Oh, Jake.
James C. Woodard
jake
<gwy...@aracnet.com> wrote:
>http://www.aracnet.com/~gwyddon/happy.htm
Hey Jim! How'd you know I always wanted to look like that?
Never could, never did, never will -- but the wanting is still there
nonetheless. :)
thanks for the greeting -- you're too kind.
--jake
James C. Woodard
jake wrote in message <37569ee8...@news.erols.com>...
image that I have of most of the female posters to this newsgroup. I think
that this is an archtypical female spiritual persona.
Jim(sometimes white horses are also involved) Woodard
Broomhildaa
of SCI?
Broomhildaa
----------
In article <7j648q$bs7$1...@spitting-spider.aracnet.com>, "James C. Woodard"
<gwy...@aracnet.com> wrote:
James C. Woodard
jake
<gwy...@aracnet.com> wrote:
>
>Broomhildaa wrote in message <37585...@nntp.connection.com>...
>>That was sweet of you doing that for Jake. Do you do that for all the
>ladies
>>of SCI?
>Sometimes I even write poems.
When you get to Peter O'Stuart status, though....I'm leaving the
country.
--jake the legs will only take *so much* wobbling broad
James C. Woodard
Laura
>jake wrote in message <37591adb...@news.erols.com>...
>>When you get to Peter O'Stuart status, though....I'm leaving the country.
>>
>>--jake the legs will only take *so much* wobbling broad
>
>I rub more interesting places than butts.
>Jim
I can't believe I just read that.
--
Laura
~~~~~
"Help me live for good tommorow
Today's too late and full of sorrow."
"Mansions" - Burlap to Cashmere
jake
>James C. Woodard wrote...
>>jake wrote in message <37591adb...@news.erols.com>...
>
>
>>>When you get to Peter O'Stuart status, though....I'm leaving the country.
>>>
>>>--jake the legs will only take *so much* wobbling broad
>>
>>I rub more interesting places than butts.
>>Jim
>
>
>I can't believe I just read that.
We just keep sinking to new *lows*, Laura.
--jake ;
Laura
>>>>When you get to Peter O'Stuart status, though....I'm leaving the
country.
>>>>
>>>>--jake the legs will only take *so much* wobbling broad
>>>
>>>I rub more interesting places than butts.
>>>Jim
>>
>>
>>I can't believe I just read that.
>
>We just keep sinking to new *lows*, Laura.
>
>--jake ;
Shameless. You people make me blush.
Xbelfast
>We just keep sinking to new *lows*, Laura.
We as in the NG or just youze two........ LOL
side that it kepps a nice little edge on things don ya tink
Xbelfast
SADS
jake
>
>Shameless. You people make me blush.
Yeah, right. Aren't you the chick who opening asked Breathnac, (shy,
innocent young lad that he is, fresh from the bossom of his ma and
family, a stranger in a strange land)-- YOU ask "Can I shag ya?"
Blush indeed -- hussy.
--jake
Laura
OkOk. Shag isn't the in style anymore, and I admit, I was trying to get some
of our back inventory out of the factory. You caught me. I knew that him
being a culchie, he'd fall for the shag carpet and think it was the height
of fashion. But evidently he's been hanging out with some bourgeois culchies
and he figured it out anyway.
Where is Bren V. when I need him?
jake
>jake wrote in message <375aa8ea...@news.erols.com>...
>>On Sat, 5 Jun 1999 22:17:25 -0400, "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> wrote:
>>
>>>
>>>Shameless. You people make me blush.
>>
>>Yeah, right. Aren't you the chick who opening asked Breathnac, (shy,
>>innocent young lad that he is, fresh from the bossom of his ma and
>>family, a stranger in a strange land)-- YOU ask "Can I shag ya?"
>>Blush indeed -- hussy.
>
>
>OkOk. Shag isn't the in style anymore, and I admit, I was trying to get some
>of our back inventory out of the factory. You caught me. I knew that him
>being a culchie, he'd fall for the shag carpet and think it was the height
>of fashion. But evidently he's been hanging out with some bourgeois culchies
>and he figured it out anyway.
>Where is Bren V. when I need him?
Inventing the plush pile and hoping someone will make something of
*that*.....
--jake
Bren
I'm right here Laura and bedamned if you aren't after attracting my attention!
Sure, I'll be glad to head on down and have a good look at your carpet, it'd
be (mostly) my pleasure. Of course I'd want a free sample or two to spend
some time feeling it and stroking it to see if it's of good quality
before I decide if I want to lay it or not.
bren, be warned I drive a hard, ah, bargain....
James C. Woodard
jake wrote in message <375ab7d3...@news.erols.com>...
>Inventing the plush pile and hoping someone will make something of
>*that*.....
>
>--jake
Jim
Laura
>I'm right here Laura and bedamned if you aren't after attracting my
attention!
>Sure, I'll be glad to head on down and have a good look at your carpet,
it'd
>be (mostly) my pleasure. Of course I'd want a free sample or two to spend
>some time feeling it and stroking it to see if it's of good quality
>before I decide if I want to lay it or not.
>
>bren, be warned I drive a hard, ah, bargain....
Rug burns the sign of good house keeping at your place, eh?
Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile. I am
an innocent afterall.
Laura
>On Sun, 6 Jun 1999 19:11:06 -0400, "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> wrote:
>>Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile. I
am
>>an innocent afterall.
>
>Bull-pooping turds.
Nonsense. I don't get as big as a bull unless I'm retaining water.
Peter O'Stuart
jake wrote:
> --jake (Wait til you get pregnant. I felt like a beached whale.)
Eh, you are heavy with child???? Oh frabjous day, calloh, callah!
--
Pete 'twas brillig, and the Slithy Toves.... Stuart
Laura
>>>On Sun, 6 Jun 1999 19:11:06 -0400, "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> wrote:
>>>>Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile.
I am
>>>>an innocent afterall.
>>>Bull-pooping turds.
>>Nonsense. I don't get as big as a bull unless I'm retaining water.
>ROTFLMAO. Honestly Laura. I needed a laugh!
>
>--jake (Wait til you get pregnant. I felt like a beached whale.)
I defer to you on this one. I don't intend to get pregnant. And watching
pregnant women is the best birth control on earth, bless them. My best
friend just had a babbie, and the last month her innie was an outie. I would
holler at her at inopportune times:
"Let the kid out! He wants out! You can see his nose! Point him in the right
direction!"
Everyone would laugh. I was cruel. The worst part is that when she gets mad,
her hips shake a little, which means while pregnant, her whole belly shook.
It just made it funnier.
No, I will not get pregnant. I couldn't handle the abuse. I'm in for it.
--
Laura (hope you're OK)
~~~~~
"Help me live for good tomorrow
jake
>Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile. I am
>an innocent afterall.
Bull-pooping turds.
--jake
jake
>jake wrote in message <375b0cd0...@news.erols.com>...
jake
>I defer to you on this one. I don't intend to get pregnant. And watching
>pregnant women is the best birth control on earth, bless them. My best
>friend just had a babbie, and the last month her innie was an outie. I would
>holler at her at inopportune times:
>
>"Let the kid out! He wants out! You can see his nose! Point him in the right
>direction!"
I had a really "deep" innie before pregnancy. I couldn't "believe"
how "outtie" it could get! It reverts, however, after everything
"realigns" itself again. A wonderful surgeon friend of mine took my
nasty gall bladder out a few years back...since I had the laperscopic
procedure, he tacked up the button a bit when he exited.
I can just hear the *ploinks* now.....sorry guys. I KNOW we're off
topic. But one has to make allowance for tired women on a Sunday
night, huh?
>Laura (hope you're OK)
Well, I'm not pregnant -- so I'm terrific. 'Been there, done that'
just doesn't fully capture the relief, however.
--jake
Sutal
mention "breastfeeding".
>--jake warned laura (Wait til you get pregnant. I felt like a beached
whale.)
