What I Learned About Personals Ads
IrishWinks
I'd post it here. If you see yourself in it, please don't take it
personally - you have a *lot* of company!
* * * * *
My journey through personals hell has been grueling, but I have
learned a few things! I'm sharing them (most from alt.com but
a few other places too) in hopes of helping some poor sot who
doesn't know any better than to be genuine:
How To Get the Most Out of Personals
Be sure to tag your personals ad with a snappy, attention-getter like:
"Hey Ladies, let's get nasty!"
If you are going to use a pic in your profile, use a poorly lit
close-up of your penis - with hard-on, of course.
If you have the option of selecting gender of your partners and
activities you enjoy - select everything. Even if you don't know what
it means, you might like it!
When describing yourself, pretend that you are trying to get a street
whore to give you a freebie, and you'll have just the right tone.
When describing physical attributes of potential partners - shoot for
the moon! Try something like "Must be petite, Asian, blonde hair,
blue eyes, addicted to the taste of cum and anally-oriented."
If you claim a dom interest in BDSM, come across as the domliest dom
you can be. You have a lot of competition out there! Be a billboard!
People do not post personals ads to meet people - they post them to
read ads - so BE an ad.
Another important point: Be sure to refer to submissiveness as
something graded on a bell curve. An example: "I am an excellent Dom
for those new to the scene and those who have reached an advanced
level of submissiveness."
Always, always, always claim years of experience and to be an expert
at helping newbies into "the lifestyle." Remember those two words -
"the lifestyle" - and use them over and over again, as if they
actually meant something. Also "the scene" is a particularly riveting
term that might mean anything, so it should be used repeatedly.
When answering personals ads from prospective partners, use ONLY a
one-line response. Avoid saying anything about yourself - MAKE the
other person go first.
If you can, try to refer to something buried in the profile of the ad
you are answering. For example: "What is your curiosity about
enemas?" makes for a charming one-line, first response that's likely
to get attention.
If you are fortunate enough to secure an email address - send Kinky
Cards by the dozen - you never have to say anything and you can't
overdo it!
And, if after following all these instructions, your intended does not
reply to your response - nag, harangue. Don't be afraid of sending a
note everyday saying something like, "I expected to hear back from you
by now!"
** note: The construction of this How-To was completed using only
real life examples.
Winks
*Note email addy is munged. Correct email is irish...@bresnan.net
Lynn
IrishWinks wrote:
>
> If you are going to use a pic in your profile, use a poorly lit
> close-up of your penis - with hard-on, of course.
<and other good stuff that I had to snip> I've heard so many people
complain about this that once, I had to ask if they were really telling
the truth. In response, I got multiple dick-pics. I'm still blown
away, that anyone would think that was a good strategy.
Lynn
Troia
*like* it.
But I'm clueless on the point too.
-- Troia
firefey
not only is it the number one strategy for men, it seems to be in the
top five for women. for me, the idea of having a relationship with
either gender's naughties is just about as unappealing as four day old
oatmeal. then again, i hear many people say they want to have their
brain stimulated. i guess there folk are just showing off their well
endowed brains.
firefey
not only is it the number one strategy for men, it seems to be in the
top five for women. for me, the idea of having a relationship with
either gender's naughties is just about as unappealing as four day old
oatmeal. then again, i hear many people say they want to have their
brain stimulated. i guess these folk are just showing off their well
endowed brains.
Ruth Lawrence
"Troia" <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote in message
news:45821eae$0$97245$892e...@authen.yellow.readfreenews.net...
Ummm...they may believe that. They may have been told that.
I know almost no women who want dick shots right away.
Ruth
M. Shirley Chong
> My journey through personals hell has been grueling, but I have
> learned a few things! I'm sharing them (most from alt.com but
> a few other places too) in hopes of helping some poor sot who
> doesn't know any better than to be genuine:
KEYBOARD ALERTS! Good grief, these young'uns have no respect for the
subtleties these days... <shuffleshufflecreakshuffle>
> When describing yourself, pretend that you are trying to get a street
> whore to give you a freebie, and you'll have just the right tone.
<ROFLMAO> But I would have thought saying "it'll only take me thirty
seconds" would be a turnoff.
> When answering personals ads from prospective partners, use ONLY a
> one-line response. Avoid saying anything about yourself - MAKE the
> other person go first.
In fact, use this strategy for the first few e-mails. Even if s/he
doesn't answer.
Shirley
SilverOz
Troia <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote:
> Lynn wrote:
>> <and other good stuff that I had to snip> I've heard so many people
>> complain about this that once, I had to ask if they were really telling
>> the truth. In response, I got multiple dick-pics. I'm still blown
>> away, that anyone would think that was a good strategy.
>>
> *like* it.
>
I presume that's because about half the women on internet sex sites
are men?
SilverOz
-who recalls that the women on talkers/muds/mushes could tell when
a man was pretending to be a woman easily but the men seemed to be utterly unable to.
Troia
Kinda wondered that same thought. Maybe I need the follow-up question:
"Did you ever actually meet any of those women?"
