Face to face with a secularist
Logos
It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
on top then they can mark it up 400%.
As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter. His
hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
a triple grande mocha chai with steam. The way he deftly manouvered from
one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him in
the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
a pang of profound despair.
He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you mean.
I just snickered at him and walked off. Demolishing him would have been too
easy.
Brett Aubrey
news:e6qdncwaTewWsj_e...@adelphia.com...
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
>
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee
places.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
>
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
> well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of
the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
> eco-friendly,
Oh my G_d! Not eco-friendly (Gasp!!).
<snip unread>
unrestra...@hotmail.com
So, you could tell all that by looking at him? A well dressed man with
an overpriced coffee, and you read the other stuff in him? Then claim
you stood face to face and babbled accusations of Satanism and material
secularistic communism and GunderscoreD knows what-all? You even "knew"
the perversions of his family?
I'm guessing that you saw this fella while waiting for the bus at the
mall. You then spent the next several hours fantasizing about his
perversions and hateful political beliefs, daydreamed about your
"demolishing" him, then typed it up and sent this post off. Only four
hours or so of your life spent wallowing in this pathetic fantasy. How
close am I?
Kermit
Thurisaz the Einherjer
--
Romans 2:24 revised:
"For the name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles through you
cretinists, as it is written on aig."
Beagle
Logos wrote:
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again.
As a rude, irrational nutjob would. People like you make modern urban
life that little bit worse for normal people, Nashie. Assuming, of
course, that any of this is remotely true.
But if you're going to make these little sketches up, why not be a bit
more entertaining? You know, returning a dead parrot to a 'boutique'
and claiming it couldn't possibly evolved from bleedin' dinosaurs...
A.Carlson
>I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
>It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
>
>I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
>which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
>You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
>Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
>on top then they can mark it up 400%.
Blatantly obvious lie number 1! I'm not much for 'pretentious'
coffee, but I don't doubt for a minute that you can't pass a 'plain
old cup of coffee' as such and stay in business, particularly a
business that specializes in coffee! (I'm from Seattle, I should
know!)
>As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
>well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
>coiffure.
Sounds more like your typical televangelist!
>The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
>perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him.
Still sounds like a televangelist! They sure don't tolerate any other
religious competition on their own turf.
>The hedonistic
>way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
>eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
>his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter. His
>hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
>he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
>a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
That's what you call a 'plain old cup of coffee'?!?!?!?!?
>The way he deftly manouvered from
>one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him in
>the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
My my, aren't we being judgmental? Doesn't your holly babble say
something about that?
>So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way.
How arrogant can you get? Do you really think the world evolves
around you and your religion? I figure you probably think it should!
>At first he thought I was
>trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again.
So, explain now how this isn't harassment?
>He
>looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
>his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
>for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
>a pang of profound despair.
And he confirmed this how?
>He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you mean.
>I just snickered at him and walked off. Demolishing him would have been too
>easy.
Yes, as easy as writing clear and concise story lines that don't come
off as being extremely patronizing twisted rants of a religious
fanatic.
Sanity's little helper
> Do you really think the world evolves
> around you and your religion?
Freudian slip?
--
Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow, we eat, drink and be merry.
D Silverman FLAHN, SMLAHN
AA #2208
Smurfette
> news:e6qdncwaTewWsj_e...@adelphia.com...
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I
> was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
> his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his
> plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I
> felt
> a pang of profound despair.
>
If you'd tried that on me you'd have felt *my knee in your groin*, you
fucking fruitcake.
Mich.
Murf
Smurfette
news:1134720077.598392.326350@f14g2000cwb.
>
> But if you're going to make these little sketches up, why not be a bit
> more entertaining? You know, returning a dead parrot to a 'boutique'
> and claiming it couldn't possibly evolved from bleedin' dinosaurs...
>
Customer: Hello. I wish to complain about this so-called 'scientific theory'
what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very establishment.
Salesman: Oh yes, 'Intelligent Design'. What, uh... what's wrong with it?
Customer: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. Its vacuous, that's
what's wrong with it!
Salesman: No, no, uh... what we need now is to 'teach the controversy'...
Customer: Look matey, I know an empty 'argument from incredulity' when I see
one, and I'm looking at one right now.
Salesman: No, no, it's not empty: it's just being elaborated. Remarkable
theory, 'Intelligent Design', innit, eh? I mean, just look at all these
books and articles: millions and millions of words...!
