brown was a new woman. But how long she would be stuck in Hull in this conundrum of a maze yet she did not know. Still, she was stronger and harder for the experience so far and would not quit. No way would she ever, now, press the big red 'Escape' button on each room's wall. No way.
'Are you enjoying yourself?' asked a voice over the intercom. 'You don't look like you have bothered with anything yet?'
Melanie ignored the voice and continued watching 'Spiceworld 7' on the DVD player. All 25 were on the rack.
'I'll get to it,' she finally replied.
In the control room, David turned to Daniel. 'You think she really will watch all 25 of them?'
'Instinctive, I'd say. She must know.'
A few days later, putting in the final disc and settling down for the girls ultimate adventure, the disc simply failed to show any screen. She cleaned the disc, but nothing.
'Bastards,' she yelled at the mirror. Daniel and David were used to that. And then she looked more carefully at what she thought was the clock on the top left of the screen, and noticed it was in fact just a number. She read it to herself, typed it into the keypad, pressed the button, and the door yet again jolted open. She went to the mirror, smiled, shook her head and was just about to speak when Daniel's voice came over the intercom, saying, 'Don't say it. We know. Bastards.'
'Exactly,' said Melanie B, and hopped off to room nine.
'She might even make it,' said David.
'Room 12 will get her. She is only a Spice Girl,' said Daniel.
'You really are a bastard, aren't you,' said David.
'Exactly,' responded Daniel, grinning madly.
* * * * *
1 year nearly up, and she didn't have much time left, for that was the maximun duration of the challenge. And as she finally exited room 11 in triumph, she looked at the clock. 2 hours to midnight. The last day.
'You haven't a hope,' said Daniel over the intercom.'
The room was full of thousands of books, and a few other minor items. She took a coke from the new fridge, collapsed on the bed and gazed at the room. It had been a valiant effort, but she couldn't possibly hope to win now. They had bested her. She laid there, almost sobbing. All that work. All that struggle. To fall just short, after all that effort. Life really was ironic. Thanks Alanis Morrisette. She looked up at the ceiling, cried out 'give me a break,' and turned over sobbing.
Nearly two hours later she was quiet. Humbled. She had come so far, only to fall just short. How bloody ironic. She looked at the clock. 10 minutes to go. She would have to put on a brave face.
She sat up, looked around the room one last time, and then gave up, sitting their glumly. What else could she do.
And then, a quiet little voice, whispered into the back of her mind, 'Try the scroll.' Another voice responded to the first one, though, and said, 'Don't bloody tell her, ok. Cheat.'
Reluctantly Melanie got to her feet, retrieved the one and only scroll from the bookcase, and unrolling it read, 'Beginning of beginnings, the start of an endless journey. The answer you seek is on the first day you were born.'
Melanie cogitated.
'Try your birthdate, dimwit,' a voice said over the intercom.
She got up quickly, punched in her birthdate and started hearing the chimes from the grandfather clock start chiming to 12.
'Shit,' she said, as she had entered the wrong date.
'Come on Melanie. You can do this,' she said, calming herself down. And as she correctly entered her birthdate and hit the button, the door jolted open and she burst through just before the 12th chime.
All of a sudden a huge bang and rushing into the room came Geri, Melanie C, Victoria and Emma and many other familiar faces, all crashing into her, clapping her and patting her on the back. And 'Wannabe' started playing, and party food was brought out.
And, finally, Daniel and David appeared, and David smiled at her, 'Brilliant, Melanie Brown,' he said, and she hugged him. But Daniel looked at her and said, 'You just got lucky, kid.'
Melanie stared at her adversary, took David by the arm and flirted back to Daniel, saying, 'Unlike YOU tonight, KID!'
And she laughed madly, escaping away with her night's lover, leaving a mad Daniel grinning and shaking his head, saying, 'Bastard.'
And then Geri grabbed him, gave him a kiss, and said 'Come on lover. I'll give you a break,' and the following year UK State of Mind was a smash hit all summer long.
The End
Confused
'So. Will you be faithful?'
David. lying along Melaniel in their rather lavish bed in eastern Hull, was confused. Are we together now, you mean? That this is something serious?'
Melaniel sat up, stared at him in silence for a few moments, then got up naked and walked ver to the fridge in the rather expensive hotel suite. It was summer in Hull at the moment, and it was almost hot for an English climate. She even had a bit of sweat on her.
She returned to the bed, drinking a can of Sprite, and looked over him, lying there, naked. She was aroused.
'I'm with someone,' he said, turning over.
'Meludiel?' she asked him.
