akward start
Angald Creach
So, I'm a late starter. I had my first encounter this week, which I
(oddly?) feel no shame about: it was with a stripper. (oral, no
intercourse)
I, apparently being a healthy man, enjoyed the hell out of it, especially
giving it.
But I'm at a bit of a loss in where to go from here. I've never been a
very outgoing socialite - I have no problem talking to people mind you...
I just don't really enjoy going out to places/events where you might
actually meet people. I also seem to get get obviously awkward when
there's more than a platonic interest involved.
What hope is there for me? I feel I must have missed some important
social development, or I wouldn't be having this problem. Hell, I'm
asking on usenet - this might indicate something no?
I have no shame for what I did, but I don't feel I would like to resort
to that again. I also do not feel I would want to hook up barflies. I'm
at a loss.
Respectfully,
A Clueless Rube
PS: (possibly graphic, don't ROT13 if you don't want to read it)
Ubj abezny vf vg gb unir ab gebhoyr ynfgvat qhevat guvf svefg gvzr? Nf
jryy, sebz jung V'ir urneq/ernq, orvat tbbq ng cresbezvat phaavyvathf vf
abg ernyyl nyy gung pbzzba. Ubj gur uryy qvq V znantr gb svavfu ure gur
svefg gvzr va zvahgrf naq evqr ure (cyngrnh?) sbe n tbbq rkgen 10 gb 15
zvahgrf jvgu ab cevbe rkcrevrapr? Jnf V whfg yhpxl?
Serene Vannoy
> Context: I'm a 25 year old straight male
>
> So, I'm a late starter. I had my first encounter this week, which I
> (oddly?) feel no shame about: it was with a stripper. (oral, no
> intercourse)
I don't think it's odd not to feel shame about sex. If you paid her for
sex, I think it's odd not to call her a prostitute, but hey, maybe
that's just me.
I was a late starter, too. I was 25, like you, the first time I had
(consensual) sex.
>
> I, apparently being a healthy man, enjoyed the hell out of it, especially
> giving it.
>
> But I'm at a bit of a loss in where to go from here. I've never been a
> very outgoing socialite - I have no problem talking to people mind you...
> I just don't really enjoy going out to places/events where you might
> actually meet people. I also seem to get get obviously awkward when
> there's more than a platonic interest involved.
Exactly so for me. I'm a bit of a hermit, and socially awkward,
especially with strangers or in situations where it has any similarity
to the dreaded "dating".
>
> What hope is there for me? I feel I must have missed some important
> social development, or I wouldn't be having this problem. Hell, I'm
> asking on usenet - this might indicate something no?
Maybe that you're smart? The internet is a great place to meet people
when you're more comfortable in text than in person at first, like I am.
I have two partners (and have been with both of them for more than
eight years). I met one of them on Usenet (alt.polyamory) and the other
on LiveJournal. There's no shame in choosing your venues to meet your needs.
By the time I met Guy (the partner I met on Usenet) in person, we were
already in love and planning our lives together. I moved 500 miles to
live nearer him, about a year after our first in-person meeting.
>
> I have no shame for what I did, but I don't feel I would like to resort
> to that again. I also do not feel I would want to hook up barflies. I'm
> at a loss.
Don't if you don't want to. I don't go to bars, because then I'd end up
with people who drink recreationally for partners, and that's not
appealing to me at all.
>
> Respectfully,
> A Clueless Rube
>
> PS: (possibly graphic, don't ROT13 if you don't want to read it)
> Ubj abezny vf vg gb unir ab gebhoyr ynfgvat qhevat guvf svefg gvzr? Nf
> jryy, sebz jung V'ir urneq/ernq, orvat tbbq ng cresbezvat phaavyvathf vf
> abg ernyyl nyy gung pbzzba. Ubj gur uryy qvq V znantr gb svavfu ure gur
> svefg gvzr va zvahgrf naq evqr ure (cyngrnh?) sbe n tbbq rkgen 10 gb 15
> zvahgrf jvgu ab cevbe rkcrevrapr? Jnf V whfg yhpxl?
>
Perfectly normal, especially since you're older. I wouldn't, however,
assume anything about how well you satisfied her. It's easy for women to
fake it, and you need a larger sample size before you get all smug about
your prowess. :-)
Serene