Why is my dream girl everytime there where I´m not?

aquar...@googlemail.com

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Oct 20, 2009, 6:52:38 AM10/20/09

to

Asking questions is better than assesing.

Spiritus

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Oct 20, 2009, 2:37:27 PM10/20/09

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On Oct 20, 6:52 am, "Aquarius...@googlemail.com"

<aquarius...@googlemail.com> wrote:
> Asking questions is better than assesing.

Must be one of those unanswerable questions.

MeaningWhat

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Oct 20, 2009, 4:50:41 PM10/20/09

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Aquar...@googlemail.com schrieb:

> Asking questions is better than assesing.

who is the girl of your dreams?

Spiritus

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Oct 20, 2009, 7:00:32 PM10/20/09

to

On Oct 20, 6:52 am, "Aquarius...@googlemail.com"
<aquarius...@googlemail.com> wrote:

> Asking questions is better than assesing.

Please tell us it isn't the Magic Drag Queen.

aquar...@googlemail.com

unread,

Oct 21, 2009, 11:28:45 AM10/21/09

to

On Oct 20, 10:50 pm, MeaningWhat <meaningwhat2...@googlemail.com>
wrote:
> Aquarius...@googlemail.com schrieb:> Asking questions is better than assesing.

>
> who is the girl of your dreams?

Sybille.

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 21, 2009, 11:30:28 AM10/21/09

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I thought she was already married to Basil.

Mother Nature

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Oct 21, 2009, 11:24:59 PM10/21/09

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I thought it was a role for Sally Fields in a made for TV movie.

Hoots

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Oct 22, 2009, 6:12:46 AM10/22/09

to

Best. TV. show. ever.

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 22, 2009, 8:32:18 AM10/22/09

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I speak English very well. I learned it from a penpal. :-)

MeaningWhat

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Oct 22, 2009, 11:13:39 AM10/22/09

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Aquar...@googlemail.com schrieb:

like the ancient prophets? nice. where is she, or better, where arent
you? and why?

Hoots

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Oct 23, 2009, 6:41:56 AM10/23/09

to

The Germans!

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 23, 2009, 8:19:08 AM10/23/09

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Don't mention the war!

Hoots

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Oct 24, 2009, 8:21:26 AM10/24/09

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I'd like an order of Eva Prawns, please...

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 24, 2009, 8:43:32 AM10/24/09

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Waldorf Salad!

Hoots

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Oct 25, 2009, 7:07:56 AM10/25/09

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Don't mind him, he's from Barcelona.

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 25, 2009, 8:47:42 AM10/25/09

to

If the good Lord--

Is mentioned one more time I will bring you closer to him!

Hoots

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Oct 26, 2009, 6:40:06 AM10/26/09

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There is too much butter on those trays.

aquar...@googlemail.com

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Oct 26, 2009, 7:24:33 AM10/26/09

to

On Oct 25, 12:07 pm, Hoots <ratty_...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> Dr. Chuck wrote:
> > On 10/24/2009 8:21 AM, Hoots wrote:
> >> Dr. Chuck wrote:
> >>> On 10/23/2009 6:41 AM, Hoots wrote:
> >>>> Dr. Chuck wrote:
> >>>>> On 10/22/2009 6:12 AM, Hoots wrote:
> >>>>>> Dr. Chuck wrote:

> >>>>>>> On 10/21/2009 11:28 AM, Aquarius...@googlemail.com wrote:
> >>>>>>>> On Oct 20, 10:50 pm, MeaningWhat <meaningwhat2...@googlemail.com>
> >>>>>>>> wrote:
> >>>>>>>>> Aquarius...@googlemail.com schrieb:> Asking questions is better
> >>>>>>>>> than assesing.
>
> >>>>>>>>> who is the girl of your dreams?
>
> >>>>>>>> Sybille.
>
> >>>>>>> I thought she was already married to Basil.
>
> >>>>>> Best. TV. show. ever.
>
> >>>>> I speak English very well. I learned it from a penpal. :-)
>
> >>>> The Germans!
>
> >>> Don't mention the war!
>
> >> I'd like an order of Eva Prawns, please...
>
> > Waldorf Salad!
>

> Don't mind him, he's from Barcelona.- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

Who´s from Barca?

Hoots

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Oct 26, 2009, 7:44:27 AM10/26/09

to

Manuel

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 26, 2009, 6:32:23 PM10/26/09

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No, no, no: uno, dos, tres.

Hoots

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Oct 27, 2009, 6:35:07 AM10/27/09

to

Sybil's laugh sounds like somebody machine-gunning a seal.