Customer: The verbiage don't enter into it, my lad. It's stone dead. It's a
non-starter. Empirically untestable, it belongs in metaphysics. This
'theory' makes no predictions; has no contribution to make beyond extended
polemics; and can't even be honest about who it thinks the 'Designer' was.
Bereft of all logical and epistemological credibility, it has no scientific
status! If certain right-wing and fundamentalist pressure-groups hadn't hit
upon it as a way of opposing decades of uncomfortable scientific and social
progress, it'd be pushing up daisies! It's off the table. It's kicked the
waste-paper bucket. THIS IS A NON-THEORY!
Salesman: Well, I'd better replace it then. [takes a quick peek around]
Sorry,
squire: looks like that's all we've got...
Customer: I see, I see. I get the picture.
Salesman: I've got a piece of coal that looks quite a bit like a human
tibia, if you squint at it...
Customer: Pray, is it part of a theory that unifies the paleontological and
biological sciences and leads to a powerful understanding of observed
homologies and the nested hierarchy of life?
Salesman: Not really.
Customer: WELL IT'S HARDLY A BLOODY REPLACEMENT FOR DARWINISM THEN, IS IT?
----------
Mich.
Shane
> His
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours.
Pour guy, apparently he hade no pause to ooze from. Let us pores to
reflect how well designed is the human poor, that causes sweat to paw
when approached by a wacko.
Pores-etively, a-pore-ling writing there Logos.
--
Shane
The truth will set you free..
Kleuskes & Moos
Murf schreef:
> Logos - do you have any shread of decency or honesty?
Nope. But he's got a lot of fantasy to make up for it. Sadly his
writing skills are WAY below standard.
ErikW
This stinks.
Cop story pwns yu^^.
Iain
Logos wrote:
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
>
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
I say, old chap, you used 11 words of French origin in your post.
What is a Cafe au Lait the gentleman in question ordered? This is the
mark of a secularist and no mistake. They mostly gather in places like
Colchester.
I once went into a similar establishment, and asked for a pot of
Lapsang Souchong, a cup and saucer and some toast with Gentleman's
Relish, and was arrested on suspicion of associating with a Mr. Al
Kider.
Yours, ever languid,
~I.J.
ErikW
Kleuskes & Moos
Logos schreef:
Ok. Lets critique this piece of lecture.
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
Mwoh.. Not bad.
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
So far, so good, only these two remarks doe not deserve seperate
paragraphs. Make it a single paragraph, so you'll keep some 'speed' in
the storyline.
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
Given the content of the story, this is irrelevant. Nobody wants to
know where you came from. You make yourself the main part of the story,
which _sounds_ rather egocentrical. After all You don't play any role
of substance in your story, it's the 'secularist' you want to trash,
remember?
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
Tsk, tsk, tsk... Coffee isn't hyphenated.
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
French aren't really big in coffee. Try Italianized. If you want to
harp on anti-european sentiments, at least get the country right. Also,
concentrate on the main theme and loose superfluous detail. Prices at
coffeeshops isn't. Good writers are marksman, one shot, one hit. You
employ the buckshot tactics of an amateur.
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist.
There's a lot wrong with that sentence.
A few paragraphs back, you said you were walking towards your car. Also
you have expressed a distaste for that place, so you walking towards
it, stretches credibility. Also, nobody can 'spot a anything-ist' by
merely looking at him.
> With his well-coiffed hair and urbane mien.
Mien? From the german 'Miene'? Also 'well coiffed' isn't an attribute
of secularists.
> His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro coiffure.
That belongs with the sentence above, as a summation. Also, there are
credibility issues, here. You come from a hardware store, have a
distinct distaste of anything not your style and youe xpect anyone to
believe you can spot a clothes brand at a glance? No way.
Moreover, you repeat yourself on the coifure, and (implicitly) pay
europeans a big compliment for having fine barbers, which (probably)
isn't what you set out to do. Besides, since you're dissing him, the
reader will imagine you in a contrast: a badly dressed provincial git
with a bad hairdo.
> The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him.
Credibility, again. I've told you this before, if you are writing
fiction, keep it credible. You now expect your audience to believe you
can read minds by looking at people or assume you are a prejudiced,
frustrated moron who's projecting.
> The hedonistic way he chattered into his $300 cell phone
Tsk, tsk, tsk... That's not a very expensive one, is it. So
'hedonistic' does not reflect on your subject, but on yourself.
> about his investments in eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy.
Implicitly, you are now saying you are eavesdropping. Not nice.
Remember, the point ofthe exercise is to dis you subject, not yourself.