''Usually. But not at the moment. It's a girl I feel like I've known many a lifetime. Justine. Justine Atkinson. We're - together.'
'But you cheated,' said Melanie, whose hand had drifted down to his crotch, and she was stroking him.
'Yeh. I cheated. Forgive me. I'm an old man now. It doesn't change my fidelity to Justine.'
Melanie continued pumping, and put her mouth down and took him in. She spoke again. 'If I can give you your best orgasm in years, leave her. Stay with me for a while. Date me for a while.'
'Sure thing honey,' said David casually.
And then, in response, Melanie went wild, and her hands and tongue were all over his body, she slid her breasts all down his front, and then took his cock inside her mouth and sucked until he groaned quite loudly and let loose into her mouth.
'Holy fuck!' he exclaimed.
'I save these ones. Spend some time with me,' she said. 'UK State of mind will be finished soon enough, and we can live here for a while. Stuck in Hull. You know, maybe have a couple of kids together. A change for David.'
'You'll pray for eggs?' he asked her.
'I'll even fill out the form for the department of fertility. Just to make it completely official. We'll make an official request for 2 children. I'm sure God won't mind the work.'
David went and got showered, and soon was in front of her, starting to dress - day was starting to dawn.
'Look. Let me think about it, ok. Its a change. I have been settled with Justine for a long while now. Haven't been looking for change. But I'll think about it.'
'Do,' said Melanie, and went off to shower.
* * * * *
'What, you think you have feelings for Melanie?' asked Daniel from behind the control panel, as they started retrieving some of the key data from their year long studies on the challenge set Melaniel.
'No. Not really. But she wants some time together. I don't know. I love Justine at the moment.'
'Is she good in bed?' Daniel asked David.
'I'm not that simple,' said David in response.
Daniel turned to him. 'Some times it really is that fucking simple, bro. Some times it really is that simple.'
David stared at him, considering the point.
* * * * *
Opening the door to the ring of the bell for her Eastern Hull Apartment, Melaniel looked at David standing there, a moving truck down on the road, smiling like a fool.
'What gives?' she asked.
'You want a fuckbuddy. I'll be your fuckbuddy.'
'Crude bastard,' she said, bringing him inside.
She looked at him. 'Sex. Your moving in with me to have lots of sex.'
'It's what you wanted, isn't it?'
'Well try not to be so bleeding obvious about it all. You know what the neighbours might say.'
'I'll keep a lid on it,' said David.
As his stuff moved in that afternoon, Melanie kept on looking at David, sitting in her lounge, typing away at his laptop, the afternoon light shining upon him. He looked cute. She was randy.
When the movers had finished their bit, she sidled over to him, put her arm around him and asked him, 'Well, lover. Are you in the mood for it?'
And, of all the ironies, David turned to her and said, 'Busy at the moment. Lot of work to do. We'll do something later sweetcheeks,' and returned his focus to his laptop.
'Brilliant,' said Melanie sarcastically, and picked an apple from the fruit bowl, bit into it and, munching down the fruit looked at David and realized he would not be that easy a nut to crack after all.
So she would have to get 'Serious'.
The End
Bedding David Rothchild
'I'm not that easy, Melanie Brown.'
'I'm sure your not,' she said, and took another puff on her cigarette. She was smoking Port Royal at the moment, and rolling her own ciggies, as she had gone off the pre-made cigarettes for a while, 'Tailors' as they were called, being 'Tailor-Made'. She looked at David, took a swig from her honeycomb schnappz, took another puff on her ciggie, and said it again. 'You will be in my pants tonight, for you find me irresistible, right?'
'Are you trying to be the female Terminator?' David asked her.
'The Terminatrix?' she asked him.
'Very funny,' he responded, and left his laptop and came and sat next to her. He took her hand, kissed it and said 'My fair lady. While you scare the living dickens out of me many a day, your charm's are indeed legendary. I would be honoured to bed you this evening. Except, unfortunately, work committments intervene. Surely a maiden as accustomed to the real workings of society understands such an important truth.'
She got down on her knees, undid his zip, and looked up at him as he didn't resist. 'I watched 'Student Services' last night. A French film. The student had to work to make a buck as well. Fuck for a buck, literally, if you know what I mean.'
'I am familiar with the film,' he responded, looking down at her as her hand started stroking his released member.
'Well, I promise you a divine encounter which would make her blush. Just stay home tonight. I am in the mood. Come on, Davie.' And then she took him in her mouth, and soon he couldn't take the pressure, and his groan and eruption into her mouth told her she had claimed her victory.
