There's something evil in my house
Dawn O' The Dead
lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
inside it.
As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
Tonight when I'm sleeping something horrible is going to happen, I
just know it. I'm going awaken tied to the bed with dental floss as
they gather a round me, jabbing me with straight pins. Or something.
Dawn
(and me late for deadline)
--------------
"You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world but
they won't always bring you lasagna at work. Most of them just
cheat on you." - Silent Bob, 'Clerks'
Deborah Dowdell
> There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
> lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
> nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
> inside it.
>
> As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
> knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
> my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
> this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
> one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
> and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
>
> Tonight when I'm sleeping something horrible is going to happen, I
> just know it. I'm going awaken tied to the bed with dental floss as
> they gather a round me, jabbing me with straight pins. Or something.
>
> Dawn
> (and me late for deadline)
>
> --------------
... well, unless your real name is not Dawn and it is "Gulliver" I don`t
think you need to worry! :-)
Actually, I would bet you have a squirrel or two, going to work making a
niffty little home up there. My parents had the same trouble with squirrels
a few years ago. Entering the garage, climbing the ceiling beams in the
garage and making their way to the joint where the house and garage roof
meet, they ate their way thru the wood and began a building fest, to rival
the best construction workers. Dad spent months, nearly a year, trying to
get rid of the cute, cuddly... "vermin" as he calls them. In the end dad won
the battle. He nailed several pieces of steel sheeting around the hole
and sealed that with cememnt. Unfortunately, dad did it while at least one
squirrel was still inside. The noises took several days to stop... :-(
Dad is a critter killer!
Debbie
-------------
--
D.Dowdell
Bezel
Dawn O' The Dead <java...@pacifier.com> wrote:
>There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
>lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
>nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
>inside it.
>
>As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
>knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
>my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
>this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
>one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
>and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
Eeek.
Well, on the off chance it's not malevolent dwarves, or horrors ripping
their way through to our dimension from another nastier one, or
something else of that sort, it might be bees. We have a kind of small
bumblebee around here that nests in wood, and it sounds something
like this with a little buzzing mixed in. For little insects, they
make an incredible amount of noise, and it does sound a bit like a
minature construction team.
Granted, they're not exactly nice (they're much more aggressive than
the big placid bumblebees I'm used to) but they're not malevolent
dwarves.
--Bezel (or so they tell me when they
buzz in my ear at night)
skubis...@eisner.decus.org
>There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
>lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
>nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
>inside it.
>
>As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
>knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
>my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
>this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
>one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
>and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
It's just rats... yeah, rats... it's certainly not, um, Satan!
Actually, it's probably either field mice or squirrels.
Squirrels are very hard to get rid of, sorry to say.
Set up a few tempting mouse traps with peanut butter on top
of your frig. You'll know soon enough if it's mice or
worse.
Rose
Dawn O' The Dead
>Eeek.
>
>Well, on the off chance it's not malevolent dwarves, or horrors ripping
>their way through to our dimension from another nastier one, or
>something else of that sort, it might be bees. We have a kind of small
>bumblebee around here that nests in wood, and it sounds something
>like this with a little buzzing mixed in. For little insects, they
>make an incredible amount of noise, and it does sound a bit like a
>minature construction team.
I went back out with the broom a few minutes ago and pounded again.
Then I went down a few steps and looked up at the hole in the corner
where the birds enter to nest.
I saw a big furry tail.
I yelled, "Hey!" and a squirrel poked his head out and looked at me,
very thoughtfully. I pounded with the broom again and - I swear - he
*rolled his eyes* and ducked back inside.
He is my nemesis.
Dawn
(getting waaaaaaay behind deadline)
Brock Hannibal
> There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
> lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
> nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
> inside it.
>
> As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
> knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
> my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
> this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
> one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
> and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
>
> Tonight when I'm sleeping something horrible is going to happen, I
> just know it. I'm going awaken tied to the bed with dental floss as
> they gather a round me, jabbing me with straight pins. Or something.
>
> Dawn
> (and me late for deadline)
Could be a squirrel, or maybe bats in your belfry or worst case
RATS!
--
Brock
"The greatest thing, you will ever learn, is to love and be loved in
return."
Warren Cheney
Dead) wrote:
[delivered in shaky whisper, background noises of wind and
shutters banging against window]
>There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
>lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
>nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
>inside it.
