Berkeley
Tom Lemos
> rjw...@PacBell.COM (Rod Williams) writes:
>
> >> tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu (John Dorrance) inquires:
>
> >> Am I a Berkeley kind of guy?
>
> >Possibly -- but do you plan on strolling around naked on campus?
>
> No - just getting married.
>
to a Berkeley boy???? don't do it. They're evil, evil I say...
T...@Tatertot.com (Tom Lemos) TaterTot News & Mail
Internet:Tatertot.COM
"yeah, and if a frog had wings he wouldn't bump San Francisco,CA
his ass when he hopped" -'Wayne's World' +1.415.255.8340
Matthew Melmon
> to a Berkeley boy???? don't do it. They're evil, evil I say...
I once knew a floppy blond Berkeley boy who went, a couple of times,
to an 18+ dive down by the bay. He was, in fact, the prototype
floppy blond. He had a cute face, but nothing particularly
remarkable. His butt, however, was to DIE for. To *DIE* for.
I think he was a skater. Skaters have the most beautiful butts.
Just perfect. Not too big, yet nice and full and with just the
perfect flush of color.
Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt! Talk amongst yourselves, talk
amongst yourselves. Here, I'll give you a topic:
Dorian Gray (oh, piss - is it Gray or Grey? Damn English. Too
damn clever, if you ask me) represents *the* *ultimate* literary
*twink* and excuses completely, and without doubt, the outright
*misogyny* of Oscar Wilde's writing.
*X*
S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
Brian Griffiths
>
This Berkeley boy doth protest. Evil? That's all a matter of definition.
;-)
Brian Griffiths
U.C.- Berkeley
brian_g...@maillink.berkeley.edu
Timothy Keeling
>...
>I think he was a skater. Skaters have the most beautiful butts.
>Just perfect. Not too big, yet nice and full and with just the
>perfect flush of color.
>
>*X*
>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
I agree. I was watching a skater on TV the other day. The silver medalist.
The *very first thing* I thought to myself was, 'Would you look at that
butt!'. I can't even remember how many twirls he did. I could only look
at that wonderful butt.
Nelson Minar
MelMcXMellifluousMothra writes:
>>I think he was a skater.
Quiz time - what is a skater?
I am dismayed to find that "grunge," the major cultural export from
the Pacific Northwest in the last ten years, is rapidly infiltrating
all manners of society. There was a picture in the New York Times'
fashion section a few days ago of "disaffected youth" wearing the
uniform, plaid shirts tied around the waist.
__
nel...@reed.edu \/ Shop as usual and avoid panic buying
Éamonn McManus
> Dorian Gray (oh, piss - is it Gray or Grey? Damn English. Too
I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Oscar
Wilde was not English.
,
Eamonn
"There is something tragic about the enormous number of young men
there are in England at the present moment who start life with perfect
profiles, and end by adopting some useful profession."
-- Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young
Robert Coren
>
> I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Oscar
> Wilde was not English.
Of course it would. So don't.
(As everybody knows, speakers of this language come in two flavors:
American and English. anybody who tells you otherwise is a
hair-splitter whose purpose is to confuse you through obfuscation.)
Chris Chin
>>...
>>I think he was a skater. Skaters have the most beautiful butts.
>>Just perfect. Not too big, yet nice and full and with just the
>>perfect flush of color.
>
>The *very first thing* I thought to myself was, 'Would you look at that
>butt!'. I can't even remember how many twirls he did. I could only look
>at that wonderful butt.
>
Hee hee! I can think of *one* way that you could keep track of the twirls,
but I'll save that for alt.sex.stories. The Canadian National Team that
will compete at Lillejammer (Lillyhammer?) in 1996 has a gay skater on it.
His name is Matthew Hall and he is *quite* out. He came out when he was
20, I believe, and ran into some personal problems. After leaving the sport
for a while, he got back into it (with the love of a good man, of course!)
and now he's going for gold at the Olympics.
*Sigh* Sounds like a fairy ;-) tale doesn't it? btw, I've met him and he
seems like a nice guy. Very focussed, but that can be nice.
What's that? Oh yes, he has a *very* nice butt.
:)
*Chris*
====
Chris Chin ______ hcc...@watserv1.uwaterloo.ca
\ / hcc...@artspas.watstar.uwaterloo.ca
love + pride + strength \ / cs...@cleveland.freenet.edu ah...@yfn.ysu.edu
+ unity = freedom \/ ua...@freenet.victoria.bc.ca
Paul Hastings
>>In article <mattm-220...@mcmelmon.apple.com> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>>>...
>>>I think he was a skater. Skaters have the most beautiful butts.
>>>Just perfect. Not too big, yet nice and full and with just the
>>>perfect flush of color.
>>
>but I'll save that for alt.sex.stories. The Canadian National Team that
>will compete at Lillejammer (Lillyhammer?) in 1996 has a gay skater on it.
>His name is Matthew Hall and he is *quite* out. He came out when he was
>20, I believe, and ran into some personal problems. After leaving the sport
>for a while, he got back into it (with the love of a good man, of course!)
>and now he's going for gold at the Olympics.
>*Sigh* Sounds like a fairy ;-) tale doesn't it? btw, I've met him and he
>seems like a nice guy. Very focussed, but that can be nice.