What is REALLY fun is to float around on an air mattress on your back with your
tummy exposed to the sun so the baby can feel all those warm sunrays. THAT is
when the whale analogy really works. Not a beached whale, just a breaching
one, I guess. (Good thing there weren't any Makahs hanging around the lake
back then.)
Being preggers was a blast, I loved it and felt beautiful, even when enormous.
OK. I'm lying. Sometimes I felt like a clumsy bear.
I liked the nice tummy ledge to use to write my checks on at the grocery
store. And you could even set a coffee cup there if you were careful - just to
be funny...until the baby kicked and it spilled all over you. Yep, them were
the good old days.
Now you watch them driving off in cars to do all sorts of dangerous things and
you think about how great it was when you could just hold them in your arms and
rock them to sleep.
The young- mom days were good, when you never had to worry about where they'd
lay their weary heads. You knew that every night you would tuck clowny
blankey next to their chubby faces and you'd stroke their soft hair until they
were good and asleep. Then you would stand by their cribs and you'd stare and
stare at them, wondering how anything on this earth could have become so
incredibly precious to you.
Now, you find yourself wanting to send "clowny blankie" with them on their
journeys ... but instead you just have to send your prayers.
Still and all, I wouldn't trade being a mom and all that it has been for that
slender figure that once seemed so important. Its been a rollercoaster ride
I've never regretted, and one that apparently won't end until I die! :o)
oh - you weren't talking about this? pardon meeeeeeee.
*An Innocent Bystander*
Breathnac
In Ireland we have lots of terms for hard men. Toughs. Hard Chaws. That post
would bring a tear to their eyes.
Breathnach
Bren
"Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
> Bren wrote in message <7jel28$e2m$2...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>
>>I'm right here Laura and bedamned if you aren't after attracting my
> attention!
>>Sure, I'll be glad to head on down and have a good look at your carpet,
> it'd
>>be (mostly) my pleasure. Of course I'd want a free sample or two to spend
>>some time feeling it and stroking it to see if it's of good quality
>>before I decide if I want to lay it or not.
>>
>>bren, be warned I drive a hard, ah, bargain....
>
> Rug burns the sign of good house keeping at your place, eh?
>
> an innocent afterall.
Textile innuendo. Sounds damn painful.
Innocent? To quote the great Inigo Montoya, "Ah don sink zat wahrd means
what you sink it means...."
bren
James C. Woodard
Sutal wrote in message <19990607003039...@ng-cr1.aol.com>...
>
>*An Innocent Bystander*
Jim
James C. Woodard
James C. Woodard
the button once I swear.
Jim
James C. Woodard wrote in message
<7jfsub$dr8$1...@spitting-spider.aracnet.com>...
K. E. Dennis
[snip observations on pregnancy & motherhood]
>Now you watch them driving off in cars to do all sorts of dangerous things and
>you think about how great it was when you could just hold them in your arms and
>rock them to sleep.
>
>The young- mom days were good, when you never had to worry about where they'd
>lay their weary heads. You knew that every night you would tuck clowny
>blankey next to their chubby faces and you'd stroke their soft hair until they
>were good and asleep. Then you would stand by their cribs and you'd stare and
>stare at them, wondering how anything on this earth could have become so
>incredibly precious to you.
>
>Now, you find yourself wanting to send "clowny blankie" with them on their
>journeys ... but instead you just have to send your prayers.
``````````
Lá Chéad Chomaoineach / First Communion
Nuala Ní Dhomhnaill
The Astrakhan Cloak
pub. 1992, The Gallery Press
Paul Muldoon, trans.
``````````
Lá Chéad Chomaoineach
Ar ndóigh táimid déanach. Sleamhnaíid isteach sa phiú deireanach
i mbun an tsáipéil, an cailín beag sa ghúna bán ar an ngrua.
Tá an t-iomann iontrála thart is daoine ag rá an ghnímh airthrí:
A Thiarna déan trócaire, éist le mo ghuí is ná stop do chluais.
Sliochtanna as an mBíobla, an Chré is an Phaidir Eocaraisteach,
gaibheann siad trím chroí ar eiteoga, mar ghlór toirní i stoirm.
Tá an cór ag canadh 'Hósana ins na hardaibh',
gur ag Críost an síol, is ina iothlann go dtugtar sinn.
Is tá an mórshiúl Commaoineach de gharsúin is de ghearrchailí beaga
ina ngúnaí cadáis nó a gcultacha le rosette is bonn
ar chuma ealta mhín mhacánta d'éanlaithe feirme
á seoladh faoin bhfásach gan tréadaí ná aoire ina mbun.
Agus is mise an bhean go dubhach ag áireamh a cuid géanna sa mbealach,
Ag gol is ag gárthaíl, ag lógóireacht don méid a théann ar fán,
iad á stracadh ó chéile ag sionnaigh is mic tíre ár linne -- an tsaint,
druganna, ailse, gnáthghníomhartha fill is timpistí gluasisteán.
Deinim seó bóthair dínn. Tarrac beag mear ar mo sciorta.
'A Mhaimi, a Mhaimi, canathaobh go bhfuileann tú ag gol?'
Insím deargéitheach: 'Toisc go bhfuil mo chroí ag pléascadh
Le teann bróid is mórtais ar lá do chomaoineach, a chuid,'
mar ag féachaint ar an ealta bhán de chailíní beaga,
gach duine acu ina coinnleoir óir ar bhord na banríona,
conas a inseod di i dtaobh an tsaoil atá roimpi,
i dtaobh na coircheachta go gcaithfidh sí siúl tríd
ina haonar, de mo dheargainneoin, is le mo neamhthoil?
``````````
First Communion [Paul Muldoon, trans.]
Fashionably late, as usual, we slide into the last pew,
my daughter in her white communion dress.
The entrance hymn is over. They're half-way through
their 'Hear our prayers, O Lord, have mercy on us.'
The Epistle and Gospel, the Creed, the Eucharist
are thunder-claps going clean
through my heart. 'Hosanna in the highest,'
the choir sings, it is Christ's to sow, to reap, to glean.
The Communion procession of little men
and women in cotton frocks or suits with rosettes and medals
look for all the world like a flock of hens
left to fend for themselves in the middle
of nowhere: I myself am the woman in the road who vexes
over her gaggle of geese, over all those slashed
and burned by our latter-day foxes
and wolves -- greed, drugs, cancer, skulduggery, the car-crash.
I make a holy show of us. There's a little tug at my skirt:
'Mammy, why are you moaning?'
'Because,' I bite my tongue, 'because my heart
is filled with pride and joy on the day of your First Communion.'
When I look at the little white girl-host
comelier than golden candlesticks at Mother Mary's feet
what can I tell her of the vast void
through which she must wander alone, over my dead body?
``````````
respectfully submitted,
|K.E. Dennis den...@mail.montclair.edu
|My employer is not responsible for my opinions,
|regardless of how sensible they are.
Laura
>Being preggers was a blast, I loved it and felt beautiful, even when
enormous.
>OK. I'm lying. Sometimes I felt like a clumsy bear.
Sue, this is why I love you.
--
Laura
~~~~~
"Help me live for good tommorow
jake
<den...@mail.montclair.edu> wrote:
>7 Jun 1999 04:30:39 GMT, Sutal wrote:
>
>[snip observations on pregnancy & motherhood]
>
>Lá Chéad Chomaoineach
>Deinim seó bóthair dínn. Tarrac beag mear ar mo sciorta.
>'A Mhaimi, a Mhaimi, canathaobh go bhfuileann tú ag gol?'
You never forget the tug at your skirts -- the full leg hugs of
yesteryear, that's become the persistent tug at the *heart* now. This
was lovely, Karen. Your shelf must be full indeed. Lucky girl.
--jake
Laura
>> "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
>> Rug burns the sign of good house keeping at your place, eh?
>>
>> Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile. I
am
>> an innocent afterall.