-- Troia
SilverOz
Norton Zenger <rusho...@gmail.com> wrote:
> SilverOz come on down:
>
>>SilverOz
>> -who recalls that the women on talkers/muds/mushes could tell when
>>a man was pretending to be a woman easily but the men seemed to be utterly unable to.
>
> is a powerful force, especially when coupled with the male libido. I've found
> it generally pretty easy to tell when someone is pretending to be female.
I suspect you are right. A very powerful force considering some of
the men (as men) were having online relationships with the men (as
women). The sex was good apparently :)
> (Clue #1: Any "woman" who comes online and the first words out of her mouth
> are about how horny she is? Not actually a woman. On the other hand, any
> woman who comes online and complains about how her breasts are asymmetrical?
> Actually a woman. Men pretending to be women always have perfectly
> symmetrical breasts. Also, men pretending to be women do not menstruate.
> Ever.)
Women who have and description of their boobs in name or description,
or any reference to sexiness in same. Women who speak/act like bad
porn...
On the other hand I dunno if many women pose as men. I have done it
once for an experiment but not with the idea of getting into any
virtual female pants so no idea if there's similar tricks or similar
blind spots.
I don't recall many women online talking to men about menstruation.
Amongst ourselves yes. As in moaning about cramps and upsettedness.
I suppose there was a certain amount of moodswing but most stayed
offline when feeling bad.
SilverOz
SilverOz
Norton Zenger <rusho...@gmail.com> wrote:
> IrishWinks come on down:
>>When answering personals ads from prospective partners, use ONLY a
>>one-line response. Avoid saying anything about yourself - MAKE the
>>other person go first.
>
> personals ads _do_- there's no point in making each message extremely detailed
> and personal, because odds are you won't hear back from 99 of them. Hell,
Which probably explains the ones I got. I wrote a detailed ad, and
got back a lot of "tell me more" emails. With those 3 words, perhaps
2 or 3 more.
Bitbucketed of course, so "write little cos you never get an answer"
is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Then there's the other method of scattergunning which is send your own
ad to every ad you see. Even if your ad is nothing to do with
anything they've said they are interested in. Got a few of those too.
There really does seem to be a certain belief out there in standing on
street corners saying "wanna fuck?"
SilverOz
- who did get a couple of interesting answers in a huge pile of dross
but neither of them was in the same hemisphere and I've done the
long distance thing...
Ruth Lawrence
"SilverOz" <zeb...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:slrneo4f6e...@gmail.com...
> In soc.subculture.bondage-bdsm on Thu, 14 Dec 2006 20:03:57 -0800
> Troia <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote:
>> Lynn wrote:
>>> <and other good stuff that I had to snip> I've heard so many people
>>> complain about this that once, I had to ask if they were really telling
>>> the truth. In response, I got multiple dick-pics. I'm still blown
>>> away, that anyone would think that was a good strategy.
>>>
>> More than one guy has told me that about half the women who contact them
>> *like* it.
>>
>
> I presume that's because about half the women on internet sex sites
> are men?
:::laughs:::
Ruth
Troia
> On the other hand I dunno if many women pose as men. I have done it
> once for an experiment but not with the idea of getting into any
> virtual female pants so no idea if there's similar tricks or similar
> blind spots.
In technical groups, it is not uncommon for women to post in a
deliberately genderless fashion. One of the top Windows XP "MVP's" has
a gender-neutral name and most people assume she is a he.
On the other hand, in groups oriented to talk of sexuality, I doubt many
women fake it.
-- Troia
SilverOz
Troia <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote:
> SilverOz wrote:
>
>> On the other hand I dunno if many women pose as men. I have done it
>> once for an experiment but not with the idea of getting into any
>> virtual female pants so no idea if there's similar tricks or similar
>> blind spots.
>
> In technical groups, it is not uncommon for women to post in a
> deliberately genderless fashion. One of the top Windows XP "MVP's" has
> a gender-neutral name and most people assume she is a he.
There's a long running joke on aus.motorcycles about what a great
bloke that Zebee is.
And Skud has for years dealt with people on tech forums who think
"Kirrily Robert" is probably "Robert Kirrily" who has a weird way of
writing his name.
> On the other hand, in groups oriented to talk of sexuality, I doubt many
> women fake it.
IN groups where net.sex is normal I suppose women might fake being men
on the grounds that everything happens on the net but I doubt it's
anywhere near as common as the reverse.
SilverOz
Brian G (Upstairs)
first place.
However, the time to really start to worry is when they send a picture of
their model railway as their first shot.
:-)
Brian
--
--
___________________________________________________________________________
I hope I grow on you....
I'm a Fungi!!!
Blind User, no pictures please!
mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk
___________________________________________________________________________
"SilverOz" <zeb...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:slrneo4f6e...@gmail.com...
Brian G (Upstairs)
I will say though that there are women who talk themselves up just to feel
the salivating power they have over men who are totally ruled by that
alternate brain cell between our legs. OK, I admit it, it is a factor, but
when you get a bit older, you learn how to keep control over it. :-)
Brian
--
--
___________________________________________________________________________
I hope I grow on you....