Sofar you've only succeeded in making yourself look like a provincial,
prejudiced git who'se eavesdropping and _still walks into a coffeeshop
which he detests, since otherwise you could never have heard that.
> His gay brother and his transsexual daughter.
That, again, belongs with the summation in the last sentence. Besides,
you're overdoing it again. All the subjects mentioned imply you were
listening for quite some time (nobody mentions all those subjects in
any conversation fast enough to be overheard by someone walking from a
hardware store to his car. So you _must_ have walked into that
coffeeshop( which you detest and did not set out to do), portraying
yourself as an obsessed character. This isn't wwaht you want. You
merely want to dis the _real_ subject, which you portray as a
well-groomed, tolerant guy with a good job and money to spend, making
yourself (by contrast, and that's what your story is all about "me vs.
him") as a low-income bum with sloppy clothes and a problem with
tolerance.
> His hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours.
Political preferences don't ooze from pores. Besides, you fail to
mention how you noticed or what his political preference has to do with
the story-line, which, by the way, now places you eavesdropping and
all, inside the coffeeshop you detest, since otherwise, you'd nevr be
able to hear a word he said on the phone.
> The way he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
> a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
Same thing again. Any smoker will tell you you don't replace a smoking
habit by anything, let alone a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
Your knowledge about the coffee server also implies you have more than
a passing knowledge of the menu of that coffeeshop, which is too much
of a contrast with your distaste expressed earlier.
> The way he deftly manouvered from one politically correct phrase to another.
So walking from a hardware store to your car you managed to pick all
_that_ up? There's a credibility problem for you. The only way this is
crdible is if your 'I'-character is an obsessive-compulsive
eaves-dropper. So basically you are now (implicitly) dissing the wrong
character and making the _real_ subject of your story look as his
innocent victim.
If that's what you set out to do, you do so _very_ subtly, i must
admit.
> All this I could sense in him in the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
Ah... Now i see. Subtle... Compliments. Yes, a very subtle way to
portray a narrowminded, obsessive, bigotted looser, frustrated by
another persons obvious success in life. Reminds me of 'The Catcher in
the Rye', which employs the same kind of technique. Not that good,
though...
Some 'monologue interieure' would probably help you. But...
Compliments, you brought it very subtly.
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again.
Good, you elaborate on the obsessive traits of the 'I-character'.
> He looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses.
Again, mentioning the Dior glasses is a nice touch to emphasize your
'I-characters' frustrations
in life.
Nice.
> I peered into his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas.
Now you're overdoing it...
> I felt a pang of profound despair.
Nah.... You were doing _so_ well.
> He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you mean.
> I just snickered at him and walked off.
Try a little dialoge, like this
""What's you deal", he asked.
" You are." I responded, peering him into the eye and walked off.
> Demolishing him would have been too easy.
Hmmm... No. You lead up to something with your portrayal of a
frustrated, bigotted looser. Your audience expects some kind of
dramatic climax, like whipping out a gun and killing him. That would
have lent some _point_ to your story. Now it's really going nowhere.
Ok, you get a C+ for your portrayal of the I-charachter, which really
_is_ quite subtle, but your story does lack a good ending, and has
quite a few credibility problems. However frustrated, he shows too much
knowledge and all the 'talking on the phone' stuff is just not
possible. Try to make it more clear that your 'I-character' is really
just imagining it and don't overdo it. Hence no B, let alone an A, but
you're progressing.
Work on the credibility, though.
zawa...@yahoo.com
Logos wrote:
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
>
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
>
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
> well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy.
I thougth secularists were down and out drug addicts and only the
"Christians" had the cash for 30,000 sq. ft. homes.
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
Maybe your president. And it is spelled "pores". "pours" is something
the barrista is doing to the latte.
> he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
> a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
No second hand smoke with lattes
>
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
> his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
> a pang of profound despair.
>
Paranoid schizoprenia with delusions of telepathy ?
> He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you mean.
> I just snickered at him and walked off. Demolishing him would have been too
> easy.
Continued ...
"Later the police showed up at my door with a strait-jacket. Now I am
regularly taking my anti-psychotic meds and no longer think I am
hearing other's thoughts"
Gordon Hill
to meet with Jerry Falwell.
All the best, GH
zawa...@yahoo.com
Logos wrote:
>well-coiffed
So you ran into Jimmy Swaggart ?
zawa...@yahoo.com
Shane
[...]
Lets examine the contrast between a creationist and a secularist.
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way.