>
>Textile innuendo. Sounds damn painful.
>
>Innocent? To quote the great Inigo Montoya, "Ah don sink zat wahrd means
>what you sink it means...."
That's a wonderful movie. I love the bit in the Pit of Despair.
But OK I must admit that you're right on this one. The word "innocent" was
just secret code for "I'm not good at puns."
--
Laura
~~~~~
"So if you're gonna say goodbye
don't take all damn night
Let it rip! Let it fly!"
Bren
"Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
> Bren wrote in message <7jfrsb$ap$1...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>>> "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
>
>
>>> Rug burns the sign of good house keeping at your place, eh?
>>>
>>> Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile. I
> am
>>> an innocent afterall.
>>
>>Textile innuendo. Sounds damn painful.
>>
>>Innocent? To quote the great Inigo Montoya, "Ah don sink zat wahrd means
>>what you sink it means...."
>
>
> That's a wonderful movie. I love the bit in the Pit of Despair.
Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
> But OK I must admit that you're right on this one. The word "innocent" was
> just secret code for "I'm not good at puns."
Some would say that's a virtue. However, I'm loth to lable anyone virtuous
against their will.
bren, "Mah name iz Inigo Montoya, you keelled my fazer, prepare to die!"
Hockersmith
news:7jl5nu$mcr$4...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk...
> In article <7jkkrk$7ip$4...@news1.alltel.net>,
> "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
> > Bren wrote in message <7jfrsb$ap$1...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
> >>what you sink it means...."
> >
> > That's a wonderful movie. I love the bit in the Pit of Despair.
>
> Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
> college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
> was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
>
> > But OK I must admit that you're right on this one. The word "innocent"
was
> > just secret code for "I'm not good at puns."
>
> Some would say that's a virtue. However, I'm loth to lable anyone virtuous
> against their will.
>
> bren, "Mah name iz Inigo Montoya, you keelled my fazer, prepare to die!"
I was a fan of the ROUS's and the loved the line "This is *true love*, do
you think this happens everyday?"...but I have to admit the one scene that I
find hysterically funny is the wedding ......."Maaaawidge".
Kate("Wuv...Twuuuuu Wuv")H
James C. Woodard
Bren wrote in message <7jl5nu$mcr$4...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>In article <7jkkrk$7ip$4...@news1.alltel.net>,
> "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
>> Bren wrote in message <7jfrsb$ap$1...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>>
>>
>>>> Rug burns the sign of good house keeping at your place, eh?
>>>>
>>>> Honestly, I didn't know one could get so much innuendo from a textile.
I
>> am
>>>> an innocent afterall.
>>>
>>>Textile innuendo. Sounds damn painful.
>>>
>>>what you sink it means...."
>>
>>
>> That's a wonderful movie. I love the bit in the Pit of Despair.
>
>Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
>college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
>was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
>
Jim
Bren
"James C. Woodard" <gwy...@aracnet.com> writes:
>
> Bren wrote in message <7jl5nu$mcr$4...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
<snip>
>>Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
>>college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
>>was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
>>
> Who was the director of this film?
> Jim
Rob Reiner.
bren
James C. Woodard
Bren
"Hockersmith" <hock...@internetnw.net> writes:
> Bren <vaug...@ul.ie> wrote in message
> news:7jl5nu$mcr$4...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk...
>> "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
>> > Bren wrote in message <7jfrsb$ap$1...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>> >>Innocent? To quote the great Inigo Montoya, "Ah don sink zat wahrd means
>> >>what you sink it means...."
>> >
>> > That's a wonderful movie. I love the bit in the Pit of Despair.
>>
>> college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
>> was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
>>
> was
>> > just secret code for "I'm not good at puns."
>>
>> Some would say that's a virtue. However, I'm loth to lable anyone virtuous
>> against their will.
>>
>> bren, "Mah name iz Inigo Montoya, you keelled my fazer, prepare to die!"
>
> I was a fan of the ROUS's and the loved the line "This is *true love*, do
> you think this happens everyday?"...but I have to admit the one scene that I
> find hysterically funny is the wedding ......."Maaaawidge".
> Kate("Wuv...Twuuuuu Wuv")H
All the more scary because it could be true. There must be some secret room
in a seminary where they mangle their voiceboxes to maximise the speech
defects while being careful not to minimise the boring elements of the voice.
My favourite priest's voice is done by Pat Shortt of D'Unbelievables. He
has it down to a tee.
bren, "Life is pain, highness! Anyone who says differently is selling
something." - Dread Pirate Roberts.
P.S.
"Ha ha, you fool!! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most
famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia; and only slightly less
well known is this: Never go in against a Sicilian, when death is on the
line!" - The Great Vizzini
Hockersmith
> bren, "Life is pain, highness! Anyone who says differently is selling
> something." - Dread Pirate Roberts.
"As you wish" :)
Oh damn...I was supposed to say that to the other Brendan!!! The one with
the funny, NY/Irish accent...the "farmboy"!!! Where the heck *is* he
anyway?
Kate(I have to rent this movie, with my little one)H
Laura
>>> Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
>>> college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
>>> was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
[snip]
>>> bren, "Mah name iz Inigo Montoya, you keelled my fazer, prepare to die!"
[snip]
>bren, "Life is pain, highness! Anyone who says differently is selling
> something." - Dread Pirate Roberts.
[snip]
>"Ha ha, you fool!! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The
most
>famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia; and only slightly less
>well known is this: Never go in against a Sicilian, when death is on the
>line!" - The Great Vizzini
Baby, please tell me you went back and watched the movie, and that you DONT
have all these lines trapped in your long term memory, screaming to get out.
Bren
"Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
> Bren wrote in message <7jm149$sgh$1...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>
>>>> Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
>>>> college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
>>>> was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
>
>
> [snip]
>
>>>> bren, "Mah name iz Inigo Montoya, you keelled my fazer, prepare to die!"
>
>
> [snip]
>
>>bren, "Life is pain, highness! Anyone who says differently is selling
>> something." - Dread Pirate Roberts.
>
>
> [snip]
>
>>"Ha ha, you fool!! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The
> most
>>famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia; and only slightly less
>>well known is this: Never go in against a Sicilian, when death is on the
>>line!" - The Great Vizzini
>
> Baby, please tell me you went back and watched the movie, and that you DONT
> have all these lines trapped in your long term memory, screaming to get out.
I have snippets really. For the last one I had to consult the script. But I
remember the basic theme of the quote. I have a very weird memory system.
It remembers junk I never wanted perfectly yet refuses to remember stuff I
do every day. I think my brain is wired incorrectly sometimes. For example, I
am generally incapable of discerning rapidly my right from my left. I have to
stop and think very hard and I sometimes still get it wrong due to confusion.
My SO used to think I was putting this on when she first met me but now she
just shakes her head in sorrow everytime I'm giving directions to someone and
unwittingly send them in the wrong direction. I've always wondered if it is
perhaps some form of dyslexia or something and maybe I'm part of a
disadvantaged minority and can get a tax break or something.
I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand "Morris" has
helped somewhat, but not massively.
bren, this would be less funny if it wasn't true....
westprog
vaug...@ul.ie wrote:
...
> I
> am generally incapable of discerning rapidly my right from my left. I
> have to
> stop and think very hard and I sometimes still get it wrong due to
> confusion.
> My SO used to think I was putting this on when she first met me but
> now she
> just shakes her head in sorrow everytime I'm giving directions to
> someone and
> unwittingly send them in the wrong direction.
> I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand
> "Morris" has helped somewhat, but not massively.
Now you just say "Turn Fred at the church, straight on and it's the
third on your Morris"? How does that help?
--
J. (Looking Backward)
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Share what you know. Learn what you don't.
celt...@nospam.access1
>In article <7jlun9$hrh$1...@spitting-spider.aracnet.com>,
> "James C. Woodard" <gwy...@aracnet.com> writes:
>>
>> Bren wrote in message <7jl5nu$mcr$4...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>
><snip>
>
>>>Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
>>>college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
>>>was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
>>>
>> Who was the director of this film?
