Jesus will not return

[David Dalton]

Jesus will not return.

Instead, I, the next figure similar to Jesus, will
instigate a transition to a new age that will be
heaven on Earth, not just for Christians (there
are many paths, including moral atheism, up a
spiritual mountain).

I present some arguments for why I am the next
figure similar to Jesus on my Salmon on the Thorns
web page http://www.nfld.com/~dalton/dtales.html .
If you have some constructive criticism follow
up here or e-mail me.

I have an individual religion but I am not
recruiting any followers. On that web page
I am not pushing my eleven main deities but
rather some messages not tied to any religion.

--
David Dalton dal...@nfld.com http://www.nfld.com/~dalton (home page)
http://www.nfld.com/~dalton/nf.html Newfoundland&Labrador Travel & Music
http://www.nfld.com/~dalton/dtales.html Salmon on the Thorns (mystic page)
"Here I go again...back into the flame" (Sarah McLachlan)

[Olrik]

Salmon with Lemon, Capers, and Rosemary


Prep Time:
20 min

Cook Time:
10 min

Level:
Easy

Serves:
4 servings

Ingredients

4 (6-ounce) salmon fillets
1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 tablespoon minced fresh rosemary leaves
8 lemon slices (about 2 lemons)
1/4 cup lemon juice (about 1 lemon)
1/2 cup Marsala wine (or white wine)
4 teaspoons capers
4 pieces of aluminum foil

Directions

Brush top and bottom of salmon fillets with olive oil and season with
salt, pepper, and rosemary. Place each piece of seasoned salmon on a
piece of foil large enough to fold over and seal. Top the each piece of
salmon with 2 lemon slices, 1 tablespoon of lemon juice, 2 tablespoons
of wine, and 1 teaspoon of capers. Wrap up salmon tightly in the foil
packets.

Place a grill pan over medium-high heat or preheat a gas or charcoal
grill. Place the foil packets on the hot grill and cook for 10 minutes
for a 1-inch thick piece of salmon. Serve in the foil packets.

SERVES: 4 new age freaks; Calories: 377; Total Fat: 25 grams; Saturated
Fat: 4 grams; Protein: 34 grams; Total carbohydrates: 2 grams; Sugar: 1
grams Fiber: 0 grams; Cholesterol: 94 milligrams; Sodium: 451 milligrams

[SkyEyes]

I don't especially like salmon, but even so, this sounds good, Olrik.

Brenda Nelson, A.A.#34
BAAWA Knight of the Golden Litterbox
EAC Professor of Feline Thermometrics and Cat-Herding
skyeyes nine at cox dot net OR
skyeyes nine at yahoo dot com

[Olrik]

Substitute salmon with trout, or any «fat» fish you like.

[Yap]

Are you trying to teach cooking or are you preparing a salmon meal for
us?

But your cholesterol and sodium are quite high, not a good thing.

[Father Haskell]

On Aug 24, 1:43 am, Olrik <olrik...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> Le 2012-08-24 01:37, SkyEyes a crit :

Beats Hell out of any fish recipe jesus fed to his disciples.

[Olrik]

Le 2012-08-24 03:19, Yap a �crit :

Actually the numbers for that meal are more than acceptable, providing
you don't eat like a pig for your other meals!

[Uncle Vic]

David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote in news:dalton-A75828.00413124082012
@news.eternal-september.org:

> Jesus will not return.
>
> Instead, I, the next figure similar to Jesus, will
> instigate a transition to a new age that will be
> heaven on Earth, not just for Christians (there
> are many paths, including moral atheism, up a
> spiritual mountain).

I have to admit I haven't seen this twist before...

--
Uncle Vic
aa# 2011
The meaning of life is to find your gift.
The purpose of life is to give it away.

Visit my You Tube Channel!
http://www.youtube.com/user/Vicman6311?feature=mhee

[David Dalton]

In article <k16u9e$ivn$1...@dont-email.me>, Olrik <olri...@yahoo.com>
wrote:

Sounds good, I'll save it for the future, but I am the
only new age freak around so I'll have to share it
with Christians for now.

[David Dalton]

In article <XnsA0B9AF727D8...@216.196.97.131>,

Uncle Vic <so...@noway.com> wrote:

> David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote in news:dalton-A75828.00413124082012
> @news.eternal-september.org:
>
> > Jesus will not return.
> >
> > Instead, I, the next figure similar to Jesus, will
> > instigate a transition to a new age that will be
> > heaven on Earth, not just for Christians (there
> > are many paths, including moral atheism, up a
> > spiritual mountain).
>
> I have to admit I haven't seen this twist before...

I was raised Catholic, was a scientific atheist for
a long while, but now have an individual religion.