She came back from the shower, and he looked drained, funnily enough, but he shook his head. 'Sorry Mel. I really appreciate that, but work is a priority at the moment. I am still building up a portfolio of products for our firm, and these are the crucial years for many of us in the Realm of Majesty. As you know there is a diversity of Copyrights still available, and the blessings for those people who can nab the remaining copyrights of decent nature are enormous in the eternal before us. I won't ever have to work again later on and can afford a 'world-changing' income from all the things we have created.'
She sat down next to him. 'Fine. A Spice Girl does actually understand your situation. We have many albums, and solo projects. For me it is mostly a done deal. But the games we are doing are something to embellish it all. So I won't interfere with your work, David. But I'll nab you. When you least expect it as well.'
David caressed her arm and kissed it, and then, to repay her generous act, he got down likewise on his knees, lifted up her skirt, pulled down her knickers, and as she put her hands on his head which she liked to do, he flicked her clitoris with his tongue, and brought her to a happy and blissful orgasm.
'Oh, fuck. That was good,' she said.
'I live to serve,' he responded, and went off to have another shower.
* * * * *
For four months, though, he was busy. Always working. And he left her sexual frustrations to the private collection of sex toys hidden in her closet. Yet, as time passed, she craved intimacy. She needed some. So she kept it very simple. Time to impress him.
He was at work, designing new screens of action in his current project, when Melanie walked in, dressed in a short green skirt and green bikini top, with her hair tied up in a bob on top. God, she looked hot.
She came into his work cubicle, sat down on the lounge chair for guests, and when he looked at her, he noticed her legs were spread = and she had no knickers on.
'Uh, Melanie. Your a bit of a distraction, don't you think?'
'Oh, just ignore me,' she replied.
But try as he might, the growing bulge in his crotch wouldn't be ignored and eventually, out ofsheer frustration he said, 'Ok. You win. I give up.'
'Whatever do you mean?' she asked him.
But he grabbed her hand, walked her to his Porsche, and as they drove home, Melanie sat there, smiling softly to herself. She had nabbed him.
* * * * *
He was top of her, and had taken her, so far, from every angle under the sun, but his manhood was between her breasts, and as he finished his work and exploded on to her face, she took a little onto her finger tip, sucked it and said, 'Thank you very much.'
And all night long she got what she was after, and her libido was worked to the utmost.
She would enjoy him now, take him places, and however long it lasted, well, such was life. But for now she would enjoy bedding David Rothchild, and leave the future to its own concerns, and enjoy the simple love of the day. And, oh, the sex was good. Boy was it good.
The End
Life With David
They did the scene. Nightclubs, though he didn't like to dance much, restaurants, circuses, musicals, movies and fares. They went everywhere together, and David was a lot of fun. He usually paid as well, even though Melaniel was a liberated enough kind of gal. He would toast her, buy her flowers, buy her chocolates and leave little gifts all over the apartment. She would find them, and the love notes, and smile at his poetic wit, and show the notes to the other Spiceies. They always laughed, and Geri admitted more than once being a little jealous. Melaniel was having the time of her life. Paul - Yomiel - rarely showed his face, but was duly jealous, yet claimed he didn't mind. Good luck for his twin. She deserved her happiness.
And then came the first child. A boy. Dylan Thomas Rothchild. Dylan was smart as well, yet only average looking. At 21 he finally ventured off as his birth visa for Hull expired at 30, and he would have to go off to the edge of Majesty, as all newborn children in the centre likewise had to do, and find a place to live. Such were the realities of an evergrowing population.
Kirsten Janine Rothchild came a bit later, and she was a stunner in her teens. David doted on her, and she found modelling work with an agency in Bryforthmarchington, a newish city up the northern edge of the realm.
And then it was just the two of them again, as it had been to start with. They were good days. Happy days. And, later on in life, Melaniel looked back fondly and reminded herself that life with David Rothchild was always a life of happiness, and when she was available, and if he was ever available, to try things on again for a surefire good time.
So, the days passed, and they usually stayed in Melanie's apartment in Hull, and the team completed the first 7 adventures in the 'U.K. State of Mind' video game series. They were indeed good times, happy times, but like all things, they eventually come to an end.
The End
When It's Over
David looked out onto the ocean. An ocean - again. Somehow, in his life, endings were made with oceans. It just seemed that way. Melaniel was inside, on the bed, reading an issue of Vogue. They had been together for 70 years now, but it was finished. He would tell her now. It was over.
'Sweetie. Do you remember, when we got together, how I said to you that there were others in my life.'
'Sure,' responded Melaniel, not looking up.
'Well. You know. Its time.'