>> Jim
>
>Rob Reiner.
>
The son of Carl Reiner, famous director/writer/actor and Estelle
Reiner, actor and jazz singer. Rob costarred in All in the Family, a
70's sitcom (which was based on a British sitcom AFAIK) as "The
Meathead" son-in-law.
Rob also directed "This is Spinal Tap," a modern classic film in every
sense.
Bill
Si
> Bren <vaug...@ul.ie> wrote in message
> >
> > bren, "Mah name iz Inigo Montoya, you keelled my fazer, prepare to die!"
>
> I was a fan of the ROUS's and the loved the line "This is *true love*, do
> you think this happens everyday?"...but I have to admit the one scene that I
> find hysterically funny is the wedding ......."Maaaawidge".
> Kate("Wuv...Twuuuuu Wuv")H
>
Euuuck... soppy shites the lot o' ye.. it had the single greatest fencing
scene ever put to film... eh well apart from the cellar scene in 'The
Dualists'.. or The Three Musketeers.. or Basil Rathbone in Robin of
Sherwood... or never mind. I'm off to play with me weapon.
Si,
"Bog Snorkler Extrordinaire"
Bren
westprog <west...@my-deja.com> writes:
> In article <7jo45d$ksk$2...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>,
> vaug...@ul.ie wrote:
> ...
>> I
>> am generally incapable of discerning rapidly my right from my left. I
>> have to
>> stop and think very hard and I sometimes still get it wrong due to
>> confusion.
>> My SO used to think I was putting this on when she first met me but
>> now she
>> just shakes her head in sorrow everytime I'm giving directions to
>> someone and
>> unwittingly send them in the wrong direction.
> ...
>> I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand
>> "Morris" has helped somewhat, but not massively.
>
> Now you just say "Turn Fred at the church, straight on and it's the
> third on your Morris"? How does that help?
>
> --
> J. (Looking Backward)
Nobody ever asks me for directions a second time, so it's a big help.
bren
Hockersmith
The one at the top of the cliff? Where they both fight left handed?
Aha!!! *I'm* not left handed either! Very funny.
Kate(or was it right?)H
MMcC
> In article <7jn3u1$hdl$2...@news1.alltel.net>,
> "Laura" <ebu...@alltel.net> writes:
> > Bren wrote in message <7jm149$sgh$1...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
> >
> >>>> Agreed. Mel Smith's croaky voice. When we were a bunch of pissheads in
> >>>> college, our regular salute when swilling liquor in a single gulp
> >>>> was "To the pain!!". Boy, sometimes it hurt too...
> >
> >
> > [snip]
> >
. I think my brain is wired incorrectly sometimes. For example, I
> am generally incapable of discerning rapidly my right from my left. I have to
> stop and think very hard and I sometimes still get it wrong due to confusion.
> My SO used to think I was putting this on when she first met me but now she
> just shakes her head in sorrow everytime I'm giving directions to someone and
> unwittingly send them in the wrong direction. I've always wondered if it is
> perhaps some form of dyslexia or something and maybe I'm part of a
> disadvantaged minority and can get a tax break or something.
I'm not the only one afflicted with this disease!!!! This has haunted me
for years. It seems like everyone else in the world can rattle off right
from left without a second thought. I have to conciously think about it,
and more often than not I have to look down at my hands. What looking at
my hands does, I don't know, but it seems to aid the process of discerning
left from right. I have wondered too if it's a form of dyslexia.
Maybe it's a Munster thing. Or something to do with living within close
proximity of the Shannon esturary.
I think we should at least get something like special parking spaces
because of our debilitating affliction.
I may also try it as a defense in court someday........ " well ya see, yer
'onor......"
> I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand "Morris" has
> helped somewhat, but not massively.
A big "L" and a big "R" do help quite a bit, except in Spanish of course.
>
> bren, this would be less funny if it wasn't true....
MMcC...... hello, my name is Michael, and I can't tell me left hand from
me fucking right....
Si
> > Euuuck... soppy shites the lot o' ye.. it had the single greatest fencing
> > scene ever put to film... eh well apart from the cellar scene in 'The
> > Dualists'.. or The Three Musketeers.. or Basil Rathbone in Robin of
> > Sherwood... or never mind. I'm off to play with me weapon.
> > Si,
>
> The one at the top of the cliff? Where they both fight left handed?
> Aha!!! *I'm* not left handed either! Very funny.
> Kate(or was it right?)H
>
Twas also pretty good fencing.. Ah should know I'm a coach.
Si,
"Bog Snorkler Extrordinaire"
Bren
in...@earthlink.nettles ( MMcC) writes:
> I'm not the only one afflicted with this disease!!!! This has haunted me
> for years. It seems like everyone else in the world can rattle off right
> from left without a second thought. I have to conciously think about it,
> and more often than not I have to look down at my hands. What looking at
> my hands does, I don't know, but it seems to aid the process of discerning
> left from right. I have wondered too if it's a form of dyslexia.
> Maybe it's a Munster thing. Or something to do with living within close
> proximity of the Shannon esturary.
> I think we should at least get something like special parking spaces
> because of our debilitating affliction.
> I may also try it as a defense in court someday........ " well ya see, yer
> 'onor......"
Yes!! I'm not totally mental! At least, I'm not alone in my insanity! Mind you
I do know one other person who's is similarly afflicted, but not as bad.
Maybe it is a genuine condition? I'll bet there is a course on it in some
US Uni of we check.
>> I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand "Morris" has
>> helped somewhat, but not massively.
>
> A big "L" and a big "R" do help quite a bit, except in Spanish of course.
I have been told to make an L shape with my thumb and first finger, examine
them and I'll see that my left hand makes a valid L for left. This doesn't
help as I'm still standing there like a bollix staring at my hands with a
glazed look on my face. Another thing I notice is that if I decide to go
for a quick guess I'll guess wrong every time. "Which side did my golf ball
go?" "Left!" I'll say pointing to the right.
> MMcC...... hello, my name is Michael, and I can't tell me left hand from
> me fucking right....
Your right Michael, we need a support group. Directionless Anonymous or
something.
bren, at the age of 27 I have my first ever driving lesson this saturday.
Should be a laugh when he asks me to turn right and I put the car through
someone's front window on the left....
P.S. Try Fred and Morris...remember, 4 letters in Fred, 4 letters in Left...
James C. Woodard
Bren wrote in message <7jolnk$op3$2...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>In article <inis-10069...@ip130.austin18.tx.pub-ip.psi.net>,
>
>Your right Michael, we need a support group. Directionless Anonymous or
>something.
>
If you get that support group up and running let me know. My wife is one of
you. Until she was eighteen she thought that north was in front of you
because that's what they told her when they taught her in school to read a
map. Can't find her way out of a paper bag with both ends cut out. If she
hasn't been to a place for some time(no matter how many times she's been
there before), I must give her written step by step instructions, including
landmarks(doesn't seem to be able to drive and read street signs at the same
time). I am sure that a good support group would help her with mnemonic
devices and other coping mechanisms.
Jim
Hockersmith
news:Pine.OSF.4.10.990610...@paris.pegasus.cranfield.ac.uk.
...
Where are you, Si?
KateH
Hockersmith
> bren, at the age of 27 I have my first ever driving lesson this saturday.
> Should be a laugh when he asks me to turn right and I put the car through
> someone's front window on the left....
I can hear your instructor now... "NO!!! Your OTHER RIGHT!!!" :)
I'm teaching my 16 year old to drive a stick and he's hating it. Seriously
has a phobia about 1st gear and stalls in wonderful places...like getting on
the freeway. He's gonna kill us both. He wants to know WHY people still
drive cars like that...when there are automatics. :)
KateH
An Emotional Chip
Bren wrote in message <7jolnk$op3$2...@niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk>...