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 27, 2009, 6:27:31 PM10/27/09

to

We've been to a wedding.

Hoots

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Oct 28, 2009, 6:08:40 AM10/28/09

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Coming my little piranha fish.

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 28, 2009, 7:19:10 PM10/28/09

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Basil the rat.

Hoots

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Oct 29, 2009, 6:02:58 AM10/29/09

to

If you bother me again I shall visit you in the small hours of the night
and put a bat up your nightdress.

Dr. Chuck

unread,

Oct 29, 2009, 6:27:25 PM10/29/09

to

Manuel!

Hoots

unread,

Oct 30, 2009, 6:11:42 AM10/30/09

to

Next contestant; Mrs. Sybil Fawlty from Torquay. Specialist subject-the
bleeding obvious.

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 30, 2009, 6:45:18 PM10/30/09

to

Where's the real boss?

In Madrid!

Hoots

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Oct 31, 2009, 6:35:12 AM10/31/09

to

Because they're the wrong *shape*.

Oh, my! What shape do you prefer? Mickey Mouse shape? Smarties shape?
Amphibious landing-craft shape? Poke-in-the-eye shape?

Dr. Chuck

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Oct 31, 2009, 9:04:30 AM10/31/09

to

DON'T THINK ME RUDE, BUT DO YOU BY CHANCE HAVE A HEARING AID?

Hoots

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Nov 1, 2009, 6:12:24 AM11/1/09

to

Look, we've been waiting here for about half an hour now, I mean I gave
the waiter our order...

Oh, *him*. He's hopeless, isn't he?

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 1, 2009, 8:51:05 AM11/1/09

to

I know nothing about a horse!

Hoots

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Nov 2, 2009, 5:50:24 AM11/2/09

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Why don't you have another vat of wine, dear?

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 2, 2009, 6:59:42 PM11/2/09

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What a horrible dream!

Hoots

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Nov 3, 2009, 5:45:41 AM11/3/09

to

Basil doesn't bet on the horses anymore, do you?

No, that particular avenue of pleasure has been closed off.

And we don't want it opened up again, do we?

No, you don't dear.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 3, 2009, 7:09:34 PM11/3/09

to

I've been trying to get through to the speaking clock... Well, it's
engaged... Well, it's been engaged for ten minutes. How is this
possible? My wife isn't talking to it.

Hoots

unread,

Nov 4, 2009, 5:44:03 AM11/4/09

to

Do you remember when we were first *manacled* together? We used to laugh
quite a lot.

Yes, but not at the same time, Basil.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 4, 2009, 7:10:06 PM11/4/09

to

Hello?... Ah, yes Mr O'Reilly, well it's perfectly simple. When I asked
you to build me a wall I was rather hoping that instead of just dumping
the bricks in a pile you might have found time to cement them
together... you know, one on top of another, in the traditional fashion.

Hoots

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Nov 8, 2009, 8:07:00 AM11/8/09

to

We have a Spanish porter at the moment, he's from Barcelona. It'd be
quicker to train an *ape*!

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 8, 2009, 9:03:13 AM11/8/09

to

Don't be alarmed, it's only my wife laughing.

Hoots

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Nov 8, 2009, 9:45:48 AM11/8/09

to

Stupidissimo! Continental cretin!

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 8, 2009, 10:09:05 AM11/8/09

to

I asked for a room with a view.

That is Torquay, ma'am.

That is not good enough.

Well, may I ask what you were expecting to see out of a Torquay hotel
bedroom window? Sydney Opera House, perhaps? The Hanging Gardens of
Babylon? Herds of wildebeasts swinging majestically...

Hoots

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Nov 9, 2009, 6:15:42 AM11/9/09

to

ARSE I have to put up with from you people. You ponce in here expecting
to be waited on hand and foot, while I'm trying to run a hotel here.
Have you any idea of how much there is to do? Do you ever think of that?
Of course not, you're all too busy sticking your noses into every
corner, poking around for things to complain about, aren't you? Well let
me tell you something - this is exactly how Nazi Germany started. A lot
of layabouts with nothing better to do than to cause trouble. Well I've
had fifteen years of pandering to the likes of you, and I've had enough.
I've had it. Come on, pack your bags and get out.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 9, 2009, 7:37:52 PM11/9/09

to

I say to man in shop "Is rat." He say "No, no, no. Is a special kind
of hamster. Is filigree Siberian hamster." Only one in shop. He make
special price: only five pound.

Have you ever heard of the bubonic plague, Manuel? It was very popular
here at one time. A lot of pedigree hamsters came over on ships from
Siberia.