Yep, that's the godly way, I doubt there are too many on this forum
surprised by that behaviour. Lets now see the reaction from the one with
"no moral standards."
> At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside.
Stepped aside, hey, how secualrly rude of him, fancy him trying to show
you up by being more poilte than you.
> I stepped in front of him again.
You just can't stop the godliness oozing from the pours[sic] of some
people can you?
> He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses.
Yeah, now that is a secularist move if I ever heard of one, no wonder
these secularists are so easy to spot. They show quite a contrast from
the creationist.
> I peered into
> his eyes.
Staring is normally considered rude, so score another one where the
secularist beats the creationist for politeness.
> In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
> a pang of profound despair.
But wait, the encounter is not over yet, the secularist is going to
unleash the famous uncontrolled tongue, spoken of so eloquently in the
bible.
> He asked me what my deal was.
A very well known skit by Derek and Clive (Peter Cook and Dudley Moore)
springs to mind here. Fancy that secularist asking the boorish^H^H^H^H^H
nice creationist a provocative question like that.
[...]
Geoff
news:n2t4q1pfrq0grkous...@4ax.com...
> On Thu, 15 Dec 2005 22:07:50 -0500, "Logos" <sd...@sds.sds> wrote:
>>I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
>>which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee
>>places.
>>You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
>>Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
>>on top then they can mark it up 400%.
>
> Blatantly obvious lie number 1! I'm not much for 'pretentious'
> coffee, but I don't doubt for a minute that you can't pass a 'plain
> old cup of coffee' as such and stay in business, particularly a
> business that specializes in coffee! (I'm from Seattle, I should
> know!)
The greater sin is the Robusta crap that they sell in most quickie
marts and fast food joints for $1 a cup.
Geoff
news:1134737921.6...@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
>
> Logos wrote:
>>well-coiffed
> So you ran into Jimmy Swaggart ?
Twice no less!
John Bode
Effing. BRILLIANT.
I am *so* stealing this.
Gordon Hill
What is his plan?
Just wondering, GH
Geoff
news:1134736162.4...@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
>
> Logos schreef:
>
> Ok. Lets critique this piece of lecture.
[...]
Excellent critique. You are right. The story is not credible. It reads more
like a fantasy. He probably conjures up these little encounters that he
describes in his head during auto-erotic asphyxiation and then writes them
down feverishly after he bites the lemon.
Therion Ware
On 16 Dec 2005 06:35:16 -0800 in talk.origins, John Bode ("John Bode"
<john...@my-deja.com>) said, directing the reply to talk.origins
"Me too". (c) AOL 4004 BC
Lilith (Deanne Taylor)
Thanks for that. :)
Someone better followup-nominate this one for POTM with me.
Lilith (Deanne Taylor)
successful, good taste, secularlist. Mmmm.
Some of the women out here in cyberspace want to know if he was hot,
though. Was he wearing a nice aftershave?
Men like that don't grow on trees!
Steven Sullivan
amde sure he knew where there nearest shelter was, and bid him a
happy Festivus.
--
-S
"The most appealing intuitive argument for atheism is the mindblowing stupidity of religious
fundamentalists." -- Ginger Yellow
Phil Roberts
$3...@online.de:
> 'nuff said.
>
Well no, not really. As I have no idea what thread you are referring to. Of
course with so many psychotics posting at the moment I can pretty much take
my pick. :p
--
wade
Logos wrote:
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
So it wasn't a dark and stormy night? Hmmm.
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
I remember all the details because otherwise I would have had to
focus on the blonde walking into Vicky's secret. But with legs
that long and a skirt that short the secret wasn't ment to be
kept for long.
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
> well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter.
Of course I'd met his brother before and even though it was dark in
the bathhouse I could still make out the family resemblence.
The daughter's a whole nuther story but I assure you the charges
were all dropped nearly as fast as I had run away when I discovered
she wasn't actually a scared and lost little boy.
> His
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
> he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
> a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
<aside: what? no soy? >
>The way he deftly manouvered from
> one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him in
> the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
That's right, He hated Guarenteed Overnight Delivery. Because it was
an actual dark and stormy night when one of their trucks shed one of
their cheap retread tires just as it was passing his wife on the
highway.
The flying scrap of tire launched out like possessed piece of shrapnel,
wrapping itself around the drivers side tire of the car and forcing it
to
skid off the pavement, over the bridge, into the river and a cold
watery
premature grave.
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
> his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
> a pang of profound despair.
