Table Manners in Korea
김현정
many manners that should be kept during the eating. I'll show examples of
them.
- When eating with grown-ups, the younger people pick up the spoon and
chopsticks after the elders.
- Don't hold the spoon and chopsticks at the same time on one hand, always
put one thing on the table while using the other one. And never put them on
the rice bowl.
- Don't eat with the bowl on your hand.
- Always eat your meal after eating your soup. Eat rice, kimchi, soup with
your spoon and eat other side dishes with your chopsticks.
- Don't make a noise while eating. For example, noise that occurs when spoon
or chopsticks hits the bowl.
- It's not appropriate rummaging your meal, alse don't pick out things that
you don't like, and don't shake off the sauce on your meal.
- Make sure that spoons are not allowed to be covered with food, And clean
out the bowl with the rice water after you are done.
- When sharing one big plate with lots of people, it's better to put in the
right amount of the food on your own dish.
- While eating, don't throw the fish bones on the table, instead wrap with
the paper. Always keep the table clean.
- When coughing during the meal, turn your head on the side and cover your
mouth with your hands of handkerchiefs.
- Try to keep the same pace with the person you are eating with.
- When eating with the elders, make sure that the younger person puts down
the spoon and chopsticks after the elders.
- After your meal, put down the spoon and chopsticks in order, fold and put
the napkin on the table.
- Cover your mouth with your hand while using the toothpicks.
Not like other country, Korea especially have a lot of table manners we
could see above. I want to know what kind of culture that other countries
have.
Jongseon SHIN
> In Korea, we have culture to obey and respect the elders. So that we have
> many manners that should be kept during the eating. I'll show examples of
> them.
>
I don't think the list below is not of every Koreans.
> - When eating with grown-ups, the younger people pick up the spoon and
> chopsticks after the elders.
This is popular one. But do you really abide by this rule when you eat
with your parents? How about with your friends (including your SeonBaes
and HuBaes)?
It's now kind of joke at the eating table, don't you think?
>
> - Don't hold the spoon and chopsticks at the same time on one hand, always
> put one thing on the table while using the other one.
> And never put them on the rice bowl.
I never heard of this one.
>
> - Don't eat with the bowl on your hand.
This is popular one.
> - Always eat your meal after eating your soup. Eat rice, kimchi, soup with
> your spoon and eat other side dishes with your chopsticks.
Kimchi with spoon? Are you sure?
> - Don't make a noise while eating. For example, noise that occurs when spoon
> or chopsticks hits the bowl.
> - It's not appropriate rummaging your meal, alse don't pick out things that
> you don't like, and don't shake off the sauce on your meal.
> - Make sure that spoons are not allowed to be covered with food, And clean
> out the bowl with the rice water after you are done.
> - When sharing one big plate with lots of people, it's better to put in the
> right amount of the food on your own dish.
It's actually new one
> - While eating, don't throw the fish bones on the table, instead wrap with
> the paper. Always keep the table clean.
> - When coughing during the meal, turn your head on the side and cover your
> mouth with your hands of handkerchiefs.
This should be universal.
> - Try to keep the same pace with the person you are eating with.
No. We eat like F1 racers.
> - When eating with the elders, make sure that the younger person puts down
> the spoon and chopsticks after the elders.
I never heard of this one.
> - After your meal, put down the spoon and chopsticks in order, fold and put
> the napkin on the table.
I'm sure Napkin is rarely used in Korean traditional table. Or are you
from the royal family?
> - Cover your mouth with your hand while using the toothpicks.
This also can be universal.
> Not like other country, Korea especially have a lot of table manners we
> could see above. I want to know what kind of culture that other countries
> have.
You are exaggerating. There's not that much table manner in Korean
culture. Please don't mystify "oriental culture". It's only misleading.
For foreigners, one big difference would be about "blowing nose" at the
table. Koreans are not accustomed to it. On the other hand, belching is
rather acceptable.
--
SHIN
Zeanie Yoon, Language & Web Services // Notary Public
> 김현정 쓴 글:
>
> > In Korea, we have culture to obey and respect the elders. So that we have
> > many manners that should be kept during the eating. I'll show examples of
> > them.
>
> I don't think the list below is not of every Koreans.