Yeah, Matthew's a decent sort if you can dig past the attitude. And that
seems to be mellowing a bit in the last year or so. He's adamant about
being out, and disturbed by the degree of closeting in professional sports,
'specially figure skating. At the competitions to get on the National
Team several weeks ago he wore a dashing all-white one-piece with a smart
sequined red-ribbon motif on the front-left. Very out, and tasteful. We
had a good chat most recently at the New Year's Eve Sear's Warehouse Party
(NWESWP, if yer in the know) about sports and gayness and such-what. I
really should introduce him to Brian Pronger (author of Arena of Masculinity
(homosexuality in sports) and PhD student in the UofT PhysEd program).
Have fun in Washington, Chris! Treat our neighbours well...
-paul
--
Butch Smurf S6 b++ g l y+ z+ n+ o+ x+ a-u v+ j+
It's a smurf thing; I don't understand.
Matthew Melmon
which is to say roller blades and boards on pavement. However,
Olympic ice-skaters are certainly *not* *bad* *at* *all* when it
comes to have zee fine tails. There is a different muscle structure
to the skater butt. Dancer's have nice buts, but they tend to be,
oh *different* Like, *broader*, perhaps. There is a leaner, meaner
form to the skater butt.
Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt!
*X*
Mick Washbrook
>
> Dorian Gray (oh, piss - is it Gray or Grey? Damn English. Too
> damn clever, if you ask me) represents *the* *ultimate* literary
> *twink* and excuses completely, and without doubt, the outright
> *misogyny* of Oscar Wilde's writing.
Now I believe you're supposed to *fling* yourself down
on some silken divan like some utterly *wretched*
creature.
--
Death to all fanatics!!
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
Matthew Melmon
wrote:
>
> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
> > Dorian Gray (oh, piss - is it Gray or Grey? Damn English. Too
> > damn clever, if you ask me) [...]
>
> I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Oscar
> Wilde was not English.
I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Dorian
Gra(e)y *was* English...
John Dorrance
>Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt!
It's a wonder you don't short out the computer from saying that.
It's 'verklempt', Melba, 'verklempt'!!! Learn it, work it, own it.
>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
So? I get laid more.
--
tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu * John Dorrance * Disco Diva y Flamenco Chico
If I wait for the rain to kiss me and undress me
Will I look a fool - wet and a mess?
Mike Reaser
> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>
> >S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
>
> So? I get laid more.
>
Thaaang, honey, getting laid _any_ would be more than our little
Melodramatic Matthew, at least from his own "woe is me" varietal
whines.
--
=======================================================================
Mike Reaser, Hewlett-Packard N. Amer. Response Center - Atlanta
Internet: m...@hpuerca.atl.hp.com
NBCS: B5 f t w g+ k s I barely speak for myself, so
#include <standard.disclaimer> don't make me speak for HP
=======================================================================
John Dorrance
tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu (John Dorrance) writes:
>> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>>
>> >S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
>>
>> So? I get laid more.
>Thaaang, honey, getting laid _any_ would be more than our little
>Melodramatic Matthew, at least from his own "woe is me" varietal
>whines.
Hey, I take my petty excuses for assuming superiority where I can
get 'em.
Mara Chibnik
emcm...@gr.osf.org (Éamonn McManus) writes:
>> I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Oscar
>> Wilde was not English.
co...@speed.osf.org (Robert Coren) writes:
>Of course it would. So don't.
I think you stopped him just in time.
>(As everybody knows, speakers of this language come in two flavors:
>American and English. anybody who tells you otherwise is a
>hair-splitter whose purpose is to confuse you through obfuscation.)
Tsk, tsk, Robert. You forgot about FJ!!
CW [who will not try to figure out who all else is so competent in
English that she can't place the accent over the net, but who
knows about Oscar Wilde]
--
Mara Chibnik
ma...@panix.com Life is too important to be taken seriously.
Matthew Melmon
>
> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>
> >Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt!
>
> It's a wonder you don't short out the computer from saying that.
> It's 'verklempt', Melba, 'verklempt'!!! Learn it, work it, own it.
Mz Thaang, do acquire a *clue* Do you think, perhaps, that I
*know* - from innumerable e-mails and postings and what not -
how to spell the fucking word? Perhaps when you have outgrown
your puppy-dog nymph stage, you will discover additional avenues
for rhetorical expression - like, *acquired* air-headism, as
opposed to *natural* air-headism.
*X*
chlo...@ohstpy.mps.ohio-state.edu
What about Australians?
Beware of flames before answering.
Frank
\
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Frank R. Chloupek
CHLO...@ohstpy.mps.ohio-state.edu
Department of Physics -- *The* Ohio State University
(Not just any Ohio State University)
"YOU BETTAH WORK!"--RuPaul
Mike Reaser
> In article <thaaang.730515063@cwis>, tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu (John
> Dorrance) wrote:
> >
> > ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
> >
> > >Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt!
> >
> > It's a wonder you don't short out the computer from saying that.
> > It's 'verklempt', Melba, 'verklempt'!!! Learn it, work it, own it.
>
> Mz Thaang, do acquire a *clue* Do you think, perhaps, that I
> *know* - from innumerable e-mails and postings and what not -
> how to spell the fucking word?
No. Not at all. Since your perception usually seems to parallel that
of a used Bic pen, no presumption can be made on your vocabulary
talents.
> Perhaps when you have outgrown
> your puppy-dog nymph stage, you will discover additional avenues
> for rhetorical expression - like, *acquired* air-headism, as
> opposed to *natural* air-headism.
Finally! The child has attained his ambitions, and he's proclaimed
it for all the world to see.
You see, we all thought Matthew had malfunctioning neurons between
the ears. Now we know that he purposely allowed them to atrophy,
so he could be the dizziest queen around.