I'm a Fungi!!!
Blind User, no pictures please!
mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk
___________________________________________________________________________
"Norton Zenger" <rusho...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:7cg4o25hpdfiqshu0...@4ax.com...
> SilverOz come on down:
>
>>SilverOz
>> -who recalls that the women on talkers/muds/mushes could tell when
>>a man was pretending to be a woman easily but the men seemed to be utterly
>>unable to.
>
> I think "unwilling to" would be a better descriptor. Suspension of
> disbelief
> is a powerful force, especially when coupled with the male libido. I've
> found
> it generally pretty easy to tell when someone is pretending to be female.
>
> (Clue #1: Any "woman" who comes online and the first words out of her
> mouth
> are about how horny she is? Not actually a woman. On the other hand, any
> woman who comes online and complains about how her breasts are
> asymmetrical?
> Actually a woman. Men pretending to be women always have perfectly
> symmetrical breasts. Also, men pretending to be women do not menstruate.
> Ever.)
>
> --
> I'LL PUNCH A DONKEY IN THE STREETS OF GALWAY!
> I'LL PUNCH A DONKEY IN THE STREETS OF GALWAY!
> I'LL PUNCH A DONKEY IN THE STREETS OF GALWAY!
Brian G (Upstairs)
to them, who say they are not interested, all kept these pics and knew where
to find them when the subject came up.. erm maybe I needed to word that
better...:-)
Brian
--
--
___________________________________________________________________________
I hope I grow on you....
I'm a Fungi!!!
Blind User, no pictures please!
mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk
___________________________________________________________________________
"firefey" <twig...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1166155688....@f1g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
Ruth Lawrence
Not at all. of course not. Didn't cross my mind.
After all, I exchanged it for a tit shot.
Ruth
"Brian G (Upstairs)" <mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message
news:AOvgh.16523$k74...@text.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
Stephen Harris
> I know almost no women who want dick shots right away.
When I started chatting with Tori we must have sent a hundred emails
each within the first couple of days. Quite early on Tori asked for
naked pictures, so I had to actually _take_ some. I was hesitant
because I didn't want to "force" myself on her, but she said she really
really wanted them. So, yeah, a dick shot showing my uncircumcised
penis and the ginger curly hair.
In one of them I was naked except for various metal cuffs and a thin
collar; I think that was the one that persuaded Tori I was "worthy"
because she said I looked _so happy_ in that one. Well, who wouldn't
be? *giggle*
--
rgds, Stephen "Pleasure, little treasure"
An Englishman in New York, and loving slave to his Mistress, Tori.
BDSM thoughts, writings, poems and stuff: http://bdsm.spuddy.org/
Newsgroup charter, FAQs etc at http://bdsm.spuddy.org/newsgroups/
Ruth Lawrence
"Stephen Harris" <bd...@spuddy.org> wrote in message
news:t72ule...@spuddy.org...
> Ruth Lawrence <curly...@optusnet.com.au> wrote:
>
>> I know almost no women who want dick shots right away.
>
> When I started chatting with Tori we must have sent a hundred emails
> each within the first couple of days. Quite early on Tori asked for
> naked pictures, so I had to actually _take_ some.
You didn't just send one out of the blue though!!!
> I was hesitant
> because I didn't want to "force" myself on her, but she said she really
> really wanted them. So, yeah, a dick shot showing my uncircumcised
> penis and the ginger curly hair.
:::giggles:::
> In one of them I was naked except for various metal cuffs and a thin
> collar; I think that was the one that persuaded Tori I was "worthy"
> because she said I looked _so happy_ in that one. Well, who wouldn't
> be? *giggle*
Well, not me as I am not a bondage bottom, but I think I can understand why
she liked it.
Me, I had a sweetie take a nekkid shot of me. I have sent it when asked by
someone I know and trust enough.
Ruth, who may go to a small event in January in a self-inflicted rope
dress -despite not wanting hands tied- because she can
Karl Kleinpaste
> I'm still blown away
No freudian slip here, nosirree, not at all.
:-),
--karl
TyMeDwn1st
wrote:
I wonder about the true gender of those "women" who liked it.
--
Ty
Who is mostly just a
slightly skewed
Donna Reed
"To announce there must be no criticism of the president, or
that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is not
only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to
the American public."
-- Theodore Roosevelt
All hail Discordia
it she stopped talking to me. I can not understand why, I had every
thing all laid out nicely, the spoons on the left, the jell worms in
the center, the fly's on the right, and the leaders along the bottom
with my rod across the top.
*sigh*
No accounting for some tastes.
On Fri, 15 Dec 2006 11:28:58 GMT, "Brian G \(Upstairs\)"
<mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote:
>I've never understood why a man would want to pretend to be a woman in the
>first place.
>
>However, the time to really start to worry is when they send a picture of
>their model railway as their first shot.
>
>:-)
>
>
>Brian
>--
--
Grant
Bladerunner
> When I started chatting with Tori we must have sent a hundred emails
> each within the first couple of days. Quite early on Tori asked for
> naked pictures, so I had to actually _take_ some. I was hesitant
> because I didn't want to "force" myself on her, but she said she really
> really wanted them. So, yeah, a dick shot showing my uncircumcised
> penis and the ginger curly hair.