But how am I going to instigate a transition to a new
age? Not long ago I was trying to do it magickally
with the supposed help of my eleven main deities,
but at least for now I have given up on that.

Instead I hope to demonstrate my similarity to a
large number of past religious figures (including
in major religions and paganism and native and
African religions) and thus to demonstrate that
they are all similar to one another.

Armed with that and with whatever clout my own
similarity might give me, I would push for a
global spiritual summit (including representatives
of atheists) that might help lead to an end
to war and to us dealing with famine and disease
in the third world.

All that I discuss on my Salmon on the Thorns
web page but I should really spend some time
soon to edit the writing since it is a bit
rambly. I also need to spend more time on
web and library research to prove more similarities.

Thanks for the feedback. I was going to read
alt.atheism but the volume of posts is a bit
much so I am reading talk.philosophy.humanism
and talk.religion.newage so I guess I am missing
any followups for which the author restricted
the Newsgroups line to alt.atheism .

[Ben Kaufman]

On Fri, 24 Aug 2012 00:41:31 -0230, David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:

>Jesus will not return.

One has to have existed in order to return.

[David Dalton]

In article <lneg38hg270t4o2lo...@4ax.com>,

Yes, there is the argument that Jesus was a fictional
character, a composite based on earlier figures.
But I believe he existed but not that he was resurrected
and not that he was some God incarnate.

I say on my web page that Jesus and Taliesin (Gwion Bach)
are the two figures I have the most evidence for my being
similar to. But I also have some evidence for Moses,
Jacob, Rama, Krishna, Buddha, Quetzalcoatl, Iowa Dakota
Salmon youth, Adonis, Amergin, Fionn, Myrddin, The Turquoise
Bee, and a few more so far even though I have done very
little library research after 1997 (I expected readers
would come forward with more data but none have).

[David Dalton]

In article <dalton-697537....@news.eternal-september.org>,

David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:

> In article <lneg38hg270t4o2lo...@4ax.com>,
> Ben Kaufman <spaXm-mXe-anXd-p...@pobox.com> wrote:
>
> > On Fri, 24 Aug 2012 00:41:31 -0230, David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:
> >
> > >Jesus will not return.
> >
> > One has to have existed in order to return.
>
> Yes, there is the argument that Jesus was a fictional
> character, a composite based on earlier figures.
> But I believe he existed but not that he was resurrected
> and not that he was some God incarnate.
>
> I say on my web page that Jesus and Taliesin (Gwion Bach)
> are the two figures I have the most evidence for my being
> similar to. But I also have some evidence for Moses,
> Jacob, Rama, Krishna, Buddha, Quetzalcoatl, Iowa Dakota
> Salmon youth, Adonis, Amergin, Fionn, Myrddin, The Turquoise
> Bee, and a few more so far even though I have done very
> little library research after 1997 (I expected readers
> would come forward with more data but none have).

I expected that readers in small religions (including
pagan and native and African religions) would come
forward with more parallels information but they have
not yet. I thought they would since such parallels
information would prove that their major figures
were just as good as and similar to figures such
as Krishna, Moses, Buddha, and Jesus (I'm not sure
about Mohammed yet). But perhaps they do not want
to support me, and perhaps they are waiting for me
to come out of the low years.

But I estimate that there may have been up to 1000
such figures in the last 5000 years (or since and
including Krishna.

If this is true it is to the advantage of atheists
to help me with my research, since it could prove
that Jesus and the other major figures were just
some of many mystic bipolars with certain solar
and lunar cycle characteristics that should be
able to be explained scientifically. And towards
that goal, I offer myself as a living specimen,
obviously not a living god, and willing to undergo
tests such as FMRIs even now and when I come out
of the low years.

The low years began on Jan. 29, 1996, and have
been characterized by low creativity, delusions,
and occasional low mood. The delusions have been
minimized by my being on lithium and olanzapine
and avoiding alcohol 1--9 days before full moon
(due to earlier problems during waxing gibbous moon).
For most past figures the low years have lasted
seven years but I have gone over 16.55 years so
far, so long I think since my suffering has been
reduced by the meds.

But anyway, I propose a partnership between myself
and any interested atheists.

[Samuel Harrigon]

David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:
>
> Thanks for the feedback. I was going to read
> alt.atheism but the volume of posts is a bit
> much so I am reading talk.philosophy.humanism
> and talk.religion.newage so I guess I am missing
> any followups for which the author restricted
> the Newsgroups line to alt.atheism .
>

If the universe is really completely self-contained, having no boundary
or edge, it would have neither beginning nor end: it would simply be.
What place then, for a creator?

[TibetanMonkey, the Beach Cruiser Philosopher]

I still believe that Jesus got lost in the Universe. And if he comes
back, he comes in a UFO.