>P.S. Try Fred and Morris...remember, 4 letters in Fred, 4 letters in
Left...
Ah come on, that's too much like trying to remember which one's Cagney and
which one's Lacey.
Carrie Jean Cochrane
>......I am generally incapable of discerning rapidly my right from my left. I have to
>stop and think very hard and I sometimes still get it wrong due to confusion.
MMcC wrote:
>...... hello, my name is Michael, and I can't tell me left hand from me fucking right....
Oh you guys! *sobbing* Now I don't feel like such a
freak! well...ok.....that part doesn't really
matter...ok...I'm all settled down here in the
circle...uh...do we have to do that thing that I detest
so much?..you know...going around the circle and
telling who you are and all the other embarrassing
fuck-ups you've made all because you don't know your
hands have specific designations?
C.C.
ICQ#9143177
Carrie Jean Cochrane
>I'm teaching my 16 year old to drive a stick and he's hating it. Seriously
>has a phobia about 1st gear and stalls in wonderful places...like getting on
>the freeway. He's gonna kill us both. He wants to know WHY people still
>drive cars like that...when there are automatics. :)
Well I don't know HOW you would do it but tell him that
later he will be so glad he did...I learned on a stick
too..my younger brother and I had a nifty system for
starting out on a hill...the parking brake..rev the
engine..let it go..skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech! hahaha
whooooohooooo! I am glad we were living in the boonies
then....tell him that he can't "bump-start" an
automatic...oh well...that was an important feature for
me at least...I had a slowly dying vehicle for a while
there....
C.C.
ICQ#9143177
Carrie Jean Cochrane
>Euuuck... soppy shites the lot o' ye.. it had the single greatest fencing
>scene ever put to film... eh well apart from the cellar scene in 'The
>Dualists'.. or The Three Musketeers.. or Basil Rathbone in Robin of
>Sherwood... or never mind. I'm off to play with me weapon.
Hmmmmm...what about Scaramouche?
C.C.
ICQ#9143177
ealaaa
>MMcC writes:
>> I'm not the only one afflicted with this disease!!!! This has haunted me
>> for years. It seems like everyone else in the world can rattle off right
>> from left without a second thought. I have to conciously think about it,
>> and more often than not I have to look down at my hands. What looking at
>> my hands does, I don't know, but it seems to aid the process of discerning
>> left from right. I have wondered too if it's a form of dyslexia.
>Yes!! I'm not totally mental! At least, I'm not alone in my insanity! Mind you
>I do know one other person who's is similarly afflicted, but not as bad.
>Maybe it is a genuine condition? I'll bet there is a course on it in some
>US Uni of we check.
[.......]
>Another thing I notice is that if I decide to go
>for a quick guess I'll guess wrong every time. "Which side did my golf ball
>go?" "Left!" I'll say pointing to the right.
Well then the solution is as clear as clear can be!
Simply whirl on your heel 180 degrees as you stretch out your arm to point.
That way you can rely on your instinct and people will only think you have an
unfortunate twirly-type tic. The trickiest part will be remembering to put down
the golf club first.
eala
eala_...@my-deja.com
**Yo! Posts are more than a day behind again!
Can't you techheads FIX anything?
Hockersmith
> In article <92903428...@news.remarq.com>,
> "Hockersmith" <hock...@internetnw.net> writes:
> > I'm teaching my 16 year old to drive a stick and he's hating it.
Seriously
> > has a phobia about 1st gear and stalls in wonderful places...like
getting on
> > the freeway. He's gonna kill us both. He wants to know WHY people
still
> > drive cars like that...when there are automatics. :)
>
> He'll understand when the kids in the stick shifts are burning his ass off
> at the stop lights :)
> bren
....I might not mention that to him. :)
Kate(One Helluva Woman Driver)H
Hockersmith
Carrie Jean Cochrane <c.coc...@MAKETHEworldnet.att.netGOAWAY> wrote > Well
I don't know HOW you would do it but tell him that
> later he will be so glad he did...I learned on a stick
> too..my younger brother and I had a nifty system for
> starting out on a hill...the parking brake..rev the
> engine..let it go..skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech! hahaha
> whooooohooooo! I am glad we were living in the boonies
> then....tell him that he can't "bump-start" an
> automatic...oh well...that was an important feature for
> me at least...I had a slowly dying vehicle for a while
> there....
> C.C.
Yeah.........I had a hill-top VW for a while. If you parked it anywhere but
the top of the hill (not an easy feat in Florida)...you were walking. Loved
cussing that car.
KateH :)
Christian Murphy
>In article <inis-10069...@ip130.austin18.tx.pub-ip.psi.net>,
>
>> I'm not the only one afflicted with this disease!!!! This has haunted me
>> for years. It seems like everyone else in the world can rattle off right
>> from left without a second thought. I have to conciously think about it,
>> and more often than not I have to look down at my hands.
>
I have this as well.
>bren, at the age of 27 I have my first ever driving lesson this saturday.
>Should be a laugh when he asks me to turn right and I put the car through
>someone's front window on the left....
I've been having lessons on and off since February (when I first learned
I was going to the States). At first these were in Munich, so the
instructor would tell me "links", I would then mentally translate that
into "left", _consciously_ think which hand was my left hand and react
accordingly. It made for stressful lessons. Eventually he started
waving his hand instead of telling me to go more to the right or to the
left. "Nicht so nahe an den parkenden Autos" turned out to be a useful
phrase for him ("not so close to the parked cars").
Even in English I sometimes got it wrong if I wasn't thinking
carefully and the instructor would correct me when he saw I was
indicating the wrong way.
It's an annoying affliction. Normally you can talk away without
thinking about it very consciously. Then if you forget to think
it's fifty/fifty whether you get it right or looking like a pratt.
It's one good reason to use your hands a lot when you talk.
Ah well, got my license this week and I get a car tomorrow.
Those are good things to have in American suburbs. (BTW Gerard
was right, the test is much easier than it is in Ireland. For a
start the roads are w i d e.)
Regards,
-christian
ACooper213
>My wife is one of
>you. ..... . Can't find her way out of a paper bag with both ends cut out.
Early in our marriage, we moved to a new town. My wife kept getting lost going
places and coming back. She called home once impatiently asking for clear
directions on how to get back home. I asked her where she was. She replied
(in that voice women get just before they cry) that she didn't have any damned
idea of where she was or she wouldn't be calling.
The next day I made a sign for her to hang around her neck. It said: Hi. My
name is Kate. If lost, return to...............
She was not amused.
Tony
westprog
vaug...@ul.ie wrote:
> In article <inis-10069...@ip130.austin18.tx.pub-ip.psi.net>,
> in...@earthlink.nettles ( MMcC) writes:
>
> > I'm not the only one afflicted with this disease!!!! This has
> > haunted me
> > for years. It seems like everyone else in the world can rattle off
> > right
> > from left without a second thought. I have to conciously think about
> > it,
> > looking at
> > my hands does, I don't know, but it seems to aid the process of
> > discerning
> > left from right. I have wondered too if it's a form of dyslexia.
> > close proximity of the Shannon esturary.
> > I think we should at least get something like special parking spaces
> > because of our debilitating affliction.
Circular, I presume.
> > I may also try it as a defense in court someday........ " well ya
> > see, yer 'onor......"
> Yes!! I'm not totally mental! At least, I'm not alone in my insanity!
> Mind you
> I do know one other person who's is similarly afflicted, but not as
> bad.
> Maybe it is a genuine condition? I'll bet there is a course on it in
> some US Uni of we check.
In the US you could probably register as disabled.
> >> I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand
> >> "Morris" has helped somewhat, but not massively.
> > A big "L" and a big "R" do help quite a bit, except in Spanish of
> > course.
A young Irish couple moved from their small village to London. The first
day there they decided to go shopping. That evening they met back at
their little flat in Balham. The husband said "This is a great place! I
bought some wellies and they were marked 'L' and 'R'." His wife nodded.
