RICHH'S Funeral

[howieh]

I thought the pain from losing my brother was unbearable...that was
before I tried to make it through the "Kaddish" post.

I would imagine that the Israelis must be writing those kinds of posts
to the suicide bombers on a daily basis.

Here is one of the sentences, reprinted without permission

"Fire ants had sent an exploratory colony into the tawny sand and, it
seemed, given that up as a bad job."

I know, I know . What the hell is tawny sand... at first I thought it
had something to do with Tawny Kitaen ..but alas.

######################################

Here is how the funeral went down ..

St Augustine was decided on for two reason:

rich had not made his wishes known
my father had a buy one/half off the second coupon from the last time
we buried someone there.

The place surrounding the cemetery is one step up from a trailer park,
and I am not talking about a "triple wide" park either... its run
down and in the middle of nowhere... after my initial shock, it
started to grow on me and seemed an appropriate final destination for
richs ashes .yes my parents buried the ashes.

There were a small group of my parents friends/relatives there no one
rich kept in touch with...richs girlfriend and her father also had
made the trip.

My father was very upset so my wife read his eulogy, which consisted
of a laundry list of richs pointless accomplishments, spelling bee
wins, college acceptance, etc

My father left out what I considered to be richs biggest
accomplishments, blowing up the neighbors fence when he was 11,
cracking his head open on the trampoline at gymnastics camp, and how
he was able to hang himself..though he was paralyzed on one half of
his body, and only had use of one arm and one leg.

Dad is a newspaper man he should be better with details ..

My mother read her eulogy herself it was very emotional, I cried richs
girlfriend cried

Then my wife, richs girlfriend and myself stood up and recreated the
video for Vanilla Ices "Ice Ice Baby"

Yo, VIP, Lets kick it!

Stop collaborate and listen, Ice is here with a brand new
invention....

After a rousing applause from some of my hipper relatives and some
crack dealers on the other side of the cemetery fence we had brunch, I
ate way too much of the prime rib I always eat way too much of the
prime rib

Yo man -- Lets get out of here! Word to your mother!

/hlh

[Matt Marchese]

howieh wrote:

> and how he was able to hang himself..though he was paralyzed on one half
> of
> his body, and only had use of one arm and one leg.

As this is RICHH we're talking about here, I prefer to maintain the
illusion that he died of autoerotic asphixiation rather than a plain old
vanilla suicide.

Requiscat In Pace, you filthy prevert you.

--
Matt

[Scott Dorsey]

Matt Marchese <mattj...@netscape.net> wrote:
>howieh wrote:
>
>> and how he was able to hang himself..though he was paralyzed on one half
>> of
>> his body, and only had use of one arm and one leg.
>
>As this is RICHH we're talking about here, I prefer to maintain the
>illusion that he died of autoerotic asphixiation rather than a plain old
>vanilla suicide.

Not a Bondo impaction?
--scott

We are all still Renee, and we will always be. Thanks a lot, Rich,
wherever you are.
--
"C'est un Nagra. C'est suisse, et tres, tres precis."