Not all of them are of every Koreans as a couple of them are region-
specific. But I must say most of them are of every Koreans.
> > - When eating with grown-ups, the younger people pick up the spoon and
> > chopsticks after the elders.
>
> This is popular one. But do you really abide by this rule when you eat
> with your parents? How about with your friends (including your SeonBaes
> and HuBaes)?
I observe Korean table manners, and so are my siblings and cousins. I
have been fortunate to be surrounded by those who were educated in
this area. I lament that I see more Koreans now who do not seem to
even know of this beautiful every-day tradition and manners.
> It's now kind of joke at the eating table, don't you think?
>
>
>
> > - Don't hold the spoon and chopsticks at the same time on one hand, always
> > put one thing on the table while using the other one.
> > And never put them on the rice bowl.
>
> I never heard of this one.
Regarding not holding the spoon and chopsticks at the same time in one
hand, it's popular. But this is one of many I do not observe. It is
partly my Chinese cultural background; I picked it up when I grew up
with Chinese. I really shouldn't be doing this.
Regarding not putting utensils on the rice bowl, it's age -specific.
One may not do so in front of elders. Naturally, only the eldest of
those sitting at the table could put utensils on the rice bowl.
On the other hand, I personally was brought up learning exactly what 김현
정 wrote; one shall not place utensils on the rice bowl. In fact, you
shall not place your utensils on any food on the table. You shall not
leave your spoon in your soup. You shall not stick your spoon or
chopsticks in the food. Period. Such are only for the dead. For
instance, you will see spoons and chopsticks stuck into or placed on
the food at the ancestor memorial rites (제사, 차례, etc.)
> > - Don't eat with the bowl on your hand.
>
> This is popular one.
Once again, something I forget not to do because of my Chinese
cultural upbringing with Japanese influence. Having multi-cultural
influence in one family was confusing to me when I was growing up.
Agh.
> > - Always eat your meal after eating your soup. Eat rice, kimchi, soup with
> > your spoon and eat other side dishes with your chopsticks.
>
> Kimchi with spoon? Are you sure?
Ha ha! I think this was more for Northern Korea (as in North Korea
now). Their Kimchis had more juice and whatnot, so I heard. But then
what do I know.
I learned of these exactly the opposite. You shall have a sip of soup
first to wet your spoon. It prevents from rice grains sticking to your
spoon. You dip your chopstick in the soup as well. Most of times we
always had a bowl of shallow clean water. We would dip our utensils in
these bowls of water to wet them. We also had an option to sip this
water using our spoon.
You shall eat rice, soup and stews with a spoon. You shall use
chopsticks for other dishes accordingly.
> > - Don't make a noise while eating. For example, noise that occurs when spoon
> > or chopsticks hits the bowl.
>>
> > - It's not appropriate rummaging your meal, alse don't pick out things that
> > you don't like, and don't shake off the sauce on your meal.
>>
> > - Make sure that spoons are not allowed to be covered with food, And clean
> > out the bowl with the rice water after you are done.
Slightly different for traditional noble Seoulians. I was told to
leave a bit of rice water in bowls. If cleaned out rice water, then
pour a bit of regular water in. I don't know the purpose of this, but
I learned that it makes dish washers job whole a lot easier. Perhaps
it is the gesture begun with such thoughtfulness.
> > - When sharing one big plate with lots of people, it's better to put in the
> > right amount of the food on your own dish.
>
> It's actually new one
I think this is mutual in any culture. Actually, I was told to put a
bit less than you need because it is polite to go back for the second
serving.
Related to this table manner, you shall clean out your dishes and
leave no leftovers. So it only makes sense to put the right amount on
your own dishes to begin with.
> > - While eating, don't throw the fish bones on the table, instead wrap with
> > the paper. Always keep the table clean.
Only if napkins are provided. Ha ha! This is region-specific, I
think.
I speak for Seoulians only: especially if any food that leaves such
rubbish is served, such as fish bones, shrimp shells, clam shells,
etc. there should be a shallow bowl to collect such. You shall use the
receptacle to place fish bones, etc. not the napkin.
Napkins are meant to prevent damages on your clothing due to food
spillage or to clean flakes around your mouth. I wish not to clean my
mouth with the napkin wrapping fish bones. Yuck.