However, what will he do when he hits, say, 35 or 40 and needs to
start using some of those brain cells -- take some sort of anti-
dingbat injection?
John Dorrance
>Mz Thaang, do acquire a *clue* Do you think, perhaps, that I
Ahem.
>*know* - from innumerable e-mails and postings and what not -
>how to spell the fucking word? Perhaps when you have outgrown
>your puppy-dog nymph stage,
HA! When I'm through with my puppy-dog nymph stage, I'll go to my
fluffy-wuffy cocker spaniel nymph stage. I'll continue maturing in
this manner until I've become a full-grown vixen. But you, on the
other hand, are limited to the twinkie track, as outlined in one
of your previous posts. Once you hit that glass ceiling, baby,
you've had it. I have no limits. You may kowtow at any time.
>you will discover additional avenues
>for rhetorical expression - like, *acquired* air-headism, as
>opposed to *natural* air-headism.
Hmmph. Fake airhead, fake blond, has to *shave* his body. Is your
whole life a sham?
>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
And you failed to respond to my allegations that I get laid more'n
you, despite your geographical advantage.
00bbh...@leo.bsuvc.bsu.edu
> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>
>>Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt!
>
> It's a wonder you don't short out the computer from saying that.
> It's 'verklempt', Melba, 'verklempt'!!! Learn it, work it, own it.
>
>>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
>
> So? I get laid more.
>
> --
> tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu * John Dorrance * Disco Diva y Flamenco Chico
>
> If I wait for the rain to kiss me and undress me
> Will I look a fool - wet and a mess?
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
No, just influenza stricken.
brandon
Matthew Melmon
Dorrance) wrote:
> Hmmph. Fake airhead, fake blond, has to *shave* his body. Is your
> whole life a sham?
You're *so* *close* to Enlightenment, it's almost painful. One
day, you will awaken and all will become clear. You will say,
to yourself (or perhaps you will roll over and say to whomsoever
is adjacent) - "Hey! It's all a joke! It's all a *sham*"
> And you failed to respond to my allegations that I get laid more'n
> you, despite your geographical advantage.
First, I would - but I'm not yet due for a Righteous Indignation
Fit. Perhaps if you phrased it in a more absurd manner - like
"You failed to respond to my allegations that I exercise my
God-given right to fuck in the streets more than you" I would
be more likely to throw a RIF.
Perhaps I would have gotten laid last week, but for the unfortunate
presence of a Sultan Twink... Anyway - maybe you should consider
the fact that your geographic location can be viewed as a disadvantage
*or* as an advantage. Whereas I must compete for my tricks, whatever
comes *your* way ain't got much of a choice, now, does it?
Adversity makes for fast bed-fellows, eh oui?
(*X*, by the way, is no longer a fake blond. Most of my natural
dull brown has returned, and only the tippie-most tips retain
their copper-gold hue. I will, however, soon return to a state
of fake-dom, once my hair has recovered from the acid bath of
a previous era)
Matthew Melmon
Reaser) wrote:
> However, what will he do when he hits, say, 35 or 40 and needs to
> start using some of those brain cells -- take some sort of anti-
> dingbat injection?
"Reject Applied Updates"
*X* (whoooooo... AIX humor from an Apple Fairy)
Greg Parkinson
>In article <mattm-220...@mcmelmon.apple.com>, ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>>
>> Dorian Gray (oh, piss - is it Gray or Grey? Damn English. Too
>> damn clever, if you ask me) represents *the* *ultimate* literary
>> *twink* and excuses completely, and without doubt, the outright
>> *misogyny* of Oscar Wilde's writing.
>Now I believe you're supposed to *fling* yourself down
>on some silken divan like some utterly *wretched*
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Oyster Italian Leather Sofa (or Loveseat)
Bob Donahue
>However, what will he do when he hits, say, 35 or 40 and needs to
>start using some of those brain cells -- take some sort of anti-
>dingbat injection?
???! Judging from his picture - I thought he WAS 35 or 40...
BBC
Arnold Zwicky
pleasure to its maker, but some of the greatest delights in eating
come from foods you can really get your hands on, or if possible,
into.
artichokes. great fun (though they do require a certain amount
of patience), and as a bonus you get great fibrous leaves for
your compost heap. hard to beat scraping your food off a leaf
with your teeth for elegant engagement with the materials of
simple survival.
asparagus, by hand. thin young spears dipped in butter. i have
a friend who once wrote a poem to the eating of asparagus in this
fashion. [well, her poem was in free verse, and was not meant
to be taken by hand and with butter.]
goodness, we're still in letter A!
arnold (A is for Arnold
Allayed by Asperges...)
Arnold Zwicky
into a world where vegetarians fear to tread: the world of animal
parts you can grasp in your hands and graw on happily. [some
may wish to avert their eyes here.]
some might choose the barbecued pork rib or the fried chicken leg
as the height of dealing with your food with your own two good hands,
but many would prefer our high-protein [and low-fat] arthropod
friends, for instance the lobster and the crab. such fun, cracking
their shells open.
oh...Privates on Parade is coming on the telly...hold onto
those carapaces until i get back.
arnold of the altiplano
Rod Williams
>
>goodness, we're still in letter A!
>
>arnold (A is for Arnold
> Allayed by Asperges...)
>
thanks, arnold -- very salsifying stuff.