*So* totally different when she *asks* for one.
And I'm glad it turned out so well!
Bladerunner
SSBB Diplomatic Corps: Portland, OR
Karl Kleinpaste
> any woman who comes online and complains about how her breasts are
> asymmetrical? Actually a woman.
Using network access that is unrelated to the net.topological location
I normally inhabit, I metaphorically patrol a certain chat space under
two wildly different personas. One of them is a teenage girl.
She easily (though fictitiously) admits to being (hypothetically)
annoyed that she's built (in my mind) more or less like her
(nonexistent) mother, and is particularly (but perhaps existentially)
unhappy with her efforts at (what would be) weight control (if she
weren't a figment of my imagination).
You'd be alarmed how easily "her" mildly self-effacing opinion firms
up belief in the fiction.
fnordikins
OR
Wanted: dom who will do absolutely whatever I want in exchange for nothing.
Please send a blurry photo of your genitals (if any) your age, gender,
shoe size, eye color, all bank account numbers, favorite color, weight,
results of latest IQ test, and a $50 processing fee.
Must be discrete.
fnordikins
> More than one guy has told me that about half the women who contact them
> *like* it.
>
> But I'm clueless on the point too.
>
Perhaps those guys are too.
Ruth Lawrence
"fnordikins" <fnord...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:pan.2006.12.15....@yahoo.com...
:::laughs:::
Don't be surprised if you get replies, my young blue friend :-)
Ruth
user119
Hey! That was gonna be my ad.
--
Cui bonuo
remove the -N-COLD to reply
Golden California Girls
Oh I'm so *CRAZY* about you. I never thought anyone would ask for my bank
account number. But you aren't my type. You didn't ask for my SSN.
Sorry.
Lynn
Norton Zenger wrote:
>
> (Clue #1: Any "woman" who comes online and the first words out of her mouth
> woman who comes online and complains about how her breasts are asymmetrical?
> symmetrical breasts. Also, men pretending to be women do not menstruate.
> Ever.)
And they all have figures like a teen-age Barbie, without the resulting
back pain.
Lynn
Brian G (Upstairs)
called ladies were having a girls night, and it appears they were taking it
in turns on dodgy web sites with chatrooms to see who could get the men to
send pictures of their dicks, and adding up the scores.
I imagine drink had been taken judging by the shrieks every so often. Still
harmless fun and safe i guess, as long as you don't piss off someone who you
might know, or who knows you!
Brian who finds sitting in his garden often educational.
--
--
___________________________________________________________________________
I hope I grow on you....
I'm a Fungi!!!
Blind User, no pictures please!
mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk
___________________________________________________________________________
"TyMeDwn1st" <tymed...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:0995o2lmesp64t5vq...@4ax.com...
Troia
> SilverOz come on down:
>
>> In soc.subculture.bondage-bdsm on Fri, 15 Dec 2006 01:16:03 -0500
>> Norton Zenger <rusho...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>> IrishWinks come on down:
>>>> When answering personals ads from prospective partners, use ONLY a
>>>> one-line response. Avoid saying anything about yourself - MAKE the
>>>> other person go first.
>>> Also, if you're writing 100 people a day- which a lot of people browsing
>>> personals ads _do_- there's no point in making each message extremely detailed
>>> and personal, because odds are you won't hear back from 99 of them. Hell,
>> Which probably explains the ones I got. I wrote a detailed ad, and
>> got back a lot of "tell me more" emails. With those 3 words, perhaps
>> 2 or 3 more.
>>
>> Bitbucketed of course, so "write little cos you never get an answer"
>> is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
>
> first response, with no more than one or two points of possible interest about
> oneself, is I believe the best way.
It sure beats saying "I never get much of a response so I won't bother
to write more than one line to you, assuming you won't respond anyway."
Self-fulfilling prophecy.
>
>> There really does seem to be a certain belief out there in standing on
>> street corners saying "wanna fuck?"
>
> If one's standards are low enough, this actually works, so...
>
That may be the basis on which those I talked to did get responses to
the cock shots.
Or perhaps there really are women who are so obsessed.
For me, a cock is meaningless unless attached to a person with whom I
already have a relationship ... then, it's true, there may be some
pleasure in the view, but not because it's a cock, more because of who
it is attached to.
-- Troia
Brian Downstairs
Brian
--
I hope I grow on you...
I'm a Fungi!!!
Blindness is a way of life.
"Troia" <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote in message
news:4582efb7$0$97244$892e...@authen.yellow.readfreenews.net...
SilverOz
ah yes. The 44DD who is 5'8" and weighs 120.
SilverOz
SilverOz
Brian G (Upstairs) <mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote:
> It is of course also worrying that these ladies who have had dick pics sent
> to them, who say they are not interested, all kept these pics and knew where
> to find them when the subject came up.. erm maybe I needed to word that
> better...:-)
>
It's no so much that we kept them, it's just that a mailbox full of
dick pics is hard to forget.