> > - When coughing during the meal, turn your head on the side and cover your
> > mouth with your hands of handkerchiefs.
>
> This should be universal.
>
> > - Try to keep the same pace with the person you are eating with.
This also should be universal.
> No. We eat like F1 racers.
>
> > - When eating with the elders, make sure that the younger person puts down
> > the spoon and chopsticks after the elders.
>
> I never heard of this one.
I have. You shall not start or finish before elders.
> > - After your meal, put down the spoon and chopsticks in order, fold and put
> > the napkin on the table.
>
> I'm sure Napkin is rarely used in Korean traditional table. Or are you
> from the royal family?
It's a general misconception and the wars and the modern media is
partly responsible for it . Napkins were used by "living" people. Only
at the ancestral memorial rites you won't see napkins.
Also, the lower class people used no napkins as their sleeves did the
job. How disgusting is that.
I also was told that in certain regions napkins were not placed on the
lap. Instead, it was placed on the table where utensils were put down.
By keeping this napkin clean even though you keep putting down your
utensils on top of it, you were politely demonstrating how much you
enjoyed the meal.
Ha. I don't know. I guess if you enjoyed the food enough to lick off
all the residue on your spoons and chopsticks, you could keep the
napkin clean. That makes me think of hunger more than appetizing food.
> > - Cover your mouth with your hand while using the toothpicks.
>
> This also can be universal.
Oh, please! Make it universal. I hate to see this anywhere!
> > Not like other country, Korea especially have a lot of table manners we
> > could see above. I want to know what kind of culture that other countries
> > have.
>
> You are exaggerating. There's not that much table manner in Korean
> culture. Please don't mystify "oriental culture". It's only misleading.
I disagree. There are many, many table manners in Korean culture. If
you feel that there is not that much table manner in Korean culture,
in my humble opinion, it is either you already know it because it is
already a part of the culture, or it is because you were never
educated in other table manners.
> For foreigners, one big difference would be about "blowing nose" at the
> table. Koreans are not accustomed to it. On the other hand, belching is
> rather acceptable.
Both of which I find disgusting.
>
> --
> SHIN
Regarding tables manners in foreign countries, I speak for myself and
my own experiences only:
I believe I was in Northern part of China in the city I do not
remember. I was provided with snacks that included peanuts and
chestnuts. I was supposed to make a big mess out of it. In fact, I was
supposed to make a big mess out of anything nut family (no pun
intended). I learnt later that making a mess is a polite way to say "I
really enjoyed the meal."
In Hong Kong, you shall place your rice bowl in your hand.
In China, you shall always cover your soups with the cover that comes
with the bowl. You shall not (or at least try not to) let the steam
run out.
You shall not call the waitperson out loud if you need something.
Instead, you shall half-open the cover of your teapot. A trained
waitperson will always ask you if you are in need of something. But
these days, this means that you need either more tea or you are done
with the meal. So it doesn't seem to work universally any more.
You shall make slurping sounds when you drink the soup. (Personally -
yuck!)
Yoon
TAL...@gmail.com
taught most of my table manners in England, with some input from my
father's foreign students when I was older. I find most of the Korean
table customs I have encountered so far feel very natural when I think
to practice them, though I am rarely where anyone would notice.
I would like to offer my comments on a few things here.
> > > - Don't hold the spoon and chopsticks at the same time on one hand, always
> > > put one thing on the table while using the other one.
> > > And never put them on the rice bowl.
I cannot think how to comfortable hold both a sppon and chopsticks in
one hand, so this is one I don't have to think about remembering.
However, when you mention not putting either of them on the rice bowl
are you refering to a rice bowl that serves more than one person? In
most restaurants here in Texas, each person is given their own rice
bowl. Would it be acceptable to rest the chopsticks across the top of
the bowl's rim in this situation? Even with a personal rice bowl I
would never consider leaving them stuck in the rice itself, even
before I learned the practice related to memorials for the dead.
> > > - Don't make a noise while eating. For example, noise that occurs when spoon
> > > or chopsticks hits the bowl.
> > > - It's not appropriate rummaging your meal, alse don't pick out things that
> > > you don't like, and don't shake off the sauce on your meal.