--
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
rod williams -=- pacific bell -=- san ramon, ca -=- rjw...@pacbell.com
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Daniel Gilly
>In article <loisp...@utkcs2.cs.utk.edu> kee...@cs.utk.edu
(Timothy Keeling) writes:
>>I agree. I was watching a skater on TV the other day. The silver medalist.
I've lost track of the reference here. This wouldn't be about Paul
Wylie, the silver medalist in the '92 Winter Olympics, would it?
>>The *very first thing* I thought to myself was, 'Would you look at that
>>butt!'. I can't even remember how many twirls he did. I could only look
>>at that wonderful butt.
> [ ... ]
>The Canadian National Team that
>will compete at Lillejammer (Lillyhammer?) in 1996 has a gay skater on it.
>His name is Matthew Hall and he is *quite* out.
> [ ... ]
>*Sigh* Sounds like a fairy ;-) tale doesn't it? btw, I've met him and he
>seems like a nice guy. Very focussed, but that can be nice.
Among my Bob's many travels, he's had the fortune to sit next to Paul
Wylie, during a plane trip several years ago. This was while Paul was
still in school (Harvard?) and was still on the rise as a skater. Bob
now follows the doings of Paul Wylie with great interest. And Bob has
made it clear that he admires more than just his talent as a skater. :-)
--
Daniel Gilly
------------------------------------------------------------------
dgi...@us.oracle.com Oracle Corporation
B0h-f-r-s-t-w-mc+g+ Redwood Shores, CA
Robert Coren
> In article <1993Feb23....@osf.org>, co...@speed.osf.org (Robert Coren) writes:
> > (As everybody knows, speakers of this language come in two flavors:
> > American and English. anybody who tells you otherwise is a
> > hair-splitter whose purpose is to confuse you through obfuscation.)
> >
> So do Canadians speak English or American?
>
> What about Australians?
Canadians? Australians? What are those?
[*Now* do you get it?]
Matthew Melmon
wrote:
> >>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
>
> WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN?
> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
spdcc.com - run by *that* *man* - has, in pub, I believe, the
relevant document from which the above was extracted. Going over
them briefly:
S stands for 'smurf' - do not ask me why. It is based on a nine
point scale, with the description for nine being:
(snort with acrobatics) Intrusively humorous in finding fun.
Wildly ridiculous, often ignored or *disliked*
b stands for 'blue' - and is described as 'affiliation with smurf
gang.' Again, do not ask me, I have no idea who the hell these
people are, thus: b -
no affiliation with gang.
g 'Smurfensual gratification' (I did not write this...) - *sweetness*
The g- indicates:
Ascerbic, chilly, but tolerable, as long as you wear your sweater.
l 'laugh quality' - l indicates
Middle C octave
y (my favorite) - Yellow factor (twinkiness). I would dearly love
to be a y++ (or, in gaylon's case, a y++!), but am not blond. Thus,
y+
z Fashion Statement - please.
n knowledge - familiarity with Smurfs. n:
Smurfs are blue
o obnoxiousness - please.
x exceptionalism - pomposity or self-glorification - please.
a articulateness - more of a tough call, and, in my opinion, an
error in definition. It seems to imply an anal-retentive attitude
about such a petty, tired thing as *grammer*, is worthy of note.
But, anyway, points for 'wildly descriptive phrases'
v - Valley - please
j - jokes or puns - please
*X*
Mike Reaser
Sure, it's easy.
Canadians: those folk who reside in that northern suburb of Buffalo.
Australians: people who live in quaint little castles, eating all
different kinds of sweets and pastries.
For the humor-impaired: :-) :-) :-)
Éamonn McManus
> > > Dorian Gray (oh, piss - is it Gray or Grey? Damn English. Too
> > > damn clever, if you ask me) [...]
I wrote:
> > I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Oscar
> > Wilde was not English.
Matthew wrote:
> I suppose it would be a waste of time for me to mention that Dorian
> Gra(e)y *was* English...
If I was trying to have the last unspoken word, I would fail to
remark that fictional characters, no matter how clever, do not choose
the spelling of their names.
,
Eamonn
"It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either
charming or tedious."
-- Lady Windermere's Fan
Jack B. Nimble
00bbh...@leo.bsuvc.bsu.edu writes:
>>>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
>
>WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN?
>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
>
Don't fret about it, Hon. It's only a misplaced line of C code.
---
Jack B. Newsbaum Necessity is the plea for every
Library Information Systems infringement of human freedom. It is the
University Research Library argument of tyrants; it is the creed of
ecl...@mvs.oac.ucla.edu slaves. (William Pitt)
Matthew Melmon
wrote:
> If I was trying to have the last unspoken word, I would fail to
> remark that fictional characters, no matter how clever, do not choose
> the spelling of their names.
And if I was trying to have the last unspoken word, I might point
out that an author (and one who spent a great deal of his time living in
England and writing about the English aristocracy) might have the
intellectual capacity to use that spelling common to the indigenous
peoples when coming up with names (and it is, by the way, Dorian Gray).
Were Mr. Wilde writing about, God forbid, a beautiful young *American*
boy, I do believe he would have named the lad Dorian _Grey_.
I think, in your efforts to prove yourself both vastly more educated
than myself (and vastly more witty), you have, how do they say in
France - fucked up? Screwed the pooch? Bouffed the bull dog?
Matthew Melmon
ECL...@MVS.OAC.UCLA.EDU (Jack B. Nimble) wrote:
> >>>S 9 b g- l y+ z++! n o++! a++! u+ v++! j++!
> >
> >WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN?