[cue theme from "Jaws"]
>As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
>knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
>my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
[breathless pause, sound of thunder in background]
>this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
>one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
>and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
[cue shrieking violins]
[voice rises in mounting terror]
>Tonight when I'm sleeping something horrible is going to happen, I
>just know it. I'm going awaken tied to the bed with dental floss as
>they gather a round me, jabbing me with straight pins.
[lapses into mallspeak]
>Or something.
[bloodcurdling scream, loud crash of thunder, five seconds of silence]
[cue accordion playing "Roll Out The Barrel"]
SIGN UP NOW! SEE IT TONIGHT!! ON DAWNCAM!
That's right, we've gone to absolutely no expense to install
several hidden cameras (cleverly disguised as squirrels) at Dawn's
house. We're dedicated to giving you the finest views of Dawn
as she posts to Usenet, drinks coffee and makes hot monkey love!
Or was that hot chocolate? Or Chunky Monkey? Whatever! YOU SEE
IT ALL!
For only $29.95 per month, you'll be front row center watching
her breastesses bounce as she jumps up and down screaming prolific
obscenities at our little animatronic tree rats while we collect
enough of your hard-earned money to live lavishly in tropic
resort islands for the rest of our lives! And remember, if we're
not TOTALLY SATISFIED with your money, WE'LL GIVE IT BACK! And
THAT'S 100% GUARANTEED!!
HOW CAN YOU LOSE?
OK, so maybe that should be HOW CAN WE LOSE?
Stay home happy!
-----Warren (OK, so it's really Tokeman fleshing out his new digs)
Mel and Cori, singing a duet of summer peace and love:
"...the only one for me is you, and you for me,
so happy togetherrrrr...NOT!"
Warren Cheney Can't stand spam? http://www.cauce.org
Annette M. Stroud
Warren Cheney <offc...@worldnet.att.net> wrote:
>-----Warren (OK, so it's really Tokeman fleshing out his new digs)
I always pictured him as more a basement type.
Annette (Don't scare her like that.)
Graydon
> Actually, it's probably either field mice or squirrels.
> Squirrels are very hard to get rid of, sorry to say.
Squirrels are _easy_ to get rid of.
You go to your local trapper supply store -- this may take some
finding -- and get a bottle of mink or fisher musk. Sog the locality
the squirrels are threatening to inhabit. Nail it up with something
non-chewable -- stainless steel roof flashing is good -- and problem
solved.
If you can get an actual fisher or mink or suchlike from your local
rent-a-weasel, even better, but the musk is generally reliable.
--
graydon@ |The Human Dress is forged Iron, The Human Form a fiery Forge,
lara. |The Human Face a Furnace seal'd, The Human Heart its
on.ca |hungry Gorge. -- from Wllm. Blake, "A Divine Image", 1794
Charles R Martin
Graydon wrote:
>
> <skubis...@Eisner.DECUS.Org> scripsit:
> > Actually, it's probably either field mice or squirrels.
> > Squirrels are very hard to get rid of, sorry to say.
>
> Squirrels are _easy_ to get rid of.
>
mink musk.... ]
> If you can get an actual fisher or mink or suchlike from your local
> rent-a-weasel,
I will admit that finding a local rent-a-weasle may be harder.
--
I can only please one person per day.
Today is not your day.
Tomorrow doesn't look good either.
Charles R Martin * Superior, CO * 80027
Mark Jones
Bezel wrote:
> In article <379d386d....@news.pacifier.com>,
> Dawn O' The Dead <java...@pacifier.com> wrote:
> >There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
> >lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
> >nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
> >inside it.
> >
> >As I sit here, I can hear it. Scraping, crunching, tearing, pulling,
> >knocking. It's as if small people are doing construction work inside
> >my porch roof. Birds nesting I can handle just fine. But oh, this -
> >this sounds as if elves are ripping up chunks of wood. If I knock on
> >one of the posts or pound with a broom handle I can hear them scramble
> >and quiet down. Then ten minutes later it starts again ...
>
> Eeek.
>
> Well, on the off chance it's not malevolent dwarves, or horrors ripping
> their way through to our dimension from another nastier one, or
> something else of that sort, it might be bees. We have a kind of small
> bumblebee around here that nests in wood, and it sounds something
> like this with a little buzzing mixed in. For little insects, they
> make an incredible amount of noise, and it does sound a bit like a
> minature construction team.