Seen one you have laughed at them all really.
SilverOz
Lynn
SilverOz wrote:
> >
> > And they all have figures like a teen-age Barbie, without the resulting
> > back pain.
>
> ah yes. The 44DD who is 5'8" and weighs 120.
Ah, I see you've met her.
Lynn
Smiler
"Lynn" <socke...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:1166225865.7...@l12g2000cwl.googlegroups.com...
The idea of meeting a teenage Barbie seems inviting.
That is until I realise that breasts are the *only* sexual organs that
Barbie has.
Smiler
The godless one
Troia
(I mean the one that resides in the head.)
-- Troia
M. Shirley Chong
> The idea of meeting a teenage Barbie seems inviting.
> That is until I realise that breasts are the *only* sexual organs that
> Barbie has.
Keep in mind she doesn't even have nipples, just smooth breast
shaped mounds.
Shirley
Smiler
...critical sex organ...
Yeh. She's lacking a mouth :-)
Smiler
The godless one
fnordikins
>>
>> The idea of meeting a teenage Barbie seems inviting.
>> That is until I realise that breasts are the *only* sexual organs that
>> Barbie has.
>>
Lack of genitals is the curse of most nonbios.
Fnord, anatomically incorrect and enjoying the deprivation
IrishWinks
wrote:
>...critical sex organ...
>
>Yeh. She's lacking a mouth :-)
>
>Smiler
>The godless one
Umm, Barbie most certainly has always had one mouth. It's just
painted on - doesn't open and close (Barbie has no openings). There
was, however, a Barbie who talked. Scary stuff.
Winks
*Note email addy is munged. Correct email is irish...@bresnan.net
Troia
>
> Yeh. She's lacking a mouth :-)
>
> Smiler
> The godless one
>
>
Heh ... you are pretty sharp today, but she's not lacking a mouth, just
one that *opens* properly.
-- Troia
Troia
> On Sat, 16 Dec 2006 02:00:03 GMT, "Smiler" <Smi...@Joe.King.com>
> wrote:
>
>> ...critical sex organ...
>>
>> Yeh. She's lacking a mouth :-)
>>
>> Smiler
>> The godless one
>
> Umm, Barbie most certainly has always had one mouth. It's just
> painted on - doesn't open and close (Barbie has no openings). There
> was, however, a Barbie who talked. Scary stuff.
>
Well, yeah, because she just LUV'ed shopping and HATED math!
*sigh*
I wish I were making that up.
-- Troia
Markem
>"Troia" <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote
>> Smiler wrote:
>>> "Lynn" <socke...@aol.com> wrote
>>> SilverOz wrote:
>>>>>> And they all have figures like a teen-age Barbie, without the
>>>>>> resulting back pain.
>>>>> ah yes. The 44DD who is 5'8" and weighs 120.
>>>> Ah, I see you've met her.
>>> The idea of meeting a teenage Barbie seems inviting.
>>> That is until I realise that breasts are the *only* sexual organs that
>>> Barbie has.
>> Well, she certainly is lacking the most critical sex organ, anyway!
>> (I mean the one that resides in the head.)
>...critical sex organ...
>Yeh. She's lacking a mouth :-)
Ah there is always Realdoll.com, add in robotics..... Proper audio...
Ah the future...
Markem
(sixoneeight) = 618
Ruth Lawrence
"Markem" <markem(sixoneeight)@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7l27o2h8nuk9d99au...@4ax.com...
Think of it as evolution in action...
Ruth
Molly B
Need we mention "Growing-up Skipper" who sprouted breasts when you turned her
arm?
Molly B
Troia
No, let's not mention any such thing, please.
-- Troia
NightMist
Well, there were a few Barbies who took exception to that.
http://jacketmagazine.com/27/w-gilb.html
NightMist
because there is always somebody who thinks it's cute to call me
Barbie or Babs.
--
Come to the dark side.
We have cookies.
Troia
I just always wanted the Harley Davidson Barbie, none other.
-- Troia
darkn...@yahoo.com
> > Lynn wrote:
> >> IrishWinks wrote:
> >>> If you are going to use a pic in your profile, use a poorly lit
> >>> close-up of your penis - with hard-on, of course.
> >>
> >> <and other good stuff that I had to snip> I've heard so many people
> >> complain about this that once, I had to ask if they were really telling
> >> the truth. In response, I got multiple dick-pics. I'm still blown
> >> away, that anyone would think that was a good strategy.
Welcome to the male half of the human race. The social
misunderstandings are so legend, that I have become (half) convinced
there are genetic issues at work.
> >>
> >> Lynn
> >>
> > More than one guy has told me that about half the women who contact them
> > *like* it.
>
> Ummm...they may believe that. They may have been told that.
>
> I know almost no women who want dick shots right away.
Unless the guy is named Richard ;-).
I don't think I ever met, in my dating years, a woman who would want
shots of the male member, *ever* ;-).
darkn...@yahoo.com
Troia wrote:
> SilverOz wrote:
>
> > On the other hand I dunno if many women pose as men. I have done it
> > once for an experiment but not with the idea of getting into any
> > virtual female pants so no idea if there's similar tricks or similar
> > blind spots.