"I know. I bought some knickers and they were marked C & A."
...
westprog
James C. Woodard
ACooper213 wrote in message
<19990611004934...@ng-bd1.aol.com>...
for Broadway cab. Now many people, when they call for cabs, think
themselves to be on the corner of "Walk and Don't Walk" or Phone and Booth.
One quickly develops the skill of asking what is on the corner, besides the
little dog eating the puddle of vomit, and determining where they are but
what's on the corner. Every now and then one finds a customer who knows
their street address but it is on a street one is unfamiliar with and one
asks where that street is, to be told you get off the freeway at such and
such and exit turn at the Safeway and again at the church and it's the
second street. Usually these folks, when asked how long they have lived
there, say 5 or 10 years. One really does wonder how some people survive to
adulthood.
Jim
Hockersmith
news:19990611004934...@ng-bd1.aol.com...
> JIM WROTE:
> >My wife is one of
> >you. ..... . Can't find her way out of a paper bag with both ends cut
out.
>
> Early in our marriage, we moved to a new town. My wife kept getting lost
going
> places and coming back. She called home once impatiently asking for clear
> directions on how to get back home. I asked her where she was. She
replied
> (in that voice women get just before they cry) that she didn't have any
damned
> idea of where she was or she wouldn't be calling.
>
> The next day I made a sign for her to hang around her neck. It said: Hi.
My
> name is Kate. If lost, return to...............
>
> She was not amused.
I love that and I need one...only I'm not sure of where I want to be
returned to, yet. :)
Sort've a Paddington Bear, type of affair.
KateH
Hockersmith
news:FD54y...@enteract.com...
> Ah well, got my license this week and I get a car tomorrow.
> Those are good things to have in American suburbs. (BTW Gerard
> was right, the test is much easier than it is in Ireland. For a
> start the roads are w i d e.)
> Regards,
> -christian
Ahhh Christian...you've simultaneously frightened (the livin' daylights out
of) me and made me happy (I'm no where near Chicago)! :)
Congrats!!!
KateH
Hockersmith
> My wife is the same way, luckily when we first married, I was dispatching
> for Broadway cab. Now many people, when they call for cabs, think
> themselves to be on the corner of "Walk and Don't Walk" or Phone and
Booth.
> One quickly develops the skill of asking what is on the corner, besides
the
> little dog eating the puddle of vomit, and determining where they are but
> what's on the corner. Every now and then one finds a customer who knows
> their street address but it is on a street one is unfamiliar with and one
> asks where that street is, to be told you get off the freeway at such and
> such and exit turn at the Safeway and again at the church and it's the
> second street. Usually these folks, when asked how long they have lived
> there, say 5 or 10 years. One really does wonder how some people survive
to
> adulthood.
> Jim
"The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with weary feet,
Until it joins some larger way,
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say."
JRR Tolkien
I can remember being totally amazed when I found out that Pensacola
Avenue...actually went to Pensacola. In Florida you don't need to know
where you are, exactly...if you go too far, you hit the beach. Then it's a
north/south question......unless of course the sun is setting on the beach
instead of rising there, in which case you WILL get grounded when you
eventually DO get home. :)
Islands must be even easier.
KateH
Lisieux
Play Iggy Pop music and get pulled over for driving while cool!
EzeeDuzit
>> news:FD54y...@enteract.com...
>> > Ah well, got my license this week and I get a car tomorrow.
>> > Those are good things to have in American suburbs. (BTW Gerard
>> > was right, the test is much easier than it is in Ireland. For a
>> > start the roads are w i d e.)
>> > Regards,
>> > -christian
>>
>> Ahhh Christian...you've simultaneously frightened (the livin' daylights
>out
>> of) me and made me happy (I'm no where near Chicago)! :)
>> Congrats!!!
>> KateH
Christian, Where about in the Chicago area might you be driving? My 16 year old
just got his license, also. If you run into each other, say hello.
Easy Does IT,
FRANK C.
"Truth Like Football. Get kicked around much, before reaching goal." -Charlie
Chan
James C. Woodard
EzeeDuzit wrote in message <19990612112622...@ng-fi1.aol.com>...
>Christian, Where about in the Chicago area might you be driving? My 16 year
old
>just got his license, also. If you run into each other, say hello.
>
information, perhaps one of the ambulan...er..lawyers could enlighten us.
Jim
jake
<lis...@justinian.idps.co.uk> wrote:
>Hockersmith wrote:
>
>> Christian Murphy <c...@enteract.com> wrote in message
>> news:FD54y...@enteract.com...
>> > Ah well, got my license this week and I get a car tomorrow.
>> > Those are good things to have in American suburbs. (BTW Gerard
>> > was right, the test is much easier than it is in Ireland. For a
>> > start the roads are w i d e.)
>> > Regards,
>> > -christian
>>
>> Ahhh Christian...you've simultaneously frightened (the livin' daylights out
>> of) me and made me happy (I'm no where near Chicago)! :)
>> Congrats!!!
>> KateH
>
>
>
>Play Iggy Pop music and get pulled over for driving while cool!
Profiled....
--jake
MMcC
> In article <inis-10069...@ip130.austin18.tx.pub-ip.psi.net>,
> in...@earthlink.nettles ( MMcC) writes:
>
> > I'm not the only one afflicted with this disease!!!! This has haunted me
> > for years. It seems like everyone else in the world can rattle off right
> > from left without a second thought. I have to conciously think about it,
> > and more often than not I have to look down at my hands. What looking at
> > my hands does, I don't know, but it seems to aid the process of discerning
> > left from right. I have wondered too if it's a form of dyslexia.
> > Maybe it's a Munster thing. Or something to do with living within close
> > proximity of the Shannon esturary.
> > I think we should at least get something like special parking spaces
> > because of our debilitating affliction.
> > I may also try it as a defense in court someday........ " well ya see, yer
> > 'onor......"
>
> Yes!! I'm not totally mental! At least, I'm not alone in my insanity! Mind you
> I do know one other person who's is similarly afflicted, but not as bad.
> Maybe it is a genuine condition? I'll bet there is a course on it in some
> US Uni of we check.
We should start a campaign to encourage others to come out. It wouldn't be
long before we were a monority to be reckoned with and politicans would be
pandering to the directionless vote.
> >> I have found that renaming my left hand "Fred" and my right hand
"Morris" has
> >> helped somewhat, but not massively.
> >
> > A big "L" and a big "R" do help quite a bit, except in Spanish of course.
>
> I have been told to make an L shape with my thumb and first finger, examine
> them and I'll see that my left hand makes a valid L for left. This doesn't
> help as I'm still standing there like a bollix staring at my hands with a
> glazed look on my face.
I tried that too... but it only works if the back of your hand is facing
you. Don't try it palms up or you'll end up going right around the world.
> > MMcC...... hello, my name is Michael, and I can't tell me left hand from
> > me fucking right....
>
> Your right Michael, we need a support group. Directionless Anonymous or
> something.
>
> bren, at the age of 27 I have my first ever driving lesson this saturday.
> Should be a laugh when he asks me to turn right and I put the car through
> someone's front window on the left....
Good luck with it. So how did you survive this long with driving? Didn't
you drive a tractor or anything back home?
Where the whole left/right thing becomes a serious problem is when I go
home. You see over here in the land of Amerikay they drive on the wrong
side of the road. Now when I go back to driving on the right side of the
road, which is actually on the left, as right is wrong and left is right
(are you following me?) the problem becomes doubly compounded. Most of
the time I can figure out which side I supposed to be one from the traffic
coming aginst. But imagine you're pulling out from a side street onto a
main street and you're supposed to turn right. Now not alone do have a
problem deciding in which direction you actually have to turn, but on top
of that you've got to figure out which side of the fucking street you're
supposed to be on when you get out there. It's quite the thrill a minute
for whatever passengers happen to be accompaning me.