>
> Granted, they're not exactly nice (they're much more aggressive than
> the big placid bumblebees I'm used to) but they're not malevolent
> dwarves.
Speak for yourself. I have a phobia about stinging insects. Malevolent
dwarves I can deal with--dangerous, perhaps, but I can remain rational
while enduring their attacks. The thought of a big nest of bees inside the
walls of my house, on the other hand, gives me to creeps (and a major case
of the Screaming Flailing Dance of Terror when they show themselves).
--
Mark Jones
When Sir Robert Peel proposed to organize the police force of London,
Englishmen said openly that half a dozen throats cut in Whitechapel
every year would be a cheap price to pay for keeping such an instrument
of tyranny out of the State's hands. We are all beginning to realize
now that there is a great deal to be said for that view of the matter.
-- Albert Jay Nock (1935)
Graydon
>
> Graydon wrote:
> >
> > <skubis...@Eisner.DECUS.Org> scripsit:
> > > Actually, it's probably either field mice or squirrels.
> > > Squirrels are very hard to get rid of, sorry to say.
> >
> > Squirrels are _easy_ to get rid of.
> >
> [ short description in which "easy" includes finding bottled
> mink musk.... ]
You could get mink, beaver, coyote, wolf, black bear, martin -- which
is the really good one for squirrels -- fisher, and deer in half litre
bottles in the Perth Co-Op when I was a kid; haven't been in there for
a long while now, but it's not a difficult thing to find in a rural
area, at least in Ontario.
> > If you can get an actual fisher or mink or suchlike from your local
> > rent-a-weasel,
>
> I will admit that finding a local rent-a-weasle may be harder.
If you've got a friend who keeps ferrets, the ferrets might be
delighted to terrorize some squirrels.
Bezel
Mark Jones <sin...@pacifier.com> wrote:
>
>Bezel wrote:
<mysterious noises in Dawn's house, since unmasked as a squirrel's
remodeling efforts>
>> Well, on the off chance it's not malevolent dwarves, or horrors ripping
>> their way through to our dimension from another nastier one, or
>> something else of that sort, it might be bees. We have a kind of small
>> bumblebee around here that nests in wood, and it sounds something
>> like this with a little buzzing mixed in. For little insects, they
>> make an incredible amount of noise, and it does sound a bit like a
>> minature construction team.
>>
>> Granted, they're not exactly nice (they're much more aggressive than
>> the big placid bumblebees I'm used to) but they're not malevolent
>> dwarves.
>
>Speak for yourself. I have a phobia about stinging insects. Malevolent
>dwarves I can deal with--dangerous, perhaps, but I can remain rational
>while enduring their attacks. The thought of a big nest of bees inside the
>walls of my house, on the other hand, gives me to creeps (and a major case
>of the Screaming Flailing Dance of Terror when they show themselves).
Although the bees I was talking about primarily work on the shed here,
I did once live in a house that had a huge yellow jacket nest in the
walls. We didn't find out how huge until I finally got stung in bed one
night, after which my father paid someone to come rip out the walls and
evict the wasps - we were told it was five feet across. Just another
wonderful part of the Year We Lived In Delmar.
I once saw an episode of Rescue 911 in which the crash of a tractor-
trailer was complicated by the fact that the truck had been carrying
honeybee hives, so that the accident site was blanketed by many, many
highly peeved bees. The rescue and cleanup effort did not look like
anyone's idea of a good time.
Anyway, I grant you your phobia, but I tend to think I'm smarter than
insects (even hive ones) while malevolent dwarves might well have access
to resources greater than my own.
--Bezel
Warren Cheney
wrote:
>Graydon wrote:
>>
>> <skubis...@Eisner.DECUS.Org> scripsit:
>> > Actually, it's probably either field mice or squirrels.
>> > Squirrels are very hard to get rid of, sorry to say.
>>
>> Squirrels are _easy_ to get rid of.
>>
> [ short description in which "easy" includes finding bottled
> mink musk.... ]
>
>> If you can get an actual fisher or mink or suchlike from your local
>> rent-a-weasel,
>
>I will admit that finding a local rent-a-weasle may be harder.
Not to mention dealing with how pissed off the little darlings
get after being painted in U-Haul orange...
-----Warren ("but noooo, they told me it was a temp job, and THEN...")
Dawn O' The Dead
Maybe I could just get a couple of my ex's to visit for the weekend.