> >AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
> >
> Don't fret about it, Hon. It's only a misplaced line of C code.
You *evil* brute (not that I couldn't help thinking that myself...).
Anyway, there is a muffin who recently asked me (quite brave for
the lad to come to the Dread *X*, don't you think?) where the
best clubs in Los Angeles were. I haven't been down there in
years. Is _Rage_ still all the rage? How's Westwood for pink
night life, nowadays?
*X*
Arnold Zwicky
the legumes, and the creamy substance. no, four, since i've
already allowed for a certain latitude in the choice of grated
cheese. [there will be *no* little red uniforms, not to
mention fanatical devotion to the pope.]
different curry powders give a wide variety of results, from the most
delicate and subtle to the fieriest, and with many different overtones
and undertones: earthy, cinnamony, sweet, and so on.
i've never tried it with anything except limas, but i'd be willing to
bet on chick peas, or how do you like them garbanzos, fella. favas
might work too. [warning: some folks of mediterranean extraction
suffer from favism, a life-threatening sensitivity to fava beans. my
man jacques's mother - from southern france - was quite sick a couple
of summers ago, apparently from breathing fava *pollen* while she was
working in the garden.]
sour cream is a possible substitute for the [heavy sweet] cream,
but it makes a *seriously* sour dish (unless you cut down on the
lime juice).
variations are such fun, no?
arnold (who just got a letter that took over a month to go by air
from london to columbus to palo alto, arriving here stamped
MISSENT TO BANGKOK, and who is astonished that postal services
have stamps for just this purpose, but who realizes that none
of this has anything to do with cold curried lima beans)
John Dorrance
>In article <thaaang.730585010@cwis>, tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu (John
>Dorrance) wrote:
>You're *so* *close* to Enlightenment, it's almost painful. One
>day, you will awaken and all will become clear. You will say,
>to yourself (or perhaps you will roll over and say to whomsoever
>is adjacent) - "Hey! It's all a joke! It's all a *sham*"
(wide-eyed) Are you suggesting that I make a habit of sleeping with
people? You *pervert*!!! I go home afterwards.
>> And you failed to respond to my allegations that I get laid more'n
>> you, despite your geographical advantage.
>First, I would - but I'm not yet due for a Righteous Indignation
>Fit. Perhaps if you phrased it in a more absurd manner - like
>"You failed to respond to my allegations that I exercise my
>God-given right to fuck in the streets more than you" I would
>be more likely to throw a RIF.
Well, I *haven't* fucked in the streets yet. Regrettably.
>Perhaps I would have gotten laid last week, but for the unfortunate
>presence of a Sultan Twink... Anyway - maybe you should consider
>the fact that your geographic location can be viewed as a disadvantage
>*or* as an advantage. Whereas I must compete for my tricks, whatever
>comes *your* way ain't got much of a choice, now, does it?
Honey, I'm an oasis, you're a dumpster.
>Adversity makes for fast bed-fellows, eh oui?
NO, I *WILL* *NOT* sleep with you! Unless you're cute.
>(*X*, by the way, is no longer a fake blond. Most of my natural
>dull brown has returned, and only the tippie-most tips retain
>their copper-gold hue. I will, however, soon return to a state
>of fake-dom, once my hair has recovered from the acid bath of
>a previous era)
RAID bleaches hair? Wow... (I'm so sorry to hear you've got head
lice again...)
Matthew Melmon
zwi...@Csli.Stanford.EDU (Arnold Zwicky) wrote:
> variations are such fun, no?
I agree! There's Two Cranes with Fingers Extended, Two Cranes
with Legs Entwined, Two Cranes with One Wing and Opposing Leg
Entwined, Two Cranes with Two Wings and One Leg Entwined, ...
> arnold (who just got a letter...
A letter! In this day and age! How delightfully quaint!
> that took over a month to go by air
Yes, well, *mail* you know...
> from london to columbus to palo alto,
Wow! Kill a tree and burn some fossil fuels. And you teaching
at the Politically Correct Center of the Universe...
> arriving here stamped
Yes, well, stamps are required...
> MISSENT TO BANGKOK
Oh, *that* kind of stamp...
> and who is astonished that postal services have stamps for just this
> purpose
That *is* astonishing!
> but who realizes that none of this has anything to do with cold
> curried lima beans)
Or skaters in Berkeley, for that matter. But gentlemen of a certain
age shouldn't think about young little skaters in Berkeley. It's
obscene.
Arnold Zwicky
spam, spam and spam.
Waitress: Baked beans are off.
Mr Bun: Well can I have spam instead?
Waitress: You mean spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam,
spam, spam?
...
Mr Bun: Yes.
Waitress: Arrggh!
-- politanal
Arnold Zwicky
Scientist: The first thing that Dr Kramer came up with was that
the penguin has a much smaller brain than the man, This postulate
formed the fundamental basis of all his thinking and remained
with him until his death.
Nelson Minar
>warning: some folks of mediterranean extraction suffer from favism, a
>life-threatening sensitivity to fava beans.
This is not to be confused with suffering from "fauvism", a fashion-
threatening malaise. Fauvism is first introduced to the body when a
person dies their hair. For some inexplicable reason, the dye starts
spreading, and the victim's skin starts talking on various hues of
blue, green, and purple.
__
nel...@reed.edu \/ The sully-van vultures are on the prowl
Steve Giammarco
>In article <thaaang.730515063@cwis>, tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu (John
>Dorrance) wrote:
>>
>> ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>>
>> >Oi! I'm feeling phleklempt!