> P.S. Try Fred and Morris...remember, 4 letters in Fred, 4 letters in Left...
I tried this yesterday, and almost killed myself. I'm driving on a busy
road and I need to turn right. So I thinks to meself "Fred 4,....... so
lets see, Morris, that's 6". Then I got rightly confused..."6 what?". So I
start staring at both hands looking to see which one has 6 fingers and
almost causing a pile up in the process.
MMcC
ACooper213
>> P.S. Try Fred and Morris...remember, 4 letters in Fred, 4 letters in
>Left...
>
>I tried this yesterday, and almost killed myself. I'm driving on a busy
>road and I need to turn right. So I thinks to meself "Fred 4,.......
They used to say that the Army drill sargeants dealt with our rural boys that
didn't know left from right by making them put some straw in one shoe and some
hay in t'other. They would march singing "Hayfoot, strawfoot, hayfoot,
strawfoot"
in cadence.
Tony
Christian Murphy
>>Kate H. wrote:
>>> Christian Murphy <c...@enteract.com> wrote:
>>> > Ah well, got my license this week and I get a car tomorrow.
>>>
>>>out of) me and made me happy (I'm no where near Chicago)! :)
>>> Congrats!!!
Thanks, Kate!
>Christian, Where about in the Chicago area might you be driving? My 16 year old
>just got his license, also. If you run into each other, say hello.
Northwest suburbs. I'm the one who tries to go the wrong way down
one-way streets and can't parallel park without bumping the pavement.
Regards,
-christian
ACooper213
>So anyways, there we are in naona bheaga, small chubby hands holding
>pencils that feel unfamiliar, learning to make letters. (SNIP)
Copy/pasted and sent to Laura who is missing this to show her that Ger can give
of himself.
Tony
jake
> My father, in an earlier age, got the
>head battered off him for writing with the Devil's Hand, I was just
>corrected on it.
(I don't want to mess the flow up, but I imagine there to be a lot of
frustrated, true *lefties* in Ireland now that you've written this...)
-snip-
>Anyways, I don't want to get all deep & mystic hippy about it or
>anything, but every now & then I have to doublethink myself when I see
>a sign on the Interstate, & I remember those old boys in Glen burying
>their dead under 40 ton gravestones facing the front of the world.
Deep and mystic hippy is not a bad thing on you, Gerard. You wear it
well. Insomnia was my friend this morning...but I don't think I could
suspend myself in my mind's eye like you can -- too much of a
two-dimensional thinker, I suppose.
--jake
Xbelfast
Nice peice that.I have always had to look to be sure meowndammself.
>So here's the thing. To orient[sic!] myself in the Universe, I
>imagine myself standing at home, West behind me, East in front, South
>above, and North below.
I Just can't make this work (above)
Xbelfast
SADS
Hockersmith
news:37626775...@justinian.idps.co.uk...
> Hockersmith wrote:
> > Ahhh Christian...you've simultaneously frightened (the livin' daylights
out
> > of) me and made me happy (I'm no where near Chicago)! :)
> > Congrats!!!
>
> Play Iggy Pop music and get pulled over for driving while cool!
Ahhhhhh we're gettin' old Greig!
KateH
Hockersmith
news:19990614073535...@ng-cd1.aol.com...
> Gerard wrote:
> >So here's the thing. To orient[sic!] myself in the Universe, I
> >imagine myself standing at home, West behind me, East in front, South
> >above, and North below.
>
> I Just can't make this work (above)
> Xbelfast
The Irish really DO look at the world a little differently, eh?
KateH
Hockersmith
news:376b75e2...@il.news.verio.net...
> (sadly snipped)
> Anyways, I don't want to get all deep & mystic hippy about it or
> anything, but every now & then I have to doublethink myself when I see
> a sign on the Interstate, & I remember those old boys in Glen burying
> their dead under 40 ton gravestones facing the front of the world.
Depth *AND* soul? :)
Loved it.
KateH
Breathnac
Cunningham wrote:
>
> [raises hand, checks to see if its left or right]
>
> So anyways, there we are in naona bheaga, small chubby hands holding
> pencils that feel unfamiliar, learning to make letters. Along comes
> the teacher, takes the pencil out of my left hand, places it in my
> right. I was five, what did I know, I went along with it. I don't
> want to make a big deal of it. My father, in an earlier age, got the
> head battered off him for writing with the Devil's Hand, I was just
> corrected on it.
This is one of my favourite subjects, the brutal treatment dished out to the
sinister minority, the Kithoges - left handed people. It's not that long ago in
Ireland when this was considered a sign of possession. I wouldn't mind, all I did
was the odd pig sacrifice and things like that. I'm lucky enough - no one forced me
to change hands, even though I had my fair share of puritanical priests and
Christian Brothers.
Who on SCI is a SCIthoge as a matter of interest?
Breathnach,
ebu...@alltel.net
> Gerard wrote:
> >So here's the thing. To orient[sic!] myself in the Universe, I
> >imagine myself standing at home, West behind me, East in front, South
> >above, and North below.
>
> I Just can't make this work (above)
In order to make this work, I think you must really have a large
landmark that influences your thinking all the time. Growing up, the
sea was always east. It's like that thing KateH said about Florida, you
never got lost because you could always drive til you hit the ocean.
At home there were always water people. My mom wasn't a water person -
it scared her and she never much enjoyed it unless it was sterilzed,
chlorinated and caged inside a concrete pool. I always liked the water
though, and never more than at night or in a storm. We got along just
fine, and I never got lost when I was there. Or if I did, I don't think
I ever got panicked enough about it to realize that I was lost. I'm not
sure if there's a difference. At the time though I hated living in that
part of the world. It's smelly, humid and always too hot, and there's
never any dramatic change in the seasons like here in NE Georgia.
Someone from Orlando came to tour our facility last week and said, "you
people live in a desert." I almost laughed, because it's not THAT arid
here, but it's all about perception, and I really prefer this place.
The thing I miss though is the sea, or rather the vast intercoastal
waterways that I grew up in. And as much as I love them, I've never
been able to use the rolling hills as a compass of any kind, I get lost
in them all the time. I guess that means I'm not a mountain person. You
just have to find the element that you have an affinity to, whether you
do it the hippy way with full moon rituals and drum frenzies, or if you
just know in your own mind what- well, what floats your boat.
Laura on Deja
ebu...@alltel.net
> GER WROTE:
>
> >So anyways, there we are in naona bheaga, small chubby hands holding
>
> Copy/pasted and sent to Laura who is missing this to show her that
Ger can give
> of himself.
Thanks Tony. Oh, and nice posting, mystic hippy.
ebu...@alltel.net
Breathnac <brea...@mindspring.com> wrote:
> Who on SCI is a SCIthoge as a matter of interest?
You know this is funny, because I used to be an ambi. I can vaguely
remember using both hands for a lot of things. No one ever "corrected"
me, but from what I understand there were a few teachers who "expressed
concern" that I didn't show a dominant hand as quickly as they'd like.
I don't remember any stigma being attached to it, just some mild
speculation as to which hand I'd picked to be my dominant writing hand.
I think what decided it for me was my best friend at the time, Katie
Lucas, who was a skinny little girl with white blonde hair, fair skin
and a horrible left handed posture, hunched over with her head almost
touching the desktop and her arm curled in an unnatural spiral around
her pencil. Almost like writing upside down. I remember not wanting to
be that torutured. So I started coloring with my left hand, and writing
with my right hand, and that was the beginning of the end of my ambi
career.
ACooper213
>This is one of my favourite subjects, the brutal treatment dished out to the
>sinister minority, the Kithoges - left handed people.
>Who on SCI is a SCIthoge as a matter of interest?
The nuns in my grade school considered my left handedness a sign of the devil.
They would prowl the aisles of desks armed with a wooden ruler with a brass
strip edge and whack my wrist whenever they caught me. I resisted, and am
left-handed to this day. The devil is still in me, though.