Dawn
(thank yew I'll be here all week)
Dawn O' The Dead
wrote:
<sneef>
Too late.
Dawn
(may I say eew?)
Charles R Martin
Graydon wrote:
>
> Charles R Martin <crma...@iglobal.net> scripsit:
> >
> > Graydon wrote:
> > >
> > > <skubis...@Eisner.DECUS.Org> scripsit:
> > > > Actually, it's probably either field mice or squirrels.
> > > > Squirrels are very hard to get rid of, sorry to say.
> > >
> > > Squirrels are _easy_ to get rid of.
> > >
> > [ short description in which "easy" includes finding bottled
> > mink musk.... ]
>
> You could get mink, beaver, coyote, wolf, black bear, martin -- which
> is the really good one for squirrels -- fisher, and deer in half litre
> bottles in the Perth Co-Op when I was a kid; haven't been in there for
> a long while now, but it's not a difficult thing to find in a rural
> area, at least in Ontario.
I will admit that Martin musk is rather easier for me to find.
Mark Jones
Bezel wrote:
> In article <378B6ED6...@pacifier.com>,
> Mark Jones <sin...@pacifier.com> wrote:
> >
> >Speak for yourself. I have a phobia about stinging insects. Malevolent
> >dwarves I can deal with--dangerous, perhaps, but I can remain rational
> >while enduring their attacks. The thought of a big nest of bees inside the
> >walls of my house, on the other hand, gives me to creeps (and a major case
> >of the Screaming Flailing Dance of Terror when they show themselves).
>
> Although the bees I was talking about primarily work on the shed here,
> I did once live in a house that had a huge yellow jacket nest in the
> walls. We didn't find out how huge until I finally got stung in bed one
> night, after which my father paid someone to come rip out the walls and
> evict the wasps - we were told it was five feet across. Just another
> wonderful part of the Year We Lived In Delmar.
Allow me to just say, "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!"
> I once saw an episode of Rescue 911 in which the crash of a tractor-
> trailer was complicated by the fact that the truck had been carrying
> honeybee hives, so that the accident site was blanketed by many, many
> highly peeved bees. The rescue and cleanup effort did not look like
> anyone's idea of a good time.
>
> Anyway, I grant you your phobia, but I tend to think I'm smarter than
> insects (even hive ones) while malevolent dwarves might well have access
> to resources greater than my own.
I'm smarter than insects too (he said modestly), but their presence tends to
impede my thinking.
Malevolent dwarves, on the other hand, are an opponent about which I can remain
rational.
--
Mark Jones
ant...@pobox.com
:> Dawn O' The Dead <java...@pacifier.com> wrote:
:> >There's a space over the back porch of my house, between the flat
:> >lower roof and the slope up to the second floor. I know that birds
:> >nest in there, but today, I swear, something horrible is happening
:> >inside it.
:> Well, on the off chance it's not malevolent dwarves, or horrors ripping
:> their way through to our dimension from another nastier one, or
:> something else of that sort, it might be bees. We have a kind of small
:> bumblebee around here that nests in wood, and it sounds something
:> like this with a little buzzing mixed in. For little insects, they
:> make an incredible amount of noise, and it does sound a bit like a
:> minature construction team.
:>
:> Granted, they're not exactly nice (they're much more aggressive than
:> the big placid bumblebees I'm used to) but they're not malevolent
:> dwarves.
: Speak for yourself. I have a phobia about stinging insects. Malevolent
: dwarves I can deal with--dangerous, perhaps, but I can remain rational
: while enduring their attacks. The thought of a big nest of bees inside the
: walls of my house, on the other hand, gives me to creeps (and a major case
: of the Screaming Flailing Dance of Terror when they show themselves).
For me, it's wasps and spiders. Especially spiders. I get a "kill or flee"
reaction.
The Roomie From Hell got bit on the arm by a spider the other day. He know
has a dime-sized bruise with a pinprick-sized hole in the center. We're
pretty certain it was a brown recluse. I'm hoping that a certain spider he
found in his bed one night and killed was the perpetrator. The alternative
is that it is still on the loose somewhere. Ugh!
Kinda brought it on himself, though. He is an absolute slob (his room is a
spider's paradise) and likes to keep his window wide open 24/7, even
knowing that the outside of the house has a spider problem at the moment.
(Not too hot for security reasons, either.) I've smooshed black widows,
brown recluses, dirt spiders, and seen black fuzzy "jumping spiders".
