Nondefined structure
Tobie
relationship. They were wanting him to define it for them.
Just about all he could do was assert that he wasn't a slave, and he
wasn't owned.
We've never tried to define it in current yet ever changing kink terms
to fit the masses. He submits to me. He can say no if he wants to.
I'll generally do what I want to do any way, and he'll generally
say...see what saying no got me?
I listen to tone of course.
I watch his eyes and for his own small signs of personal discomfort
with a given situation.
I try to be reasonable, unless I'm playing SDS on him.
He's got the option of opting out of anything at any time, all he has
to do is safeout.
I say he's mine, he says he's mine, past that there is no set
structure or protocol. It just doesn't seem to be needed.
Tobie
The Dip in the Dip Corps
SSBB Diplomatic Corps
Portland Oregon
Ruth Lawrence
"Tobie" <mizte...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:c8lsn29kduedv06m1...@4ax.com...
>A couple of folks were chatting with Philip this evening about our
> relationship. They were wanting him to define it for them.
uh-huh...
> Just about all he could do was assert that he wasn't a slave, and he
> wasn't owned.
> We've never tried to define it in current yet ever changing kink terms
> to fit the masses.
Me, I think that's a Good Thing.
Should we be playing for ouselves, or some imaginary powers that be?
>He submits to me. He can say no if he wants to.
> I'll generally do what I want to do any way, and he'll generally
> say...see what saying no got me?
> I listen to tone of course.
> I watch his eyes and for his own small signs of personal discomfort
> with a given situation.
This is clear from your reports :-)
> I try to be reasonable, unless I'm playing SDS on him.
> He's got the option of opting out of anything at any time, all he has
> to do is safeout.
> I say he's mine, he says he's mine, past that there is no set
> structure or protocol. It just doesn't seem to be needed.
To me, that's very refreshing.
There are winds of change, but my own Scene down here is too
small, and thus tends to be conformist and judgemental in parts.
Ruth IMO etc etc
Brian G (Upstairs)
for memory or something. Some say, if you can define something exactly, all
the fun goes out of it.
Brian
--
--
___________________________________________________________________________
I hope I grow on you....
I'm a Fungi!!!
Blind User, no pictures please!
mildew...@blueyonder.co.uk
___________________________________________________________________________
"Tobie" <mizte...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:c8lsn29kduedv06m1...@4ax.com...
Tobie
We like to catagorize and define. We like to keep things in a
perspective that we can easliy understand.
I'm not one that likes being boxed though.
I don't mind labels, if they fit and if they're accurate. But in kink
there is the common deal of having set relationship patterns and
easily defined structures.
Tobie
Tobie
<curly...@optusnet.com.au> wrote:
>Should we be playing for ouselves, or some imaginary powers that be?
I think a lot of us still look for a ladder to climb. X, is *more* X
than Y or Z so I'm an X. I'mmore a slave than you are, I'm more
sadistic than you are, I'm a loving dominant and you aren't. I have no
limits and you do...blahblahblah.
Will we ever get past that? Nope, I don't think so.
Tobie
Stephanie Moore-Fuller
My G-d, the horror!
You've made things work for *you*!
Congratulations. Seriously.
If people need a label, let them cut it out of their own darn clothing.
Geez.
stephanie
--
Stephanie Moore-Fuller smoo...@blackrose.org Mountain View, CA, USA
"Chance is the path God takes when he wishes to remain anonymous."
-- Albert Einstein
Ruth Lawrence
> On Tue, 12 Dec 2006 19:17:16 +1100, "Ruth Lawrence"
> <curly...@optusnet.com.au> wrote:
>
>>Should we be playing for ouselves, or some imaginary powers that be?
>
> I think a lot of us still look for a ladder to climb. X, is *more* X
> than Y or Z so I'm an X. I'mmore a slave than you are, I'm more
> sadistic than you are, I'm a loving dominant and you aren't. I have no
> limits and you do...blahblahblah.
:::rolls eyes:::
> Will we ever get past that? Nope, I don't think so.
Some won't. I don't feel like granting them credence.
Ruth
Tobie
<smoo...@petal.blackrose.org> wrote:
>Congratulations. Seriously.
Thank you.
>
>If people need a label, let them cut it out of their own darn clothing.
Well look at SWSNBN, that is a classic example of someone wanting so
badly to fit their percieved mold that they'll latch on to ANY label
that comes along, even if it's only for a few hours.
In the last couple of months she's hit every common dynamic label that
we use and she's never even done *any* BDSM.
Tobie