Hannukah For Dhimmis
Michael Ejercito
Hanukkah for Dhimmis (excuse us, Dummies)
by Bill Levinson (originally posted in December 2006)
Hanukkah is often called “the Jewish Christmas” because it takes place
at about the same time of year. There is in fact a very strong
connection between the two holidays; had it not been for the events
that Hanukkah commemorates, there would be no Christmas. Hanukkah is
about standing up to those who menace one’s home, family, or way of
life as opposed to singing “Kumbaya” with them.
We have often pointed out that science fiction and fantasy societies
are based on real human societies, and the one in Battlestar Galactica
is no exception. We suspect that it is an alternate history in which
Michael Lerner of Tikkun.org and Eric Yoffie of the United “American”
“Hebrew” Congregations (now the Center for Reform Judaism) were in
charge of the Jewish people when the Greeks demanded that the Jews
worship the Greek idols. As stated by Yoffie at the Million Mom March
rally in 2000,
We’re going to find out who’s getting NRA funds, and benefiting
from NRA ads, and we’re going to vote for the other guy. The American
people, I believe, are ready for a leader who will take on the
fanatics and support sensible gun control. …Controlling guns is not
only a political matter, it is a solemn religious obligation. Our gun-
flooded society has turned weapons into idols, and the worship of
idols must be recognized for what it is-blasphemy.
With “Jewish” leadership like this, of course, the Maccabees–who would
probably have been jailed by the Yoffie-led Hebrews for owning
unlicensed and unregistered swords–would have lost the war, and the ex-
Jews would then have ended up worshiping genuine honest-to-the-gods
graven images. The result would have been a space-faring civilization
like that in Battlestar Galactica, where spaceship pilots carry little
Greek idols to which they pray on a regular basis. Jesus would then
have been an idol-worshiper like everyone else, and the Christian
religion would have never existed.
Hanukkah is therefore about defending one’s home, family, and country:
a concept totally repugnant to the Kumbaya-singers. The war between
the Maccabees and the Greeks was only the first in which Jews had to
fight for their survival.
# Two thousand or so years later, Minutemen used privately-owned
firearms in the American War of Independence to create a country with
freedom of religion. Many Jews emigrated from Europe and came to
America so they could practice Judaism without having to worry about
pogroms by Inquisitions, Cossacks, and the like.
# In 1943, Jews in the Warsaw Ghetto revolted against the Nazis. “The
first armed resistance occurred when a 17- year-old [”idolator” and
“fanatic” per Eric Yoffie] named Emily Landau flung a grenade into a
cluster of SS men from a rooftop on Gesia Street, killing or wounding
a dozen of them. The SS promptly assaulted the building with
submachine guns blazing, only to be met by a volley of return fire
that felled four or five Germans and drove the rest back in disorder.
Emily Landau was bending down to recover a pistol from a slain SS
officer when she was struck by a bullet fired by a German rifleman
covering his comrades’ retreat. [She died trying to recover an “idol,”
which proves her a fanatic, right, UAHC?] The first to fight, she was
also the first to die” (Jon Guttmann, “Genocide Delayed”).
# In 1947, Jews founded the Nation of Israel in the face of immense
hardships. Its Arab neighbors invaded so the “idolators and fanatics”
fought back desperately with whatever firearms they could buy, beg,
borrow, or steal. If it had been up to Yoffie and the Union of
“American” “Hebrew” Congregations, the Arabs would have overrun the
Jews and thrown them into the sea. (Recommended viewing: “Cast a Giant
Shadow” with Kirk Douglas as Col. Mickey Marcus.)
Physical cowardice and elitism are the elephants in the gun
controllers’ living room, the ones that everyone knows about but no
one wants to acknowledge. Ownership of a weapon requires the implicit
acceptance of the idea that one may have to fight and possibly die to
protect oneself or those for whose safety one is responsible: an idea
that is repugnant to the typical gun control supporter or Kumbaya-
singer (and the two usually go hand in hand).
This position is reinforced by the fact that some societies actually
required their gentry to carry or at least own weapons, as an explicit
symbol of their responsibility to defend that society. We therefore
recommend that the gun control movement replace its handgun with a red
line through it with a white feather. We recommend, in fact, that gun
registration and confiscation advocates send one another white
feathers by way of greeting, perhaps on September 30 (the anniversary
of Neville Chamberlain’s Munich agreement with Adolf Hitler).
The bottom line was stated in a movie about the life of Jesus: “Those
who live by the sword kill those who have no swords and go on living.”
History’s most vicious conquerors and genocidal maniacs have indeed
lived quite well by the sword unless and until they picked a fight
with the wrong people, who invariably also had swords as opposed to
flowers and peace signs.
Some gun control supporters are, however, former police officers and
soldiers; people who are obviously not afraid to bear arms. Their
position is apparently that of elitist medieval overlords who wanted a
monopoly on the means of violence. There were times when feudal Japan
banned commoners from owning even knives–not to control crime, of
which there is relatively little in Japanese society, but to prevent
the commoners from defending themselves against sword-wielding
samurai. Medieval knights similarly hated the crossbow, which allowed
a commoner to shoot even the bluest-blooded nobleman from his saddle.
Finally we have elitist cowards like Ted Kennedy and Rosie O’Donnell.
Both employ armed bodyguards while demanding strict gun laws for
commoners. As elitists, they want a monopoly on the means of violence.
As cowards, they are unwilling to bear arms themselves. Niccolo
Machievelli wrote a long time ago that you cannot pay a man enough to
die for you, but O’Donnell and Kennedy apparently think otherwise. (We
add in 2008 that Governor Rod Blagojevich of Illinois, who has
allegedly tried to sell Barack Obama’s Senate seat, also opposes gun
ownership by law-abiding people. If he is found guilty beyond a
reasonable doubt, he will be just one more common criminal who doesn’t
want honest people to own guns.)
On a larger scale, the Kumbaya-singers want to disarm the world’s
democracies to avoid “threatening” tin-pot dictatorships like North
Korea and Iran. The Kumbaya-singers think it’s fine and dandy for
those dictatorships to have the means of killing millions of innocent
people, because they assume that Kim Jong Il and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
are Kumbaya-singers just like Jimmy Carter and themselves. This is of
course a manifestation of their personal cowardice, because they are
afraid to even think that Kim Jong Il and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad might
actually set off a nuclear weapon in New York City or Los Angeles. As
Herman Kahn wrote of nuclear war, refusal to think about the
unthinkable makes the unthinkable not only thinkable, but likely.
A large number of Christians are starting to point out that Christmas
is not about shopping malls, plastic Santas, and so on. It is past
time for Jews to remember what Hanukkah is really about, and it has
very little to do with anything the Jewish Left represents.