>>
>> It's a wonder you don't short out the computer from saying that.
>> It's 'verklempt', Melba, 'verklempt'!!! Learn it, work it, own it.
>
>how to spell the fucking word? Perhaps when you have outgrown
>for rhetorical expression - like, *acquired* air-headism, as
>opposed to *natural* air-headism.
BZZZT! I'd like to think you would have avoided commentary completely if
you "*knew*" the correct spelling. Methinx you responded like a child
caught with their hand in the cookie jar (or _pants_ if you prefer).
Speaking of clues... would you like to buy one? :)
--
Steve Giammarco/5330 Peterson Lane/Dallas TX 75240
ma...@sdf.lonestar.org
loveyameanit.
Arnold Zwicky
Scientist: Now we've taken this theory one stage further. If we
increase the size of the penguin until it is the same height as
the man and then compare the relative brain size, we now find that
the penguin's brain is still smaller. But, and this is the point,
it is larger than it *was*.
-- 'allo, paint!
Matthew Melmon
Dorrance) wrote:
> NO, I *WILL* *NOT* sleep with you! Unless you're cute.
You *know* what I look like (or the potential exists for you to
know - if the ability doesn't). I am afraid, however, you
are not my type. Is sad how few of my type there seem to be
on this newsgroup. Woe is me, me is woe. Sigh. Mope. I
do wish I had an Italian leather oyster bouffe-chair onto which
I could through myself in despair and wail about how wretched
everything is. All I've got is this old swivel chair, and while
the Squirrel is *rumored* to have put a swivel chair to good use,
I must say they are unspeakable utilitarian beasts of little
romantic value.
adolphson
ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
> Is sad how few of my type there seem to be on this newsgroup.
I'm sure everyone out there knows that we in California and
Arizona have received several times our normal amount of
rain in the past couple of months. Now I don't know about
you all, but I don't think an umbrella by itself provides
adequate protection from the rain. I thought I'd buy
myself a hat today, especially since this weekend promises
to be very wet and I'll be out and about apartment hunting.
But what kind of hat should I buy? I turned for advice
to She Who Knows All, Joan Crawford.
I looked and looked for what she had to say about hats in
her autobiography/beauty tips/cookbook _My Way of Life_.
Here's what I found:
PLAN AND ACCESSORIZE
My rule: Don't buy a dress until you can afford all the
right accessories and if, like me, you can't spend your
life in hair curlers,
Clearly, she didn't have *X* in mind when she wrote this
section of the book.
have a hat made to match. I always
get a yard and a half extra of the fabric I've ordered for
a new dress. Half a yard for gloves and a yard for a turban
or breton. Whatever state my hair is in I can still look
well put together on a few minutes' notice.
Well, that doesn't help much. I just want a hat, not a whole
ensemble *in the same fabric*. Not only would Miss Crawford
have a dress, gloves, and hat made of the same fabric, but
she'd have a matching coat made for long dresses. One of
her, well, let's let Joan tell us in her own words:
One of my fashion trademarks is to have even my shoes
made to match my ensemble. [ed.: this is in addition to
having a purse made to match] Of course it would be
folly to travel in silk shoes,
Can you imagine?!
so I have them covered
in the same silk or fabric with transparent plastic over
that, and they're always spotless. The dust comes off
with a damp sponge.
*That's* why Joan Crawford was Joan Crawford, and I am just
little ol' me.
Arne
Mary Shafer
>the legumes, and the creamy substance.
>different curry powders give a wide variety of results, from the most
>delicate and subtle to the fieriest, and with many different overtones
>and undertones: earthy, cinnamony, sweet, and so on.
>
>i've never tried it with anything except limas, but i'd be willing to
>bet on chick peas, or how do you like them garbanzos, fella. favas
>might work too.
Arnold's curried bean salad reminded me of a quick dish that I've
become fond of.
Sautee some chopped onion in butter until it's translucent. Then add
some curry powder and let it cook briefly, to bring out the flavor
(don't let it scorch--it'll taste nasty). Add some drained, cooked
legumes (garbanzos, lentils, butter beans, etc). Stir them well to
coat them with the butter and warm them. Don't smoosh the beans; this
isn't curry refritos.
Quantities are probably on the order of a tablespoon of butter, a
medium onion, one or two teaspoons of curry powder, and two cups of
legumes (the experienced cook will no doubt realize that the two cups
of legumes may be interpreted as one can of legumes).
The version of this with garbanzos has a proper Indian name, but I
can't remember it. I got the original idea for this recipe from a bag
of beans (Brown Swedes, as I recall) and they obviously took their
inspiration from the Indian dish.
>sour cream is a possible substitute for the [heavy sweet] cream,
>but it makes a *seriously* sour dish (unless you cut down on the
>lime juice).
Now that you mention sour cream, I think that it might go well in this
dish, too.
>variations are such fun, no?
Not just fun, but vital to stave off boredom. Most cooks have a
repertoire of reliable staple recipes; if we made something the same
way every time, think how much larger the repertoire would have to be
to avoid monotony.
--
Mary Shafer DoD #0362 KotFR sha...@ursa-major.spdcc.com
Matthew Melmon
wrote:
> Clearly, she didn't have *X* in mind when she wrote this
> section of the book.
>
> ... have a hat made to match.