She looked up at him. 'Oh. Its over, then?'
'Uh. Well. Well, yeh. Time to call it a day. It's been great, but time for me to go back to Justine. I mailed her the other day and she rang me this morning. Time for quits.'
'When it's over, David Rothchild, a woman knows when to call it quits. We are the sensitive sex, after all. So I won't push you and I will leave quietly. You like this place more than I, and there is nothing too personal here. I will go - well - now. I have a backpack, and I'll put a few things in.'
'Ok,' he responded.
Half an hour later she was at the front door, a black backpack on her shoulder. 'You know, David. If you like me, later on. In eternity. If you like me.'
'I. I think I will, in time, inevitably call in that favour, Melanie Janine Mandela Brown. I think I will.'
'Then farewell, David Rothchild. Farewell.'
And Melaniel, child of Destiny, was off, into the night of Hull, downtown, to another place for a temporary stay, but soon off, back off to the big wide world, and the beginning of a new adventure, a new dream, a new infinite plan of Glory for the life of Scary Spice. And our story is complete, and our story is over, and this portion of the Infinite Realm of Majesty is finished. Alleluia, Amen and Amen.
The End
Chronicles of the
>
> Infinite Realm of Majesty
>
>
>
> Stuck in Hull
>
>
>
> by
>
> Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly
>
> Copyright 6177 SC
>
>
>
> Melaniel watched the fly climb slowly up the wall. It poked around for a bit and then took off again, and shortly disappeared out the window. She looked out after it and then returned her gaze to the wall. There WERE posters on it,at least. There WAS something to look at. But bugger all else. She sat there,bored. Finally she turned to the one way glass mirror on the opposite wall which she couldn't see through. 'I hope you are enjoying this,' she said out loud. 'It sure bores the fuck out of me,' she said under her breath.'
>
> A voice came over an intercom. 'Remember, Melanie. We're not here. For the exercise you have to think you are alone.'
>
> 'Yeh, right. Whatever,' she said.
>
>
>
> She looked around the room, and finally noticed the little box under the other lounge seat.
>
> 'She's noticed it,' a voice said in the control room.
>
> 'Get cameras on her face. We don't want to miss anything,' said the other.
>
>
>
> As the hidden ones watched, Melanie B got down on her knees, retrieved the tin box and looked at it. There was a lock on it. A combination lock of 3 digits.
>
> 'For fuck's sake,' she said swearing, but starting at 000 she worked through her numbers only to screech 'Bastards' as the number 986 finally undid the lock.
>
> She glared at the one way mirror. Inside David almost smiled.
>
> 'She's cute when she's angry,' said Daniel.
>
> David nodded in agreement.
>
>
>
> The box open she found the note. 376 x 123,489 - 456,722 =
>
>
>
> She glared at the mirror again. She hated maths questions.
>
>
>
> But as she worked it out slowly she came to 45,975,142, and typed that into the pad against the locked door. She hit the accept button and, watching nervously, the door bolted open.
>
> 'Alleluia,' she said. 'At fucking last.' She walked through and the door quickly closed behind her. In the new room, much the same again, but a toilet in a small cubicle with a shower and soap, and a tiny kitchenette with a fridge. She quickly looked inside. 17 Mars bars, a pint of fresh milk, and one egg and lettuce sandwich. She poured herself a glass of water and sat down eating the sandwich. Then she looked at the bookcase and noted the various items and looked at the small mattress on the floor. There was a light sheet and one pillow. But it was warm enough inside, so she would be fine. And then she looked at the other door and noticed the same electronic lock, and started figuring this was probably how the rest of the challenge would go. And, of course, Daniel and David would be behind the mirror in this room also.
>
> 'How many rooms?' she asked the mirror, munching on her sandwich.
>
>
>
> 'We can't really tell her that,' said Daniel to David.
>
> 'But we don't want to piss her off. It doesn't have to be 100% lifelike. Its only research for a videogame in the end. We can give her a break,' said David.
>
> 'Fine. Ok,' said Daniel.
>
> David's voice came over the intercom. 'There are12. But we shouldn't have told you that.'
>
> 'Right,' said Melanie to herself, and summed up the challenge. 12 rooms, probably all the same size, and an increasing challenge to crack the number code each time. Still, for the sake of 'UK state of mind', someone had to do it.
>
>
>
> * * * * *
>
>
>
> Room 5. Melanie was stumped. It had taken two days to work out room two, a whole week for room three, and 17 days for room four. She had been in room 5 for a full month and no solution, and her supplies in this room were starting to run low. And the sign on the wall reading 'It's obvious' was really starting to piss her off. She had insulted the mirror more than once because of it.