>
> In technical groups, it is not uncommon for women to post in a
> deliberately genderless fashion. One of the top Windows XP "MVP's" has
> a gender-neutral name and most people assume she is a he.
Thinking Andre Norton, a famous (woman) Fantasty and Sci Fi writer, who
for a long time was assumed to be male.
Or 'James Tiptree Junior' about whom a fascinating biography has just
been released.
http://www.amazon.com/James-Tiptree-Jr-Double-Sheldon/dp/0312203853
>
> On the other hand, in groups oriented to talk of sexuality, I doubt many
> women fake it.
As opposed to other contexts were women 'fake it' ;-)?
darkn...@yahoo.com
fnordikins wrote:
> Wanted: sub who will do absolutely whatever I want in exchange for nothing.
>
> OR
>
> Wanted: dom who will do absolutely whatever I want in exchange for nothing.
>
>
> Please send a blurry photo of your genitals (if any) your age, gender,
> shoe size, eye color, all bank account numbers, favorite color, weight,
> results of latest IQ test, and a $50 processing fee.
>
>
> Must be discrete.
Editor's comment:
discrete is a mathematical term, meaning countable (as in 'there are 3
eggs')
discreet is the actual spelling of the word meaning what we think it
means ie sensitive to private and personal information ie 'I asked him
to be discreet'
This can lead to lots of unintended hilarity. I used to read personal
ads and be tempted to reply with something like
'would continuous be acceptable'?
Sadly my humour was lost on many people ;-).
Markem
>> In technical groups, it is not uncommon for women to post in a
>> deliberately genderless fashion. One of the top Windows XP "MVP's" has
>> a gender-neutral name and most people assume she is a he.
Kelly is the best of them (help site wise). For me anyway.
Markem
(sixoneeight) = 618
fnordikins
>>
>> Must be discrete.
>
> Editor's comment:
>
> discrete is a mathematical term, meaning countable (as in 'there are 3
> eggs')
>
> discreet is the actual spelling of the word meaning what we think it
> means ie sensitive to private and personal information ie 'I asked him
> to be discreet'
>
> This can lead to lots of unintended hilarity. I used to read personal
> ads and be tempted to reply with something like
>
> 'would continuous be acceptable'?
>
> Sadly my humour was lost on many people ;-).
I know that. My hilarity was intentional.
As my lover once said :" no one's had any trouble telling me apart so far."
Ruth Lawrence
<darkn...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1166631410.3...@t46g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
>
> Ruth Lawrence wrote:
>> "Troia" <troia....@gmail.removethis.com> wrote in message
>> news:45821eae$0$97245$892e...@authen.yellow.readfreenews.net...
>> > Lynn wrote:
>> >> IrishWinks wrote:
>> >>> If you are going to use a pic in your profile, use a poorly lit
>> >>> close-up of your penis - with hard-on, of course.
>> >>
>> >> <and other good stuff that I had to snip> I've heard so many people
>> >> complain about this that once, I had to ask if they were really
>> >> telling
>> >> the truth. In response, I got multiple dick-pics. I'm still blown
>> >> away, that anyone would think that was a good strategy.
>
> Welcome to the male half of the human race. The social
> misunderstandings are so legend, that I have become (half) convinced
> there are genetic issues at work.
I didn't write that bit, but will say this: my experience in the scene gives
me the impression that there are fewer genetic differences than one would
otherwise suspect, but you see I am looking at it from a queer perspective.
>
>> >>
>> >> Lynn
>> >>
>> > More than one guy has told me that about half the women who contact
>> > them
>> > *like* it.
>>
>> Ummm...they may believe that. They may have been told that.
>>
>> I know almost no women who want dick shots right away.
>
> Unless the guy is named Richard ;-).
>
> I don't think I ever met, in my dating years, a woman who would want
> shots of the male member, *ever* ;-).
There are bound to be a few (UGOL), but I am not amongst them
Ruth
Troia
That would be the one I was referring to, too!
-- Troia
Troia
Had I made such a spelling error in an ad, had I posted an ad, a
response like that would be one of the first I'd, um, respond to.
(OK, that was another horrible sentence courtesy of my overworked mind.)
Since I have a teeny bit of brat in me (otherwise, I am thoroughly
well-behaved, docile and pleasing, sweetness personified) I sometimes
have played at "testing" the Domly types by making various sorts of
errors in my writing. I know that "testing" by a sub is frowned upon by
most, but I tend to want to be sure that if I'm going to give someone
authority over me, they can keep up with my
sometimes-unintentionally-sneaky mind that seems to want to find ways
around "bothersome" things, and often those who pick up on the spelling
trickery will be the sort that pay attention to detail at the level I
respond best to.
I know, I'm bad, subs are supposed to be willingly obedient subs at all
times ... but I do get along best with those who enjoy "challenging".