Fortunately, I've not found any in the house, apart from his one
encounter. I try to run the vacuum around often and run the broom under
and around the furniture, so hopefully they're staying outside, away from
the activity.
I did observe that he picked up his laundry today and had the window
closed. Maybe the situation is sinking in. Lucky for him it was likely a
young'un. I've heard the adults' bites are much more dangerous.
This has been a bad summer for bugs, in any event. Grasshoppers got my
cabbages and aphids infested the cherry tree. The tomatoes are doing well,
though. ("Miracle-Gro" really seems to work. I'm astonished!) All in all,
I feel like I'm in a "living forest".
Antryg - Taking bids from exterminators.
--
ant...@pobox.com - "Everyone should have a sig quote. This one is mine."
http://www.pobox.com/~antryg (sadly outdated)
ant...@pobox.com
[evicting squirrels...]
: If you've got a friend who keeps ferrets, the ferrets might be
: delighted to terrorize some squirrels.
*laugh* Sooo true! A friend of mine has a ferret named "Minx" who has only
one eye. (She tried sniffing a lit cigarette while still at the pet
store.) Her personality is such that we joke about getting her a pirate's
eyepatch. I can very easily imagine her tormenting a squirrel.
She also reminds me of Dogbert (of the Dilbert comic strip) quite a bit.
If she had hands, I'm sure she'd try to become Supreme High Leader of the
World. Fortunately, doorknobs still frustrate her. You can tell she knows
how they work; she just hasn't figured out how to turn them...yet.
Antryg - Suddenly feeling the urge to see the Black Footed Ferrets at the
zoo.
ant...@pobox.com
[noises]
: Could be a squirrel, or maybe bats in your belfry or worst case
: RATS!
I discovered the other day that a bat is living somewhere nearby. I caught
a glimpse of it right about dusk as it flew by on its way to its preferred
feeding site.
Perhaps I should build a bathouse for the eaves.
Antryg - I think bats are cute. But I think mice are cute, too.
Mark Jones
ant...@pobox.com wrote:
> Mark Jones <sin...@pacifier.com> wrote:
> : Speak for yourself. I have a phobia about stinging insects. Malevolent
> : dwarves I can deal with--dangerous, perhaps, but I can remain rational
> : while enduring their attacks. The thought of a big nest of bees inside the
> : walls of my house, on the other hand, gives me to creeps (and a major case
> : of the Screaming Flailing Dance of Terror when they show themselves).
>
> For me, it's wasps and spiders. Especially spiders. I get a "kill or flee"
> reaction.
Friend of mine has the same spider phobia. When we roomed together for about
three years, between us we were capable of dealing with one another's respective
phobias. A great example of symbiosis...or co-dependence.
> The Roomie From Hell got bit on the arm by a spider the other day. He know
> has a dime-sized bruise with a pinprick-sized hole in the center. We're
> pretty certain it was a brown recluse. I'm hoping that a certain spider he
> found in his bed one night and killed was the perpetrator. The alternative
> is that it is still on the loose somewhere. Ugh!
Yarg. I got a spider bite recently. Well, we assume it was a spider bite--all
we know for sure is that it was a bite of some kind on my toe. I didn't notice
when it happened--only that it started itching like mad and then began swelling
overnight. Got infected and my whole foot swelled up. I got to take a trip to
the emergency room and get an IV of super-duper antibiotics and a prescription
for pills, too. Doctor told me, "come back in three days--or sooner if red
streaks develop on your leg."
THAT was comforting. Fortunately it worked. Still have all my toes and
everything! Anyone who whines about the awful effects of science and technology
on Mother Earth can kiss my shiny metal ass. This is at least twice now that
such things have kept me from departing this earth prematurely.
--
Mark Jones
"The trouble with you, Val, is that you never plan ahead. Here it is Monday, and
I'm already thinking about Wednesday."
--Earl (Fred Ward) to Val (Kevin Bacon) in TREMORS
Dawn O' The Dead
wrote:
>ant...@pobox.com wrote:
>> For me, it's wasps and spiders. Especially spiders. I get a "kill or flee"
>> reaction.
>
>Friend of mine has the same spider phobia. When we roomed together for about
>three years, between us we were capable of dealing with one another's respective
>phobias. A great example of symbiosis...or co-dependence.