>
> Finally she caved. She looked into the mirror and asked, 'What is so obvious, then?'
>
> The intercom came on and a voice said, 'That you're stupid.'
>
> She glared at the mirror, but kept her tongue for once.
>
> 'That wasn't very nice, Daniel,' said David in the control room.
>
> 'She's thick as a brick. This is one of the easier ones.'
>
> 'She just hasn't worked it out yet,' said David. He spoke into the intercom. 'It's a lot easier than you think, Mel. Keep this one simple.'
>
> 'Easy for you to say,' said Melanie, and hooked into a Mars bar.
>
>
>
> She sat on the couch, looking around the room. 'What is so obvious then?' she asked herself. Three bookcases, no clues on any book pages. A desk with their notes. A computer with Microsoft on it but one file which reads 'try again'. And an assortment of knick knacks. But no bloody clues. I mean, why is room number five so obvious?' she asked herself.
>
> A thought suddenly struck her. Obvious about room 5. No it couldn't be that simple.
>
> She stood, walked to the number panel, shrugged, typed in the number 5 and hit the button. And the door jolted open. She smiled, but before she left the room she walked over to the mirror, said, 'bastards,' and went on to the next challenge.
>
> 'She's worked it out at last!' exclaimed Daniel.
>
> 'See, she's not that stupid,' responded David smiling.
>
> 'We'll see,' said Daniel. 'Let's see if she can work out room six.'
>
> 'Yes, let's,' said David, as they slid their seats down the control desk to the next room's viewing mirror.
>
>
>
> * * * * *
>
>
>
> 'Room nine and doing fine,' she said to herself. 5 months of crypticity and intense logic and Melanie Janine Mandela Brown was a new woman. But how long she would be stuck in Hull in this conundrum of a maze yet she did not know. Still, she was stronger and harder for the experience so far and would not quit. No way would she ever, now, press the big red 'Escape' button on each room's wall. No way.
>
>
>
> 'Are you enjoying yourself?' asked a voice over the intercom. 'You don't look like you have bothered with anything yet?'
>
> Melanie ignored the voice and continued watching 'Spiceworld 7' on the DVD player. All 25 were on the rack.
>
> 'I'll get to it,' she finally replied.
>
>
>
> In the control room, David turned to Daniel. 'You think she really will watch all 25 of them?'
>
> 'Instinctive, I'd say. She must know.'
>
>
>
> A few days later, putting in the final disc and settling down for the girls ultimate adventure, the disc simply failed to show any screen. She cleaned the disc, but nothing.
>
> 'Bastards,' she yelled at the mirror. Daniel and David were used to that. And then she looked more carefully at what she thought was the clock on the top left of the screen, and noticed it was in fact just a number. She read it to herself, typed it into the keypad, pressed the button, and the door yet again jolted open. She went to the mirror, smiled, shook her head and was just about to speak when Daniel's voice came over the intercom, saying, 'Don't say it. We know. Bastards.'
>
> 'Exactly,' said Melanie B, and hopped off to room nine.
>
>
>
> 'She might even make it,' said David.
>
> 'Room 12 will get her. She is only a Spice Girl,' said Daniel.
>
> 'You really are a bastard, aren't you,' said David.
>
> 'Exactly,' responded Daniel, grinning madly.
>
>
>
> * * * * *
>
>
>
> 1 year nearly up, and she didn't have much time left, for that was the maximun duration of the challenge. And as she finally exited room 11 in triumph, she looked at the clock. 2 hours to midnight. The last day.
>
> 'You haven't a hope,' said Daniel over the intercom.'
>
> The room was full of thousands of books, and a few other minor items. She took a coke from the new fridge, collapsed on the bed and gazed at the room. It had been a valiant effort, but she couldn't possibly hope to win now. They had bested her. She laid there, almost sobbing. All that work. All that struggle. To fall just short, after all that effort. Life really was ironic. Thanks Alanis Morrisette. She looked up at the ceiling, cried out 'give me a break,' and turned over sobbing.
>
>
>
> Nearly two hours later she was quiet. Humbled. She had come so far, only to fall just short. How bloody ironic. She looked at the clock. 10 minutes to go. She would have to put on a brave face.
>
>
>
> She sat up, looked around the room one last time, and then gave up, sitting their glumly. What else could she do.
>
>
>
> And then, a quiet little voice, whispered into the back of her mind, 'Try the scroll.' Another voice responded to the first one, though, and said, 'Don't bloody tell her, ok. Cheat.'