That's right, even after a life filled with hard knocks and the tragic
loss
of his wife he still managed to get out of bed in the morning with
something other than hate for his fellow man. Me, I'm just a cheap
hack scared to wander more than 4 blocks from the house where
I live with my mother, except when the demons take hold and send
me sulking into the night to the bath house or seeking runaways
at the bus stop.
http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/dark.htm
Keep practising logos, but do it somewhere else.
Gordon Hill
All the best, GH
Beagle
merrily.
Dana Tweedy
"Kleuskes & Moos" <kle...@xs4all.nl> wrote in message
news:1134736162.4...@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
>
>> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
>
> Tsk, tsk, tsk... Coffee isn't hyphenated.
That's right, it's Caffeinated.
DJT
Inez
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy.
I am curious as to how one chatters hedonistically. I might want to
try it myself, can you give any pointers?
Smurfette
news:1134743716.649450.208070@z14g2000cwz.
>
> Effing. BRILLIANT.
>
> I am *so* stealing this.
:-)
M.
zawa...@yahoo.com
Simply brilliant !
zawa...@yahoo.com
Beagle wrote:
> Well done re: dead parrot. I and my half bee, Eric, chortled away
> merrily.
zawa...@yahoo.com
mvil...@gmail.com
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
I'm worse than a secularist, I'm an atheist. I work in aerospace
creating stuff that kills people (actually the stuff that guides the
stuff to what needs to be killed). I watch pornography on occasion,
I've had pre-marital sex, I cuss at least one word a day, I don't go to
church, I drink alchohol on occasion, I've been to a strip club and
paid women to get naked in front of my friend (unbeknownst to his then
fiance), and I'm convinced that the ToE is the best explanation for the
history of life on earth!!! Oh and I've lived in Paris with those
decadent commie frogs, and while I lived there I made the occasional
trip to the gateway to hell that is Amsterdam, and now I live
commie-liberal-atheist-god-hating Los Angeles, CA!
How come you never meet face to face with ME! My hellbound lifestyle
would so make your stories so much more interesting!
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
Oh that's why. At 2pm I'm still at work. Earning a living. Paying my
taxes. The majority of which goes to federal funds and only a small
portion of which gets spent on the socialist state of California where
I live. The rest of those taxes get redistributed to non-socialist
christian states.
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
I know what you mean. Only a
socularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie would spent
16hours of their day running a business like that, generating income
for the city and creating jobs for people.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
Typical thing to do for a
secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie. Only they
could see a possibility of an opening in a certain consumer market, and
ruthlesstly exploit that consumer demand, with the side effect of
generating income and jobs.
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
> well-coiffed hair and urbane mien.
Typical thing for a
secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie. Real
God-fearing men have mullets.
> His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone
Shame on this secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie
for spending his money and keeping this country's economy going.
> about his investments in
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates
Shame on this secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie
for spending his money and keeping this country's economy going.
> and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy.
Shame on this secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie
for keeping his doctor employed! That doctor probably believed in
evolution anyway.
> His gay brother and his transsexual daughter.
Shame on this secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie
for turning his brother into a homosexual, and for making his son get a
sex-change operation!.
> His
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours.
Shame on this secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie
for ruthlessly exploiting the first amendment!
> The way
> he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
> a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
Shame on this secularist-homosexual-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie
for spending his money and keeping this country's economy going.
> The way he deftly manouvered from
> one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him in
> the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
_h my G_d he hates G_d!
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again.
[snip]
See at this point, had that been me, my
secularist-socialist-atheist-liberal-commie instincts would kick in and
at this point the Devil would've used my corrupt spirit as a medium to
take possession of that coffee cup, causing that
triple-mocha-whip-cream-latte steaming at 90degC to "accidentaly" leap
out of my hand and fall onto your groin.
Thurisaz the Einherjer
>> 'nuff said.
> Well no, not really. As I have no idea what thread you are referring to.
> Of course with so many psychotics posting at the moment I can pretty much
> take my pick. :p
I was referring to laggy's opening posting in this thread, Message ID
e6qdncwaTewWsj_e...@adelphia.com
Hope to have helped ;)
--
Romans 2:24 revised:
"For the name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles through you
cretinists, as it is written on aig."
Frank J
Logos wrote:
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
>
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
>
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter. His
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
> he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
> one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him in
> the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
Well at least your secularist is not an atheist. :-)
>
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
> his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
> a pang of profound despair.
>
> He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you mean.
> I just snickered at him and walked off. Demolishing him would have been too
> easy.