-----------------------------------------------------

http://webspawner.com/users/BANANAREVOLUTION

[linuxgal]

I'm sure he existed, but the thing is, death is **defined** as the
irreversible cessation of life. So if Jesus reversed it, then he didn't
die, by definition. And the afterlife doesn't work either, in the same
way you can't divide by zero.

--
If the gun grabbin' Captain Planet watchin' NPR listenin' UTNE Reader
readin' red diaper doper baby union thug shoe fits, wear it!

[Ben Kaufman]

On Sat, 25 Aug 2012 00:23:19 -0230, David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:

>In article <lneg38hg270t4o2lo...@4ax.com>,
> Ben Kaufman <spaXm-mXe-anXd-p...@pobox.com> wrote:
>
>> On Fri, 24 Aug 2012 00:41:31 -0230, David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:
>>
>> >Jesus will not return.
>>
>> One has to have existed in order to return.
>
>Yes, there is the argument that Jesus was a fictional
>character, a composite based on earlier figures.
>But I believe he existed but not that he was resurrected
>and not that he was some God incarnate.

I think that if he actually existed there would have been some contemporary
historical recording of him. The fact that it's several decades after his death
that "Jesus" is first written about really indicates a fictitious character.

>
>I say on my web page that Jesus and Taliesin (Gwion Bach)
>are the two figures I have the most evidence for my being
>similar to. But I also have some evidence for Moses,
>Jacob, Rama, Krishna, Buddha, Quetzalcoatl, Iowa Dakota
>Salmon youth, Adonis, Amergin, Fionn, Myrddin, The Turquoise
>Bee, and a few more so far even though I have done very
>little library research after 1997 (I expected readers
>would come forward with more data but none have).

There is no question that Moses is purely fiction. The Exodus story was created
to give a heritage to "expatriates" of Egypt who lever by mundane means over
time, who eventually referred to themselves as the Hebrews.

[Ben Kaufman]

On Sat, 25 Aug 2012 06:19:55 -0700, linuxgal <linu...@cleanposts.com> wrote:

>Ben Kaufman wrote:
>> On Fri, 24 Aug 2012 00:41:31 -0230, David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:
>>
>>> Jesus will not return.
>>
>> One has to have existed in order to return.
>
>I'm sure he existed, but the thing is, death is **defined** as the
>irreversible cessation of life. So if Jesus reversed it, then he didn't
>die, by definition. And the afterlife doesn't work either, in the same
>way you can't divide by zero.

Why are you sure that he existed?

[Samuel Harrigon]

Ben Kaufman <spaXm-mXe-anXd-p...@pobox.com> wrote:
> >Salmon youth, Adonis, Amergin, Fionn, Myrddin, The Turquoise
> >Bee, and a few more so far even though I have done very
> >little library research after 1997 (I expected readers
> >would come forward with more data but none have).
>
> There is no question that Moses is purely fiction. The Exodus story was created
> to give a heritage to "expatriates" of Egypt who lever by mundane means over
> time, who eventually referred to themselves as the Hebrews.

Every religion, from earliest times, has hated and condemned those who
could not believe whatever it was that those old religions happened to
believe. Throughout the ages there have been the 'intellectual outlaws'
who have questioned the "unquestionable," and doubted even the very
existence of the gods. And those individual thinkers have been hated,
hunted, persecuted, and murdered by the religious believers. Yet the
Atheists and doubters are very much with us today, but those old
religions, and the gods they created, have long since ceased to trouble
the thoughts of mankind.

If Atheism is considered to be a religion, then it is easily the oldest
living religion in the world. Properly stated, Atheism is truly "that
old time religion" that the Baptists keep singing about.

Atheism is a difficult subject only because of the slander and
misrepresentations preached and published against it. Even the
information that is available in our most trusted and respected
reference books is the distorted and prejudiced view presented by
religion. Just as in Communist countries, where the articles on
Capitalism, democracy, politics, etc., are always written by Communists
and from the Communist point of view, so in Christian dominated
societies, such as the United States, all articles on Atheism,
Rationalism, Freethought, etc., that are to be found in encyclopedias
and other reference books, are written by theologians, and from the
Christian point of view.

[linuxgal]

The Way of the Nazorene was a sudden transformation of Judaism into a
proselytizing version. Those sorts of things come to us from
individuals, not multi-generational committees, such as some scholars
suspect Master Lao really was.

--
If the gun grabbin' Captain Planet watchin' NPR listenin' UTNE Reader

readin' red diaper doper baby union thug jackboot fits, wear it!