>
> Reluctantly Melanie got to her feet, retrieved the one and only scroll from the bookcase, and unrolling it read, 'Beginning of beginnings, the start of an endless journey. The answer you seek is on the first day you were born.'
>
>
>
> Melanie cogitated.
>
>
>
> 'Try your birthdate, dimwit,' a voice said over the intercom.
>
> She got up quickly, punched in her birthdate and started hearing the chimes from the grandfather clock start chiming to 12.
>
> 'Shit,' she said, as she had entered the wrong date.
>
> 'Come on Melanie. You can do this,' she said, calming herself down. And as she correctly entered her birthdate and hit the button, the door jolted open and she burst through just before the 12th chime.
>
>
>
> All of a sudden a huge bang and rushing into the room came Geri, Melanie C, Victoria and Emma and many other familiar faces, all crashing into her, clapping her and patting her on the back. And 'Wannabe' started playing, and party food was brought out.
>
>
>
> And, finally, Daniel and David appeared, and David smiled at her, 'Brilliant, Melanie Brown,' he said, and she hugged him. But Daniel looked at her and said, 'You just got lucky, kid.'
>
> Melanie stared at her adversary, took David by the arm and flirted back to Daniel, saying, 'Unlike YOU tonight, KID!'
>
> And she laughed madly, escaping away with her night's lover, leaving a mad Daniel grinning and shaking his head, saying, 'Bastard.'
>
>
>
> And then Geri grabbed him, gave him a kiss, and said 'Come on lover. I'll give you a break,' and the following year UK State of Mind was a smash hit all summer long.
>
>
>
> The End
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> http://noahidebooks.angelfire.com
Message has been deleted
Murff
Jun 3, 2013, 8:07:33 PM6/3/13
to
On Mon, 03 Jun 2013 16:26:11 -0700, Daniel Daly wrote:
> Scientists have done studies...
I've only just gotten round to having a look at this thread. It wasn't
really worth the effort. Your pride really is very bruised. You are
currently in the middle of the transition between "denial" and "thrash-
about-angrily" phases.
But you're still unoriginal and uninspiring. It has all be said and done
before, many times. What is happening is that you're being faced with the
difference between your own notion of your worth, and others' opinions of
the same.
A *good* writer once put it rather memorably: "O would some power the
gift tae gie us to see ourselves as others see us."
--
Murff...
> Scientists have done studies...
I've only just gotten round to having a look at this thread. It wasn't
really worth the effort. Your pride really is very bruised. You are
currently in the middle of the transition between "denial" and "thrash-
about-angrily" phases.
But you're still unoriginal and uninspiring. It has all be said and done
before, many times. What is happening is that you're being faced with the
difference between your own notion of your worth, and others' opinions of
the same.
A *good* writer once put it rather memorably: "O would some power the
gift tae gie us to see ourselves as others see us."
--
Murff...
Message has been deleted
Daniel Daly
Jun 4, 2013, 1:04:39 AM6/4/13
to
> Hmmm...
>
>
>
> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
>
> --
>
> Mr O
YOU THINK I DIDN'T KNOW THAT? CRITICS WHO DON'T APPRECIATE QUALITY STORYTELLING, WHO COULDN'T WRITE 100 WORDS OF INTERESTING DIALOGUE TO SAVE THEMSELVES. MY COMMENTS WERE DIRECTED TOWARDS THOSE WHO HAD ALREADY SLEDGED ME FOR NO REASON - NOT TOWARDS ANYONE WHO HAD NOT YET COMMENTED. GOOD DAY AND GOOD BYE TO THIS SNOT-NOSED GROUP.
Message has been deleted
Richard Robinson
Jun 4, 2013, 9:16:51 AM6/4/13
to
Daniel Daly said:
>> Hmmm...
>>
>> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
>
>> Hmmm...
>>
>> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
>
> YOU THINK I DIDN'T KNOW THAT? CRITICS WHO DON'T APPRECIATE QUALITY STORYTELLING, WHO COULDN'T WRITE 100 WORDS OF INTERESTING DIALOGUE TO SAVE THEMSELVES. MY COMMENTS WERE DIRECTED TOWARDS THOSE WHO HAD ALREADY SLEDGED ME FOR NO REASON - NOT TOWARDS ANYONE WHO HAD NOT YET COMMENTED. GOOD DAY AND GOOD BYE TO THIS SNOT-NOSED GROUP.
'bye, then.
Steve Firth
Jun 4, 2013, 10:13:37 AM6/4/13
to
door arse no contact gone not missed
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Steve Firth
Jun 4, 2013, 10:13:38 AM6/4/13
to
Fuck off spamming cunt.