-- Troia
Troia
> Troia wrote:
>> SilverOz wrote:
>>
>>> On the other hand I dunno if many women pose as men. I have done it
>>> once for an experiment but not with the idea of getting into any
>>> virtual female pants so no idea if there's similar tricks or similar
>>> blind spots.
>> In technical groups, it is not uncommon for women to post in a
>> deliberately genderless fashion. One of the top Windows XP "MVP's" has
>> a gender-neutral name and most people assume she is a he.
>
> Thinking Andre Norton, a famous (woman) Fantasty and Sci Fi writer, who
> for a long time was assumed to be male.
I tend to forget that, but then again, I don't really read with the
author's gender in mind.
The one place I might agree re. gender-biased writing style is that it
seems to be a rare male writer who can really carry off writing erotica
as a female.
Even so, there are obvious exceptions.
-- Troia
Troia
struck me as the most gorgeous penis I'd ever seen or imagined. I might
actually have liked to have a pic of it.
For some reason, it just seemed *perfect*, though I can't quite explain
why; I could imagine someone making a sculpture of it, though.
-- Troia
fnordikins
>
> I know, I'm bad, subs are supposed to be willingly obedient subs at all
> times ... but I do get along best with those who enjoy "challenging".
Owning a willingly obedient wifwolf is too kinky even for me. I'd be
willing to try it, but I'm sure the wilfwolf I have is more fun.
Troia
Awww, you say the nicest things, dear fearsome Mistress Fnordy! Owner Sir.
*minor cavort*
and even a *silly grin*
-- Troia
Smiler
little girls being told by their mothers that a penis is 'dirty' and/or
'ugly'?
I can't imagine (UGOL?) a father telling his young son that the female
genitalia are ugly or dirty.
Even the law discriminates in recognition of this, here in the UK.
A man found walking naked in the street would be charged with Indecent
Exposure, whereas a woman in the same situation would be charged with
"Behaviour likely to cause a Breach of the Peace".
Smiler
The godless one
Smiler
There's one here who doesn't think that about you (She With A Rubber
Killfile)!
But SWARK's opinions don't count!
We all know that you're *usually* thoroughly well behaved, docile, pleasing
and sweetness personified.
If, at anytime, you're not all of those things, there are several here who
are ready and willing to 'correct your errors'.
Smiler,
The godless one
Troia
> ...
> We all know that you're *usually* thoroughly well behaved, docile, pleasing
> and sweetness personified.
Of course, I won't ask about your exact definition of "usually" here,
and I'll even manage to say Thank You without being wicked about it.
(See, I can too behave!)
> If, at anytime, you're not all of those things, there are several here who
> are ready and willing to 'correct your errors'.
Yes, I know, people are so *good* to me!
Ahhhhh ........
-- Troia
(having a bit of a better day day, and feeling blessed)
Ruth Lawrence
"Troia" wrote in message
> I know, I'm bad, subs are supposed to be willingly obedient subs at all
> times ... but I do get along best with those who enjoy "challenging".
I'm not addressing you in particular Troia, but not *my* subs: I'm looking
for someone original, intelligent and amusing, not a flesh puppet.
That said, real resistance would be a turnoff for me.
Ruth, nibbling away at stereotypes here and elsewhere today
Troia
IMO, when you reach down deeper beyond playing a role (which I realize
is not your thing, Ruth) it's a rare sub/slave of spirit who can manage
no real resistance ever. It's a club that many use to beat themselves
over the head with: "Why am I not perfect in my submission? Why do I
feel this way, when I so much want my Dom to be happy?"
I think a wise and caring sort of Dom will not allow a sub to be
self-defeating when those times come, but will help to manage them in a
way that makes sense between the two parties.
I do seem to see more consistent submission-without-resistance from male
subs, and sometimes suspect that hormones play a role here. For
example, for those women for whom PMS means at least a bit of
"moodiness" and discomfort ... just where do you put those feelings if
you are a sub/slave to someone 24x7? Sometimes you can subsume them in
deep submission, but it's not uncommon to need some help doing so or
managing the inner conflict.
It doesn't mean one doesn't want overall to submit, in fact one may have
the desire but emotions can win the day.
I've seen so many subs question this part of themselves, as if we were
meant to be perfect instead of human. It is one thing to strive for
perfection of submission, quite another to think it is achievable over
the long-term.
Then again ... there are those who enjoy seemless, non-disturbing, easy
dominance. Clearly someone who requires such perfection would be highly
unsatisfied with me, since I do have my "moments", both for fun and
those where I have real doubts and have therefore ceded certain rights
so that my rampant rebellions can be reined in as needed.
IOW, sometimes the interaction with a Dom can keep me more calm & steady
than I might otherwise be, when emotional intensity takes over and quiet
submission seems impossible to achieve. It is, for me, part of the
balance and peace I get out of the bargain ... and a whole lot more
effective than therapy or drugs!
Or ... perhaps we have different ideas about what constitutes "real
resistance", once one gets to the point past consent.
-- Troia
Ruth Lawrence
> Ruth Lawrence wrote:
>> "Troia" wrote in message
>>
>>> I know, I'm bad, subs are supposed to be willingly obedient subs at all
>>> times ... but I do get along best with those who enjoy "challenging".