Certainly not! I *despise* hats. I *especially* despise *baseball*
*caps*! Every God-damn little fairy who wishes he was still sixteen,
be he eighteen, twenty-one, or fifty-sever - wears a God-damn baseball
cap and I'm SICK of seeing a SEA of fucking BASEBALL caps every time
I go into a God-damn BAR!
In a sign of contempt for this fashion craze, I purchased a gold-
sequined baseball cap ($50.00 - Neiman Marcus). It was/is truly
God-awful, but it does, I suppose, offset nicely a black ensemble.
'Real' hats are scarcely any better. They obscur the hair. And
hair is so much more fun to play with then some damn piece of
hardened felt. Furthermore, hats get in the way of making out.
Nibble, nibble, bump. Nibble, nibble, bump. It is *not* very
romantic.
Hats are for dead movie queens.
Paul Hastings
>ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>>In article <thaaang.730585010@cwis>, tha...@cwis.unomaha.edu (John
>>Dorrance) wrote:
>>> And you failed to respond to my allegations that I get laid more'n
>>> you, despite your geographical advantage.
>
>>First, I would - but I'm not yet due for a Righteous Indignation
>>Fit. Perhaps if you phrased it in a more absurd manner - like
>>"You failed to respond to my allegations that I exercise my
>>God-given right to fuck in the streets more than you" I would
>>be more likely to throw a RIF.
>
>Well, I *haven't* fucked in the streets yet. Regrettably.
Try darkened stairwells. It's *faaaaaaabulous*!
--
Butch Smurf S6 b++ g l y+ z+ n+ o+ x+ a-u v+ j+
It's a smurf thing; I don't understand.
Arnold Zwicky
Scientist: ...Standard IQ tests gave the following results.
The penguins scored badly...
Hoad: These IQ tests were thought to contain an unfair cultural
bias against the penguins. For example, it didn't take into
account the penguins' extremely poor educational system. To
devise a fairer system of tests, a team of researchers spent
eighteen months in Antarctica living like penguins, and subsquently
dying like penguins - only quicker - proving that the penguin
is a clever little sod in his own environment.
Matthew Melmon
Giammarco) wrote:
> BZZZT! I'd like to think you would have avoided commentary completely if
> you "*knew*" the correct spelling.
*OH* *MY* *GOD* - YOU IIIIIIDDDDIOOOTTTT! You *think* (your word,
not mine) Splat Ex Splat would have *avoided* *commentary* *completely*!?
Where have you *been*? What *are* you *on*?
(Shit. And I thought Reaser was having trouble with the obvious.
There is *no* *such* *thing* as "bad commentary" in the World of
Splat. Repeat this to yourself again and again and again. Soon
enough, Enlightenment will be yours. The 'phleklempt' thing goes
back to *last* *summer* - there happens to be an *abundance* of
Yiddish *queens* on this group - they have told me *again* and
*again* what the 'correct' spelling (nevermind the absurdity of
insisting that there is a correct spelling for a Yiddish word)
should be. It is a *sure* *thing*. Do we understand now? Has
Reason pokes it's little head into the rear of your mind?
Oi. I'm feeling phleklempt.)
adolphson
> The 'phleklempt' thing goes
> back to *last* *summer* - there happens to be an *abundance* of
> Yiddish *queens* on this group - they have told me *again* and
> *again* what the 'correct' spelling (nevermind the absurdity of
> insisting that there is a correct spelling for a Yiddish word)
> should be.
If "phleklempt" were a real Yiddish word, it would actually be
pronounced "farklempt". And what's so absurd about the notion
of a correct spelling for a Yiddish word? "Farklempt" would be
spelled fey-pasekh alef-reysh-kuf-lamed-ayen-mem-pey-tes.
Arne
U52...@uicvm.uic.edu
>
>ma...@apple.com (Matthew Melmon) writes:
>
>>Mz Thaang, do acquire a *clue* Do you think, perhaps, that I
>
>fluffy-wuffy cocker spaniel nymph stage. I'll continue maturing in
>this manner until I've become a full-grown vixen. But you, on the
>other hand, are limited to the twinkie track, as outlined in one
>of your previous posts. Once you hit that glass ceiling, baby,
>you've had it. I have no limits. You may kowtow at any time.
>
But, when will you pupate? Can we watch?
Barry Aldridge aka Sylvia Prowler, oh, I'm sorry, Fowler
University of Illi-most boring school on earth-nois at Chicago
(standard disclaimers)
Arnold Zwicky
(i used to hate that phrase in my math textbooks; why do i
tolerate it now? jaded, i guess.)]
here we need to know if you're a vegetarian or not. if so, choose two
or more kinds of veggie-stuff, with textures as different as possible.
possibilities include asparagus, broccoli, carrots, celery, corn,
green beans, peas, pea pods, cabbage / bok choy / napa / chinese
cabbage, kale / mustard greens, mushrooms (of many kinds), fennel,
etc. if not, choose at least one, plus your proteiny stuff; for
reasons which will become clear below, also warm your oven to its
lowest temperature.
i recommend some allium-veggie stuff. plain ole yellow cooking
onions are the default. chop a couple of them.
mix some soy sauce, sesame oil, and dry sherry, plus some grated
black pepper, in a bowl. add chopped fresh ginger for some extra
zing. this will be the marinade for your proteiny-stuff or your
most substantial veg (e.g., broccoli, cabbage, carrots, or fennel).
add the stuff to the marinade and stir. go away and nuzzle your
sweetie, read a chapter of a book, catch the news, whatever.
come back periodically and stir the stuff some more.
heat the wok and here we go...