Showing your true colours as a compete and utter wanker, one notes.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Showing your true colours as a compete and utter wanker, one notes.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Steve Firth
Jun 4, 2013, 10:13:37 AM6/4/13
to
Mr On!on <on!o...@anon.invalid> wrote:
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
> Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
>
>> And then he had lifted his hand to the skies and sworn vengeance
>> upon Jaltar, and destruction of his assembly, the Jaltarians.
>
>
>> And then he had lifted his hand to the skies and sworn vengeance
>> upon Jaltar, and destruction of his assembly, the Jaltarians.
>
> Hmmm...
>
> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
Is being right up his own arse the wrong place?
>
> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Steve Firth
Jun 4, 2013, 10:13:39 AM6/4/13
to
There are two classes that habitually swear, working class and upper class.
All that not swearing says about someone is that they are one of the grey
middle men about whom no one who matters gives a flying fuck.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Murff
Jun 4, 2013, 11:04:45 AM6/4/13
to
On Mon, 03 Jun 2013 22:04:39 -0700, Daniel Daly wrote:
> GOOD DAY AND GOOD BYE TO THIS SNOT-NOSED GROUP.
Diddums.
> GOOD DAY AND GOOD BYE TO THIS SNOT-NOSED GROUP.
--
Murff...
Daniel Daly
Jun 4, 2013, 12:39:51 PM6/4/13
to
I have changed my mind and will stay in this group.
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Daniel Daly
Jun 4, 2013, 1:32:11 PM6/4/13
to
Heres a trick
a funny joke - perhaps
Heaven vs. Hell
One night, God visits a preacher.
The preacher has one question, "What is Heaven like?"
God replies, "Heaven is like a city. It has the best of everything. For example, the French are the chefs, the Italians are the lovers, the English are the policeman, the Germans are the mechanics, and the Dutch are the politicians."
"What is Hell like?" he asks.
"Well," he sighs, "the French are the mechanics, the Italians are the politicians, the English are the chefs, the Germans are the policemen, and the Dutch are the lovers."
a funny joke - perhaps
Heaven vs. Hell
One night, God visits a preacher.
The preacher has one question, "What is Heaven like?"
God replies, "Heaven is like a city. It has the best of everything. For example, the French are the chefs, the Italians are the lovers, the English are the policeman, the Germans are the mechanics, and the Dutch are the politicians."
"What is Hell like?" he asks.
"Well," he sighs, "the French are the mechanics, the Italians are the politicians, the English are the chefs, the Germans are the policemen, and the Dutch are the lovers."
Message has been deleted
Steve Firth
Jun 4, 2013, 1:48:17 PM6/4/13
to
Daniel Daly <danielthoma...@live.com.au> wrote:
> I have changed my mind and will stay in this group.
have you paid your membership fee?
> I have changed my mind and will stay in this group.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Steve Firth
Jun 4, 2013, 1:48:18 PM6/4/13
to
Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:
> Daniel Daly said:
>>> Hmmm...
>>>
>>> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
>>
>> YOU THINK I DIDN'T KNOW THAT? CRITICS WHO DON'T APPRECIATE QUALITY
>> STORYTELLING, WHO COULDN'T WRITE 100 WORDS OF INTERESTING DIALOGUE TO
>> SAVE THEMSELVES. MY COMMENTS WERE DIRECTED TOWARDS THOSE WHO HAD
>> ALREADY SLEDGED ME FOR NO REASON - NOT TOWARDS ANYONE WHO HAD NOT YET
>> COMMENTED. GOOD DAY AND GOOD BYE TO THIS SNOT-NOSED GROUP.
>
> 'bye, then.
gone, but not missed.
> Daniel Daly said:
>>> Hmmm...
>>>
>>> You're in the wrong place, Daniel Daly.
>>
>> YOU THINK I DIDN'T KNOW THAT? CRITICS WHO DON'T APPRECIATE QUALITY
>> STORYTELLING, WHO COULDN'T WRITE 100 WORDS OF INTERESTING DIALOGUE TO
>> SAVE THEMSELVES. MY COMMENTS WERE DIRECTED TOWARDS THOSE WHO HAD
>> ALREADY SLEDGED ME FOR NO REASON - NOT TOWARDS ANYONE WHO HAD NOT YET
>> COMMENTED. GOOD DAY AND GOOD BYE TO THIS SNOT-NOSED GROUP.
>
> 'bye, then.
--
<•DarWin><|
_/ _/
Richard Robinson
Jun 4, 2013, 4:58:54 PM6/4/13
to
Daniel Daly said:
> I have changed my mind and will stay in this group.