Yeah, well, now he's living with me - and I have the same terror of
Flying Stinging Things as you do, so the co-dependence still works
beautifully. I catch and release the spiders while he shrinks in
horror. Then he handles situations like last night where I cower in
bed and shriek, "What do you mean it's a *wasp*?!! GET IT OUT!
GETITOUTGETITOUTGETITOUTGETITOUT!!!!"
Dawn
Tony Quirke
> Malevolent dwarves, on the other hand, are an opponent about which I
> can remain rational.
You've never run into Markov Chaney then ?
- Tony Q.
--
FEC records, analyzed by the non-partisan Center for Responsive Politics,
show that in federal elections, the candidate with the most cash wins over
90% of the time. And in the wide majority of cases, the winning candidate
has over 10 times as much money as the closest competitor. - Bob Harris
Cinderella
>wrote:
>
>>ant...@pobox.com wrote:
>
>>> For me, it's wasps and spiders. Especially spiders. I get a "kill or flee"
>>> reaction.
>>
>>Friend of mine has the same spider phobia. When we roomed together for about
>>three years, between us we were capable of dealing with one another's respective
>>phobias. A great example of symbiosis...or co-dependence.
>
>Yeah, well, now he's living with me - and I have the same terror of
>Flying Stinging Things as you do, so the co-dependence still works
>beautifully. I catch and release the spiders while he shrinks in
>horror. Then he handles situations like last night where I cower in
>bed and shriek, "What do you mean it's a *wasp*?!! GET IT OUT!
>GETITOUTGETITOUTGETITOUTGETITOUT!!!!"
>
being at my sisters house one day. She turns towards me and screams and
flails whilst flinging some large black thing with eight legs at me. I
promptly
1)screamed
2)pee'd my pants (just a little)
3)tried to make another door through her husband.
It was all for nothing. The large black thing with eight legs was also
made out of rubber and though looked menacing the only damage done was to
my pride. Well, my sister and her husband hurt for days after the laugh
they had at my expense.
Cinderella, one of these days...
--
"Do I look like a beautiful blonde with big tits and an ass
that tastes like French Vanilla ice cream to you?" True Romance
EDD 12/24/97 tbtw#18, Wineboink III
sunbird
> My phobia is definitely of the arachnid variety. Brings up a memory of
> being at my sisters house one day. She turns towards me and screams and
> flails whilst flinging some large black thing with eight legs at me. I
> promptly
> 1)screamed
> 2)pee'd my pants (just a little)
> 3)tried to make another door through her husband.
Gee, I'm sorry I missed that.
Probably a good thing i never told you about that spider at Stone
Mountain....
--
Pt
Unsolicited Commercial Email forbidden
James Nicoll
The one time my grandmother [who was very hard on girlfriends
and wives of her son and grandkids] met my ex-wife, they failed to
hit it off. I had almost persuaded her we could still enjoy our trip
to SF when an extremely large spider fell on Mary, who was very
-very- afraid of spiders. Instant hysterics, helped by sour comments
from Maude [my grandmother] about adults exercising self control.
Not a fun trip, actually.
--
"I don't laugh at you when you're hurt. I laugh at
you when you've been -maimed-."
Cinderella
sunbird <patrick...@ericsson.com> wrote:
>Cinderella wrote:
>> My phobia is definitely of the arachnid variety. Brings up a memory of
>> being at my sisters house one day. She turns towards me and screams and
>> flails whilst flinging some large black thing with eight legs at me. I
>> promptly
>> 1)screamed
>> 2)pee'd my pants (just a little)
>> 3)tried to make another door through her husband.
>
>
>Gee, I'm sorry I missed that.
>
>Probably a good thing i never told you about that spider at Stone
>Mountain....
>
Probably. :)
I've always thought it odd that I love to go camping, hiking, rock
climbing, you name it - just about anything outdoors but the idea of
coming in contact with spiders just about kills me.
Ticks...now there is something truly horrifying to me. It is essentially
a burrowing, bloodsucking spider.
I found my first tick this year. I've been playing on my work softball
league this summer. The park we play at is right beside the river in a
heavily wooded area. It's a midnight league so usually I'm not home till
3, 4, maybe 6 if the beer is flowing.
Well, I came home one night and was brushing my hair when I felt a bump
on my head. I became immediately squicked. I mean, it was right in an
area where I could barely see it - I could only feel it. After about a
minute of furious debate with myself I woke Tim up at four am to get this
thing out of my head. I shook and cried until he got it out.
Cinderella, that's love baby...