Bob Donahue
>Certainly not! I *despise* hats. I *especially* despise *baseball*
>*caps*! Every God-damn little fairy who wishes he was still sixteen,
>be he eighteen, twenty-one, or fifty-sever - wears a God-damn baseball
>cap and I'm SICK of seeing a SEA of fucking BASEBALL caps every time
>I go into a God-damn BAR!
BTW - I never did mention that I lost my soc.motss baseball cap
after last year's con. I was so weary after the flight back (and all
the fun I had with people in Portland) that I left it in the cab!
Of cours eI have more than one - but this one was the special
one that was the "test" product from the people who did the silk
screening (the stripes go the other way).
(No this doesn't mean I intend to do another round of
motsswear --- Billy you stop laughing!)
Anyway whoever decides to do the next run of motss.fashion,
be sure to do caps --- look at the screaming endorsement from our
very own net.maladjust!
Oh - and here's the secret for doing them much easier.
If you go with the rainbow design, do them on a patch that is sewed on
as opposed to doing the silk screening directly onto the cap.
That way you're less likely to get rejects. (And if you do the rainbow
thing, always make the yellow band about 50% larger than the rest...
it makes a better blend for orange and green.)
Caps were one of the big sellers 3 years ago. There must
be DOZENS of them out there...
BBC
John Fisher
> And if I was trying to have the last unspoken word, I might point
> out that an author (and one who spent a great deal of his time living in
> England and writing about the English aristocracy) might have the
> intellectual capacity to use that spelling common to the indigenous
> peoples when coming up with names (and it is, by the way, Dorian Gray).
> Were Mr. Wilde writing about, God forbid, a beautiful young *American*
> boy, I do believe he would have named the lad Dorian _Grey_.
I don't understand. The usual spelling of that word in the
UK is `grey'. I thought that in the US `gray' was more
usual.
In any case, names are their own thing.
> I think, in your efforts to prove yourself both vastly more educated
> than myself (and vastly more witty), you have, how do they say in
> France - fucked up? Screwed the pooch? Bouffed the bull dog?
It's ok, Matthew, I guess you've managed to reach 6 out of
10 for annoyance on this thread. I don't expect you'll do
any better, so you may as well move on.
--John
Max Meredith Vasilatos
>Not just fun, but vital to stave off boredom. Most cooks have a
>repertoire of reliable staple recipes; if we made something the same
>way every time, think how much larger the repertoire would have to be
>to avoid monotony.
As long as we're making lists of things about ourselves,
my own repertoire of guaranteed-to-work dishes follows.
(I note in passing that Arnold's cuisine is decidedly, uh,
Californian, whereas Mary-of-the-poundcake is veering in my
beloved and bland New England/Northern European direction).
My specialties:
Roast Pork Loin with Red Cabbage (in wine and brown sugar)
Chicken and Herbs in Sour Cream Sauce on Rice
Boiled Dinner (corned beef, cabbage, carrots, potatoes)
Fish Chowder
Canard a L'Orange
Cornish Game Hens stuffed with Wild Rice
Fried Chicken
Potato Salad
Shepherd's Pie
Lobster
Traditional Turkey Dinner
Casseroles of all sorts
Apple Crisp
Pies of all sorts
Shortcake
Not to mislead you. I cook well and creatively (as does my SO),
but I launched into adulthood well prepared for church suppers
and family gatherings Downeast. It's out of fashion and apparently
pretty bad for you, but I like it. Bland and fatty with lots of
salt, yeah, that's the ticket. :-)
Roger B.A. Klorese
>Fauvism is first introduced to the body when a
>person dies their hair. For some inexplicable reason, the dye starts
>spreading, and the victim's skin starts talking on various hues of
>blue, green, and purple.
...as does his prose.
--
ROGER B.A. KLORESE +1 415 ALL-ARFF
rog...@unpc.QueerNet.ORG {ames,decwrl,pyramid}!sgiblab!unpc!rogerk
"Sometimes you wake up. Sometimes the fall kills you. And sometimes, when
you fall, you fly." -- N. Gaiman
John Dorrance
>But, when will you pupate? Can we watch?
You *are*, darling. In fact, a few of you have actively participated.
Arnold Zwicky
plain alto (consoling himself with gumbo)
Dean Blakeley MD
careful with this dish of technically Creole stew. To achieve a proper
balance I used about 2 pounds of boneless chicken breasts, 1 pound of
large shrimp, 1 pound of smoked sausage and 6 large crawfish as sort of
a garnish. (The part of eating crawfish, though, I still can never
quite get right. Does one suck the head and pinch the tail or pinch
the head and suck the tail.) The rest of the spicings are a bit of a
secret, but I may be convinced to divulge them given the right amount
of begging. The evening was topped off when my SO and I invited a
neighbor (and native New Orleanian) who regaled us with tales of
Mardi Gras and debutante queen balls and their white dresses with long,
white gloves.
Peace
Dr. Bearhug
--
| Dean D Blakeley, MD \\// This ain't no party, this ain't no disco |
| Duke University _\/_ This ain't no fooling around - D. Byrne |
| Center for Health Policy \\// NeXTmail gleefully accepted |
| Durham NC 27710 \/ #include <disclaim.duke.h> |
Lance Hartmann
Lance Hartmann
Gerry West
: > damn clever, if you ask me) [...]
:
It's grAy in America and grEy in England.
^ ^ ^ ^
Gerry West
National University of Singapore
elpw...@nuscc.nus.sg
"So little time... So little to do..." - Oscar Levant