> I have changed my mind and will stay in this group.
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Message has been deleted
Richard Robinson
Jun 4, 2013, 9:32:19 PM6/4/13
to
Marc Wilson said:
> In uk.misc, (Steve Firth) wrote in
> It makes a huge (not Huge) difference *how* you swear. Yer basic
> Sun-reader uses expletives merely as noise-words, to provide thinking
> time as they try to claw their way through a coherent sentence. You can
> essentially ignore the words as they are essentially comma-substitutes.
>
> Someone who swears imaginatively and eloquently - well, that can be a
> word of art.
Fuck, yeah.
> In uk.misc, (Steve Firth) wrote in
> Sun-reader uses expletives merely as noise-words, to provide thinking
> time as they try to claw their way through a coherent sentence. You can
> essentially ignore the words as they are essentially comma-substitutes.
>
> Someone who swears imaginatively and eloquently - well, that can be a
> word of art.
Fuck, yeah.
Marcus Houlden
Jun 5, 2013, 7:41:56 PM6/5/13
to
On Wed, 05 Jun 2013 00:53:42 +0100, Marc Wilson <E-0C0013...@cleopatra.co.uk>
wrote the following to uk.misc:
> In uk.misc, (Steve Firth) wrote in
><275510827392047747.126003%steve%-mallo...@news.eternal-september.org>::
mh.
--
http://www.nukesoft.co.uk
http://www.houlden.org
wrote the following to uk.misc:
> In uk.misc, (Steve Firth) wrote in
> It makes a huge (not Huge) difference *how* you swear. Yer basic
> Sun-reader uses expletives merely as noise-words, to provide thinking
> time as they try to claw their way through a coherent sentence. You can
> essentially ignore the words as they are essentially comma-substitutes.
>
> Someone who swears imaginatively and eloquently - well, that can be a
> word of art.
Bollocks.
> Sun-reader uses expletives merely as noise-words, to provide thinking
> time as they try to claw their way through a coherent sentence. You can
> essentially ignore the words as they are essentially comma-substitutes.
>
> Someone who swears imaginatively and eloquently - well, that can be a
> word of art.
mh.
--
http://www.nukesoft.co.uk
http://www.houlden.org
Marcus Houlden
Jun 5, 2013, 7:55:16 PM6/5/13
to
On Tue, 4 Jun 2013 18:52:07 +0100, Sn!pe <sn...@spambin.fsnet.co.uk>
> What job do the Australians have?
Attempting to do a religious version of the Eye of Argon
(http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/~susan/sf/eyeargon/eyeargon.htm),
apparently.
wrote the following to uk.misc:
Attempting to do a religious version of the Eye of Argon
(http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/~susan/sf/eyeargon/eyeargon.htm),
apparently.
Message has been deleted
Fevric J. Glandules
Jun 6, 2013, 6:06:04 AM6/6/13
to
Marcus Houlden wrote:
> On Wed, 05 Jun 2013 00:53:42 +0100, Marc Wilson <E-0C0013...@cleopatra.co.uk>
> wrote the following to uk.misc:
>
>> In uk.misc, (Steve Firth) wrote in
>>
> On Wed, 05 Jun 2013 00:53:42 +0100, Marc Wilson <E-0C0013...@cleopatra.co.uk>
> wrote the following to uk.misc:
>
>> In uk.misc, (Steve Firth) wrote in
>>
>> It makes a huge (not Huge) difference *how* you swear. Yer basic
>> Sun-reader uses expletives merely as noise-words, to provide thinking
>> time as they try to claw their way through a coherent sentence. You can
>> essentially ignore the words as they are essentially comma-substitutes.
>>
>> Someone who swears imaginatively and eloquently - well, that can be a
>> word of art.
>
> Bollocks.
The fuck.
>> Sun-reader uses expletives merely as noise-words, to provide thinking
>> time as they try to claw their way through a coherent sentence. You can
>> essentially ignore the words as they are essentially comma-substitutes.
>>
>> Someone who swears imaginatively and eloquently - well, that can be a
>> word of art.
>
> Bollocks.
(Fbzrbar unq gb fnl vg!)
Steve Terry
Jun 7, 2013, 9:29:29 PM6/7/13
to
Daniel Daly wrote:
> Heres a trick
>
> a funny joke - perhaps
>
> Heres a trick
>
> a funny joke - perhaps
>
> "What is Hell like?" he asks.
>
>
> and the Dutch are the lovers.
>
That's unfair on Dutch girls
>
Steve Terry
--
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