Google Groups no longer supports new Usenet posts or subscriptions. Historical content remains viewable.
Dismiss

NEW PRODUCT!

1 view
Skip to first unread message

Scott Dorsey

unread,
Nov 12, 2000, 3:00:00 AM11/12/00
to
Now, from BORON, the company that brought the Megadent Tooth Enlarging
Cream, the Roboblow Electric Blowjob Machine, and of course SUPERLAX, the
only Laxative with Cobalt-60! BORON, the company that brought you Kentucky
Morning Bourbon-Flavoured Breakfast Cereal! BORON, the company that brought
you the Gorko the Punisher Doll! BORON now revolutionizes your life in another
miraculous way, with DRUID-O-MATIC: the portable stone circle. Now you don't
have to travel to Stonehenge, you can have your own henge right on your
wrist. DRUID-O-MATIC is a complete stone circle with a digital clock that
straps right to your wrist for any convenient astronomical measurements.
DRUID-O-MATIC is endorsed by someone who met CARL SAGAN once. Get your
DRUID-O-MATIC today. Just call 1-800-DRUIDIC, that's 1-800-DRUIDIC. Do
it now!

--
"C'est un Nagra. C'est suisse, et tres, tres precis."

Kent Paul Dolan

unread,
Nov 14, 2000, 3:00:00 AM11/14/00
to


Notice how kludge can get the proper number of letters after the dash to make
a seven digit phone number? That's what a computer science education does for
you. These ads with eight, or sometimes even nine, letters floating out there
to spell something important to the advertiser but not to me, never get my
phone call. I just cannot handle the stress of trying to decide what to do
with the extra letters, dial them or eat the part of the ad containing them,
to protect the information they encode from superspies.

BORON should be proud to have Mr. Kludge as its corporate spokesgeek.

I visualize him in a scene from LA Story or whatever, practicing his pointing,
como la zorra[1].

Xanthian.
--
Kent, the man from xanth. | Can we hurry this up? | Reputed net.scum Latter
Kent Paul Dolan. | I have places to go, | Day Saint propagandist
<xant...@well.com> | and people to insult. | and known rabid atheist.

[1]I'm more than convinced you cannot do this to an innocent masculine
noun in Spanish. Go away, you annoy me.

kim

unread,
Nov 15, 2000, 1:00:22 AM11/15/00
to
Kludge: is it too late to order from BORON the laser shower scum
remover/penile trimmer?
I like my home life to be neat and tidy.

Scott Dorsey

unread,
Nov 15, 2000, 3:00:00 AM11/15/00
to
In article <12074-3A...@storefull-177.iap.bryant.webtv.net>,

We regret that this product was discontinued in 1996 after a report from
the UN Commission on War Crimes suggested that it may have been in
contravention of certain provisions of the Geneva Convention.

However, this fall we hope to be introducing a new lawnmowing device
based around recently-declassified Reagan-era space-based weapons systems.
You may find this of interest.
--scott

Ken Johnson

unread,
Nov 18, 2000, 3:00:00 AM11/18/00
to
kim <hyacint...@webtv.net> wrote in message
news:12074-3A...@storefull-177.iap.bryant.webtv.net..
.


IHNJH, IJLS "penile trimmer"

Ken Johnson

--
http://simsey.cjb.net
Ken Johnson Ltd.
Enter replacement or cancel.


0 new messages