John Harshman
[terminated with extreme prejudice]
Did you forget you had already posted this once? Once is boring; twice
is boring squared. Time to close up shop and try some other profession.
Sanity's little helper
This one:
e6qdncwaTewWsj_e...@adelphia.com
It's a doozy.
--
Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow, we eat, drink and be merry.
D Silverman FLAHN, SMLAHN
AA #2208
Josh M.
"Logos" <sd...@sds.sds> wrote in message
news:e6qdncwaTewWsj_e...@adelphia.com...
>I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
>
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee
> places.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
>
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
> well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of
> the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter.
> His
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
> he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction
> to
> a triple grande mocha chai with steam. The way he deftly manouvered from
> one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him
> in
> the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
You were able to ascertain all of this without speaking to him?
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I
> was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
> his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his
> plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I
> felt
> a pang of profound despair.
>
> He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you
> mean.
> I just snickered at him and walked off. Demolishing him would have been
> too
> easy.
So, you've judged him without even getting to know him and you've treated
him rudely. How very Christian of you.
Jeffrey Turner
> On Thu, 15 Dec 2005 22:07:50 -0500, "Logos" <sd...@sds.sds> wrote:
>
>
>>way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
>>eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
>>his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter. His
>>hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
>>he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
>>a triple grande mocha chai with steam.
>
I thought chai was tea anyway.
--Jeff
--
The national government will
preserve and defend those basic
principles on which our government
has been built up. They regard
Christianity as the foundation of
our national morality and the
family as the basis of national
life. --Adolf Hitler
er...@swva.net
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
>
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
>
>
You know men's suit coat and sunglasses brands by sight. What a swish!
Eric Root
Harvest Dancer
Jason Harvestdancer
John Wilkins
> I'm a secularist and I'm ok, I sleep all night and I work all day.
>
--
John S. Wilkins, Postdoctoral Research Fellow, Biohumanities Project
University of Queensland - Blog: evolvethought.blogspot.com
Nihil tam absurdum quod non quidam Philosophi dixerit - adapted from Cicero
catshark
I hope you don't mind:
<http://dododreams.blogspot.com/2005/12/pythonized.html>
Trust me, it doesn't count against your 15 minutes . . .
--
---------------
J. Pieret
---------------
In the name of the bee
And of the butterfly
And of the breeze, amen
- Emily Dickinson -
Do you think everyone should have a blog?
Here is the counter-evidence: <http://dododreams.blogspot.com/>
Stuart
Logos wrote:
<snip>
So was this another one of your wet dreams?
Stuart
rich hammett
> I came face to face with a secularist today.
> It happened about 2:00 in the afternoon.
> I was coming out of the hardware store, walking down the street to my car,
> which was parked in front of one of those pretentious little coffee places.
> You know the kind, where they think if they give a quadruple-hyphenated,
> Frenchified name to a plain old cup of coffee with a plop of whipped cream
> on top then they can mark it up 400%.
> As I'm walking towards the place, I spotted him: the secularist. With his
> well-coiffed hair and urbane mien. His Brooks Bros overcoat and Euro
> coiffure. The way he shiftily eyed his surroundings, ever conscious of the
> perceived encroachment of religion and decency around him. The hedonistic
> way he chattered into his $300 cell phone about his investments in
> eco-friendly, liberal conglomerates and his visits to his doctor regarding
> his lactose intolerancy. His gay brother and his transsexual daughter. His
> hatred of our President and Vice-President oozing from his pours. The way
> he replaced his socially unacceptable smoking addiction with an addiction to
> a triple grande mocha chai with steam. The way he deftly manouvered from
> one politically correct phrase to another. All this I could sense in him in
> the first second I spotted him. And he hated G_d.
> So I walked straight up to him. Got in his way. At first he thought I was
> trying to pass so he stepped aside. I stepped in front of him again. He
> looked up from the phone and peered over his Dior glasses. I peered into
> his eyes. In that split second, I saw into his empty soul, sensed his plans
> for a liberal world hegemony, his ambitions to eradicate Christmas. I felt
> a pang of profound despair.
> He asked me what my deal was. I told him he was. He said what do you mean.
> I just snickered at him and walked off. Demolishing him would have been too
> easy.
You were incredibly rude. If you had waited a few more seconds,
I could have ended the call and chatted with you.
rich
--
-to reply, it's hot not warm
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\ Rich Hammett http://home.hiwaay.net/~rhammett
/ The Bill Clinton of RSFC