[Uncle Vic]

David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote in

news:dalton-E3FFF7....@news.eternal-september.org:

>> David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote in
>> news:dalton-A75828.00413124082012 @news.eternal-september.org:
>>
>> > Jesus will not return.
>> >
>> > Instead, I, the next figure similar to Jesus, will
>> > instigate a transition to a new age that will be
>> > heaven on Earth, not just for Christians (there
>> > are many paths, including moral atheism, up a
>> > spiritual mountain).
>>
>> I have to admit I haven't seen this twist before...
>
> I was raised Catholic, was a scientific atheist for
> a long while, but now have an individual religion.

Why?

[sbalneav]

In alt.atheism David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:
> Jesus will not return.

"Return", of course, implies he was here in the first place. Got any evidence
he was?

--
__ _ | Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
(_ |_) | Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
__)|_) | -- Groucho Marx

[Ben Kaufman]

On Sat, 25 Aug 2012 11:25:16 -0700, linuxgal <linu...@cleanposts.com> wrote:

>Ben Kaufman wrote:
>> On Sat, 25 Aug 2012 06:19:55 -0700, linuxgal <linu...@cleanposts.com> wrote:
>>
>>> Ben Kaufman wrote:
>>>> On Fri, 24 Aug 2012 00:41:31 -0230, David Dalton <dal...@nfld.com> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> Jesus will not return.
>>>> One has to have existed in order to return.
>>> I'm sure he existed, but the thing is, death is **defined** as the
>>> irreversible cessation of life. So if Jesus reversed it, then he didn't
>>> die, by definition. And the afterlife doesn't work either, in the same
>>> way you can't divide by zero.
>>
>> Why are you sure that he existed?
>
>The Way of the Nazorene was a sudden transformation of Judaism into a
>proselytizing version. Those sorts of things come to us from
>individuals, not multi-generational committees, such as some scholars
>suspect Master Lao really was.

But it wasn't sudden. The first writings about Jesus occurred decades after his
alleged death.

[David Dalton]

In article <499f386...@swing.com>,

My top-ranked deity is ALL which creates within itself.
I postulate that the universe (spacetime and its contents)
is a subset of ALL but I don't know that for sure, perhaps
the universe is ALL.

[David Dalton]

In article <dalton-FF6878....@news.eternal-september.org>,

Perhaps I should have proposed a secular alliance
rather than an un-holy alliance. And such a
secular alliance could include interested members
of religions as well as atheists, since I am not
pushing my individual religion.

A while ago I asked my top-ranked deity ALL if it
was OK for me (or anyone else) to have no deities.
I then divined by perineum click divination that
the answer is yes. (Similarly I once asked ALL
if it was OK for me to have lower-ranked deities
and again the answer was yes.)

Regarding the existence or non-existence of Jesus.
Perhaps he is a fictional character but if he is
then elements of his biographical date were taken
from earlier actual characters who were similar to
me. And on the subsubpage
http://www.nfld.com/~dalton/christian.html I
argue that the story of Jesus's baptism (which I
say was his anointing) is similar to my sun stare
experience of Sept. 5, 1991.

I was away from the net for 3 days and am just now
catching up.

[linuxgal]

Ben Kaufman wrote:
>
> But it wasn't sudden. The first writings about Jesus occurred decades after his
> alleged death.

Because Jesus boofed it when it came to his own belief that the Day of
the LORD would be within the lifetime of some of his own followers.
Only when a generation had passed away did people start collecting
scriptures.

--
Need a spiritual home? Consider joining us at Mary Queen of the Universe
Latter-day Buddhislamic Free Will Christian UFO Synagogue of Vishnu

http://www.cleanposts.com

[Ben Kaufman]

On Mon, 27 Aug 2012 20:58:30 -0700, linuxgal <linu...@cleanposts.com> wrote:

>Ben Kaufman wrote:
>>
>> But it wasn't sudden. The first writings about Jesus occurred decades after his
>> alleged death.
>
>Because Jesus boofed it when it came to his own belief that the Day of
>the LORD would be within the lifetime of some of his own followers.
>Only when a generation had passed away did people start collecting
>scriptures.

It seems to me, you see a man cure the blind, walk on water, rise from the dead,
you don't wait 60 years to write about it, oh wait, no, you can't write about it
because you're dead. This is clearly the work of a story teller.

[Fred]

linuxgal <linu...@cleanposts.com> wrote:
>Ben Kaufman wrote:
>> But it wasn't sudden. The first writings about Jesus occurred decades after his
>> alleged death.
>Because Jesus boofed it when it came to his own belief that the Day of
>the LORD would be within the lifetime of some of his own followers.
>Only when a generation had passed away did people start collecting
>scriptures.

Which is amusing because he was a believer in the Mithratic rites
and thought he *would* return. :)

---
"Fred" is my Christian name.
FOX "News," keeping rightards infromed since 1996