My mother (from the southern USA) would not endure anyone making such
noises or picking at their food. Its not consider polite here
either. However we have gotten more tolerant about people picking
things out and setting them to one side or scraping sauces off their
food because of the vast differences in diets and tastes.
> I speak for Seoulians only: especially if any food that leaves such
> rubbish is served, such as fish bones, shrimp shells, clam shells,
> etc. there should be a shallow bowl to collect such. You shall use the
> receptacle to place fish bones, etc. not the napkin.
This is why all formal place settings in Europe and America have "bone
plates". They are small plates with a slightly raised edge contain
any liquid and the should be shaped to nestle against the side of a
dinner plate.
> > > - When coughing during the meal, turn your head on the side and cover your
> > > mouth with your hands of handkerchiefs.
> > This should be universal.
As far as I know this IS universal.
> > > - Cover your mouth with your hand while using the toothpicks.
> > This also can be universal.
> Oh, please! Make it universal. I hate to see this anywhere!
> > For foreigners, one big difference would be about "blowing nose" at the
> > table. Koreans are not accustomed to it. On the other hand, belching is
> > rather acceptable.
I was taught you do not use toothpicks in public, at the table or
anywhere else. If absolutely necessary, at least cover your mouth
with your hand. Blowing your nose was absolutely forbidden at the
table, or even in the same room where people were eating. You are to
excuse yourself from the table and go elsewhere for this. Fortunately
I have not encountered any culture were it was acceptable to do this
at a dining table.
Belching, well its not considered polite in the USA, but many people
do so and then point out that other customs in Europe and Asia
consider it a compliment to the cook.
> You shall not call the waitperson out loud if you need something.
> Instead, you shall half-open the cover of your teapot. A trained
> waitperson will always ask you if you are in need of something. But
> these days, this means that you need either more tea or you are done
> with the meal. So it doesn't seem to work universally any more.
I wish it did still work, even if only to signal that more tea is
needed. When the tea pot is empty, I am not happy. One of my
favorite Japanese restaurants here has learned to bring me a pot,
though they serve most non-asians only a large cup when they order
tea. It did not take long for them to realize that even though I
never touched the glass of ice water that is customarily served, they
were constantly having to refill my teacup.
TalN
Zeanie Yoon, Language & Web Services // Notary Public
> > > > - Don't hold the spoon and chopsticks at the same time on one hand, always
> > > > put one thing on the table while using the other one.
> > > > And never put them on the rice bowl.
>
> I cannot think how to comfortable hold both a sppon and chopsticks in
> one hand, so this is one I don't have to think about remembering.
> However, when you mention not putting either of them on the rice bowl
> are you refering to a rice bowl that serves more than one person? In
> most restaurants here in Texas, each person is given their own rice
> bowl. Would it be acceptable to rest the chopsticks across the top of
> the bowl's rim in this situation? Even with a personal rice bowl I
> would never consider leaving them stuck in the rice itself, even
> before I learned the practice related to memorials for the dead.
Whether across the top of the bowl or in it, it is not appropriate to
rest any utensil in such manner. Such practice is to be performed only
at traditional memorial services, i.e. for dead people. If you have a
chance to witness Korean rituals that honour their ancestors, such as
memorial services, you will see the descendants placing spoons and/or
chopsticks on top of bowls or inside them.
But then, you will also see Koreans who ignore this table manner. I
take myself as an example; I grew up under Chinese cultural influence,
an area where people place their chopsticks on rice bowls and holding
both chopsticks and spoons in one hand. I've seen Koreans from
southern area doing that a lot too.
> > > > - Don't make a noise while eating. For example, noise that occurs when spoon
> > > > or chopsticks hits the bowl.
> > > > - It's not appropriate rummaging your meal, alse don't pick out things that
> > > > you don't like, and don't shake off the sauce on your meal.
>
> My mother (from the southern USA) would not endure anyone making such
> noises or picking at their food. Its not consider polite here
> either. However we have gotten more tolerant about people picking
> things out and setting them to one side or scraping sauces off their
> food because of the vast differences in diets and tastes.
While most of Koreans do not intentionally make noises, it doesn't
seemed to be considered rude either. It bothers me in great deal, but
it's culture that needs to be respected.
The more I think about Korean table manners, the more rules I find as
many as exceptions I can think of. Whoa.