Hoots

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Nov 10, 2009, 6:52:46 AM11/10/09

to

Right, well I'll go and have a lie down then. No I won't; I'll go and
hit some guests.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 10, 2009, 11:16:40 PM11/10/09

to

Ohh, he hit me on the head.

No! You hit him on the head. You naughty moose.

Hoots

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Nov 11, 2009, 6:04:01 AM11/11/09

to

Manuel will show you to your rooms - if you're lucky.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 11, 2009, 8:45:38 PM11/11/09

to

Next contestant, Mrs. Sybil Fawlty from Torquay. Specialist subject -
the bleeding obvious.

Hoots

unread,

Nov 12, 2009, 6:02:03 AM11/12/09

to

Stupidissimo! Continental cretin!

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 12, 2009, 7:51:15 PM11/12/09

to

I am from Barcelona!

Hoots

unread,

Nov 13, 2009, 5:46:55 AM11/13/09

to

And don't do anything *we* wouldn't do!

Oh, just a little breathing, surely.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 13, 2009, 10:46:49 PM11/13/09

to

Oh, and Basil, one more thing: If you're going to grope a girl, have the
gallantry to stay in the room with her while you're doing it.

Hoots

unread,

Nov 14, 2009, 6:39:23 AM11/14/09

to

So this Finnish floozy is your karate teacher is she?

Well. It's a sort of karate isn't it?

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 14, 2009, 9:08:52 AM11/14/09

to

Where are the pens?

They're in that box. It says "pens" quite clearly.

Looks more like "Ben's."

Well when Ben comes, you can give it to him.

Hoots

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Nov 14, 2009, 9:51:04 AM11/14/09

to

Can we get you something else Mr. Hutchinson? A tea cozy for your pepper
pot perhaps?

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 14, 2009, 1:05:49 PM11/14/09

to

You could have had both of them finished by now if you hadn't spent the
whole morning in there skulking and listening to that racket.

"Racket?" That's *Brahms*! Brahms's third racket!

Hoots

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Nov 15, 2009, 6:31:01 AM11/15/09

to

Polly, what's that smell?

Flowers, I just got them from the garden.

Well, what are you stinking the place up with those for? What's happened
to the plastic ones?

Being ironed.

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 15, 2009, 8:56:24 AM11/15/09

to

P. Off.

I beg your pardon?

P. off! not B. off. Whoever heard of a Bost office?

Hoots

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Nov 16, 2009, 7:28:57 AM11/16/09

to

What a silly bunt

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 17, 2009, 6:55:49 PM11/17/09

to

I saw your advert in the bolour supplement.

Hoots

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Nov 18, 2009, 6:33:46 AM11/18/09

to

Fat German businessmen forming pyramids and frightening the children

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 18, 2009, 6:40:04 PM11/18/09

to

BURMA!

Hoots

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Nov 19, 2009, 6:20:39 AM11/19/09

to

Would you like to buy an argument?

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 19, 2009, 7:26:34 PM11/19/09

to

Aah, how about Cheddar?

Well, we don't get much call for it around here, sir.

Hoots

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Nov 20, 2009, 6:49:55 AM11/20/09

to

How Not to Be Seen

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 20, 2009, 7:27:45 PM11/20/09

to

Wonderful spam

Hoots

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:46:01 AM11/21/09

to

Anne Elk

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 21, 2009, 9:17:42 AM11/21/09

to

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 21, 2009, 9:18:04 AM11/21/09

to

No one is to stone anyone until I blow this whistle!

Hoots

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Nov 21, 2009, 2:32:35 PM11/21/09

to

I'm going to attack you with a banana!

%

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Nov 21, 2009, 2:44:19 PM11/21/09

to

"Hoots" <ratt...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:he9f8p$upm$1...@news.eternal-september.org...

that's yellaw

Dr. Chuck

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Nov 21, 2009, 3:09:00 PM11/21/09

to

Have you got anything without spam, then?

Mother Nature

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Nov 22, 2009, 1:50:20 AM11/22/09

to

Exactly how are you going to attack him with a banana? <g>

Hoots

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Nov 22, 2009, 7:43:04 AM11/22/09

to

Better yet, what would he do if I came at him with a handful of
loganberries?

Hoots

unread,

Nov 22, 2009, 7:43:54 AM11/22/09

to

Like *this*!

And then he'd release the Bengal Tiger!

Mother Nature

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Nov 23, 2009, 2:33:19 AM11/23/09

to

Get a bowl?

aquar...@googlemail.com

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Nov 23, 2009, 6:58:45 AM11/23/09

to

> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Aquarius...@googlemail.com

Oh Goi! Why?