>>
>> I'm not addressing you in particular Troia, but not *my* subs: I'm
>> looking for someone original, intelligent and amusing, not a flesh
>> puppet.
>>
>> That said, real resistance would be a turnoff for me.
>>
>> Ruth, nibbling away at stereotypes here and elsewhere today
>
> IMO, when you reach down deeper beyond playing a role (which I realize is
> not your thing, Ruth)
It can be.
>it's a rare sub/slave of spirit who can manage no real resistance ever.
Well, I'm a reasonable person. I don't want to force folks to act out of
character.
>.It's a club that many use to beat themselves over the head with: "Why am
>I not perfect in my submission? Why do I feel this way, when I so much
>want my Dom to be happy?"
I have been put in that position myself.
> I think a wise and caring sort of Dom will not allow a sub to be
> self-defeating when those times come, but will help to manage them in a
> way that makes sense between the two parties.
Well, yes, but I rather think that plenty of subs are not 24/7: likely the
majority.
>
> I do seem to see more consistent submission-without-resistance from male
> subs, and sometimes suspect that hormones play a role here.
I see male subs suck a lot of stuff up in the hope of eventually getting
what they want...but it all ends in tears quite often!
>For example, for those women for whom PMS means at least a bit of
>"moodiness" and discomfort ... just where do you put those feelings if you
>are a sub/slave to someone 24x7? Sometimes you can subsume them in deep
>submission, but it's not uncommon to need some help doing so or managing
>the inner conflict.
What do subs or switches do who do not have doms, eh?
We like to pretend our stuff is real, but we live in a really Real world
where we cannot maintain our illusions all the time.
As a switch I'm not even going to pretend I will do 24/7 submission.
I want some sort of agreed signal that the stuff has begun, that it has
ended.
*Plenty* of kinksters behave the way I would prefer.
> It doesn't mean one doesn't want overall to submit, in fact one may have
> the desire but emotions can win the day.
Yes.
> I've seen so many subs question this part of themselves, as if we were
> meant to be perfect instead of human. It is one thing to strive for
> perfection of submission, quite another to think it is achievable over the
> long-term.
::nods::
I've seen quite a few subs succumb to certain doms' ideal that they should
be always submissive. In my view such doms do many subs a great disservice.
> Then again ... there are those who enjoy seemless, non-disturbing, easy
> dominance.
Yup, I know a couple, hence my 'flesh puppets' remark earlier.
> Clearly someone who requires such perfection would be highly unsatisfied
> with me, since I do have my "moments", both for fun and those where I have
> real doubts and have therefore ceded certain rights so that my rampant
> rebellions can be reined in as needed.
:::nods:::
> IOW, sometimes the interaction with a Dom can keep me more calm & steady >
> than I might otherwise be, when emotional intensity takes over and quiet
> submission seems impossible to achieve.
I am quieter and more steady when I act on my kinks, at either end of d/s or
without emotional power exchange.
> It is, for me, part of the balance and peace I get out of the bargain ...
> and a whole lot more effective than therapy or drugs!
I can see that, I think.
> Or ... perhaps we have different ideas about what constitutes "real
> resistance", once one gets to the point past consent.
Yes. I should have defined my term: I do not want a submissive who fights
me all the time over clearly negotiated things.
I'm not a hard dom, mind you.
Ruth
darkn...@yahoo.com
I'm the sort of bloke who can cheerfully type 'wood of' when he meant
'would have' so you can see why these things cause me amusement ;-).
darkn...@yahoo.com
Smiler wrote:
> >
> Do you think this difference is down to genetics or conditioning, like
> little girls being told by their mothers that a penis is 'dirty' and/or
> 'ugly'?
> I can't imagine (UGOL?) a father telling his young son that the female
> genitalia are ugly or dirty.
> Even the law discriminates in recognition of this, here in the UK.
> A man found walking naked in the street would be charged with Indecent
> Exposure, whereas a woman in the same situation would be charged with
> "Behaviour likely to cause a Breach of the Peace".
Steven Pinker 'The Blank Slate'
A lot more of us, down to our political and religious beliefs, is
genetic rather than environmental.
Add to that, the latest thinking on developmental psychology is that
the key influence is *our peer group* rather than our *parents*.
So our parents make 2 (3) very important choices for us:
- they give us their genes
- they choose our playmates, by choosing where to live and where to go
to school for us
- they don't overtly eff us up (or they do) particularly during the
first 5 years eg by physical abuse
Which is far, far less than traditional societal attitudes and
approaches suggest.
And, as Pinker points out, causes real problems for both conservative
and liberal political ideologies.
M. Shirley Chong
> In the case of one's parents, how exactly does one differentiate between
> genetic and environmental influence? I mean, how does one determine that,
> say, having the same values as one's parents is down to genetic predisposition
> rather than having those values drilled into them throughout their childhood?
I don't know the answer but if I were looking for it, I'd be looking
at adoptees whose birth parents are known. Survey parents, offspring
and birth parents and see where the differences fall.
Shirley