Most left-handers write "upside down" with the hand above the writing. I write
with my hand below the writing and the wrist tucked in close to my body.
Subconcious protection from the whackers in black.
Right handed people do not know the problems we lefties have.
...those chair/desks have the writing surface on the right side.
...side spiral notebooks have the spiral on the left side which impedes my
writing.
....printing slants the opposite direction for left handed people making them
have a great deal of trouble in Mechanical and Architectural drawing classes if
they have a prick like Mordie Lee as their teacher.
...scissors bend, maul, dent, and tear...but do not cut for left handers.
...punch bowl ladles and gravy ladles pour to the left and pour all over the
tablecloth for left handers.
...cap gun holsters (if you are old enough to have played cowboys and indians)
are made for right handed draw. I was killed before I could finish slapping
leather.
....baseball mitts are available left handed, but if you were a poor kid and
had to borrow a right handed person's, you had to catch the ball in the left
hand, transfer the ball to the right hand, discard the mitt, transfer the ball
back to the left hand, and then throw the ball. A bunt can turn into an
in-the-park home run. I was always chosen last.
...eating at a crowded table forces the left hander to tuck in his elbow and
move only the wrist to get food to his mouth. We constantly fight for a corner
seat at the table.
...waitresses always place coffee to the right. After I've moved it to the
left side, they swoop back and move it. They refuse to provide a refill if the
cup is not on the right.
...power tools like electrical saws are designed for the right handed. If I
use the tool left handed, I can't see the cut.
...left handed golf clubs are never on sale, and other golfers constantly tell
me I'm on the wrong side of the ball. Actually, after I hit, I am often still
on the wrong side of the ball.
...bolt action rifles like the M-1 require the left hander to reach across to
throw the bolt. This disqualified me from combat duty when I was in the army
since an enemy soldier could beat me to death with a sponge before I could fire
a round.
And the positive side of being left handed....we are all brilliant and creative
people.
Tony
Breathnac
ACooper213 wrote:
> BREATHNAC ADDED TO WHAT GER WROTE SAYING:
>
> >This is one of my favourite subjects, the brutal treatment dished out to the
> >sinister minority, the Kithoges - left handed people.
>
> >Who on SCI is a SCIthoge as a matter of interest?
>
>
> Right handed people do not know the problems we lefties have.
<snip - much harder when you're left handed>
Thank you Tony. You forgot to mention we die younger.
Breathnach
Breathnac
Kate wrote:
>Tony wrote:
> >Right handed people do not know the problems we lefties have.
> >...side spiral notebooks have the spiral on the left side which impedes my
> >writing.
>
> They do make those for lefties, but they're tough to find.
Wouldn't this mean you'd have to start at the back page and write backwards. Nothing
wrong with this. I always read a magazine and newspaper starting at the back page. I
attribute this to being left handed, although my uncle, who is right handed, does
the same thing. He blames the Sunday World newspaper. The football results were
always at the back page so he started there. Funny thing, if you started at the
front page you'd see a scantily clad woman.
Breathnach
Xbelfast
>to accomodate the sinistri among us.
^^^^^^^
Buzzzzt.........Italian word not on topic. lol
Xbelfast
SADS
jake
<brea...@mindspring.com> wrote:
>
>
>Cunningham wrote:
>
>This is one of my favourite subjects, the brutal treatment dished out to the
>sinister minority, the Kithoges - left handed people. It's not that long ago in
>Ireland when this was considered a sign of possession. I wouldn't mind, all I did
>was the odd pig sacrifice and things like that. I'm lucky enough - no one forced me
>to change hands, even though I had my fair share of puritanical priests and
>Christian Brothers.
>
>Who on SCI is a SCIthoge as a matter of interest?
Funny how the gene pool plays out -- my husband had very bad luck when
he was birthed...dislodged his left arm right out of socket. Then he
broke the same arm when it came time to learn to print in
kindergarten, and AGAIN in first grade! (a bit clumsy, but totally
loveable). We *think* he should have been left handed, because the
rest of his body seems 'wired' to the left -- left-eyed, kicks left,
etc. My boys all seem to be ambidexterous -- strong left kickers in
soccer, but right handed. Two have left eye orientation, and the
other right.
I wasn't kidding when I said 'frustrated' lefties ... many children
forced to use their right hand to write ARE exactly that....when
discovered, doctors tell them to utilize their left side of the body
with greater purpose, in order to satisfy the frustration.
--jake
Laura
>I wasn't kidding when I said 'frustrated' lefties ... many children
>forced to use their right hand to write ARE exactly that....when
>discovered, doctors tell them to utilize their left side of the body
>with greater purpose, in order to satisfy the frustration.
Errr, doing what exactly?
--
Laura
~~~~~
Eve took a fruit, Eve bit the fruit
juice ran down her chin.
Babies will put things in their mouth
Never heard of Sin.
-Joan O.
jake
>jake wrote in message <37654e7c....@news.erols.com>...
>
>>I wasn't kidding when I said 'frustrated' lefties ... many children
>>forced to use their right hand to write ARE exactly that....when
>>discovered, doctors tell them to utilize their left side of the body
>>with greater purpose, in order to satisfy the frustration.
>
>
>Errr, doing what exactly?
I've had my mind lifted to a higher plane, Sister Laura. Sure and of
course I meant working, digging and all manner of pure and genuine
activity of the noblest of enterprises....
--jake
>
>
Laura
>I've had my mind lifted to a higher plane, Sister Laura. Sure and of
>course I meant working, digging and all manner of pure and genuine
>activity of the noblest of enterprises....
What's satisfying about that?
Ohhhhh, you meant the other kind of frustration.
Xbelfast
>>Buzzzzt.........Italian word not on topic. lol
Kate said:
>Latin.
Latin is old version of Italian, sort of. I was close.
(takes foot outa mouth)
Xbelfast
SADS
MacHamish
wrote:
>>...side spiral notebooks have the spiral on the left side which impedes my
>>writing.
>
>They do make those for lefties, but they're tough to find.
No problem. Use that lefty creativity. Just flip it over and write from
back to front.
MacHamish, a righty
Xbelfast
>Laura
>Errr, doing what exactly?
>
I am glad you went for it first.
Xbelfast
SADS
jake
>>in order to satisfy the frustration.
>
>>Laura
>
>>Errr, doing what exactly?
>>
>
>I am glad you went for it first.
See? You'd NEVER have this sort of problem with your mind if you'd
stayed in Belfast, Tony. There, you'd never think a nasty
thought...nope, narey a one.
--jake
Carrie Jean Cochrane
>Right handed people do not know the problems we lefties have.
http:\\www.thelefthand.com
C.C.
ICQ#9143177
Hockersmith
news:37652CBA...@mindspring.com...
> ACooper213 wrote:
> > BREATHNAC ADDED TO WHAT GER WROTE SAYING:
to the
> > >sinister minority, the Kithoges - left handed people.
> >
> >
> Thank you Tony. You forgot to mention we die younger.
> Breathnach
*Nobody* gets out of vacumming......
Before *I* do. :)
KateH
Hockersmith
news:19990614121548...@ng-fk1.aol.com...
> BREATHNAC ADDED TO WHAT GER WROTE SAYING:
>
> >This is one of my favourite subjects, the brutal treatment dished out to
the
> >sinister minority, the Kithoges - left handed people.
>
> >Who on SCI is a SCIthoge as a matter of interest?
>
>
> Right handed people do not know the problems we lefties have.
>
>
I
> use the tool left handed, I can't see the cut.
You watch while you're using one of those? I always close my eyes.
I'm sorta glad that the lefties don't seem to be pouring outa the
woodwork......I was feeling like a member of the minority right. :) But
maybe they just haven't confessed ...... because they haven't figured out
which one is Fred and what the hell the other hand's name is yet!
Kate(y'all are startin' to worry me)H