Thunk!
Scott Dorsey
Hide, from the cat sucking-up machine.
Here it comes again.
Here it comes, with a horrifying whine, a deep whiz, a thundering whirr.
It makes a sound like nothing alive.
From time to time, it pokes the nozzle under things. A clicking sound
is heard, then sometimes a loud "Thunk!" as it sucks a cat up into the
huge round tank where it is never heard from again.
We must hide under the sofa.
We must hide under the bed.
It is coming for us.
Coming, with the huge lacquered plate that reads "Electrolux."
The cat sucking-up machine is here.
--scott
--
"C'est un Nagra. C'est suisse, et tres, tres precis."
Matt Marchese
> From time to time, it pokes the nozzle under things. A clicking sound
> is heard, then sometimes a loud "Thunk!" as it sucks a cat up into the
> huge round tank where it is never heard from again.
My cow-orker's wife keeps forgetting to close the garage door. Their cat
likes to climb up and sit on top of the door while it's up, so my cow-orker
is constantly yelling at her to keep it closed.
Today she opened the door, then remembered that she'd left something inside
the house and went back to get it. She returned 10 minutes later, hopped
into the car and drove off, closing the garage door behind her.
When she returned about 20 minutes later, she was horrified to see the cat
hanging by its tail from the lintel of the garage door. It wasn't moving and
appeared to be dead. In a panic and not thinking too clearly, she opened the
door with the remote while still sitting in her car. The cat promptly
dropped to the ground like a rock. It did not land on its feet. It landed on
its head.
Completely hysterical now and convinced it was a goner, she ran over to
where the cat was lying. It opened one eye, looked at her, and growled. A
visit to the vet quickly established that the cat had suffered no permanent
damage.
SSC: I laughed so hard that I cried when I heard this little saga.
Then I went home and gave my cat a good brushing and a couple of Pounce[tm].
--
Matt
George William Herbert
I'd like to sit here lounging
Yes I really really would
But the din in my head
It's too much and it's no good
I'm standing in windy tunnel
Shouting through the roar
And I'd like to flee this nation
For somewhere safe to snore
But suck makes noise
It's a ringing kind of fear
Suck makes noise
And I can't really hear you
In the thickening of fear
I think that I might want to know
The details and the facts
But there's something in that bag
That just looks like a dead cat
So just forget it sock I think it's really
Cool that you're around
But I'll have to play again
After the silence has returned
Cause suck makes noise
It's a ringing kind of fear
Suck makes noise
And I can't really hear you
In the thickening of fear
Suck makes noise....
-george
Sorry, Suzanne...